Chapter Text
“No way, he’s much cuter!”
A group of girls stood around, giggling, and fantasizing about their latest crush, unbeknownst to them that someone lingered nearby. Out of nowhere, a confident chestnut-haired boy made his presence known by throwing himself against the wall next to the group of girls.
He kept his head down with his arms crossed, posing in a cool manner. Letting them take in all the glory that was Clyde Donovan. Once he felt all the girls’ attention were on him, the flirtatious brunette slowly lifted his head, dramatically revealing a seductive sneer. “Hello ladies, I couldn’t help but over hear you fighting over me.”
Used to leaving women speechless, Clyde gave them a moment to compose themselves before speaking again. “I know what you’re thinking, and no, you’re not dreaming. I’m really here. So, which one of you lucky ladies would like to have the honor of accompanying me as my date to the spring dance this weekend?”
When no one immediately spoke up, he unfolded his arms and flipped the nonexistent hair from his face. “You don’t have to be shy, ladies. I won’t bite…at least, not until after the dance.” He remarked, finishing his sentence with a wink and a snort.
Suddenly, all at once, the group of girls busted out laughing, leaving behind a puzzled and humiliated Clyde. Holding his head down in shame, he exited the school and joined his two best friends, Token and Craig, on the playground over by the swings. As he approached, he could see Token was already reading tonight’s reading assignment while Craig was doing something on his phone.
Plopping down in an unoccupied swing, Clyde let out an exaggerated groan waiting for one of his friends to ask him what the problem was. When his groans of despair though his cry went unnoticed. He then began pumping his feet sluggishly as he let out another exaggerated groan, this time louder. Silently rolling his eyes, Token let out a groan of his own as he sat his book down, giving his attention to the depressed Clyde. “What is it this time, Clyde?”
“I struck out again. I’ve asked every girl in school and they all said no. I can’t understand what I’m doing wrong. I used all my best moves!” the chestnut-haired boy complained, twisting his limp body in the swing. “Well, at least we can all go as group so we don’t all look like complete and total losers who couldn’t find dates.”
Token and Craig both look at one another then back to him. “Um, we both have dates.” Craig informed, making Clyde pause his swinging to focus on his friends.
“You’re kidding, right? Please, tell me you’re joking.” he asked, first looking at Craig and then Token, searching for any possibility they were just being mean.
Token shook his head, “no, we really have dates. I’m taking Nicole.”
“And I’m taking Tweek” Craig said right after, leaving Clyde spiraling downward, deeper into the pit of depression than before the conversation began. It wasn’t longer before his sadness turned to an embarrassed rage.
Leaping from his swing with one hard push, Clyde landed in a strong stance in front of his friends. “What ever happened to ‘bros before hos’, huh?” Clyde growled, quickly taking off not waiting to hear what the other had to say. Angrily, he scurried off the playground and down the street while wallow in his own self-pity.
He couldn’t believe his friends didn’t tell him that they already had dates. Did they just enjoy making him look like a fool? Feeling overly steamed from this whole situation, Clyde headed to the one place where everything made sense. Where no one would ever lie or keep secrets from him.
“Hi! Welcome to Raisins! Table for one?” An enthusiastic petite girl with long shiny black hair greeted him at the door. Clyde gave a sad shallow nod as he followed the raisin’s girl lead him to his table for one. When he sat down, he supported in his heavy head on his hands and his elbows resting on the table.
Though he was handed a menu, he didn’t bother opening it up. He already knew what he wanted. He was going to order enough to eat his pain away. “Hey there, cutie, this here is Marjorine. She’s our newest raisin girl, so please tip her nicely.” The dark-haired girl said with a giggle before leaving him alone with the new waitress.
Barely lifting his droopy eyes, Clyde did a double take when he saw the sweet new waitress was standing beside his table. She was wearing the official raisins girl uniform complete with orange short shorts and a skin-tight white tank top that showed off every curve on her body. Her golden blonde hair was tied into pigtails, and at the end were orange bow that match her short shorts.
She was beautiful
“H-hello, umm, sweetie, what can I get for you?” Marjorine kindly asked with a timid smile while taking out a small note pad and pen. She lent in closer to hear his order better, her flat upper torso pressed on the surface of the table close to him. Her voice was so unique. It was gentle but not overly feminine and also a tab bit raspy.
