Chapter Text
It was raining on that awful day, the thunderstorm was coming to get her. She didn't mind getting wet, it was nothing compared to the inmense pain that took away her heart. Her trembling body, the consequence of her lack of sleep. How would she sleep good without her being clingy to her? She liked to be the big spoon. And now? She didn't have her.
It felt surrealistic to think about it. This wasn't in their plans. If only she could have known... Then she would have stayed in Japan, together.
Her daughter, just as her was watching in silence the name on the grave. Her usual composed face, now painted in Koharu's face.
Claudine just couldn't make it. She was staring into the ground, fighting the tears of grief. Her left hand felt so heavy, the ring on her finger felt like a rose's thorn.
"Why did you have to go first?" She mumbled, her voice cracked a bit.
They promised to be together.
Koharu took her hand, squeezing it. The little hand emanated the same warmth as her.
"Mommy wouldn't like to see you crying Mamman." The young girl said softly.
Oh Maya was such a stupid woman. How dare she leave them behind! Now they were both alone!
"I know sweetie..." Claudine breathed, rubbing with her sleeve her eyes. "It's just... I really miss your infuriating mommy."
Koharu's red eyes filled with tears. "I miss her too."
Claudine felt her knees failing her, so she kneel down and hugged her daughter, caressing the long raven hair. "Should we return home?"
The young lady shaked her head furiously. "I don't want to leave mommy alone."
Claudine nodded. "I..." Her voice cracked. "I don't want to leave her either, but she would be angry at us if we were to catch a cold."
Tears started to run down her cheeks, Claudine had hoped this day never happened. She wished that it was the other way around, Maya being alive with Koharu.
Maya was so much more stronger. She would have known what to do.
Koharu started to sob softly. And Claudine did her best to hide her hiccups and salty tears. The half French woman hugged her tighter, and a squeak made both jump in surprise.
The raven girl liked to carry around at least one of the plastic ducks Maya chose to hide at home. The brunette liked to play with them like that.
Of course both would search together to beat Tendou Maya. And they often did, that's why the brunette would sighed quite a lot and take out some rewards for them.
That's how they got a siberian husky and a ticket to Ucraine.
Claudine caressed straight black locks, and smiled to the little kid. "We will come tomorrow if you want."
Koharu nodded whipping away her tears. She made a reverence in front of the grave.
"I love you Mommy, I will see you soon."
Claudine stood up and watched in silence how some last tears fell down of her daughter's face. In her mind, Maya was watching them in silence, with her beautiful eyes and a little smile on her face, waving goodbye.
She gives the gravestone one last glance, and nods in its direction.
Tendou Maya
Beloved wife, mother and friend.
"A dream isn't something you see, but something you assert."
The soothing sound of the piano catches her attention. She follows the music through the house into a hidden room, the one place where feelings flows like the wind outside, in the wide sky.
Maya's humming is so melodic, that she gets goosebumps in every step she takes.
The brunette is playing the piano, dressed in a white formal shirt and a black pencil skirt, her heels moving slightly at the rhythm of the song. Her usual bow, today colored as an elegant white and her smooth hair falls down as a cascade of chocolate.
Her amethyst eyes closed.
Claudine shifts closer to her, not wanting to interrupt, she tries her best to not make any sound with her steps.
The song wasn't a happy one, neither a tragic one. Claudine couldn't describe it, how it made her feel.
But she is sure her wife is enjoying herself.
A little girl was seated at her side, watching in awe how the brunette looked so perfect and sounded so perfect. To Claudine, it was the most beautiful view she had ever seen.
The raven girl notices her and lifts her hand to say hi.
Claudine smiles, waving a hand to her. Then she brings her index finger to her lips and tells the kid to keep quiet. The little girl smiles, understanding why.
Maya hums, her expression is unreadable to Claudine.
Je te laisserai des mots
Claudine gasps at her singing, Maya usually liked to mess around with her in her native language, teasing her in French seemed to be her favorite thing to do.
But singing in French?
That's a whole new level.
In her seven years of marriage, four years of dating each other and three years of friendship she never knew how Maya decided to learn to speak fluently her language, it remains a mystery to her, give the brunette the points for being a infuriating spouse til today.
Maya liked to maintain this mysterious appearance, liked to play hard to get. Well maybe the last part was something Claudine liked to do if she was being honest with herself.
En dessous de ta porte
The platinum blonde haired woman could not believe how Maya's usually powerful voice could become so tender and reach low notes. Not that she is complaining, in fact she wanted to compliment her... But everytime she tried it, both of them ended engaged in a passive aggressive conversation.
Tout pres de la place ou tes pieds passent
Watching her, being so relaxed with their daughter... Living together, reaching higher places, aiming to be the very best in France.
They both have achieved it in Japan. Now, it was the time to try in another place, with different people.
Cache dans les trous de temps d'hiver
The smile on Claudine's lips didn't fade. She remembered how the brunette started to stutter, her lips glossed with chocolate when she asked to marry her.
She remembered the routine Maya had when she was preparing for a play in school. She needed to finish two hours prior to the performance.
What for?
To munch a lot of chocolates.
And that happened on that day, at the top of a mountain. Maya wanted to go on a trip, so both could be alone together without any interruptions, and she made sure everything was set to have a lovely dinner under the night sky at 4 Pm.
Claudine wasn't allowed to touch any of the food on the picnic basket til 7, so she waited impatiently.
Et quand tu es seule pendant un instant
As Maya played the piano, Claudine's mind drifted away, to her most precious memories.
Who would have thought they would be so good together?
Neither of them were the type to have fights. Her friends even said their relationship was " so sweet, you can easily get diabetes while watching them"
Every time Claudine felt like falling apart, Maya was there to hold her in her arms.
