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The sound of train arriving made Seongwoo sigh in relief. He's been waiting for the train to come. Seongwoo just wanted to go home, shower, probably eat dinner, then rest in his cozy blanket.
Rest. To say sleep is too much. He probably can't sleep, again, for the nth times.
Today is a long day for him. His easily mad boss yelled at him because he accidentally put the wrong files on his desk.
Seongwoo held his bag and get on the train. It's not that packed up, lucky. He quickly sat and wait for the train to move. He glanced at man beside him. The man covered his body in red hoodie, his eyes closed and seems like he's sleeping.
Seongwoo sigh and smiled a little at the man beside him, oh he wish he could sleep right now. He's really tired, both physically and emotionally.
The train started to move minutes later. He sat there, trying his best to close his eyes. But he can’t sleep. Again and again, sigh left his lungs. He can't even count how many times did he sigh. Seongwoo was about to yawn when something bumped his shoulder. He glanced at his side, slightly annoyed.
It's the head of the man beside him. Maybe because the train jiggles a little that the man accidentally bump his head on Seongwoo’s shoulder. Seongwoo pretended not to be annoyed or uncomfortable as he straighten his position so the man could use his shoulder as a pillow.
It was fine, at first. The train jiggles, made the man's pink hair tickled Seongwoo’s neck. It starts to get really uncomfortable. He's thin and tired, the sleeping man's body weight on him is too much. He felt like his body could be crushed anytime. The one who need sleep is him. Seongwoo is beyond annoyed and exhausted.
“Excuse me...” Seongwoo whispered with his irritated voice. The train is going to arrive at his destination soon. He decided he won't let the cute man beside him sleep forever, he needs to wake up or else Seongwoo can't leave.
The train gets slower as loud voice from the speaker informed them that they'll arrive in a minute. Seongwoo shook the man's shoulder. “Excuse me, Sir? The train's arriving.”
He shook the man's shoulder really hard and much to his surprise, that man fell from where he sit. Seongwoo panicked, he and the other passengers gasped then quickly help the man. Seongwoo held the man's red jacket and felt guilty for pushing him too hard.
“Are you okay?”
“Can you get up, sir?”
“Oh god, poor man...”
Seongwoo gulped hearing the other passengers talking to the man. Seongwoo stared at the poor man who covered his face with his hands, clearly embarrassed. His face was as red as his jacket. Ah, right, he's pretty cute...
“I’m okay- ouch,” the man frowns when he tried to get up. “It’s okay. I just practiced really hard, yeah, don't worry.”
The other passengers finally smiled in relief as they left the poor man. Seongwoo sighed. He hand out the red jacket to the man.
“It’s yours, right?”
“Ah, yes! Thank you so much.” The other smiled really wide. He somehow remind Seongwoo to a Samoyed puppy. Seongwoo smiled and nodded his head.
The train's door slowly opened. Seongwoo bowed to the man, leave and head to his home as fast as he could. He’s really glad subway isn’t packed up at all.
Seongwoo walked to his apartment. It's a nice and clean apartment, his room may not that big but it's comfortable. Plus it’s far from the crowd. He inhaled the cold air when he saw his apartment approximately 300 meter away from where he stood.
His stomach growls angrily. It's so sudden. Seongwoo stopped his walking just to stare at his stomach and realized he didn’t eat at all since a slice of bread and a cup of tea that noon. He laugh at himself for forgetting to eat well. Guess he'll call delivery service because he's too tired to go to the minimarket.
He climb stairs to his apartment. There's an elevator, yes. But Seongwoo prefer to make himself tired, hoping he could sleep tonight.
Insomnia. He wish he doesn’t have it, his life would be a lot easier and he'll be happier. It started after he worked on this company. Is it because of the stress? But, the shitty company gives him high salary. He can't just get out and wander around to find a job. He just can't be a spontaneous person.
Seongwoo was confused seeing lights on his room. It's turned on. He is sure he turned off all lights source before he leave to work. He frowned and search for his keys in his pocket.
He stopped when he saw the number 96 on the door and laughed at himself. Wrong room. What's wrong with his eyes? His room is number 95, right next door is his apartment. He bowed at the door feeling apologetic to his neighbour.
His socks flew to the laundry basket, followed by his tie and coat as soon as he enter his apartment. He sighed and plopped his body to the sofa. Seongwoo groaned. He ordered chicken from his favourite chicken restaurant. He just need to wait patiently and his dinner will arrive.
