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Gon first meets Killua Zoldyck without knowing who he is.
He knows the Zoldycks, of course. Everyone does. They’re one of the more influential figures in the Kingdom, just a few of Aunt Mito’s many advisors. Gon has seen Silva and Kikyo Zoldyck on occasion passing through the Castle’s walls, pale as ghosts and cold enough, too. Gon had talked to them once or twice during meetings Aunt Mito would force him to sit through, or maybe during an important party. But he never really paid them any more attention than he did Aunt Mito’s warnings about the dangers of leaving the Castle.
Killua was different, though; Killua was a comet, bright and beautiful and breathtaking all at once as he crashed head-first into Gon’s life. When Gon met Killua, his world turned upside down. Killua blinded Gon with his brilliance and once they met, Gon couldn’t look anywhere else.
-o0o-
Gon groans, dropping his head onto his knees.
He’s sitting on a bench propped up next to one of the arching windows showing off the courtyard, his legs pressed to his chest as he tries and fails to solve the latest of Tutor Wing’s math equations. They’re impossible to solve, he’s sure of it. He’s tried seven different ways to get the right answer, and yet he still can’t—
“What’s wrong?” a drawling voice calls out, shocking Gon who had been in the room for the better part of an hour with no one to bother him.
When Gon looks up, there’s another teen about his age leaning against the open doorway. He’s got a curled mess of stunning silver hair, and sharp blue eyes Gon can spot even from all the way over here. Gon doesn’t recognize him. But then again, Gon so rarely talks to anyone his age besides Zushi.
The boy cocks his head as Gon continues to stare at him. “What?” the boy asks, sounding bored. “Does the future heir and only prince of Whale Island not talk?”
Gon’s cheeks heat up. “I can, too!”
“Oh, good.” The boy pushes himself off the doorframe and shoves his hands in his pockets. He’s not so much looking at Gon as he is studying him. He doesn’t seem impressed. “It would be pretty disappointing if our Kingdom’s future rested on the shoulders of a kid who couldn’t talk.”
Other people might be insulted by the teen’s bluntness. But Gon isn’t; he’s just curious. “Who are you?”
“Killua.” The teen’s answer is short. Impersonal. “Killua Zoldyck.”
Gon blinks. Zoldyck? He’d always known the Zoldycks had lots of kids...was this teen really one of them?
“Know who I am now?” the boy—Killua—asks and Gon nods.
“Yeah. Your parents are advisors.” He frowns. It makes sense that Lord and Lady Zoldyck are here. But— “But why are you here?”
Killua shrugs. He slowly starts walking towards Gon, letting his gaze wander around the room—over the faces of portraits with names Gon can’t remember to save his life, over the glittering chandeliers and floors so shiny that Killua’s reflection looks back at him. Gon doesn’t know what he’s looking for. Killua’s gaze remains unimpressed, and Gon doesn’t blame him. Every room in the Castle looks like this one.
“My parents had some meetings,” Killua says finally. “And I got bored. So I decided to go exploring.”
“And then you found me,” Gon says and Killua’s blue gaze lands on him.
“Yeah. And then I found you, whining and groaning like the world was ending.”
Gon wrinkles his nose. “It might as well be,” he grumbles and turns back to the book Tutor Wing had given him yesterday. There’s scribbles of Gon’s own handwriting all over the pages. None of them make any sense, not even to Gon.
Killua snorts. “And why is that? Life can’t be that bad for you, you’re the prince.”
Gon holds his math book out to Killua without another word. Killua takes another step closer, until he’s only a foot away from Gon, and takes it. His blue eyes scan Gon’s writing and Tutor Wing’s questions with lightning speed.
“...really? Math is why you were making so much noise?”
Gon huffs at Killua incredulousness. “Yeah! Math is really hard—”
“Only for idiots,” Killua retorts and Gon bristles. “Do you really not get this stuff? I could help you, you know.”
The anger washes out of Gon in a second. “You—w-what? Really?” He hadn’t expected that, especially not from the person who was prickly and bored and insulted Gon for not getting what only idiots didn’t get.
“Yeah, really.” Killua sits down next to Gon on the bench and the sunlight illuminates Killua’s hair like a silver halo. “‘S not like I have anything better to do right now.”
So Killua stays, and Killua helps. He makes sense of the nonsense in Gon’s books, only rolling his eyes when Gon asks a stupid question or two. Mostly though Killua makes Gon laugh with little stories to explain numbers and when his phone buzzes and he has to go, Gon watches Killua’s back disappears around the corner with a twinge of regret.
-o0o-
Gon sees Killua next in the Market a week later.
He recognizes him from the shine of his white hair, spots it out even in the bustle of the crowd and the hum of chatter drifting through the air.
“Killua!” he shouts excitedly, loud enough that several people turn, including Killua himself.
Gon sees the confusion in Killua’s face, quickly followed by shock and finally by wariness. He does come over though, neatly and gracefully ducking around strangers to get to Gon’s side.
“...Gon?” he says, like he doesn’t know who Gon is, but Gon beams at him anyway. “What are you doing here?”
“Hm?” Gon tilts his head to the side. He’s happy to see Killua again—he’d honestly believed that the last time he saw Killua would be the last time he saw Killua—but he doesn’t understand what the other teen is asking him. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, shouldn’t you be practicing your math or something? Up in the Castle?”
