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Spring—
Bee always told Andrew that life was comprised of seasons.
And in return, Andrew always took it upon himself to pointedly roll his eyes when she brought it up. If life was made up of seasons, it seemed he was forever fixed in a never ending, barren winter. There was no hope of spring for someone like him. And certainly no use in holding out hope. Andrew had always dismissed the thought, deeming it unrealistic. It was just another cliche; a meaningless platitude for people to hold onto.
But Andrew couldn’t help but remember Bee’s words now. If life was comprised of seasons, then maybe, just maybe, his winter was coming to an end.
The apartment was modern, stylish and comfortable. It was far too big for him and Neil, but Andrew didn’t mind all the space. They had chosen it in particular because it was a ten minute drive away from the Exy stadium where their team trained. Their team. Andrew savoured the thought. After two long years of long-distance, countless flights and bittersweet skype calls, Neil was finally beside him again.
Andrew headed out to the balcony, steadfastly ignoring the piles of boxes that still needed to be unpacked. He would deal with those later. Leaning against the railing, he looked out, taking in the sight.
The sun was sinking, painting the sky a sweet, rosy pink. From the balcony, Andrew could see grand mountains in the distance. Everything was green, full of life, a near opposite of where he’d lived in Boston, or South Carolina. He took a breath, inhaling the crisp air, the underlying scent of the flowers blooming below. Andrew privately admitted he could see why Neil loved Colorado so much.
Gentle footsteps sounded from behind him, marking Neil’s presence before Andrew was joined at the railing. Neil leant casually against the cool metal, his hair an absolute mess where it fell over his forehead. Andrew’s fingers were suddenly moving of their own accord to fix it. In return, he received a warm look from Neil, lips curving into a gentle smile. Andrew felt his heart clench painfully. He never understood how Neil could look at him like that — so sweetly, so unbearably honest.
“Thanks for helping me unpack,” Neil teased him. “Really appreciated it.”
Andrew dropped his hand and rolled his eyes, ignoring the fondness in Neil’s gaze. “Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit, Josten.”
“But the highest form of intelligence,” Neil’s grin was unbearably smug. Smartass.
Andrew cocked his head slightly. “I’m surprised you know Oscar Wilde.”
“I’m a man of many talents.”
“Is shutting up one of them?”
“Not a chance,” Neil’s grin became teasing, overwhelmingly fond, as he inched closer. Andrew moved toward him, drawn like a magnet.
“What a shame,” He muttered, making Neil snort in response.
Neil gently raised a hand to cup his jaw, giving Andrew enough time to move away. The thought didn’t even cross his mind. Instead, Andrew pressed into his touch, hands coming to rest delicately at Neil’s hips.
Neil’s clear blue eyes searched his face, smile broadening. The full force of his joy made his freckled nose crinkle slightly. Andrew committed the sight to memory, feeling impossibly dazed.
“What?” Andrew murmured. It almost hurt to look at Neil; it was like gazing into blinding, brilliant sunlight.
Neil just shook his head, still smiling softly. He leant into Andrew and finally pressed their lips together, meeting him in a greedy kiss. Andrew sighed, gently enclosing Neil in his arms and pulling him closer.
As he pulled away, Neil kissed his cheek, smile still playing about his lips. He looked angelic in the dusky pink light. Andrew fixated on the smattering of freckles across his nose, his scars from a lifetime ago that had become familiar, comforting, the stubborn strands of hair that had somehow become wild and rumpled once more. He burned with longing.
“Something on my face?” Neil said innocently. Andrew was not fooled.
“You’re the worst,” He sent Neil a deeply unimpressed look. Laughter spilled from Neil’s lips, easy and carefree.
“Maybe,” He conceded, ducking his head. He looked far too pleased with himself. “But you’re moving in with me anyway, so.”
Neil’s tone was joking, light-hearted but Andrew knew what this move meant for them, the significance of it. There was no going back from something like this. Andrew rifled around in his back pocket, fingers closing around the key, before he tossed it to Neil. With his unerring striker reflexes, he snatched it from the air with ease.
Andrew watched Neil’s face carefully as he took a closer look at the key, studying the expressions that flew over his features. It settled on something like bright-eyed wonder as Neil looked up to meet Andrew’s gaze.
“Don’t look so surprised. It’s your apartment too,” Andrew knew that wasn’t the point. But he said it anyway.
