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Finally Loqi received the promotion to the rank of Brigadier General. He achieved it thanks to his own hard work, but he knew that it meant nothing for his family. After a short phone call with his father Loqi was told again that the rank of a General was still not enough. That he could achieve even better goals and do it faster, too. To his family it didn't matter how he did that. But to Loqi it did matter, he wanted to reach his goals with his own hard work only. Not by using his name or getting some higher ups to like him.
Because no one really cared about his promotion Loqi wasn't going to celebrate it in any way. He stayed in his office in Gralea and did some paperwork that actually wasn't due for at least another week. He sipped on his coffee. Having no one to talk to at this place at least gave him enough time to get his work done.
Suddenly someone knocked on the door to his office. Loqi glanced at the clock beside his desk. Already 9 p.m., who would come to him at this hour? Loqi realized he hadn't answered the door when there was a second knock. “Who is there?” he asked. It was appropriate to know who was brave enough to get on his nerves at this hour.
“Ravus Nox Fleuret.” a voice answered outside the door. Loqi felt nervous all of the sudden. Did he make a mistake? Was there something wrong with the last report he handed in? “Come on in, sir.” he stuttered out. ‘Calm down Loqi, calm down.’ he mumbled to himself.
Ravus entered the room and glanced to Loqi, then over to his desk and the pile of papers. “You're still working?” Loqi looked quite confused. “Yes. Is that a problem? May I ask why you visit me at this hour, High Commander?”
Ravus sighed. “Well, haven't you been promoted today? I thought you'd be out and celebrate, but I walked past your office and the light was still on..”
Loqi moved his gaze away from Ravus and stared down on his lap instead. “You've met my family more than once, Commander. You know they don't care. Also no one here cares either. I'm surprised that you do.”
The taller man took two steps further into the room, now standing directly before Loqi. “You're right. I know them and that's why I care. It may sound weird coming from me, I tend to be quite the workaholic myself, but you should use that sparse freetime that you have. It's important to have a time out from all this once in a while.”
“And do what exactly? Going out on my own is pretty boring. I'd rather work and get stuff done.” Loqi remarked and sounded a little offended at being told what to do in his freetime.
Ravus couldn't help but smile a little. Even though he wasn't as sassy as Loqi, the man reminded him of himself. Ravus tended to concentrate on work and stayed on his own, too. “Then let's go out for a drink together. To celebrate your promotion, okay? It's on me.”
Loqi stared at Ravus as if the man just told him the most ridiculous story ever. “I err.. I'd rather..” he didn't know what to say and Ravus’ glare made it hard for him to decline. Loqi felt a little flustered by the sudden invitation. “Alright. Okay like.. right now?” Ravus answered with a nod. Right now it was then.
The High Commander led Loqi to a small bar in Gralea. Loqi always thought bars would be too crowded and too loud, but this one was actually really nice. It was rather empty, only a few people sat in a corner at the back of the room. The light was dim, giving the room just the right mood.
They sat down in front of the counter. Loqi tried not to show his discomfort with bar chairs. He didn't like the fact that he almost had to climb them to sit down. Of course Ravus didn't have a problem with that at all. The barkeeper, a tall and sturdy looking lady, smiled at the both of them. “What can I get you, sirs?”
Loqi was at a defeat here. He never went drinking and didn't know anything about alcoholic beverages at all. Gladly, Ravus started to order first: “Whiskey on the rocks for me.” Loqi decided he would just have whatever the Commander was having. Ravus never seemed to have a bad judgment. “Me, too.” he said a little too fast.
Ravus raised an eyebrow. “You drink whiskey?” He guessed Loqi would like something lighter, like a sweet wine. “Uh.. Sure, sir.” Loqi nearly stuttered. Was going with Ravus’ decision wrong after all? It was too late to think about that as their drinks were served before them.
“You know, just Ravus is fine.” the taller man stated while taking his drink in his hand. Loqi looked up at him. “Then just Loqi is fine, too.” They both shared a little smile. Still, Loqi felt quite uneasy. He eyed Ravus swinging his glass slightly, smelling it's content once and then taking a sip out of it.
