Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Was my soulmate going to be really clumsy? Were they going to spill their coffee on me as we passed each other on the street (preferably iced coffee, dear god)? Would we be in a fast food restaurant and they take my order by mistake? Would they accidentally trip me or stumble into me? Why did I end up getting injured somehow in most of these scenarios?

It did make me wonder though… what on earth could the situation be that “Oh, sorry about that” would be my soulmate’s first words to me?

* * * * * * * *

There was a bite to the frigid air blowing past me, slipping in under my collar and raising goosebumps on my skin. My work uniform provided only a hint of warmth and the old jacket I had on could only do so much. My hands left the safe and warm haven that was my pockets to adjust my jacket so it better covered my neck.

Seriously, it wasn’t even winter yet! It had no right to be this cold. Not to mention the days getting shorter which meant I had to walk home when it was much darker than I’d prefer. Normally, I wouldn’t walk at all. But with my car in the shop for an indefinite amount of time, I had no choice. That wasn’t to say that the journey from the coffee shop where I worked to my apartment was an unsafe one (to my knowledge anyway), but hearing the horror stories, ranging from muggings to murders, tended to make me somewhat more paranoid.

To make things worse, my phone was completely dead. I’d plugged it in the night before, blissfully content with the fact that it would charge overnight, only to wake up to find that either my phone or the charger had thrown a hissy fit and my phone was at 21%. After a long shift at work, even though I’d done my best to not touch my phone (... okay I may have forgotten about the dying battery once or twice), it was dead as a doornail. Whatever the hell a doornail was.

And that of course meant that I had absolutely nothing to occupy my time during the walk home. Just the repetitive muted thuds of my boots against the concrete and the rows and rows of practically identical greyish brown buildings I passed by. I let out a quiet huff, pushing myself to walk a little faster.

I wasn’t sure what had me so… was antsy the right word? Whatever it was, something just felt different. Like the cliche overly dramatic sort of different. The kind where the protagonist pauses and completely seriously declares that it’s quiet… too quiet.

I kept walking, internally rolling my eyes at my own paranoia, letting myself get lost in my thoughts again. I thought about the rude old lady that was unfortunately a regular to our coffee shop that always kept us on our toes with the latest thing she was complaining about. Today’s complaint had been that the croissant she’d purchased tasted funny and that we must have been using cheap flour to make them. Who the hell could taste if flour was cheap or not?

I thought about the delightful options I had for dinner. Was I in the mood for instant noodles or a grilled cheese sandwich tonight? Until my pay came in, those were pretty much my only options. At times like this when money was tight, I welcomed my shifts since it meant I could get a cheaper lunch, thanks to my employee discount. Plus it gave me some variety in the food I was eating; there was only so many times I could eat instant noodles or grilled cheese before I lost my mind.

The thuds and shouts probably should have alerted me first, but it was the blur of movement, out of the corner of my eye, that caught my attention. I turned my head just in time to see a masked figure stumble into me. My mind immediately went to the worst case scenario - this was a mugger, someone not afraid to hurt me or even kill me to get my crappy outdated phone or my wallet and the totally desirable $15 I had. I didn’t want to die because of $15.

So I was rather surprised when whoever it was immediately stepped away from me, once they regained their balance, and cheerfully said, “Oh, sorry about that!”

My heart was racing so fast it was hard to concentrate, so all I could manage was a breathless, “Don’t worry about it.”

It hit me who I’d just spoken to when they shot a freaking web and swung away from me, back into the alley they’d come out of. The sleek red and blue suit looked so obvious now that my brain was working again. I could see several more figures in the dim lighting that looked rather intimidating.

That was Spider-Man. Local, crime-fighting hero who’d been protecting the city for something like four years now. I knew about him of course, but I’d only lived in New York City for just over six months. I’d noticed pretty quickly that New York loved their masked vigilante - well, the majority did anyway. Though I’d seen plenty of footage of his heroics, I’d never seen him in person.

Well, that had changed now. I jerked out of my thoughts and realised I’d been just standing dumbstruck in the middle of the street, staring down into the alley. Spider-Man was still in the middle of fighting and now that I was paying attention, the fight was happening way too close for my liking. With one final glance, I continued walking.

The rest of my walk home passed by in a blur. The wind still blew past me, chilling my skin, but I barely felt it. I fumbled with my keys, trying to unlock my front door, and it took me way too long to realise I was trying to use my work key to unlock my apartment.

The apartment was empty when I managed to get inside; Emily was working odd hours this week and wouldn’t be home until 2 or 3 in the morning. I couldn’t remember if she was staying over at her girlfriend’s and if she was, she wouldn’t be home at all until tomorrow. I was grateful for the solitude. My mind still hadn’t caught up with everything yet and there was no way Emily wouldn’t have noticed something was off.

Before I could even debate on whether to shower or eat first, my stomach grumbled loudly, winning the argument before it even had a chance to start. The air conditioner was broken… again, so I left my jacket on as I dropped off my things in my room and continued into the kitchen. The landlord seemed to be getting sick of our complaints about it but, instead of getting it fixed once again or just replacing the unit altogether (which had to be way more cost effective), he seemed to be just ignoring us completely. Since this was my first apartment and Emily’s as well, we were unsure of what to do about it and too broke to find another apartment, so we just put up with the chilly apartment.

Despite the ease of grilled cheese, there were still too many steps involved. My stomach didn’t seem prepared to wait the extra few minutes it would take me to create the ‘home cooked meal’. I added some water to the cardboard noodle pot and put it in the microwave, watching the digital numbers count down until finally, it beeped.

I watched the TV while I ate, but I was only half paying attention. They were running another Harry Potter marathon and, while normally I’d be down to watch the movies again, my mind just couldn’t seem to stay focused on the screen for longer than a minute at a time. My thoughts just kept going back to that two-second interaction with the masked hero.

Finally, I gave up on my attempts to watch the movie. My food had gone cold before I’d finished eating, thanks to my unusually slow pace and the cold apartment. I dumped the empty container in the bin and headed to our tiny bathroom to shower. The hot water was a very welcome escape from the cold and for a solid minute, I didn’t even move. I just stood there enjoying the steaming hot water running down my body. Once I had warmed up, I actually began my shower.

I lifted my arm to grab something off the shower caddy we had hung over the glass wall. Then I froze.

I had the words on my left wrist completely memorised, from the colour to the size to the font to the words themselves. And if someone asked me to recreate them, I knew I could do it beyond a shadow of a doubt.

Soulwords always stood out on the skin and mine were no different. If the person’s skin was light, then the words would be dark. If the person’s skin was dark, then the words would be light. And even if the skin was in the middle, the words always managed to stand out on the skin.

Now, my words almost matched my skin colour, just a shade or two different. I could just barely see them.

There was only one thing that made a person's soulwords change colour.

My words had been spoken.

It seemed impossible to me that I hadn’t noticed. I was completely dumbfounded, my eyes locked on my wrist. I’d always been told I would feel something when my words were finally said aloud, but I’d felt nothing. Did the physical sensation only affect some people or… had I been too out of it in that moment to feel it?

It hit me.

Oh my fucking god .

That entire walk home something had felt off. Then he bumped into me - fucking Spider-Man bumped into me - and he’d said, “Oh, sorry about that”.

It was such an unimportant interaction in the grand scheme of things, such an everyday exchange of words that nobody would have even thought to focus on. But that was it. That was the interaction. I’d met my soulmate.

And my soulmate was fucking Spider-Man.

I realised I was still in the shower with the water hitting my back and running down my still outstretched arm. With shaking hands, I turned off the water and stepped out, pulling my giant fluffy towel around my body. The cold of the apartment bombarded me again and I shivered.

I dried off quickly, probably only half clean, and pulled my pyjamas on. It wasn’t even 7 yet, but I felt exhausted.

“I know who my soulmate is… but I have no freaking idea who my soulmate is…” I spoke the words aloud, forming each word slowly to try and process the information.

My mind immediately filled with questions. They were questions that I’d had every now and then throughout my life, but I never thought I’d still have them after meeting my soulmate.

What’s his name? How old is he? What colour is his hair, his eyes?

And a new question: How the fuck was Spider-Man my soulmate?

And more importantly, how was I going to find him again and how was I going to convince him we were soulmates? Our words were so commonplace that it was possible for the words “Don’t worry about it” to have been said to him like three times that day before I’d said it. What if he didn’t believe me? Just going up to him and announcing that I was his soulmate sounded like an absolutely terrible idea. He’d probably think I was a nutcase.

I groaned loudly and collapsed face down on my bed, the plush duvet providing a soft landing. When the position grew uncomfortable after a few minutes, I dragged myself to the head of the bed and slid under the covers.

Sleep did not come easily and when it did, it was restless and filled with nightmarish dreams of rejection, humiliation, and loneliness.

* * * * * * * *

The next few days passed slowly. I wore either long sleeved clothing or a lot of bracelets the entire time, never letting Emily get a glimpse of my wrist. Luckily, she never seemed suspicious of my actions.

Every day, I had thought about going out and finding him. I thought about how I’d approach him and what I’d say to him. I wondered if he’d noticed his soulwords had changed. I wondered if he knew it was me, if he knew I was his soulmate, or if he had no idea at all. He had been in the middle of a fight; it was possible he didn’t even remember that exchange since he’d absolutely had more pressing matters at hand. Was he confused, with no clues to his soulmate’s identity and no hope of a do-over because once the words were spoken that was it.

I tried not to think of that possibility. It hurt too much - a deep ache in my chest that was impossible to ignore.

Whether that possibility was true or not (ow…), I would have to be the one to make the first move. We both had pieces of information about the other. He knew my face, but not my name. I knew his name (well, sort of), but not his face. My information was much more likely to get the two of us acquainted.

And yet, for close to a week, I did nothing. I stayed in my apartment, only leaving for my shifts at work or to get groceries with Emily. Plus, the mechanic had finished with my car, cutting into my savings much more than I had hoped, so I wasn’t even walking to and from work anymore. Emily suggested selling the car to find a better apartment, which wasn’t a bad suggestion. It had been a gift from my parents on my 16th. It wasn’t anything flashy, an old sedan they’d gotten cheap from a friend of a friend. Now that I lived in New York though, it probably would make more sense to use public transportation.

It was excuses and tangents like that that kept me in my apartment as much as possible for that week. My excuses only got me so far though and eventually, I told myself I was just being a coward.

So when I headed out for work the next day, I ignored my car completely and walked to the coffee shop. For the entire shift, I stayed as optimistic as I could. The old lady’s complaint of the day (“These coffee beans weren’t ground finely enough! Do you even grind your own beans?”) came close to ruining my mood since I was forced to deal with her on my own after my co-worker vanished into the back. I took a deep breath and forced my customer service smile on my face. Every repetition of “Hi, welcome to The Grind. What can I get for you today?” brought me closer to leaving.

Just after 7pm, we closed up the shop, politely chasing out the stragglers and I began the walk home. The sun hadn’t set yet, though it was getting close. Either way, it wasn’t visible, blocked by all the high rises, leaving the streets bathed in shadows. The street lamps blinked on as I walked, my hands shoved into my jacket pockets. I kept an eye out for the hero, thinking that if I did see him it was likely he’d be leaping between buildings or swinging from a high rise.

I didn’t expect to see him just on the street, just a few minutes later.

“You didn’t have to buy me a churro, Mr. Lee. I do appreciate it though!”

My heart skipped a beat and I stumbled forward, tripping over absolutely nothing. There he was, right in front of me.

My soulmate.

He hadn’t spotted me yet, still chatting with the old man who’d bought him a churro. This was supposed to be the time I’d come up with words, something… anything to start up a conversation. But nope. Nothing. I still hadn’t moved, my body bent over slightly from tripping.

It was only when he waved goodbye to the old man and raised his arm like he was about to swing away that I jerked myself forward.

“Wait!” I cried, my voice coming out squeaky. “Uhh, wait please!”

He glanced over at me, dropping his arm. “Oh, hi! Is there something you needed help with?”

“I… uhh…” Man, words would be great right now. Any words would do. Something to make him think I’m not a psychopath. I gripped my left wrist so tightly it was almost painful.

To his credit, he was patient. I couldn’t see his facial expressions of course, but he wasn’t sighing or hurrying me along which was much appreciated.

I cleared my throat, ready to try again. “Okay… so, I need to t-talk to you about something, but it’s… kinda private.”

“Hmm… okay.” He nodded slowly, stroking his jaw thoughtfully with his gloved fingers, then pointed upwards. “We could always chat on the roof of one of these buildings. You’d have to hold onto me though and the trip might be a bit intimidating. Are you okay with that?”

“Yeah, that’s fine,” I said, pushing down the wave of fear that rose up at his words. “Is now fine?”

“Absolutely!” He agreed. “I’m going to have to carry you, so is it okay for me to touch you?”

“Oh uh… yeah, that’s fine,” I stammered, hating the slight flush I could feel heating up my face.

“I think the easiest way to do this would be if you wrapped your arms around my neck and held on tight,” he suggested.

I took a hesitant step towards him. “Make sure you don’t drop me,” I warned him shakily.

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” he promised, crossing a tiny X over his heart with his finger.

He sounded so genuinely sincere that I couldn’t help but believe him. I closed the last few steps between us, all too aware of the curious eyes pointed in our direction, and wrapped my arms around his neck. Despite his words, I left them somewhat loose, though I doubted I could actually hurt him. My blush only deepened when he looped his arm around my waist, pulling me closer against him.

“Ready?” he asked. I suppressed a shiver as he spoke close to my ear. When I nodded, he repeated, “Hold on tight.”

My reaction could have been more dignified. There was a quiet hiss, then the ground vanished from under my feet. I let out a high pitched squeak and buried my face in his neck. His arm kept me securely in place, like the metal bar on roller coasters. My stomach felt like it had been left behind on the ground.

Sooner than I expected, we’d scaled the building. It took me a second to make sure it was safe to let go before I unravelled my arms from his beck.

“How high up are we?” I asked, glancing around. The sun was still hidden by high rises, but it was much brighter on the roof of the building than it was down on the streets.

“About… maybe ten to fifteen storeys up,” he replied. “So what do you need to talk to me about?”

I leaned back against an air conditioning unit, breathing in slowly. ‘Okay so I’m nervous as hell but I’ve been putting this conversation off for like a week so I really need to just come out and say it.” I took in another deep, slow breath, contradicting my rambled words. “I think I’m your… no, I know I’m your soulmate.”

The words hung in the air between us. The mask hid all his visible reactions and he was completely still, eyes locked on me - or well, I assumed they were. I’d never really understood the phrase ‘deafening silence’ before, but this moment fit that phrase perfectly. Every second that passed more and more weight onto my shoulders and it definitely felt like it was getting harder to breathe.

Oh god, what if he just webbed away and disappeared, leaving me trapped up on some random building? No… he seemed too nice to do something like that, but fuck was this going to be an awkward trip down…

After the longest 30 seconds of my life, he cleared his throat and shuffled his feet awkwardly. “Okay, so that’s not what I was expecting… at all.”

“What were you expecting?” I asked, sounding every bit as anxious and disappointed as I felt.

“My guess was that you were in an abusive relationship and were too scared to go to the cops, so you figured you’d confide in me and hope I could help out,” he explained. “It’s happened before.”

I slowly shook my head. “Uh… nope.”

He let out a long breath of air. “Well, this is my first soulmate claim so… uh… forgive me if I ask for some proof.”

“Well, my words changed a week ago, after bumping into you. You were in the middle of a fight so it wouldn’t surprise me if you didn’t notice immediately. I know I didn’t and I wasn’t even fighting,” I laughed quietly; there wasn’t a lot of humour to the sound. “You stumbled into me and said ‘Oh, sorry about that’, to which I replied ‘Don’t worry about it’. Not the most exciting or memorable of meetings, but yeah… that was it. It was only when I got home that I noticed the change.”

He didn’t reply, instead walking over after a second of hesitation and resting next to me against the air conditioner. He held his right arm out, his forearm pointed upwards. The suit almost… melted away to reveal a pale hand and wrist. And written there, barely visible, were the words ‘Don’t worry about it’.

There was another beat of silence as I processed the words on his wrist. “Well… I feel slightly better than I did a minute ago. I feel slightly less… crazy, if that makes sense.”

He chuckled quietly. “Yeah… I get that. Can I see yours?”

I nodded, feeling a lot lighter now that the weight had lifted from my shoulders. I pushed up my jacket, bunching it up around my elbow to expose my words to him. We were silent, looking back and forth between our wrists, at the first words we’d ever spoken to each other without even knowing the significance of them.

“This is not how I wanted this to happen at all,” he sighed.

Ah, there was that weight again. “W-what do you mean?”

With his left hand, he pointed to his face, covered by red spandex (probably not spandex, probably something insanely expensive designed by Tony Stark). “I wanted to meet my soulmate outside of the suit. I wanted for them… for you to be able to know me as… as not Spider-Man, at least at first. Then when I was ready, I could tell you about this side of my life.”

I looked down, half tempted to wrap my fingers around my wrist to cover up the soulwords written there, the ones that were causing him this pain. “I-I’m sorry.”

He immediately shook his head, before I’d even finished speaking. “No, please don’t apologise. I didn’t mean to say that like I was blaming you or anything. I just felt like this would have been easier on you if you met the real me versus meeting the masked me.”

“How do you want to do all this?” I asked, glancing over at him. “I mean… like you said, this isn’t the way this kind of thing is normally done. So uhh… you can be in control of pace and everything. I want you to be comfortable.”

He laughed weakly. “Thank you, I appreciate that. I kind of feel like an asshole though. It feels horrible to say that I don’t trust you, my fucking soulmate, enough to tell you my name or show you my face or anything like that.”

I reached out and touched his wrist, just over his words. We both sucked in a breath when our bare skin touched, the first time it had ever happened. It felt like a sparkler touching my fingertips or like static electricity. It only lasted for a split second, but I definitely felt it.

It took me a few seconds to recover and while my brain worked to remember how to speak, I stroked my fingers slowly across his wrist. When I finally found words again, my voice was quiet. “For what it’s worth, I don’t think you’re an asshole. If we put aside the whole soulmate thing, you’ve known me for about ten minutes. You wouldn’t tell a stranger Spider-Man’s real identity after only knowing them for that long and I mean, I really am just a stranger.”

He pulled his arm backward, then entwined his fingers with mine. “You’re more than just a stranger though. Or you will be.”

I blushed again, a smile tugging at my lips. “I’d like to be.”

“I’d like that too.” From the sound of his voice, it sounded like he was smiling too.

A question popped into my head. “Out of curiosity, did you notice right away? That your soulwords had changed, I mean.”

“Not immediately,” he replied. “After that night, I was super tired and I was asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow. I slept past my alarm the next morning and I noticed it when I was hurriedly trying to get ready. I was so freaked out that I was even later to work. Luckily my boss is fairly laid back though, so he wasn’t that mad about it.”

“Wait, so you have a job on top of all the superheroing you do?” My eyes widened in disbelief. “How do you have time to do anything?”

He laughed, a beautiful, rich sound that I didn’t think I would ever get tired of hearing. “You have no idea. Luckily, I can survive on limited amounts of sleep otherwise I think I would have gone crazy years ago.”

“Just ‘survive’? I don’t know if I like the sound of that…” I bit my lip anxiously. “I know your heroing is really important, but it looks so stressful and tiring and if you’re just on surviving levels of sleep-” I broke off, a sudden realisation hitting me. “Oh god, sorry. It’s not my place to be saying stuff like that at all…”

He stroked his thumb across the back of my hand. “Nah, I think it’s cute. You know, that you’re worried about me. But it’s fine. I’ve found a pretty good balance between this life,” he gestured to his suit with his free hand, “and my everyday life.” He paused, staring down at our joined hands. “This… does complicate things though.”

“Yeah?”

“It looks like it’s time for me to worry about you,” he laughed, not as cheerfully as he had before. “The truth is… being involved with Spider-Man, romantically or not, is dangerous. There are a lot of people who… don’t like me very much, which is putting it very lightly, and I’m sure some of them would be very willing to use you to get to me.” He tightened his grip slightly, not enough to be painful. “I can’t even describe how much I don’t want that to happen, how much I can’t have that happen. Obviously I’ve just met you, but you’re… important to me. I mean, you’re my soulmate.”

I thought about his words for a few seconds. Hearing the half hidden fear in his voice made the threat seem a lot more real. “What do you want to do then? I know it’s dangerous, but I can’t just walk away from you. I’ve… I’ve only just found you.”

“I promise I’ll figure something out,” he said. There was another stretch of silence before he finally said, “If I… give you my number, can I trust you with it?”

“Of course!” I did my best to sound reassuring. “I would never betray your trust like that.”

“You know that’s exactly what someone who would betray me would say,” he pointed out.

Well… he had me there. “Okay that may be true, but you can trust me. I care way more about getting to know my soulmate and proving myself to them than spreading Spider-Man’s number around. You only get one soulmate and I don’t want to screw this up.”

"That sounds like a shitty version of YOLO: You only soulmate once.” I could practically hear his grin.

“That doesn’t even make sense!”

“It doesn’t have to!”

I pulled my phone out of my pocket and opened up the ‘add a new contact’ page. “Just give me your number, you weirdo, before I change my mind.”

“Oh no, you’re stuck with me now.” He quickly rattled off his number and I sent him a test text to make sure I’d gotten it right. A cheerful tone sounded from somewhere in his suit. “Save me as SM or something like that. So that if someone looks at our messages, it’s not immediately obvious who you’re texting.”

I typed in the letters and asked, “SM for Spider-Man?”

“Oh… damn, I meant SM for soulmate,” he chuckled. “I mean, if it works for both, might as well go for it, right?”

“It seems pretty fitting,” I agreed, slipping my phone back in my pocket.

“I should probably get back to work,” he sighed, turning his head to look into the distance. The sun seemed to have finally set and the shadows had started climbing up the sides of the buildings. “This is usually when people start to commit crimes and cause general menace and I’m sure they’ll notice if I don’t show up.”

“Okay, I suppose that’s a pretty fair reason,” I nodded. “Can I get a lift down or should I give building abseiling with no equipment a shot?”

He pondered my words, a finger resting thoughtfully against his chin. “As amusing and terrifying as that sounds, I would prefer to just drop you off at the bottom.”

“Such a gentleman.” I fluttered my eyelashes and fanned myself with my hand, pretending to swoon.

“It’s important to me for you to know that I’m rolling my eyes at you,” he pointed out.

“Shouldn’t you be in a hurry to go save the city?” I raised an eyebrow at him.

“There is always time for eye rolling.” He pushed away from the aircon unit, stretching his limbs out. As he moved, the material around his arm crept silently over his skin and covered his words again, leaving no visible seams or lines at all.

“Alright, alright,” I relented. “I do want to say that… I know this isn’t the way you wanted this to happen, but I’m really happy that I’ve finally met you.”

“I’m really glad I met you too!” He paused his languid stretches to glance back at me, then he paused. “Also I feel like kind of an asshole, but I just realised I didn’t ask for your name.”

I giggled. “Oh, I totally forgot too. It’s (Y/N).”

“(Y/N)...” He spoke my name slowly, like he was absorbing every letter and sound of it to memory. “That’s a pretty name. I’m sorry I can’t tell you mine yet.”

“Seriously, it’s okay,” I assured him. “Right now, it’s enough for me to just have met you.”

“This is true. We’ve finished the first step,” he laughed. “Are you ready to head down?”

We walked over to the edge of the building and I peered down over it. My stomach wasn’t a fan of the view and I looked back at him. “I’m holding you to your promise.”

“I’m not going to drop you!” He protested, sounding like he was pouting.

“I’m kidding, I know you won’t,” I smiled, still a teensy bit nauseous. “But I wouldn’t mind if the next place we meet up is a bit closer to the ground.”

He nodded. “I’ll see what I can do. So, down?”

“Down.”

I reached up and wrapped my arms around his neck, exactly like I’d done on the trip up, and his arm immediately curled around my waist. The position felt far more intimate and tender now that he knew I was his soulmate. His hand felt warm and comforting against my body. He wasn’t touching my skin at all, but I felt very connected to him. I felt safer and more content than I had in a long time.

That feeling of safety didn’t vanish when I felt him step off the side of the building, though my stomach protested, of course, and I kept my eyes closed. The trip down felt slower, like he was drawing out the amount of time he could have me in his arms. My heart started doing flips and I really, really hoped that was the reason the journey down felt longer.

Finally, far too quickly, we were back on the sidewalk again. We both lingered for a few seconds, not entirely willing to part immediately, but we pulled apart before we garnered too much attention. For what felt like the millionth time, I was blushing.

“Do you want me to walk you home?” he asked, letting his arm fall back against his side. I felt slightly colder now that I was away from him.

“As much as I would like to say yes, that would probably cause a bit more interest in me than we want, right?” I replied quietly.

“Oh… yeah, good point,” he nodded slowly. “I’ll… I’ll text you, okay?”

“Yeah, definitely,” I smiled. “Well uhh… enjoy heroing.”

“You too! I mean…” he stammered, sounding adorably awkward. “Umm… Never mind. I’ll see you later.”

I chuckled and gave him a little wave. “Bye.”

A second later, he was off, disappearing into the sky and around the side of a building. I stood there, staring after him, then resumed my walk home.

It was actually a nice feeling to know that he was more than just Spider-Man. Having a superhero as a soulmate - and it was very weird to now be a part of that club, alongside someone like Pepper Potts - felt very intimidating. For the past week, he’d seemed to be on another level from me, like I was an ordinary human and he was on the same level as the Avengers. But now that I’ve officially met him and to know that’s human - knowing he fumbles his words, makes horrible jokes and is adorably sweet - definitely made me feel better.

And once I saw his face and met him properly, well… if that one conversation was anything to go off of, I could very easily see myself falling for him.

Chapter Text

SM: Did you get home safe?

Me: Yep! It was quite a lovely walk. Much more peaceful than I’m sure your time’s been.

SM: Actually it’s been surprisingly quiet! Kinda wish I’d stayed with you a little longer.

Ahh yep. Heart skipped a beat again. So… this was becoming a thing now, huh?

Me: Aww, you’re sweet! We’ll have to just hang out longer next time, won’t we? 😊

SM: I’m okay with that 😁

* * * * * * * *

SM: So what do you do to occupy your time? Work? Study? None of the above?

Me: I’m currently working at a coffee shop bakery kind of place right now. It’s not a bad job, I can’t complain

SM: Like a Starbucks or a smaller place?

Me: Nah, not Starbucks. It’s a cute little locally opened shop called The Grind. Prioritises using local products and all that jazz

SM: It sounds nice! And I have to admit I’m a fan of the name

Me: Ahh… so you’re a pun person?

SM: Is there any other way to live???

Me: I find them to be punbearable

SM: …

SM: Weeeeeaaaaaaaaak

Me: Oh shhh, don’t be mean to me

SM: I’ll give you a pass this time, but we have to work on your pun game

Me: Oh yeah that’s really the main area in life that I’m lacking

SM: I mean… I didn’t want to say anything… but yeah 😇

Me: I never would have expected my soulmate to be so cruel… 😭

SM: Well now I feel bad!

Me: How could this happen to meeeeeeeee

Me: I’ve made my mistaaaaaaaakes

SM: Did… did you just…

SM: I don’t feel bad anymore

* * * * * * * *

“Okay, seriously, tell me.”

“Huh?” I glanced up from my phone to look at Emily. She had her elbows resting on the kitchen counter, her head propped up on her open palm. “What are you talking about?”

“You’ve been staring at your phone for days now, all dreamy eyed and smiling like an idiot,” she replied, a playful smirk on her face. One of her pigtails fell over her shoulder, the long black hair tickling her face, and she pushed it back with her free hand. “Who’re you talking to?”

“Oh, nobody.” My cheeks hated me apparently because I felt them heat up immediately. “Just a friend.”

Her eyes searched my face, flicking down to my hands still clutching my phone. It flashed with another message from him, my text alert chirping happily. I covered the screen with my hand. Her smirk grew. “A friend, huh? Is that so?”

“Yep, that’s all,” I said, doing my best to appear casual and unaffected and of course completely failing. I looked over at the clock on the wall, forcing a shocked expression on my face. “Is that the time? Crap, I’ll be late for work.”

“You told me your shift started at 11 this morning,” she pointed out. “It’s not even 9 yet.”

“I forgot to say that my boss wanted me to start early. Whoops!” I darted into my room, shutting the door a tiny bit too loudly.

“Real smooth there, champ!” Emily called after me. “Totally convincing!”