Seongwoo went to shower to wash off his tiredness. After shower he didn’t dry his hair properly, it's fresh, in his opinion. Though water droplets might fall from his hair- but he put towel on his neck so it'll be fine and his pajamas won't get wet.
The raven jumped when his bell rang. The chicken is here!
He grab his wallet and opened the door, he smiled at the person that brought him the chicken. Just as the person leave, another apartment room's door is opened. The number 96.
Seongwoo sweated, remembering that he almost enter someone else's room. The raven stood there, he might as well greet his neighbour. Seongwoo never really see his neighbours since he's busy, and the person who live in number 96 is a newcomer. His neighbour came out. Pink haired boy with a red jacket.
Pink haired boy.
With a red jacket.
Seongwoo gasped seeing the face of his neighbour. The other also surprised that he stepped back a little. They stared at each other, making sure that they’re not mistaken.
“Good evening, so- you live here too?” Seongwoo stuttered. The other walk closer and gave him a handshake.
“Good evening, nice to meet you. I'm Kang Daniel. I'm so sorry about what happened in the train. I was really exhausted...” Daniel laughed in embarrassed tone. He bowed at Seongwoo.
“Nice to meet you, I'm Ong Seongwoo. It's okay, you looked so exhausted until you fell down, poor you...” Seongwoo giggled. He did felt annoyed, but this boy was really tired, he'll just let it go.
“Y-yeah I practiced dancing too hard.”
“Oh, I love dancing.” Seongwoo's eyes lit up when he heard dancing. Daniel nodded and laugh. Awkward. They just stare at each other and avert their gaze to something else whenever their eyes meet.
“S-so you're going to eat?” Daniel pointed at the box of chicken on Seongwoo's hand.
“Yeah. Ng, you're going somewhere?” Seongwoo held the box tighter and tilted his head.
“I’m going to a convenience store..., I’ll see you around, then.” The pink haired boy bowed at the raven. Seongwoo didn’t get in immediately, he kept on looking at Daniel's back until he disappeared. The raven's stomach growls.
He went in to eat the chicken. His mind still wanders to Daniel. The way Daniel's eye smiled, he can't forget it. Seongwoo sighed. Today was so eventful.
.
.
The raven opened his front door to breath the fresh air in the morning. He felt restless since he just sleep a little at night. He brought his cup of coffee and sip it slowly as he stare at the road.
People are walking with their friends or couple, some are jogging, some are dressed spectacularly probably they're going to a date. He enjoyed sipping coffee while looking at the road.
He heard sound of a door getting opened. He turn his head and found his neighbour in comfortable clothes. “Morning...”
“Good morning. The weather is nice today, you don't have to work?”
“No, it’s my day off. Where are you going?”
“My studio.”
Seongwoo mouthed 'cool' before he sip his coffee and emptied the cup. They both stand there awkwardly. Daniel locked his door. The raven glanced at him.
“You mentioned that you like dancing yesterday... Want to come to my studio?” Daniel scratched his neck as he wait for Seongwoo to answer. The raven chewed his lips. A studio. Sounds interesting.
“Would you wait for me, then?”
Daniel smiled and nod enthusiastically. “I'll wait here.”
Seongwoo ran inside his apartment, put his empty cup at the table, and change his clothes in flash. He stared at himself in the mirror. He really tried to hide his eye bags with specs. Will it work though? It's visible and anyone could tell that he lacks of sleep.
Well, nevermind. It's not like someone will stare at him and judge on how he need to sleep. Except his family and friends or some nosy old women at the train. Not everyone could sleep, susan.
He grab his wallet and phone. Daniel smiled when he finally came out of his apartment. Seongwoo locked his door. He stopped for a moment and glance at Daniel. “You sure? About me coming to your studio...”
“Yeah! W-why?” Daniel tilted his head. His hands sweating. He was scared of what Seongwoo think about him. Does he look suspicious? To ask his neighbour to come to his studio?
Seongwoo shook his head and smiled. “I'd like to see you dance but don't let that bother you.”
They both went to the subway. Seongwoo realized that the route to Daniel's studio is same as his office, but even further. He usually get down from the train at the second stop, but now he got down at the third. They need to walk for minutes to reach the studio.
“Do you dance?”