Loqi did his best to imitate what he just saw, but somehow miscalculated that sipping thing and ended up gulping down nearly half of his glasses content. Right after the liquid came running down his throat he had to give it his best to keep a straight face. ‘Fuck it burrrnss’ he screamed inside his mind.
Ravus gave him a side glance. He could clearly see how Loqi struggled to not make a disgusted expression. After taking another sip of his whiskey Ravus couldn't stop a little chuckle. “Glad you like it so much.” Loqi's cheeks turned pink. He didn't know if Ravus noticed and is now making fun of him or not. “Tastes great. Very unique.” Loqi coughed out, his throat still burning.
It was weird seeing Ravus actually smile and even hearing him laugh. He was so known to always be stern and reserved. But Loqi wasn't much different. This was their free time, no strict military rules, no need to be so stiff. They had a little smalltalk and finished their glasses.
“Another one?” Ravus asked when Loqi set the empty glass down on the counter. Loqi's face had already turned a bright shade of red, while Ravus looked completely unchanged. Somehow Loqi felt challenged, even though he knew he shouldn't. “Ssure.” he half-slurred.
The barkeeper accepted their order with a smile and prepared them a second glass of whiskey.
It was about half of the second glass later, that Loqi started to reminisce the past, remembering how he first met Ravus. “You know..that one day you were invited over to our household for sssome dunno..paperwork stuff I guess? I was a teen back then and..” he paused, took a big gulp of whiskey as if to drink some more courage into him, “I ssaww you and wow I mean back then I thought I saw n’ angel ya know?”
Ravus nearly choked on his drink. Did he hear correctly? He blushed slightly. “You thought that? I only remember that you were quite shy back then.” Loqi nodded and continued: “Yeah like to be honest I err.. guess I fell for you a lil’ n’ I had a sstupid crush on ya for like sssooomee years?” Loqi laughed nervously, drinking the remaining content of his glass.
“B..but don’t worry it’s in the past okay? Like totally not feel that way ‘nymore.” he slurred, now completely bright red cheeked, the blood having even rushed up to his ears. Ravus felt a little taken aback by the sudden confession, but in the end, it was quite a nice compliment. He thought about that thing he once heard, that drunk people always tell the truth.
If Loqi told the truth, his feelings have truly subsided by now and the fact that he didn’t try to get closer to Ravus made that somehow clear as well. “Glad I’ve been your teenage fantasy material, I guess.” Ravus grinned at him, teasing Loqi a little. The poor drunk man would have blushed even more if it was still possible. “Tha..that’s..uh.. y..yeah you’re welcome sssir..?” he managed to answer.
While Ravus took his time to finish his drink, he ordered a glass of water for Loqi. Loqi took it with a little complaint. “I’m not a kid..” he mumbled with a sulking expression. Still his burning throat demanded some non-alcoholic liquid, so he complied. Ravus smiled. “Quite a kid who is completely drunk after two only half-filled glasses of whiskey.”
Loqi wanted to protest, he got up from his seat, apparently wanting to show that he was not tipsy at all, just to nearly stumble over his own feet and onto Ravus, who catched him before he could fall. “Guess I’m a lil’ tipsy…” he mumbled, sounding rather defeated. Ravus put some cash including a nice tip on the counter as he got up. “Let’s leave. Goodbye.” he said to the barkeeper. The lady behind the counter smiled. “Thank you as always. Goodbye.”
Loqi needed Ravus’ help to get out of the bar, and somehow, everything afterwards was hazy. When he finally awakened from his slumber, a piercing pain in his head, he felt lost. This was neither his private quarters, nor his office. Loqi panicked as he looked around, then finally realizing that he was on the couch of Ravus’ office. ‘Oh gods, what happened last night?’ he asked himself, slowly sitting up.
As his eyes wandered to the table in front of him, Loqi saw a note, along with a glass of water and a pill that was probably a painkiller. He struggled reading the note with that massive headache, but he managed.