“Yeah, but...” Neil trailed off, still looking overwhelmed by the key. That Neil still responded in this way to something as minuscule as a key made something in Andrew’s chest tug. He felt the ridiculous urge to hold Neil close to his chest and never let go.
“Andrew, these are the keys to our house. Our home.” Neil said in that earnest, honest way of his. Andrew tried to ignore the dizzying way his heart spun at the words ‘our home’.
“Come here, you sentimental idiot,” Andrew tugged Neil gently, pulling him into a secure, steady embrace. Neil exhaled shakily against his neck, and Andrew’s arms tightened of their own accord, holding him even closer to his chest. Standing there with Neil in his arms, on the balcony of their new apartment, the sweet smell of gardenias and jasmine in the air, warmth blossomed in Andrew’s chest like the early blooms of spring.
Summer —
Andrew was sprawled inelegantly on the sofa reading a book when he heard the front door creak open slowly, cautiously. Frowning, he placed the book face-down beside him.
“Neil?” Andrew said carefully into the quietness. Neil should be coming back from his morning run but usually he was loud and conspicuous, filling up the apartment with his presence.
“Mm, it’s me,” came Neil’s reply from somewhere near the doorway. Something about his tone was — different, a little off. Interest piqued, Andrew left the sofa and headed in the direction of Neil’s voice.
Neil’s back was turned when Andrew came up behind him. He narrowed his eyes. Neil was attempting to remove his running shoes without using his arms, ineffectually scraping his shoes against one another. His arms were occupied by something he was holding protectively to his chest.
“Josten, what is that?” Andrew’s voice was sharp. But he had a terrible feeling that he already knew.
Neil slowly turned, having given up on his fight with his shoes, and gave Andrew a sheepish look. In his arms were two small cats, not quite kittens. The black one glared at Andrew rather imperiously, while the other, a fat, splotchy thing, stared up at Neil lovingly, completely ignoring Andrew’s presence.
Andrew snorted. This was what his life had really come to. “Care to explain?”
“Andrew ... “ Neil said in that honeyed, pleading way of his. Andrew hated to admit that it worked on him, never failing to make his stomach flip traitorously. “You know how hot it is outside, and they were living on the street.”
“You practically lived on the streets for seven years,” Andrew pointed out, rather meanly. Neil sent him an exasperated look, but Andrew didn’t miss the way his lips twitched in amusement.
“‘Drew, it’s summer. It’s unbearably hot. And I think something happened to their mother,” Neil continued, oblivious to the way the nickname made Andrew’s heart clench. “I can look after them, I swear. They’ll be my responsibility.”
Andrew was about to comment that Neil Josten and responsibility were two mutually exclusive things when Neil glanced down at the cats, his expression softening into something tender. The words died in Andrew’s throat. He stared at the unbidden smile tugging at Neil’s lips as he pet the fat one with a gentle finger. It purred, leaning affectionately into his touch.
How someone who had been through hell and back could be so endlessly considerate and loving, Andrew didn’t know. He burned with the sudden urge to kiss Neil senseless. Unpredictable, his brain whispered, unreal. His pipe dream.
“Fine,” said Andrew, trying to sound apathetic. The glowing look Neil sent him suggested he had failed. “But you’re cleaning the litter box.”
Neil just rolled his eyes in response, though the full effect was rather diminished by his tiny, pleased smile.
-
Much later, after they had taken the cats to the vet and stocked up on cat food and other necessities (including a shitload of toys, at Neil’s insistence), Andrew and Neil were collapsed together on their sofa.
Neil sat sideways, feet in Andrew’s lap, as he pet the Fat and Clingy one, who dozed in his own lap. Black and Bitchy lounged across from them, taking up an entire armchair like the nuisance she was. But in truth, he didn’t mind so much, Andrew reflected as he idly traced patterns into Neil’s ankles.
“Andrew?” Neil asked, looking up from his phone. He looked as if he were biting back a smile, eyes shining with something like amusement.
“Neil,” Andrew said suspiciously.
“Have you decided on their names?” Neil said, voice innocent. Andrew was not fooled.
“Cat 1 and Cat 2,” He pointed at the cat sleeping peacefully on Neil before gesturing to the one sitting on the armchair. She blinked at him slowly, looking remarkably unimpressed for a cat. Andrew stared at it in response.
“Absolutely not,” said Neil, breaking the impromptu staring contest. Andrew turned to raise a brow at him.
“Fine. Fat and Black.”
Neil snorted. “That’s almost worse.”
