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Matt was usually a confident guy. Though, the key word was “usually”.
Most of the time, Matt really was confident. For a highschooler, he had incredibly high self-esteem, especially when being compared to his friends(though, a bug probably had higher self-esteem than Edd, Tom and Tord combined). He talked to mostly everyone with a cheerful and upbeat tone, always ready to spend time with people; he was the perfect example of an extrovert. There were only a few situations where he would suddenly get shy, namely when there’s a camera on him, and anything that involved romance.
Unfortunately, one of those situations happened to sneak up on him.
Matt didn’t realize he was getting a crush until months after the crush probably initially developed. He just found himself suddenly getting bashful around the person he liked. He’d say things to try and get their approval. When they’d compliment him, his cheeks would flush a hot red and he’d flash a sheepish smile. When they’d laugh at something, he’d feel his heart flutter a bit. It was absolutely cliché, but Matt couldn’t help it. He couldn’t stand this feeling, in fact. It made him feel so stupid and mushy, but at the same time it also made him feel happy. He did genuinely enjoy being around them, but it was getting harder and harder to keep his mouth shut. It was obvious to anyone that Matt wore his heart on his sleeve most of the time. Keeping his feelings shut inside for so long was starting to drive him insane. Something had to be done.
Matt’s desperation led him to Edd’s house. Truthfully, he didn’t know why he was here, since Edd kind of sucked at advice. Having him give Matt romantic advice sounded like hell on Earth. But, at the very least, Matt wanted to tell someone. Then, he wouldn’t have to carry the burden alone.
Matt knocked on the door loudly, waiting anxiously for it to open. Edd, whom had been playing Pokémon Red while sitting on the couch to kill some time, jumped when he heard the door knock. His mind was filled with paranoid thoughts of kidnappers and/or murderers being at his door for a few seconds, before he figured that it was probably just his parents coming back from their trip or something. He tossed his Game Boy aside and walked over to the front door. He swung it open to find his ginger friend standing there on the other side.
“Matt?” Edd said in a confused tone. “The hell are you doing here?” Though the question made it sound like he was irritated, his voice was as monotonic as ever.
“Uh, hey Edd!” Matt smiled nervously at Edd as he greeted him. “I just, uhm...wanted to come over and talk to you!”
“Oh. Did...something happen?” Edd questioned. It was a bit odd that Matt would just show up to his house unannounced, but he brushed it off as Matt forgetting to text him or something like that.
“No, no! I just...wanted to talk to ya, you know…?” Matt rubbed the back of his neck with a small smile.
“Uh...okay.” Edd shrugged. “Come in, I guess.” He stepped aside to let Matt walk in. Once Matt stepped in, he closed the door and walked back over to the couch, picking up his Game Boy. Matt sat next to him, looking off at the wall with a troubled gaze.
“So…did ya wanna talk about somethin’ specific, or…?” Edd prompted, clearly reading his friend’s troubled stare. He glanced down at his Game Boy, saving his game before glancing back up at Matt.
“Er...yeah, actually,” Matt answered. “I, uh...wanted to talk to you about something. Well, more like tell you something. Or, maybe I’m...asking you for advice? Ugh, I dunno.” He huffed softly to himself in frustration.
Edd hummed. It wasn’t like Matt to stammer and trip over his words like that. Must be a big deal, then. “Well, spit it out,” he said to Matt a bit impatiently.
“I-I…” Matt’s face grew red as he glanced off to the side. “I...I, uh, have a crush on someone,” he muttered, just loud enough for Edd to hear. He glanced up at his friend for a moment before glancing down at his Game Boy again.
“Heh, really now?” Edd snickered. That was it? Geez, he was expecting a lot more. “‘M kinda surprised. I figured you didn’t like anyone else but yourself,” he teased.
“Hey!” Matt huffed.
“Well,” Edd continued, not looking up from his Game Boy. “Who is she? Or, he? I don’t fucking know if you’re gay or not. Is it some random popular kid I don’t know or some shit?”
“Actually, uh...it’s Tord,” Matt admitted softly.
If Edd had been drinking water, he surely would have spat it out right then. His eyes widened, but it wasn’t visible underneath his bangs. “Tord?!” He suddenly yelled, unable to contain his surprise. “It’s seriously fucking Tord ?!”
“H-Hey!” Matt huffed again. “I didn’t ask you to judge me!”
“But-But you have a crush on Tord of all people!” Edd set his Game Boy down, now unable to focus on it.
When it came to Tord and Matt, the two were almost complete opposites, at least social status wise. Matt was the super popular kid everyone liked and Tord was the weird, lone wolf that everyone was kinda scared of. It was almost unfathomable that Matt would ever even look at Tord, nonetheless get feelings for him.
“So?” Matt crossed his arms.
“I-I dunno! It’s just weird! Literally no one coulda expected that!” Edd regained his composure a bit, his voice getting back to its normal volume and his tone becoming even again. “Well, anyway, what do you want me to do? Be your wingman or some gay shit?”
“No, I don’t think I need a wingman.” Matt shook his head. “Plus, you’d probably be a terrible one.”