Gon sticks his tongue out at Killua for the math comment. “Ha, funny Killua...My Tutor was so impressed with my latest homework that he let me off for the rest of the day while his other student catchest up!” Gon tries not to think too hard about poor Zushi pouring over his books. Gon might not be amazing in his studies, but he was at least a little better than Zushi. “And I don’t spend all my time in the Castle, you know.”
He turns to accept some change from the lady he’d just bought fruit from, giving her a dazzling smile and a word of thanks. Killua is watching him skeptically when he faces him once more.
“Isn’t that what you should be doing though?” Killua asks, walking at Gon’s side as the two of them head down the road. “Staying in the Castle will keep you safe from assassins and all that.”
Gon eyes Killua and fights down a grin. “What’re you trying to say Ki-llu-a? Are you an assassin hunting me down? You gonna kidnap me?”
Killua scoffs, rolling his eyes. “As if. If I really wanted to kidnap you I would’ve done it the last time we met. You were totally defenseless.”
“Hmm,” Gon makes a noncommittal sound. He wasn’t totally defenseless, not now nor the last time they met. At least today he’s wearing a hat to make him less noticeable, squishing down his classic-Freecss spikes and covering his uniquely gold eyes. And he’s pretty strong even on his own. Gon doesn’t know how strong Killua is, but Gon had been trained to fight for as long as he could remember. He could probably take Killua on.
“Well, what are /you/ doing here?” he asks and Killua looks at him, frowning. “Are you buying stuff for your parents?”
Killua’s frown deepens. “No way. We have servants for that stuff.”
‘Oh.’ Gon bites the inside of his cheek. ‘Right. The Zoldycks are rich, too.’
“I’m…” Killua speaks again in a hesitating voice. “I’m here for the same reason as you, actually. To get away from it all.”
He tucks his hands behind his head and looks away awkwardly. Gon stares at Killua, eyes wide. He hadn’t been expecting such an honest answer. Did Killua not like his family?
Now that he thought about it, the Zoldycks always seemed like cold, calculating kind of people. And while Killua was very calculating—and brilliant and beautiful—he wasn’t cold. He had helped Gon last time without expecting anything in return. And now Gon wanted to help him.
“...does that mean you aren’t buying anything from the Market?” Gon asked.
Killua’s head swings around to look at him again. His brows are furrowed as he says, “Why do you care?”
Gon shrugs. “Just curious if you wanted anything. I could buy something if you really liked it!”
“I don’t need you to buy me—”
“I know!” Gon rushes to say. He hadn’t meant to insult Killua. “I mean, I’d like to buy you something. As a thank you.”
Killua stares at him for a few long seconds. The silence would probably bother anyone else, but it doesn’t bother Gon. He’s lived in silence for most of his life. No one lives in the Castle besides him and his Aunt, after all. The servants come and go in the morning at night, but then it’s just them two.
But finally, a slight smile cracks through Killua’s mask. Like a flower growing in a crack of cement. “You’re weird, Gon.”
It doesn’t feel so much like an insult. If anything, Killua’s smile turns it into a compliment and Gon feels his heart do a little stutter at the curve of Killua’s lips. Killua looks nice, smiling like that.
“I mean it though,” Gon insists as the two of them turn a corner. Ahead of them is a large fountain with bubbling water and dramatic architecture. It’s the center of the Market and a nice place to sit and relax. Gon has to raise his voice so Killua can hear him over the water’s roar and the larger crowd, “Isn’t there anything you want?”
Killua huffs, his bangs blowing off his forehead for a brief moment. “I—I don’t need anything, really.”
“But—”
“Gon,” Killua cuts him off, quiet and firm. “Listen. Friends don’t thank friends. You don’t need to get me anything.”
Killua’s words cause something warm to settle in Gon’s chest. It flutters and swoops, and a grin spreads across Gon’s face before he’s even aware he’s smiling.
A friend. Killua is his friend.
“A gift, then,” he amends. “Not as a thank you, just because I want to give you something.”
“Hm.” Killua looks around the square before his eyes settle on something on the other side of the fountain. Gon follows his gaze and sees a specialty sweet stand with every kind of chocolate known to man.
Gon’s grin widens. “Chocolate? Is that what you want?”
“Uh.” Killua’s cheeks turn a light pink, to Gon’s delight.
“I’ll take that as a yes.” He grabs Killua’s cool hand in his, and tugs him off towards the stand.
-o0o-
He and Killua swap numbers before they say goodbye at the Market. Killua has a snapchat with the username ‘chocorolightning’ and Gon laughs the first time he reads it. The first picture he sends Killua is a snap of his new math homework and the word ‘H E L P’.
The first picture Killua sends is of chocolate. And that doesn’t surprise Gon as much as it surprises Tutor Wing when Gon bursts into giggles in the middle of a lecture.
Killua sends Gon lots of pictures over the next few weeks. Lots of them are blurry pictures of an empty mansion, butlers’ coattails and grey skies. Others are of his family: needles and a half-empty bag of chips that belong to his older siblings, dolls and fans for his younger siblings. Killua is the middle child, Gon learns quickly, and the preferred heir despite his youth.