“What are your brilliant suggestions, then?” Andrew shot at Neil, fingers still absentmindedly tracing his ankles.
“I’m very glad you asked, Andrew,” A tiny, secret grin had escaped into his lips. “Because I went to the Foxes for help.”
“Matt suggested ‘Jane Pawsten’ and ‘Emily Lickinson’,” Neil held back a laugh as he read from his phone. He glanced up at Andrew, smile tugging at his lips. “I immediately vetoed him.”
“Should’ve blocked him as well,” Andrew muttered. Laughter spilled from Neil’s lips, doing ridiculous things to Andrew’s heart.
“Aaron said ‘Cat 1’ and ‘Cat 2’,” Neil said, sending Andrew a wry grin. Andrew tried to hide how strangely pleased he was that he and Aaron had thought of the same names but if the knowing look in Neil’s eyes was anything to go by, he suspected he had failed.
“And Allison just replied ‘aww, you guys are adopting?’ which was no help at all so I ignored her,” Neil finished.
Andrew waited for him to continue before realising that was all. “I thought they would have come up with an array of stupid names.”
“Well, most of them voted for Nicky’s suggestions,” A sly smile had crept back onto Neil’s lips and Andrew had a very bad feeling about it. Instead of reading the names out, Neil sat up, handing Andrew his phone so he could see the text messages.
Nicky: you two got CATS?! kings of being domestic
Nicky: hmmmm king fluffkins andddd
Nicky: sir fat cat mccatterson!!!
Matt: marry me that’s amazing
Renee: Yes! Those are hilarious names Nicky :-)
Nicky: gladly matt (sorry dan) and thank you my darling renee
Nicky: neil use my incredible names or ELSE :)
Andrew snorted derisively and Neil took that as a sign he had finished reading the messages. Sinking back into the sofa, Neil glanced up at Andrew, eagerness written all over his features. Andrew met his gaze with an exceedingly unimpressed look.
“That’s atrocious.”
“It’s sweet,” Neil countered, “We could call them Sir and King for short.”
“They’re female cats.”
“Wow, way to enforce gender roles, Andrew,” said Neil, teasingly.
Andrew narrowed his eyes at him. They both knew that Andrew was just posturing; in truth, he really didn’t care what Neil named them. Andrew still didn’t care for a lot of things, but if these idiotic names made Neil happy, that’s what they were naming the hell beasts. A tiny part of him accepted long ago that he’d follow Neil to the ends of the earth if it would make him happy.
“Whatever,” Andrew finally said, turning back to his book.
Neil laughed, the sound warming Andrew’s insides like hot chocolate. The cat dozing on Neil — Sir Fat Cat McCatterson, Andrew reminded himself derisively — promptly woke up in response, and upon noticing that Neil had ceased his petting, she rubbed her head encouragingly against Neil’s hands.
“See? Sir loves her name. Tell him, Sir,” Neil gathered the cat into his arms, letting it snuggle into his chest. “‘I love it, Andrew! You’re my favourite parent!’” Neil said in a ridiculously high pitched voice.
It took a herculean effort for Andrew to fight a smile off his face.
Autumn —
When Neil banished Andrew to their bedroom after the distinctive beep of their oven sounded, Andrew didn’t quite know what to think.
It was his 26th birthday. Andrew didn’t care for birthdays as a general concept, and certainly didn’t give a shit about celebrating his own, but the idea that Neil had gone out of his way to bake something for him made his heart squeeze in his chest.
Nicky had FaceTimed them earlier to bid Andrew a happy birthday and some of their old teammates texted their well wishes. Andrew had also received a package from Renee containing the newest book from a mystery series he had mentioned to her over the phone, as well as a handwritten letter in her familiar, messy scrawl.
It was puzzling, almost borderline ridiculous to him that they cared so much, but somewhere, deep down, he could grudgingly admit to himself that he was appreciative of them.
“Shit!” Neil’s agitated voice drifted through the open doorway, distracting Andrew from his thoughts.
“That doesn’t sound very promising,” Andrew said.
He heard Neil heave a weary sigh. “Hilarious. You can come out, Andrew.”
Feeling unexpectedly curious, he pushed himself off the bed and left their bedroom. He found Neil in the kitchen staring mournfully at an awfully blackened and burnt chocolate cake. He still had oversized, pink oven gloves on his hands (a gift from Nicky). Andrew huffed in amusement at the sight.
“Is it supposed to look like that?” He deadpanned.
