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“You can’t avoid these forever Lord Seventh,” said Shikamaru sternly, pointing at a pile of official looking scrolls they had placed haphazardly in the corner to gather dust.
Naruto barely looked up from his computer, “Why not? It’s all so old-fashioned. An arranged marriage? In this day and age?”
“Well, it does come off as rather rude to some very important people to just ignore them. And yes, maybe these people are archaic and behind the times, but they are people we should take care to not piss off too badly nonetheless,” replied the advisor.
Naruto snapped the computer shut, giving his friend his complete attention, “It’s just I’m not some type of prince, I don’t see what the big deal is with me being single. I’m not going to get married to some random girl I have never met. So if you don’t want to ignore them, I guess you should just have someone write back some nice, polite , responses telling them basically, ‘Hell No’ and ‘please never contact the office of the Hokage with such a request ever again’.”
“Or you could just meet with them all at once, it would be a nice sign of good faith among these Lords and merchants who are throwing their daughters at you.”
Naruto gave his friend a skeptical look, “Wouldn’t that just make them more eager? Knowing that I might entertain the idea, you know?”
Shikamaru shrugged, “It worked for Lord Sixth.”
“Really?” said Naruto, leaning back in his chair, “Kakashi-sensei met with prospective partners for an arranged marriage? But he’s been with Gai for years.”
“He didn’t really want to announce that he had a male partner to a bunch of lords and businessman. He did have considerably less offers though, but they appeared to be satisfied just be being acknowledged by the Hokage.”
“Of course he did,” said Naruto smugly, “Hey, hey, Shikamaru, did he read his porn the whole time? Barely acknowledging the ladies?”
The advisor rolled his eyes, “No, you know Lord Sixth was a very good diplomat and took his job seriously. Though I do think he considered it. And don’t let your head get too big, it seemed some rumor got around that he’s missing part of his jaw or something and that’s why he wears the mask. That probably had something to do with the fewer offers.”
“Well I’m missing an arm! Milk that! Say that I’m terribly deformed under all my clothes!” said the Hokage.
“Yes, Naruto, I will get around and tell everyone that you missing your testicles at a later date, hopefully it will ward off any marriage-seekers that are just a bit too taken with you and want to try their luck over and over again,” said Shikamaru wryly.
Naruto clutched his chest, “Such sarcasm, from my chief advisor too! But anyway, you really believe I should meet with these ladies?”
“Just a dinner, like an official state one. All you have to do is mingle with them, give each one a few minutes of your time. That’s all.”
Naruto sighed, massaging his forehead, “Okay, I trust you.”
“You’d be a lot less troublesome if you would just go ahead a find someone to settle down with,” said Shikamaru, crossing his arms.
“I haven’t met The One yet! And I’m only 28! I have time. Ah, who knows maybe I will fall head over heels for one of these ladies,” said Naruto, resting his chin in his hands with a smile.
Shikamaru decided to simply change the subject to other matters of business, not wanting to broach the subject that everyone knew was a sensitive one. The subject of how Naruto more than likely did have a “One” and he had been stuck on him since they were 12. Because of this man, Naruto had remained single despite the many offers he had received over the years. He hadn’t even given them a chance, not even Hinata who eventually settled into a happy relationship with Kiba. Now he was the Hokage and had been for over a year, and young women couldn’t just come up to him in the street, these formal marriage proposals were the only potential romantic attention he was getting.
Shikamaru wondered what a certain Uchiha would do if he found out about said proposals. Probably a quick katon jutsu leaving nothing but a pile of ash. It was a good thing he was away on a long term mission.
***
Naruto hoped that the dinner that Shikamaru suggested may never come to pass but he had a few assistants working under his advisor who jumped at the chance to plan the whole thing. And so he found himself a little over a month later, sitting in the place of honor at the head of a dining table at Konaha’s nicest establishment, dressed in orange hakama and feeling very awkward.
