Work Text:
Even though Natalie is well aware she is almost 20, and as such she should get married and start having babies with a man her father chose for her (since she hasn't found any suitable options herself), she knows she doesn't want to be set up with some strange man she doesn't know. But it's not until she discusses her situation over with Isabelle that she realizes the truth:
She doesn't want a husband of any kind. She can't see herself ever finding a man she could be with, with the requered and expected emotional and physical intimacy, can't see herself spending her life with one. She doesn't want any man.
She is well aware of everything that comes with marriage, and she finds herself put off by the very thought of children and companionship and *sex*. She has been fine without all of these for her whole life, and doesn't see it changing.
So, Natalie runs off with Isabella to Eriga and hopes her father might forgive her some day. But she will never fulfill his expectations in this matter.
She will live her life the way she wants to, and that doesn't include a husband.
***
While Natalie is separated from Isabella on account of the local menstruation related ritual, were women are isolated in an abgan for the duration, and their work is temporarily on hold, Natalie has time for further considerations of her situation.
She doesn't want men as anything but friends. She also enjoys the company of women, but she is not quite sure if it is the same way she enjoys men or whether she might enjoy women as romantic companionship. Until she was able to properly classify her feelings about men, she hadn't really even considered how she might feel about women, except for an idle thought here and there.
Living among the women of the palace, she sees things she hadn't even considered before. Sometimes the co-wives share... marital affection with each other.
Natalie know this was something people might do if they were so inclined, and she understands the situation of the co-wives. She wonders whether this is the answer that had eluded her before. Perhaps she didn't want a husband because she wanted a wife (well, close enough).
While there are some language barriers between her and the other women, Natalie does get to know some of them while she spends her idle days.
One of them shows interest in her, a beautiful woman with dark skin typical to her people, named Akwete, and while Natalie is not quite sure what she feels, she decides to share a kiss with the woman. She explains her situation as best she can, and Akwete accepts the situation.
The kiss they share is quite lovely, but Natalie doesn't think it makes her feel the way it should. It doesn't change anything for her.
Natalie is apologetic when she explains the situation to Akwete, who is understanding. Considering their different worlds, and the nature of Natalie's work, nothing would have come of them anyway. But they could have shared something together before their time was over.
But that's not who Natalie is. She enjoys the friendly company of men and women but nothing else. She's not quite sure whether Isabella's life is for her either, but she'll find something. She'll become a sprinster, and she will wear that title with pride.