Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“So I don’t know what to do!” Tim explained as he punched some numbers swiftly into the computer in front of him. “He seems really mad and I don’t know what to do.”

“Just be cute. That usually works for me.” Dick said with a shrug as he tinkered with one of the gadgets that were spread out across the workbench.

“I refuse to believe that works for anyone.” Jason sneered as he kicked his feet up onto Dick’s workbench.

“It’s Dick! How are you even questioning it?” Tim exclaimed and to be fair, they all knew if anyone could get out of trouble by looks alone, it would be Dick. Even Jason knew that Dick could get out of anything just by being cute, not that he would admit it.

“I say you just break up with him.” Damian suggested from where he was seated with his laptop propped up. “I mean not that you could do better.”

“Play nice.” Dick said as he tried his best to maneuver around Jason’s feet.

“Just make him dinner.” Jason said rolling his eyes. “Then it shows a nice gesture and that you want to talk. Just make sure not to make anything that requires knives or forks. Tacos and burgers are always a good choice.”

Silence filled the room as three sets of eyes turned to look at Jason who just shrugged. “That…actually isn’t a bad idea.” Tim declared after a few moments, breaking the silence that have enveloped the room.

“That’s surprisingly sweet.” Dick said proudly, giving Jason’s ankle a pat causing Jason to stretch out and try to kick him.

“I’m surprised that you even know what goes on in a relationship.” Damian quipped before turning back to his work.

“Hey I was married once. And it wasn’t even a cheap Vegas wedding like Dick would do.” He said nonchalantly, pulling a screwdriver into his hand to busy himself. He hadn’t actually meant to say the first part but he couldn’t pass up a chance to make fun of Dick since he was already heading into that direction.

For a few minutes nobody moved. It wasn’t until Dick let out the most high pitched squeal and rolled his chair in front of Jason that the other two moved to also circle him. “When was this? How come we didn’t know? When are we going to meet her? Why weren’t we invited? How could you not tell us?” Dick rambled out somehow managing to sound both hurt and excited. One of the many traits that only Dick could pull off.

“Does Bruce know?” Tim asked hesitantly, as if not wanting to be the only lousy detective.

“And you wonder why I never told you.” Jason said rolling his eyes. “And no, Bruce doesn’t know. You’re not a shit detective. We just didn’t really feel the need to make a big deal.” For a moment Jason’s lip twitched up. “Kinda perfect like that.”

“Seriously how could you not tell us!” Dick cried. “When did all this even happen?”

Jason paused, thinking for a moment. “About a year and a half ago. Just woke up one morning and said we should get married. And they suggested a beach wedding so that’s what we did.”

“You can’t get married in a day.” Tim added skeptically. “It takes longer than that to get a marriage license.”

“Yeah well I’m dead so it was more of a commitment ceremony than anything.” Jason shrugged.

“Did Roy know?” Dick asked with a slight pause. As soon as the words left his mouth an uncomfortable silence fell over the room as Jason’s face went dark for a moment. Jason had said he was fine after Roy was killed, but judging by his actions, all of them knew otherwise. More importantly they knew not to push the subject.

Just as they thought he had closed them off for good, the corner of Jason’s lip twitched up again. “Yeah, yeah he knew. Would have been pretty awkward if he didn’t.”

“Oh right because you guys were roommates.” Dick commented.

Damian’s eyes went wide, “Oh god they were roommates!”

Dick and Tim both raised their eyebrows curiously as Jason let out an amused groan. “Great, now I owe Roy twenty bucks.”

“Jason, Roy’s is-“ Tim started only to be nudged in the side by Dick. The last thing they needed was Jason to go off on them over that.

“So I’m guessing Roy was your best man.” Dick interjected. He pondered for a short moment. “I guess that’s okay.”

“Roy is hardly fit to be the best anything.” Jason snorted. “Actually Kor’i was my best man. As soon as she found out she called dibs.”

“KOR’I KNEW MY LITTLE BROTHER GOT MARRIED AND DIDN’T TELL ME?!” Dick screamed promptly falling out of his chair.

Jason smirked, “Yep. She wore a suit and everything.”

“Are we seriously the last people who knew about this?” Tim asked, looking slightly distressed.

