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"Okay, okay, fine," Cam admitted with a barely noticeable smile. "It's possible that your mom's weird connections actually worked out well this time."
"Don't let it get to your head," Monte grunted, but even he couldn't hide his enthusiasm about their set up. They were playing in one of the biggest arenas Adam had ever seen, with a fucking futuristic sound system and acoustics to die for. The front of the stage was lined with a long neat row of guitar pedals that Monte and Tommy were eyeing somewhat grudgingly like kids in a candy shop. Longineu's drum set glowed in the dark and had built in pyrotechnics.
And their host to the festivities was about to break a record streak of being crowned world's most eligible bachelor in three international magazines for five years running. Adam had only gotten to speak with him for a few minutes before the preshow meet and greet, but there was something promising about his smile, not to mention his offer to show Adam around town after the show. The view from the top of Wayne Tower, he promised, was breathtaking.
When they got up on stage, it felt like the entirety of Gotham cheered. It was one of the best shows of Adam's life.
He was still riding the post-show high and channeling it into intense afterparty flirting, if blatant propositions were even considered flirting these days, Adam had stopped following – when the elegant, ceiling-high glass doors of the ballroom crashed in.
Bruce froze beside him.
"I'm he-re!" called a shrill voice, followed a moment later by an explosion of green smoke. A clown riding a green-and-purple tractor rolled into the room, broken glass cracking and snapping angrily below its wheels. "—for your entertainment!" he exclaimed. Fireworks erupted from the headlights of his tractor. At least Adam hoped they were fireworks, because the alternative was bullets.
Somehow he didn't think this was the planned afterparty entertainment.
He reached out for Bruce to ask him what was going on, but Bruce was gone. Instead he saw movement just past the edge of his vision, something powerful and black, and heard a low growl: "Stay here."
Fuck if Adam was going to hide while the rest of his band were out in the open facing the – what the, killer clown?, but then Tommy and Cam and Monte and Longineu were somehow mysteriously thrust in his direction, and with band huddled around him, Adam had absolutely no problem cowering in the corner and staying out of the line of fire.
Unfortunately 'line of fire' wasn't a metaphor, as someone dressed like a giant moth jetpacked in from the skylight and started spraying the tables with a blowtorch. "And it burns, burns, burns," he cackled.
"Shut up," Adam said immediately, but his band was already giving him accusing looks. "This is not on me." After a pause, he muttered. "It's on my mom. Oh shit, duck," he said, as a stream of icy jetted in the air a foot above their heads. It hit three reporters, who froze and broke to pieces.
"On the plus side, it's putting the fire out," Longineu noted.
A red-haired woman in a deep green dress and blood red lipstick slunk towards him and murmured, "He might put the fire out, but I'm going to give you a fever…"
Longineu backed away just in time, as the woman was kicked back by a small green-clad man wearing a domino mask that looked like it was made of cardboard. He was clutching a remote control in his hand. "Riddle me this," he said, eyes gleaming. "How many people do you think come to an Adam Lambert concert?"
And then a man dressed as a giant bat swooped down from the ceiling and smashed the riddling man to the wall. He made his way back to Adam and the band in a series of drop kicks and backflips.
"A lot," he growled when he landed in front of them. "The answer is a lot. Come on, I think it's time for you guys to leave town. Let's get you out of here."
"Wait. How do we know we can trust you?" asked Adam.
The bat-man met Adam's eyes gravely. "I know your mom."
Tommy started, "That really doesn't count for m—"
"For fuck's sake, Tommy," Cam said. "We're going."
*
The next time Adam's mom asked him to book a gig as a favor to one of her LARPing buddies, Adam said no.