Killua never mentions how he hates his home, or his family. But Gon can tell. Killua’s texts always have a hint of longing in them, one that echoes in Gon’s bones. Because if there’s one thing they both want more than anything, it’s to leave their duties and homes behind and go far, far away. They’re both princes, in their respective realms, and neither of them want the role they were born into.
Gon sends Killua pictures, too. He sends a picture of Tutor Wing with his shirt half untucked, Zushi’s red face as the other boy blushes under the gaze of Gon’s camera. He takes silly selfies because he wants to make Killua laugh while he’s stuck in a place he wishes he wasn’t.
One time, he sends Killua pictures of the flowers the maids put in his room—lilacs—because they remind him of Killua, somehow. The next day Killua sends him back a picture of bright, beautiful, marigolds.
-o0o-
“Are your eyes open?”
Gon hears Killua make a huffing sound even from across the room. “No. You told me not to peak, why would my eyes be open?”
Gon grins to himself—Killua can’t see him, after all—and yells back, “Good! Just stay standing there for a few minutes!”
Gon hears more than sees Killua rolling in eyes. “S‘not like I’m going anywhere...”
Gon doesn’t bother answering that. Killua being grumpy is mostly a facade, the other teen usually being more than willing to partake in any of the prince’s schemes. That’s one thing he loves about Killua: how willing he is to try new things.
It’s easy for Gon to pick out the items he wants out of his closet. His closet is almost the size of his bedroom, though he’s never been one for clothes. A lot of the stuff in here are uniforms or crowns or metals that Gon needs to wear for special ceremonies. Normally he never goes in here. But today is different, because Killua is here, and Gon has planned out the things he wants Killua to try on for at least a week now.
Killua will look pretty in anything, Gon is sure. But he wanted to pick out something special for Killua to try on—because Killua is special, and he deserves to be treated as such.
Gon comes out into his room’s sitting area a few minutes later, his arms full. Killua is sitting exactly where Gon left him, on a stool in the middle of the carpet with his eyes closed and his lips twisted into an impatient scowl as he waits for Gon to return.
Gon has to bite the inside of his cheek to keep himself from giggling. Killua looks cute, he can’t help it—
“I can hear you snickering,” Killua says dryly and Gon’s jaw drops.
“Wha—how!”
“Because you are as subtle as glass shattering. Hurry up and do what you have to do already instead of laughing to yourself! I don’t want to sit here all day!”
“Why not?” Gon moves behind the other teen and carefully sets the jewels on the couch. “Do you have special plans later, Ki-llu-a?”
“Maybe I do.”
Gon frowns. “I thought you wanted to spend the day with me?”
“Exactly, stupid.”
His cheeks warm as it suddenly dawns on Gon that Killua’s special plans were him. “Oh.”
“Mhm,” Killua hums and it sounds like he’s trying hard not to laugh.
“W-Well, this won’t take too long!” Gon promises. He grabs a special royal blue cape encrusted with rare gems and fur and throws it around Killua’s shoulders. He feels Killua stiffen under his fingers as Gon works to fasten the clasp.
“Gon. What are you—“
“No peeking!” Gon says stubbornly. “You’ll see soon, just sit still for now, okay?”
Killua wrinkles his nose—‘Cute,’ Gon thinks—but does as he’s told. He lets Gon add a sapphire necklace to his neck and a matching bracelet and ring. He takes the scepter that Gon hands him, carefully curling his fingers around it as if knowing how important it is. And he barely breathes as Gon sets a glittering crown on his beautiful silver curls.
“Okay,” Gon says and takes Killua’s free hand to help him stand. “Almost there, Killua.”
“I’m guessing I can’t open my eyes yet?”
“Nope! Not yet. Almost though, I promise.”
Killua doesn’t say anything. Just lets Gon lead him around his room until they’re both standing in front of a floor-to-ceiling length mirror. Not that Killua knows that when Gon brings him to a stop, but he will soon.
“Okay.” Gon squeezes Killua’s cool hand, heart thumping erratically at the sight of Killua in official royal attire. “You—You can open your eyes now.”
Killua does as he’s told. His electric blue eyes flutter open and lock on his reflection. For a few long seconds, he simply stares. Gon can’t tell what Killua is thinking behind large eyes and the white-knuckled fist that’s gripping the scepter like his life depends on it. But he hopes Killua is just awestruck as he is. Because seeing Killua like this...he looks...
He looks stunning. He looks like he was born to wear the royal drab, and for a split second Gon lets his mind wander; he pictures himself and Killua, side by side, hand in hand. Older, more mature. But both wearing royal clothes and both happy. United as they face the kingdom and its future together.
Gon can’t stop himself from reaching out then and lacing his fingers with Killua’s. Killua looks at him with his blue eyes and Gon’s heart stutters in his chest. It’s still hard to tell exactly what Killua is thinking, but he returns Gon’s squeeze with bruising force.
They look in the mirror together, hand-in-hand and wordless. Because some things are too big to say with words, and that’s okay.
“You look really pretty,” Gon says and his voice comes out all strange: hoarse and tight. Strange.
Killua turns three shades darker and punches Gon in the shoulder with his free hand.
“Ow—Killua!” Gon whines. The punch hurts, not terribly but enough for it to sting. “Why’d you do that for?”