“Hey! I’d at least be mildly adequate.”
“Right.” Matt chuckled. “But, I just...don’t know what to do. I really wanna tell him, but...I’m not sure if I should do it right away. Maybe I should start out with something else.”
“You could get Tord a gift. I mean, everyone likes gifts,” Edd suggested with a shrug. “Pretty sure he especially likes gifts, too. Like, he gets really happy when people give him shit. I mean, you could give him a peanut and he’d cry out of appreciation.”
“Well, you’re not exactly wrong.” Matt laughed. “But, I don’t wanna get him a peanut! I’d probably just get him some anime shit or something.”
“Yeah, that’d probably work. It’d make his weeb heart go doki doki or some shit.”
Matt giggled at what Edd said. “Hopefully.”
“See? Told you I could help,” Edd boasted.
“Never said you couldn’t. I just said you’d be a terrible wingman.”
“I would not!”
A few hours of arguing and dicking around later, Matt left Edd’s house because unfortunately, school was still a thing and he needed to sleep.
But first, he had to stop at the store.
The next day of school dragged on. It was as boring as it ever was, but it was slightly anxiety-filled for Matt. The things he had bought for Tord were in his backpack, ready to be gifted at lunch, which couldn’t come sooner. As soon as the bell rang, Matt zoomed out, barely talking to anyone as he speedwalked to his locker. He opened his bookbag up, and quickly took out the gift. Matt walked to the cafeteria, seeing the other three seated at their usual table. Edd and Tom were sitting next to each other, conversing about something that Matt couldn’t hear from the distance. Tord watched them talk, but didn’t add any comments himself. Matt walked over to the three, sitting next to Tord and setting the present in his lap. Edd and Tom didn’t seem to notice Matt yet, too caught up in their conversation. At least they wouldn’t interrupt him.
“Hey, Tord!” Matt greeted in a cheerful tone with a smile. Tord jumped a bit, quickly turning around toward Matt.
“Oh, hi Matthew! I...did not see you there,” the Norwegian replied, returning Matt’s smile with one of his own.
“U-Uh, how are you doing?” Matt blushed, now being reduced to a stuttering mess just by Tord smiling at him.
“I am doing well. You are doing well, as well?” Tord asked.
“Yeah! I’m fine.” Matt smiled. After his reply, the two had fallen into a silence that felt awkwardly suffocating to Matt. After a few moments of gathering(or rather,
re
gathering) some confidence, he decided to break the silence by saying, “Sooo, I have something for you.”
“Eh?” Tord tilted his head. “For me?”
“Yeah, for you!” Matt picked up the gift off of his lap and handed it to him. Tord looked up at Matt, as if almost hesitant to take it. After a few seconds, he slowly grabbed it, assuming that Matt really did want him to have it. He looked over what Matt had given him. It was the first volume of a manga series. Specifically, it looked to be a horror series.
Tord’s eyes widened a bit. He looked up at Matt in disbelief. Of course, he loved manga. To add on, he loved horror just as much. What made it even better was that it was something new ; something he had never read before. For at least a little while, he’d actually have something entertaining to do other than sit in a room and jack off all day.
“You-You got this for me?!” Tord gasped out, making sure that Matt really wanted him to have this.
“Yeah! I saw it and I thought of you!” Matt semi-lied. He really did think of Tord when he saw it, but he didn’t just happen to stumble upon it. Truthfully, it took a lot of looking to find it. But hey, Tord didn’t need to know that!
“You-! I-” Tord stammered, his mouth working way faster than his mind. He struggled to come up with the proper words to say. Eventually, he decided on, “Thank you, Matthew! You are best!” He smiled brightly, his arms wrapping around the manga to hold it close to his chest. He was truly flattered that anyone thought of him, especially Matt. It was nice to know that people thought of him when he wasn’t around.
Honestly, Matt would have done just about anything to see Tord smile like that again. He rarely saw the other flash such a genuinely happy smile. It was so goddamn adorable. It made him blush intensely and grin like an idiot. After realizing he had probably been staring at Tord for a few seconds, he looked away and muttered, “N-No problem.” Tord remained completely oblivious to Matt’s stammering and blushing.
They fell back into silence again, but they were both still grinning like idiots. Meanwhile, Tom and Edd continued to talk like nothing had happened.
That day had started up a routine. Every week or so, Matt would give Tord some random gift at lunch. It’d range from art supplies to books to some random anime merch. Surprisingly, Tord never got used to it. He had never been accustomed to receiving things for free out of nowhere. Hell, he almost felt guilty . Really, Matt was just wasting his money on him, wasn’t he? It especially felt unfair when he had nothing to gift back to him. Matt was just giving him things for seemingly no reason, and asked for nothing in return. Tord didn’t want Matt to waste his money on him, but the ginger had insisted that he wanted to give him these things.
As a way to pay him back, Tord began to draw things for Matt. He had been getting better at art, especially with Edd’s help. It wasn’t Picasso or anything, but Matt found it cute and he appreciated the clear effort and care that was put into every piece of art he received from the Norwegian. He saved all of the doodles Tord gave him and stored them in a drawer.