“Ah, I did popping in college days.” Seongwoo stuttered. The raven was surprised when the pink haired boy talked to him. It's not that he can’t socialize well. It's awkward for him to talk with someone he just met
“Popping? Cool!” Daniel showed his bright smile, which made Seongwoo look down, shy. This pink haired boy is seriously so cute.
“I used to dance a lot. I wanted to be a dancer or a model...”
“Dang! With that look, you should’ve work in idol or model industry!”
Seongwoo giggled seeing Daniel's reaction. He always listen well, giving reaction, making Seongwoo feels happy to talk.
“I’m stuck in office now..., and I can't just leave my job like that.” Seongwoo pouted. They keep walking until Daniel stopped and point at a small studio on the corner of the road.
The pink haired boy smiled as he pointed at the studio, “That’s my studio, Ataraxia.”
Seongwoo nodded. Ataraxia? Such an unique name. He never heard that word before. Does it even have a meaning?
They went inside. Daniel enthusiastically told Seongwoo the inside of it and the children that come every week to practice dancing with him. He's a new dance instructor. He told Seongwoo about the sofa that was broken, the slippery floor that he once slipped because of it, about him that cherish the studio so much.
Seongwoo find this boy is bubbly and interesting. The way his eyes smiled when he tell stories. Everything on him is so bright and captivating.
“Why is it Ataraxia?”
“Ataraxia is a state of freedom from emotional disturbance or anxiety,” Daniel smiled. “It’s a Greek philosophical term. For short, it's tranquility. I want my studio to be a place where everyone who dances here would feel free from their worry.”
Seongwoo opened his mouth in amazement. He bit his lips. Such a great word. He want to experience that state too. He want to be free from his insomnia.
“Do you have your Ataraxia?” Daniel noticed the change on Seongwoo’s face. The raven shook his head. The pink haired boy pat Seongwoo's back. “I’m sure you’ll find yours.”
“Thank you.” Seongwoo clasped his hands together. He show his wide smile, “While I'm here, I want to dance too!”
Seongwoo danced with Daniel, though it's mostly him watching Daniel did b-boy and modern dances. He laughed hard when Daniel accidentally make a weird face when he dance. Seongwoo had fun for the first time in months.
Somehow it's as if they know each other for years, they clicked well and quickly became close. They cleaned the place before leaving. Daniel told Seongwoo to sit down and let him clean the studio alone, however the raven insisted to help. Cleaning was never been this fun. Seongwoo himself feel surprised that he enjoy spending his time with his neighbour he just met yesterday.
It was past noon when they went home. Seongwoo gradually gets tired. He was drained. All he did for months was just sitting in his office, facing the monitor and doing his jobs. It's been so long since he danced.
They sit beside each other in the train. Seongwoo blinked his eyes few times. He felt sleepy. It’s weird. The raven would never sleep nor getting sleepy in public place. He touched his specs and remove it from his face, rubbed his eyes then wore it again.
Daniel was checking his phone when he noticed Seongwoo's head plopped onto his shoulder. He keep his phone and glance at the raven's locks. This man must be really exhausted...
Daniel became sad at the thought of Seongwoo hardly get any sleep. He saw those dark circles. His neighbour must've struggled just to simply sleep. He made sure that Seongwoo is comfortable and won’t hurt his neck when he wake up later.
The pink haired boy was getting more and more worry when the train arrived at their stop. He can't wake the raven up when he's sleeping soundly on his shoulder. When Daniel moved his hand to pat Seongwoo’s hands, the raven already opened his eyes when an information of them arriving from speaker is heard.
Seongwoo woke up surprised. He opened his mouth in shock and almost jumped from his seat. Daniel- seeing the other gets shocked like that, he can't help but to be surprised either. They stared at each other.
“This never happened before...” Seongwoo mumbled under his breath. He stepped out from the train, followed by confused Daniel. “T-this never happened before. I got sleepy when you’re right beside me!”
“Huh?”
“This must be it. My neighbour could cure my insomnia. But why? I need to know. Y-you...” Seongwoo paused. “Would you lend me your body?!”
“Eh?”
.
.
“Are you always trusting people this easily?”
“Why? Of course no.” Seongwoo let himself relax on Daniel's bed. He hugged the blanket and wait for Daniel to wash his face. The pink haired boy sighed, looking at the raven that love his blanket so much.
Seongwoo was right- about him be able to sleep when he's with Daniel. A month ago, when Seongwoo asked the pink haired boy to lend his body- to let the raven sleep in his room. Since he can't sleep, without Daniel.