“You can’t call your friends pretty, stupid!” Killua hisses back at him, still red as a sky during sunset.
“But I just did? I wasn’t lying, either! I think you look really nice, Killua.”
Killua looks like he’s about to explode. But he’s still holding onto Gon’s hand, his nails digging into Gon’s skin like he’ll drown if he lets go, and Gon still thinks Killua is the most amazing person he’s ever met or ever seen.
He doesn’t think he will ever forget the image of Killua and him standing together in the mirror. Somehow he knows it’s something he’ll remember for the rest of his life.
-o0o-
It’s a month after Gon and Killua first met. That morning, Gon wakes to find a snap from Killua—it’s a picture of the Castle gates, the only way anyone is allowed inside the Castle these days.
It makes Gon shoot up in bed, heart thudding rapidly. If Killua sent this, it must mean he’s come to visit again. And if he’s here, inside the Castle—
Then Gon can find him.
Gon changes and sprints out of his bedroom in record time. He doesn’t stop for the breakfast that’s been prepared for him, because Killua is here, and Gon wants to see him the same way someone stares up at the nights sky hoping for a shooting star.
‘Where are you?’ Gon sends back as he hastily rushes through the halls. His shoes squeak against the shiny patterned tiles and his breath is loud in his ears. His heart does a funny leap when Killua sends him back another picture, this time of the greeting room right outside of Aunt Mito’s private chambers.
Gon turns on his heel and runs in the opposite direction. He reaches the room of Killua’s picture in record time, and Gon skids to a halt just outside of the doorway. His chest is heaving, face warm. He quickly fixes his hair in a nearby mirror that’s hanging on the wall, then quietly—quietly—pulls open the door.
Killua is standing there, in the middle of the room. His head is bent with silver bangs falling into his face as he taps away at his phone. He’s wearing something a lot fancier than the last time Gon had seen him: a button-down blue shirt, dress pants and sharp-looking shoes. He looks good. So good, that Gon simply stares for a few moments. The color of his shirt matches Killua’s eyes, makes his skin stand out nicely.
Swallowing thickly, Gon lifts his phone and takes a snap of Killua. He sends it without any text, and waits.
He can tell when Killua receives the text by the way he suddenly stiffens, back straightening and shoulders bunching together defensively. Killua whips around and his blue eyes grow even larger as they spot Gon. A smile splits across Killua’s face—big and genuine and brilliant—and then he’s taking off towards Gon in a sprint.
Gon holds out his hand, a returning beam stretching his lips, and Killua grabs it without hesitation. Gon leads the way down the different paths inside the Castle, taking random lefts and sharp turns that leaves them both stumbling. Gon doesn’t know where they’re going, just that he wants to get away, and he doesn’t care where they end up. As long as Killua is by his side, anything seems possible.
They finally come to a stop after what seems like miles of running. Gon slows down until Killua is bumping into his back, laughter tumbling from his lips and his pale cheeks flushed from running. Gon grins back, grabs Killua’s other hand and laughs along with him. Their foreheads bump, and then Gon is staring into endless pools of blue.
The sight makes the laughter lodge in his throat and all the air leave his lungs. He feels like time has frozen and his world is narrowing, focusing, on silvery bangs and that brilliant smile, the cool, long fingers wrapped tightly around his.
Killua is staring at him too, now. There’s something wondrous and quiet in his gaze, something Gon can’t quite place but yearns to know all the same. Does Killua feel the same lurch in his chest that Gon feels when he looks at Killua?
Gon carefully lifts their interlocked hands. He brushes back Killua’s bangs with their intertwined fingers, and the blush across Killua’s cheeks darkens every so slightly. The lurch becomes a stutter and a twist, and Gon needs something—but what—?
Killua sucks in a quiet breath and Gon’s eyes dart down to his lips.
Oh.
“H-Hey,” Gon whispers as a giddy nervousness crawls up his throat. “Hey. Killua.”
“Yeah?” Killua breathes back with round eyes.
“Can I try something?”
Killua nods, his head moving up and down in jerks. His hands tighten around Gon’s, and for a moment Gon thinks he can feel Killua’s pulse quickening to match his own.
So Gon leans forward, carefully, slowly. His face grows closer and closer to Killua’s until he can feel Killua’s breath brushing his lips, see every white eyelash and count every near-invisible freckle spreading across a narrow nose.
But then his own eyes flutter shut and he presses his mouth to Killua’s. It’s a gentle touch of lips against lips. It’s innocent, but Killua’s nails are digging into his skin like he never wants to let go, and Gon’s heart is pounding so hard it makes his head spin in dizzying circles.
He’s never felt like this for anyone he’s ever kissed before. Killua is special, unique, and Gon doesn’t want to let him go.
They pull back, for half a second. The pause is just long enough for Gon to see the scarlet hue of Killua’s now heavy blush, the flicker of blue eyes under hooded eyelids, and it makes Gon want.
He tugs his hands out of Killua’s to cup Killua’s jaw and neck. He pulls Killua back to him, crushes the other’s lips and body to his, because suddenly he needs to feel Killua like he needs to breathe. Killua melts and curves into him and winds his arms around Gon’s waist to hug him in turn. He tilts his head and that allows Gon to deepen the kiss, so that’s what he does.