There was a dozen or so young women, dressed in kimonos that probably were worth as much as Naruto’s yearly salary, seated around the table with their escorts. Naruto had been introduced to all of them but he knew it would be hopeless even trying to remember their names.
Some were Konaha natives, a couple from the shinobi clans. One Naruto had actually been on a mission with a few years back. She was a fierce kunoichi who had been altogether unimpressed with him on that mission, despite his heroic reputation, but she had smiled politely as she bowed to him at the beginning of dinner. It didn’t take Shikamaru’s genius to see that she was fuming though, probably having been pressured by the elders of her clan to attend the dinner. Naruto wanted to reassure her that he felt just as awkward but he graciously let her sulk off with her skittish attendent.
The other women had traveled in for the meeting, some were the daughters of influential tradesmen who had business in Konaha, others were relatives of foreign daimyo. Naruto felt a bit bad about wasting their time, but Shikamaru had reassured him that they would just assume some other girl had won out, even if Naruto was simply holding onto his bachelorhood as tight as he could.
Employees of the establishment, a large traditional teahouse/restaurant that hosted a variety of events, came and set plates of food on the table. The women delicately collected food on their plates with their chopsticks. “We should have hosted this at Ichiraku’s, since they are an actual restaurant now, they could’ve known what they were signing up for,” joked Naruto to Shikamaru who was sitting at his side.
“Yeah, watching you eat probably would’ve run them off. Weeded them out a bit,” said Shikamaru, which prompted Naruto to bump him with his knee from his cross-legged position beside him.
The eating began, after which the entire party would move to a room where there was to be live music, and Naruto was expected to chat with each woman for at least a few minutes. He desperately hoped the time would go by fast.
His moping was interrupted by some commotion from another part of the building, the shoji screens doing nothing to block out the noise. “Sir, please, you can’t go in there!” called an older woman’s voice as the sliding door into the room opened with a clatter.
Naruto dropped the bit of rice clutched between the chopsticks as there stood Sasuke Uchiha, not looking his best in the least. He looked as if he hadn’t bathed properly in a while, his long hair greasy and more lifeless than normal. The dark cloak that he wore had mud stains on it and the hem on the left side appeared to be frayed. His appearance wasn’t the most shocking thing though, it was the fact that Naruto hadn’t expected to see him for a few months.
The Hokage shot up to his feet with a confused, “Sasuke?” and the owner of the establishment, a grey-haired woman in a kimono, ran in beside the man saying, “Lord Seventh, I am so sorry! He just barged in!”
“It is alright, ma’am,” assured Naruto, “He is one of my most trusted shinobi, he must have a good reason. You may go,” The woman looked very relieved and shuffled out of the room with a bow.
Naruto walked over to Sasuke, taking his arm and leading him out of the room and around the corner of the hallway, where they would be safe from being overheard, “Sasuke’s what’s wrong? Is there some sort of emergency? Did you uncover something urgent on the mission?”
Sasuke shook his head, his long hair revealing peeks at his rinnegan, “No there’s nothing urgent going on.”
“No monsters about to attack? No impending wars? No goddesses about to be awakened and seek revenge?”
“Not that I’m aware of.”
“Then why are you here?”
“Dinner. I’m hungry.”
Naruto gave him a long look, “You abandoned your mission and came running back here, because you wanted dinner?”
“I didn’t abandon it, dobe. I will get right back to it after I am done here,” replied Sasuke coldly.
Naruto shook his head, “You do realize what is going on here, right?”
“You are meeting with prospective wives.”
“Yes, and you decide to barge in because…”
“I want to throw my name in.”
Naruto’s face went pale, he feeling welling up in his stomach that made him think he might be sick, “Sasuke, what are you saying?”
“I am saying I am here for the exact reason those women are, I am the head of my clan and I have as much right to put a name forth as anyone.”
“You are the only one in your clan,” said Naruto quietly, knowing Sasuke wouldn’t feel offended.
“Then change that, usuratonkachi.”
