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Sam stared at the orange blob that dropped onto his book in confusion. Catstiel’s reproachful glare gave him a hint, but it wasn’t until he’d picked it up that he recognized what it was - a carrot that Dean had carved into a mouse.
Dean’s new hobby of vegetable art had started when Castiel got annoyed at Sam getting so into his books that he forgot to eat. He’d gone to the kitchen to dig up something he could bring Sam, and found a stalk of broccoli he could just carry in his mouth as Catstiel. Sam had been quite weirded out when the broccoli dropped in front of him, and Dean howling in laughter certainly didn’t help. Ever since then, Dean had kept a small cache of vegetable mice for Catstiel to bring to Sam.
One day, Sam was going to get the story of the cucumber mouse out of one of them. He really was.
Probably not today. Max Banes was watching him eat the carrot with a huge smile. “I wish my familiar was that cute about being helpful.”
“I wish your familiar was helpful at all,” Alicia snarked at him.
“He’s not my familiar.” Two sets of eyebrows raised. “He’s not.”
“You sure about that, dude? Because he’s not a normal cat, that’s for sure, and it’s obvious that the two of you are bonded.”
Sam reached out and skritched Catstiel’s ears. “You wanna show them?”
“Mrow.”
“Okay.” Sam picked Catstiel up and tucked him under one arm in a secure football hold. “He’s not a normal cat. He’s also not my familiar. He’s... his own thing.”
“But the two of you are bonded,” Alicia said. “Somehow. Right?”
“Not anything magical or... whoa!” Catstiel squirmed free and ran for one of the bookshelves, pawing at a book until it fell off. Sam went over to pick it up and take it to a table. “After I go eat something, or now?” Catstiel pawed at the book again. “Okay. Wow. Usually when you bring me a mouse nothing will dissuade you from getting me to the kitchen...”
“MROW.”
Sam took the hint, sitting back down to flip through until Catstiel put a paw on the book. He read the page, stopped, reread the page, stared at Catstiel while Catstiel stared back, and read the page one more time. “Seriously?”
“Mrow.”
“You’re sure.”
“MROW.”
“Huh. Okay. You are not allowed to tell Dean, he will never shut up.”
Catstiel jumped down and walked stiffly into the kitchen. Sam followed, along with Max and Alicia, to find Catstiel weaving between Dean’s legs. Dean glared at Sam. “If your cat causes me to drop something, I’m throwing him out into the snow.”
“What snow? It’s June!”
“Don’t test me.” Dean glared down at Catstiel. “Why’s he still a ca...OW!”
Sam bit his lip. Laughing at Dean getting his leg bitten by Catstiel would not do anyone any good. “Catstiel, come on, don’t bite the leg that feeds you.” He bent to pick him up, cuddling him close. “What’s gotten into you? Why are you mad at me?”
Catstiel squirmed out of Sam’s arms, running off into the hallway. Sam followed, and this time, no one else came. Catstiel led the way to their bedroom, where he changed back. “Why are you ashamed of me?”
“Huh? You’re the one who decided not to let Max and Alicia know exactly how you’re not a normal cat...”
“Not that, Dean. Why don’t you want him to know about the bond?”
“Because he will never stop teasing us!”
“So you’re ashamed of me. You’d rather hide something that important from your brother than listen to some jokes, because those jokes will make you feel bad.”
“That’s not... I’m not ashamed of this! Surprised as hell, how did this happen, but not ashamed!”
“It happened because you accepted me, even after discovering that I was not simply a cat who reminded you of me but actually me, and defended our bond to Dean. You stopped pushing me away.”
“When the hell did I ever push you away?” A moment’s thought, and then he added, “At least, with my soul?”
“The very first thing you did when you got your soul back was push me away!” Castiel closed his eyes, breathing deeply, and then reopened them. “If you’re not ashamed of this bond, or of me, then why is the thought of Dean teasing you so awful? The two of you tease each other all the time.”
“Because Dean teasing me about being bonded to you would just bring up how little he thinks of us bonding in a non-magical sense, and it hurts! I know that some of them can be blamed on Heaven’s bullshit about the Apocalypse, but from the first time we met, it always seems like every time we start getting closer, you end up pushing me back away. Or dying, those really aren’t your fault, I guess, but…”
“Sam, since my rebellion against Heaven, I have never meant to push you away. I shouldn’t hold you pushing me away without your soul against you, but considering what happened the first time we met when you got your soul back…”
Sam could feel the heat washing through him. “Cas, that… I know I should have told you this years ago, but that wasn’t about not wanting to hug you. That was because if I did, I didn’t think I’d ever be able to let go.”
“Why not?”
“Because I remembered watching Lucifer use my hand to kill you, and I didn’t consciously remember it at the time but one of Lucifer’s favorite taunts in Hell was to appear as you and tell me exactly what ‘you’ thought of my feelings for you. Death was able to block the memories, but he couldn’t block some of the scars.” Sam reached out, pulling Castiel into a hug. “If you’re not gonna push me away again, then we can tell Dean as soon as we can find a way to do it without Max and Alicia finding out your true nature.”
Castiel hugged back, letting himself really lean into Sam. “It’s likely too late for that. I’m sure Dean’s told them, given that he wasn’t there when I asked you not to and they’d be wanting explanations for why I bit him and why we ran away.”
“Come on, then.” Sam let go of Castiel just long enough to take his hand instead, leading him back out to the kitchen.
Castiel was proved right quickly. “How did you get an angel bonded to you?” Max asked.
“Max!” Alicia hissed. “Sam didn’t…”
“It’s okay, Alicia, we were coming out to tell Dean anyway,” Sam said. “Dean, Castiel and I are kind of… married. Sort of. It’s not exactly marriage, but that’s about the best way I can explain it.”
“You two accidentally got married.”
“Yes. It’s similar to how a witch bonds with a familiar, but since I started off as an equal, it works more like a marriage. I was stuck as a cat, and started acting like a familiar, helping Sam research. When I broke the curse but chose to keep my ability to become a cat, Sam accepted me, cementing this bond. I had thought Sam was aware of that, but it would seem he wasn’t.”
“Nope. Not a clue.” Sam wrapped his arms back around Castiel.
Dean smirked. “This mean he gets to start sleeping in your bed in human form?”
“If he wants to, sure,” Sam said, holding Castiel tighter.
“We can figure that out tonight. In the meantime, you need food. Don’t make me get another mouse.”