He wants to drink Killua in. He wants to have the taste of Killua’s tongue in his mouth forever, to never forget how the other feels against him. He digs his fingers into Killua’s smooth cheeks as if his hold alone can keep Killua here, with him. Killua doesn’t seem to mind the sudden intensity of Gon’s kiss; his fingers are twisting Gon’s shirt as his hands curl into fists. He never once tries to pull away, only clings to Gon tighter and harder, and Gon distantly wonders if the heat between them belongs to him or Killua.
He decides it doesn’t really matter. Not as long as Killua stays right where he is in Gon’s arms and Gon in his. Because Gon wants Killua, and he doesn’t plan on letting go any time soon.
-o0o-
Gon quickly learns that he really, really likes kissing Killua. A lot. He loves kissing Killua’s mouth, his cheeks, his nose. He loves the tiny noises Killua makes, his quiet laughter and bright eyes. He loves that the longer the spend kissing, the quicker Killua melts into Gon’s arms like he was always meant to be there. There’s nothing about kissing Killua that Gon doesn’t like, actually.
Well. He doesn’t really like that he only gets to kiss Killua once every week or so. Killua only comes to the Castle when his parents were called upon for meetings with Aunt Mito, so that was the only time the two of them could sneak off and spend time together.
But even that is okay. Because as long as Killua keeps coming back to him, keeps sending him funny pictures on snapchat and keeps kissing him with that happy, relaxed expression on his face...that is all Gon really cares about.
-o0o-
It’s about a month after Gon and Killua shared their first kiss when Gon is woken up in the morning with the slap of a newspaper hitting his face.
“Read,” his Aunt Mito says once Gon opens his eyes. She’s wearing a stony, unreadable expression that makes Gon’s stomach twist into knots and his heart to turn over in his chest. He’s seen that face on her before, and it’s never led to anything good.
He looks down. Across the top of the paper in bold black letters is a headline that reads ‘PRINCE IN LOVE? ROYAL HEIR CAUGHT KISSING STRANGER’.
Gon’s heart drops.
“Well?” Aunt Mito says as Gon pushes himself up. He unfolds the newspaper, only to find a blurred black-and-white picture of himself and Killua holding onto each other tightly. It’s not hard to tell what they’re doing with so little space between their faces. “Is it true?”
Gon winces at her cold tone. “Maybe? Um.” He gulps when he sees her icy stare. “Okay, maybe it’s...a little more serious than a maybe.”
“How serious, Gon?”
Gon doesn’t say anything. He can’t, because Aunt Mito won’t like the answer, but he guesses she must know anyway by the heavy sigh she lets out.
“Who is it?” she asks finally. She’s pinching the bridge of her nose between her fingers like it’ll somehow keep her calm.
“Um...” Gon twiddles his thumbs. “It’s Killua. Killua Zoldyck? Um.”
Aunt Mito just stares at him in what can only be described as total disbelief. “Killua Zoldyck?” she repeats. “How—How did you even meet him?”
“When he came to the Castle a few months ago with his parents? They’re our advisors—“
“I know who they are, Gon,” Aunt Mito says sharply and Gon flinches. She sees it and a look of guilt flashed across her face. Gon watches as she sighs heavily, the anger deflating out of her, and doesn’t speak when she sits down on the edge of his bed.
“You don’t approve?” he asks and his voice comes out small. Aunt Mito is the closest thing to a mother that Gon will ever get. Her approval weighs on his shoulders with everything he does.
But he’s not sure if it will hold much sway when it comes to Killua. Gon wants to be in good graces with Aunt Mito, but...he wants Killua, too.
Aunt Mito frowns. She reaches out hesitantly before curling her fingers around his fist. “Honey. It’s not that, it’s just...”
“Just what?” This time Gon is the one to snap, and Aunt Mito the one to grimace. “Killua is smart and kind and brave! He’s brilliant, and he—he—“ Gon’s brows burrow, a heat blooming across his cheeks, “—he cares about me! I know he does. There’s no one else who would be better at my side.”
His aunt’s frown deepens at the edges. “Gon. Don’t tell me you’ve proposed?”
The heat in his cheeks grow hotter. “N-No. Not yet, at least...”
“You’ve only known him a few months.”
“So?!” Gon wrenches his hand out of hers, anger making him not care how she pulls back as if burned. “Why does it matter? If I want to marry Killua, it’s my decision! And his. No one else has a say in it!”
To be honest, Gon hadn’t thought of marrying Killua until now. But now he thinks back to that day in his room with Killua in royal garb, holding Gon’s hand tightly and looking at him with that soft, vulnerable look that makes Gon’s heart stutter and flip. Now Gon knows why that memory is so precious to him, why it feels so important. Gon knows he would be a better King with Killua at his side.
Aunt Mito breaks through his thoughts gently, “Gon, it’s sweet that you care so much about this boy. I’m sure he is all the things you say, and more.”
Gon tenses. “But?”
“But,” Aunt Mito says slowly. “It’s...it’s just not possible for you two to be together.”
Anger flares in Gon. “Why not?”
