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Would you ever go back in time to change yourself for the better?
You might say yes now, but when it really comes down to it, would you really be able to take initiative?
What if I were to tell you that you have been given the chance before--several times, in fact. Looking back now, do you ever notice how much making different choices could have affected you?
Some things as minimal as deciding to eat the entire pint of ice cream in one go, or pushing yourself to run the extra yards, or dragging yourself out of bed, or even making yourself brush your teeth.
Those choices might affect you, sure, but not very much.
And sitting in the principal's office right now, Changbin wishes he could go back in time and change all the events prior to lunch period.
The hours spent being taunted by none other than Sa Dohyun had built up resentment and hatred towards the boy, and as soon as the towering threat of releasing his anger grew too tall, the iron gates had opened and Changbin had released all of his pent up anger at Dohyun.
First it started with the simple insults.
Dohyun would call Changbin stupid, pathetic, worthless, lazy; all the things Changbin called himself every day. Needless to say, those didn't affect him as much.
Then it escalated to much more than name-calling.
Pushes and shoves marked the end of the "peaceful" arguments, the word "peaceful" referring to the non-violent methods of teasing. The Elevator of Harrasment, as Changbin liked to call it, took him to the top levels of hell, all of which gave him countless bruises and nights spent fuming and thinking of ways to fucking obliterate Dohyun.
Dohyun would often spread rumors about Changbin, all of which he ignored (or at least tried to). Apparently, Changbin was a bully, fuckboy, and a prostitute. Talk about a package deal.
It wasn't until Dohyun started targeting Changbin's friends did he actually want to do something about the boy.
The same thing with Changbin; it started with name-calling, then the rumors, then the physical attacks.
Hyunjin and Chan were both main targets, since they were two of Changbin's closest friends. Jisung, Seungmin, Minho, and Jeongin were next on the hit list. Not one of them, unfortunately, got exempt from the entire issue. The whole "battle" was their main source of conversation at lunch, and they often poked fun at the situation.
It was fine.
And then came the rumors about Felix.
The embodiment of sunshine, the "golden boy" of the school, the guy that tried to be friends with everyone, was gay.
Some students, being the judgemental little shits they were, took this opportunity to harrass Felix about it, who was completely confused (and innocent).
"Hey, faggot!" Youngsu, an accomplice of Dohyun, jeered in the hallway.
Felix ducked his head and tried to quicken his pace. He could feel his cheeks heating up and the back of his head tingle, as the pressure of the several sets of eyes bore into his skull.
"'Ey, I'm talkin' to you!" Byungchul shouted. "Don't try to walk away from us, you fucking bitch!"
Heart now pounding relentlessly, and seemingly going to pop out of his chest, Felix had broken into a slight jog. His biology class was just up the stairs, which was still too far.
The hallway was thankfully beginning to empty, which Felix was grateful for, but at the same time, he wished he had a crowd he could melt into and hide from Byungchul and Youngsu.
Heavy footsteps pounded behind him, and Felix could see the remaining people in the halls staring at the whole thing go down.
The staircase seemed to stretch infinitely, and despite practically running up the steps two at a time, Felix was just two steps too late.
Felix could feel a hand grab his shoulder and swing his body around before slamming him into the empty hallway's wall.
Youngsu and Byungchul's leering faces came into view in front of him, standing intimidatingly at a height several inches more than his own.
"Did ya really think we would just let ya run, faggot?" Youngsu laughed dryly, relenquishing his grip on Felix's wrist to place it on the wall next to his head.
"I'm surprised you even got this far, pussy. If there wasn't people in the halls to block us, you would've been out of luck a long time ago." Byungchul tucked his hands in his pants pockets and leaned back.
"I--please, I'm sorry. I didn't--I won't--just, please, don't." Felix moistened his dry lips nervously, trying to make himself as small as possible.
Youngsu chuckled. "Oho, you gonna beg now? Get down on your knees and we just might letcha go."
Felix shook his head frantically. "I--I can't, please."
Byungchul reached his hand forward and grabbed a handful of Felix's hair and pulled roughly, warning a whimper from Felix in return.
"You're being disobedient, puppy. And you know what they do with bad dogs?" Byungchul grinned. He reached into his pocket with his free hand and pulled out a switchblade.
"They put 'em down," Youngsu finishes.
Body shaking, Felix could feel his vision getting blurry.
"Aww, what're you cryin' for, puppy?" Byungchul sneered. "We ain't gonna kill ya, just give ya something to remember us by."
He twisted the switchblade in his hands, inspecting it closely.
"Let's say, a scar?"
Felix brought a trembling hand up to his mouth to muffled his sons, tears full out streaming down his freckled cheeks.
He hated this. He just wanted to make friends at a new school. But Dohyun and his need for a sadistic playground had to rain on his parade.
Youngsu stroked a hand over Felix's cheek, almost comfortingly. "Don't cry. It'll be over soon enough. Just say 'ouch' and it's over." The soothing tone in his voice didn't match the expression on his face, which was anything but.