* * * * * * * *

Despite my unusually early start to my shift, my workday went fairly smoothly. Grumpy old lady came in and found something to complain about pretty much immediately (“This table hasn’t been cleaned properly!”). I cleared away the terribly offensive single grain of sugar and headed out the back to help Tyler with the next batch of pastries.

As I dusted cooling baked goods with powdered sugar, I heard the front door open. I finished one tray and moved on to the next one, stepping slightly out of the way so Tyler could place another tray on the counter next to me.

A wall separated the cooking area from the storefront, but there was a window we could look through. Through the window, I could see a guy with fluffy looking brown hair browsing the selection of baked goods while the barista, Evan, made his coffee. He was gorgeous, with a very dorky kind of adorableness to him. I based that judgement entirely on the shirt he was wearing: a black tee with ‘Don’t trust atoms - they make up everything’.

The latest batch was ready so I loaded them up on a tray and carefully carried them to the front, using my back to push through the swinging door. The guy looked up from the display when I came out; his chocolate brown eyes locked onto mine and my heart skipped a beat. Jesus Christ, was this guy cute or what?

I walked over to the glass display and placed each muffin, cupcake, croissant, and danish in its proper spot, doing my best to focus on the task. My mind flashed to Spider-Man (god, knowing his name would be so much easier because just saying Spider-Man made the whole thing feel crazy) and I bit my lip, hit with a feeling of guilt. When I finished stocking everything back up, the guy was still looking into the case.

“See anything you like?” I asked.

Well if that wasn’t flirting… If I’d been alone, I would have slapped my hand against my forehead. The words had just slipped out, much more flirtatious than my usual “Can I help you with anything?”

Oblivious to my internal dilemma, the absolutely gorgeous guy opened his mouth to respond but then closed it and simply nodded. The light flush on his cheeks didn’t help anything either and just made him look even more freaking adorable.

Before I could ask if he wanted anything from the case, Evan finished the two coffees and handed them over. The guy grabbed them with an almost inaudible, “Thank you”. He glanced at me, looked like he was about to say something, then smiled and walked out of the store.

I stared after him for a few seconds before realising Evas staring at me, one perfectly waxed and manicured eyebrow raised.

“What?” I mumbled, looking down at the countertop and starting to wipe away nonexistent dust.

“What. On Earth. Was that?” he asked, sounding entirely too amused.

I shook my head. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I know he can talk since he was talking completely normally, but as soon as you came out, he was completely stunned silent!” Evan exclaimed, his voice a little too loud for my liking.

“Would you be quiet?” I hissed, discreetly pointing to where the old lady was still sitting. She hadn’t been so subtle about her eavesdropping but was now pretending to be very interested in the menu in front of her.

“Okay, okay,” he chuckled, lowering his voice so that only I could hear him. “But girl, seriously. Either that man has a serious crush on you or he found you bizarrely and immediately intimidating. And I think we both know which one is more likely.”

“Evaaaaaan,” I whined. “Please drop it.”

“I’ll consider it… if you cover my shift on Saturday,” he offered with a mischievous grin.

“What is it now?” I asked, fairly used to his infrequent requests.

“Joel got his hands on some insanely good concert tickets, but the show is a few hours drive north,” he explained excitedly. His eyes lit up like they always did when he talked about music. When I didn’t reply immediately, his tone turned pleading. “Pleeeaaase? You know I wouldn’t ask you to unless it was a really good reason!”

“Alright fine!” I agreed. “But we’re square after this.”

“Absolutely! You’re the best, oh my god,” he cheered, scooping me up into a massive hug. I could almost feel the old lady eyeing us disapprovingly.

* * * * * * * *

Normally, whenever I’d get texts or calls from an unknown number, I tended to ignore them. But the text I got at 3:32am on Saturday morning was intriguing. In an odd sort of way. I blinked, still half asleep and glanced at my phone, which was still chirping with new notification sounds.

Unknown Number: So our mutual acquaintance has told me of your situation

Unknown Number: You know, the insect one

Unknown Number: Oh wait, arachnid one. He gets annoyed when I say insect. What a nerd

Unknown Number: Anyway, I think I have a solution for you

Me: I’ve heard double texting makes you sound desperate, so I don’t even want to know what quadruple texting means.

Yeah, not the normal kind of reply I’d sent. Well normally I wouldn’t reply to unknown numbers at all, but it was the middle of the night and I was tired and maybe a little bit snappy.

Unknown Number: Wow, feisty. I’m just trying to help out, be a nice guy and all

Me: It’s the middle of the night.

Me: Who is this anyway?

Unknown Number: Oh, did I not say?

Unknown Number: This is Tony. Tony Stark.

Oh god, it was way too early/late to be dealing with this shit.

Me: Uh huh. Right. Okay. I’m going back to sleep.

With that, I turned my phone to silent mode and rolled over. Sleep found me again rather quickly. When I woke a few hours later, I had another message from ‘Tony Stark’. I ignored it, scoffing quietly at the idea that the billionaire would text me.

Staying in bed and sleeping in sounded so much better than going to work… again. But the money was somewhat convincing, emphasis on somewhat. So I dragged myself out of bed and into the shower to force myself to be fully awake. When I got out, Emily, the absolute gem she was, had made me breakfast. It was still hot and looked absolutely delicious, despite the fact that it was only some toast and eggs. While I grazed on my food, I texted Spider-Man.

Me: Hey, so weird thing that happened this morning…

I screenshotted the conversation between me and the unknown number and sent it to SM. The latest message from ‘Tony’ was a shocked looking emoji. He didn’t reply to my message so I got ready for work and then quickly forgot about it when work got insanely busy. Finally, on my break a couple hours later, I checked my phone. My mouth dropped open.

SM: Uhh yeah so that was actually Tony Stark. I was explaining everything to him yesterday and I guess he figured out something that might work for us? But yeah. Really him.

SM: I didn’t give him your number, but I mean, yeah he’s Tony Stark.

Me: You’re fucking kidding me

Me: Did I seriously tell Tony Stark that he’s worse than desperate????? 😳 ☠️

SM: Yes. Yes, you did.

Me: Kill me now.

Me: Seriously, just end me.

SM: I’m afraid I can’t do that. I’m too fond of you.

SM: Plus I think it would be bad for my image if I killed someone. I usually try to avoid that

A few minutes later, my phone rang. SM appeared on the screen along with the Spider picture I’d put as his profile picture.

“Hello,” I answered, still feeling somewhat dazed and confused.

“Hey.” I could hear the smile in his voice. “It’s good to hear your voice.”

“Aww, it’s good to hear yours too.” He seemed to have a way of immediately making me feel better. I wasn’t sure if it was because he was my soulmate or if that was just his personality. “I don’t have too much time left on my break though.”

“Oh right. I’ll get to the point then,” he laughed quietly. “I talked to Tony and he said that we could meet at Stark Tower. It’s not odd for me to be seen popping in and out of there and if we get you a badge, no one will look twice at you. If anyone asks, we can say you’re going through an extended interview process.”

“Tony Stark is inviting me to Stark Tower?” I asked incredulously.

“Yep!” He exaggerated the word with a popping sound. “You can come over whenever. We just have to get the badge sorted which honestly takes like five minutes. If you send me a clear picture of you, I can send it to Tony and get it done right now.”

“So… if I wanted to… I could come over today?” My voice was hesitant, worried I’d come across needy.

“If you wanted to, then yeah, of course,” he confirmed. “Not gonna lie, I would like that a lot.”

“Let’s do it then. I want to see you,” I said. “My shift finishes at 5 today.”

“Do you want to come over just after your shift or do you want to stop by your house first?” he asked.

“I think I want to go home first, so I can shower and change out of my work clothes,” I decided. “Can I pick up my badge when I get there?”

“I’ll call Tony and work out the details,” he said. “This will give me time to get there and change into my work clothes.”

I grinned. “Awesome. I have to get back to work, but I’ll send you the picture right now.”

“Perfect, I’ll get things sorted for you,” he told me. “I can’t wait to see you!”

“Me too. Alright, talk soon. Bye!”

We hung up and I snapped a few pictures of me. It took a while to find good enough lighting and it took a few tries to take a picture that looked serious, but not too serious. After about five minutes, I took one I was happy with and sent it to him. Then I texted Tony.

Me: Umm… so sorry for thinking you were fake…

Me: And for calling you desperate…

The rest of my shift was fairly relaxed (friendly customers, easy orders, a few nice conversations), aka the best kind of shift. I even got some tips, so that was a positive. And I had a reply from the apparently real Tony Stark (yeah, still hard to wrap my head around).

Tony: Oh shit. Double text. Desperate.

Me: Okay, yeah I deserve that. Am I still invited over or did I fuck this up?

Tony: Hmm… well, Spidey-boy seems to like you and I’m fond of the kid, so… against my better judgement, the offer is still there. When you get here, talk to the receptionist and she’ll give you your badge. Do you want a ride? I can send a car to your apartment.

Me: I don’t want to impose more than I already am. I’ll just drive myself over

Tony: Fair enough. Head up to the penthouse when you get here. You have to swipe the badge in the elevator to get access. I’m trusting you here, kid, so no snooping.

Me: So does that mean I can’t steal an Iron Man suit?

Tony: Honestly, if you managed to steal one, I would be impressed

Tony: … that wasn’t a challenge

Me: It kind of feels like a challenge

Tony: Thin ice, kid. Thin. Ice.

* * * * * * * *

After dodging Emily’s inquisition (“You’re going out ?! You never go out! I have so many questions. You’re being uncharacteristically secretive! C’mon, please!”) for the whole 20 minutes I was in the apartment, including my short shower, the car ride to the Tower was blissfully silent. Aside from the non-stop anxious commentary in my brain, of course. Like did this count as a date or was this a platonic hanging out kind of thing? I ran into my fifth red light of the trip - they always seemed to change right as I got up to them - and I crossed my fingers that that bad luck wouldn’t continue for the rest of the evening.

Finding a car park at the Tower was relatively easy since it was getting late. Being at the Tower felt odd; I’d always seen it on TV and to actually be standing in it felt really strange. The receptionist was nice enough and getting my badge was as easy as Tony said it would be. She pointed me towards the elevator and then I experienced the longest elevator ride I’ve ever been on in my entire life. All the walls in the elevator, aside from the door, were entirely covered in spotless mirrors, which made it extremely easy to see how nervous but also excited I looked.

Literally everything in the Tower looked expensive, from the artwork to the furniture and even the plants. It was honestly pretty intimidating, especially when coming straight from my shitty apartment with busted air conditioning and second or even third-hand furniture. I slowly breathed in and out, working on calming myself down. Then the elevator doors slid open, a robotic voice announcing I’d reached the penthouse level.

The doors opened up to reveal what looked like an entertaining area, complete with a large bar and a sunken couch area. The dark stone floorings and dark elegant furnishings contrasted with a light brown stone feature wall and stone railings on the far side of the room. It was an interesting mix of rustic and modern that I would have never thought to put together, but somehow it just worked. The dark elements of the space had another effect as well. It drew the eye to the stunning city views through an entire wall of floor to ceiling windows.

I took a hesitant step into the penthouse, mostly just so that I would be out of the elevator, which closed quietly behind me. My footstep sounded unnaturally loud against the large stone tile and the heavy silence left me with a shrill ringing in my ears. I felt even more out of place in this room than I had down in the lobby. My single step inside revealed no other presence in the immediate area.

“Where is he?” I wondered quietly to myself.

To my shock, I actually got a reply.

“Mr Stark is currently in the lab. He has been informed of your arrival and wants me to tell you to get comfortable and make yourself at home.” It was the same voice from the elevator: a polite, female, robotic voice.

I glanced around the room, searching for a panel or speaker or anything to tell me where the voice was coming from. “Who… I mean… what…”

“I am Mr Stark’s AI. You may call me Friday,” she replied.

“Umm okay. Thank you Friday,” I greeted, uncertainly. “Do you know where Spider-Man is?”

“I have been informed he is running late but will be arriving shortly.”

“Alright, I’ll just… wait over here,” I said, making my way over to the black leather couches.

The leather creaked slightly as I sat down on it, but to my surprise, it wasn’t uncomfortable. I’d always thought leather couches would be stiff and terrible for anything other than looking expensive. I passed the time by looking around the entertaining space some more. The feeling of being out of place lingered, but having Tony’s approval to be here, despite having never met me, helped ease it slightly.

Finally, a few minutes later, Friday spoke up again. “Spider-Man will be arriving momentarily, via the balcony.”

I pushed myself off the couch and slowly walked through the large glass doors, leaving my small handbag behind. The balcony was interesting - a curved walkway going from the door I just walked through to another door at the end, leaving a void between the balcony and the windows. The other end of the balcony also connected to what appeared to be a landing pad but was far too small for a helicopter. The glass railings made it so that none of the view was blocked at all. The void in the balcony extended all the way to the bottom of the tower.

The view was honestly breathtaking. I could easily stand on this balcony and just gaze out over the city for hours. A sudden movement caught my attention though and immediately the lights were pushed out of my mind.

He swung up from a lower building, his movements looking completely effortless, then launched himself up onto the platform, landing in a flawless crouch. A total hero landing. His suit glinted from the lights inside. I rolled my eyes, but couldn’t stop the huge smile spreading across my face. He stood up and walked down off the platform and I met him in the middle.

“So you were ‘running late’, huh?” I smirked. “You sure that wasn’t just so I could see you showing off a little?”

“What? Nooooo…” he laughed, sounding totally convincing. Not. “I had to help my aunt out with something.”

“Uh huh, of course,” I replied. I was finished teasing him though, for now. “It’s good to see you again.”

“It’s good to see you too.”

I wished I could see his face. It wasn’t even to know who he was; it was just so I could see him . I wanted to know what colour his eyes were. Were they a darker colour, like a deep blue or a warm brown? Or were they light, like a sky blue, grey or green? I wanted to know whether his eyes crinkled at the corners when he smiled, whether he smiled all the time, whether he had dimples or not, whether he had freckles. Tiny little bits of knowledge that I was sure most people took for granted, but that I wanted more than anything.

“We should head inside,” he said, gesturing to the balcony doors.

His body language was confusing. The last time we’d met, once he’d known who I was, he seemed to want to touch me and to prolong those moments of contact. Now though, I hadn’t even gotten a hug or even a handshake. He walked to the door, holding it open for me.

“Friday, could you block the windows please?” He asked, his head tilted up slightly as if he was looking at the ceiling. “Curtains, dimming… something like that?”

“Of course,” the AI responded.

Immediately, the windows darkened. They didn’t go fully opaque, but they definitely blocked our view outside. He stared at them for a few seconds, moving his eyes to different panes of glass, then it was like a weight was lifted from his shoulders. He spun around and wrapped me in a tight hug, lifting me off the ground in his enthusiasm. I squealed, but his joyous laughter made the surprise worth it. When he lowered me down to the ground again, he left his arms circled around my waist. The moment from earlier didn’t even matter to me anymore; this was the moment when I wanted so desperately to see his smile.

“Not gonna lie, you’re reading a little hot and cold to me,” I confessed, slightly breathlessly.

“I know. I’m so sorry,” he sighed. “Things have been a little on edge on the whole Spider-Man side of things so I didn’t want to run the risk of someone seeing us.”

I nodded slowly. “Are you okay? Are you being targeted or something?”

“No no, please. I don’t want you to worry about that kind of thing,” he said, stroking my sides gently. “I want to focus on you and me.”

I looked at him shyly, a bubbly feeling rising in my chest. “You and me?”

He reached up to push some hair out of my eyes. “Yeah, if that’s okay with you.”

“It’s very okay with me,” I smiled.

We didn’t hear the elevator open behind us, but we definitely heard the voice. “Hey, kiddos! What are you feeling for dinner tonight?”

I stepped backwards out of Spider-Man’s arms, but he didn’t let me go too far. He caught my hand and entwined his fingers with mine, chuckling at my reaction.

“I’m not interrupting anything, am I?” Tony grinned. He wore a black tank top and dark blue jeans, only slightly dirty. His arms were crossed playfully across his chest.

“Oh no, of course not,” he replied, voice full of sarcasm.

“Good, glad to hear it.” I had the feeling that Tony would have replied that way even if Spidey had said yes. “So… dinner? Chinese, Italian, Mexican? Work with me here.”

“I’m feeling Chinese food.” His suited hand tugged me gently back to his side. “How about you?”

“Uhh yeah, that’s fine with me,” I told him.

“Any preferences?”

“No, anything you get will be fine, I’m sure,” I smiled.

“I’m getting you the weirdest thing on the menu,” Tony announced, looking way too enthusiastic about the idea.

“Be nice to her, Tony,” Spidey scolded. “She’s nervous.”

“Fine,” Tony sighed, pouting only slightly. “Second weirdest thing on the menu.”

I managed a quiet laugh. “Well, you tried at least.”

“Aww, she appreciates my effort! I feel all gooey inside,” Tony laughed, turning back to the elevator. “I’ll let you guys know when food arrives.”

Once the doors had closed and Tony was out of sight, I spoke again. “Is he always like that?”

“Oh yeah,” Spidey laughed. “You get used to it eventually.”

I smiled and leaned into his side a little more, savouring the feeling of his hand in mine. “So… what do you have planned for tonight?”

“Oh umm…” He paused for a few seconds. “To be honest, absolutely nothing. Yeah, I probably should have actually thought about this more. I was just so excited to see you…”

I hadn’t thought it was possible for this guy to get even cuter… but yep, even cuter. “You… I just… ahh. How are you this cute?” I hid my face in his chest so my words came out muffled.

“Awww!” He wrapped his arms around me again and rested his head on the top of my head. “You think I’m cute?”

“...No,” I muttered.

I felt his chest rumble as he laughed. “Nope, you said it. You can’t take it back!”

I mumbled again, more gibberish than an actual retort. In my defence, I was very distracted by the feel of his muscles. I wrapped my arms around his waist and just let myself feel him for a little while. He seemed to understand that and maybe need it as much as I did, if his peaceful breathing and gentle strokes of his fingers against my skin were anything to go off of. Logically, I knew it had only been just over a week since I’d seen him last, but my heart insisted it had been way longer. Texts and a phone call or two weren’t anywhere close to enough.

“If Tony… god that feels weird to say…” I laughed quietly. “If Tony is okay with it, can we make this a regular thing? Until you’re comfortable, that is.”

“I doubt he’ll have an issue with it. He jokes about being annoyed when I come over, but he’s really a softie,” he said. “Also… on the whole ‘comfortable’ topic…”

He didn’t speak for a few seconds, clearly nervous, so I didn’t interrupt his thoughts. Instead, I just rubbed my thumbs against the suit material, in a hopefully soothing way. When he did speak though, I wasn’t expecting his words at all.

“Peter.”

I lifted my head slightly to glance up at him, curiously. “Hmm?”

“My name,” he clarified. “It’s Peter. I won’t say my last name just yet, but… I wanted you to know.”

Even without a mirror, I knew that my whole face just lit up. My heart skipped a beat. “Well, it’s nice to meet you, Peter. Thank you for trusting me with that. It… it means a lot to me.”

“Of course. Honestly, that face just then made it worth it. That was honestly the cutest thing I’ve ever seen,” Peter (!!!!!!!!!) replied, his nervousness gone. “Plus, I’m sure it’s a lot less awkward than just thinking of me as Spider-Man.”

“Seriously,” I laughed. “It never felt real when I just thought of Spider-Man being my soulmate. Now that I know your name, it feels more… like this is really happening. I mean, obviously I didn’t think of you as just Spider-Man because that would have been seriously uncool and I’d hate you to think that that was all I thought of you as… aaaand I’m rambling…”

He shook his head once I’d finished. “Nah, I didn’t think that. I think this is just another step for us. Hopefully, the journey won’t take us too long, but we’ll get there in the end.”

“I’ve always heard that the journey matters more than the destination,” I said.

“That’s some fortune cookie wisdom right there,” Peter nodded. “But I suppose it’s accurate to this.”

“As great as all this standing is, can we sit on the couch?” I asked.

“I can keep cuddling you though, right?”

“Oh, absolutely.”

* * * * * * * *

The rest of the night passed fairly uneventfully. We stayed curled up on the couch together for the majority of the time, snacking on the Chinese food that Tony brought up for us. He even managed to limit his snarky jokes to a minimum, which I was honestly quite impressed by. Peter and I talked quietly together but weren’t bothered by the occasional silence either.

What happened at the end of the date though… that was certainly memorable.

I glanced at my phone when I heard it buzz. Emily had texted to ask how my night was going, apparently under the assumption that I was hooking up with someone considering how late it had gotten.

“Oh crap, I didn’t realise it was already past 12,” I groaned, stifling a coincidentally timed yawn.

“Wait, seriously?” he asked. “I would not have guessed that.”

“I guess I’d better head home.” Despite my words, I didn’t move at all. His arms stayed wrapped around me and my head stayed on his shoulder.

“Yeah? I’m sure Tony wouldn’t mind if you stayed over for the night. He has plenty of guest rooms you could use if you wanted,” he offered.

I sighed and shook my head. “As much as I want to say yes, I probably shouldn’t. Stark might get sick of me if I’m too imposing.”

“Well I appreciate that you do want to stay,” he admitted.

“I’d heard people talk about how being apart from their soulmate was difficult, but it’s a whole other thing to actually experience it,” I said, shivering lightly when his hand brushed over a ticklish spot on my side. “I wish I could stay with you longer.”

“I know. I’m going to talk to Tony to make sure he’s fine with you coming over again. Maybe once a week or so, for right now at least,” he replied. “We’ll see how things go.”

I nodded. “Okay, keep me updated please.”

“You know I will.”

“Well… I suppose I’d better get going before it gets even later,” I frowned, reluctantly pulling away from him.

He held me tightly for a few seconds, unwilling to let me go, but he finally relented and let me stand up. The leather seemed to protest as well, creaking as we left it. Peter’s hand was still gripping mine as we made our way to the elevator. When we reached the metal doors, I turned to face him.

“I really enjoyed seeing you again,” I smiled, squeezing his fingers fondly.

“Me too,” he agreed. He was quiet for a few seconds before quietly admitting, “I really want to kiss you.”

My heartbeat sped up and my tongue darted out to lick my lips, almost subconsciously. I could practically feel his eyes following the movement. “I’d like that.”

He reached for me with his other hand, but aborted the gesture halfway, hesitant again. “I… uh… could you close your eyes?”

With no hesitation, I let my eyelids fall shut. His hand left mine and I pulled my hands back and let them hang a little awkwardly by my sides. The room was so silent that I could hear the quiet shift of fabric as he adjusted his mask. My heart was beating so loudly that I wouldn’t have been shocked if he mentioned it.

Peter’s arms resumed their usual place around my waist and my body pressed against his, like two puzzle pieces perfectly lined up. My arms stayed between us, resting against his chest, though I did give into temptation slightly and reached up to tentatively stroke my fingers along his jawline, feeling the bunched up mask around his ears. He shivered slightly at my touch, but didn’t seem concerned that I’d pull the mask completely off. Now that I was pressed against him once more, I could feel his heartbeat against my fingertips, beating just as fast as mine.

Then finally, finally , he leaned in and sparks flew.

It was the softest, sweetest and shyest kiss I’d ever had and I felt myself melting into him. My hand cupped his jaw before moving around to the back of his neck, longing to tangle my fingers in his hair. He didn’t deepen the kiss, content for us to just slowly and gently get familiar with each other. Our lips moved together as if we’d choreographed each movement to perfection.

It felt right , an undeniable and unquestionable certainty in my very being that he was it for me. This kiss felt like a rope curling into a tight knot, bonding us to each other. Hours could have easily passed and I wouldn’t have noticed, too wrapped up in the touch, the smell, the taste of Peter.

The trust he was putting in me made me feel beyond special. He trusted me with his name and now he was trusting me enough to let himself be vulnerable in my presence. I wanted to be a safe place for him, wanted to be someone he could share everything with - his hopes, his fears, his random thoughts that popped into his head at the weirdest times. I wanted to meet the important people in his life, like his friends or his aunt.

Peter pulled away slightly, pressing one last kiss against my lips. He seemed to be as breathless as I was; our chests heaved in tandem as we regained our breath. He stroked a fingertip along my spine, laughing quietly when I shuddered and arched further into him.

“So uhh…” I tried. “We’re absolutely doing that again.”

“I am very okay with that.” He was still close enough that I could feel his lips pull up into a smile. “Still have to leave?”

“That was one hell of an argument, but… yeah,” I sighed.

“Alright,” he relented. “Text me when you get home? And drive safe.”

“Of course,” I promised.

One final kiss and a tight hug and then I stepped into the elevator doors, counting down the seconds until I could see him again.

Chapter Text

It had never really occurred to me before this whole thing happened just how many people in the world had the name Peter. Now it seemed like half the people who I encountered were named Peter. So many Peter’s wanted coffee and they were interviewing Peter’s left, right and centre on TV and on the radio. I was constantly turning my head when I heard the name, wondering if this Peter was my Peter.

The cute fluffy haired guy had come in a few more times. Somehow he always managed to come in at a time when I was busy with another task, so someone else had to serve him. This was annoying, but also somewhat welcomed by me. I knew he wasn’t my soulmate - he always left with ‘Ben’ written on his coffee cups - but a tiny part of me had hoped he was.

I couldn’t even explain why… Why did I want this person - a person I’d never even spoken to - to be him, to be Peter?

Every time I tried to imagine Peter’s face, I’d see only a blurry image, a shadowy figure with no discernible features whatsoever. But then the image would distort, changing to soft brown locks and heartstopping brown eyes, complete with a horrible pun shirt and Peter’s words on his skin. Who was this guy?! Why couldn’t I get him out of my head?

He’d even popped into my head when I was actually with Peter. Two weeks had passed since our first official date and I’d seen him three times, twice for what we were calling our date nights and once when we just really wanted to see each other. It was easy with him. Our conversations were effortless, flowing naturally from one topic to another. Even our silences were comfortable.

For the last two times I’d seen him, he had stopped wearing the suit, keeping only the mask on. It was an interesting look, but if he was comfortable then I really didn’t care. Now that he was mostly suit-free, I was able to touch him, skin to skin. There had been the occasional pleasant tingling sensation every now and then when we touched, but nothing like that first time. That didn’t stop my heart from stuttering every time we touched though. Whenever he casually reached out and laced our fingers together or curled his arm over my shoulders, I wanted to pinch myself, just to make sure that I wasn’t dreaming.

Every time I’d see him, the desire to see his face grew stronger and stronger. I wanted to see him smile at me, to see if I could see his feelings for me shining through his eyes. But I worried that part of that desire stemmed from wanting to separate Peter from Ben. They were of a similar height and build, though I’d never spent as much time up close with Ben as I had with Peter, so that could have something to do with my continued comparisons. But once again, I’d never even spoken to Ben!

I groaned and buried my face in my hands, frustrated by my confusing and completely illogical feelings. It was my first full day off in about a week and spending it agonising over feelings I couldn’t even explain was not how I wanted to use that time.

Emily was up and moving around in the kitchen. She was always considerate and tried to be as quiet as possible, but the sounds were still audible through the thin walls of the apartment. A glance at my phone told me it was 10:30am. I groaned quietly again and pushed myself up out of bed. The night before had been an unusually late shift and my brain hadn’t fully recovered yet.

Emily didn’t look up from the tray half loaded with tiny balls of cookie dough that she was bent over when I pushed open my door shuffled out into the kitchen/dining room/living room.

“Morning sleepy head,” she greeted. “I didn’t wake you up with all of this intense cookie action, did I?”

“Nah, I’ve been up for a little while. I just didn’t feel like getting up,” I shrugged. “Also ‘intense cookie action’?”

She gestured to the dirty bowls and spoons in the sink behind her. “You see this setup? This is some serious cookie-ing right here.”

“Is there some sort of special occasion that required baked goods? Or is today just a cookie day?” I asked, moving closer to lean against the counter.

“We have to stop saying cookie, oh my god,” she laughed, finishing up the tray. “It’s losing all meaning.”

I pretended to think it over, tapping a finger against my chin. “Only if I get to have the leftover dough.”

She eyed me carefully. “You can have some.”

“I accept.”

She reached over and very seriously shook my hand, sealing our totally official agreement. We could only hold our straight faces for a few seconds before we broke into laughter. Her phone’s alarm went off, so she grabbed an oven mitt and pulled open the oven, leaning backwards as a wave of heat filled the kitchen.

“First batch done!” Emily beamed, placing the scalding hot tray carefully on the cutting board. She picked up the unbaked batch and slid them in.

“This is some impressive work, Em!” I grinned. “I can’t wait til they cool down so I can try one!”