“You have to marry another of royal blood,” Aunt Mito tells him. There’s a real apology in her eyes but Gon doesn’t want to see it. “It’s the law. You cannot rule the Kingdom otherwise—“
“Then I won’t be King!” Gon bursts out and Aunt Mito pales in shock. Gon thinks of soft silver hair and small genuine smiles and bright blue eyes, and his heart twists. “I—I love Killua, Aunt Mito! I don’t want to be with anyone else!”
For a few seconds that feel like hours, his aunt just stares at him. Gon doesn’t know what she’s thinking—he can’t read the flickering emotions in her eyes—but his chest his heaving and blood is roaring in his ears and he wouldn’t ever take back what he just said even if he wanted to. Killua is important to him and has been for a long time. Gon won’t give him up.
Finally, Aunt Mito lets out a long breath. She rubs her eyes and she looks ten years older suddenly. Gon feels bad, but only because she looks so tired.
“I know you care about Killua,” she says. “But, you just...you can’t give it all up for him, Gon. The Kingdom can’t have another succession. Our people need stability.”
Gon stiffens. He knows she’s talking about Ging—his father, her cousin. Ging left ages ago without so much of a word and the only reason the Kingdom is so stable now is because of Aunt Mito and their advisors. Advisors like Killua’s parents.
“I don’t want to fight with you on this. So, please, just—“
“Find someone else?” Gon snaps, his sheets twisting under his fists. Aunt Mito presses her lips into a thin line, looking like she’d rather be anywhere else.
“...try to let him go,” she amends and Gon’s heart cries out in immediate protest. “I’m sure he’s wonderful. But you need someone who can rule a Kingdom with you. And that cannot be Killua Zoldyck.”
-o0o-
Gon doesn’t speak to his aunt for days after their discussion. The papers don’t let up despite her announcement that Gon isn’t in any formal relationship with anyone, and every time Gon tries to leave the Castle now he’s swarmed by reporters. It gets so bad that he has to stay locked up in the Castle, unable to slip away unnoticed when he never had a problem before. Within a week Gon is bored and full of anxious energy.
And the worst part is that Killua won’t text him back.
Before the paper, he and Gon sent a never-ending stream of messages and pictures. Gon got hundreds of messages from the other teen a day and he cherished every one.
But now there’s nothing, and Gon doesn’t know what to do.
“I feel awful,” Gon says to Zushi. And he does, really. His stomach is a mess of knots and every time he checks his phone and sees nothing his heart sinks further and further into the ground. “What if he’s in trouble, or his parents said something to him? What if I never see him ever again?”
“Do you really like him that much?” Zushi asks, looking surprised, and Gon groans.
“Why does everyone keep asking me that,” he grumbled and glares down at his impossible math homework like it has the answers to all his problems. Killua always knew what to do with math. He was smart like that.
“Well, it’s just...” Zushi hesitated and Gon looks at him questioningly. “You’ve never held back from getting what you want? Normally you go after with—with fists held high and all that.”
Gon frowns at his friend. “Yeah? So?”
“So,” Zushi says carefully, tapping his pencil against the paper. “What are you waiting for this time?”
-o0o-
Zushi’s words stick with Gon. They echo in his ears and makes his heart do strange little leaps because, really, what is he waiting for?
Aunt Mito won’t voice her approval no matter what. She loves him, but there’s always two parts to being royalty: your royal persona, and yourself. Ging chose himself, and that forced Aunt Mito to choose her persona when Gon was only a toddler. She can’t go back and choose differently now and Gon wouldn’t want her too. She’s an amazing Queen and she’s never shied from her duty. But, Gon...
Gon had never known which side of him would win over the other. He loves Whale Island with his whole soul, loves the beaches and the jungles, loves talking to fisherman and tourists from across the globe. He loves his home, his family. He only thought about leaving in fleeting thoughts, maybe to find where Ging went and what was so important that he could leave it all behind.
But now after meeting Killua...Gon thinks he might understand Ging just a little bit better.
-o0o-
It’s two weeks after the papers published the picture of him and Killua that Gon makes his decision.
Aunt Mito was holding a party in the Palace for Gon’s eighteenth birthday. It had been planned nearly a year ago, but Gon could tell even back then that it was a chance for Gon to meet suitable partners.
Now, though, the idea makes him sick. He still misses Killua like someone had ripped his heart out of his chest. Killua is his best friend, and two weeks of no communication couldn’t change that. Nothing could ever change that.
So, instead of going to the ballroom with his hair styled all fancy and wearing an uncomfortable suit that Gon hates...he just, goes.
It’s selfish, to sneak out a hidden door of the palace and steal an abandoned bike from the town that surrounds the palace. It’s selfish, to not attend a ball in his honor and disappoint Aunt Mito who had always loved and looked after Gon like he was her own son. But Gon has always been selfish. And he wants Killua, more than anything.
-o0o-
It takes at least an hour to reach the Zoldyck mansion. Gon’s never been here before but he knows where it is because Killua had shown him it once, looking up his address and flipping through pictures on his phone to show Gon images of spiral staircases and sparkling kitchens. Killua hates it here.
“It’s dark and cold and boring,” the other teen had complained loudly one of the first times they met. “My parents are always looking down my shoulder and my older brother can’t leave me alone for more than an hour. It sucks so much. I wish I could just run away...”
Well. Gon hopes Killua still has that same wish.
