Work Text:
Too many lights, too much noise. I chuckle to myself as I head towards the bar in Purgatory to get everyone another round of drinks. I once told Shepard that's how I felt about Chora's Den, back when we were on the original Normandy. Chora's Den has nothing on Purgatory. I'm keeping it together pretty well though. My headaches have decreased in frequency since I got out of Huerta Memorial; it seems all those nasty concoctions that doctor was shoving down my throat did some good. Three years ago I probably couldn't have spent more than a half hour in this place without a blinding migraine and now I'm going on hour two of my bachelor party without a problem.
It's three weeks before the wedding and no matter how hard I tried I could not get Jack and Joker to throw a joint party. In fact, the closest I came was getting them to agree to have them on the same night. I'm also pretty sure the only way I managed that was so Jack could be positive I wouldn't crash Shepard's party. Which, to be honest, I probably would have. It's not that I don't trust Angel, really, it isnt. It's that I don't trust Jack.
A shout of laughter from behind me makes me smile as I reach the bar and order another two rounds for our table(we're going to need them). I'm glad the guys are having a good time. Joker was pretty ticked when he realized I was sticking to my guns about our... entertainment. After a few heated discussions(at least on Joker's part) we agreed on Purgatory. For me because the Asari here aren't technically strippers and for Joker because they might as well be.
We're up on the second floor which seems to have been designated as some sort of boy's club for the night. There's cigar smoke, raucous laughter, and Asari dancers wending their way through the crowd. For the most part the latter have left me alone. I'm guessing the warning Joker gave last time I was here has spread and that's fine by me. Shepard has promised me a private strip show later that I'm quite looking forward to. The bartender says he'll send the drinks over and I head back to our table just in time to hear Joker recounting the day I met Angel.
"So what does he do? He knocks her over!" I knew he had been spying on me.
"Laugh it up guys," I say as I slide into my seat. "I'm still the one marrying her."
"Though I'm not sure why," says Wrex, reaching for his ryncol. "A Krogan female would never mate with a man she could best in combat."
"Yeah, but if Shepard went by that rule she'd never get married," chimes in Cortez. Wrex ponders this for a moment before nodding.
"You've got a point."
"So, Kaidan, how does it feel knowing your soon to be wife can kick your ass?" asks James with a smirk. I raise an eyebrow at him.
"At least after she lays me out, Lieutenant, she takes me to bed to make it feel better." The resulting laughter is deafening from all but Vega. He seems about to try and make a comeback but Cortez stops him.
"Let it go, man. He's got you there." James seems to admit defeat and takes a pull from his beer.
"Is this what a normal night is like for the upper deck crew?" asks Donnelly, already well into his cups. "I need to tag along more often."
"Don't worry," voices Garrus, moving to make room for the drinks the waitress is now bringing over, "you're not missing much. It's normally just talk about kill counts and the latest weapons."
"Speaking of weapons, did you guys see that new shotgun over at Armax Arsenal?" asks James, getting excited.
"The one that increases damage and accuracy without sacrificing capacity? Yeah," says Wrex. "I was looking at ordering-"
"No, no, no!" cuts off Joker. "This is a bachelor party, no work talk allowed. You're setting a bad example for Javik about how these things work." The Prothean in question looks down his nose at Joker, which is hard to do since he technically doesn't have a nose.
"Our time would be better spent discussing weapons, primitive." Joker sighs in disgust.
"Oh come on. The only things on our minds tonight should be alcohol, cigars, and women."
"Speaking of women," says Wrex, nodding towards the entrance on the ground floor behind us, "look who just walked in."
Purgatory is on fire tonight! Or maybe I'm just still a bit buzzed from the drinks we had back at the apartment. I may have been a bit apprehensive about Jack planning this party, but I have to admit I'm having a fantastic time.
No sooner had Kaidan walked out the door to meet Joker and the guys than Jack walked right back through it. She was in her typical combat pants and leather jacket, but I can't honestly imagine her in anything different. She apparently doesn't feel the same about my wardrobe. She tossed a bag at me.