“Well, while we wait…” She reached into the sink and pulled out the bowl and spoons she’d used earlier, putting the bowl between us and handing me a spoon. “We’d batter get into this.”

I rolled my eyes. “That was utterly terrible. You’re as bad as Peter.”

She smirked, leaning forward and resting her chin on her palm. “Ooh, who’s Peter?”

“I… uhhh…” My face immediately flushed scarlet.

“Is this Peter the reason you’ve been so different lately?” she asked, fluttering her eyelashes at me curiously.

I tilted my head slightly to the side. “Different?”

“Yeah,” she nodded. “You’ve been going out more than usual. You’ve been way more attached to your phone, getting these little smiles and starry-eyed expressions on your face. Oh, and you’ve been wearing more jewellery than usual… particularly bracelets.”

“... my god, you’re observant,” I muttered. “How long have you noticed all that?”

She thought about it for a second, glancing off into the distance before looking back at me. “Like two… two and a half weeks? Something like that. Stop changing the subject!”

I put off talking for a few seconds by licking some batter off the spoon, taking my time while swallowing it. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“C’mon… please?” she whined. “I’ve been quiet for ages because I didn’t want to be nosy. You have no idea how hard it’s been! You know I live for gossip!”

“I admire your restraint,” I replied, sarcasm practically dripping from my words.

She put a hand over her heart. “Thank you. It was a constant effort.”

I stared at her, blankly. “Yeah, that was sarcasm.”

“I’m taking it as genuine,” she grinned. “Okay… can I ask you one thing?”

“Seriously, one thing?” I said. “Can you handle asking only one question?”

“Oh no, I’ll be asking way more than just one. This is just to start us off,” she giggled, waving her hand dismissively.

“Oh, I can’t wait,” I sighed. I wasn’t actually annoyed with her; she knew how much I loved her.

“So you’ve been wearing a lot more bracelets lately, you’ve been leaving the house for reasons other than work, and you’re now mentioning a Peter,” she said, raising a finger for each thing she mentioned. “I don’t think I’m wrong, but I’m sorry if I am, but… is this Peter guy your soulmate?”

I looked down at my wrist, carefully covered with the sleeve of my hoodie as well as a thick leather bracelet. Peter and I hadn’t talked about keeping the whole soulmate thing a secret, but it did feel odd. This would be the first person I’d be actually telling. Tony was obviously the first person who’d found out but I assumed Peter had told him. Or he was just all-knowing. They were both equally plausible possibilities.

Finally, knowing I’d delayed enough, I unclipped the leather bracelet and pushed my sleeve back, revealing my faded soulwords.

Her eyes widened, her entire face lighting up. “Oh my god, honey that’s so exciting! I’m so happy for you!”

I couldn’t help but smile back. “Thank you. Fuck, I know it’s cliche to say, but I really didn’t see it coming. To be honest, I didn’t even realise I’d met my soulmate until I was back here.”

“You… didn’t notice?!” She looked positively dumbfounded. “How could you not notice?”

“Well it doesn’t help when you have the most generic soulwords of all time,” I explained. “He bumped into me, he apologised, I said it was okay, we went our separate ways.”

It sounded very lacklustre and boring when I described it like that. The whole Spider-Man in the middle of dealing with a crime made the whole encounter sound a whole lot more interesting.

“That’s so bizarre. I’ve never heard about anything like that happening before!” She wiped off a small chunk of batter with her finger and popped it in her mouth. “I’m assuming you found him again though, yeah?”

“It was about a week later,” I nodded. “I recognised him and we sat down and chatted about it.”

“Okay, so what’s he like? Tell me everything,” she said eagerly.

Uh oh… this was dangerous territory. I couldn’t exactly tell her what he looked like, I didn’t even know that!

“Well… he’s a massive nerd. He makes terrible puns and is a total Star Wars fanboy,” I explained, a soft smile growing on my face. “I know he lives with his aunt and she means the absolute world to him. He’s seriously smart, like genius level. He’s also the sweetest guy I’ve ever met. He’s always holding my hand or putting his arm around my shoulders. He’s just… amazing.”

“Awwww,” she cooed. “That is the cutest thing ever! When can I meet him?”

“We’re umm… kind of taking things slowly for now,” I told her, going with literally the first excuse I thought of. “You know, seeing how things go. I don’t want to scare him off too quickly.”

“Hey,” she protested, pushing her lips out in an offended pout. “I wouldn’t scare him off!”

I raised an eyebrow at her.

“In my defence, it’s in my job requirements as a best friend that I have to tell any and all of your romantic partners that I’ll kill them if they hurt you,” she said innocently. “Sorry, but it’s in my contract.”

“There isn’t an actual contract is there?” I asked.

“Maybe there is, maybe there isn’t,” she winked. She opened her mouth to probably ask another question, but another alarm on her phone went off, distracting her. “Oh crap, I’d better get ready for work. We are continuing this conversation later.”

“Yaaaay,” I cheered blandly. “I can’t wait.”

She ruffled my hair as she walked past me. “You know you love me.”

“I’m forced to,” I retorted. “It’s in my contract.”

“Ha ha,” she called back, sounding like she was halfway in her closet. “Hey, can you check on those cookies in like ten minutes, please?”

“Can do!”

My phone chirped and I glanced down to see a new notification had popped up.

Peter: Hey, sweetheart! 😘 I was wondering if you wanted to come hang out this afternoon. I’ve got some free time and I’d really like to see you ☺️

Me: I’d love to! What time do you want me to come over? 😊

Peter: 2?

Me: Sounds good! I’ll see you then! ❤️

I paused, staring down at the unsent text. That heart had not been planned but had just flowed naturally when I finished typing out the sentence. I stared at the emoji, biting my lip anxiously, before hitting send and resisting the urge to throw my phone across the room. The notification alert went off a few seconds later and I hesitantly looked at the message.

Peter: Awesome, can’t wait! 😘 ❤️

“Ahh, the smile’s back!” Emily announced, now fully dressed in her work uniform. “How’s Peter doing?”

My blush was back in full force after his text. “He’s fine, thank you. I’m going to go see him in a couple hours.”

“You just want to avoid my questions,” she playfully accused, winking at me.

“Nooooo,” I said, trying to sound as sincere as possible. “Why on earth would I want to do that?”

She pointed two fingers first at her eyes and then at me. “I’m watching you.”

I pushed at her shoulder, directing her towards the front door. “Go to work, you weirdo.”

“Have fun with Peter!” she sang, winking at me before pulling the front door shut.

* * * * * * * *

“Sweetie pie!”

The elevator doors had opened to reveal Peter sprawled out on the couch. He looked way too comfortable, clothed in a plain black T-shirt and dark blue jeans with the ever-present mask covering his face.

“...Cupcake!” I called back, confused.

He pushed himself up and then flipped over the back of the couch, a move that was annoyingly effortless for him. He walked over to me - more of a power walk than a casual gait - and wrapped me in his signature hug, tight but not tight enough to restrict my ability to breathe. His hugs made me feel like I was the most important person to him, at least in that moment. He wouldn’t want to pull away, letting it last longer than the usual ‘socially accepted’ hug, but it never felt awkward in the slightest because I never wanted to pull away either.

“Have we reached the sickeningly cute pet name stage of our relationship?” I asked, my voice slightly muffled from my face being pressed against the side of his neck.

“I think so,” he chuckled. “Don’t know if I’m a ‘cupcake’ though.”

“Am I really a ‘sweetie pie’?” I retorted, pulling back slightly to smirk at him.

“Gumdrop? Honeybuns? Angel? Princess? Baby girl?” he suggested jokingly. God, I hoped he was joking.

I wrinkled my nose at the… eclectic range of names he’d come up with. “Or you know, you could always use my name?”

“Where’s the fun in that?”

Gasping exaggeratedly, I asked, “Wait… you forgot my name, didn’t you?”

“Of course not… uh…” He paused, scratching his finger against his temple as he pretended to think.

“You did! I can’t believe you,” I cried dramatically, wiping away imaginary tears.

“No, no! It’s on the tip of my tongue,” he swore.

I couldn’t hold the laughter back any more and I leaned in to kiss his cheek. The fabric was smooth and soft against my lips. He always wore the mask from his old suit for our dates since he could wear just the mask and not the entire suit like he’d have to with the Iron Spider suit.

“You’re a dork,” I smiled.

Peter cupped my cheek and his voice was adorably affectionate. “I’m your dork.”

I hid my face in his neck again, a massive blush and smile on my face. He let out a long ‘awwww’ and hugged me tightly again. If I had to guess how much of our time together we spent hugging, it would probably be close to 50%... or 60%. If cuddling counted as hugging, then… yeah, most of our time together.

“So what’s the plan for today?” I asked.

“Hanging out, maybe watch some movies, order some food. The usual,” he replied, tracing patterns on my lower back under my shirt.

“Oh wait, I totally forgot!” I dropped my arms and he let me go so I could reach into my handbag and pull out a plastic bag. “Emily made cookies, so I brought some for you to try!”

He excitedly grabbed the bag and held it up to inspect the cookies. “Oh hell yes! This is awesome!”

I cleared my throat, only slightly nervous. “Actually, speaking of Emily, I uhh… told her about you today.”

Peter looked away from the bag. “Oh yeah? What’d you tell her?”

He didn’t sound suspicious at all, so a lot of my nerves dissipated. “Just your name and all of your worst qualities. Standard girl talk.”

“Should I be worried? Am I going to be jumped by a protective BFF ready to defend your honour?” he laughed.

I held up my hand, two fingers almost pinched together but not quite touching. “Just a tiny bit. She’s a little fond of me. She mentioned wanting to meet you, but I told her we’re moving slowly.”

“Well… it wasn’t a lie,” he nodded. He was quickly distracted by the bag of cookies again. “Damn this mask… I want a cookie.”

“I guess you’ll just have to wait, won’t you?” I teased, tapping him lightly on the nose.

“I don’t want to wait!” he whined, staring what I guessed was longingly at the bag. “Hmm… so far I’ve only been moving up the mask to kiss you. Maybe I can kill two birds with one stone…”

My eyes automatically slid closed and he pushed his mask up. It had only been a couple of days since I’d seen him last, but it felt like an eternity since I’d felt his lips on mine. We were growing more familiar with each other with every kiss. My hands took their usual place around his neck, my fingers stroking through the few hairs that had escaped the mask. He let out a tiny groan and pressed harder against me, parting his lips to deepen the kiss. I followed his lead with equal enthusiasm.

Our tongues met, moving together like a choreographed dance, one I knew I would never get tired of. The noises he made were intoxicating and I swallowed them all greedily, replying with quiet but needy noises of my own. Several minutes passed and finally our movements slowed, morphing from passionate to sweet and… loving.

We pulled apart and rested our foreheads together, taking our time to catch our breath. I was very sure that if breathing wasn’t a factor, I could spend hours kissing Peter.

The silence was broken by the sound of crinkling plastic and a quiet chomp.

I leaned back, my eyes still closed. “Are you… you’re eating a cookie, aren’t you?”

“...Maybe.”

“The two things that can unmask Spider-Man: kisses and cookies,” I said, shaking my head.

“Kisses from a very specific person,” he corrected, mouth full. “Fuck, this is a good cookie.”

I giggled. “I’ll give Emily your review.”

* * * * * * * *

Our date had been going wonderfully, a relaxing and chill afternoon in front of the TV. But supervillainy doesn’t stop just because of a date. Friday’s voice rang out through the penthouse, her tone calm but urgent.

“Doom-Bots spotted. Several approaching New York at a rapid pace.”

“Oh crap!” Peter groaned.

He leapt off the couch, darting over to a table with his backpack on it. He yanked the zip open and pulled out… his old suit?

“Wait… is that your old suit?” I asked, resting my elbows against the back of the couch and looking at him, confused. “You’re not wearing your Iron Spider suit?”

He was hurriedly removing his clothes, going down to his boxers, and I blushed a deep red and averted my eyes… after a couple seconds. “Yeah,” he said. “Tony and I are doing some repairs and general upgrades to it, so I’m just using this one for now.”

It had been at least a week since I’d seen him fully suited up. This suit was less shiny than the one I usually saw him in. It also lacked the gold outlining, but the other colours and patterns were pretty much the same. He still looked completely badass and the whole skin-tight thing… yeah, he looked good.

“You’ll still be safe though, right?” I gulped, doing my best to keep my nervousness as hidden as possible.

“Oh totally! I’m Spider-Man, remember? I’ve got this,” Peter said. “Plus this is just some of Dr Doom’s lackeys. It’ll be a piece of cake.”

I paled slightly. “Dr Doom ? Forgive me if that doesn’t exactly make me feel better.”

“It’ll be fine, don’t worry about it!” He walked back to me, putting his hand over mine. His footsteps were all but silent. “Oh, I do have a request, though. It may not be safe for you to go home, so could you stay in the penthouse, please? You can go home after I get back if you want, but I’d feel a lot more comfortable if you were out of the way of danger.”

“Yeah of course,” I smiled weakly. “Just… I know I sound like I’m nagging, but… please be careful. For me?”

“I will,” he replied, voice softer than before. “I promise.”

“Kid, c’mon!”

We turned our heads to see Tony hovering outside, fully decked out in his Iron Man armour. Peter looked back at me and cupped my face with his gloved hand.

“I’m not sure how long we’ll be, but hopefully it won’t be too long,” he told me. “See you soon, sweetheart.”

“I’ll be here.”

I squeezed his hand once and then he was gone, running out to the balcony and leaping off without a second thought. Iron Man flew off. Their brilliantly red suits stood out very clearly against the light blue sky. Whether I’d be able to see any action outside the Tower didn’t matter to me; I didn’t want to see it. The idea of seeing Spider-Man in battle - showing his athleticism, his abilities, his fighting skills - sounded great in theory, but really just filled me with anxiety. The thought of him getting hurt in front of my very eyes and being unable to do anything about it was horrible.

* * * * * * * *

About an hour and a half passed. It was probably the longest hour and a half I’d ever experienced in my life; time felt like it was moving in slow motion. The TV was on the entire time, playing the movie we’d been watching and when that one ended, it changed to the sequel immediately. I had heard that they were good movies, based on Peter’s opinion anyway, but they just couldn’t hold my attention. My thoughts just kept returning to the fight happening in the city outside.

I was curled up in a fancy, expensive penthouse, completely safe, while Peter was outside fighting to protect me and every other person in the city. I had no idea if he was okay or if he was hurt. Well… wait… Friday. Maybe Friday knew what was happening in the fight.

“Umm… Friday?” I said tentatively.

She - it? - replied immediately. “Yes, miss.”

“Do you know how the fight is going? Are Peter and Tony okay?” I asked. I grabbed a nearby pillow and pulled it on my lap, clutching it with both hands.

“Both men are doing well. War Machine joined the fight shortly after it began,” she explained. “They have destroyed the majority of the Doom-Bots and are currently working on destroying the final few.”

A weight lifted off my shoulders and breathing suddenly felt a lot easier. “That’s really good to hear! Thank you, Friday.”

How the AI managed to speak in a warm tone was a mystery, but it was definitely comforting. “Of course, miss. I imagine the fight won’t last much lo-”

“F-Friday?”

“Injury sustained,” she reported. “Seeking medical attention would be advisable. Contacting doctor on call.”

It didn’t seem like she was talking to me. Maybe Tony? “Who, Friday? Who was injured?”

“Spider-Man.”

The sudden sharp pain in my chest actually made me gasp and I hugged the pillow tightly against my chest as if it could ease the pain. This was a different kind of worry. This was a deep, soul-crushing feeling that was all-encompassing, impossible to ignore. The thought of losing him - this guy, this wonderful, dorky adorable guy who I’d only known for a few weeks - was gut-wrenching. Air was suddenly impossible to find, but even that didn’t matter because suddenly I didn’t know how to breathe at all.

Vaguely, I heard a voice calling me. “-ss. Miss! The fight is over, Miss! They are on their way to the Tower now.”

I raised my head, letting myself look outside for the first time since Peter had left. The sky was definitely more yellow than it was earlier.

“Peter will feel worse if he sees you in this state, miss,” Friday said. “Take deep breaths. Focus on the pillow and the couch to ground yourself. Listen to the sound of my voice.”

For a computer program, she was surprisingly good at bringing someone down from a panic attack. She spoke quietly and soothingly about random things, avoiding mentioning the fight or Peter’s injury at all. Though I never forgot about it, I did find myself breathing again, slow and deep breaths. My lungs were grateful for that.

“Thank you, Friday,” I said, once I was able to speak again.

“You’re welcome, miss,” she replied, sounding completely genuine. “Sir and Peter are almost home.”

“Right… okay,” I nodded. “Is the doctor here yet?”

“Yes,” the AI answered. “He is getting the med room ready for their arrival.”

A quiet roar caught my attention. Well not quite a roar,  more like… Ahh, there it was. Iron Man was now in view, quickly approaching the Tower. In his arms was Peter, who had his arms wrapped around his middle.

My heart clenched again, but I took another deep breath and kept a straight face. In an attempt to be remotely useful, I moved over to the wall of windows and pulled open the balcony door to let them in. Iron Man landed on the balcony with a metallic thud, not even bothering with the landing pad, and came inside. He didn’t stop, continuing towards the elevator. I followed along.

“What did I tell you?” Iron Man said. His voice sounded odd coming through the suit, more robotic than usual. “Much faster than you trying to swing home with that injury of yours.”

“You’re seriously pulling an ‘I told you so’?” Peter groaned. “You can put me down now.”

Tony was not a fan of that idea. “Uh yeah, I don’t think so. You’re injured, so I’m carrying you down to medical.”

“Toooony, c’mon! I’m fine!”

He was probably trying to sound convincing, but it wasn’t really working. Despite the red of his suit, I could still see blood seeping through his fingers. I hurried to the elevator and pushed the button, willing it to arrive as quickly as possible. The doors slid open silently and I breathed a sigh of relief. Tony carried Peter into the elevator and I slipped in after them.

“You want to walk, Pete?” The helmet of Tony’s suit retracted, disappearing down into the rest of the suit, and he eyed Peter doubtfully.

“Yeah!” Peter said, pushing at Tony’s arm and not really accomplishing anything.

“Alright…”

Tony carefully let Peter down, making sure not to drop him or make any abrupt movements. He kept his arm around his protégée, waiting until Peter was steady and then let him stand on his own. Peter stood steadily for a few seconds before his legs started shaking. I reacted first, wrapping my arm around his waist, avoiding the left side of his abdomen where Peter had a tight grip on.

“Hi baby doll,” he sighed, resting his head on top of mine. “I’m sorry I broke my promise.”

“It’s okay,” I mumbled, tears pricking at my eyes. “You can make it up to me by recovering from this.”

He curled his free arm around my shoulders for support and I gripped his hand. I smiled for the first time in close to two hours. He worried about seeming weak with Tony, but accepted assistance from me without fighting, at least right now. Tony had a tiny smile on his face as well and he winked at me.

The doctor, a tall dark-haired man with prominent laugh lines on his face, was waiting for us when we walked into the medical room. He shook his head when he caught sight of Peter.

“What did you do this time, Spider-boy?” His voice was deep and rumbling. He looked at Peter with an exasperated fondness. There was definitely a level of familiarity there, so I assumed he was the one who usually took care of Peter.

“Nothing!” Peter protested, resting some of his weight on me.

The doctor smirked. “Uh huh, it’s always nothing, isn't it?”

Tony reached over and put a gentle hand on Peter’s shoulder. “Kiddo here got a little too cocky when he was up against a Doom-Bot.”

“Is that so? Well, come over here Peter so I can have a look at the damage,” he said, patting the paper-covered examination bed. I helped the injured hero up onto the bed, cringing as he groaned in pain. “We have a helper today, do we? Who might you be?”

I gave him my name and reached over to shake his hand. From behind us, Tony chuckled. “She’s his girlfriend,” he teased, drawing out the word.

“Well, it’s very nice to meet you. I’m Dr Jacobs,” he said, smiling warmly. “Maybe you can join us in trying to keep Peter out of this room.”

I laughed. It was an odd sound since my anxiety was still running fairly high. “It’s become my mission in life.”

“I like her,” Dr Jacobs grinned. He turned his attention back to the patient. “Alright, Petey. Suit off. Let’s see what’s going on here.”

Peter pressed the spider emblem on the suit of his chest and the entire suit expanded. He pushed the baggy fabric off his shoulders, letting it pool around his lap. It clung to his wound for a terrifying second, but finally pulled away and revealed his injury. Dr Jacobs pushed him lightly on the shoulder and helped him slowly lie down, grabbing a pillow to put under Peter’s head.

Yeah… it didn’t look good. The left side of his abdomen was cut open, a long and straight line, but rather deep. Blood was seeping from the wound at a somewhat alarming rate, colouring his pale skin surrounding the cut a horrifying shade of red. To make the whole thing even worse, around the cut was a dark and very painful looking burn. Tony swore and I felt my stomach lurch.

The doctor sucked in a breath. “Well… this is certainly a doozy, Pete.” My boyfriend lifted his head, trying to see the extent of the injury, but Dr Jacobs just pushed his head back down. “Ah ah, nope. None of that. Okay, first things first. Tony, can you grab me some of Peter’s anaesthetic, please?”

“Sure thing, doc,” Tony nodded.

The two men worked quickly and efficiently together. While they worked on stitching up Peter’s injury, Peter explained what had happened. The Doom-Bot he’d been fighting had moved slightly faster than he had expected. He also said it might have been possible that he’d been slightly distracted by mid-fight banter. Whatever the case, the bot had snapped its arm forward and sliced straight through Peter’s suit, sending through a bolt of electricity immediately afterwards which caused that horrid burn.

After that, Tony explained to me how they’d spent a long time examining and analysing Peter’s DNA to create an anaesthetic and pain killer that would be effective for more than two minutes at a time, thanks to his insane metabolism. It had taken months of researching and testing, but finally, they’d found a formula that achieved their intended results.

Seeing its work was remarkable; Peter’s body had been tensed up with pain, but now he seemed more relaxed and peaceful. I’d pulled up a chair just beside his head, on the right side of the table so I’d be out of the way. My fingers stroked along his cheek and jawline, hoping to distract him from the tugging feeling as the doctor finished up the last of the stitches.

“Based on what we know of Peter’s healing ability, shouldn’t this have started to heal up by now?” Dr Jacobs frowned, an expression that looked out of place on his face. “Even by the slightest bit?”

Tony leaned over the table, eyebrows furrowing. “...You’re right. This burn should have started easing up.”

“Could something have been on whatever caused this to impede his healing?” the doctor asked.

“It’s definitely possible,” Tony sighed. “Alright, let’s swab the area. See if we can find something that shouldn’t be there.”

The two men thoroughly inspected the wound, taking samples from as many places as they could, and then gave Peter a shot of Spider-Man grade pain killers. They then headed for the med lab for testing. I, of course, stayed with Peter.

“How are you feeling, Peter?” I asked, dragging my chair further down the bed so we could see each other better.

“I’m feeling better than I did before,” he admitted. “Don’t feel any of the pain and since the anaesthetic is wearing off, I’m feeling less spacey as well. I’m sorry I worried you though.”

I smiled despite the exhaustion I was feeling. “It’s okay. I know you didn’t go out intending to get hurt.”

“Well… no, but still,” he said sheepishly. “I want to make it up to you… and I think I know how to do it.”

He reached a steady hand up to his face and I put the pieces together.

“Peter, wait,” I said, putting my hand on his to halt his movement. “Are you sure about this? I mean… you don’t have to reveal your identity just to make me feel better. And you’re all drugged up as well. I don’t know if this is the kind of decision you should make if you’re not clear headed.”

He chuckled quietly, rubbing the back of my hand soothingly with his thumb. “Honestly I was thinking about doing this anyway. I think this was the push I needed to finally do it. And yeah, I am hopped up on painkillers, but I promise I’m thinking straight.”

“I… um… okay.” I pulled my hand back and rested it in my lap, anticipation rising up inside me.

“Okay… here goes.”

Time felt like it had slowed down again as I watched him grab the bottom of his mask and pull it gradually upwards. His chin appeared, then his jaw and mouth - the lips I’d grown so fond of. Then his cheeks and nose were uncovered. My heart was beating incredibly loudly, a pulsing thud that I could feel pounding through my entire body. With one final tug, he pulled it all the way off. Warm chocolate brown eyes… short, fluffy brown hair…

That was the face of… no, wait… how could it be...

...Ben?

“Y-you… I… wait… what?” I stammered.

He smiled nervously, one of the most adorable things I’d ever seen in my life. “Umm… surprise?”

I groaned and leaned forward, resting my head against the table to hide my face. “I’m an idiot… You were coming in the entire time and I didn’t even connect the dots.”

“Hey, hey no! You’re not an idiot,” Peter said hurriedly. He tried to push himself up, but quickly stopped and let out a quiet moan of pain. My head jerked up and I looked at him worriedly. He waved his hand, silently reassuring me that he was fine. “I just… god, it sounds creepy when I think about saying it out loud, but I just… wanted to see you. It hit me when I saw you there and you spoke to me that… you’d recognise my voice straight away, so I stayed silent.”

“And… what about going by Ben?” I asked quietly, gripping the edges of the paper and tearing it. The ripping sound was extra loud in the still room.

His lips pulled down into a sad frown. “Ahh right. That one has pretty much the same reason as me staying silent. Once you knew my name, oh my name is actually Peter, by the way, just in case you weren't sure. Anyway, once you knew my name, a guy named Peter who happened to be my exact height who kept showing up to the coffee shop would seem pretty suspicious, wouldn’t it?”

I nodded slowly, letting the information sink in. “Okay. Well, if we’re being honest, I felt a… sort of connection to Ben that I couldn’t really explain. I felt fucking awful about it, thinking I was betraying you.”

Peter’s face paled and he looked horrified. “I… oh fuck. I-I’m so sorry! I never… I mean… Fuck that’s not what I wanted at all. I just wanted to see you…”

“Well it’s sweet now that I know it was you,” I said. “Maybe try saying hi next time you come in. My coworkers think you have a massive crush on me and are too nervous or intimidated to say anything.”

He laughed. “They’re half right! Maybe next time I come in, I could ask you out on an actual date.”

I smiled back. “Maybe I’ll say yes.”

“Dinner and a movie?” he asked.

“Flowers?” I giggled.

“Aww, you’d bring me flowers?” he cooed, fluttering his eyelashes at me.

He burst into laughter when I pushed at his shoulder, rolling my eyes at him. “You’re a dork,” I muttered.

“I’m your dork,” he beamed.

My heart skipped a beat. Watching his eyes light up as genuine joy shone through his expression was honestly breathtaking. I couldn’t handle not kissing him for another second, so I stood up and leaned forward to do just that. My fingers twisted into his curls, holding his lips against mine. He let out a quiet sigh, his breath ghosting over my face. When I pulled back, my heart stopped again. It was there! The look in his eyes I’d been so hoping would be there. Paired with the almost dopey grin on his face that I had no doubt was mirrored on my own, I just knew that he felt the same way I did. Not quite love - with all the circumstances of our meeting and the fact that we’d only known each other for a little more than a month, we weren't quite there yet - but a strong and deep connection and attraction that I couldn’t wait to explore further.

“Yeah,” I whispered, our lips still close enough for them to brush together as I spoke. “You’re my dork.”

Chapter Text

There was a knock on the door.

“He’s here!” Emily cheered, jumping up from the couch excitedly. Her heels - worn entirely to make her look taller - clacked loudly on the floor.

I rested my arm on the couch and propped my head up on my open palm. “How is it possible that you’re more excited about this than I am?”

She waved a hand at me. “Shhh! Okay okay, game faces on!”

I rolled my eyes as she took a few deep breaths and schooled her expression into one of both condescension and boredom. Even her hair looked stricter than normal, pulled back into a severe bun. Thankfully, from my seat on the couch, I had a perfect view of the front door and… whatever the hell this interaction was about to be. Once her facade was completely in place, she pulled open the door.

“Ahh… so you must be the boyfriend then. Paul, was it?”

“Oh dear god,” I muttered.

Peter, wonderful and amazing Peter, had this adorably awkward smile on his face. He’d forgone a nerdy T-shirt, instead wearing a light blue button-down shirt with none of the buttons done up, a plain white shirt underneath and dark wash jeans. It also looked like he’d tried to comb his hair to flatten it down, which seemed to have limited success. On the ground next to him was a brown basket, covered by a lid so I couldn’t even peek inside, and in his hand was a gorgeous bouquet of roses. Not just the usual red either, but whites, pinks, and yellows as well. He caught sight of me on the couch and I offered him a wave and a mouthed “Sorry”.