Feeling his confidence return, Clyde give his signature smile as he scooted closer to the pretty blonde. “That depends, are you on the menu?” He said smoothly, jerking an eyebrow up in a flirtatious fashion.
“No, no, I don’t think I am. At least, last time I checked I am not.” She slowly answered, seeming genuinely confused about his order but still wrote something down.
With a low and sensual chuckle, Clyde tried putting the moves on again. This time he would be gentle. “Well then, can you recommend anything? What do you and your boyfriend usually order?” Hook, line, and sinker. This way he will know if she’s available.
However, unexpectedly, this got a laugh for the blonde. Not again. He was done being laughed at by women today. “Don’t be silly, Clyde. You know I'm not dating anyone.”
That voice. It wasn't the same as the cute and raspy voice from earlier. He has heard this voice somewhere before, but where. Though it took him longer than he would care to admit, when he finally realized who the voice belonged to, he could have almost died. He just flirted with Butters.
Without taking his eyes off his pretty face, Clyde hurried and opened the menu, hiding his face behind the contents in case someone recognized him. “Butters? Butters, what are you doing working here? And why are you dressed up as a girl?” He questioned, keeping his voice low but harsh and loud enough for Butters to hear him.
Catching her pink bottom lip between her teeth, Marjorine crinkled the pad in her hands. “Oh, you know, they had an opening a-and well, they were looking for someone who could fit the uniform, so…here I am.” She stated while modeling his new clothes. “Don’t I look nice?”
Clyde wouldn’t admit it here, or anywhere in public, but Butters did look nice in the Raisin’s uniform. And with his natural small stature and innocent cuteness, it would be hard for some people to resist that face and smile. It had completely fooled him. “Can I just order now, please?” Clyde asked, embarrassed to be seen talking to a cross dressing Butters whom he had just put the moves on.
“Ah, right! S-sorry! Ready whenever you are.” Marjorine panicked, preparing to write down his order, almost dropping the notepad. After finishing his meal, Clyde quickly paid and left for Token’s house, not even sticking around to ogle the other Raisin girls like he normally would.
Pounding on the giant front doors of Token’s mansion, he didn’t cease until someone finally answered. “Hey Clyde, I wasn’t expecting you to come by. Thought you’d still be mad when we said we had dates.” Token stated, letting him in to the large foyer.
“What? Me, mad? Nah, I just went for a walk is all.” Clyde lied, concealing his true feelings as he was guided up the stairs into Token’s elaborate room. Inside, Tweek and Craig were waiting for Token to get back so they could continue their game.
Resuming their game, Clyde watched from the bed as they finished the last battle. “We’ll let you join next game, ok Clyde?” Craig stated while reloading his virtual weapon. After the final match, they started a new game, now having a four-man team. Sometime during one of the loading screens, he was briefly distracted when a deadpan voice began to speak. “Sorry we didn’t tell you earlier.” Craig apologized, showing as much sympathy as his expressionless face could manage.
After taking a drink of his coffee, Tweek discreetly nudged Craig, “Sorry about what?”
“We didn’t tell him we already had dates for the dance.” Token answered for Craig while keeping the brunette in sight. “I guess we just assumed you already knew. After all, we are dating them. I guess that was our bad.”
He fought to keep the jealousy he had for his friends down. He knew they weren’t bragging but when it seemed like everyone is dating or has a date while he is always alone. Clyde couldn’t help but feel the slightest bit of envy shine through, causing him to act sometimes irrational . “Actually, I have a date.” Clyde involuntarily announced, surprised by his own words.
All his friends look at him. “You do? Who?” Craig asked just as the screen finished loading and their match began.
“Oh, nobody you know. She…goes to another school.” Clyde informed them, trying to bring the attention off him and back towards the game.
“Still, it’s great you found a date. We can’t wait to meet her.” Token gave his own thoughts as they immersed themselves back into the game.
During the entirety of the evening Clyde wanted to bash his head with the controller. Why did he dig himself into this hole of lies? He knew he didn’t have a date and now if he didn’t show up with one then everyone was going to know he lied. He’d be the most lyingest liar of all time! He needed to find a date. And fast! It was at this moment, he thought of a crazy idea. If it was good enough to fool him, then it just might be good enough to fool everyone else. At least for one night.