Byungchul grabbed Felix's shirt and rucked it up above his belly button. "Let's start with your tummy, what do ya say?"
"No, please, please," Felix sobbed, knees weakening and he slid down the wall slightly, only staying up with Byungchul's tight grip on his hair. "I'll--I'll be good, please. I'll be small."
Ignoring the pleads, Youngsu nodded at Byungchul. "Let's take him into the bathroom. There'll be no need in there. Hallway's too risky."
Byungchul gritted his teeth, but straightened up. He yanked Felix's hair and pushed him forward.
"Walk, mutt."
Youngsu tucked an arm around Felix's waist and pulled him in the direction of the boy's restroom.
Felix's head ached from where his hair had been pulled, repeatedly. His chest felt like it was going to explode. His tummy didn't have a comfy feeling anymore; instead giving him an entire army of butterflies to flap their wings around the entire expanse of his stomach.
He wanted to go to class.
He wanted to go home.
He wanted Changbin.
Changbin, please, help me.
Getting a sudden feeling of bravery wash over him, Felix jabbed an elbow into Youngsu's gut, and stepped on Byungchul's foot, hard.
Now, with both assaulters in pain, Felix took the chance and ran. He didn't know where he was going, but he knew he needed to get to a teacher, or just someone that would help him.
Apparently overcoming the sudden attack, Byungchul found Felix first, shoving him against the wall.
Felix's yelp was muffled as his face was pressed into the wall, and as his arms were twisted behind him in a bruising grip.
"Stupid, fucking--" Byungchul cursed.
Youngsu caught up with them and held out the switchblade Byungchul had dropped in his haste to catch Felix.
"No need for that."
Twisting Felix around and releasing his wrists, Byungchul waisted no time in burying his fist in Felix's stomach.
Felix cried out and doubled over, sliding down the wall and trying to make himself a smaller target. His efforts failed when a foot found its way to his already aching stomach and jammed itself on a rib.
Felix whimpered and covered his head with his arms, bracing himself for the onslaught of bruising blows.
And for the next few moments, that's exactly what he got. The joint effort of both Youngsu and Byungchul gave little of Felix's body salvation from the relentless kicks, save for his head, with the exception of a cut lip.
"Hey!"
The sudden appearance of an all too familiar voice caught the attention of not only Felix, but of Byungchul and Youngsu as well.
Stopping their assault on Felix, the two turned around to face the confrontor.
Changbin.
And he didn't look happy.
Relief washed over Felix's entire body as he thanked the gods for his knight in shining armor.
Youngsu cursed, and Byungchul spat at the ground.
"Fuck do you want?" Byungchul snapped at Changbin.
"Don't you fucking touch him ever again." Changbin's voice was low and menacing as his gaze drew over the scene in front of him: Byungchul and Youngsu, two of Dohyun's "goons", standing over Felix, his best friend.
"Yeah?" Youngsu challenged. "What are you gonna do about it? It's two against one, odds aren't on your side. Fight us and you'll end up like him." Youngsu gestured behind him towards Felix, who still lay curled in a fetal position.
Felix's arms still covered his face, but as he lowered them slowly to look up, Changbin could see the fresh tear tracks and the split lip.
Changbin gritted his teeth, knowing that fighting wasn't a good idea, but may be the only one he had.
"I don't give a fuck about that," Changbin said. "I'll kick both of your asses if you touch him again."
"Bring it on, pussy boy."
Byungchul threw a fist at Changbin's face, who ducked aside last minute and kicked at his legs. Losing his balance, Byungchul grabbed at the first thing he felt--which happened to be Changbin's sweater sleeve--and pulled him down with him.
Falling on top of Byungchul gave Changbin the advantage of the the upper ground and he brought his fist down on Byungchul's face--hard.
Changbin was only able to get in a couple of punches before Youngsu regained his wit and pulled Changbin up and off Byungchul, who clutched his bleeding nose and glared at Changbin.
Changbin wriggled out of Youngsu's grip, but earned himself a kick in the stomach for his efforts. Winded, he hesitated for too long, and just as Byungchul stood up again, Felix did too.
"Stop. Stop, please," Felix choked out, voice hoarse from crying. He staggered forward, clutching his hurting stomach, towards Changbin.
"Changbin--Changie, please. Please, stop."
Changbin hurried to his feet and backed away from Byungchul and Youngsu, reaching over to pull Felix into a hug.
Byungchul let out a shaky laugh through his hand. When he took his hand off of his face, Changbin could see the blood flowing out of his nose anddown his chin, forming red spots on the ground.
"How sweet," he jeered. "Why dont'cha kiss your faggot boyfriend, too? You're both faggots, both of ya! Dohyun was right."
"Don't--" Changbin could feel his voice rising. "--Don't talk about Dohyun. Don't bring that, that fucker into this. This is between you, both of you, and me. Not Felix, either."