Even though the mini gift exchange usually only happened once a week or so, Matt and Tord began to grow closer overall. They talked to each other a lot more(well, more like Matt talked and Tord mostly stayed silent and listened), and began to hang out one-on-one more often, which definitely wasn’t something they did before. While they hang out, Matt tried to drop hints as to how he felt. However, they went right over Tord’s head. Whenever Matt held his hand, Tord just assumed that it was platonic affection. When Matt would try(and mostly fail) to smoothly flirt with him, he simply just laughed it off. He barely understood what Matt said in the first place, nonetheless actually understood what Matt meant.
However, Tord had been struggling with his own feelings himself. He had come to take a liking to Matt. A big liking. After a bit of thinking(and also looking it up on the computers at the library), he had come to the conclusion that the admiration he felt for Matt had bloomed into love. And that, in a way, made him feel torn. He was a nobody, after all. There was no way that Matt would like him like that. So, he never spoke his feelings. Matt never spoke his feelings outright either, too nervous to actually say anything.
Edd and Tom both watched this all play out. It was so fucking obvious that Tord and Matt liked each other. It was almost irritating to the other two. One day, while Tord and Matt were giving each other gifts, Edd had commented, “It’s so fucking gay I feel like I’m trapped in a bloody Skittles bag.”
To Tom and Edd, it felt like watching a bowling ball roll down an alley very slowly, only for it to always go in the gutter at the last moment. Tom swore that if neither of them made a move, he was going to do it for them. After a few months, they had grown tired of seeing Tord and Matt do affectionate things to each other, only for them to deny any feelings when asked about it.
To be fair, it was also killing Matt. He desperately wanted to tell Tord how he felt and get it over with already. But, every time he tried, he always backtracked and stopped himself before he could get anything out. He couldn’t keep bottling this shit up. He had to say it already before he bursted like a shaken up soda can.
Matt invited Tord over to his house after school. Tord, of course, had to ask his guardian if he could before actually going over. Thankfully, Tord was allowed to come over, and he showed up at Matt’s house about an hour after school had ended.
They spent a while just playing video games and having some brief conversations. Though, after they had gotten bored of video games(well, Matt had gotten bored. Tord was always mesmerized by video games and never really got bored of them), Matt decided to put in a movie. Since Tord suggested it, Matt picked out a horror movie to play. They sat next to each other on the couch and watched it in silence. After a while, Tord had absent-mindedly grabbed Matt’s hand and intertwined their fingers together. When Matt felt Tord grab his hand, his cheeks flushed red. It wasn’t abnormal for Tord to hold his hand out of nowhere, but something about doing it while sitting on the couch felt so...intimate. Matt didn’t know what came over him, but he began to speak before he could even comprehend he was speaking. “Hey, Tord,” he said over the mostly quiet scene in the movie. “Can...Can I tell you something?”
“Eh?” Tord looked over at Matt. “What something do you want to tell me?” He questioned.
“I-I…” Matt looked a deep breath. Fuck, he was really going to do it. He mustered up all of the courage in him and said, “I like you. I like you a lot.”
“Well….yes. We are friends, yes?” Tord looked a little confused.
“No, no-! Well, yes! Yes, we’re friends, but-” Matt took a few seconds to compose himself and form a coherent sentence. “I-I...I want to be more than that. I was...wondering if you’d like to go out with me…” He trailed off, glancing over at Tord and hoping the other would get what he was saying.
“Out? Like, out like on date?” Excitement slowly bubbled up in Tord, but he kept his voice even. He didn’t want to get his hopes up.
“Yes! Like on a date!” Matt nodded a little too quickly.
“A-Ah...really? You are sure?” Tord masked his surprise and excitement in a poker face, once again not wanting to get his hopes up.
“Yeah! Positive!”
Tord was thrown for a loop. Of course, he liked Matt and would honestly love to date him, but...why did Matt like him? They were so different, socially. No one knew who he was. He was absolutely inferior compared to everyone else. He could never comprehend how Matt was so nice to him. Hell, he couldn’t even understand why the other two hung around him. He probably never would understand. Perhaps it was pointless to try and understand.
“Why me?” Tord eventually asked. “Why is it me? Why do you want me to be date?”
“I-I dunno,” Matt replied. “I can’t control my feelings! I-I just know I want to date you!”
“Well, I…” Tord trailed off, trying to think about what he wanted to say. The answer seemed easy but yet, he was admittedly a little afraid. Should he really be able to feel some genuine happiness in his daily life, even at the risk of suddenly losing it one day?
After a bit of thinking, Tord decided that it was worth a shot. He had lost things before. If it happened again, he could get over it. “I...do not understand why you’d like me, but...I think it will be nice to be your date.”
“Really?” Matt’s anxious waiting was broken by Tord’s answer. For a few moments, he truly believed he had fucked everything up.
Tord nodded silently. Matt, suddenly overwhelmed with a large wave of surprise and happiness, lunged forward and wrapped his arms around Tord in a tight hug. Tord squeaked in surprise at the sudden affection, but ended up hugging Matt back. A weight had been lifted off of both of them.
Finally, Matt could get back to being purely confident.