"This is what you're wearing tonight. Hurry up and change, the party starts in half an hour." She moved towards the bar and started pulling bottles of alcohol out of the other bags. When she realized I was still standing there she turned and glared at me. "Move your ass, Shepard!" I laughed and went upstairs to change.
When I came back down 20 minutes later I was dressed decidedly more provocatively. The dress Jack chose for me was white, I guess to denote that I'm the bride though there was nothing else bridal about it. It's strapless, leaving my shoulders completely bare, and falls to mid-thigh. The center of it reminds me of those dresses the Asari love with the triangles up from your hips and down from your chest to meet in the middle, leaving small patches of skin bare. In my case, however, it leaves large patches of skin bare since there's no extra fabric to cover my sides. Jack grinned and handed me an Appletini. I raised an eyebrow at her.
"Really, Jack? This is what I'm wearing tonight?" She nodded at me with a wicked grin.
"For the record, this is what I think your wedding dress should look like." I chuckled and took a sip of my drink.
"Then won't it be bad luck to let Kaidan see it?" Jack rolled her eyes.
"There's no way that pussy dress designer is going to put you in anything like this." The doorbell rang and Jack went to answer it.
"And thank God for that," I muttered, setting down my drink and following after her. The door opened to show Liara standing on the other side of it. She took in my outfit and smirked.
"Let me guess, Jack picked it out?" I smiled back.
"How'd you guess?" She pulled out a pair of shoes from behind her back and handed them to me.
"I was in charge of finding matching heels." Before long we were joined by Gabby, then Traynor, Kasumi, and finally Miranda.
"Rebuilding Horizon is going rather well," she told us over drinks in the living room. "I'm taking the next three weeks off to be here and then, who knows? Ori and I are thinking about settling down there." Jack snorted but we were saved her sarcastic comment by an incoming call on her omnitool. She took it in the kitchen but the distance didn't keep us from hearing her swearing at the unlucky person on the other end of the line.
"You have two hours, two fucking hours, are we clear?" she demanded, walking back towards us and ending the call.
"Problem?" I asked, taking a sip from my second drink of the night.
"That was the stripper company. Their guys are running late so we're having a change of plans."
"Strippers?" asked Gabby, sounding surprised. She turned to me. "Kaidan's all right with you having strippers?" I shrugged.
"Not particularly, but with Jack planning the party there's not much anyone could do."
"Anyway," interrupted Jack pointedly, "this just means our schedule gets flipped around. We're going to Purgatory first and having the strippers second, which should make it easier to take one home with me tonight anyway. So get your shit together ladies and let's go. And Shepard," she added as I stood up, "wear the heels."
"What am I, a life sized doll?" I grumbled.
"Hey, what you and Kaidan do in your own time is your business. For tonight, though, put on the damn heels." I was shutting off the lights in preparation to leave when the doorbell rang again.
"Hey Jack, looks like the strippers are here after all!" called Kasumi, opening the door. She was wrong. The person on the other side of the door was someone much more familiar, but one I hadn't expected to see.
"Hey," she said, somewhat nervously. "Am I too late for the party?"
I stand up and look over the balcony to see who Wrex is talking about and, lo and behold, in walks Shepard and the girls. And holy hell, Angel looks amazing. I have no idea where she got that dress but I plan to thoroughly enjoy stripping it off her later tonight. Joker comes up behind me and groans.
"Damn it, Jack! They aren't supposed to be here until after we leave." I smile down at my fiance, a wicked idea entering my head. I create a small biotic field between her thigh and dress, flipping up her skirt a tiny bit. She immediately pushes it back down and looks around for me, recognizing the feel of my biotic signature on her skin. Her eyes meet mine and she lights up. I grin down at her. Damn, I love this woman. She raises her hand to wave but Miranda stops her, shaking her head and saying something that makes Shepard laugh. Shepard shrugs up at me before heading to the dance floor.
"Are the girls here, too?" asks Garrus, pushing away from the table and joining us at the balcony. He surveys the group as it comes through the door and suddenly stiffens. I follow his line of sight and must admit I'm surprised as well. Is that-
"Tali?" he asks in a hoarse voice. I smile. It seems like the night is looking up.