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Too Pretty for a Hookup

Summary:

Kara sets up a one night stand with a brunette. But when she meets her at the bar, things don't go as planned. AKA the Tinder One-Night Stand One-Shot AU that no one asked for.

Notes:

Back at it with the one-shots. This one (once again) features a dorky Kara that is just too hilarious for her own good. Lena is speechless from her adorable dorkiness. This was inspired by an ask that was sent to me by MegxRubia on Tumblr saying she just did something crazy and agreed to a one night stand with someone on Tinder. My hand slipped and this little one-shot came to life! Enjoy:)

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Kara clicked on the accept button on the screen and immediately cringed. Gasping as she saw the evidence of the decision she'd been hesitating to make for the past 3 hours.

A one night stand.

On an app called Triple L - which Kara realized after much much thought that it stood for Ladies Loving Ladies. It was an app that Alex had installed for her out of the obligation of getting Kara to hook up with someone to break the dry spell she had been on.

Kara, it's not a big deal. You hook up for one night, have a great time, and then you never see them ever again. You need this.’

Unfortunately, her sister was right. As much as Kara hated to admit it and would probably never will. She had been on edge lately. Jittery and easily irritable. She tried everything. From meditation to stress relieving herbal teas to soft music playing in the background. But it was as though her body was always frustrated.

Sexually frustrated.

Which brings her to this moment. She had clicked yes to a brunette one night stand she matched with that she was already regretting. The act of tapping on the screen to accept took at least 3 or 4 hours of pacing and huffing and sighing and eyeing the cursed device. But eventually, she willed the tip of her finger to lightly touch the glass screen.

And now here she was. Regretting it. Que another 3 hours of pacing.


Kara sat at the bar twirling her straw in what was some type of cherry cocktail with lots of that vodka stuff that didn't affect her. She wasn't sure what was in her cocktail or why she even ordered it. But something about the cliché of drowning your nervousness in a drink seemed somewhat comforting. She had seen it in movies and TV shows and found it to be an interesting behavior at first. Drinking something that can alter your brain to make you do stupid things because you were scared of doing stupid things to begin with.

She could never fully understand humans.

But she didn't argue that the color of her drink sure managed to take her mind off of her night. It was a peculiar kind of red. Not crimson red but not pink either. It was more of a...

“Ms. Danvers?”

“Yes, that's...”

Kara turned towards the voice and almost gasped. A beautiful brunette with striking green eyes stood before her who can only be described as a victim for having a profile picture that did absolute no justice to the real thing.

Kara's eyes followed the ruby diamond hanging around a chiseled neck and dropping just shy of a peeking cleavage. The woman wore tight black pair of jeans with a sleeveless white blouse held around her neck and dipping low enough for Kara to notice the black bra underneath.

Kara's eyes shot up before she lingered longer than what was appropriate, going up to meet green ones that effortlessly stole her breath away. They were forest green, but shone bright whenever the light shone at them. Kara's mouth opened and closed, trying to grasp onto the words she was about to speak, but her mind suffered a short circuit that enjoyed it far too much.

“Ms. Danvers, are you alright?”

Kara suddenly shut her gaped mouth and shook her head defiantly. “Nope. This isn't happening.” she pressed her lips tightly in frustration.

Just my luck! Just my darn annoying luck!

“I beg your Pardon?” the woman raised a perfectly styled eyebrow and Kara had to drag her eyes away from it.

She shook her head more as she shrugged in defiance, “You're way too pretty for me to just hook up with you for one night and not immediately fall in love you.” she blurted out in one go, sighing at her unavoidable dire luck.

“So no. We are not doing this. I'm sorry I dragged you all the way here but this one night stand is not happening. Sorry.” she took a big gulp of whatever the name of her drink was and suddenly noticed a hint of pomegranate in its taste. “Way way too pretty, ” she mumbled to herself, “She expects me to just hook up with her. How do you just hook up with someone that pretty?!”

As much as her mind knew she should probably stop talking and practically begged her to, Kara's mouth just kept going. She turned back to the woman, eyebrows furrowed in frustration, “I mean honestly, you should come with a warning label or something. In your profile picture you were wearing sunglasses. And seriously that shouldn't be allowed. Especially with you having eyes as pretty as those .” she blatantly gestured to the woman's eyes, giving her a ‘duh’ expression.

She rolled her eyes before huffing out, “You shouldn't deceive people like that.” she muttered resentfully, “It's not very nice. You know you could seriously give someone a heart attack with eyes like that.” she turned away. Back to her now empty drink. She played with the thin red straw before sighing loudly, realizing she's not being very fair to someone who had driven all the way here for nothing.

“Anyway. I'm sorry again. I could pay for your cab if you want. Or maybe even drive you home. Actually no I flew here,” Kara's eyes bulged open, “O-onn a bus.”

Nice save.

“I can call you an Uber?” she offered, “I have five other options if those wouldn't work for you. You're a obviously too pretty to take the bus or the subway.” she suddenly gasped, “Not that people who ride the bus or subway aren't pretty! Oh no! I've met loads of pretty people on the bus!” she exclaimed defensively, trying to make sure this stranger believed her when she claimed she didn't find people on buses and subways ugly.

