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This was kind of bullshit. Why did he hesitate? Why did he even care if anyone noticed? Well, it wasn't just anyone, to be honest, but was one person crossing his mind.
He didn't really know why he was so nervous walking in through the gates of Hilltop. It's not like he usually gave much of a damn what anyone thought of him, to a point, but as the group made their way further into the community and people started gathering to meet them, he felt that he did care a little afterall. At least about that particular one person's opinion, anyway.
Speaking of, there was the familiar face. Daryl hadn't even realised he'd been looking for specifically him until he spotted Paul coming out of his trailer to see who had arrived. Fuck, there's that smile that instantly appeared on the man's face when he saw them. Although truthfully it seemed like he barely saw the others except a passing glance. Even from this distance Daryl could tell the scout's searching eyes had found and were only on him; the flip his stomach did in response made him want to turn and go the other way if only to save some embarrassment. The last thing he wanted right now was for Paul to laugh at him. But, as always, he felt himself tugged like from some invisible rope tied around his gut towards the younger man anyway, and most times Daryl followed his gut without thinking, no matter how precarious the situation. Doing his best to ignore the inner sense of dread at the back of his mind at what the smooth-talking younger man would say.
Three days ago Daryl had been playing with Judith on the first day of sunshine after a few days of constant rain. She was getting so big but not big enough yet to be unable to carry on his shoulders. Which is what they'd been doing, him running around the yard with her sitting behind his head, holding her legs over his shoulders to make sure she didnt fall, while she giggled and squealed for him to run faster...and that's when her gum, a special treat from Michonne found on a recent run, had fallen from her mouth and into his long hair, unnoticed until it was tangled in too deeply to easily remove. Of all the things that could have happened during their playdate he had thought he'd prepared for, like a bad slip on the still-damp ground as they'd run around the yard or being forced to eat a mud pie proudly made by Judith, her slightly stale cotton candy flavored gum getting stuck in his hair was not one of them. But what was done was done.
So here it is now. His hair hadn't been this short since they'd lived at the prison. He was sure Carol had done it this way on purpose just because she was sick of him hiding behind it. Which honestly felt so weird for him not to be all to do anymore, the inability to shield his eyes and face when he felt anxious leaving him feeling a bit more vulnerable. Probably partly why he felt this anxious watching Paul come across the courtyard to greet him as he walked up to meet halfway. For some reason what the younger man thought of him meant a lot, even for something as simple as a haircut. It was a new thing to him, this level of wanting to please someone even if just visually. He was already pretty sure, ridiculous as it may be, that if this went the way his anxiety ridden mind was telling him it would and Paul rejected the new look, he probably wouldn't show his face around the scout again until his hair was long enough once more to hide it.
As Paul headed his way though the smile he was wearing only got bigger the closer he got to Daryl, both stopping just a few feet to stand in front of the other, when his cheerful voice announced, "Wow..your hair."
Daryl hoped he didn't blush as much as he stupidly felt like doing in that moment as he watched the other man studying his newly short locks hanging raggedly around his face. "I know. Judith got gum in it, Carol hadta cut it." he admitted with a shrug of one shoulder as if it wasn't a big deal, even as the butterflies going crazy in his stomach while Paul looked him over proved it was otherwise. "That bad, huh?" He asked after a moment, unsure what to make of that look shining in the younger man's eyes.
"Not at all, I love it." Paul grinned, and Daryl actually didn't hear the slightest hint of sarcasm or that edge in someone's voice when they were only saying something to make the other person feel better. He sounded completely honest.
"Ya do?" Daryl asked, wishing he hadn't given another chance for him to change his mind like that. Kind of waiting for a punchline, but it never came.
"Of course, it looks really good on you. Plus it's nice to see that handsome face for a change instead of that mop of hair." Paul teased with a sweet smile that both annoyed him and caused Daryl's heart to damn near leap from his chest in happiness. He had never seen this particular smile on Paul's face before, especially aimed at him. That smile was like cool water running over hot skin, so refreshing and revitalizing, satisfying his soul with just as much life giving nourishment as that same water provided a man dying of thirst. Paul obviously noticed the rush of color to his face this time since he couldn't hide it behind curtains of hair, and that smile of his got even softer and impossibly more beautiful. Damn it, it really did.
Daryl expected an awkward silence, though he should have know there wouldn't be one. There hardly ever was with Paul, simply because somehow nothing seemed awkward between them ever. Things always went so smoothly, even if Paul's teasing eventually got on his nerves enough to start a real argument, which had happened more than once over the last few months, even then it always followed some unspoken rule that it only went so far before one apologized to the other or simply moved on to forget it. Daryl had never known someone who could irritate him and calm him at once, someone that got on his last nerve at times but also he hated not being around. Someone that could push his buttons until he was too angry to think then a few minutes later could make him smile..or, if he didn't physically smile, the want was still there, at least.
As usual this instance was no different, in spite of how awkward Daryl might feel that damned smile of Paul's just twinkled on, as he broke through that moment of silence like it hadn't even been present.
"Hey, I know you just got here and probably have business with Maggie first,--" he had begun. Was there really an undertone of hesitation, maybe nervousness, in the man's voice now or was Daryl hearing things? And the hunter of course noticed the subtle twist of the hands together and that's when he knew this was one of those moments Paul wasn't so confident in his thoughts or words, a rare experience to hear. He realised he didn't really like hearing it, either, that unsure note in his voice or that passing shadow of fear behind those sea-blue-green eyes...when did he start noticing the color of Paul's eyes?...
"Nah, I'm free now." Daryl found himself interupting before he realised he was going to respond at all yet, that inkling of self doubt trying to creep in right after making him wonder if he'd spoken too quickly since Paul hadn't even finished the question.
It seemed to really agree with Paul, though, because that shadow of doubt instantly vanished replaced with such a bright sparkle in his eyes Daryl couldn't help but stare a little, captured by it as a moth to flame. He couldn't remember ever seeing that look in the man's eyes, either. Something about it seemed special just for Daryl, who honestly wouldn't mind seeing that brightness more often.
"Great!" Paul said, practically beaming..how he could smile so much like that all the time without hurting his face was a mystery to Daryl. "You wanna come have some lunch with me? Just finished making it. It's quite a trip from Alexandria, you must be hungry, and I've got plenty for the both of us."
Paul hasn't asked to share a meal with him before, another first, not counting the days he stayed with the scout after he'd risked rescuing Daryl from the Sanctuary. He wasn't sure what to think of the invitation now. Except, well, he was in fact hungry. Everyone else had already gone into the mansion to see Maggie. And the idea of spending such time with the younger man made those butterflies swarm again.
"Sure." was all he responded, however. Simple and neutral with just a hint of a smile for him, though inside he was a mess of emotions he didn't quite understand, mostly good he was surprised to find, at the thought of being so alone with the Hilltop scout.
Upon his agreeing to join him Paul had smiled that damn perfect smile again only this time it was different in such a way it made Daryl's heart flutter in a new strange way it never had done in his life. He didn't pay it much attention now as Paul was leading the way into the trailer, figuring whatever it was would work itself out one way or another as most things do, and just followed him. All he did know was that he felt really, really glad Paul liked his hair.