He smiled, but turned his attention back to the unusually intimidating Emily blocking his path. “Umm, it’s Peter actually. And you must be Emily, the… friend and roommate?”

“That’s right, Patrick,” she nodded. She stretched her arm out and propped it on the doorframe, further obscuring his view of me. “And as the best friend, it’s my job to figure out if you’re good enough for her or not.”

“She realises we’ve been together for like a month and a half now, right?” Peter said, going up on tiptoes to glance over at me, a confused look on his face.

“Oh yeah, she knows,” I sighed, stretching out on the couch to get comfortable.

Emily pulled his attention back to her with an annoyed wave of her hand. “No no no, this conversation is between me and you.”

“Ahh, of course. Sorry.” I had to applaud his patience. It was honestly impressive.

“Let’s just cut to the chase, shall we?” Emily said, raising one perfectly manicured eyebrow. “What are your intentions with my best friend?”

I groaned. “Em, seriously?” She flipped me off behind her back and I buried my face in my hands.

“Well, Pierre?”

“She… she means the world to me. She changed my life the day I met her and now I can’t imagine my life without her in it.” His cheeks flushed as he spoke, but he kept going. “She makes me happy and I’m pretty sure I make her happy too. I just… I just want her to be happy. That’s really all I want.”

Em stared at him appraisingly for a few seconds, then broke out into a massive grin, stepping back into the apartment. “Well alright then! Now that that’s all sorted, you two better get going for your date.”

He blinked. “Wait… that’s it? I’ve got the tick of approval?”

“Yep!”

“You’re a dick, Em,” I chuckled.

“Hey, I’m awesome and you know it,” she corrected. “And I’ve always wanted to do the interrogation thing!”

“Well, I’m glad you had fun.” I pushed myself up off the couch, throwing my handbag over my shoulder and adjusting my shorts and tank top, a tiny bit wrinkled from the couch. “But we really do have to get going now.”

“Yes, go! Get going and have a great time,” she laughed, practically shooing me out of the apartment and into Peter’s waiting arms. She pointed a finger at him. “I expect her to be home at a reasonable time though, Peter.”

I leaned up and kissed him lightly on the cheek. His face softened immediately, looking at me with such a loving expression that my heart could barely take it. He handed the bouquet of roses to me, the clear plastic wrapped around the flowers crinkling quietly, and I admired them for a few seconds before handing them off to Emily.

“Could you put these in some water for me, please honey?” I asked, smiling sweetly at her.

She rolled her eyes but took the flowers. “Of course, dear. Now go already!”

* * * * * * * *

It was starting to get colder. Not like unbearably cold or true winter temperatures, but definitely colder. Luckily for us, the weather had warmed back up for our first in public date. Peter had been very quiet about the whole thing, only telling me that he’d changed his mind about the dinner and movie we’d discussed.

He couldn’t continue his secrecy for as long as he probably would have liked, since the train we got on announced popular destinations near our stop and Peter pouted adorably. For his sake, I pretended to still be oblivious and put a huge smile on my face when we arrived outside Central Park.

He glanced over at me and sighed. “You knew, didn’t you?”

“Well, only when the train announced it, but I’m still excited,” I said. “I’m assuming we’re picnicking?”

He nodded. “Yep! We’re going to set up somewhere super pretty and picnic.”

“You have a spot in mind?” I asked.

“Yeah, I think you’re going to love it.” He reached over to entwine our fingers together and we walked into the park.

* * * * * * * *

It was a beautiful sight to behold. Lush green grass, partially covered by the red and yellow leaves fallen from the trees above. Families with screaming and laughing children ran around the grassy areas while couples strolled along the pathways with their hands clasped and heads on each other's shoulders. It was true though that Peter and I definitely fell into that second category pretty easily. The sun filtered down through the leaves that still clung to the branches, casting scattered shadows on the ground that shifted around as the wind gently blew through them. Peter swung our hands back and forth, smiling brightly as we walked along.

We’d only been walking for a few minutes before Peter declared that we’d arrived. Just off the path was a small field of grass, mostly clear of leaves despite the trees dotted around the area. The slightly hilly field overlooked a stunning and incredibly reflective body of water. A small flock of ducks was clustered together out in the presumably deeper part of the water. There was a small sign poked into the ground, nearby a tree with deep red foliage. In large black letters, the sign read ‘Reserved - Parker’.

“Aww, did you reserve a spot for us?” I smiled. “I didn’t even know you could do that!”

He nodded, looking pleased by my reaction. “Well yeah, I wanted to make sure that we got a space and everything and that it had a really nice view! It would have sucked if we’d come all the way here and there was nowhere to sit.”

“You’re the sweetest,” I said, leaning over to kiss him.

Together, we set up the picnic blanket - blue and white patterned with large chevrons. He set the basket aside and we just sat side by side, leaning back on our hands with our legs stretched out in front of us, and watched people walk by as the water rippled lazily behind them. I let my head fall to the side to rest on his shoulder and he nuzzled his cheek against my hair.

“Oh hey, fun fact,” Peter said after a few minutes of silence. “So the lake we’re staring at right now is called The Lake.”

“That’s… that’s actually terrible,” I laughed.

He laughed with me. “There’s a pond a bit further down as well that’s just called The Pond.”

“Those may be the most imaginative names I’ve ever heard,” I said sarcastically. “Like… they couldn’t come up with anything better? Even some sort of pun would be better.”

“Give me like five minutes and I’m sure I could come up with a few punny names for them.” Even without looking at him, I could practically sense his grin.

“I swear to god, I will leave,” I warned him, jokingly.

“You are no fun,” he sighed. The fond tone of voice and soft pressure of his head resting gently on mine spoke louder than his words though and I couldn’t stop the smile from spreading across my face.

One thing I never expected was just how important sitting with Peter in comfortable silence would become to me. He and Emily were the only two people I spent a prolonged amount of time with outside of work and while Emily was an absolute delight and my best friend, she didn’t really like silences that much. She could put up with them but she much preferred talking or at least some sort of music or TV playing in the background.

With Peter though, our silences were wonderful. I could spend the time just enjoying his company and marveling over how insanely lucky I was to have a guy like him as my boyfriend and, even crazier, to have him as my soulmate. I still needed to pinch myself every so often just to make sure it hadn’t all been some wonderful fairytale dream. He’d become so much happier since he’d pulled off the mask and taken that one step further to being fully open and honest with me. The next step was apparently me meeting Aunt May which I was both excited and terrified about. This woman was probably the most important person in his life (I hoped that I was at least top 5… maybe… hopefully), so making a good impression was kind of a big deal.

A neon green frisbee landed on the grass next to us and it definitely didn’t make me jump. We glanced over to see three teenagers waving at us from across the field. Peter got to his feet, picked up the frisbee and tossed it back at them. His aim was perfect. The tallest of the three boys jumped to catch it while the other two gave Peter a thumbs up and another wave. The three went back to their game, disappearing behind a thick tree.

“You’ve got a good arm,” I said as he came back over to our blanket and sat back down next to me.

“Thanks,” he smiled. “It’s actually kinda hard to make sure I didn’t throw it too far or anything like that. My strength can be scary sometimes.”

“Oh yeah, I suppose I didn’t really think about that. Are you like… always aware of it? Do you have to hold back during fights to make sure you don’t seriously hurt someone?”

He glanced around to make sure no one was within hearing distance before answering. “It’s not always in my head, but it’s definitely something I have to think about. We’ve done a lot of training and testing over the years so I know how much strength I need to use to knock someone out and stuff like that.”

I nodded. “Sooooo…”

“Yeah?”

“How strong are you?” I asked, bumping his shoulder with mine.

He chuckled. “When I was first starting out, there was a truck going way too fast. I landed in front of it and caught it, stopping it completely.”

“Wait… you brought a speeding truck to a complete stop and somehow didn’t kill yourself in the process?” I said, staring at him wide-eyed.

“Yep!” Peter replied. His words were nonchalant, but the tiny smirk on his face showed how proud he was of that fact. “Oh and I fought Captain America and totally kicked his ass.”

“I’m sorry, what?” I squeaked. “When the hell did you fight Captain freaking America?”

“Couple years back. It was my first job with the Avengers… to fight the Avengers,” he shrugged. “Things were kinda complicated then, but I suppose that was Tony’s test for me. To see if I was gonna be a good fit for the team.”

“I’m going to take a wild guess here and say you passed,” I said.

“Well either that or he’s been humouring me for a long time now and I seriously doubt that Tony Stark has that kind of patience,” he grinned. “And with him paying for my MIT tuition… I’d say he’s a little fond of me.”

I kicked off my sandals, pushing them to a corner of the blanket. “How’s that going, by the way?”

“It’s definitely been nice to not have to be on campus all the time. With work, other work, May, Tony and now you, I don’t know if I could have handled being in Massachusetts full time,” he answered, looking a little tired but proud. “I’m just glad Tony and I could work out this plan with them, so I’ll still finish in the regular amount of time and get to spend more time here with the things and people most important to me.”

“And you’re getting enough sleep, right?” I asked. He went to answer straight away but I cut him off with a pointed look. “I know you say you do, but you’re you. They always say that driving while drowsy is dangerous, so I have to imagine that swinging around the city on spiderwebs while drowsy has to be like way worse!”

“I know, love, I know,” he said soothingly. My heart skipped a beat at the casually spoken endearment. “But I promise I’m getting enough sleep. Keeping people safe is kinda my job and I can’t do that if I’m not at 100%.”

“Okay,” I smiled. “I believe you. On a lighter note, wanna get this picnic started?”

“What have we been doing this whole time then?” he chuckled.

“Yeah yeah, okay Mr. Smartass.” I rolled my eyes and reached over to drag the basket closer.

He flipped the lid open and started pulling things out, explaining them as he went. “Okay first off, water bottles. Some sandwiches and some muffins, pretty basic but yeah. And finally, some strawberries! Pepper’s allergic so we can’t have these at the Tower, but Pepper isn’t here. So… strawberries!”

I smiled at him and helped him set everything out across the blanket. “This all looks great, Pete. Thank you so much.”

The last thing he pulled out was a small packet of seeds. “Also, I uhh… I heard bread was actually bad for ducks, but that some kind of seeds were okay? So if we wanna feed some ducks, we have some sunflower seeds!”

I chuckled. “I’m very impressed by your planning, Peter. This is all so lovely!”

He blushed faintly and a tiny, pleased smile appeared on his face. “Aww thanks, love. I’m glad you like it.”

“Of course,” I said brightly. “Let’s get started!”

* * * * * * * *

“They like the seeds!”

Peter’s face had lit up, a wide smile across his face, as he crouched down on edge of the lake. A small group of ducks had gathered in front of him, eagerly eating the seeds that Peter threw for them. I crouched down beside him, glancing back and forth between him and his new animal companions.

“Of course they do,” I giggled. “You put so much thought into picking them out.”

“Speaking of lots of thought, I’ve been coming up with names for them all!” Peter declared.

“Have you now?” I asked, shifting slightly to get more comfortable.

He pointed to the smallest duck of the group. “That’s Quacker Jack.” He moved his finger to a slightly larger duck, with a vividly orange beak. “Firequacker.” The third duck was a dark brown colour with speckled wings. “Quack Sparrow.” He pointed to a darker duck with white markings. “Quackie Chan.” The last duck was a white-ish grey duck with a green beak. “Finally, we have the leader… Bill.”

I stared at him, my mouth open. “I… I have no words…”

“The date was really a side thing in my head. I was mostly thinking about the ducks,” he grinned, throwing out another small handful of seeds.

“I knew it!” I gasped dramatically. “Do you want me to just leave you alone with your new friends? I wouldn’t want to interrupt your quality bonding time.”

Completely seriously, he said, “That’d be awesome.”

I sighed and pushed myself up, hearing my knees crack with the movement. “Fine… I understand. I’m totally taking the basket though.”

With that, I grabbed the basket and started to walk away. Only a few steps later, I heard him throw out the last of the seeds and then hurry after me. His arm wrapped around my shoulders and matched pace with me.

“The ducks and I had a chat,” he told me. “We came to a mutual decision that I should stay with you instead.”

“Wow… I don’t think I’ve ever felt so loved in my life,” I mused, leaning into his embrace.

He laughed. “You should! I gave up my ducks!”

“Oh I’m terribly sorry for your sacrifice,” I said, completely sincerely.

“Well… you know, in time I think I’ll move on.” He sniffled and wiped away a fake tear.

“Of course honey,” I soothed, trying as hard as I could not to roll my eyes at his theatrics. “These are clearly difficult times for you and if there’s anything you need, anything at all, I’ll be there to help you out.”

He kissed my temple, lingering there for a few seconds and smiling against my skin. “Aww, you’re such a sweetheart.”

I let out a quiet sigh, but couldn’t stop the fond smile from spreading across my face. “So… any more plans for the rest of our date?”

“I figured we could walk around some,” he explained. His arm slipped down off my shoulder, but we weren’t separated for more than a few seconds before he took my hand. “You know, enjoy this nice weather while it lasts.”

I nodded. “I think that sounds lo-“

“Ooh! Crunchy leaf!” He took a giant step forward, dragging me along with him, and stepped down hard on the leaf. There was no crunch, just the sound of his shoe slapping against the concrete path. His face dropped. “The betrayal…”

“First you lose your ducks and now you get a non-crunchy leaf?” I shook my head in disbelief. “The world is a cruel bitch.”

He hung his head sadly. “Right? Life is so unfair.”

“Hopefully a nice and relaxing walk around the park will cheer you up,” I said, squeezing his hand gently.

He sighed. I suppose it’s worth a shot.”

“I’m really feeling your optimism here,” I laughed, swinging our arms as we walked, just like he’d done earlier.

Peter, of course being Peter, only managed to maintain his pout for about thirty seconds, which was honestly impressive for him. Despite the number of people in the park, it was honestly surprising how quiet it was. Even the traffic sounded really distant, which I hadn’t thought was even possible. We could lose ourselves in the park, in a peaceful environment, passing by elaborate fountains and beautiful statues. I had to admit, Peter had done a pretty damn good job of choosing a date spot.

We strolled along the pathways, occasionally moving to the side to allow people to pass by. His thumb stroked gently against my skin. It hit me at that moment that we really didn’t have to hide anymore. Well, there was still the whole Spider-Man thing, since obviously I couldn’t just run up and greet him with a kiss when he was all suited up. But with Peter, we could do whatever we wanted. Be a normal couple and do all the cheesy, romantic things that people in love do together.

Wait… what?

I was pulled from my sudden realisation by Peter’s excited gasp. “I totally forgot that was here!”

“Forgot what was here?” I asked.

He pointed to a pavilion just up ahead of us. Through the large openings in the pavilion walls, I could see bright colours, and I could hear cheery polka music. We walked closer and the shapes and colours inside the building became clearer, turning into vibrant horses as well as a few elaborately designed chariots. The carousel seemed to be slowing down, apparently on the last few moments of the current turn.

“Do you wanna go on?” He asked, eyes wide with excitement.

“Peter… we’re adults,” I told him. He wilted for a split second before I continued. “Of course we’re going to ride the carousel.”

He paid the vendor and we moved to stand in line. To call it a line might have been a bit of an overstatement since the only people ahead of us was a family with two young children. The little boy stared down at a phone, but the little girl seemed particularly excited about the ride, staring at the slowly rotating horses longingly. The two men stood close together, speaking quietly to each other. One of the men stroked his hand lovingly through his daughter’s adorably messy blonde curls.

As soon as the previous riders had made their way out of the small pavilion and the vendor had allowed us through, the small girl darted forward, tugging insistently on her father’s hand.

“Papa, hurry!” she whined.

“I’m coming, Zoe,” he laughed. “Mark, you’ve got Eli?”

“Yes, Hayden, I’ve got him,” Mark smiled. “Now hurry up before she rips your arm off.”

We followed the family inside. The dad and the boy sat down in one of the chariots, while Zoe led the other dad to a brilliant white horse. He stood beside it and helped her onto the saddle, making sure she was stable. When Zoe had made her decision, Peter and I made ours. We chose horses that stood side by side, chestnut brown steeds that were forever frozen in the act of rearing up. They were almost identical colour wise, with matching red and yellow bridles. The only difference was the saddle colours. Both were predominantly red, but Peter’s horse had a blue accent on its saddle while mine had a mint green accent. I put the basket on the floor, just to the side of my horse.

Even between rides, the loud cheery music played on. I climbed up on the horse, shifting slightly until I was comfortable. Peter had climbed up on his horse as well and bounced in his seat, eager for the ride to start.

“You look just like that little girl,” I laughed, speaking louder so he’d be able to hear me.

We looked over at Zoe. Her father, a lovingly exasperated smile on his face, had his arms out ready to catch her since she was practically leaping out of her seat with excitement.

“I mean, she is pretty adorable,” Peter smiled.

Finally, after a few more people had climbed onto the ride, the carousel started spinning, slowly increasing speed as it went. The little girl’s peals of laughter could be heard over the music. Our horses moved up and down as the platform rotated, pushing Peter up into the air one second and then me the next. It was more fun than I’d expected; I hadn’t been on a carousel since I was a kid and this one in particular was absolutely gorgeous. Plus, Peter’s grinning face and obvious joy definitely added to my entertainment.

Only a couple minutes later, the carousel slowed down and finally, came to a complete stop. Peter pouted but slid off his horse. He grabbed the basket and took my hand as we walked out of the carousel pavilion. On the way, we passed by Zoe, who clung to her horse, desperate to stay on the ride.

The wind had picked up a little, but it was still more pleasant than annoying. He led me back to the path and we continued our stroll through the park. It was just… peaceful. I couldn’t help the smile that grew on my face and I saw the same smile mirrored on Peter’s face. We found ourselves outside of the Central Park Zoo, found a miraculously empty bench and quickly claimed it. We sat close together and he automatically reached out to wrap his arm around my shoulders.

“So can we come back and do the zoo another day?” I asked. “Because that totally requires a full day.”

“Oh we can absolutely do that,” Peter grinned.

Sighing happily and leaning against his chest, I looked around appreciatively. “You know… this is actually the first time I’ve ever been here.”

He whipped his head around to stare at me, looking utterly shocked. “Seriously?”

“Hey!” I protested. “In my defense, I didn’t grow up here. And since I moved here, I’ve just... never gotten around to coming here.”

He nodded and looked off into the distance, lost in thought. “Ben and May used to take me here all the time. We’d just walk around together and talk. And just before we’d leave, we’d go to the fountain, toss a coin in and make a wish.”

“Wait… Is that why you went by Ben at the coffee shop? Because it was your… uncle’s name?”

He smiled fondly. “Yeah, Ben was… he meant a lot to me. My parents actually named me after him.”

I glanced over at him. “Oh yeah?”

“Uh huh!” he nodded. “Peter Benjamin Parker. So going by Ben just kinda made sense.”

I stood up, pulling him along with me. “How about we keep the tradition alive? Do you have any coins on you?”

His face lit up. “Wait really?”

“Yep! Though I already have you so I don’t know what else to wish for really,” I said, squeezing his hand.

“Well if that isn’t the sweetest thing that’s ever been said to me,” he beamed.

“I try, I try,” I said fondly. “Okay now, was it a specific fountain or any fountain really?”

“The Bethesda Fountain. The one nearby our picnic spot,” he said.

“Alright, let’s get going!” I grinned.

It took about ten minutes to get back to the fountain. Peter set the pace a little bit faster than our previous casual stroll since he was just so excited to get back to the fountain. Peter explained that the Bethesda Terrace and Fountain were a hotspot for tourists and the large crowd of people milling around definitely proved that claim. The red and cream bricked terrace surrounded the huge and absolutely gorgeous fountain and the whole terrace had a fantastic view overlooking the lake. Oh, wait… The Lake.

We dodged around a few people taking pictures of the area and finally reached the fountain’s edge. The tall angel statue stood in the centre, water trickling out from the base of the figure, down onto the two lower platforms, and then into the pool of water at the bottom. The coins scattered throughout the fountain glittered, directing little rays of light up onto the statue as well as the faces of people looking down into the water. We each took out a coin and thought about our wishes.

What to wish for… As corny and cliche as it was, discovering the identity of my soulmate would have been my go-to wish. Now that I’d met my soulmate, I needed a new wish but nothing was immediately coming to mind.

Peter stood beside me, a thoughtful expression on his face. He flipped the coin, spinning it up into the air and watched it land in the water. He looked so carefree, so happy, so peaceful. Despite having only known him for a short period of time, he’d become so important to me. He had this vibrant spark to his personality that made people love him; it was almost impossible not to. He was insanely smart, genuinely kind and compassionate, generous, and selfless. And that wasn’t even including the fact that on top of all of that, he was Spider-Man. He’d taken on so much responsibility at such a young age and was determined to do as much good in the world as he possibly could.

But being a superhero was dangerous. His injury from the Doom-Bot attack two weeks ago was proof enough of that. And I seriously doubted that this was the first time he’d been injured. Seeing Peter injured was… Yeah, definitely not something I wanted to see again.

Just like that… I had my wish. I tossed my coin into the fountain and closed my eyes.

I wish for Peter’s safety and wellbeing .

The coin hit the water with a quiet splash and sunk to the bottom of the pool, landing just next to Peter’s coin. We stayed quiet for a little longer, watching the water rippling across the surface of the fountain.

“So what’d you wish for?” Peter asked.

“Seriously?” I laughed, turning away from the fountain to look at him. “Don’t you know the first rule of wish making?”

He grinned. “Eh, it was worth a shot.”

“Oh please, it wasn’t even a subtle attempt!” I rolled my eyes fondly at him.

His grin faded down to a small, genuine smile. “Thanks for doing this with me today. It… it means a lot.”

“Of course, Pete,” I said, taking his hand and squeezing it gently. “I had a lot of fun today.”

“Me too,” he said. “I guess I should take you home. I don’t really want this to end though…”

I nodded, feeling exactly the same way. “I mean… we still have the whole train ride back to my apartment, so that’s something at least.”

“I suppose you’re right,” he smiled. “Okay, let’s get going.”

The journey home passed by way too quickly for my liking, and the end of our date approached with rapid speed. The train was more crowded than it had been earlier since school had just been let out for the day. There were no seats left so we stood close together in a corner, his arm curled around me to keep me upright. Before long, we arrived just outside of my apartment.

“So… would you be down to do something like this again?” he asked, a tiny smile on his face. “Maybe we could actually do the dinner and a movie that I suggested first?”

I laughed, poking him on the arm. “Hey, you’re the one who changed the plans! I was fine with the original plans.”

“Well… maybe if I never take you for that dinner and a movie, then you’ll have to keep going out with me,” Peter teased.

“I don’t care what the date is,” I smiled. “I just want to spend time with you.”

He smiled back and hugged me, pressing a kiss against my temple. I wrapped my arms around his middle, squeezing him tightly. Then he did something unexpected…

Peter winced.

I pulled hurriedly away from him, shock written across every one of my features. “Wait… you’re still not healed?”

Chapter Text

I tried to look calm as I led him up the stairs to my apartment, his hand entwined with mine, but inside I was anxious as hell. Peter was quiet beside me, stroking his thumb back and forth over the back of my hand in what I assumed was supposed to be a soothing way. His attempts fell flat; I was far too worried for that to calm me down.

Emily met us at the door, dressed in her work clothes and on her way out. She grinned, a mischievous glint in her eye. “Oh hey, you two,” she said, slipping her keys back in her handbag. “I’m going to take a wild guess and say the date went well if you’re back here.”

I gave her a smile, an incredibly weak smile, and edged past her to the door. “Excuse us, Em.”

She narrowed her eyes and tilted her head to the side. “Or… maybe not so well?”

Peter stepped closer to me and slipped his arm around my shoulders. “The date went really well. We’re just going to chill out now, maybe watch some movies.”

She looked at him appraisingly and then moved her eyes to me, waiting for me to confirm his words. I nodded, leaning into him slightly to try and convince her.

“Yeah, I figured he’s never really hung out here before and we didn’t want the date to end yet,” I said. My words weren’t a lie, despite them not being 100% accurate in that moment. We really hadn’t wanted the date to end and maybe after we’d finished talking, we would just lounge on the couch and watch movies.

“Okay…” Emily said slowly, still not sounding entirely convinced.

I reached out and pushed her shoulder, offering her another half-real smile. “Go on, you’re gonna be late for work. I’ll text you later, okay?”

She rolled her eyes, shifting her handbag higher up on her shoulder. “Alright, alright, I’m going.”

She eyed Peter once more before heading off down the hallway, her footsteps hurried to make sure she made it in time to catch her train. I stared after her before moving to the apartment door. A few flecks of brown paint that were peeling away from the door caught my attention and I brushed them away, definitely not procrastinating at all. 

When we were inside, I ignored the tiny living room and led him into my just as tiny bedroom. For whatever this conversation was about to be, I wanted to be in a comfortable and familiar setting. With Emily gone, there was no need to close the door for privacy so I just sat down on the bed. Peter sat beside me, leaving a little gap between us.

Words left me and we sat in silence for a few minutes while I collected my thoughts. Peter wasn’t unaffected by the tension. He shifted his position and bounced his leg and bit his lip to try and stay quiet, but he succeeded, waiting until I was ready to talk.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” I finally asked, staring down at my hands, clasped together tightly in my lap.

“I didn’t want to worry you,” he sighed.

“Well, you didn’t really succeed on that one,” I groaned quietly, flopping backward on the bed, landing with a quiet thump. “Yeah it was a pretty bad injury, but this seems like a seriously long time for you to still be recovering from it.”

“You’re not wrong,” he admitted, a frown on his face. Almost subconsciously, he ran his fingers over his injured side. “My healing should have taken care of this in like a day… but it’s uhh… malfunctioning right now.”

I raised my head to look at him. “Wait… Tony said the bot that got you might have had something on it. Did the tests come back with anything?”

He nodded, shifting slightly on the bed. “Yeah, he found this weird chemical in my system. It doesn’t seem to be affecting anything other than my healing, so… you know, that’s a good thing.”

“Umm yeah sorry, I’m not quite at the ‘looking at the bright side’ stage just yet,” I mumbled, lifting my arms up to do air quotes before dropping them down to cover my face. “What are you gonna do about the chemical?”

“We’re working on flushing it out right now.” Peter shuffled back on the bed and rested his back against the wall. I let out a tiny sigh as he threaded his fingers into my hair, scratching lightly against my scalp. “We still have the sample Tony took and we’re trying to analyse it further. You know, to figure out why it’s affecting me like this and how to get rid of it.”

“It seems kind of targeted,” I frowned. “Like those bots, or at least the one you fought, were coated in this shit.”

He hummed thoughtfully. “Well… it’s possible it could have been harmful to Tony or Rhodey as well. It might be that it just affected me differently than it would have affected either one of them.”

“I guess,” I sighed. “Can you promise me something, though?”

“What’s that?” he asked, tugging his fingers through a stray knot in my hair.

“Please keep me in the loop,” I said. I moved my hands away from my face, folding them over my stomach, so I could look up at him. “This is the kind of thing that I would have much preferred to have known and, believe me, I get the whole protecting me thing, but I just… yeah...”

Peter nodded, his hand never pausing as it stroked over my head. “Yeah… yeah, you’re right. I’m sorry. I promise I’ll be better about keeping you updated.”

“In return, I’ll keep you informed about all the important things in my life,” I chuckled. “Like about bitchy old lady at work and the latest gossip from Em and Jazzy.”

“Gossip from your best friend and her girlfriend?” he laughed, a clear and beautiful sound that cleared the last of the awful tension from the room. “Alright, I can’t wait. Anything that’s important to you is important to me.”

“You’re sweet,” I smiled, nuzzling my head against his hand.

“So… not mad at me anymore?” he asked, his worry only slightly evident in his voice.

I pushed myself up on the bed and adjusted myself, pulling Peter along with me, until we were cuddled up together. He rested his head against my pillows and my face ended up pressed into his neck. My fingers traced patterns across his chest, pulling and bunching up the fabric of his shirt with every movement. My other arm was somewhat trapped, pressed between our bodies, and would likely go numb, but I couldn’t find it in myself to care.

“Wasn’t mad… just worried,” I muttered, my nerves finally settled… for the most part, at least. “But yeah, I’m okay now.” 

His fingers stroked along my back, moving back and forth between bare skin and fabric. “You know… I mean, obviously I don’t want to worry you, but… it is nice to have someone who cares as much as you do.”

“Of course I care,” I said, turning my head to press a gentle kiss on his jawline. “You mean a lot to me.”