‘Take the pain killers and don’t rush. You have a day off today. Get some rest and don’t forget to eat. Greetings, Ravus’
That note sure was nice, but it didn’t clear up anything that may or may not have happened the night before. Loqi was still confused, but grateful for Ravus’ care. He took the pill, drank the water and took his time to slowly crawl off the couch and out of the room. He spent the rest of the day doing what Ravus told him, resting, and wondering if he said or did something extremely stupid.
In the evening, he made up his mind and called Ravus. “It’s me, Loqi. Thanks for the pain killer, it worked well. Uh.. I don’t want to bother you but somehow I don’t remember much after like.. ordering the second round. I hope I wasn’t being weird or something..” There was a hint of embarrassment in his voice.
Ravus listened to Loqi, then answered as calm and reassuring as possible. “Don’t worry, you were a little tipsy, I needed to help you walking a little, that’s all. Since my office was closest and I didn’t know where you kept your keys for your private quarters, I just brought you there. Need another day off?” Ravus didn’t want to tell him about Loqi’s drunk confession, it was something he kept secret until now, it was something that’s already in the past, so it was fine. He would keep it a secret, too.
Loqi felt relieved. “No I think I’ll be fine tomorrow.” he paused, “Thanks.” he almost whispered. Ravus only answered with a “No problem” and a “Good night” before the call was ended. It was a strange feeling, talking to Ravus like that, after years of crushing on him, then having him as his superior, having gained Ravus as a ‘friend’ was something completely new.
They kept in contact after that, even when they were stationed at different places. At least once a week, one of them would call. Usually it was Ravus, since he always had a strict time schedule and called when he had time to spare. They talked about a lot and about nothing at all. About having siblings, being the big brother, about military things, complained about snow storms… Even though neither of them was good at socializing, they seemed to never run out about things to say.
Some weeks later, they both met again in Gralea for an important meeting. Loqi hated meetings, they always ended up extremely boring and unnecessary. He always kept rambling about meetings being nothing but a waste of time, that his younger siblings once made him a coffee mug with a handwritten text on it saying ‘this meeting could have been an email’. He loved that mug so much that Loqi always kept it with him, and mockingly, used it at meetings as well.
They greeted each other formally in front of others. Both agreed that, since Ravus was his superior and all, they would treat each other as expected of them. Also, even though he didn’t mention it to Ravus, Loqi feared that them being too friendly to each other might just rise up new rumors behind his back.
The meeting was, in fact, extremely boring. Loqi tried hard not to yawn, while Ravus kept his stiff expression the whole time. After the meeting had finally ended, Ravus stayed behind to talk to the protocolist. Loqi already went ahead, but was stopped by a hand on his shoulder.
“You looked like you were about to fall asleep, General Loqi. Are you not getting enough sleep?” Ardyn asked while he rounded the smaller man and suddenly stood before him with a smile. “I assure you, my sleep schedule is fine.” Loqi answered, trying hard to avoid further talking. It always felt odd talking to the Chancellor. Not only did he use his first name, which Loqi hated, he also was always so hard to read.
“Well, I guess that’s good. You know, these meetings are boring for me as well. But it’s by our Emperor’s wish to uphold these meetings, and who are we to defy him, right?” Ardyn stated in his usual tone. Loqi didn’t really believe a word. “Right. Well I gotta leave, sir.” Loqi quickly tried to free himself from this situation. “Of course, I don’t want to keep you from working, Loqi dear. Farewell~.” Ardyn squeezed his shoulder once before he left and finally passed by.
Loqi shuddered. ‘Loqi dear…?’ That was definitely something he didn’t want to hear from anyone, especially not Ardyn. On his way back to his office, he heard some of his higher ups talking. He could make out his name being mentioned, but didn’t hear anything in particular. Loqi always tried to hide it, but it bothered him that people kept talking shit about him. They were jealous of him reaching his goals so early, not believing that it was due to his hard work.
It didn’t leave Loqi alone. He sat in his office but just couldn’t concentrate. First the Chancellor, then these stupid gossipers. It felt humiliating to always be kind of mistreated. What else could he do other than work hard and show them that he’s serious with his ambitions?