“This one time I met a woman on the subway who was soooo pretty that I missed my stop.”

She nodded, lips pressing in a thin line showing just how serious she was. Her serious expression lasted less than a second before she realized what she had said.

“Not... Not that I was staring at her stalkerishly! No I was very... Well I was very... I just didn't notice my stop because her eyes were distracting.”

She double backed again, “Nothing like your eyes though. Yours are like... Whew!” she chuckled nervously, “If I had to rank them on a scale of one,” she hovered her palm facedown a little below where she sat on the stool, gesturing to where the scale started, “to ten,” she reached up to show where the ten would be, “then your eyes would be...” she panicked when she realized she couldn't go any higher than where her hand was at the ten. She tried stretching her arm but there was only so little solid bones can stretch.

So she did what any sane person would do.

“Hold on.” she muttered as she shifted on the chair until she stood on her knees over the stool. When she reached the highest she could, she frowned, finding it not enough. Her eyes were at least a 100 on the scale. And where her hand reached now was more like a fifty.

On a scale of one to ten that is.

So, once again. She did what any sane person would do.

She stood fully on her stool, wobbling just a bit before balancing herself and reaching the highest she could.

“Your eyes would be here!”

Said eyes had widened immensely at Kara's elaborate display of passion towards demonstrating her ‘one to ten scale’ and where the woman's green eyes ranked.

The shocked woman finally shook herself from her stupor, “Why don't we get you down from there? I'd hate to see anything happen to you because of my eyes.” she braced her arms around Kara's form, prepared to catch the blonde if she so happened to stumble down.

Kara chuckled as she effortlessly flung herself back on the chair sitting down easily, hearing the woman's heart react suddenly in fear at how fast it all happened. “Well, I don't think I would mind going that way.”

The woman, Lena, took a second to gather herself before speaking, “I would. People would start blaming me for taking away your charming personality from this cruel world. I'd rather not have to defend myself.”

Kara had to admit she was somewhat surprised by the banter, not expecting the beautiful brunette to stick around after admitting she had no intention of sleeping with her.

“You seem like you can hold your own.” she replied confidently.

Lena took a step closer, her thigh brushing softly against Kara's knee. Her smile was devious as she spoke, “Well, you wouldn't know now would you, since I'm - How did you phrase it again? - too pretty to hook up with?”

Kara couldn't for the life of her believe her ears. She was flirting! This beautiful woman who Kara had made a complete fool of herself in front of and not to mention rejected was actually flirting with her.

“I'm not wrong. You are too pretty for a hook up. You should be wined and dined and taken on all sorts of cliché dates.” Kara mentioned as though it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Once again, Lena seemed taken back and had to spend a second staring at Kara before composing herself and speaking once more, “Well, I can't say I've ever been wined and dined and taken on cliché dates before. But a woman's bound to start somewhere, right?” she smiled softly, her eyes sparkling with hope. “Can I buy you a drink?” She asked suddenly.

Kara stared her with a flustered smile, her hand going to fix her glasses, “Umm yeah. Sure I'd... I'd like that. But...” she cringed, not wanting to ask her question but wanting so much to ask her question.

“What?” Lena asked with a worried smile on her lips.

“Well, it's just that I was supposed to hook up with you but then I canceled last minute. And anyone else would be at least frustrated that they came all the way out here for nothing. I'm just wondering...”

Lena leaned closer, thigh now pressing on Kara's knee, “Who said I came all the way here for nothing?” she whispered sultry.

Oh, wow. That voice can probably take away a person's will.

“Umm I...”

Lena took a step back, and Kara almost had to stop herself from reaching out and pulling her back. The confident woman suddenly seemed nervous, clasping her hands together and pressing on her knuckles.

“I've been on many of these one night stands with all sorts of different people.” she finally said before pausing as though not sure whether she should say her next words. “None of them have ever called me pretty. Hot, sexy, yes. Never pretty.” she let out a bitter laugh, “And you managed to make me smile on a day I was frustrated enough to set up a one night stand with a complete stranger just to take out my frustration somehow. So, if you're willing,” she looked down at her clasped hands nervously, “I would you like to take you out. On a proper date.”

Kara froze at her words, eyes widening at the request.

Lena seemed to have misunderstood her shock for rejection, “Of course, you don't ha...”

“Yes!” Kara finally managed to blurt out.

Lena looked at her skeptically, “Are you sure...?”

“Am I sure if I wanna go out on an actual real date with the prettiest woman here? Mhmm. Yup. Definitely sure. Positive. Absolutely a hundred percent on board.” Kara's head kept nodding eagerly, the back of her neck straining with so much force put into her nods.

Lena smiled, amused at Kara's passionate response, “Well, alright then. Shall we? I know a nice restaurant not far from here.”

Kara flew off her stool, placing a few bucks on the counter for her drink and turned with a wide blinding smile.

“Lead the way.”