Youngsu sucked in a deep breath and breathes air out of his nose loudly. He opened his mouth to speak, but his sentence was cut off halfway through by another voice dropping in from behind the group of boys.
"Just what do you, all of you, think you're doing?"
It was Mrs. Baek, the counselor.
Oh, fuck.
--
"Never had I ever thought that you, Changbin, of all people, would get caught in all of this!" Mr. Kim, the principal, shouted. "I would have thought that a quiet student like you would know how to handle yourself in situations like this!"
"My friend was getting beaten up, did you expect me to just, just stand there?" Changbin interjected angrily. "He could have gotten a concussion for all we know!"
Byungchul and Youngsu were strangely quiet throughout the entire session, not butting in except for the occasional comment defending themselves.
Byungchul had a tissue in his nose and Youngsu had a black eye, all of which Changbin felt proud at.
L
Felix was still at the nurse's office, being treated for multiple bruises and a split lip.
"If you want more information, just talk to Sa Dohyun. He's the one that's been targetting me and my friends for months on end. If you wanna know what this was all about, then ask him."
Mr. Kim raised an eyebrow. "Sa Dohyun, you say?" He pulled open a desk drawer and thumbed through the files before pulling one out. He examined it for a few moments, the office quiet.
Finally, he gestured at Youngsu and Byungchul.
"You two, wait outside the office."
Not waiting for any other orders, Youngsu and Byungchul quickly exited the room, leaving Changbin alone with the principal.
Mr. Kim sat down on his desk chair and massaged his temple.
"Changbin, I know you. What happened out there.." Mr. Kim sighed loudly and paused. "Changbin, you're a good kid. I know that. But what happened today wasn't acceptable behavior for this school."
Changbin started to speak, but Mr. Kim held up a hand to stop him.
"Changbin," Mr. Kim continued. "I know that you were defending your friend. But you still harmed other students. I will talk to them later, but now, I need to deal with you.
"Changbin, you are suspended for three days for the act of physical assault inflicted on another peer."
Changbin stayed silent, shocked at the statement. "What?"
"I will call your parents to explain the situation, and send work home. I expect you to conform to the school rules when you return." Mr. Kim rummaged through his files again.
"I will address Mr. Sa directly about the, ah, situation. In the meantime, I advise you to stay out of trouble." Mr. Kim looked at Changbin disapprovingly from over his wire-rimmed glasses. "Mr. Seo, you are excused now. Go pick up your stuff from your class. I will speak to you again when your suspension is over."
And without another word, Changbin silently got up and exited the office.
Outside, he saw Byungchul and Youngsu waiting. Youngsu had his head down, and Byungchul was leaning back with his legs crossed and arms folded across his chest.
Changbin exchanges a cold look with Byungchul, before Mr. Kim's voice calls the two boys into his office.
Changbin pushes the door open, and finds Felix waiting for him outside.
Felix immediately wraps his arms around Changbin in a comforting hug, which he melts into.
"I'm sorry," Felix whispers into Changbin's shoulder. "I'm so sorry, for everything."
Changbin pulls Felix into an embrace, not as tight in fear of pressing on the bruises.
"Are you okay?" He murmurs, the sharp pains in his head and heart from the shock of the whole situation fading to a dull ache.
"Better, now that my knight in shining armor is here." Felix had a teasing smile on his face as he faced Changbin.
Wordlessly, he grabbed Changbin's face in his hands and pressed their lips together.
Any other day, Changbin would've been surprised.
But not today. Today, he was mentally exhausted and couldn't spare enough brain cells to fully process what was happening.
But he did have enough energy to feel love for the freckled boy in front of him.
Felix's lips were soft and warm, the cut on his lip giving the kids a slight metallic tang to it.
Changbin found himself wrapping his arms around Felix's small waist, and Felix's hands on his face pulled him closer.
After what seemed like forever, the two pulled away.
Felix softly strokes Changbin's face with his thumbs, his face close enough that Changbin could feel Felix's warm breath fanning over his face.
The freckles dappling over Felix's face seemed to glow brighter on his honey-gold skin, and his warm brown eyes looked endless.
"I'd consider myself more of a peasant than a knight," Changbin eventually breaks the silence around them.
Felix giggles, and Changbin can feel his heart melt and stomach drop at the beautiful sound.
"You're my prince," Felix says.
In that moment, Changbin could care less about announcement of the suspension, and doesn't care to get his stuff.
The two walk hand in hand out of the school, favoring the decision to ditch since the day was almost over anyway. They opted to tell Chan to grab their stuff on his way out instead. And Chan being Chan, the designated mother of the group, would not hesitate.
As they exit the building, the sun's warm rays contrast with the coolness of the air conditioned school.
With the sunshine pouring down on his face, the grass beneath his feet, and the love of his life beside him, Changbin couldn't be happier.
There might be many moments that Changbin regrets, but this isn't one of them.