He took a deep breath, his body tensing up momentarily. “To be honest… for a long time, I didn’t have a lot of people in my corner. It was just my aunt May and my friend Ned. I lost both of my parents when I was really young and then I lost my uncle Ben a few years back…”

I stayed quiet, letting him talk through his thoughts, but my heart ached for him, for the boy who had been through so much and lost so many people at such a young age. I curled my arm around his middle and hugged him, trying to silently offer comfort.

Peter’s voice shook a little as he continued on. “I’ve spent a lot of time thinking that all of that must mean that if people get close to me, they’ll get hurt. So I didn’t want to get close to people. I didn’t go out and meet people because I was afraid of making those connections with people. I was even scared to meet my soulmate, the person most people were beyond excited to meet, because I was just so terrified that something would happen to them. And I had those thoughts even before I became Spider-Man and they only grew worse after that.”

“And now?” I asked, softly.

“I still worry… I still have those thoughts,” he confessed. “But they’re not as frequent anymore, I think. I’m stronger now, I have Tony, I have a team. Now, it’s not just me on my own, completely confused and lost and struggling with what I’d become. 

“But my biggest strength is still my anonymity. With Tony, people can target Pepper and know that Tony would risk pretty much everything to keep her safe. Keeping my identity a secret means that I’m keeping you, May, and my friends safe. That’s what matters most to me. Protecting people and trying to make a difference is important, of course, but I would give it up in a heartbeat to protect the people I care about.”

“You’re a strong guy, Peter, and I don’t mean physically,” I said. “I don’t think many people could have gone through all the shit that you’ve been through and still be a good person, but you’re still so good and you care so fucking much. You just want to make a positive difference, giving no thought at all to your own personal gain, and there aren’t a lot of people like that in the world. You’re an amazing person and I’m grateful every single day that you are my soulmate.”

He didn’t reply, his body still. I waited a few seconds before I pushed up, questioning words about to fall from my lips, but those words immediately left me when I saw the look on his face. His mouth curled up at the sides in a soft smile and his dark eyes were locked onto mine. He looked almost awestruck, just filled with wonder.

My heart skipped a beat and I smiled back. My voice was barely above a whisper when I asked, “What is it?”

“I love you.”

My heart stopped beating altogether and I sucked in a surprised breath. “You… you do?”

He nodded, that beautiful smile on his face growing bigger. “Yeah… I do.”

“I love you too,” I breathed. The words felt so natural as they left me that the idea of being nervous didn’t even occur to me.

Peter’s face completely lit up and suddenly there was way too much distance between us. We moved almost completely in sync; he curled one arm around my waist and his hand moved to the back of my neck as I leaned down to press our lips together, brushing my free hand against his cheek. 

This kiss felt different from all of the other kisses we’d shared together. This kiss, more than any of the others, truly made me feel like Peter and I were two halves of the same soul. I’d never felt more connected to anyone in my entire life. We parted for breath together and we deepened the kiss together. Every nip, every lick, every suck, every quiet moan… Every movement felt more like it came from one mind rather than two.

Minutes could have passed by in the time we spent entwined on my crappy little bed or hours could have passed, I could honestly say I had no idea. Every so often, one of us would quietly whisper those three words again, just breathy repetitions of “I love you”, and every single time, whether he said it or I said it, the words would send a joyful thrill down my spine.

When we finally pulled apart, our positions had changed. He’d flipped us over so that he could take more control, his body positioned tantalisingly between my spread legs. His button-down shirt had been discarded and thrown to the side and I spent a great deal of time exploring the expanse of his back with my hands, memorising the feel of his body against mine. I was also fairly certain that I had at least one brand new hickey on my neck.

In the time we’d been together, this was the first really intense makeout session we’d had. Most of the time we’d spent together had been getting to know each other’s personalities and well… identities. This was the first step into getting to know each other physically and it was pretty damn safe to say that we got along well. This was also the first time he’d been in the apartment and his tour had been pretty much limited to my bed and not much else. I ran my fingers through his hair, smiling fondly as he leant automatically into my touch. 

Out of the corner of my eye, a light flipping on caught my attention. It was only then, when I glanced out through my window to the world outside, that I noticed the sun had set.

“Oh crap, I didn’t notice it had gotten so late,” I exclaimed. “It’s already dark.”

He looked over as well, his eyebrows rising up in surprise. “Oh shit, you’re right. I guess I should head home. May’s probably starting to wonder where I am.”

“Yeah… okay.” I bit my lip, trying to hide my disappointment. 

Peter smiled down at me knowingly. “Or… you could always come over to my place. You’d get to meet May and, if you wanted, you could spend the night.”

“God that sounds wonderful, but I have to work super early tomorrow,” I sighed. “Maybe the weekend? I get off early on Friday so I could come after that, if you wanted.”

“Sounds like a plan to me,” he said, his legs brushing against mine as he stretched.

I pushed myself up and leaned on my elbow so I could see him better. “So… does May know about the whole masked vigilante thing?” I asked.

“I mean, I am officially an Avenger. I don’t think I really count as a vigilante anymore,” Peter laughed.

“Details, details.” I dismissed his words with a wave of my hand. 

“Yeah, Aunt May knows,” he nodded, smiling faintly. “The way she found out about it… wasn’t ideal. I’d planned on breaking the news to her at some point, but she came into my room when I was trying on a new suit that Tony made me and I’d maybe kind of forgotten that my door was still open.”

I raised an eyebrow. “You’re lucky she didn’t have a guest or anything like that otherwise your secret wouldn't have been a secret for very long.”

He chuckled. “In my defence, she wasn’t supposed to be home for hours yet so I wasn’t expecting anyone in the apartment at all.”

“How did she take it?”

“Well…I don’t hear my aunt swear that often so that was a new experience.” Peter’s eyes crinkled at the corners as he smiled at the memory. “But after a lot of talking and explaining and calling Tony, she calmed down. She’s cool with it now, for the most part anyway. Obviously she doesn’t like it when I get hurt, but yeah.”

“Seems like a reasonable thing for her to dislike,” I said.

“I’m really excited for you to meet her,” Peter smiled, rubbing his hand down my arm. “I think you two are gonna get along really well.”

I bit my lip and sat up, the sheets rustling quietly with my movements. “Yeah? Can I admit that I’m kinda nervous to meet her?”

He tilted his head, looking at me curiously. “Really? Why?”

“Because she’s your family!” I explained. “I’m pretty sure it’s a safe bet to say that her approval means a lot to you and so I want her to like me. I really want to make a good first impression.”

“That’s adorable and sweet as hell,” he smiled, pushing himself up so he was sitting cross-legged. His bandaged torso was visible for two seconds before he tugged his shirt back down over it. “But you really have nothing to worry about. Aunt May is really laid back and I know she’s going to absolutely adore you.”

“Okay, that makes me feel a little better.” I reached over and laced my fingers through his. “I do have one last question…”

“Yeah, what’s that?”

My face broke out into a huge grin. “Is she going to break out the photo albums? I want to see all the embarrassing pictures of you.”

“I’m regretting this already.”

* * * * * * * *

The next day started out perfectly normally. Jasmine spent the night at our apartment and I came out of my room to see the two of them curled up on the couch together as they watched the morning news, the sunlight filtering through the windows and bathing the pair in pale light, resembling some sort of modern renaissance painting. The fridge was empty of anything resembling breakfast foods and, not wanting to disturb the nauseatingly cute couple, I left the apartment and started the walk to get us some breakfast.

The sun didn’t offer much warmth so I tugged my jacket tighter around my middle then shoved my hands into my pockets. There weren’t that many people on the streets so my walk was delightfully peaceful. Well... as peaceful as a walk through New York City could get anyway. I matched my footsteps to the beat of the music playing through my earphones, low-key acting like the star of my own music video.

I felt positive and honestly just like I was on top of the world. I had an amazing boyfriend who loved me back, a decent job, a decent apartment, an amazing best friend/roommate and things were looking up. In such a short period of time, my life had changed drastically. Suddenly, I’d met my soulmate, who’d turned out to be such a wonderful and amazing person who was so incredibly easy to fall in love with. And also that the guy was Spider-Man, a plot twist I wouldn’t have seen coming in a million years. Not to mention the fact that, because of meeting my soulmate, I now had Tony Stark listed as a contact in my phone which I still found hard to believe. I wasn’t just going to out of the blue message the guy, but the fact that I could if I wanted to was beyond mind-blowing.

My feet beat rhythmically against the pavement, each of my steps punctuated with a sharp slap. A gentle breeze blew my hair back and I smiled, closing my eyes for a brief second. The bakery wasn’t that far away from the apartment and I felt like prolonging the walk, finding the day to be far too pleasant, despite the chill, to spend it cooped up inside. And Emily and Jasmine wouldn’t mind that much if I took an extra ten or fifteen minutes to get back home. I’m sure they would put that time to good use; they never complained when faced with an empty apartment. 

The line in the bakery was surprisingly long; apparently it wasn’t just me who thought the day was worth spending outside. I didn’t mind waiting though and I spent the time looking at all their fresh baked goods, sealed behind trendy industrial chic style cases. The place was unapologetically hipster, adapting to each and every food trend that came around. Their rainbow bagels had been such a hit that they were now on the permanent menu. 

About ten minutes later, I walked back outside with my purchased items safely packed away in a plastic bag. It was very natural to fall back into that slow and leisurely pace and even the shuffled songs seemed to agree, playing the slower songs in my playlist. The plastic bag swung back and forth with every step I took, rustling as it brushed against my leg as it moved past. Another peaceful smile grew on my face.

And then I heard the screams.

My pleasant walk suddenly came to an abrupt halt. I ripped the earphones from my ears and jerked around to see what the issue was. The streets were more populated than they had been earlier and every single one of the people on the street were all looking and pointing up at the sky. 

They were mostly covered in dramatic dark green cloaks, but occasionally the sunlight would glint off of the severely shiny forms of the six humanoid figures that flew through the air above New York City. How they were flying I had no idea, but thanks to the extremely in-depth research I’d done (aka a google search), those beings were Doom-Bots. The same Doom-Bots that had attacked the city and injured Peter only a couple weeks ago. As far as I knew, there had never been two attacks by Doom-Bots this close together.

Why had they come back so soon? Well, whatever their reason, I knew it couldn’t be good.

I tore my eyes away from the looming threat and fumbled through my bag to look through my phone, which was being infuriatingly elusive. Just as I found it and unlocked it, getting ready to send a warning text to Peter, the screams grew louder. I glanced up to see that the Bots had suddenly broken out of their loose formation. They each descended down into the city and, to my horror, one headed straight for the street that I was currently standing on. People started running and I snapped out of my shock, stuffing my phone back in my bag and running along with them.

Each of my footsteps was paired with a loud slap, combining with everyone else’s around me to create an alarming cacophony of noise that just screamed panic. Parents gripped tightly onto their children’s hands and forced them to keep running, even as the children tried to spin around to see the danger. I resisted the urge to glance back, knowing that it would only do more harm than good. I darted around a man helping up a fallen woman. She was unharmed and mostly back on her feet anyway, so I kept running. Ahead, I saw people heading down into a subway entrance to take cover underground. Deciding it was a good idea, I headed straight for it. 

The stairwell was only a short distance away, growing closer and closer with each step I took. My breath came out in short pants and I pushed down the anxiety that I could feel building up. This was definitely not the time to start freaking out. The stairs were only a few feet away and I let myself feel hopeful. As soon as I was off the street, I would text Peter and let him know what was going on and then everything would be taken care of.

Then, there was a blur of movement and I skidded to a halt. In my path now stood a metallic humanoid figure, the pavement cracked underneath his feet from his heavy landing. Slowly and silently, he rose to his full height, which was well over 6 foot, and he stared down at me. His silver face offered no hint of emotion, though those vivid glowing red eyes were freaking haunting. 

People scattered around us, abandoning the idea of heading down into the subway tunnel. Their terrified screams continued, but they sounded far away, like a distant echo. My whole body was completely frozen, even my breathing had stopped. There was no way this robot thing could know who I was. We’d been so careful and I’d only been seen with Spider-Man once in public.  This had to be just random chance. And yet, the being didn’t move to start causing destruction, instead just staring directly at me, like it was studying me in great detail, paying no attention to any of the frantic people around us.

“So, this is the one… the partner of the Spider.”

A chill ran down my spine as he spoke for the first time. It was strange… not natural at all. His voice was deep and menacing, thick with what I could only guess was a Latverian accent, and a weird metallic edge to it. My mouth opened, but when no words came out, I closed it again.

“I must admit, I find myself to be… disappointed,” he mused. “I suppose I expected more.”

My eyes widened and my heart skipped a beat as the realisation slammed into me with all the force of a battering ram. “You… You’re not one of the bots, are you?”

Doom tilted his head to the side, the green cloak shifting with the movement. “An astute deduction. Maybe you are not as disappointing as I first thought.”

He continued to stare at me, not even blinking, and I stared back at him. My heart pounded so hard in my chest that I would not have been surprised if he could hear it. I clenched my hands into fists to hide my shaking, the plastic bag crinkling in my grasp. If Peter could face these villain type of guys without fear, then so could I. Well… except for the fact that I didn’t have powers of any kind or an insanely high tech suit or really anything that could be considered remotely useful. And fighting a bad guy with a croissant didn’t exactly seem like a good idea. 

So I was left with one idea. A stupid idea, but an idea nonetheless.

I turned to run.

I didn’t make it more than two steps before a hand wrapped around my arm, yanking me almost completely off my feet. The plastic bag flew from my hand, falling forgotten to the ground. Doom’s grip was beyond tight, constricting the blood flow. Despite all my struggling and throwing my entire strength into attempting to break free, it didn’t seem to bother him in the slightest. Holding me in place seemed to be as easy as blinking.

“I grow tired of this,” he said.

Then, my world exploded into pain. Electricity blasted through every vein and muscle in my body and I couldn’t even remember how to scream. The pain seemed to last forever; had it been five seconds or five hours, five minutes or five days? I honestly couldn’t have answered that. Finally, to my immense relief, the black spots edging my vision took over completely and, just before I  fully lost consciousness, I felt myself being picked up and thrown over a hard metal shoulder. Then I knew no more.

Chapter Text

When I started to come to, the first thing I noticed was the burning ache in my shoulders. My first instinct was to move, to shift my position to something considerably more comfortable, but my arms wouldn’t move an inch. Through my still foggy mind, I tried again, but still they stayed firmly in place. 

As the fog started to clear, I became aware of a second sensation. My arms had been wrenched back behind my body and were tied tightly to the chair I sat on. My wrists were almost numb and my elbows weren’t faring much better. My legs were bound in the same way. To my dismay, the pain only grew worse as my consciousness returned to me.

I lifted my head from where it had been slumped down, chin resting against my chest, and tilted my head from side to side to ease the pain in my neck. On top of all the new pains, my body still ached from the shock that Doom had so kindly given me… however long ago that had been. I blinked my eyes, but the result was the same no matter what. The room I was in was entirely black, no light peeking in from anywhere. It wasn’t even like there were windows that had just been covered up, there was just nothing. 

My heart rate sped up, the urge to struggle against my bindings with every bit of strength I had in me rising with it, and I forced myself to breathe slowly and deeply; panicking wasn’t going to help anything right now. I closed my eyes again, hit by a sudden bout of claustrophobia. 

Breathe in, two, three, four.

Breathe out, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

I kept going until my panic had receded and I could think clearly again. Outside, I could still hear traffic going by, albeit faintly, so I still had to be somewhere in the city. Unless I’d been out for a long time and Doom had had time to take me out of New York City altogether. Okay, yeah, not a good topic to think about. Definitely more panic-inducing than was advisable. 

Breathe in, two, three, four.

Breathe out, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

I tugged once more at my bonds, just to test if they’d somehow miraculously loosened in the ten seconds that had passed since I’d last tried, but to no surprise, they were still solidly in place. The coarse texture of the bonds rubbed harshly at my skin as I shifted minutely, refusing to budge even the slightest inch. A deep ache bit at the muscles in my shoulders and I begrudgingly gave up. 

My mind started racing as soon as my body was still. Did Peter know I was missing? How long had it been since Doom had knocked me out? He must have been watching us to know that I was Peter’s partner. No clue if he knew we were soulmates, but either way, this wasn’t good at all. I sighed and just let my mind wander, dimly aware of the quiet sounds of life just beyond the walls of my prison, to the people who had no idea that I was kept prisoner only a few feet away from them. 

Then, from somewhere in the room, there came the sound of fabric shifting. In the silence, it sounded ten times louder than it would have been normally. I jumped (as much as the chair would allow me to) and all the breath I’d been focusing so hard on left me in a startled gasp. Biting my lip, I forced myself to be silent. The room apparently hadn’t been as empty as I’d originally thought.

“Hello…?” A groggy voice asked. It was a woman and she sounded just as disoriented as I’d been when I’d first woken up.

I swallowed my fear, my nerves making my voice come out quieter than usual. “Uhh… hi?”

“W-where are we?” she asked, shifting slightly in her seat as her mind started to clear. “What… what happened?”

“Honestly? I have no idea where we are. I only woke up a few minutes ago,” I admitted. “Do you remember anything?”

She was quiet for a few seconds before she uncertainly replied, “I’d just gotten home from a shift. As soon as I got in the door, I realised there was someone there waiting for me.”

“What did they look like?”

“I didn’t get a clear look before I was knocked out, but they were pretty tall and wearing a dark cloak,” she answered.

“That sounds a lot like the guy that took me,” I sighed. “It was Doctor Doom. Or one of his bot clones, at least.”

She made a quiet noise of acknowledgement, then cleared her throat. “I’m May, by the way. May Parker. Not sure how long we’ll be locked up in here, but I figure we should know each other’s names at least.

Something clicked in my brain. “Wait… are you Peter’s aunt May?”

There was a second of silence and then May chuckled. “That would be me. And I assume you’re the girl he’s told me so much about.”

“Well that answers that question at least,” I pointed out, frowning worriedly. “Doom definitely knew I was Peter’s girlfriend and if he has you as well, then I think it’s pretty safe to assume that he knows Peter is Spider-Man.”

“This is exactly what he had been so worried about,” May sighed. “This is why he worked so hard to keep his identity a secret. He was so scared about people knowing about the family connection and then me being used as leverage against him.”

A silence fell over the pitch-black room. It wasn’t awkward; we both just needed time to process everything. It didn’t last that long though. Knowing I wasn’t alone in the room made an incredible difference to my thought process and I wanted to fill the silence.

“This definitely isn’t how I pictured meeting you, by the way,” I told her. “I probably would have been just as nervous as I am now though.”

She laughed quietly. “Was the idea of meeting me that scary?”

“A little bit,” I admitted. “You’re Peter’s family. You mean the absolute world to him and I wanted you to like me. I wanted to make a good first impression.”

“Well, Peter has talked about you,” she said, fondness clear in her voice. “A lot actually. And I’ve liked everything I’ve heard.”

I smiled, her words brightening my mood despite the awful situation. “That means a lot. Thank you. Maybe we can try this whole meeting each other thing again, hopefully in a much less dangerous way.” 

Her chair squeaked quietly as May shifted in her bindings. “Ehh, calm is boring. Adding a little action sometimes is the spice of life. Or something like that.”

Before I could reply, our isolation came to a sudden end. First came the sound of heavy footsteps moving outside our room, followed by the extremely loud creak of the door swinging open. Only a faint light was visible from outside our room, but it was just enough to highlight the dark figure standing in the doorway, menacing and imposing. My breath caught in my throat. I instinctively went to shy away from the figure, but the bindings held tight, as I unfortunately knew they would.

“What do you want with us?” May demanded. Her voice stayed even and firm, betraying no hint of fear that she might have been feeling. Her courage impressed me; my throat felt like it had closed up in fear and I didn’t even know if I was capable of speaking at that moment.

The figure took a slow step forward and I saw the faint metallic glint of silver across its cheek as it passed through a thin beam of light. It moved forward with slow, deliberate steps, its feet hitting the floor with muted metallic thuds. May opened her mouth to speak again, but before the words could leave her mouth, the bot raised its arm. I could hear the barest hum of electricity and my eyes widened, knowing what was coming.

It grabbed May’s shoulder and the woman went rigid, throwing her head back with an aborted cry of pain. The pain she was experiencing was all too familiar to me, and though she couldn’t scream, I suddenly found I could.

“Stop!” I cried, my voice cracking in my terror. “Fucking let her go, please ! Just stop hurting her!”

The bot remained silent, but it turned its head to stare at me, it’s eyes uncaring as it contained to shock May. I begged and pleaded and yanked against my restraints until the skin of my wrists was sore and bloody. It couldn’t have been more than a minute or so, but fuck . I felt so helpless, watching Peter’s only remaining relative be tortured. 

Finally, it released its grip. May’s head fell forward and she was completely limp, shocked into unconsciousness. The bot glanced down at her for a few seconds and then turned it’s gaze back on me. A chill ran down my spine as it stepped menacingly forward, reaching its arm out towards me. 

The touch of cold metal on my skin. That familiar agonising pain coursing through my muscles. Then darkness once more.

* * * * * * * *

I sluggishly blinked, far too aware of the deep ache I could feel in every single one of my muscles and the throbbing ache in my head. As soon as I opened my eyes, the stark white light was a harsh contrast to the darkness I’d been trapped in… however long ago that was. The light was too painful, so I closed my eyes again. 

As the fog began to clear from my brain, I realised that I was definitely not on the ground. My legs kicked out helplessly, desperately searching for solid ground. Behind me, my arms were still tightly bound, pins and needles shooting through them as I stretched out my fingers.

After a couple more attempts, I managed to keep my eyes open. A strangled gasp tore from my throat. Underneath my dangling feet was New York City; the safety of the ground hundreds of feet below me. A nearby skyscraper window revealed that, just behind me, a Doom-Bot had a tight grip on my restraints. I couldn’t say my shoulders appreciated that; the deep burn in my shoulders was growing worse by the second. My heart pounded almost painfully in my chest, knowing that if it let go, there was only one way I would go.

“(Y/N)?” 

“May?” My voice was surprisingly raspy, making me aware of just how dry my throat was. How long had they had us for? 

With a quiet groan, I turned my head to the side to see May in an identical situation to me: arms tightly bound behind her back, held precariously aloft by a flying metal being. May’s hair, likely once pulled back into a neat bun, now looked rather dishevelled, some long strands hanging over her face. She half-heartedly blew at them to try and clear her vision, but they settled almost mockingly back over her face. Her clothes were in a similar state of disarray as well. 

“Are you okay, sweetheart?” May asked, her eyes searching my face and moving up and down my body as if to reassure herself that I was, at least for that moment, alright.

“Oh you know, just hanging out,” I weakly chucked. 

My attempt at humour was rewarded with May’s quiet laughter. That brief positive moment didn’t last long.

“Well… isn’t this touching?” Descending from above, like some kind of evil metallic angel with a superiority complex, came who I could only assume was Dr Doom himself. “I hope the pair of you found your accommodations to be satisfactory.”

I wanted nothing more than to fire back at him with an amazingly witty remark, something you’d hear in an action movie or a superhero movie, but I wasn’t a hero. I wasn’t tough or brave (stupid?) enough to be snarky to a supervillain. All I could offer was a glare, an expression that was mirrored on May’s face.

Doom’s expression was totally hidden by his mask, but his voice was incredibly mocking. “Hmm… not to your liking then? What a pity.”

A deep rumbling caught Doom’s attention as something exploded in the distance, rattling the windows of the nearby buildings. Below us, people started screaming once more, running for cover, desperate to get away from danger. He turned away from us, seeming to revel in the chaos, his dark green cloak flowing out behind him and waving in the wind.

“How interesting that people still choose to be out on the streets,” he noted quietly, likely speaking more to himself than to us. “Twenty four hours of mayhem and still they venture out to get their coffee and go about their days.”

I blinked slowly, completely stunned. Surely I had heard him wrong... Had he seriously had me and May as his hostages for an entire day?! We must have been unconscious for a fucking long time. I was thinking it had only been like… maybe a couple of hours at most. Not an entire freaking day.

“And how fares the city’s heroes, I wonder? How fares your precious Spider?” Doom continued, letting out a brief, harsh-sounding chuckle. “I suppose we shall find out momentarily.”

With that, Doom seemed content to just listen to the sounds of terror and destruction, not paying May or I even the slightest bit of attention. The bots holding us up didn’t speak either, though I was sure they were capable of speech. Any movement they made turned my stomach, and despite my desire to not look down, my eyes just kept returning to the huge drop below me.

In an attempt to distract myself, I turned my attention back to May. Peter had shown me selfies they’d taken over the years, so I’d known what May looked like, but it was a whole other thing to actually meet the woman. She had a vibe to her that just screamed ‘mother hen’. That was obvious from how she had welcomed Peter with open arms and loved him as her own, but even in the limited interactions she’d had with me, it was clear how nurturing and protective she was. A warm feeling welled up in my chest, despite everything. I felt extremely special to have her care about me like that.

She was beautiful as well. I knew that May was in her 50’s, but I would not guess that by looking at her. If anything, I would have guessed that she was in her late 30’s… maybe super early 40’s. She noticed me looking her way and she gave me a small smile, though it definitely didn’t reach her eyes. I knew that she was just as worried as I was.

Doom said that the past 24 hours had been full of attacks from his bots. Did that mean that Peter and Tony had been fighting against them for an entire day? If Rhodes was around, he would have jumped in to help, but still, that was only three men against god knew how many robots. Tony and Rhodes were only human, and even Peter had his limits.

Then, starting off quite faint and growing louder, there came the oh so familiar ‘thwip’ sound of webshooters and my heart stopped, a confusing mix of dread and relief fighting in my chest. On the positive side, Peter’s coming! He’s on his way! But on the negative side, Peter’s coming! He’s on his way! This was obviously a trap, how could it be anything else? The only thing that could make it more obvious was a flashing neon sign that said “TRAP!”

I sucked in a breath, held it, then slowly breathed out. All we could do was wait.

And we didn’t have to wait long. Only a few moments later, Peter appeared, clad in his red Spandex-like suit. Firing a web high up on the skyscraper opposite us, he yanked himself up in the air, flipped once, then clung effortlessly to the side of the building. His mask hid his expression fairly well, but his tension was obvious in how he held his shoulders and the ever so subtle way his eyes flicked back and forth between me, May and Doom. I offered him my best attempt at a smile, though I’m sure it came out a lot shakier than I would have liked.

“And the young hero arrives,” Doom announced, extending his arms out in a twisted sort of welcome. “So good of you to join us.” 

“Doom!” Peter called back, his voice impressively strong and firm. It had only been a little over a day since I’d heard his voice last, but god had I missed it. “They have nothing to do with this.”

The caped man tilted his head back, chuckled darkly, then fixed Peter with a hard stare. “I disagree, young man. It was you who brought them into this. The second you put on that suit, you chose this.”

My soulmate froze for a split second, eyes darting back and forth again. He clenched his fist and continued on, voice a touch shakier. “Look… this is between you and me… and your bots, or whatever, but (Y/N) and May are innocent. They’re civilians. Please… leave them out of this.”

Doom didn’t reply immediately, choosing instead to draw out the intense silence. His frigid stare moved from Peter over to May, and then to me. It was impossible to get a read on the man’s thoughts; his blank metallic mask gave away absolutely nothing. 

Almost lazily, he turned back to Peter. When he spoke again, his voice was… wistful wasn’t the right word, but maybe thoughtful was a better fit. “I’ve been watching you for a while now, Spider. Most ‘heroes’ that I’ve encountered are tiresome, boring. Men in suits that fly or suits that shrink, they are hardly worth a thought. Super soldiers are a touch more interesting, but still rather trite.

“And then I heard of a boy with the abilities of a spider. No organisations stepped forward to claim they had created such a being, and he quickly rose in popularity as New York’s beloved hero. My curiosity was piqued. It’s quite an impressive list of abilities you possess. With those abilities, I will admit that I was expecting a challenge. And so imagine my disappointment when I learn that you have the exact same weaknesses as all the others do.”

The words had barely left Doom’s mouth before the bot holding onto May suddenly loosened its grip. With a startled shriek, May fell, kicking her legs out in panic. My heart dropped and I threw myself forward, making it only a couple inches before I was yanked painfully backwards by the Doom-Bot’s grip on my ropes, my shoulder protesting even more. 

