Chapter Text
You weren’t sure if you could do this again.
Desperate for distraction while the test ran, you half-heartedly carried on with your morning routine. It took five minutes. It felt more like five weeks. You messed with your hair, rearranged the toothbrushes, busied yourself with things you’d never normally give such attention.
The doctors had said the chances of it ‘affecting future conception were low to non-existent’.
Each time the second line was absent, you believed them less. You believed the voice in your head more, the one that spilled and stained like ink in water.
It had been your choice, and he’d stuck with you. He took you to and from the appointment. He’d made sure you wanted for nothing; a hot water bottle, painkillers, a soft bed and his presence for comfort. Words had escaped him, but the silence had been enough reassurance. Watching the rise and fall of his chest as he’d slept next to you was your meditation. Every breath he took helped wash the threads of a fraying mind until thoughts rested and smoothed.
That was two years ago. You’d been young and afraid. It hadn’t been the time. There had been a hundred reasons why, and now you were cursing listening to them. You felt broken, and by your own hand.
Hands clasping the back of your neck, you paced the bathroom. The timer on your phone chirped with all the weight of a funeral bell. You gritted your teeth and walked to the sink, eyes closed, until you felt the cool surface pressed against your belly.
Deep breath.
Life will go on.
This isn’t the end.
There’s always tomorrow.
You forced your eyes open and locked on the test.
Two. Two perfect pink lines. All the air left your lungs, rattling your throat with a yelp.
He crashed into the bathroom, blue eyes wide and searching. Noct thought you’d slipped again or cut yourself shaving. You practically threw the test at him, gaping and unable to keep your hands still. Blessed by fast reflexes, he caught it before it could hit him square in the face. He took one look and dropped the test.
“What? Are you-?”
“Yeah!” you nodded, watching his eyes turn into saucers.
His mouth fell open. He paled as he swayed, gripping the doorframe for purchase. For a moment, you were sure he’d faint. When he lunged forwards, you thought he had.
Lean arms wrapped around you, desperately clinging to you. You laughed in disbelief and hugged him back, grinning into his shoulder. He was trembling. Ragged breaths left him as attempts at words, but he just couldn’t find the right ones. This was indescribable. Unbelievable. Real.
“I can’t believe we- hell… we really did, huh?”
You leant back to look at him. Pale lips were spread in an astonished smile. You nodded and watched his eyes spark with the burning blue ashes of the magic he used.
“Hell yeah, we did.”