Chapter Text
Most of the time, curiosity was only temporary. If people were interested in something, they would seek their answer and be happy with the answers they found. But for T’Challa, it was much different. He was always curious about just about everything. Just like his sister, Shuri, who was obsessed with science and technology. But Wakandans were born with automatic curiosity. Since he could remember, T’Challa saw everything in blurry images and nobody could give him an answer as to why. At first, it did not seem like the worst thing in the world – after all his younger sister and his cousin were both sharing the experience of having partial sight. But one night when Erik returned to America for a visit to his father’s grave, he could suddenly see everything clearly and nobody heard the last of it.
Now, at the age of thirteen, T’Challa still could not see clearly. He could barely make out shapes but he found it easy to identify people he was familiar with, such as one of his father’s protectors Okoye who made him feel much easier about his sight. Because of her efforts, T’Challa found it less difficult to train for the future mantle of the Black Panther. He couldn’t see his father in the suit but the stories T’Challa heard kept him up at night with imagination. In fact, all he could imagine was King T’Chaka’s face when he came home in his panther habit and greeted everyone with a happy tone. But at the same time, he was grateful that he couldn’t see his father’s face the nights T’Chaka stumbled into the palace as either workers or his mother would show great concern for his wounds. No greetings, just worries.
T’Challa wandered through the palace on his own with no idea of what to do. Okoye was on a mission with his father so he couldn’t spend his boredom training. Looking around, he could make out the shades of gold around the walls and the white pillars as he walked through the hallways that led to the gardens. I wonder what who that is, he thought to himself as he looked at a painting on the wall. If there wasn’t a shiny bronze frame around it, he would have never even guessed it was a painting. He continued to dawdle until he felt the corner of his eye collide with what felt like a palm. Before he could do anything, his body lost balance and he fell hard on the ground as something smashed next to him. It felt painful to land so awkwardly but it felt even worse to be laughed at, especially in front of everyone.
“Prince T’Challa, are you okay?” The worker asked with a panicked tone. She ignored the broken vase she had been moving and focused on helping the smaller boy up and getting him away from the debris. After all, he couldn’t see so she had to ensure that he kept his hands away from the broken shards. T’Challa grunted while she lifted him and heard Erik laughing hysterically with Shuri. Now he did not care about any pain he may have endured but instead found more harm to his reputation. “My prince, stay still, I must check for any cuts...”
Despite his best efforts to get away, the worker tried to calm him down and check if he was okay. All he wanted to do was leave but she wouldn’t let him. Erik yelled a few teasing jabs such as ‘clumsy ass’ and ‘watch your step’ which further embarrassed him. But soon the teasing ceased and so did the laughing – T'Challa knew exactly the reason. She walked to them and T’Challa could just make out her figure walking over to Erik’s blurry image.
“What have I told you about making fun of T’Challa?” Ramonda asked sternly, T’Challa could feel the serious expression she had on her face.
“Sorry, Auntie...sorry T’Challa...” Erik mumbled.
“And you Shuri, you still have blurred sight so you should not be laughing. Have more sympathy for your brother, you would not like it if he laughed at you or mocked you.”
Shuri’s head plopped down like Erik’s and she looked apologetic.
“Sorry Mother...sorry brother...”
The two kids left T’Challa and Ramonda alone, who dismissed the worker and thanked her for checking on T’Challa. His eyes began to dampen and he couldn’t control the crying that occurred after. Ramonda brought him in for a hug as he covered his face and she scratched the top of his head while comforting him. Usually, he would only be silent during times like this but as he grew older, he felt more shame in his situation despite the fact there were many people like him. T’Challa ached to know what his family looked like. What Wakanda looked like. He felt like it wasn’t fair, especially with his cousin seeing everything clearly before him.
“Why can I not see? Nobody will ever tell me why, not even N’Jadaka!” T’Challa sobbed.
“My son, do not worry. The reason why N’Jadaka will not tell you is that he does not know himself. Sit over here with me.”
Ramonda led T’Challa to the grass and sat with him. She admired his curiosity of the grass, seeing blurry patches of green between his fingers.
“Every Wakandan goes through this, T’Challa. I know you feel as if an injustice has been done to you but it is simply fate. When you were born, just like everyone else, you were born with blurred sight. I went through this too when I was a child, and even as a young adult. When I met your father, I could see clearly – I remember the day like it was yesterday.”
T’Challa scrunched his nose and looked at her with great confusion.
“So...I have to meet a girl who likes me?”
Ramonda smiled and looked at the sky with him.
“It could be a girl, it could be a boy, you won’t have a choice of who it is. Once you find your soulmate, you will see everything clearly. But there’s no telling who is your soulmate so only destiny can arrange that meeting.”
Once he had that clarification it made T’Challa feel better. At least now he knew what to expect, but something crossed his mind that made him frown. His mother noticed it once she turned her head and squeezed his shoulder gently.
“What is wrong, T’Challa? You know it is perfectly normal for a man to be soulmates with another man. You do not need to be afraid of what we or anybody thinks.”
Although it wasn’t on his mind it did give him comfort knowing if he was to be partnered with another boy he wouldn’t face any backlash. But what he was thinking about was much more worrying.
“It is not that. What if I never find my soulmate? Will I always be like this, will I die like this?”
It hurt Ramonda to hear her son think like this but she couldn’t lie to him. Some Wakandans did fail to find their soulmates before death, or when it was too late. But she knew her son would be different.
“I will not lie to you my son, there is a small possibility. But I know you will find your soulmate when the time is right. Do you want to know why?”
“Why?”
“Because you are just like your father. Whether you can see everything or nothing, you will never stop looking for an answer. You are a fighter, and I know you will keep on fighting until you find your soulmate. Keep your chin up, T’Challa. Bast will guide you through this.”
T’Challa smiled and hugged his mother tightly, happy and more than content with what he heard. For the rest of the day, T’Challa walked gleefully through the palace. He was going to see everything in clear sight one day.