Every time Maya felt like the world was against her, Claudine would kiss her and be by her side.
They were a team.
Embrasse moi
Quand tu voudras
There was one day, when they still lived in Japan. Nana Daiba was the director of a new movie, and she starred Maya as the protagonist, the green eyed woman gave her a difficult character and Maya had a challenge to show the correct expressions.
The brunette sat down heavily at the couch, making Claudine lose her focus on the TV show she was watching.
"Is there something bothering you?" She asked a little annoyed at Maya.
"Yes, Daiba-san... wants me to... Forget it." Maya mumbled while reading the script.
Claudine rolled her eyes, typical of Tendou Maya. "You look stressed Maya."
She just hummed, distracted with the script on her hands. She took a sip of her cup of tea.
Claudine had been thinking about telling her about something important she had in mind, but looking at her tensed shoulders made her stop every time she gathered the courage, Maya really looked tired.
Or maybe it was the perfect time to tell her. Now or never.
Claudine grinned, moving closer to the owner of her thoughts. She cupped Maya's face in her hands, making the brunette stop her reading to stare into rosy eyes.
"I want a baby."
Maya choked on her tea, she spilled the rest of the tea on her pants. But the look on her face was adorable.
"R-really?"
The platinum blonde woman smiled, nodding to confirm. Containing her laughter.
Maya blushed, and the red crept to her ears.
Embrasse moi
Quand tu voudras
Wonderful memories, Maya's voice always has been breathtaking, but today the brunette made her live in the past while singing.
Koharu looked at Maya in such adoring way, Claudine wished to take a photo of that moment.
Even Hachi, their dog was sleeping in the corner of the room.
Claudine was so lost in her mind, that she didn't notice when Maya opened her eyes and stared at her with love written in her lilic eyes.
Hell yes, she will kiss that dammed woman all the times she feels like it.
Embrasse moi
Q uand tu voudras
When they arrived home, Hachi was waiting for them. Feeling the same pain from their lost, he rubbed his head against Claudine's legs and Koharu's face, whining softly.
Koharu hugged him, her hands running through his fur.
"The swan finally flew away.. " Claudine whispered looking at the door hoppless. Knowing she would never hear Maya's tired footsteps again.
In a table was resting a box with Maya's belongings. That car accident cost her the love of her life.
The police said a drunk driver didn't stop on a red light near the theater, and Maya was in the wrong place and time. They instructed her how to issue the man, but the sadness didn't let her think straight.
Maya's accident even appeared on television... That hurt her even more.
Next the driver's seat in Maya's car, they found a box of macaroons with a letter for her and a giraffe plushy for Koharu.
Claudine knew why the brunette bought them.
She thought Claudine and Koharu were angry at her for leaving them alone in a special day. Maya promised to come back home early next day, to take both to their favorite restaurant. But her new manager was late and she didn't have any option, just wait. She texted Claudine to wait longer for her, that she would be late again.
Claudine waited two more hours.
But Maya never came home. So she decided to take Koharu herself and drove her to the restaurant.
"We already left, tx for leaving us again." She texted Maya in annoyance.
Half an hour later she received an "I love you"
That was the last message Maya sent.
Maya couldn't make it into the hospital. The doctors said she lost too much blood.
Claudine asked if she suffered in the process and the doctors didn't have the heart to answer her. Claudine stared at the box. Not knowing if it was okay to take Maya's things yet, she didn't want to read the letter and to give Koharu the plushy would make both of them cry again. The knot in her stomach was so tight she felt like throwing up.
An empty bed awaited her.
She thought about going to sleep with Koharu instead, she didn't want to face her new reality. One without the constant teasing and lovingly arms of Tendou Maya.
Home.
It wasn't home without her.
Claudine didn't notice how Koharu went away with the husky. She supposed her daughter decided to find the rest of the hidden ducks in her house. Claudine let her, she didn't have the strength to stop Koharu. She headed to the couch, letter in hand, the scent of lavender was still strong in all the house.
Why?
Her rosy eyes filled with tears again.
Her phone started ringing, she picked up without thinking about it.
"Kuro-ko..." It was Futaba's voice on the line. "I saw the news... I'm sorry I can not be there but I promise to go visit you as soon as I can."
Claudine didn't say anything.
"I know, you are feeling terrible right now. But I want you to know that Tendou wouldn't like to see you cry." She whispered, her words fell heavy on the air and Claudine's breathing hitched.
She knew Maya wouldn't like it. Even when she always told her that she looked cute when she cried.
She didn't need to be reminded about it.
She needed the brunette to cross the damn door, sigh and tell her this was just a cruel joke.
"She really loved you. And I want to remind you that we love you. " Futaba said. "Kaoruko is crying right now... You know, Tendou was her best friend... but she wants to talk with you too. She says she wants to stay in France for a while with you. "
"Thank you.." Claudine whined. "I... I don't even know what to say or do..."
"You need to rest first Kuro-ko... I'm going to call you again tomorrow, promise me you will try to sleep." Futaba said, waiting for Claudine's answer.
Claudine promised she would try. They talked, or rather Futaba talked about remembering the good days, about taking a good night's sleep every night since today on. Claudine walked dragging her feet. She opened her bedroom door and got in bed without changing her clothes.
Maya's scent still lingering on the pillows.
She ripped off the envelope and started to read:
Dear Claudine, I'm really sorry for not being able to come back home. Please remember to keep chasing your star, never give up on your dreams. Don't lose hope, my love. I want you to reach the highest place in the world, you deserve it.
I gave you my world, attached with my heart. Forever yours,
Tendou Maya.
Claudine fell asleep crying.