Chapter Text
A gentle sigh escaped your lips as the crisp cool air blew your hair back. Today, like many days for you, had been quite boring. You weren’t a Jedi, but you worked closely with the younglings. Mostly making sure all of their needs were taken care of, and it was a pretty tough job. Especially with the Clone Wars, and you feared the Galaxy may never be the same again. Enough with those thoughts though, because you wanted your mind to be clear when you met with Master Kenobi.
Over the years of knowing him, you had begun to grow fond over the man. It wasn’t long until a crush started to form, and your cheeks turned a bright pink whenever he spoke your name. You knew romance was against the Jedi Code, so Obi-Wan Kenobi could never truly be yours, but you just couldn’t help yourself. The man was a natural flirt, whether he knew it or not. As you entered the building, you shed your jacket and draped it over your arm. There actually was some purpose to your meeting with the Jedi Master, you were delivering some papers Yoda had wanted him to look over quickly.
You quickly had found your way to his bedroom, and lightly knocked on the door. “Come in!” You heard him say, surprised that he even heard the knock. Your heart began speeding up, as you reminded yourself you had seen him countless times trying to calm yourself down. “Oh, hello Y/N, what a nice surprise!” Obi-Wan said with a smile, standing up to greet you.
Soon enough, you felt his warm familiar embrace, wishing you could stay like that forever. But as quickly as it had happened, it had ended. “What brings you over here, everything alright?” He asked you, motioning to sit over on the couch.
Hanging your jacket up, you quickly go to sit beside him. “Of course Obi-Wan, everything is great. Master Yoda asked for me to drop these papers off to you. He mentioned that it would be important for the meeting tomorrow.” You told him, handing over the papers. You had liked him for quite a while, but you had learned how to hide it pretty well.
“Thank you, these are definitely going to come in handy.” The man said with a grin, setting the papers on his coffee table. “Why don’t you stay, I haven’t seen you in ages, and I would love to catch up with you,” Obi-Wan said, noticing you had positioned yourself to get up.
For a brief second, you had looked panicked, you had wanted to chat with the man, but the sooner you got out of there, the better. So badly you wanted to crash your lips against his, claiming him as your own. But that was impossible, for it would mean him having to leave the life he so loved. Obi-Wan was proud to be a Jedi Master, and hold a seat on the Council. He was an excellent Jedi, and led his troops like no other she had seen. So how could you possibly ask him to give up such a huge part of himself just for you? So even if he had liked you back, you would never know.
“Of course, but I must tell you, not much has happened. My days are starting to blend together, and I am afraid this war won’t end. I miss all of the travelings that I used to do. Now it is rather dangerous to go anywhere that isn’t under the Republic.” You tell him, brushing a hand through your hair.
“That is definitely understandable, and we hope to resolve this war as soon as we can,” Obi-Wan tells you, trying to reassure you.
The two of you talked for a while, long enough for the sun to set on Coruscant, and for stars to litter the night sky. If only you could be honest about your feelings, if only you could tell him how much he really meant to you. If only you knew how Obi-Wan truly felt. How he tried so hard to get you out of his thoughts, something the Jedi teachings warned him against.
Obi-Wan did carry the same feelings you had, but he knew he could never share them. He knew that eventually, you would find someone, someone who could actually be with you and love you. A thought he had more often than not. He thought if he could push you away, the feelings would vanish. But even as he was gone on missions, he thought of you. Each time he saw you after a long period of time, those thoughts and feelings came rushing back as well. He wanted to tell you all of those things, but he just could never find the right words. Though he supposed your friendship was better than nothing but was it really?
You wondered how long this could go on, this charade you played. It was only a matter of time before you confessed your feelings, and you knew that it would just be devastating for you. Yet you still wanted to tell him, because you had a small sliver of hope that maybe, just maybe, the two of you could work it out.
When you noticed how late it was, you slowly began to stand up, stretching your limbs. “Well, I should head home, I am getting rather tired. This has been really nice Obi-Wan.” You tell him, as he walks you to the door.
“It has, why don’t we meet for lunch tomorrow after my meeting? It would definitely do me good to get some food in my system.” He tells you, watching as you put your jacket on.
“Of course, I would love to.” You exclaim with a smile, hovering a little longer. Wanting, wishing, for you to gain some courage. Something, anything, just enough to tell him your feelings. You don’t, but you settle for a goodbye hug as you slowly make your way back to your apartment. Maybe tomorrow would be a different day.