My startled gasp of “No!” was overshadowed by Peter’s gut-wrenching cry, screaming his aunt’s name. He seemed torn between trying to reach out to her and trying to leap forward, and in that conflict, he lost his grip on the building and slid down. With trembling hands, he hastily steadied himself and then jerked his head around, preparing to leap to May’s rescue…

Only to see her dangling once more. The bot had dropped down to catch her, only letting her fall a few terrifying feet before grabbing hold of the rope again. It slowly rose back up, returning to the same height it had been at before. May’s head hung low, even more strands of hair now broken free from her bun to obscure her expression, but I could see her chest heaving with anxious breaths. After a few seconds, she glanced up, giving Peter a reassuring smile to let him know that she was okay, but it was clear from her tremors that the fall had seriously shaken her.

Doom stared at the young hero, then slowly shook his head with a disapproving click of his tongue. “Such distress, how… tedious. I had such high hopes for you, Peter Parker, and yet I find myself disappointed.”

Peter looked so tense, his fist clenched tightly, and he even looked like he was shaking, with anger that I assumed he was barely managing to hold back. Angry Peter was something that I had very little experience with. He was always so cheerful, so happy, so light-hearted. Seeing him angry was honestly a little scary. Not that I was scared of him, never that, but just more terrified that he had now been pushed this far. 

Wiggling my fingers, I felt a painful wave of pins and needles shoot through my arms, making me hiss quietly through my teeth at the sensation. The fact that they hadn’t gone completely numb was quite surprising to me since they’d been fairly tightly bound for pretty much an entire day. 

I turned my attention back to May. The woman’s breathing had calmed down thankfully, her chest now rising and falling with slower, deeper breaths. She was focused entirely on Peter, softly smiling at him and mouthing what looked like “I’m okay”. In all the chaos, it was a sweet moment, and oddly enough, I felt like I was intruding on it. I knew Peter was just as worried about me, but he and May had a special bond as well that was equally important to him. 

“You could be so much more than you are right now.” Doom wasn’t done with his speech though and for the first time, he didn’t sound as emotionless as his bots. He sounded… genuinely perplexed, which in turn seemed to be a source of frustration for him. “You have the power to rule, to command respect and fear, and yet you willingly choose to restrict yourself with laws and weaknesses, to ignore your potential, to ignore what you would be capable of if you just allowed yourself to ignore those limitations, to have no weaknesses. I could help you do that. I can make you better. You have no idea what you could do… what you could be if you worked for me.”

“You threaten the lives of my aunt and my soulmate… and you want me to work with you?!” Peter seethed.

The man raised a gloved hand and waved it dismissively. “I am prepared to do whatever needs to be done in order to get that which I desire. In time, perhaps you’ll even come to share my opinions on matters such as this.”

“Something tells me that isn’t going to happen,” Pete retorted, shaking his head in furious disbelief.

Doom raised his shoulders and let them fall, a mockingly exaggerated shrug. “Such a pity. But you are young, perhaps it is not so surprising that you cannot see the flawless logic behind my generous offer.”

“I don’t care how ‘generous’ you think your offer is. I’m not interested in helping anyone like you, no matter how highly they seem to think of themselves.” Peter was now in full Spider-Man mode. Always wanting to do the right thing, to stop the bad guys, to try and get as many people that happy ending as he could. Some might call him foolishly idealistic, but I envied him for that steadfast optimism. 

“I do not make this kind of offer very regularly, so I do not appreciate being turned down.” Any humour Doom had had before was now gone. He gestured lazily towards me and May. “If you will not accept my offer, I could always force you to cooperate.” 

Being used as leverage really wasn’t fun. It honestly felt agonising, being forced to just sit (unfortunately not literally) and watch Peter’s distress, unable to help him or do anything to make the situation easier or better. The last thing I’d wanted to become was a damsel in distress and yet it seemed that was exactly what I had become. There was something vaguely dehumanising about it: May and I had been reduced to just people who were important to Peter, no value outside of that. Though obviously, that opinion was entirely just Doom’s and his opinion didn’t mean shit, but still... my pride didn’t appreciate it.

“Why?!” Peter demanded, his voice tight with barely restrained emotion. “Why are you doing this?”

Doom raised his hand and placed it flat against his chest, directly over his heart, though whether or not he actually had one was up for debate. “Oh young Peter, I swear that I only have the noblest and most honourable of intentions. I merely want to ensure that you are truly living up to your potential. And if you require a small… let’s say... push to achieve that potential, then so be it.”

“A ‘push’ is encouragement or maybe a hard task or challenge or something like that,” Peter cried. “Not this .”

“A hard task, hmm? I don’t think you’re quite understanding the situation here,” Doom chuckled darkly, the sound sending a shiver down my spine. “Well luckily for you, it just so happens that I have quite a difficult task for you. See these two behind me? All you have to do… is choose one.”

My soulmate paused, wary. “And then what?”

“The one you choose shall remain exactly as they are. As for the one you do not choose…” Doom let his words trail off, then very deliberately looked straight down.

There was a heavy silence as the gravity of his words sunk in. Then Peter jerkily shook his head, his voice just as unsteady. “What?! Wait, you can’t just… No! I can’t, I won’t make that decision! Just stop, please. They are innocent!”

“I grow tired of this, boy. Make the decision or I will,” Doom said, sharply. “One falls, a clearly much-needed demonstration for you. The other lives, your incentive to behave.”

Peter’s head continued to shake back and forth. I wasn’t sure if he was even seeing us or if he was just completely in shock. Finally, his movements slowed and came to a stop. He clenched his fist tightly, though that didn’t stop the clear trembling I could see. “...No. I won’t make that decision and I won’t let you make it either.”

“So much time and effort… just for it to amount to nothing. What a disappointment,” Doom sighed. Despite his words, he sounded more indifferent than anything else. “I wonder if you will be able to live with yourself… when you find yourself alone.”

That was all the warning we were given before I felt the Doom-Bot loosened its grip and let the rope slide between its fingers. I fell for a brief second - my stomach flipping wildly, meeting Peter’s gaze, his eyes just as wide with panic as mine - before the rope seemed to catch on the Bot’s hands again. That moment of respite didn’t last long. The rope tugged free and I was falling again.

May’s scream joined mine, a horrific and shrill cacophony, and I knew she was falling too. The pull of the rope yanked my arms backwards, sending me careening to the ground like I was skydiving, but tragically without the parachute. Overhead, I could hear Peter being swarmed by the Bots, the sounds of him struggling, but the unforgiving ground rushing up to meet me held my attention. 

I twisted, awkwardly throwing my shoulder back, and I found myself facing the sky again. The sunlight was almost blinding, but I forced my eyes open, frustratedly blinking through the wateriness that welled up. Not even a second later, a bright flash of red blinded me even more, and I could only just hear the roar of thrusters over the sound of the wind rushing past my ears.

Appearing from over the top of a building, Iron Man flew in, reaching his arm out to drag the Bots off of Peter’s body, blasting a beam of energy at Doom as he flew by. Doom glanced once more at Peter before focusing his attention on the billionaire, his cape flapping out behind him as he dodged a second blast. The group disappeared once more, their fight taking them out of sight, obscured by yet another nondescript building. Peter wasted no time, immediately jumping down after us.

Just above me, May tugged frantically at her restraints, loosening up the ropes maybe a microscopic amount, not enough to earn her freedom. She hadn’t fallen quite as far as I had yet, her Bot having dropped her a second later than mine did. Blowing wildly around her head, hair tie now long gone, her brunette locks gave off a sort of chaotic halo vibe. 

Time felt like it was both slowing down and speeding up, the sharp rush of the wind and the buildings racing past my peripheral vision contrasting greatly with the almost sluggish movements of May, Peter and myself. It didn’t feel real… like a nightmare I was trapped in, that I would be released from upon hitting the ground. I might wake up scared and breathless, but I would still wake. As much as I wanted this to be just another one of those nightmares, I knew it wasn’t. There would be no waking up safe and sound in my bed if I smashed into the unforgiving pavement below, that would just be it. Most likely, it would be the end of me. 

Coming face to face with my own mortality was not something I’d expected to be confronted with, and falling to my death after being dropped by a super villain’s minion was probably the last thing I would have ever expected. If I’d never met Peter that one fateful night, if I hadn’t heard those words I’d been waiting for my entire life without even realising what I was actually hearing, I wouldn’t be in this situation. I wouldn’t have been targeted by a mad man hell-bent on world domination or general chaos and destruction or whatever Doom really wanted. Yet through all of that, despite all of the craziness that had come into my life upon meeting Peter, I didn’t regret a single second of it. He’s my soulmate, for better or for worse, and I love him.

I let my eyes fall shut, tears squeezing their way out of my closed eyelids, born both from emotion and actually not being able to keep them open any longer. But only seconds later came the sound of Peter’s webshooters firing and a strangled yelping sound. My eyes flew open again just in time to see May’s body swinging out of view, Peter’s webbing securely attached to a crane perched atop a nearby building, guiding her away from danger and to the safety of the rooftop.

Peter now focused entirely on me. He raised one arm up and turned the other downwards, webshooters poised to fire towards me, but he hesitated. It took a second for it to click in my mind, but then I understood. If he fired a web upwards after webbing me, the stop in momentum could be seriously bad for me. I didn’t have the Spider abilities that he had, and even with his lack of healing, he would be much more likely to survive than I would.

So he changed tactics. He tucked his arms tightly against his body, streamlining his body as much as he was able, and his speed increased, closing the distance between us more and more with each passing second. With no idea how close we were to the ground, I could only hope that he would make it in time. My heart beat wildly in my chest, the feeling pulsing down to even the tips of my toes, the sound almost echoing in my ears. I could only stare at him, my soulmate, my hero, my Peter as he inched closer and closer to me.

Then finally, finally , he closed the gap between us and wrapped an arm around me, his other arm raised up to fire another line of web. We swung up, away from the danger of the street below, looking like it was only about a storey or two away in the brief, nauseating glance I got at it over Peter’s shoulder. I longed to wrap my arms around him, to relish in the safety of his grip, to hug him back as fiercely as he was holding me, as well as to give myself that extra layer of protection so that I didn’t fall, but the bonds still held tight, gripping my chafed wrists mercilessly. 

“I’ve got you. You’re safe.” Peter repeated the words like a mantra, as if he was reassuring himself more than he was reassuring me. I smiled and pressed my face against the side of his neck.

But only a second later, his tone changed again.

“Oh god, no no no...”

His arm tightened around my waist and I jerked my head back up to see yet another building, and we were approaching it much too quickly. With me as a passenger, he couldn’t react as quickly or as deftly as he could on his own, not to mention that he was already fatigued after Doom’s attacks. Our eyes met and we both realised what was about to happen. Peter angled us so we were suddenly swinging backwards, and then tucked me against himself as much as he could. I braced myself, eyes squeezing shut…

He took the brunt of the impact, his body smashing against the cold stone with terrifying force, his head hitting the wall with an alarming crack , a tortured scream tearing from his throat. Despite his best efforts, I did not get out unharmed. My right arm, already in an odd position, twisted further, red hot pain searing through it and up my shoulder. The only positive I could find was that the impact helped loosen the ropes around my wrists enough that I could yank my arms free, the movement as painful as it was a relief. My head jerked to the side, but ended up only pressing against Peter’s body, protected from the stone wall.

Almost immediately, we started to fall once more. His instincts kicked in and he rapidly fired a few more blasts of webbing, securing us to the rough surface. Tears streamed freely down my cheeks, the pain almost overwhelming. I wanted nothing more than to curl up in a ball and cry, to be weak and lose myself in the pain and emotion for a while, but I knew that Peter was far, far worse off than I was. 

His breath came out in shallow pants, his entire body trembling uncontrollably. I couldn’t even imagine how much pain he was in or even just how extensive his injuries truly were. Even scarier was the dark red patch I could see spreading across the back of his head and neck. It was subtle, blending in almost entirely with the red colour of his suit, but it was definitely there.

“I’ve got you… you’re safe,” Peter mumbled, his words slurring together. “I’ve got you… you’re safe.”

His head rolled forward, landing on my shoulder with a muted thud, then he buried his face in my neck, still repeating those same words like it was all he was capable of saying. I ran my hand soothingly up and down his side, ever mindful of his injured ribs. 

“That’s right, Peter,” I said quietly, my throat sore from screaming. “I’m safe, May is safe, and you’re safe. It’s gonna be okay.”

He was quiet for a while, his body still rocked by pained tremors, unsteady breaths warm against my neck. My hand continued it’s slow, hopefully calming, pattern along his skin, though he didn’t react in any way, aside from the occasional gut wrenching whimper. However, that moment of calm did not last long. A harsh shiver shook Peter’s body and he let out a pained and exhausted sounding moan.

“I can’t… Please no…” Peter pleaded, weakly, his grip around me tightening.

“Peter, what-”

Out of the corner of my eye, a flicker of movement caught my attention. I jerked my head up and locked eyes with Doom, who was hovering menacingly overhead. My heart immediately dropped, that cold expressionless mask sending waves of dread through me. Ignoring the flash of pain in my arm, I instinctively clutched onto Peter tighter, my desire to protect him outweighing the knowledge that I was unlikely to be helpful in a fight. At Peter’s quiet groan of pain, I eased my grip slightly.

How long had he been there, just watching us? When Tony had appeared, distracting Doom, the optimistic hopefully side of me rejoiced that the threat was gone. But with the threat staring right at me, that optimist was silent, already dreading the worst.

A few more agonising moments passed and then Doom rushed towards us, his cape flapping ominously behind him. Peter groaned weakly again. I glanced at him, wishing desperately that I could see his face, then I looked back up. As Doom rapidly closed the distance, his arm lifted, terrifying sparks of lightning shooting from his palm. My eyes squeezed tightly shut, I pulled Peter even closer against me, his head curled into my neck as I shielded him as best I could.

A loud bang echoed through my ears, rattling the building we frantically clung to. I grit my teeth, waiting for the pain to set in, but the seconds ticked by and no pain came.

Peter mumbled incoherently, his hands gripping at me tighter whenever a particularly hard shudder tore through him. With my good arm, I stroked his shoulder absently, but my head whipped back around, the motion fast enough to leave me dizzy.

The sun glanced off dark metal, casting a blinding glare into my eyes, making the scene before me hard to decipher. Two metallic humanoid figures grappled in midair, trading blasts of lightning and energy at each other. If this second figure that had suddenly appeared was fighting Doom, that meant he was our friend… or at least not our enemy.

Another metallic figure flew into view, this one a very familiar and comforting shade of red. Iron Man made a hurried beeline for us, stopping mere inches away.

“I’m getting you kids out of here,” he said, his voice just barely audible over the sounds of thrusters and the ongoing fight behind him. He sounded calm, but I could hear the concern in his voice.

“Peter’s hurt really bad, Tony.” I leaned slightly away from Peter to give Tony a better look, hissing quietly as the movement shifted my arm. “But what about Doom? He’s still-”

Tony shook his head. “Rhodey has him under control, so don’t worry. Right now, all you need to focus on is that I’m getting you two to safety.”

“And May?”

“She’s fine for right now. As soon as you too are taken care of, I’ll come right back and grab her too,” he promised.

“Okay…”

The webbing made it pretty much impossible to move out of the way, so it was a painfully slow process getting both of us untangled. Ever so carefully, Tony tore through the webbing with the specially crafted web dissolver the pair had created. Each section that he dissolved made the web less and less stable, sending waves of panic through me as I imagined myself falling once more. 

Peter was stuck behind me, so I found myself free first. Tony gripped onto me tightly as I pulled free, then carried me a few feet away to a nearby balcony, before flying back to my soulmate. Terrifyingly, Peter hadn’t reacted at all to his mentor’s appearance, still shaking but now silent. 

Another blast of energy sent tremors through the city, neither Doom nor Rhodey gaining the upper hand. Thankfully at least, none of the villain’s bots had shown up to rejoin the fight.

A few agonisingly long seconds later, Tony pried Peter off the wall. The man spoke in a quiet voice, soothing Peter’s wounded cries, both a touching and heartbreaking scene for me to witness. Cradling his student to the chest of his suit, he rose back up to eye level with me.

“Okay, I can’t carry both of you like this, so we’re gonna have to piggyback this,” Tony warned. “I know you’re injured, but I’ll be fairly horizontal majority of the flight, so you should be able to hold on.”

I nodded shakily, the fear of remaining in the heart of the battle far greater than the pain I was experiencing. Tony rotated slowly until his back faced me and I nervously clambered on, circling my good arm around his neck and gripping as hard as I could with my legs. As soon as I was secure, Tony was off, flying quickly but not fast enough that I would be thrown off.

A glance behind us revealed Doom aiming a lightning blast in our direction, but Rhodey quickly intervened, sending the blast firing harmlessly into the air. Then we flew around a building and the pair vanished from sight.

Despite being away from the battle, my heart refused to calm down, still pounding away anxiously in my chest. Peter was safe, clutched protectively in Iron Man’s arms, but the way his arms rested limply against his stomach did not fill me with confidence.

I squeezed my eyes tightly shut, my words coming out as barely a whisper. “We’re safe. It’s over. We’re safe…”

Breathe in, two, three, four.

Breathe out, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

Chapter Text

I sobbed quietly into May’s shirt, the fabric already uncomfortably wet from my tears. She gently stroked my hair, muttering calming and reassuring words. The adrenaline had finally worn off and I was left to face the reality of what had just happened. The dull throbbing in my shoulder (a vast improvement from the stabbing pain it had been earlier) was even more of a reminder.

* * * * * * * *

Me: The sling is kind of annoying, but I’m getting used to it. It’s been so freaking long since I last had to use one lol. But yeah, thanks to the note from Dr Jacobs, I get a couple days off work and then I’m only going to be on light duty. So it’s going to be a lot of register duty I think. Oooh I can get Evan to be at my beck and call, play the whole injured card… Oh no wait, I told him we were square for those concert tickets, darn! XD

Me: Oh also! I’m gonna come see you tomorrow before my shifts start up again. Hopefully you’ll be awake this time! I love you <3

* * * * * * * *

“A coma?”

“A medically induced coma,” Dr Jacobs said, the slightest frown pulling down the corners of his mouth. “He… I have to be blunt with you. His injuries are quite excessive. If he wasn’t Spider-Man, I’m not sure he would have survived. With that said, we’re hoping that we will be able to isolate and then neutralise whatever is in his system. With Peter asleep, the process will be easier for him… mentally and physically.”

May frowned as well, the expression much more pronounced on his face. “You hope?”

Tony sighed. “‘Hope’ is really the only word for it, May. There haven’t exactly been any cases like this before. We’re doing this totally blind.”

I bit my lip. So far beyond exhausted, mentally and physically, I didn’t know how much more I could handle. “Do you know how long he’ll be out? I know that’s a dumb question since you just said that this kind of thing has never happened before so how would you know how long-”

Tony reached out and placed it on my shoulder, the gentle squeeze of his fingers causing my rambling words to die in my throat. “It’s okay kiddo, just breathe.” He smiled softly, pausing as he watched me take a few deep, slow breaths in and out, before he let his arm drop back to his side. Though his smile fell just as quickly as he went on. “Unfortunately you are correct. My guess would be that it’ll take us a couple days, maybe a week, but I can’t even say that it’s an educated guess. I can’t stand guessing for this kind of thing, but we seriously don’t have a choice here.”

I nodded slowly. The potential for failure was far greater than I would have liked, but there was literally nothing I could do to change that. All I could do was stay out of their way and let them do what they could to help him. One question rose up in my throat and I couldn’t stop myself from voicing it. So in a small and trembling voice, I asked, “Will he be okay, Tony?”

Tony’s mask slipped, only for a split second, but in that moment I saw his worry, his concern for the boy who had become his son in all but name. But that moment passed just as quickly as it had come and Tony’s mask was back in place. “Pete’s a lot stronger than any of us know. I’m sure he’s gonna pull through this just fine.”

I was sure that his words were true, since I knew that Peter was incredibly strong, both physically and mentally. No one could deny that. Yet at that moment, I wasn’t sure if Tony’s words were purely to reassure and convince me or if he was trying to reassure himself.

* * * * * * * *

Me: Hey Pete <3 I know you’re not awake right now, but I wanted to text you so you could see this when you wake up, to hopefully make you smile! Peter, I just want you to know how much I love you. You are so brave and amazing and I’m so proud of you. I know you probably hear this all the time, but you’re my hero! <3

* * * * * * * *

I rapped my knuckles against the wooden door, the dull thuds echoing down the hallway. The motion shifted the bag perched on my shoulder and the strap slid down, threatening to fall off. Awkwardly, I caught the strap, just as it made an attempt at freedom, and winced as my right shoulder protested at the movement. There was the muffled sound of approaching footsteps and then the door swung open, revealing May’s gentle, smiling face. 

“(Y/N), honey, it’s so good to see you!” 

She wrapped me in a hug, avoiding my right side as much as possible. I couldn’t help the quiet sigh that escaped me when she enveloped me in her arms. May just exuded warmth, comfort and love, and it was just so calming and reassuring to be back in her presence. She kept her arms encircled around me for a few more seconds before pulling back and offering me a smile.

“Well,” she said, clapping her hands. “Let’s not spend the entire evening out in the hallway. Why don’t you come on in, honey?”

May stepped to the side, one hand resting gently on my back and the other gesturing to the open doorway. As I stepped over the threshold, I was hit once more with the thought that this was not how I imagined the situation playing out the first time. I never expected to meet May while tied to a chair, kidnapped by a caped metal madman. And I never expected to visit May’s apartment for the first time without Peter, especially not with Peter in a coma. Maybe this would be a running trend. Maybe our wedding would get crashed by some sort of supervillain?

Oh wow… possibly thinking a little bit too far ahead…

The apartment opened up right into a small, cute and cosy kitchen and living room area. Light brown floorboards, ever so slightly scuffed from years of shifting furniture and Peter’s childhood antics, creaked quietly as I stepped inside. A few bowls and cooking utensils covered the laminate countertops, as though May had tried to tidy up a bit before I’d arrived.

The pale cream walls were covered with photos and cherished memories. A young Peter with his face lit up in a massive smile, a science trophy in his hands, May and a smiling dark-haired man (most likely Ben) standing on either side of him. A collection of pictures of Ben and May’s wedding day: the two of them lost in each other's eyes, with their close family and friends, their hands clasped together as they stood at the altar. A candid moment with Ben and May as well as another couple, laughing together. The family resemblance between the two men led me to believe that the couple in the picture was Peter’s parents, Richard and Mary Parker. A bit further down the wall was a more recent photo with Peter and Tony, the pair of them smiling widely and holding an upside certificate from his internship with Stark Industries. 

Seeing the picture of Peter made me smile, but it also sent a wave of anxiety and worry through me. May softly closed the front door and came up behind me.

“That’s one of my favourites,” she sighed, the fondness very clear in her voice. “The pair of them just look so happy. They had way too much fun taking those pictures, it was so obvious to everyone in the room that Peter was more than just an intern to Tony.”

I nodded. That had been obvious to me as well, as soon as I’d seen the two of them interact. “He cares a lot about Pete…”

“Peter’s in good hands with him. He’ll be okay.” May put a comforting hand on my good shoulder, squeezing gently. I wasn’t surprised she’d worked out my thought process, it wasn’t exactly like it had been a hard one to follow after all.

“Shouldn’t he have…” I paused, taking a deep breath. “I don’t know… woken up or something by now?”

She hesitated for a split second and I knew she’d been thinking the same thing. “I know you’re worried, sweetheart, but it’s only been five days since the attack. Right now, he just needs to rest and recover. He’ll wake up when he’s ready. Tomorrow, we can go see him if you’d like?”

One of the pots on the stove started bubbling, the lid clattering loudly against the base. May jumped and dashed into the kitchen, lifting and angling the lid away from her to let the steam escape before stirring the contents inside.

“I’d almost completely forgotten the whole reason I invited you over!” May laughed. “Don’t want to mess up our second first impression. And my world-famous spaghetti is sure to make this a memorable event.”

“I still don’t think that’s a thing,” I smiled, moving away from the wall of photos to place my bag on a clear spot on the counter. Gently, I stretched out my arm, ignoring the familiar twinge of pain. 

Without looking at me, she waved her hand, dismissively. “Oh, it’s absolutely a thing. Our first meeting can hardly be considered a real first impression. I’m not letting a supervillain attack take that from us.”

“You are being remarkably casual about getting kidnapped by Doom… I’m still trying to come to terms with the whole thing. Has this happened to you before?”

May turned her head slightly and I could see the smile on her face. It wasn’t a happy smile, more small and sad looking. She shook her head, stirring dinner slowly with a wooden spoon. “No… it hadn’t happened to me before now, but I was thoroughly warned and… I suppose prepped for it. By Tony, of course. It was always going to be a possibility. Doesn’t matter that Peter has been able to keep his identity as Spider-Man a secret for the most part. If people are determined enough and have the resources for it, people can learn pretty much anything they want.” She laughed. “Hell, that’s how Tony found out Peter’s identity, same with his friend MJ. And I have no doubt the same thing happened with Doom.”

I frowned, still somewhat shocked by her seemingly cavalier attitude in regard to the whole ordeal. “And that didn’t bother you? I mean… we came incredibly close to dying. Like, sure we both got out of it with minimal injuries, but Peter didn’t. One wrong move, if he’d missed one of us, if Doom had attacked again, we could very easily have been killed.”

May was quiet for a while, but it didn’t feel like she was ignoring the question. She stirred once more, then opened the cabinet to her left, pulling out two ceramic bowls. I stepped into the kitchen, going to help her, but she just smiled at me and said, “I’ve got it, honey. Go take a seat at the table and I’ll bring these over”.

I sunk down into a worn cushioned chair at the small wooden table, cutlery and cute decorative placemats already laid out on its surface. May finished scooping the spaghetti into the bowls and carefully brought them over, setting one gently down in front of me. I thanked her and she smiled once more. 

She took the seat to the left of me, at the end of the table. Steam rose from the delicious-looking dinner and I couldn’t wait to dig in. Before I could reach for a fork, however, May broke the silence, her voice more serious than I’d ever heard from her before.

“You’re right. What happened to us was extremely dangerous and we were lucky to get through it alive. I am very sorry if it feels like I’ve been pretty laid back about it and like I was not taking the situation seriously. I’ve had years to get used to the danger and the risks, while you’ve only had a few months.
“And I can’t imagine how it must have felt to finally find your soulmate, only to have your life threatened for that bond. You didn’t ask for that. But Peter didn’t ask for it either.” May paused and looked down, her eyes passing over the fading brown-purple bruises scattered across her skin. She took a deep breath and then looked at me again, her eyes sad. “You have found yourself in a very difficult spot, I’m afraid, honey. And the question you’re going to have to ask yourself is whether this is going to be a situation you can mentally, physically and emotionally deal with. You two love each other; anyone can see that. But with Peter’s job as Spider-Man… no, it’s more than that. Spider-Man is who Peter is . With that fact though, his life could be at risk and so could yours. Saying that that’s not something you could handle is completely understandable and I wouldn’t blame you in the slightest for feeling that way.

“This is an incredibly difficult decision and it’s not one you have to make right now, but you need to ask yourself whether this relationship and your soulmate bond are worth facing these dangers. And I know I’m Peter’s aunt, but I don’t want you to feel like I’m pushing you towards one choice or the other. I genuinely just want you to be happy. I want Peter to be happy as well, of course, but… he won’t be happy if you aren’t.”

And then it was my turn to be silent. I hadn’t been expecting such a serious speech from May, but our conversation hadn’t exactly been lighthearted. She waited patiently while I worked through my thoughts, my mind running through the last few months I’d had with Peter. That first realisation that he was my soulmate, that I’d only realised the moment had happened after the fact. How sweet and kind he was when I finally managed to speak to him. Those incredible moments when he would show how his trust and comfort with me was growing, revealing his name and then his face (even if I’d already seen it when he was playing ‘Ben’). Each and every kiss we’d shared, the feeling of his arms around me, the sound of his voice as he told me he loved me...

And I knew what I was going to do.

“The idea of walking away from Peter, from the man I love, terrifies me more than any supervillain ever could. You’re right, I didn’t ask for this. I expected my soulmate to be… I guess boring would be the most fitting word to be honest. But instead, I got Peter. I got a superhero for a soulmate. And he is more wonderful and more amazing than I could have ever imagined my soulmate to be. 

“I can’t imagine my life without Peter in it now and I honestly don’t want to. I know that sounds a little ridiculous because it’s only been a few months, but it feels like so much more. I feel like I’ve known him my entire life. I love him. I love him with all my heart and all my soul and every little part of me that makes me who I am. To walk away from him… I’d be hurting myself just as much as it would hurt him, and I just can’t do that.

“Yes, it’s dangerous. I definitely understand that now, but I want to be there for him, to support him. To give him a reason to smile and make him laugh when things get hard, to comfort him when he needs it. And I know that he will do the same for me. Because he’s my partner. Because he loves me just as much as I love him.”