“You came into my room, though. We were just neighbours. We didn't know each other that much...” Daniel tapped on his chin.
“I trust you.”
“Why?”
“Uh, because you hair is pink?”
“What kind of reason is that...” Daniel laughed. Seongwoo tilted his head and giggled. The raven snuggled to the blanket and shut his eyes. The pink haired boy sighed, feeling calm to see the view.
Seongwoo shutting his eyes, cheeks flushed because he probably just finished shower. It's just perfect. For Daniel, it was a magical fate to meet Seongwoo. Even if their first impression were funny. The guy who sleeps on the subway and fell down.
The pink haired boy joined Seongwoo. Looks like the raven is easily sleep these days. If compared from a month ago when they met for the first time, he looks happier and more lively. His dark circles on his eyes reduced. It made Daniel's heart flutter, to see Seongwoo's changing day by day. He smiles more, laughs more, his eyes sparkle.
He fell in love with the raven.
Daniel wants to see Seongwoo happy. This ethereal human being, sleeping peacefully, in his room. Though he was unsure about the raven. Like- he suddenly said that he got sleeping trouble and Daniel is his only hope. He doesn’t understand either why Seongwoo could sleep with him around. Does Seongwoo feel safe near him?
He chewed his lips as he get comfy and facing Seongwoo's sleeping face. He smiled. “I love you.”
He covered his mouth in instant. He didn’t expect it to come out of his lips. His face reddens. Seongwoo was asleep and his voice barely even louder than a whisper. Daniel held his breath as he brushed the raven’s lock.
“Sleep tight, Seongwoo.”
.
.
The next day, as usual, Seongwoo knocked on Daniel's apartment door. He nervously waited for his neighbour to open it. He was just dressed in a pajamas, with a sleeping mask on his head. He wondered why Daniel haven’t opened the door. For more than a month, the pink haired boy always open the door quickly. Seongwoo's eyes widened when Daniel finally opened his door, just in towel.
Water dripped from his hair, his face was still wet. Daniel held the towel that covered his lower body, scared it might fall suddenly because he didn’t have time to wear it properly.
“Whoa, I'm sorry. I just showered. Come in, come in~”
Daniel let Seongwoo come in. The raven tried to not look at Daniel's body. So ethereal, it's just perfect. No one could resist him. Seongwoo walk to the bed and throw himself on it. He distract himself by rolling into the blanket like a burrito. A giant human burrito.
Daniel wore a loose shirt, any trousers he could find, and quickly joined Seongwoo. He hugged the burrito so that Seongwoo trapped inside it.
“Daniel-“
“Yes baby?”
Seongwoo snorted hearing the blonde calling him baby. A baby. It must be true, since he needs Daniel's lullaby to sleep. He needs Daniel's warmth to drift off to dreamland.
“What are we?”
They both went silent. Clock's ticking filled the room.
“I'm pretty sure best friends don’t cuddle almost everyday. Or should I say everyday?” the raven pokes Daniel's cheek. His finger circled the chubby cheeks. His voice, rather than asking, it sounds like making sure of the fact that- best friends won't cuddle. Well, mostly.
“Probably?” Daniel gently stopped Seongwoo’s finger that has been circling his cheeks. He held the raven's hand. It was warm, and pretty sweaty. Funny. Because the room is cold, his air conditioner works really well. Seongwoo stared at him, his mouth slowly opened.
“Daniel, you know..., best friends wouldn’t whisper I love you when the other is asleep.”
“Ah.” Daniel covered his mouth in panic. His cheeks reddened. So, Seongwoo wasn’t asleep back then? So- Seongwoo heard it? His confession...?
The raven giggled seeing Daniel getting more and more flustered each second passed. Seongwoo stared at the pink haired boy.
“What am I to you though...”
“You're my definition of Ataraxia. The place where I feel calm and free.”
They went silent. Seongwoo bit his lips and played with his own fingers.
“Listen, I-I feel so warm with you. I could relax. I feel safe, and comfortable. As if we knew each other for years. I was scared that I might annoy you when I, uh, I force you to let me sleep in your apartment... Thank you so much. Because of you, I'm happier. Thank you.”
Daniel gasped before pulling Seongwoo into his arms. Seongwoo leaned in and nuzzled his head to Daniel's chest. He peek at the pink haired boy. Smiling cheekily before he close his eyes. Feeling safe and warm in Daniel's arm. He whispered,
“I love you, Nielie.”