Naruto looked at him shocked, their relationship had been tentative and fragile the years after Sasuke came back. They had fallen into a gentle sort of friendship over the years, the two just enjoying spending quiet time together. Though Naruto had certainly felt romantic feelings for the other man, he dreaded running Sasuke off. He’d rather have Sasuke at his side, his heart filled with unrequited love, than have him run away again.
But now the Uchiha was standing in front of him, seemingly proposing marriage. Naruto turned away, facing off to the side, as he felt his eyes moisten. “Don’t joke teme, not about that. Please,” he said in a small voice.
“I don’t joke, dobe. You know that,” said Sasuke.
“Well if you’re serious. It’s awfully fast, don’t you think? You just walked in the door like two minutes ago,” said Naruto trying to make sense out of the situation he found himself in.
“I feel like I’ve wasted enough time, dragging my feet. And I’m tired of waiting, so here I am.”
“So you want to...marry me?”
Sasuke simply answered with a nod, his mouth curved into a small smile.
Naruto’s mind was reeling, the hallway suddenly feeling very hot, “I still don’t know if you are serious.” Sasuke stepped forward, reaching out to take Naruto’s left hand with his right. He pulled Naruto close, big blue eyes looking at the Uchiha with something like fear in his eyes, and leaned in close until their lips gently met. Naruto’s eyes slid shut as he leaned into the kiss, and Sasuke’s arm dropped his hand to wrap around Naruto, pulling him closer. It was an altogether caste kiss though and Sasuke pulled away before it could even begin to get heated.
“Do you believe me now?” asked Sasuke, his arm still around the blonde.
“Mmmm, maybe,” said Naruto with a smile, “But we’ve kissed before, and that didn’t come with a marriage proposal.”
“Only because we were 12, and it was an accident,” said Sasuke, he then leaned forward to whisper in Naruto’s ear, “That was no accident.”
“No, no it wasn’t was it?” said Naruto, “But you are seriously asking me to marry you and you’ve never taken me on a date?”
“We’ve gone out loads of times.”
“On walks! To the market! To the memorial stone! Those don’t count,” said Naruto, finding that he really enjoyed having Sasuke’s arm around him.
“Okay, let’s go to Ichiraku’s. Right now. I’ll buy. Though I know you get paid more than me.”
“Don’t try that Sasuke Uchiha, I know how much money you have,” said Naruto, “But anyway, what about my guests? I can’t just leave.”
“Why not? Just go in there and say you’re off the market, sorry ladies,” said Sasuke with a shrug.
“I don’t remember accepting,” said Naruto with a snort.
Sasuke gave him a knowing look, and Naruto sighed, “Okay. You know I don’t turn down free ramen. Just give me a minute.”
Naruto came back a moment later, having explained that some grave matter of Konoha shinobi business had come up and he must depart with Sasuke at once, but they should remain and enjoy the food. Any further requests could be made to his advisor. Shikamaru didn’t look all too surprised at the development and had urged Naruto to go on.
Naruto met Sasuke at the door and slipped on his sandals. Sasuke looked him up and down, “You are going to go get ramen dressed like that?”
Naruto looked down at his black haori and orange hakama, “Hey, they are a proper restaurant now, you know! Not at a small stall anymore! But I told Shikamaru it was too much, I didn’t understand why I couldn’t wear my regular clothes and Hokage cloak. Do you think I should go change?”
Sasuke reached out to take Naruto’s hand as they walked out into the night, “No, you look very pretty.”
“Handsome!” snapped Naruto with a jerk of the head.
“No. Pretty,” said Sasuke, leaving no room for argument as they walked at a leisurely pace to their destination.
Back in the dining room, surrounded by women who were mostly relieved to no longer feel the pressure of catching the Hokage’s eye, Shikamaru smiled into a small glass of tea. He knew contacting Sasuke and telling him that Naruto was meeting with prospective brides would help push his former classmate into finally making his move. He might have left out the small detail about Naruto having no intention with going through the act, but nobody needed to know that.