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The worst kept secret in Washington was that Leo McGarry was an alcoholic. The second worst kept secret in Washington was that Josh Lyman and his assistant were in love.
The whole staff knew. Interns would get the run down as soon as they arrived. They'd slept together, they're secretly married....the rumors had no end. Sometimes it was hard for Josh and Donna to walk down the halls together, hearing the whispers, seeing the disapproving eyes that barely averted as they strode past. Donna would see Josh's stiff expression and start making jokes (probably at his expense) and he would get caught in her smile and forget about everything else for a little bit.
The whispers died down when Josh was shot. Donna made some calls to his assistants while he was being operated on. Her voice was small, but strong. Resolute. They knew Donna Moss would whip their asses if they slacked off even a little this week. They got to work, knowing they could try to replace Donna but they needed her back. It couldn't be anything but love that made her work 18 hour days. They needed her back.
CJ was first. One night on the Bartlet campaign Josh had tumbled into her office with his messy hair and sleepless eyes and started rambling about a new girl that had "just shown up, CJ! She didn't have any money or a place to live or—" and after CJ smacked him upside the head for hiring someone so vastly underqualified, she looked up the number and called Donna, the bright young woman that Josh hadn't been able to stop talking about. They met in a diner at midnight. CJ arranged a place for her to stay, gave her a couple thousand bucks. She warned her about his arrogance. "Don't let him walk over you, Donna." And Donna smiled and replied, "How could he? With heels, we're the same height." And CJ had known Josh had met his match.
When the bullet pierced Josh's body, CJ, the spinner, knew she could spin the story to the White House and to the press and to the public but she didn't know how to spin it to Donna. Donna rushed in with worry in her eyes, all of it melting away after CJ told her the president was going to be fine. "Oh thank god," Donna sighed. "That's the best news I've ever heard." It was then that CJ Cregg cursed herself for not being quite as good at her job as she believed, because her heart shattered and she gave Donna a shining moment of peace before she'd have to know.
It was Toby, brave Toby, who delivered the news in the end. And CJ—who had been there at Rosslyn, seen the horrors; the bloody bodies and shattered glass—couldn't bear to look at Donna's crumpled face.
Abbey Bartlet came into the waiting room after Josh had been in surgery for six hours and put a comforting arm around Donna's shoulder. She bit back a joke about falling in love with someone people were shooting at. Instead she offered her some water and a warm presence. Everyone else had work to do but Donna had nothing to do except wait for her boss to come out alive. Abbey knew how she felt. She had felt it too, hours before, wondering if her husband would make it. So the First Lady stayed, and held her hand, and prayed that two miracles could happen on the same day.
When Josh returned, safe and healthy, everyone thought it'd be different. But it wasn't. Donna was just a little more protective of him than usual, but otherwise, life went on.
The kitchen workers knew that Donna Moss had no poker face.
She'd come into the mess, hair rumpled, bags under her eyes, and chef Moretti would wordlessly place a cappuccino in front of her. After Donna drank it all he'd sit on the edge of the table and cross his arms. "I'll beat him up, ya know. I know he's overworking ya. I'll beat him like a couple of eggs." Donna would shake her head, blue eyes wide. "No, Josh is doing so much, I'm barely chipping in. He's trying to pass a bill that would massively impact adoption policies! There are states where—" Chef Moretti couldn't always follow exactly what she was talking about but knew that the eighth sentence could be roughly translated to "Josh Lyman owns my heart" and the eleventh sentence meant "I would do anything for Josh Lyman". The cooks sometimes couldn't stand Josh with his tendency to yell at the TV and his inability to finish a plate of food, but they adored Donnatella Moss to pieces so they tolerated the man whom she loved oh so much.
Amy Gardner had heard the rumors and seen the signs, but Josh Lyman wasn't as stupid as he seemed. A relationship with a subordinate? The entire administration would be compromised. He wasn't single, not really, of course, but when Josh walked into her office with that gorgeous smile and witty personality, she couldn't help but fall for it. She knew Donna would hate her forever and she knew she'd probably regret it but those dimples were hard to resist. So she asked, as if it made any difference, "Are you dating your assistant?" He said no, his voice unusually high and strained, but a no nonetheless, and Amy buried her guilt in the justification that Josh seemed to want it, too. She'd seen others do it. The White House was a hard place to work and keep a relationship, but they were still humans; still needed closeness. She'd seen the way Toby and CJ look at each other, every smirk daring each other to be more blatant every day. She'd heard about Joey Lucas and Al Kiefer, nothing but a quick fling to loosen the tension that their job brings. How was this any different? Something about the way he kissed her made the twinges of guilt disappear.
Ryan Pierce noted that Donna was overqualified. When he was dropped in Josh Lyman's office he hadn't been prepared to be schooled by Josh AND his senior assistant, but that's what he got. Donna was smart, knew everything, and had that balance between pragmatism and compassion that made her a force. Ryan sometimes wondered why Donna was working for Josh, and not the other way around. At the very least, he thought she'd have moved on by now, but he noticed things. Lingering stares from both of them, brushes of hands on shoulders, banter that could only be described as "married". Yet nothing ever happened. Ryan found it curious that two people who were so smart could be so dumb.
Leo wasn't naive. It was on the news, reports flooding in about the explosion in Gaza. So much news, and all bad. Congressmen dead. Admiral Fitzwallace dead. So much news, and yet none about Donna. Leo had watched as Josh, his top political mind, lost it, his vicious tirade giving way to unimaginable pain. Leo watched as the man he'd come to think of as his son strained to hide his feelings, even now.
"If there's someplace you'd rather be everyone would understand." Josh had looked back at him, tears in his eyes, until at last, with a soft "thanks" he was gone.
Leo knew too well how it felt to feel pulled to two places, one here, where the work is, and one far, far, away across the ocean, where the heart wanted to go.
Peter and Miranda Santos were adjusting. Their new home was so big and had so many hallways. "Ms. Moss, this place is so big. Did you ever get lost?" Donna took Miranda's small hand.
"I did. A lot, actually. But you'll love it here. Your daddy does very important work and helps lots of people. Plus there's a bowling alley!" Donna said, smiling as she glanced over her shoulder. The President and First Lady were still occupied. She turned back and sat down, her eyes level with Miranda's soft brown ones.
"Is your house this big too?" the five-year-old asked curiously.
Donna bit back a laugh, thinking of her tiny, cat hair ridden apartment. "Oh no, honey. I live by myself, no need for all this space."
Miranda cocked her head. "Why don't you live with your husband? Mr. Lyman?" Donna blushed at her innocence.
"He's my— he's not my husband," Donna replied, looking at the ground. She found it inconvenient that her eyes were prickling with tears.
"Are you sure? You always yell at him and fix his tie and he looks at you the way daddy does before he kisses my mommy." Miranda seemed to think Donna didn't really know what she was talking about. "He looks all soft and dumb and then I have to look away because they're being all mushy and gross and I'm just a kid."
Donna chucked in spite of herself. "Josh—Mr. Lyman looks soft and dumb around me?"
Miranda nodded. "Haven't you noticed?"
June 22nd, 2008. Josh smiled down at Donna. The spring light was bathing her in a gorgeous glow, just like the day they met when Donna took his staff badge and his heart. "Do you think they knew? Do you think they would've fired us? Hated us?" He asked her softly.
His bride looked at him, her eyes full of happy tears. Her fingers played at his bow tie, crooked, put on by someone who wasn't her. "I think they were rooting for us," she whispered.