Chapter Text
[chimochi & taetae]
taetae:
how’s your date going jimbles??
wait why am i even asking
i’m still mad at u for not choosING UR LITERAL SOULMATE TO COME WITH U TO THE HARRY STYLES CONCERT
chimochi:
WE MADE IT TO THE FRONT ROW
taetae:
omfg
he’s sO HOT
I HATE U SM
chimochi:
forgive me taetae ;-;
sungwoon says helloooo
taetae:
hiii sungwooniieee~
k fine i forgive u（>﹏<）
chimochi:
thanks tae <3
i promise i’ll treat u
taetae:
damn sure u will
chimochi:
u know i love u
taetae:
love u too <3
***
[jeon.jk and taetae]
taetae:
kookie :((((
jeon.jk:
what’s wrong
taetae:
m sad
jeon.jk:
why?
did tannie pee on your laptop again?
taetae:
no
god
why did u remind of that
no really this ones woRSE
...
kookie???
jeon.jk:
did jimin go to the harry styles concert with sungwoon instead of u?
taetae:
OMG HOW DID U KNOW
jeon.jk:
just saw his instastory
i’m sorry man
r u mad at him?
taetae:
noooo i mean it’s their first reAL date
like real real
not their usual cringy college library date
and they look happy
it’s just..
THAT WAS HIS ONLY CONCERT IN SEOUL AND I LOVE HIM SO FRIGGIN MUCH LIKE LOOK ATHIM HES A DAD
jeon.jk:
maybe he went with sungwoon bc they actually enjoy his music and not just his appearance
taetae:
meanie u know i LOVE his music
1d stan since day1
jeon.jk:
hey i know u feel left out but u know jimin loves u more than jin loves his own face and that means a lot
just forgive him
next time he’ll go with u
taetae:
yea
ur right i guess
thanks kookie <3
jeon.jk:
:)
***
The next day...
[the fanTAEstic five]
jinnieminnie:
Good morning my precious children
I have an announcement to make
taetae:
what is it eomma
jinnieminnie:
First of all
I normally would scold you for calling me that but I’m in a very good mood right now
Second of all
I HAVE THE JOB!!!
taetae:
OMG REALLY
OMG OMG
IM SO PROUD ;-;
WE NEED TO CELEBRATE
YALL BETTER BE FREE TOMORROW
jeon.jk:
congrats hyung!!
i’m always free
jinnieminnie:
Your future barista
I knew the chef couldn’t resist someone as handsome as me
jeon.jk:
lmao why does the guy in the right corner kinda looks like u tae??
taetae:
ikr????
buT that’s not the essential question here
jinnieminnie:
Elaborate my child
jeon.jk:
what the actual fuck r u wearing??
taetae:
that’s not exactly the way i’d phrase it but
yea skjkj
jinnieminnie:
A pink rabbit costume why?
jeon.jk:
yea
why
taetae:
i think it’s cute tho
still
i wanna know too
jinnieminnie:
Well, listen here kiddos
My chef asked me what I could offer to his café as a barista and I ordered him to just look at my face and he was like “yes Seokjin-ssi I see you are very handsome but I’d like to know what your abilities are” and I was like “I could walk into your cafe wearing a pink rabbit costume and still attract every single tourist and also I make really good coffee” and then he laughed and said something like “I’d like to see you making coffee with a rabbit costume on” and that’s how I got hired a few hours ago
jeon.jk:
oml
is this is a joke??
pls tell me it’s a joke
moonie:
It’s not, I’m a witness
taetae:
ur chef sounds cool
where do u have that cute ass costume from???
jinnieminnie:
Ebay lol
Any other questions?
jeon.jk:
who’s that guy next to u
jinnieminnie:
Oh that’s my coworker Jung Hoseok
You guys definitely need to meet him he’s too funny
A literal bouncy ball of joy
Laughs like a seal and all
jeon.jk:
lmao i see
he’s literally outshining u in the picture
jinnieminnie:
That’s why you’re my least favorite
jeon.jk:
*pretends to be shooketh*
jinnieminnie:
Anyways where’s my third son?