May’s smile grew bigger and bigger as I spoke, the hint of tears sparkling in her eyes. She took a deep breath in, and then let it out slowly. Her voice came out slightly shaky. “That makes me very happy to hear. I would have accepted your answer no matter what it was, but that was the one I was hoping for.” She cleared her throat, then laughed. “Okay, we’d better get started on eating before our food gets any colder.”

I laughed with her and that was the end of serious conversations for the evening.

* * * * * * * *

Tony: Got an update for you, kiddo

My heart instantly started beating faster. The message had been sent about an hour before, but I’d only just now had a chance to check my phone. Work had been crazy hectic; we’d just launched a new line of coffee that people were going nuts for apparently. Though I was only on light duties, my co-workers were often overrun by the unusual amount of people flocking to the store. I tried to help out as much as I could, possibly doing more than Dr Jacobs had advised, but my sling restricted me from doing too much. The one attempt I had made at making coffee had gone… not well. Thank god it had been iced coffee. Evan had been very upset with me for that one. 

Me: Sorry, just now on break at work. What’s the update?

Anxiously, I waited for his reply. The seconds ticked by agonisingly slowly, but finally, his message popped up.

Tony: Well, I suppose I’ll start with the good news. Peter is awake 🎉🎉🎉 Took longer than I would have liked, but Dr Jacobs and I have managed to isolate the toxins in Pete’s body and he’s healing.

My breath came out in a shaky gasp, his words slowly sinking in. Peter’s awake!! He’s not healthy, not yet, but he’s awake. Maybe I could go to the Tower after my shift and see him! It was only when my phone pinged again that I realised Tony had only given me half of his news.

Tony: And now for the not so good news. I know you’re likely already planning to come see him, but I’m gonna have to be a bit of a prick here. Peter is still recovering and has a long way to go. He’s not up to visitors just yet. Unfortunately, you’re gonna have to wait a little longer to see him. 

Tony: You can still call him, of course. I think even I’d be too scared to keep you from that

Biting my lip, I quickly typed out a reply to thank him for the update. The visitation restriction did make sense as much as I hated it. Having me there might be too overwhelming for him especially after just waking up from a two week long coma and dealing with still healing injuries.

Still… knowing he was awake and not being able to see him was torture. As sad as it sounded, this was the longest I’d gone without seeing Peter, let alone without even speaking to him. I wanted nothing more than to drive as fast as my car could go, sprint up the stairs of the Tower (the elevator would take too long), and throw open the doors of his medbay room. I wanted to throw myself into his arms, to hear his heartbeat, to hear his voice, and see his handsome face. 

As much as I would have loved to call Peter right then and there, my break was almost up and I had to throw myself back into the chaos. I carefully stretched and rolled my shoulder. Still a slight ache, but much better than it had been. Slipping my phone back into my back, I stood up and carefully stretched my shoulder. There was still a slight ache, but much better than it had been.

Evan smiled at me when I came back out to the counter. I smiled back, then internally winced as I saw the line-up of customers waiting to order or waiting for their drinks. Only a few more hours and then I could call Peter!

* * * * * * * *

“Hey, this is Peter! I can’t come to the phone right now, so leave a message.”

“Hey Peter. Tony tells me you’re on ‘no visitation’ recovery time for a while. You must be bored out of your mind! Crossing fingers you make it through this with your sanity intact! I miss you so much, I can’t wait til I can come see you. Gonna give you the biggest hug! So anyway, give me a call when you can. I love you!”

* * * * * * * *

“Hey, this is Peter! I can’t come to the phone right now, so leave a message.”

“Hi Peter! Umm… Guess I’ve caught you napping again. I hope your recovery is going well! I know this has to be tough for you. All that energy you have and you’re stuck in the medbay to recover. As much as I’m sure it sucks now, I know you’ll be out swinging around the city keeping the peace in no time. 

* * * * * * * *

“Hey, this is Peter! I can’t come to the phone right now, so leave a message.”

“Hey Pete! It’s just me again. Just uhh… give me a call back when you get this. I love you… bye.”

* * * * * * * *

A week. Seven whole days and not once had he called me back or even texted me. A freaking week and he couldn’t call me back once. Like… he’s recovering and he’s probably exhausted, but not even a text message to let me know he’s okay? And the text conversation I’d had with May earlier hadn’t helped anything. Apparently Peter could send a text to his aunt, just not to his soulmate.

I paced around my room, glancing at my phone, hoping each notification sound was going to be my boyfriend calling me back finally. I buried my face in my hands, my words coming out muffled as I groaned, “God, I sound pathetic.”

I felt like an anxious teenager, like I was tearing petals off a flower, saying “he loves me, he loves me not”. Of course, I wasn’t questioning whether he loved me or not, but… well he had just been seriously injured because of me. No, it wasn’t because of me. It was because of Doom. And it very easily could have been me that Peter had gotten to safety, and May that he’d plummeted after and injured himself to rescue.

But it hadn't been May. It had been me.

My stomach twisted in tight knots. All of a sudden, my room felt too small, too cramped, the walls closing in on me. The picture on my bedside table of Peter with his arm wrapped around my shoulders, identical joyous smiles on our faces, felt now like it was taunting me. I darted out of the room, feeling tears well up in my eyes. Frustrated, I blinked them away and tried to calm my racing heart, to get rid of the sudden weight I felt on my chest.

Gradually, very gradually, the feelings of panic started to ease, though they didn’t fade entirely to my dismay. The sound of the familiar upbeat chime of my ringtone had my heart pounding again though, and I practically sprinted to my room to check the notification.

Emily: Guess who is feeling too lazy to cook! Pizza delivery on its way! Please remember to tip your delivery person

Emily: Aka me ;D

Not who I’d been hoping for, but Emily never failed to put a smile on my face. Even though she didn’t know the whole truth, she had been my rock through my recovery. No matter what request I had for her, no matter how annoying I had to have been, she never once complained. Okay… that wasn’t entirely true. She complained a lot, but I knew she wasn’t serious. I mean, the girl even made me a batch of her world-famous cookies to make me feel better.

I slumped down on the couch, wincing a bit as the movement jostled my shoulder, and stared out the window, waiting for Emily to get home. About ten minutes later, there was a thumping on the door. Not quite a knock, a deeper sound than that. I pushed myself to my feet and strolled over, pulling open the door. The hinges squeaked every so slightly as it moved.

Emily definitely had her hands full with two pizza boxes and what looked like garlic bread wrapped with foil perched on top. Which explained the odd way she was standing, leaning back and balancing on her right leg to kick at the door with her left. She grinned at me. “I accept cash, cheques or any form of internet transactions for my tips.”

“Hmm… I can’t remember ordering pizza.” I twisted my face up in pretend confusion, slowly starting to close the door. The hinges protested even louder at this slow movement. “You must have the wrong address.”

She chuckled, but kicked at the door again. “Yeah yeah, let me in already. These boxes are hot.”

Stepping back from the doorway, I let her move past me and I followed her into our small kitchen. “So what do we need two pizzas and garlic bread for? Are we having a party or something?”

Emily sighed and shook her head, her bun flopping messily on her head. “Do you have no forward thinking? You’ll be thanking me tomorrow night when there is more pizza in the fridge rather than us eating all this tonight and being heartbroken that there is none left over!”

“Or we could just not eat an entire pizza and garlic bread between the two of us and have some of that for leftovers? I suggested, attempting to look serious.

Her jaw dropped. “I don’t even know you anymore! Who are you and what have you done to my roommate?!”

I poked my tongue out at her. I’d have to tell Peter about this; he always loved hearing my stories about Emily.

Oh…

My ever-observant roommate raised an eyebrow as my smile vanished from my face, her dark brown eyes seeming to stare into my soul. She opened up the box, our noses immediately met with the delicious scent of freshly cooked pizza, and grabbed a slice absolutely covered in pepperoni. She held it out for me and said, “Okay, you are going to eat this and tell me what’s going on in that lovely head of yours.” 

I tried to put on a smile, chuckling half-heartedly. “What do you m-?” Em raised her eyebrow and that was all it took for me to drop my attempt. My shoulders slumped and I took the pizza from her, taking a bite from it with a mumbled, “...okay.”

Though I knew she wouldn’t let me delay forever, she let me chew for a minute or so, nibbling at her own slice. The foil surrounding the garlic bread was tugged apart and I watched the steam slowly rise before disappearing. I’d had a couple (absolutely delicious) bites before I sighed.

“So… you know how I told you Pete and I were in a car accident?” At the time, it had seemed like a reasonable enough excuse for my injury and my obvious concern for him. She had been lovely enough to not poke and prod for details, accepting my vague answers. But now it was going to be harder to get into details without giving everything away.

Emily gave an exaggerated nod and through a mouthful of pizza, she replied, “Yep, that’s what you said.”

“Well I said that Peter was hurt, but I didn’t say how bad. The doctor put him in an induced coma and he only woke up about a week ago.”

Her eyes widened. “Okay yeah, definitely worse than you said. No wonder you were so worried. It must have been a really bad accident, huh?”

I looked down at my pizza again, my brain bringing back up the memory of falling and May’s screams and Peter’s pained whimpers. To avoid answering her, I took another bite.

We sat in silence for a few moments, before Em spoke up again, her voice nonchalant. “I thought Peter didn’t have a car.”

Ahhh. Shit. “Oh uhh… he doesn’t. He was borrowing his Aunt’s car.”

“Hmm.”

This was… definitely not usual behaviour from Em. I’d been expecting a lot more curiosity. But right now she seemed more interested in the garlic bread she was gently tearing apart.

She popped a small chunk of bread into her mouth and chewed it for a few seconds. “Yeah, wouldn’t really make sense for Spider-Man to need a car, I suppose.”

Everything stopped. My heart stopped, my breathing stopped. Record scratch, freeze frame. All the clichés all at once. What did she just say?! She couldn’t know. Doom already knew Peter’s identity and that was more than enough. It would only get worse if more people knew about Peter being Spider-Man. And if it was my fault that more people knew about it?

He’d never forgive me.

Deny. Have to deny it. Deflect, change the subject, literally anything.

I forced out a laugh. “Peter? Spider-Man?! That’s… that’s crazy. How do you even come up with this stuff? Like honestly, that is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. Peter is just… I mean, he…”

Emily watched my ramblings with silent amusement. If her eyes could twinkle, I was sure they’d be twinkling bright enough to light the night sky. She was clearly enjoying my suffering. Was there any point in going on with these denials? She knew. She knew my soulmate’s biggest secret. The only secret I was supposed to keep, to protect Peter’s identity. And in only a few months, the truth was out. And if Emily knew, who knows how many other people knew?

My stuttered denials died in my throat, defeated and panicked tears pricking at my eyes. If he didn’t hate me already, he definitely would now.

Shoulders slumped, I mumbled a question. “How did you find out?” 

Emily shrugged. “The same way that anybody finds out information these days. Online, of course. There’s a super shaky cam video going around of Spider-Man trying to save this falling girl who bears an uncanny resemblance to a certain roommate of mine. Jazzy came across it a day or two ago and showed it to me.”

“There’s a video?!” I buried my face in my hands. Yep. There was no fixing this. 

“Honey, it’s okay!” She pushed the cardboard box aside and patted my head. “The quality of the video is absolutely terrible. It’s only because we’ve known each other for so long that I recognised it was you.”

“Thanks for the attempt, but still not super reassuring.” My head shook from side to side as I spoke, my fingers tightening in my hair. There was no way this was happening. It just couldn’t be... This was a dream, some goddamn nightmare out of the worst part of my brain. “You know, Jazzy knows. Other people are going to figure out it’s me and then they’ll put two and two together and figure out who he is and he’ll never forgive me! I’ve ruined his fucking life and he is going to hate me, even though I’m pretty sure he already fucking does!”

Air. I needed air. Where the hell had all the air gone?! There was none in my lungs, my chest heaving as I desperately fought for breath. My rapid panting gasps echoed in my ears. My hands gripped my hair like a lifeline. Tears streamed down my cheeks and my heart started pounding, the spikes of pain lining up perfectly with each beat of my heart. 

“Oh god, I’m so sorry!” Emily quickly moved around the counter, sliding over to be next to me, close enough to be comforting but not quite touching me. “I was trying to be like… playful with this. I knew it was a big deal, secret identities and superheroes and all that, but I didn’t know you were this stressed about everything and that things were this bad. But ahh, okay we can talk about that after…”

She took a deep breath to steady herself. “Okay love, I know it’s hard, but you’re gonna get through this. I need you to breathe with me.”

There was a deep, exaggerated breath next to me. A few seconds later, I felt the cool hit of her exhale on my skin. Breathing… yes, I could do that. But how? It was like I couldn’t remember how to breathe! All I could think about was Peter and Doom and everyone finding out and him hating-

Emily’s voice, slow and much calmer than before, cut through my frantic thoughts.”I believe in you. C’mon, I know you can do it. With me now.”

She breathed in. I did my best to imitate her, managing a small and shaky breath. We held that breath for a few seconds and then released it, Emily holding hers for a couple seconds longer than I could. 

“Good, honey! That was so good! Let’s do another, okay?”

The air flowed into my lungs again, getting more air with each breath and holding it for longer each time. Over the course of several minutes, she and I gradually worked on calming me down. I drowned out the anxious persistent voice in my head with that same mantra I had chanted on the flight back to the Tower after the Doom attack.

Breathe in, two, three, four.

Breathe out, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

Once I was through the worst of the attack and she saw that I was calming down, my wonderful roommate put her hand on my back. She left it resting there for a little while, and then, with long and gentle motions, she rubbed my back. Her nails scratched against the fabric of my shirt with every downstroke, raising pleasant goosebumps on my skin.

This was far from the first time she had talked me down from a panic attack, though this was the first in quite a long time. I didn’t trust my voice to be steady quite yet, so I reached for a chunk of garlic bread and absently chewed on it.

Em relaxed and leaned back against the counter, though her eyebrows remained furrowed. “I really am sorry,” she said, her voice much less confident than it had been before. I knew she was telling the truth; she was practically radiating guilt. “I thought it would be a fun little joke that I’d figured it out. I guess I never realised how serious this actually is.”

I nodded, my lips pulling down at the corners. “Yeah… it’s definitely serious. I mean yeah, there’s some superheroes like Tony and Colonel Rhodes” - her eyes widened at my casual use of Tony’s name and I just knew I would be bombarded with even more questions later - “who are totally fine with their ‘secret’ identities being public knowledge. Peter though, his privacy means a lot to him. It means that he and his aunt can still live normal lives. And now… well now I guess that’s gone.”

“Well hey.” Emily’s reassuring voice was back, but there was a tiny shake to it now. “I really did mean it earlier. The video quality they got of you guys was seriously terrible. Like filmed on a shitty broken flip phone kind of bad.”

I chuckled weakly. “Again, thanks for the attempt, but not that comforting. People will find out. It’s only a matter of time with me in the picture I guess.”

“Wait, what? You… you said Peter hated you earlier…” Em’s whole face darkened. In her eyes, I could see her opinion of Peter dropping rapidly by the second. “He’s not actually blaming you for this, is he?”

With a shrug, I mumbled, “I guess? I haven’t heard from him since it happened. Not counting the time he spent unconscious, of course. And I know he’s been talking to May, or texting her at least. I guess I can’t really blame him for hating me. After what happened, I think I’d hate me too…”

Em stiffened her shoulders, fire in her eyes. “This isn’t- ”

“How can it not be?!” My voice came out louder than I’d meant it to, cracking pathetically at the end of my sentence. I’d been burying these emotions, marinating in my hurt and guilt and fear, and now it was all once more rushing to the surface. “Peter and May seemed to have no problem keeping his identity a secret for years. And I’m in his life for less than a year and already he’s really badly injured and there’s footage that will no doubt reveal Peter to the masses. So of course this is my fault!”

“And maybe his identity would have come out anyway! Some bad guy could have pulled his mask off or followed him home or any number of things and figured out who he is.” Her voice rose higher to match my intensity. “And his identity isn’t even revealed yet. It’s just me and Jazzy that know! Don’t make me do the breathing thing to calm you down again because so help me, I will.”

I deflated, pulling anxiously at my clothes. A loose thread poked out from under my shirt and with trembling fingers, I tugged at it. She was right and wrong at the same time. I couldn’t deny that there was always the chance that Spider-Man could have been unmasked, with or without my involvement. But I had been involved, and I couldn’t get that thought out of my head.

But her saying that only she and Jasmine were the only ones who knew just couldn’t be true. Any of my co-workers or even regular customers could see that footage and recognise me in it. Plus Peter has been to the coffee shop so many times to see me at work, so it wouldn't take too much brain power to put the pieces together. 

“Let’s look at it from another angle,” Em said, startling me from my frettings. “Have you considered that it’s not that Peter is blaming you , but that he’s blaming himself?”

“Blaming himself?” I blinked at her. To be honest, the thought really hadn’t occurred to me.

Emily tilted her head, her eyes softening. “Oh, honey. Surely you’ve considered another possibility than just that he now hates you and blames you for the incident.”

When I didn’t reply, she sighed. She reached a hand over the counter and placed it over mine, squeezing gently. “This one is over my pay grade, I’m afraid. I am definitely not qualified to help with the whole ‘superhero guilt’ side of things. A guilt that you and Peter seem to share apparently. Look, do you know where Peter is? Is he with his aunt now?”

I shrugged, biting my lip. “He was at Stark Tower to recover, so that both Tony and the doctor could monitor him. My guess is that he would still be there, but he could have left I suppose.”

The sparkle of curiosity shone brightly through her eyes again. “Okay… so why don’t you just go there? Is that a thing you can do, just… go to Stark Tower? You need to talk to him, for both of your sakes. And mine at this point. Probably May and ‘Tony’ as well. If he’s not answering your texts or calls, you need to talk to him in person. And if he isn’t there or won’t talk to you for whatever reason, you can talk to ‘Tony’, maybe get some info from him about what’s going on with Peter.” Every mention of Tony’s name was paired with a raised eyebrow and finger quotes.

She was right. Of course she was. A conversation needed to happen, no matter what the outcome of it would be. I couldn’t keep going with all these unanswered questions swirling through my head. “You have a point. I’m not back at work quite yet, so I might as well get it over with by going tomorrow. Putting it off longer will only make things worse.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Em said with a nod. Then she clapped her hands together and grinned, the unexpected sound making me jump. “Now! Time for us to eat some more pizza while you , little Miss Secrets, tell me about how you kept this newfound friendship with Tony freaking Stark and trips to Stark Tower a secret from oyur best friend! It’s unforgivable. Betrayal of the highest order!”

I couldn’t help but laugh. The girl might be crazy, but she sure knew how to make me feel better. She and I split the last slice and we settled on the couch, as I prepared myself for what was undoubtedly going to be a very long conversation.

Chapter Text

If I don’t open my eyes, it’s not tomorrow yet. Or… I guess it would be today? No! It’s not today. Because I haven’t opened my eyes yet. It’s still the middle of the night and I can go back to sleep. I don’t have to deal with anything for hours yet. 

Except… it’s not the middle of the night. It’s officially tomorrow… Or today? Oh whatever. 

It meant that I had to go talk to Peter, to try and sort this whole thing out. Even if he didn’t want to see me or speak to me, I at least had to try. God, it shouldn’t be this hard. Was I doing something wrong? Was I just not great at this whole soulmate thing? Talking to your soulmate should feel natural, as easy as breathing. Or at least that’s what I thought. That’s what I’d been led to believe. All the stories I’ve heard make it seem like things should just be perfect. Like that we’d be able to work out any small, inconsequential issues we had so quickly and easily and get back to an uncomplicated love story.

But Peter and my story was complicated. It felt easy and natural at times, but right now it felt so hard. With all my heart, I longed to go back to that picnic in the park or to eating Emily’s delicious cookies together. Hearing him laugh at one of my jokes, seeing his beautiful face lit up in a smile, feeling his arms around me as we relaxed on the couch… These were moments I would never be able to get enough of, and ones that I needed to experience again as soon as possible. But in order to experience them again, I needed to talk to him.

And if I lingered in bed any longer, Em would likely come in with another pep talk slash shoulder to cry on type speech. It was kind of ridiculous how good she was at those. It was no surprise to me really though. All the times I’d seen her talk Jazzy through her anxiety attacks. Honestly Emily should look into pursuing a career in therapy or something like that; she’d be fantastic at it. Then again, she was really more of a talkative and confident person around people she was familiar with, not really strangers. Still, it might be an idea to bring it up with her, see if it would be something she’d be interested in. Maybe she hadn’t even thought of it as a possibility.

Aaaaand… I was procrastinating. Guess it was time to finally get up. The day wouldn’t seize itself! Oh god, what did that even mean? Where did that even come from?

Yeah, definitely way past time to get up.

Finally acknowledging that morning had arrived, I opened my eyes and blinked away the tiredness. There was a quiet crack as I stretched my arms out, a satisfying aching kind of pain accompanying it. With a muted groan of resignation, I pushed myself up and dragged myself out of bed.

Oh, but there was just so much to be done. Clothes strewn across the room that simply had to be dealt with now. Making a few trips, taking only a few pieces at a time - my arm was still injured, I wouldn’t want to hurt it by holding too heavy of a load - I moved them into the bathroom to toss them into the laundry hamper. And of course, the trash had to be taken out, in my room and the kitchen too. It was still a day or two away from when we’d normally take care of it, but there was no better time like the present! Dishes in the sink - only two, but much better to get them out of the way now. Mail to be collected - who knows, there could be a super important letter in there! Ahh, and that was the beep of the dryer finishing up -  wouldn’t it be nice if Em came home and found her clothes already folded for her. 

The sound of the door creaking open was lost under the almost deafening sound of me vacuuming the living room. Moving slowly, I pushed the vacuum back and forth along the beige carpet rug, though some areas were looking a bit more discoloured than others. Maybe it was due for a shampoo and a thorough wash? We probably still had some carpet cleaner somewhere in the apartment, probably in the bathroom. A grating sound caught my attention. The vacuum had probably sucked something up that it shouldn’t have, like a bobby pin or a hair tie or something like that. I pressed the off switch and bent down to investigate.

“What do you think you’re doing?”

“Holy shit, Em!” Jerking my head around, I saw her leaning on the wall next to the doorway, looking at me with fond exasperation. At least I hoped it was still fond, it could very well just be plain exasperation at this point. I put a hand on my chest, feeling my heart thumping wildly. “You scared the crap out of me!”

“Ah, so sorry about that. You just seemed so focused. I didn’t want to disturb you.” She grinned. “Speaking of which… what’s up? You didn’t say we were doing all the cleaning today. I would have helped if I knew.”

With an attempt at nonchalance, I shrugged. “Oh, you know, I just woke up in a productive mood, I guess. And since they’re so few and far between, I figured I’d make the most of it! Get some pressing chores around the apartment done.”

“Uh huh,” she nodded. “Pressing chores like you folding my laundry?”

“I’m just trying to help you out! You’re such a great roommate after all.”

“And none of this has anything to do with a certain conversation you’re supposed to be having with-”

“Oh look at that! Some dirt I missed!” I clicked the vacuum on and pushed it towards a nonexistent dirty spot. A few seconds passed, the roar of the vacuum preventing any conversation, but I knew she wasn’t finished with me. This thought was emphasised as Em crossed her arms. With a sigh, I clicked it back off, the roar fading away to silence. “Okay… it might have everything to do with that.”

“Yeah, thought that might happen. Though I’m happy I don’t have to fold my clothes or vacuum, so thanks for that,” Emily said, a small smile on her face. “I get that you’re scared, but you can do this. I believe in you.”

“Thanks, Em…” I tried to smile back. “I guess I’d better just get this over with, huh?”

“Good idea. And I got you some fuel for the road as well.” She nodded towards the counter, where a takeaway coffee cup and a brown paper bag sat.

I rested the vacuum against the side of the couch. “You got me breakfast?”

“Yep! A hot chocolate and a croissant. Not the healthiest thing I know, but I figured-”

I cut her off once more, but this time it was by crossing the room and pulling her into the tightest hug. She let out a tiny “Aww” then wrapped her arms around me. Tears pricked at my eyes, but I blinked them away.

“I love you, you know that,” I mumbled, my face buried in the fabric on her shoulder.

“Of course I know and I love you too.” Emily’s voice trembled at the end and she squeezed me gently. Then she cleared her throat and took a step back from me. “Okay. You are going to go get dressed, not that you don’t look fabulous in your pyjamas of course, but maybe not really the vibe you want to go for right now. Get ready, grab your breakfast and get going! You have a soulmate to talk some sense into!”

“I still need to put away the vacuum, though.”

“And give you another chance to get in another ‘productive mood’. Hell no,” she laughed. “Now get going.”

* * * * * * * *

Whether it was a good thing or a bad thing, I was unsure, but somehow the drive to the Tower was remarkably short. Traffic that was normally packing the streets was flowing by quickly and orderly. I hadn’t thought that was even possible for New York City. It was almost as if the universe was telling me that I had put off having this conversation for long enough.

Scanning my pass, the bar smoothly lifted up, allowing me to head down into the underground parking lot. The first two levels were reserved for employees at Stark Tower. My pass, however, allowed me access to Tony’s private parking area, reserved for himself and his friends and family. It would never stop amazing me that I was now included in that category. Or well… at least a plus one to that category. The private parking lot was secured behind heavy duty metal gates that silently slid apart. It was definitely still strange to pull my most likely fourth or fifth hand car into an open space next to a very expensive looking Audi. The parking spaces were huge, but I took extra time, as I always did, just to ensure there was no possible chance of me bumping into it.

Only a handful of the spaces were taken up by cars, but some were labelled so I hadn’t wanted to take anyone else’s spot. Peter’s space was empty, but Colonel Rhodes’ space was occupied by a dark red SUV. Maybe he was visiting Tony?

Every step I took echoed around me in the open concrete space. The private parking lot shared the same elevators as the rest of the building, but the special pass allowed me access to some of the more exclusive parts of the Tower. After a few moments, the light above the door glowed and a cheerful “bing” accompanied the doors opening. I stepped inside and the doors shut behind me.

It was a smooth ride. Quiet, upbeat music filled the small box and I gazed around at my reflections in all the mirrors. Greyish-brown bags stood out from under my eyes in every version of me staring back. I shifted my gaze downwards, not wanting to meet my own eyes. A dull ache emanating throughout my shoulder reminded me that maybe I’d overdone it a bit this morning, with the drive here and the possibly unnecessary chores. Not that I’d ever tell Emily that; she’d never let me hear the end of it.

Thankfully, I didn’t have to wear the sling anymore, but since I had dislocated my shoulder, I was still pretty restricted. It would be probably another month or two until I could do things as I normally would. Damn human healing times. I doubt I’d be a very good Spider-Man… or Spider-Woman I guess would make more sense in my case, but god would it be nice to have super fast healing. Maybe overdoing it this morning hadn’t been such a good idea. It had worked excellently as a distraction at the time, but I was definitely regretting it now. 

The elevator came to a gentle stop multiple times, the doors opening up to reveal Stark employees coming to join me temporarily in the mirrored space as they headed to higher floors. Carrying clipboards or small handheld tablets, most paid me no mind, distracted by their tasks for the day or meetings they had to attend. Some gave me small nods or smiles as they stepped inside. I’d smile back, but part of me was just waiting, dreading the moment of “Hey, you’re the girl from that Doom attack video that’s going around!”

It never came though. Maybe they didn’t recognise me, maybe Emily was right. Or maybe Tony just paid them well enough to have discretion about certain things. I wasn’t sure, but it eased my worries just the slightest amount.

Finally, I was once again the only passenger in the elevator. It was getting closer and closer to the moment of truth, the moment I’d finally talk to Peter and get this whole thing settled… for better or for worse. And then, with that same “bing”, the doors slid open one last time and I stepped out.

The medbay was quiet, as it normally was. My shoes squeaked on the tile floors as I inched down the hall. There was no one in sight, but I didn’t make it too far out of the elevator before I heard voices, growing louder as they came closer.

“Honeybear, platypus, please?” 

Was that… Tony? Maybe he was talking to Pepper, though I couldn’t imagine those would be nicknames she’d go by. It just didn’t seem like it fit her. There was no reply to his words, so he went on. 

“Rhodey, c’mon man, you gotta help me,” Tony sighed. “I’m way too old to understand adolescent drama and dilemmas. Help me try to get through to him. Pete won’t even listen to me!”