Jason paused, debating for a moment before conceding, “Nah, just Roy, Kor’i, and Donna because Roy can’t resist telling her things.”

“Donna knew too!” Dick cried. “My whole life has been a lie.”

“Had I known I would get this sort of response out of you, I might have told you sooner. This is pretty amusing.”

“Does this mean you’re actually going to introduce us to them?” Tim asked curiously.

“Nope.” There was a collective groan. “I said I was married.”

“So you broke up?” Tim asked.

“We live in a fucked up world and there isn’t happily ever after for people like us.” He said with a frown.

Dick opened his mouth when a voice came over one of the coms, “have any of you found out anything about the location of the drug shipment.”

“Fuck.” Dick muttered before spouting off something about paper trails and it would be done soon as Tim jumped back to his computer typing twice as fast as before. Jason just watching, picking up the metal gadget he had before and started to fiddle with it. He was so engrossed in the project that he didn’t even notice that Damian hadn’t turned to get back to work.

“I was right wasn’t I?” Damian asked quietly with confidence.

“Like you said, and we were roommates.” Jason muttered with a fond smile. “You going to rub it in Tim’s face that you were right?”

Damian thought for a moment. “No, I’ll wait and see how long it takes him.” He paused. “Sucks for you though.”

“Yeah.” Jason agreed.

“Well if he ever appears in a ball of light or something I’ll try to send him your way.”

“Thanks.” Jason said rolling his eyes.

Eight months later, during some cosmic battle when they were just starting to look outnumbered fifteen balls of light fell to the Earth cracking opening like eggs as they feel and fallen heroes emerged with their weapons drawn. It was then that Damian kept his word, pointing Arsenal over to the spot where the Red Hood was firing off his gun. While he was too busy with his own fight he did hear the “about time” from over where he had pointed. Damian rolled his eyes as he continued on with his own battle.

However once it was over, everyone was treated to Jason throwing his helmet to the ground and pulling Roy into the most passionate kiss that they had ever seen outside the movies complete with Roy wrapping his arms around Jason’s neck. Damian smiled, turned rather to watch the dumbstruck looks on his family’s face. Dick had his head tilted to the side as both Bruce and Tim looked like they had reached a system overload and were stuck on processing. Sneaking a glance over it looked like the McQueen family also seemed to be having their own problems dealing with this.

“Can I get pregnant watching this?” Dick asked.

“I’m not sure. This is…I feel like we should have seen this coming.” Tim said, not taking his eyes off of Roy and Jason, who was actually grinning wider than any of the three could remember seeing Jason achieve.

“I told you..they were roommates.” Damian smirked crossing his arms.

Chapter Text

“We don’t have to do this.” Jason said, his arms crossed across his chest. “We can just go back to bed and tell them you weren’t ready.”

“Are you trying to get me back to bed because you don’t want to go or because you want to have your wicked way with me?” Roy asked, buttoning up his shirt as Jason glared at each button.

“Yes.” Jason answered, not bothering to note which he was replying to. “Oliver didn’t invite me to your funeral. And you don’t even like Bruce.”

“Are you seriously going with that?” Roy asked, raising his eyebrow and smirking knowing full well his husband had better retorts than that. “And I like your brothers, and Dinah.”

Jason grumbled as he stalked over and gave Roy a kiss. “You need to stop liking things. It’s annoying.”

Roy laughed, “I liked you.”

“And look where we are now. About to have an awkward dinner with both our families.” This caused Roy to laugh harder. “I don’t know what you find so funny.”

“How about you stop thinking of this as an interrogation and more of a chance to rub our awesome marriage in everyone’s face?” Roy suggested, leaning in for a slow kiss. “Because not even death could keep us apart.”

“Yeah, I’m going to have to hire a better hitman next time.” Jason said, with no real heat. “But if I’m putting up with this we’re getting ice cream on the way home.”

“Really? I didn’t know that all I had to do was stop off for some ice cream sundaes to get you to play nice.”

“I never said anything about sundaes, I was thinking to take home for later.” Jason said, looping his fingers through Roy’s belt loops and pulling him closer.

“You keep doing that and we’re going to be late.” Roy warned.