Gon gets onto the Zoldyck property no problem. Their guard takes one look at him, smiles, and says “You must be Your Royal Highness Gon Freecss. Are you here for Killua?” before letting Gon pass through. It takes him a bit longer to find Killua’s room—the mansion is huge and Gon doesn’t want to accidentally wake up the wrong person—but when he does it’s because of a face as pale as the moon staring out, silver whisper of hair framing his face.
Gon’s heart lurches. Killua.
He throws a rock at the window. It would have hit Killua in the nose if not for the glass, and Killua is so startled he throws himself backwards and out of sight. Gon waits for him to come back anxiously, still wearing his birthday suit that Aunt Mito got for him. It’s uncomfortable to wear, and even more uncomfortable to wait here for Killua to return, but return he does. He lifts the window and, it’s hard to tell in the darkness of the evening, but Gon thinks the other teen might just be blushing.
“Gon!” Killua hisses. “What are you doing here?!”
Gon keeps staring. He’d forgotten just how /blue/ Killua’s eyes really were. “You’re beautiful,” he blurts out and Killua really does go red at that.
“Y-You—“ he shakes his head as if that will somehow dispel the scarlet in his cheeks, “—no, you don’t get to distract me! Answer my question: what are you doing here?”
Gon frowns. “I came to see you! Isn’t that obvious?”
Killua turns even darker, if possible. “And why the hell would you do that? Isn’t it your big birthday bash today?”
So. Killua knows about Gon’s party. But he still didn’t come— “Yeah, it is! So why didn’t you come to my party? Your whole family is there, I watched them come in!”
“I wasn’t allowed, dumbass. Why do you think I haven’t been texting you back?”
Ah, so that’s what it was. Gon had suspected that much, but it still makes him sad. Killua never spoke of love for his family and now Gon knows why.
“Would you have texted me back?” Gon asks. “If you were allowed, I mean.”
Killua makes a noise that sounds like a cross between a sigh and a huff. He looks torn, and Gon knows how easily Killua gets embarrassed but he still wants to know. He needs to know.
“Of course I would have,” Killua mumbles out, just barely loud enough for Gon to hear him, and something warm and giddy bursts into life in Gon’s chest. He knew it, he knew Killua felt the same strong connection that he did—
“But that doesn’t change anything,” Killua says and the happiness in Gon’s heart freezes. “I—we cant be together, Gon.”
That hurts more than anything. But Killua didn’t say he didn’t want to be together, so there was still hope. “Why not?” he calls back, face twisted in pain and Killua hisses at him to be quiet, oh my god. “You said you would have still texted me, so that means you still want to be with me!”
“You—You idiot, don’t say that so loudly!”
“Then tell me what the problem is!” There’s a desperate twinge to the edge of his voice but Gon doesn’t care. He doesn’t care about anything right now, except Killua. “I don’t understand, if we want to be together that’s all that matters!”
“The Kingdom matters, Gon!” Killua finally snaps back and Gon’s lips thin. “You can’t tell me your aunt didn’t tell you about your duties as heir! You can’t be with a commoner—“
“You’re not a commoner, you’re our advisors!”
“That’s basically the same thing!” Killua says, exasperated. His silver hair is illuminated from behind by the light of his room and Gon wants to run his fingers through those silky locks so badly it hurts. “It doesn’t matter what my position is, you need to be with someone of royal blood. That’s it, okay. There’s nothing else that can be said, nothing else we can do—“
Anger bubbles up in Gon. Because, no, there has to be something else! Another way, another path, another something that will let him keep Killua at his side!
“—it’s over—“
“No!” Gon bursts out and Killua jumps. “No! I—I don’t believe that! We have fun together, why can’t that be enough? Why does anyone else matter, this is just between us!”
Gon’s chest is heaving from the intensity of his outburst. Killua is staring down at him with wide, beautiful blue eyes and every part of Gon aches.
“If I wasn’t the prince,” Gon says, taking a step closer to the mansion. “If I was just a regular citizen like you...would you stay with me?”
Killua swallows thickly. Gon can see the way his hands grip the window sill enough to make his knuckles go white.
“Don’t ask stupid questions,” Killua whispers, just loud enough for Gon to hear. “Of course I would. You know that.”
Gon’s heart leaps. He had known that Killua cared for him too, almost enough to match Gon’s affection for him. But Gon loves Killua so much that he really doubts anyone else could match it—even Killua himself.
“Then come away with me,” Gon says. He wants to hug Killua so bad it hurts, but Killua is three floors above ground and it’s going to take some convincing to get him down to Gon’s level. “Leave with me tonight—right now—and no one can do a thing to separate us.”
Killua is gaping openly at him. “Are—Are you insane?! Do you even hear what you’re saying, you idiot! There’s no way we can just pick everything up and go—“
“Why not? We can go explore the world together, traveling and learning and having fun! It would be an adventure, Killua! One I wouldn’t want to go on with anyone else.”
Killua’s already shaking his head before Gon finishes, face dark in a deep flush. “You’re crazy. Absolutely, one hundred percent crazy.”
“You already knew that!”
“Yeah, but—“ Killua lets out a long breath and his bangs flop against his forehead, “—this is a new level of crazy, even for you.”