Well that wasn’t too much of a shock, I’d known Rhodes was in the building. What cute nicknames Tony had for him though! However, hearing that Peter wasn’t listening to Tony was a concern. I had a pretty good idea of what Tony might be trying to talk to him about. Their footsteps stopped and I heard another sigh, though this one didn’t sound like it came from Tony.

“Tones… if you asked me to single handedly take on Doom, Loki, Ultron, whoever, I would charge into battle with a smile on my face and beat the smug smirks off their faces,” Rhodes chuckled. “I would do that any day over trying to get those kids to talk to each other. I do not have that kind of patience. They’ll work it out, just gotta give it some time.”

Tony, ever the flair for the dramatic, replied, “I’m hurt. I feel totally betrayed here. You are being a terrible co-parent.”

Rhodes laughed again, a deep quiet sound. “I have an appointment to get to. Good luck with the kiddos. Sit ‘em down, take away their allowance, ground them, whatever you gotta do. Be a good dad. You got this!”

His footsteps began again. For a second, I was worried he was headed straight towards me, but they grew quieter as he moved down another hallway.

“Don’t make me divorce you!” Tony called after him.

“Love you too man,” Rhodes called back.

Before I could wrap my head around the conversation, Tony appeared from around the corner, dressed casually in a dark long sleeved shirt and his hands tucked into the pockets of his jeans. There wasn’t even a hint of surprise on his face when he saw me awkwardly standing there in front of the elevator. “Ahh, there you are, kiddo.”

“M-Mr Stark! I didn’t… I mean, I wasn’t-”

“Eavesdropping? Lurking around the corner?” He raised an eyebrow at me, cutting through my rambling.

“Well… I didn’t mean to-”

He waved a hand at me. “I figured you’d show up sooner or later. To be honest, I expected you sooner. And anyway, I knew you were here. Friday ratted you out.” He held his smartwatch for me to see; a tiny animated hand was waving. “She says hi by the way. Can’t get anything past me, kiddo. You could have texted though, I would have had snacks prepared.”

I sighed. “Then I’m assuming you know why I’m here?”

Tony nodded. “Of course I do. And once more I get to be the bearer of bad news.”

It was odd. I could almost physically feel myself deflating as he spoke, all the courage and determination I’d been building rapidly leaving my body. “He’s not here, is he?” Tony shook his head, and I looked away from him. “So… he is avoiding me.”

“He’s a stubborn kid, that one. He gets that from me, of course,” Tony sighed. “Let’s move this conversation upstairs though. You look like you need to rest for a bit.”

“Yeah, that sounds good actually.”

We moved back over to the elevator, and he pressed the button to take us up. The scanner didn’t yell at him to scan his pass like it would for anyone else. Fingerprint recognition, or maybe facial recognition? Maybe the elevator just sensed Tony Stark’s presence. 

A short ride later and we entered the penthouse. He gestured towards the couch and I shuffled over, settling down gently on the dark leather. Though I’d seen it a few times now, the luxurious furnishings and the stunning view of the city usually never failed to take my breath away. I found that today, however, I was far more distracted by thoughts of Peter.

It hadn’t been very long, only mere days since I had been in the Tower last. I had sat by Peter’s side down in the medbay, watching his face for any signs of movement or discomfort he might have, but he had just been so… still. I was used to my high energy Peter, so this Peter had been a little scary to me. He honestly looked almost lifeless: his breathing shallow and his skin washed out, making the dark purple bruises covering his arms and the dark bags under his eyes look even more severe.

Had he known I was there with him? He had my messages to say I’d visited, but I couldn’t help but wonder if he’d been aware of my presence even while asleep. Was it a comfort? Or did he wake up to my messages saying I’d been there and been angry? If he wanted nothing to do with me now, I couldn’t imagine that would have been nice to wake up to.

I shook my head, trying to get rid of the frustratingly persistent pessimistic thoughts. There was no point in stressing out over it when it might not even be real. Instead, I focused on Tony. He had his back to me, reaching into a fridge behind the bar. When he turned back around, I saw that he had retrieved two water bottles. He came over to join me on the couch, reaching over to hand it to me before dropping down onto the couch with a quiet groan.

“Thanks,” I said, twisting the cap off to take a long sip.

He nodded, drinking from his bottle as well.

After an extended pause, I found I could wait no longer. “Is he… is he okay at least? I know you said he was awake, but I’ve just been really worried about him.”

Tony looked at me, his eyes softer than I’d ever seen them. “He’s okay,” he said quietly. “Physically at least. As soon as we got that weird ass chemical out of him, his healing kicked in almost immediately. We still made him wait a day or two, just to be sure it was all gone. But yeah, he’s been up and about for a few days now.”

I nodded, looking down at the bottle in my hands. The plastic had a layer of cool condensation clinging to it, and I traced along the ridges of the bottle, leaving clear paths through the liquid. “Well, that’s good to hear. And how has he been… aside from physically?”

Tony sighed and leant forward, the bottle dangling from his fingers. “Quiet. He’s been very quiet. He hasn’t been going out as Spider-Man. Recommended by me and Dr Jacobs, of course. He’s mostly just been here working on repairing and tweaking his suit. I’ve been helping him out here and there, but yeah, mostly just quiet.”

A bead of liquid slid down the side of the plastic, dripping down onto my ring finger and slowly drifting down until it fell silently to the floor. “And he’s been talking to May?” 

He didn’t answer for a few seconds. “Well… I wouldn’t say talking exactly. I can’t say for certain, but it might be possible that he’s texted her once or twice.”

He almost sounded like a politician. Though being in the public eye so much probably meant he had to talk like that, not confirming or denying anything. Giving just enough to make it seem like he’d answered the question. I needed something else, something to help me convince Peter. Or at least to give me a different perspective on the whole thing. 

And then… an idea popped into my head. “Tony, can I ask you a question?”

His head tilted to the side, his eyes searching mine, curiously. “Sure thing, kid. Shoot.”

Choosing my words carefully, unsure if it was a sensitive topic, I asked, “You and Pepper… Forgive me if this is inappropriate to ask, but… the two of you are soulmates, yes?”

Tony smiled, his gaze drifting away from me, not seeming to be looking at anything in particular. “Yes, we are. Never confirmed with the media, of course, but I’d say it’s a safe bet to think that everyone at least assumes we are. And now I’m assuming you’d like to hear our story?”

I answered his question, posed to me with a classic Stark raised eyebrow, with a simple nod. “If you wouldn’t mind, that is.”

He took another sip. Then he leant forward, the leather creaking quietly with his movement. His eyes hardened ever so slightly, looking at me with sudden intensity. It sunk in just a little bit more how intimidating Tony Stark could truly be. “Now I’m only telling you this because I know how much Pete means to you, and I’m hoping this will help. So no running off to the press with any of this. I have the best lawyers; I would sue the shit out of you and there is no chance in hell that you would come out on top in that fight.”

The warning was more than clear, but we both knew I wasn’t going to spread his story around. But just to appease him, I nodded my head again. “Of course. I have no intention of spreading gossip.”

“I know, just had to make sure.” He smiled again, face already softened back to the much preferred private Tony Stark appearance. He didn’t speak again for a few moments, perhaps thinking over his past with the beautiful and strong-willed Pepper Potts. “She was interviewing to be my personal assistant. She’d already gone through extensive background checks and interviews, and it was down to her and one other woman for the role. And the final interview was with me. I had to make sure I could tolerate her and that she wouldn’t run away from the job after a week. Not an easy job being my personal assistant. Just ask her, she has endless stories she could tell you, I’m sure.

“We both knew immediately. The second our greetings were out of the way. Her hand was still stretched out towards me, going to shake mine, and we just froze. Our words faded away to nothing and we just… looked at each other, completely dumbfounded.”

It didn’t even feel like he was telling the story to me anymore, just like he was telling himself, immersing himself once more into a moment that changed his life forever.

Then he laughed, a smooth and clear sound, making me jump a little at its suddenness. “Then we just went on with the interview! As if that interaction had never even happened. And she got the job. Not because she’s my soulmate. But because there was no one else more perfectly qualified for the role.

“And we continued like that for years. I was already Iron Man by the time we actually admitted we liked each other. And even then, Iron Man was a big reason why we split for a while. Not because she was worried for her safety, but because she was worried for mine. It all got to be a bit too much for her. I mean, it’s possible I was dying for a bit there, so it’s understandable. But she knew I couldn’t not be Iron Man though; people needed me and they still do. But I relied too much on it and so I needed to take a step back. Then we talked and now we’re in a good place. We need each other and we both know that.”

He trailed off, lost in thought once more. When he spoke again, his words were quieter, longer pauses between his sentences as if he was taking great care in his words. “Being a superhero and someone’s soulmate isn’t easy. And Peter is… he feels a lot, that kid. Can’t really say kid anymore I suppose, though. He feels like it’s his responsibility to keep everybody safe and if he can’t, he feels like he failed. And for that to happen to someone close to him, for that to happen to his last living relative and to his soulmate… I think it’s safe to say that he’s not handling it well.

“But I think that’s enough of the Tony monologues for today.” He clapped his hands together, the sound unexpectedly loud, catching me off guard once more as I was dragged out of the story. “You need to talk to Peter, get him out of his own head. He ducked off to the Compound a day or so ago, and Friday says he’s still there. So go talk to him, sort this out. There has been more than enough of the cliché romcom conflict. Now, how did you get here?”

Blinking my eyes a few times, taken aback by the sudden topic change, I replied, “I uhh… I drove here?”

“With that arm?” Tony sighed, shaking his head with what felt close to a parental kind of disapproval. “I won’t deny you’re recovering, but I think you’ve pushed it enough for one day. You’ll take one of my cars. I’ll get a driver to take you up there.”

I shook my head. “Mr St- Uhh… Tony, you really don’t have to! I mean, you’ve already done so-”

“Nope. Not having you hurt yourself again and sending Peter into another guilt spiral. None of us need that,” Tony said, waving his hand at me dismissively. “Besides, FRIDAY’s already sent the job out. The driver will be ready as soon as you get out of the elevator in the garage. Don’t worry about your car, it’ll be safer here than anywhere else.”

Further protests welled up within me, but knowing they were pointless, I just gave him a smile. “I… okay. Thank you, Tony. It really means a lot.”

“Peter’s a good kid. If anyone deserves happiness, it’s him.” He breathed in, long and deeply, then a tired looking smile brought one side of his mouth up. “Bring him home.”

* * * * * * * *

The car moved sleekly and almost silently through the busy city traffic. As soon as I’d stepped inside the dark sleek looking Audi, I felt uncomfortable. Not in a ‘oh god, what have I gotten myself into’ kind of way, but in more of a ‘this car costs more than I make in like 3 years worth of pay cheques’ kind of way. After investigating the interior, trying to avoid looking in the rear view mirror and catching the eye of the stoic driver, I found a small minibar filled to the brim with drinks. Even if I’d been incredibly dehydrated, the thought of spilling something onto the expensive looking seats filled me with dread, and I gingerly shut the door again.

Finally I managed to get settled, finding a comfortable spot with my head tilted outwards, watching the world outside with a somewhat distracted interest. Throughout the drive, the view through the heavily tinted windows gradually changed from the hectic concrete playground to a calmer scenic landscape, occasionally interrupted by small towns. The trees stood out, their leaves resembling a vast fire burning through the countryside, dark reds and oranges. The wind blew through the foliage, sending a soft cascade of leaves through the air.

My mind wandered, the quiet engine and smooth ride almost lulling me into a meditative state. My thoughts dragged me back to that first moment, those seemingly unimportant seconds that really did change my life forever. His light-hearted but sincere apology, the words falling so casually from his masked mouth as he resumed his continued efforts to protect the city from crime, to be the friendly neighbourhood Spider-Man. And that moment when I’d made it home, when I’d finally realised what had just happened.

Not in a million years, not in my wildest dreams would I have thought I would end up with someone as… interesting as Spider-Man for a soulmate. But Spider-Man wasn’t the relevant party involved. Sure it was exciting and definitely a little nerve-wracking, but what was underneath the mask mattered way more. 

Peter Parker, the man who seemed truly capable of charming anyone and everyone around him with his gorgeous smile and his absolutely adorable personality. So kind, so cheerful, so passionate, so innately loveable. Even putting aside the whole soulmate thing, it hadn’t been a matter of if I fell in love with him, it was when.

Our situation was far from normal. I mean, I’d fallen for him before even seeing his face. Just his voice and his personality were enough to make me fall so far. While my life before him had been fine and I definitely wouldn’t have said that I was unhappy, Peter just brought a… spark into my life. Introduced these pops of colour in places where previously had been grey. He just radiated sunshine and losing that glow was not an idea I wanted to think about.

And I was not going to let him walk away from this without so much as a conversation, just in the name of self-sacrifice or as a completely unnecessary and unwanted attempt to protect me. This relationship, this bond meant so much more than that, and deserved much more than that. We both knew it, he just needed a little reminding. 

And I was more than happy to give him that reminder.

* * * * * * * *

From between the tall trees, the Avengers Compound gradually came into view. Our car smoothly made its way along the curved driveway, my fingers clutching the arm rest as my heart beat a tiny bit faster than normal. The lush green landscaping and decorative trees created an interesting contrast to the futuristically militant building they surrounded. Maybe an attempt to make the place feel a little more homey? Peter had mentioned that a couple of the Avengers had called this place their home, at least at one point in time.

Finally, after what both felt like forever and way too soon, we finished our journey.

The driver set the car in park and then tilted his head up, his eyes meeting mine in the rearview mirror. "Mr Stark has asked me to stay in the area in case you require a ride home. You can contact his Al and it will get in touch with me."

"I... uhh, right," I said, giving him a nod. "Thank you."

He returned my nod and pushed open his door, strolling around the car to open my door as well. Not used to the chauffeur experience, I awkwardly hopped out of the car, brushing at my clothes with my hands, trying to make them appear a little more presentable. After one last check to make sure his job was, for the moment, completed, the driver hopped back in the car and drove further down the driveway and then out of sight, probably to park in some highly secure parking garage or something like that.

Okay… breathe… it’s gonna be fine.

I repeated the words as a mantra to myself, my eyes closed, letting my heartbeat calm down to a slightly more normal speed. Though walking through the silently opening glass sliding doors messed with my attempts at calm as I was immediately faced with long hallways to the left, right and directly in front of me, as well as staircases leading both up and down.

“Well, shit,” I mumbled to myself, glancing back and forth between all my different options.

Heading down the wrong corridor would definitely lead to me getting lost. There was no chance of finding Peter on my own. Unless…

“Hey Friday?” I asked, unsure. God, this probably looked so dumb. Could she even hear me?

A ding from my phone derailed my train of thought. Pulling it from my bag, it lit up with the new notification.

Friday: Would you like directions to Peter’s current location within the building?

I blinked a few times, looking at the message blankly for a few seconds. “Oh uhh… yeah, Friday, thank you. That would be very helpful actually.”

Friday: You are welcome.

Friday: Take the corridor to your right, then go straight.

The AI led me through the building, sending me text after text with directions, as I made my way through the long corridors. The walk led me past kitchens with state of the art appliances, lounge areas with ridiculously large TVs and every gaming console currently on the market and one or two that hadn’t even been released to the public yet. There were also doors protected by security panels that I assumed required at least 8 different forms of identification and possibly the promise of a first-born child to access.

I did not want to even think about how much all this had to have cost. Definitely more money than I would ever see in my lifetime; probably more money than I could even comprehend. Honestly the fact that Tony had even allowed me to come here, let alone know that it existed was impossible to wrap my head around.

Finally, after a long walk and definitely enough cardio for the day, another text popped up reading, “You have arrived at your destination” with a cute smiley face emoji. I took a shaky breath in and turned the corner. It was yet another living room, this time decorated in various shades of blue and brown. A random cooking show played silently on the oversized screen on the far wall, but what caught my attention was the pair of legs thrown over the back of the dark leather couch nearest to me, one leg bouncing ever so slightly. 

Peter…

A wave of emotions crashed into me, my whole body freezing in place. Fuck , it was so good to see him, even if it was just his freaking legs that I could see. The back of the couch was high enough that I couldn’t see any more of him. But knowing we were in the same room again, that I could speak to him again made me wonder. Would he just tell me to leave? Maybe he really didn’t want to see me anymore… Maybe he’d been trying to ghost me. Had coming here been a mistake?

Before I could move, whether that was to retreat back down the hallway or to close the distance between us, I wasn’t sure, Peter flipped backwards, pushing himself off the couch and landing on his feet. In his hands was a lightweight, super high tech looking tablet. I saw a flash of what looked like one of his suit designs before my eyes moved up his body, past his lightly muscled yet surprisingly strong arms, to his face. His eyes, those gorgeous brown eyes that I’d so desperately missed, widened as he saw me. Thickly padded headphones covered his ears, music playing so loudly through them that I could hear it from the doorway. No wonder he hadn’t heard me coming.

Was… was I supposed to say something first? I guess that would make sense, since I was the one who’d come to see him. 

He was just as frozen as I was. Seconds ticked by, agonisingly slowly, before he finally pressed a button on the tablet to pause the music and he pushed one side of the headphones back behind his ear. 

“How… how long were you standing there?” Peter asked, his voice quiet and uncertain.

“I uhh… just a few seconds,” I mumbled in reply, tearing my gaze away anxiously.

From the corner of my eye, I watched him blink slowly, absorbing this information, before he pulled the headphones off and placed them and his tablet on the couch. “Since you’re here, I suppose Tony…”

He trailed off, not finishing his question, but I answered it anyway. “Tony told me about his place, yeah. And he got one of his drivers to bring me up here.”

He nodded, not even a hint of surprise on his face. “Yeah, that sounds like something he’d do. Uhh, come in… take a seat.”

Peter sat back down on the couch, right way up this time, and I hesitantly made my way over to him and took a seat. Not too close to him, but not too far away either. He had one leg hooked up under him, half angled towards me, and I copied his position, still extremely unsure of how this interaction would play out.

Silence took over the conversation once more, Peter avoiding my gaze as best as he could, picking at nonexistent threads on his jeans. I took those moments to look at him. He looked exhausted, like he hadn’t gotten a solid night’s sleep in days. Though to be fair, neither had I. Maybe this separation had really affected him as much as it had me. And he hadn’t told me to get lost, so that was a good sign. Maybe?

Clearing my throat, I attempted to strike up conversation. “So umm… Tony says you’re all healed up again.”

“Oh uhh… yeah, it didn’t take long once they figured out what was wrong,” Peter replied, his eyes meeting mine for a second before moving away again.

“Good! That’s… that’s really good to hear.”

And… fucking silence again. It had never bothered me before. The quiet times Peter and I had had before had been wonderful, just peaceful little moments that didn’t need to be filled up with words. We would just sit together, hands entwined, just enjoying our time together. But this? This was so far from that. This was a twisted caricature of those moments. Sitting awkwardly on the same couch, with the feeling that he’d rather be anywhere but here, having this conversation with me.

My soulmate didn’t even want to look me in the freaking eye. Was it guilt? Was it disdain? Was he trying to figure out how to let me down easy?

“Talking used to be so easy between us, Peter…” My voice came out as little more than a mumble, but I knew he could hear me. “I miss that. I miss talking to you. I miss our texts and our dumb little jokes. I miss you , Peter.”

His hands clenched around his knees, and his mouth opened as if to reply, but nothing came out and he just closed it again. And still, he looked away.

My eyes burned, but I couldn’t cry. I wouldn’t cry. Not now. I’d done enough crying. “Do you know how much it was killing me to not even know that you were okay?”

“I… didn’t want to worry you. I thought it would be better to just…” He broke off with a strangled sigh, like there was more he wanted to say.

“To just disappear?” It was more worrying to not hear from you at all,” I said, angling my body to face him more. It was a challenge to keep the emotion from overtaking my voice completely, but this needed to be said. “All I got was a text from Tony saying that you were awake but that I couldn’t come see you. I tried, Peter. I tried so hard to talk to you, to at least know how you were doing. But I got nothing back and that broke my heart.”

“I know!” Peter’s voice turned desperate, pleading. His eyes snapped over to mine, moisture welling up in the corners that he quickly wiped away. “I read every text, listened to every voicemail you left. I wanted to call you back, believe me I did, but having me in your life is too dangerous.”

“Peter, I-”

But he was far from finished. “Do you know how much it would break me if something happened to you because of me? What am I saying? It already has! You’ve already been injured because of me, May has already been injured because of me ! And I may have been pretty out of it, but I could feel you trying to protect me from Doom. You don’t have any powers, but you tried to protect me anyway!”

Taken aback, it took me a second to respond. I shook my head to clear the momentary confusion, then replied, “Of course I tried to protect you! You’re my soulmate, I love you. I wasn’t just going to stand there and let him hurt you even more than you already were. I had to at least try to do something.”

“What?! What could you have done?” he demanded. “We are so lucky that Tony and Rhodey showed up when they did. But if they had shown up five minutes later… hell, even one minute later! Do you know how many times I’ve gone over that ‘what if’ scenario in my mind? How much I couldn’t stop myself from imagining what Doom could have done to you?”

My heart ached as I listened to him, at how he’d struggled just as I had been. But that didn’t make up for how he’d handled it and I felt that frustration flare up in me. “You’re right! I don’t know what I could have done. My only thoughts in that moment were of protecting you and that’s what I did! I don’t regret for a single second putting myself between you and Doom and I will not apologise for it. He would have killed you, Peter!”

“And he would have killed you!” His voice broke at the end of his sentence, and a stray tear trailed down his cheek, but he didn’t seem to even notice it. His eyes were locked on mine, burning with an intensity I hadn’t seen before. “Do you think I could have lived with myself if you’d died because of me?”

“And you think I could have lived with myself if you’d died and I’d done nothing? If Doom had just killed you in front of me? I know you’re hurting, Pete, but don’t think I wouldn’t have been affected just as badly as you would have been.” As hard as I fought it, I couldn’t stop the tears from spilling over my own cheeks.

He tore his gaze from mine once more, his throat bobbing as he swallowed hard. Fidgeting in his seat, he twisted his legs to the side… away from me. He didn’t have a response, nothing to acknowledge that he understood my side. Was this a futile conversation? Was all this going to truly be for nothing? Would he, no matter how hard I tried, pull away from me anyway?

With a somewhat shaking hand, I hastily wiped the tears from my face, wanting to remove any and all trace of their existence. My mind again drifted back to those moments where we’d spent what felt like hours just staring into each other’s eyes, those moments so peaceful and wonderful. Our hands entwined as we lay side by side, his thumb stroking along my soothingly stroking along my skin, his mouth moving silently to form the words ‘I love you’...

But then I blinked and the moment was gone, replaced with the two of us sitting on this couch. Instead of that peaceful silence, there was just this painful divide between us, Peter’s body now slightly angled away from me as he stared down at the carpet. His body was so tense. I just wanted to take away that pain, that fear, but I was the cause of it. 

My heart beat faster, that familiar tightening of my chest setting in. The room suddenly felt too hot, too confined. This was all going so horribly and it was almost unbearable, but if I left now, there might not be any chance for another conversation. This had to happen now.

“But-” My voice cracked on the first attempt, but I pushed through, forcing past that damned wobble in my voice. “But you could still text May?”

“I… it was just the one text, but yeah…” His breath caught, but he didn’t look back.

Another damned tear escaped and slowly rolled down my cheek. “You read every text, listened to every voice mail, but you couldn’t send me a single text to let me know you were alive?”

“I was just trying to protect you. I thought maybe if you didn’t hear from me, that… that you’d give up on me.” He crumpled, burying his face in his hands. “And that it would be for the best if you did.”

My mouth fell open, the words not registering immediately. “Do you really think I’d do that?” I asked, quietly, my eyes locked on the man I loved. “That I’d give up on my soulmate after not hearing from him for a few weeks? That’s honestly what you think of me?”

Peter’s head shot up, his beautiful brown eyes wide as they met mine. “No! That’s not what I meant! I was just trying to protect-”

“You don’t get to make that kind of decision for me, Peter Parker!” I cried. “You might be a superhero, but I’m not a child.”

“I know you’re not! But this is different. Way different. This is about your safety,” he argued.

“Peter, look at me!” I pleaded, more tears threatening to fall. He had to listen to me. He just had to. “I know it was a scary day. I know it was an awful situation for us to be in. But look at me! I’m fine. We are fine!”

He shook his head, his eyes moving down to my arm. “You may not be wearing that sling anymore, but you are not fine. That would never have happened if it wasn’t for me.”

While he was right about my arm not being entirely healed, he was so beyond wrong. “Peter, that’s not… You can’t think like that.”

“How else can I think? That’s the truth.” He said the words so plainly, so matter of fact. Though to be honest, he’d probably spent the entire time since he’d woken up agonising over it. “You got hurt because of me. I’m too dangerous to be around! You’re not safe with me.”

No, no no! Clutching at straws, I said, “But… clearly you’ll still talk to May. If you blame me for this, then fine, I understand, but please don’t give me excuses. Just tell me. If you want me to go, if you don’t want to be with me, then fine. But just tell me!”

His face fell. “No! Of course I don’t blame you for what happened! I blame myself for it!”

“Peter, listen to me, please. Look at Tony and Pepper. Yes, they’ve been in danger before, but he protects her and he loves her. And he needs her just as much as she needs him. They are a team, they support each other, they love each other!” It was getting even harder to keep that shakiness out of my voice, but he needed to hear this. If he didn’t listen, I wouldn’t know what to do. “I’m your soulmate… I love you, and I want to support you and be there for you when you need me. Tony and Pepper are proof that this can work!”

And there it was. The flicker of doubt, his brow furrowing and his mouth turning down at the sides. And his eyes, those beautiful eyes. Peter’s mouth opened, but he closed it again and looked at me, like he was staring into my soul, the soul that was the perfect pair for his. I wanted nothing more than to take him in my arms and kiss him until all his fears had completely left his mind. But that wasn’t a solution, it was a distraction. 

“I want to watch movies with you and have picnics in the park. I want to kiss you goodbye and wish you good luck when you go off to fight super villains with the Avengers…” I took a deep breath, steadying myself and pushed forward. “I want to get a house together, get more pets than is probably healthy and spoil them all rotten.”

He laughed, a tear-choked desperate kind of laugh, but it was something. A tightness in my chest eased a little at that sound. It had been so long since I’d heard him laugh and right now, it was the most beautiful sound I’d ever heard.

“I want that future with you, I see that future with you. But I need you there to have it. And you can’t do this superhero thing alone. Or… well, I guess it’s more that I just really don’t want you to do it alone,” I smiled at him, weakly. “I’m here for you. But I can only do that if you let me. So… will you let me?” And I held out my hand for him.

He stared at it, his own hand clenching, like he was holding himself back from taking it. “But… what happens if you get hurt again?”

“We’re a team,” I answered, reassuringly. “No matter what happens, we’ll get through it together. I promise.”

He tilted his head back up, and the pained look in his eyes sent a stab of pain through my heart. “I’m scared… I’m so scared. I can’t lose you, I just can’t.”

“Then please, don’t push me away. I felt like I was losing you and I couldn’t stand it,” I confessed, the pain of those memories still entirely too fresh in my mind. 

We were almost there, we were so close. And finally, finally , he lifted his own hand, and reached for mine, his movements so very hesitant. 

But there was one thing, I needed to say first. I pulled back for a moment and he paused, hand frozen. “Peter, I love you. I’ve said that so many times I know, but I need you to understand something going forward. I know you want to protect me, but I need you to understand that you can’t make decisions for me like that again, even if you think they are for my safety. You may be a superhero with more strength in your pinky finger than I have in my entire body, but we’re in this together. Okay?”

That fear, that glimmer of uncertainty still lingered in his eyes, but he nodded. And ignoring my outstretched hand, he twisted towards me and wrapped his arms tightly around my body, his face burying in my shoulder. And then we both just broke. My body shook as the sobs tore from my throat, my tears soaking into his hair and his shirt. But he was equally returning the favour, his own emotions hitting him just as hard.

As messy of a hug as it was, in Peter’s arms, things felt right again. Things were as they should be. And when his skin touched mine, I felt a faint tingling, like the rift between our bond, our souls, was starting to repair.

This wouldn’t be the last time this happened, I had no doubts about that. The fears and anxieties Peter felt wouldn’t… couldn’t be erased from this one conversation. If anything, this conversation would probably be brought up many times as we went through our lives together. Every time Peter had to face yet another threat to the city or hell, maybe even the planet, I’d feel those same fears I’d felt as he fought Doom. And if I was ever kidnapped or injured again, I would not be surprised if he freaked out again.

But Peter and I were a team. We were soulmates. And if we could handle the unconventional destiny that fate had thrust upon us, we could handle anything.