Work Text:
It was around one in the morning, at least the clock said it was, when Yaz sat up in bed. Something seemed to be off. She wasn’t even sure what, just that there was a stifling pressure in the room, and there was a hum coming from the walls.
“Are you upset?” She asked quietly, looking around. With no answer, she slowly got out of bed and stretched. It was no time to be awake, but she couldn’t go back to sleep now.
She quietly made her way out of her room, and down the winding hallways to the main floor. It was quiet here, with no frantic movement and activity like normal. The doors were open, and for a moment she panicked, wondering if the air was being sucked out, before her eyes landed on the Doctor.
She was sitting on the edge, feet dangling out, and staring at the night sky. It was space, everything was night, but it seemed more beautiful while it was quiet.
“Doctor?”
“Oh! Hello! Did I wake you?” She asked cheerfully. There was a hitch in her voice, and Yaz’ eyebrows knit together.
“Maybe. Not really sure. What’s going on?” She asked, approaching slowly.
“I don’t know. Nothing for you to worry about.” She smiled. It was strained.
Yaz frowned and sat down beside her, carefully sliding forward and dangling her legs off the edge. She grabbed the Doctors arm when she swore she felt a breeze from the darkness almost push her out. The Doctor placed a hand over hers.
“It’s alright. There’s a protective barrier, and shielding. You won’t float away. You’ll float, but not away.” She smiled. Yaz broke into a laugh.
“Alright then. What are you looking at?” Yaz asked, starting to remove her grip. Again, she felt a sway in the machine, and grabbed the Doctors pants leg. She placed her hand over Yaz’ and frowned.
“Stop it now!” She said loudly, looking at the ceiling. Yaz chuckled again, and the Doctor cracked a smile.
“I was just looking at the planet Midnight. It’s one of the things I never figured out, and really don’t want to. It was terrible. Painful even.” She said.
“It’s beautiful. But why are you looking at it if you don’t like it?” Yaz asked.
“Oh, no, I love it! I love a good mystery. I just don’t want to go back. But... there are some mysteries I need to solve, and I don’t know how. I thought it might be inspirational.” She said, staring at the shining planet.
“Like what mystery? Maybe I can help.” Yaz said. The Doctor turned to look at her and smiled, before looking at their hands, still gripped together.
“Maybe.” She said quietly, giving a sad smile and looking away. Yaz waited, and finally she spoke up.
“Have you ever liked someone you’re not suppose to?” The Doctor asked. There was no give-away on her face, just genuine curiosity, and Yaz swallowed hard before nodding.
“Yeah. Not like my family would accept it.” She said quietly. The Doctor just nodded before continuing.
“Do you think it’s wrong? To like someone, when you barely know them? When you don’t even know if they’re interested in your type?” She asked skeptically. Yaz tilted her head and sighed. Whether type meant gender, species, or blonde, she didn’t know.
“It depends. I think if they’re a good person, maybe you can just go for it. The worst that happens is you learn their not interested.” Yaz said. The Doctor took a deep breath and stared out at the stars.
“The worst that happens is they hurt you, and leave you.” She said. Yaz nodded in understanding. She had thought the same, maybe worse, but she didn’t want to discourage her.
“So, who’re you interested in then?” She asked. The Doctor sighed.
“Oh god, is it Graham?” Yaz asked.
“No! It’s a... girl.” She said quietly. Yaz nodded.
“You ever dated a girl before?” Yaz asked quietly. She looked down at their hands again and took a steadying breath.
“Well, not officially. It’s complicated. I’ve had many relationships, and we never defined them. I’ve kissed plenty of women, and men, and queens, and some lizards, a bird, and these creatures with four genders! Many, many more, too. I’ve even married a few people! But I’ve never been a woman. I’ve always been a man. It might be different. I’m not sure.”
“Different how?” Yaz asked. She was quiet for a moment.
“I don’t know. I might do it wrong?” She said. Yaz nodded.
She looked at the Doctors shy face, where she was staring at their hands, and slowly rubbing her thumb over the back of Yaz’ fingers. It was almost like a nervous tick, but more.
“It seems like you’re doing alright to me.” Yaz said quietly. She looked up, almost startled.
“What do you mean?” She asked. Yaz smiled and picked up their hands, holding them up in front of her face. She looked almost surprised.
“Right. Well what if... you had to show someone, you know? Or seduce them?”
“Seduce?!”
“I don’t know the proper language! Woo, or, win over. How would you?” She asked. Yaz licked her lips, suddenly dry.
“I’d just say... I know it’s hard to believe, but I’ve been wondering for a long time if you would like to go out. And then, if they say yes, I would... ask to do something intimate. Like hold their hand.” Yaz said. She nodded, suddenly at a loss.
“But we’re already doing that.” She said quietly. She seemed to realize her slip-up as soon as Yaz’ eyes widened, but Yaz beat her to it.
“We could do something more. Like kiss.” She said. The Doctor nodded nervously.
“That would be nice. How would I-”
Yaz beat her to it. She leaned forward, and took the hand that wasn’t clasped tightly by her already, to tilt her face the right way. Then she captured her lips, and the Doctor slowly adjusted, shutting her eyes. Yaz smiled against her lips and pulled away.
“It’s you. I-I like-”
“I know.” Yaz chuckled, smiling at her red face. She adjusted the Doctors hair behind her ear, and looked back at the glimmering planet they were orbiting.
“I think you’ll do just fine.” Yaz said, looking back up at her. She was beaming.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.” Yaz smiled, squeezing her hand.