taetae:
chim is probably still sleeping
he had a date yesterday night
got home late
jinnieminnie:
Ahh I’m so happy for our Jiminie
Sungwoon really looks like a nice guy
taetae:
he’s amazing!!
jinnieminnie:
Well babies break is over I need to work
jeon.jk:
look how he’s flexing
***
[jeon.jk and taetae]
taetae:
so
jeon.jk:
?
taetae:
that hoseok guy
jeon.jk:
what’s with him?
taetae:
u think he’s cute?
jeon.jk:
huh?
i said he’s outshining jin
u know i love to mock him
why
do u find him cute?
taetae:
no
i mean he’s indeed handsome
just asking
jeon.jk:
tae ur acting weird
taetae:
m not
jeon.jk:
u are
taetae:
am not
jeon.jk:
ugh okay
***
[chimochi and taetae]
taetae:
jiminie?
answer me when ur awake
love u~~
***
[the fanTAEstic five]
[jinnieminnie has added ur_hope to the fanTAEstic five]
jinnieminnie:
Guys this is Hoseok!!
Hope you don’t mind that I added him
ur_hope:
hiiii guys i’m jung hoseok (just call me hobi tho) and my bi ass needs new friends
jeon.jk:
hi i like ur hair
taetae:
holaa!
ur_hope:
thanks~~
moonie:
Hey Hoseok!
It was nice meeting you today
Too bad I had to leave that early but my essay was waiting
ur_hope:
aish namjoonie stop talking so formally we’re already like bros ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
moonie:
K bro
Sry bro
ur_hope:
lmao guys i’ve never seen a man this proud as namjoon when jinnie got the job
he was literally the cutest
jeon.jk:
i can imagine
jinnieminnie:
That’s why Joon’s my man
moonie:
Nah stop I’m blushing
taetae:
TT
ur_hope:
ngl u both made my lonely ass a little jealous ;-;
moonie:
Don’t be haha
We’ve been together for an eternity now
We’re basically married
ur_hope:
thanks that made everything better lmaoo
jinnieminnie:
Well we have 2 single ladies to offer in this fam
taetae:
I’m practically married to myself so I’m not a single pringle
ur_hope:
jungkook u free? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
jeon.jk:
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
taetae:
gross
jeon.jk:
i’m in the city rn
r u guys still working??
ur_hope:
no we just finished but jin and i are having coffee right now
just drop by~
jeon.jk:
be there in 5!
***
[chimochi and taetae]
chimochi:
good morning <33
taetae:
I LITERALLY WAITED FOUR WHOLE HOURS BITCH WHERE WERE U ITS AFTERNOON ALREADY
chimochi:
wtf i was sleeping
u sounded way more nice four hours ago
taetae:
ngghhh never mind
tell me about ur date
chimochi:
tae r u fine?
u seem a lil stressed
taetae:
let’s talk about that later
now spill
chimochi:
uhm okay
welllll we really enjoyed the concert
sungwoon started crying when harry sang “sweet creature” so cute
taetae:
aHH THE LARRY FEELS
chimochi:
ikr????
too bad sungwoon couldn’t relate i literally had to explain to him who larry is
taetae:
u wouldn’t have had this problem with me bro
chimochi:
ANYGAYS after the concert we took a taxi back home and talked about our future plans and apparently he wants to be a professional singer which is amazing!!
i really like him
but likeee
i wasn't all excited after our date idk i thought i’d be all butterflies and stuff u know
taetae:
oh boi just give it a little bit more time to grow
that was ur first real date
u have to meet him more often to have those butterflies dancing beneath ur sexy abs
chimochi:
ASDFGH
but yea ur right
now tell me
what’s eating u up
taetae:
uh well
did u scroll through the group chat already?
chimochi:
nah not yet
gimme a sec
taetae:
don’t burn ur tongue
the tea is boiling
or maybe it’s my blood
...
chimochi:
well
taetae:
well??????