The next day, a desperate Clyde stalked the halls, ready to pounce when he found his target. If this didn’t work, then he was screwed because he was all out of ideas. As his target turned the corner, with a firm grasp, he abducted a surprised Butters to a secluded area behind the school. “No, stop!” Butters squealed, kicking, and struggling to get free. However, he was no match for Clyde who over powered him easily.
Pinning the terrified boy up against the wall, his hands close to his head. Attempting to console the panicking Butters, Clyde tried to get Butters to stop squirming in his arms. “Butters, it’s just me. Chill.”
Butters cracked open one eye and when he saw who it was, he ceased any further struggling. “Oh, Clyde! It’s only you. Umm, did you need something?” He cheerfully asked.
Raising a finger to his lips, Clyde hushed the boy. “Be quiet, Butters. Now listen, what I’m about to ask you may sound a little strange but I’m being completely serious. I need your help with something very important.”
“Sure, I’ll do whatever I can to help!” Butters immediately replied, willing to help without even asking what the favor was first.
He took a long breath as he held on to Butters’ shoulders. Exhaling, Clyde finally asked his question, “Do you already have a date for the dance?”
Cocking his head slightly, Butters was taken back by the question. Clyde did stay it was going to sound strange. “No, why?” he answered. He could hear the sadness in his voice from no one asking him.
Swallowing hard, the embarrassed brunette’s face grew bright red. He squeezed Butters’ shoulders harder causing the boy to flinch. As he released his grip, he took another deep breath and asked another his other question. “Then would you go to the dance…with me?”
Butters didn’t answer this question as fast as he did the others. His face wasn’t showing refusal, so that was good, but he certainly wasn’t jumping in excitement over his proposal. Judging by his face, Butters was just as concerned with his request as Clyde was humiliated for asking.
“Why are you asking me? Aren’t there plenty of ladies that would want to go with you?” Butters questioned, cupping his hands together and bringing them close to his chest.
Clyde eyes never left his own withdrew his hands from the nervous boy’s shoulders. “Well, you see, I…Dammit, Butters, are you going to help me or not?” he barked, causing the timid boy recoil in shock from Clyde’s harsh tone.
“Y-yes! I’ll help!” Butters stammered, waving his hands out in front of him.
That was easy enough. Feeling some relief, Clyde smiled and let go of Butters’ shoulders. “Good, thanks. Oh, but there is one other small thing. I told everyone my date is from another school so no one can know it’s you, got it?” Pretending to think for a second, Clyde snapped his fingers and said, “Hey, I got it. Why don’t you dress up like do you at work?”
“But I dress up as a girl for work.” Butters stated, making sure they were on the same page.
Clyde eagerly nodded his head. “Exactly! You looked good in your Raisin’s uniform yesterday so why not?”
Butters brought a finger up to his chin as he thought over his answer. After a few seconds, he sweetly smiled as he kicked a foot against the floor and a pink blush crossed his cheeks, “You really think I looked good yesterday?”
Looking around to make sure there was no one around, Clyde veered his head, feeling the huge amount of embarrassment hit him once more. “Yeah, you did, Butters.” He mumbled loud enough for only Butters’ ears to hear.
With a bizarre squeal, Butters smiled grew wider as he threw his arms in the air. “Ok! I’ll do it!”
Thank God
“Ok, great, so I’ll pick you up around six tomorrow? And remember, don’t tell anyone." Clyde couldn’t stress enough. He had to make sure Butters didn’t forget and decided to let everyone know they were going to the dance together.
Butters nodded, excited to be apart of a secret. "I won't tell anyone, Clyde! Cross my heart and hope to die." He said this while using a finger to put an X over his heart.
Clyde smiled at Butters cute way of promising just as he walked away. But he wasn't a few steps down the hall before an enthusiastic Butters caught up with him and stayed by his side as they walked together. “What do you think I should wear? He asked. His eyes sparkling at the all the possibilities.
“I don’t know, Butters. Whatever you pick will be fine.” Clyde wearily said. Though the topic still embarrassed him, he did enjoy seeing how excited Butters was now that someone asked him to the dance.