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“Welcome home!” Amadeus smiled widely, opening the door. Petunia grinned back, arms full of boxes of that sweet, sweet, cheap post-Valentines chocolate. He grabbed the top three boxes, but she hissed when he tried to discharge her anymore, so he didn’t.
“Is this chocolate? Are we eating it now?” Wallis asked all the way from the kitchen door. He was hands in hands with Harold, who was clinging to his leg with his free hand.
After a regretful (if expected) accident where Harold had fallen flat on his face running after his brother, Wallis paid extra attention to hold his hand everywhere he could. It was illegally adorable.
“We are not eating any of this now. Lunch first. Vegetables.”
“Awww.” Wallis pouted, and his father stifled a laugh. “Hey Harold, do you want chocolate for dessert?” His eyes widened. “Can he have chocolate.”
Petunia finished rearranging the boxes in a manner fitting for the organized chaos rampaging through the rest of the house. “Of course he can have chocolate. Just not too much, or he’ll be sick, like anyone else.” After a short pause, she added, “don’t try to feed chocolate to any pet, though. It’s toxic to them.”
Wallis nodded with all the gravity a five years old boy could muster.
Those were the small moments— where they were just a bantering family, when nothing hurt— that filled Amadeus’ heart to the brim. There was so much love inside, he thought he was going to burst open and never recover. It should be impossible to hold so much into a single body, and yet, he kept on breathing, awe unchanging.
There was so much yearning, too, now that he could no longer be part of these instants. Hadn’t for two decades, almost could touch them now. Seeing his family reunited and happy was a miracle, but he couldn’t be part of it. Not like this. Not like he wanted. And it hurt.
He hid his sadness behind his bangs, and turned away from the careless group of friends happily exchanging sweets and gifts—
“Chocolate?”
Petunia held a small piece between her fingers, understanding weaved into her smile. Yearning, too, like him.
“Oh. Thanks.” He took the candy and popped it into his mouth while she bit into her own piece, licked a chip off her lip. Their fingers had brushed, but he let go of the phantom feeling of her touch.
At least the chocolate was real, filling his senses with an almost dizzying sour-sweet flavor. They’d just pretend they could kiss like this, just until the lies ran out of breath.