chimochi:
who is this hoseok and how do we get rid off him
taetae:
OMFG THIS IS WHY U R MY BESTIE LIKE I THOUGHT I WAS OVERTHINKING THINGS AGAIN BC KOOKIE ISNT MY BOYFRIEND BUT U KNOW IM GETTIN SO SCARED OVER THE TINIEST THINGS .-. IM JUST SO AFRAID THAT HE WILL NEVER SEE HOW MUCH IM IN LOVE WITH HIM AND THAT HE DECIDES TO BE WITH SOMEONE ELSE EVENTUALLY
chimochi:
ssshhhH tae
i totally get that u refuse to tell kook how u feel bc of ur friendship
but kookie spends 90% of his time with u and i’m more than just sure that he loves u the same way but he’s way too stubborn
he rather swallows down his feelings to make sure everything’s fine between u two and i know ur doing the same but as ur soulmate i know that u can’t hold ur feelings for a long period of time so the day will come when u will confess to him and believe me it will turn out perfectly fine
taetae:
i just can’t imagine that ;-;
chimochi:
istg he loves u so much taetae
u will see
taetae:
so u don’t think hoseok is going to steal him away from me? :(((
chimochi:
i promise u he won’t
taetae:
if u say so..
thank u jimbles u know that i love u right??
chimochi:
i love u more tae
***
The next day...
[the fanTAEstic five]
[taetae has changed the fanTAEstic five to the TAEsty six]
taetae:
(≧▽≦)
ur_hope:
♡＾▽＾♡
***
[chimochi and taetae]
chimochi:
k what happened???
taetae:
i definitely changed my mind bout hobi
chimochi:
i noticed lmao
taetae:
kookie convinced me to practice some dance moves in the studio today and guess who’s there
chimochi:
shakira shakira
taetae:
no u dumbass
hobi was there
AND HES LITERALLY A SUNSHINE
I MEAN
BESIDES U
UR MY ONLY SUNSHINE
BUT HES SO NICE AND FUNNY U NEED TO MEET HIM ASAP
chimochi:
i’m gonna see him tonight at the party
so kookie didn’t show any signs of attraction or smth??
taetae:
no not at all
i think i talked to hobi more than kookie did lmao
chimochi:
that’s great tae!
taetae:
ikrrrr
chimochi:
well see u later at the partyyyyyy
taetae:
can’t wait!!!!
u gonna love hobi he’s hilarious
***
[the TAEsty six]
moonie:
Everyone home?
taetae:
yessir
jeon.jk:
yeeet
chimochi:
i fuckin hate aclohol
but yea i somhwo managed to crawl bcak home
ur_hope:
i drove u back home and even tugged u to bed BE THANKFUL
chimochi:
THANK U HOBES~~
taetae:
what about u jinnie??
moonie:
He’s sleeping already
taetae:
:’)
give him a good night kiss from me
moonie:
Where?
jeon.jk:
his left nipple lmao
taetae:
HIS FOREHEAD DUMMIE
moonie:
He almost punched me
Thanks Tae
taetae:
no prob~
moonie:
Hey Hobi?
ur_hope:
hey bro
moonie:
About your friend who needs friends...
What’s his name again?
ur_hope:
min yoongi
what about him?
moonie:
As we already mentioned earlier, just add him to the group chat
taetae:
yea ur friend is our friend
chimochi:
thatsss the famly spiriiittttttt
jeon.jk:
chim just go to bed
chimochi:
WhY aren’t y’all drnk
jeon.jk:
it’s called “knowing ur limits”
ur_hope:
u see
the thing about yoongi is that he doesn’t want to meet any new people so he may comes off a lil rude at the beginning but he’s actually super soft
and he definitely needs new friends so i’ll convince him somehow
moonie:
Yeah do that
taetae:
do daaaatttt
ur_hope:
thanks guys ;-;
joon give jinnie a kiss from me as well as a thank u for introducing me to u weirdos lol
moonie:
K
I think he broke my nose
+++