And so they were late to dinner, but Jason happily filled everyone in on why much to Dinah and Dick’s amusement and the horror of everyone else especially Bruce and Oliver who seemed to pale much to Jason’s glee. Roy seemed equally amused as he dragged Jason by the hand to the table, sitting down next to Dick who gave them both a big grin. Jason wanted to wipe that smile off his face and leaned over to give Roy a long kiss that was only slightly more mature than sticking his tongue out at Dick. Of course rather than annoy Dick it seemed to only make his smile wider. Jason would have been more annoyed but it wasn’t like there was a bad reason to kiss his husband, especially after all those months of not having husband.

Dinner itself was some of the most uncomfortable small talk Jason had to ever endure to the point where he was thankful Dick was there to mediate between Oliver and Bruce who seemed to both want to talk about their recent successes. Normally Jason would gladly tune out the conversation but every time he tried Roy would nudge him with a look that said ‘if I have to listen to this you do too’, which really wasn’t too fair since actually going through with this dinner was Roy’s idea. And more importantly it wasn’t Jason’s fault Dick kept trying to drag Roy into the conversation, clearly missing talking with one of his friends.

As the plates were being cleared Bruce cleared his throat, “You two seem…happy together.” Bruce said as it each word pulled a tooth from his mouth. “Therefore, I’d like to pay for your wedding.”

“Wait what wedding?” Jason said, turning to Roy, automatically assuming this was one of his crazy ideas only to find him equally confused.

“Absolutely not!” Oliver said just below a shout. “We will pay for the wedding. Star City has some beautiful venues. Dinah and I have already started looking.” Oliver added looking at Dinah for backup just to have her shrug and give Roy and sympathetic smile.

“Why pay for a venue when the manor is plenty large for a wedding? Unless that’s what the boys want.” Bruce said, all eyes turned to the boys in question.

Roy cocked his head to the side. “Sorry, but what the fuck is going on? Did someone slip something into my food?”

“No dumbass.” Jason said fondly. “I told you we should have just stayed in bed though.”

“After all you two have been through you both deserve a nice wedding.” Oliver tired.

“Uh.” Roy said looking at Jason for backup only to have him just raise an eyebrow with a smirk. He was clearly enjoying his I told you so moment. “Ollie…you do realize I’m already married right? Like that happened before I died, which I mean is the only reason you have not to have invited my husband to my funeral. So if you did know you might not want to mention it.” He said and Jason gave a snort.

“Yes, Damian gladly filled us in on the fact that you two had a ceremony.” Bruce said begrudgingly. “That being said, it was not an official wedding.”

“We’re both dead at this point I don’t think official really matters.” Jason pointed out, grabbing Roy’s hand under the table.

“I could hack in and make it legitimate.” Tim said, adding his two cents to the conversation.

“What does that matter?” Roy ask, looking around the table. “We had a great wedding, said we would love each other to death and beyond, went home, and had take out.”

“Is that a euphemism?” Dick asked.

“Please don’t answer that. I’m too young to drink and I’m already done with this whole evening.” Damian pleaded, glaring at Dick for even asking. Dick just shrugged sheepishly, at least he seemed to care about not corrupting Damian enough not to push it though Jason expecting a number of phone calls and texts about it later.

“But-” Oliver started.

“No. We’re married. We’re happy. We’re going to go get ice-cream.” Roy said standing up, pulling Jason up with him.

Jason just beamed proudly before kissing his husband and dragging him out of the room, subtlety giving the middle finger behind him.

Later, after the ice-cream and the activities that followed the two laid in bed, Roy curled around Jason like a cat while Jason ran his fingers through Roy’s hair. “You know,” Roy said, “It wouldn’t be the worst idea to have Tim hack in and make our wedding official…”

“I know.” Jason sighed. “I’ll text him tomorrow, see if he’ll do it. He’ll probably make us go on a double date in return.”

“Hmmm, might be worth it.” Roy mused sleepily.

“Yeah…then I’ll have proof your ass is mine.” Jason teased. “That sounded dirtier than I intended.”

“Eh still works.” Roy said, turning over and placing a gentle kiss on Jason chin. “I love you Mr. Roy Harper.”

“And I love you Mr. Jason Todd.” Jason laughed, turning off the light and wrapping his arms around his husband before slipping off to sleep.