“Asshole,” Neil sent him a withering look.
Andrew inclined his head, as if in agreement. Neil rolled his eyes in response, though it was more fond than anything.
Neil strode over to the fridge, and opened it, before systematically taking things out. Andrew watched, feeling faintly amused. Finally, from the back of the fridge, Neil retrieved a plain white box. He replaced everything and shut the door.
Neil set it down on the kitchen island, and gestured for Andrew to take a look. Inside the box was a decadent triple-chocolate cake, decorated with perfect and loving precision. In cursive, written with melted white chocolate, the cake read, ‘Happy Birthday, Andrew’.
“This was my backup cake, I knew something would probably go wrong if I baked it myself,” Neil said, watching Andrew’s face as he studied it.
Andrew hummed in agreement, privately struck by Neil’s forethought. “I’m impressed, Josten.”
Neil brightened, looking overly pleased with himself. His hands drifted to twist at the bottom of the hoodie he was wearing, Andrew’s eyes tracking the movement. He suddenly noticed Neil was wearing Andrew’s old Foxes hoodie, an 03 inscribed on the glaringly orange fabric. This, paired with Neil’s infinite thoughtfulness, made him feel suddenly dazed, sending his heart spinning in his chest.
Perhaps it showed on his face, as Neil raised a questioning brow at him. Andrew scowled. Neil smirked, looking sweet and self-satisfied.
“Kiss me?” He asked, sounding unbearably smug. Andrew couldn’t tear his eyes away from Neil’s smile, boyish and teasing.
Andrew took a step closer and fisted his hands in Neil’s — his own — hoodie. Neil rested a hand on Andrew’s chest, making him briefly wonder if Neil could feel his heart racing. Carefully, Neil slid his hand to curl around the side of Andrew’s neck, fingers meeting the hair at his nape. Held in Neil’s capable hands, Andrew felt inexplicably safe. Content.
He leaned forwards, lips meeting Neil’s. Underneath his hands, Neil’s body instantly became soft and pliable, melting into Andrew’s touch. Neil let out a tiny, pleased hum against his mouth. Slowly, Andrew loosened his grip on Neil’s hoodie and lifted both of his hands to cup Neil’s face tenderly. He kissed Neil until he became weak with it, until a tingly warmth had diffused through his entire body.
Neil lovingly pressed a few more kisses against Andrew’s lips before they separated, looking suitably flushed. He let his hand rest against Andrew’s jaw for a moment, fingers brushing gently over his skin, before dropping it. Andrew felt his heart clench.
“Okay, come on, I’ll cut the cake,” Neil indulged Andrew in one final kiss before pulling away to search for a knife.
-
Some time later, they were curled in the lounge with the cats, sharing a slice of cake when Andrew’s phone rang.
He scooped up the final bit of cake and held out the fork to Neil, who shook his head. “You have it.”
With a shrug, Andrew ate it himself.
He then reached for his phone and checked the caller ID. It was Aaron. Andrew paused for a moment. It wasn’t necessarily odd for Aaron to call; he did so at least once a month. It was just — unexpected.
“I’m going to see what this shithead wants,” Andrew said, making Neil snort in response. He got up from the sofa and headed for the balcony, letting his fingers brush lightly through Neil’s hair as he passed.
Once outside, Andrew shut the door behind him to prevent the cool, late autumn air from travelling inside. Leaning against the cold railing, he finally answered the call.
“Andrew.” Though Aaron’s voice was clear, Andrew could hear faint music in the background.
“Aaron,” He replied.
It was silent for a few moments. Andrew could feel Aaron sorting through his words, carefully figuring out what exactly to say.
“Happy birthday. I know it doesn’t really matter to you but I wanted to call anyway.”
Andrew hummed. “Same to you,”
The silence stretched for a little longer. To Andrew, it felt reassuring somehow, instead of being uncomfortable or awkward.
“So Katelyn and some of our friends from class planned a surprise party for me. It wasn’t completely terrible. The cake was a sugary monstrosity though. I told her I wasn’t you.”
Andrew became amused. “You would’ve enjoyed seeing the cake Neil attempted to bake. It was almost inedible.”
“That idiot can’t cook for shit.”
Andrew snorted in something like assent.
It felt stupidly normal. Easy. Exchanging small tidbits and anecdotes from their lives they thought the other would find amusing. Following the pattern of their other phone calls.
“Oh, I’ve gotta go. I think my friends are looking for me.”