“Killua, listen,” Gon pleads. “Please, come away with me. I can’t legally rule the Kingdom until I turn twenty one, and Aunt Mito can keep ruling for another three years no problem. The people love her! We can leave and say we’re searching for Ging, to see if he’ll come back to take his crown. That’s a perfect excuse to go!”
“Your dad left the Kingdom over fifteen years ago, Gon! Why the hell would he come back now?”
“He won’t,” Gon admits. He’s never met his dad, not really. Knowing him for two years before Ging abandoned everything to his name doesn’t count in Gon’s opinion. But he knows now that they’re similar enough to give up anything for what they really want.
And Gon wants Killua. He wants freedom and to have fun and go on adventures and he wants Killua.
Killua makes an exasperated noise above him. “If you already know your dad won’t come back, what’s the point of chasing after him?”
“The point,” Gon says patiently. “Is that it’ll buy us three years. And once I turn twenty one, no one can tell me who I have to marry.”
Killua’s jaw drops. “Wha—Gon. If this is a proposal, I swear to god I’ll come down there and beat you up!”
“It’s not!” Gon whines. Not yet it’s not, at least. “I’m just saying...we’d have three years to figure it all out. And we could do it together, Killua. No one breathing down our necks or keeping us apart. We’d be together.”
Killua doesn’t say anything to that. He’s gazing down at Gon with huge eyes and wild silver hair.
“So?” Gon steps forward again, wishing he could defy gravity and bound up the wall to take Killua in his arms. “What do you say, Killua?”
Killua’s chest is rising and falling rapidly now. He sucks in a deep breath as his face grows ever darker. Gon’s chest swells as Killua begins, “I—“
“Your Royal Highness.”
A bright light is shone in Gon’s direction and he yelps, raising his arms quickly to block it. He sees sharp and shiny back shoes from the edge of his vision, and when the flashlight is lowered Gon is face-to-face with a girl in a butler's uniform. She can’t be even three years older than Gon, but she looks at him with brown eyes so serious it feels like she’s hundreds of years old.
Busted.
“Canary!” Killua hollers and both the girl and Gon look up at the Zoldyck heir. “Canary, I—please don’t tell my parents. I didn’t know he was coming, I swear it.”
Canary looks back at him with an unreadable expression and Gon winces.
“He didn’t, honest!” Gon holds his hands up in a show of peace. “I’ll even pinky promise, if that’ll help convince you.”
Canary frowns minutely. “That...won’t be necessary, Your Royal Highness. But I must ask you to leave. Master Killua isn’t allowed any visitors.”
Gon glances up to see Killua already watching him. Blue meets brown, and it’s then that Gon knows—
Killua has his answer. Gon can see it in his eyes.
“Killua, I...” Canary is already pushing him along with a cane that looks more like a weapon than anything. Gon twists his head around to shout over his shoulder, “I’ll wait for you! I promise, I’ll stay all night if I have to!”
“Let’s go, Your Royal Highness.”
The last thing Gon sees before he’s forced to face around again is the silver shine of Killua’s hair as he ducks back inside his room.
-o0o-
Gon is waiting at the specialty chocolate stand location for all of ninety-nine minutes when he spots a flash of silver in the distance.
He stands up straight, pushing himself off the ledge of the square’s fountain just in time to catch Killua in his arms. The force with which Killua runs into him is enough to send them both stumbling, but not enough for them to let go. Killua’s fingers are digging into his shoulder blades and Gon knows his arms must be tight enough around Killua’s waist to make it hard to breathe. But that’s not a reason to let go, and they cling to each other for a few minutes longer than necessary.
“You okay?” Gon asks hoarsely. He notices that there’s a backpack wrapped around Killua’s shoulders. He hopes it’s not too heavy; they need to move fast if this is going to work.
“Yeah,” Killua breathes in his ear, and silver hair tickles the edge of his jaw. “Yeah. Never better.”
“Good.” When Gon pulls back, he’s beaming. There’s a little thrill in his chest as Killua’s cheeks turn pink in response. He doesn’t think he’ll ever get tired of the way Killua looks at him, the way he reacts around him.
He reaches out to lace their fingers together, bronze skin standing out in sharp contrast to pale fingers. Killua squeezes his hand and Gon’s heart leaps.
“Ready?” Gon asks, giddy and excited and breathless all at once.
Killua’s answering smile is brilliant in the moonlight.
“Ready.”
-o0o-
Mito sighs heavily when she unfurls the morning newspaper. It’s what she had been expecting, of course. The crown prince of the nation doesn’t simply vanish into thin air and no one hears about it.
‘CROWN PRINCE VOWS TO FIND LONG LOST KING, RUNS AWAY WITH NEW LOVER’
She reads the words once, then twice, and even a third time. She doesn’t buy Gon’s promise to find Ging. He might have cared about that when he was younger, but he hadn’t expressed interest in finding his father since Kite had died...
But this Killua Zoldyck. He is the reason Gon had left, so they could be together despite all odds. Gon found a way to be with him even when the world said no.
Mito’s lips twitch upwards into a begrudging smile. Gon is so stubborn sometimes. But he had promised to return and promised to write, and Gon’s promised always held weight.
“Be happy, Gon,” Mito whispers. She traces his picture in the paper, wondering...
By the time Gon returned, he might even be married.