Lost in his thoughts, Loqi didn’t notice the ringing of his phone. After it kept ringing for a minute, he finally snapped out of it, saw the phone number of Ravus’ office on the display, and answered. “Ravus? What is it?” he asked. Ravus kept silent for a few seconds, as if not knowing how to say whatever he wanted to express. “It’s just..I’ve heard them talking about you and I’ve been concerned if you have gotten wind of that new gossip about you.”
Loqi did hear people gossiping before, but didn’t make out any words. “Not really. Heard them saying my name, that’s all. Is it bad? I mean, is it worse than what they’ve made up before? You can tell me, I don’t care.” But he did care. And Ravus hesitated again. “Well, I’d say so. They are talking about how you..” he paused, trying to find the best way to say it, “how you supposedly ‘sucked some dicks’ to climb up ranks.”
That was it. The worst possible shit someone could say about him. Loqi didn’t want to believe what he just heard, he wanted to scream. “FUCK THEM! Do they really think I’d sink so low as to suck someone off for a raise? Do they think I don’t have any fucking pride?!” While he screamed at the phone, Ravus kept silent. Tears formed in Loqi’s eyes, his anger turning slowly into sadness. “Is that why the Chancellor crept up to me today? Calling me by my first name and dear and all that stuff… did he think I’d do him some fucking favor?!”
Loqi didn’t fight the tears now falling down his cheeks, he couldn’t hide his sobbing either. He was mad, he ranted and let it out on Ravus, but Ravus wasn’t at fault in any way. “Ardyn did that? … Are you crying?” Ravus asked, but it was already clear. “I’m mad okay? These fuckers are going too far! I work hard, I do my damn best but all their incompetent brains can think of is that I’ve cheated my way up with being a slut…?!”
Suddenly, Ravus had hung up on him. Maybe he ranted too much, maybe he shouldn’t have screamed at Ravus. But it wasn’t directed at him, Loqi just needed to let it out. Just few minutes later, the door to his office opened without a knock, and Ravus entered. He looked seriously worried, an expression that Loqi saw for the first time.
Ravus took a chair from the small coffee table and placed it next to Loqi at the desk. He sat down, handing Loqi a tissue in the process. “I know you work hard, Loqi. I know you’re neither of the things they accuse you to be. This has gone too far. I’ve already dealt with the guys I heard that gossip from. They know that, if I hear them talking shit again, I’ll personally cut their tongues off so they keep silent. I don’t tolerate gossiping, it doesn’t matter about whom.”
Loqi listened, while he cleared his face from remaining tears. Ravus continued: “But as I consider you a friend, this might be something personal as well. I’ll talk to the Chancellor, too. Maybe he was just being overly friendly and weird as always, but if he truly meant it as some kind of advance towards you, I’ll make sure he doesn’t do it again.”
It took some more long minutes for Loqi to finally calm down again. “I appreciate it, Ravus. But are you sure to go against Ardyn? Won’t that have any consequences for you?” Loqi had already wondered for some time now, since Ardyn and Ravus seemed to talk quite often, how their relationship was. They didn’t seem to get along well.
“It’s fine. I fight and disagree with him a lot. And I’m sure that if I could, I would have killed him several times now. We’re certainly not getting along, but he does listen to my advice often enough.” Loqi still looked so damn sad and Ravus wished that he could actually help him right now, but Ravus was sure he sucked at comforting others. Any time Luna had cried, he didn’t really know what to do either.
Ravus took Loqi’s hand and squeezed it slightly. He wasn’t the type for much body contact, but he tried to reassure his friend that, in fact, things would turn out okay. “It’s gotten late. You should get some rest. Keep that anger and let it out back on the battlefield at your next mission. I’m sure you’ll do good.”
Loqi nodded, and somehow, unknowing to Ravus, he had said just the right words. “Right, I will. I’ll show them. Just watch me, I’ll use that anger as a fuel and soon I’ll surpass you as well.” Loqi smiled, just faintly, but it was there. Ravus smiled, too. “Don’t get too cocky, kid.”
“I already am. Thanks, Ravus..” Loqi half whispered. It was hard to thank someone truly, not out of formality. They parted for the night, and Loqi swore that one day, he would pay it all back. One day, he would give Ravus the same support and devotion that he had received from his friend.