“You ditched your own birthday party to call me? I’m honoured.” Andrew felt the strange urge to smirk, even though Aaron couldn’t see him.
“Whatever, dickhead.”
Andrew huffed in amusement then it was silent once more. Aaron seemed to be debating whether to say something else. Waiting patiently, Andrew turned so he could see inside the apartment. He watched Neil play with Sir in their warmly lit lounge room.
“Andrew?”
Aaron interpreted Andrew’s silence as meaning he was listening.
“I’m glad ...” Aaron trailed off, choosing his words with care. “You— you’re okay, right? Life is good?”
Through the glass, Neil’s eyes met Andrew’s, an easy smile settling on his features. He lifted Sir onto his lap and using a hand, made her wave a tiny paw at Andrew. Neil grinned, effusive and pleased when Andrew decided to indulge him, raising a brow and lazily waving back. Feeling warm all over, Andrew considered Aaron’s words. Life is good.
He hummed in agreement. “Something like that.”
Winter —
Andrew leaned against the wall, nursing a beer, and let the sounds of the party rush over him like water. Nicky’s electropop thrummed through the speaker he had insisted on bringing. Beside him, Renee tapped a fingernail against her cup in time to the beat.
“I can’t believe it’s taken this long for all of us to visit you and Neil,” Renee said, meeting Andrew’s eyes. “Your apartment is lovely.”
As a rule, Andrew hated small talk but when it came to Renee, he generally made an exception. Also he hadn’t seen her in a while and possibly missed her. Or something like that.
“Everyone’s busy. You’ve been overseas for most of the year,” Andrew pointed out. His eyes lingered over Renee’s hair. The dye had been completely grown out, due to her being unable to retouch it while volunteering in the Peace Corps. Now, her hair was her natural dark brown. It was somewhat disconcerting.
“Maybe in the new year that can change,” Renee said, gaze drifting from Andrew to the television. The foxes had turned it on to tune into the countdown in Times Square. At the moment, Nicky was heckling a particularly awful performance. Beside him, Kevin was clearly trying to stifle his laughter.
Andrew sipped his beer. He could admit it was nice having the Foxes over. With the exception of Kevin and Matt, who had visited Andrew and Neil a handful of times, none of the foxes had been to their apartment before. All of them had instantly fallen in love with Sir and King.
Currently, Matt was positioning the cats on Neil’s lap and pulling out his phone to take photos. King was giving Matt her characteristic unimpressed glare, while Sir seemed to be soaking up the attention. Neil let out a long-suffering sigh. Adorable, Matt muttered as he crouched on the floor snapping multiple photos, making Neil dramatically roll his eyes.
Andrew was unable to stop the tiny smile that graced his lips. Perhaps feeling the weight of his stare, Neil glanced up, meeting Andrew’s eyes. His gaze slowly drifted down, landing on Andrew’s faint smile. Neil’s cheeks flushed pink. Andrew raised a brow, vaguely embarrassed that Neil had caught him yet pleased by response he had drawn out of him.
“Staring,” He mouthed. Neil instantly collected himself and winked at him, sending Andrew a disarming smile of his own. Now Andrew felt his ears burn against his will.
“I’ll be right back,” He said roughly to Renee, who had been watching the silent exchange from behind her cup with a smirk.
Andrew sought out the balcony, not caring that it was freezing outside. He slid the door shut, cutting off the music and laughter with a dull thud.
Slowly, he exhaled into the cold wintry night. He tilted his head up to see snow drifting down, letting it delicately fall onto his face. It was quiet, peaceful — Andrew let himself enjoy the feeling.
The silence was broken when the door slid open behind him, letting out a spill of thumping bass. For a few seconds, noises from the party filtered out into the night, then the door was gently closed. Neil joined him at the balcony.
“Are you trying to die from hypothermia?” He said, sounding incredulous. Neil had bundled up in a thick jumper and beanie, cheeks now flushed from the cold. Andrew tried to ignore how endearing the sight was.
Neil handed Andrew a woolly coat and waited for him to pull it on. Then he leaned forward and wrapped a scarf around Andrew’s neck and tugged a beanie onto his head. As he pulled away, he was unable to resist pressing a quick kiss to Andrew’s cheek. Andrew muttered a quiet thank you.
“Why’d you leave the party?” Neil asked, leaning against the balcony. Snowflakes had fallen onto his auburn hair. Andrew reached forwards to brush them off, letting his fingers gently comb through Neil’s floppy fringe. He felt his heart stutter at the sweet smile Neil gave him.
“You were annoying me,” Andrew told him bluntly, dropping his hand. Neil burst out laughing.
“Sure, Andrew,” Neil said, sounding like he didn’t believe him for a second.
A gust of wintry air blew over them, making Neil retreat into his jumper like a tortoise. The cold stung Andrew’s cheeks. He was suddenly incredibly grateful for the extra layers Neil had given him.
“Shit, it’s fucking freezing,” Neil laughed. He hugged himself, tucking his hands under his arms for extra warmth.
“Do you want to go inside? We might miss the countdown,” Andrew didn’t really care, but Neil might want to be inside with the Foxes when the clock hit midnight. He checked his phone. It was 11:52 pm.
“Not really. The countdown doesn’t matter,” Neil’s bright eyes met Andrew’s gaze. “I’d rather be out here with you, anyway.”
Andrew’s cheeks warmed. Neil and his fucking honesty. Grinning, Neil stepped towards him. This close, Andrew saw the familiar smattering of freckles on his nose, slightly faded from the weaker winter sun. He suddenly felt weak.
“Can I kiss you?” Neil asked, want colouring his voice.
Andrew grabbed his jumper and dragged him over to the corner of the balcony, out of the foxes direct line of sight. Neil’s smile turned amused.
“Now you can.”
Neil leaned forwards and kissed him eagerly, arms reaching up to gently tangle behind Andrew’s neck. Finally. Andrew’s hands fell to Neil’s waist as he sighed. Though Neil’s lips were cold, his mouth was hot, warming Andrew thoroughly until he had forgotten about the winter chill or the gentle snowfall around them. Andrew’s world narrowed down to Neil, Neil, Neil.
Untwining his hands behind Andrew’s neck, Neil brought a hand down to tenderly cup Andrew’s cheek. He pressed a final, lingering kiss and then pulled away, letting his fingers trace delicately over Andrew’s skin. A snowflake fell onto Neil’s pinked nose. Andrew felt like he was dreaming.
He tilted his head and met Neil’s lips in a slow kiss once more, just because he could. Andrew sighed as they separated. Neil pressed a soft kiss to Andrew’s cheek then buried his head in the junction where Andrew’s neck met his shoulder. Andrew enclosed Neil gently in his arms, pulling him even closer.
“‘Drew?” Neil murmured against his neck after a few moments of blissful quiet.
“Yeah, Neil?”
“I want to tell you something,” He started, quiet but sure, “And you don’t have to say anything, alright? I just want you to know.”
Neil lifted his head from Andrew’s neck so their eyes could meet. His face was still flushed a pleasant pink.
“Okay,” Andrew said, voice low. Privately, his mind reeled through an infinite number of possibilities, as he anticipated what Neil had to say.
A breathless moment. Then: “I love you.”
Andrew blinked at Neil. He blinked at him again. Neil’s gaze was earnest yet unwavering, his lips pink and kiss-bitten, snowflakes still delicately falling onto his hair. I love you. Andrew always thought those words weren’t meant for someone like him and yet, somehow, something about this moment felt right. Everything about it felt right. He felt a perfect and comforting warmth envelop him, like slowly sinking into a hot bath.
Unable to stop himself, he brought his hands up on either side Neil’s face and kissed him soundly. Neil made a surprised noise into Andrew’s mouth. When they pulled away, he rolled his eyes at the dumbfounded expression on Neil’s face.
“Apparently you really do need everything spelt out for you,” Andrew said, amused. “I love you too, idiot.”
“Oh,” Neil exhaled, a pleased smile stealing over his face. His features softened. He looked suddenly young, radiant. Andrew almost couldn’t bear the overwhelmingly fond look in Neil’s eyes — like he was giving up his heart to Andrew and trusting him to keep it safe.
Andrew felt his lips curve in an unbidden smile of his own. Neil’s eyelashes fluttered as he let out another weak oh, lifting a gentle hand to cup Andrew’s face. His thumb softly brushed Andrew’s bottom lip. The feeling that he was dreaming came back to Andrew in a rush.
Out of nowhere, his mind recalled Bee’s words. Life is comprised of seasons. Bee really was too wise for her own good, Andrew thought to himself absentmindedly.
“I think the countdown started,” Neil murmured. He was right — even through the glass, Andrew could hear the Foxes elated shouts, the exhilaration colouring their mixed voices as they counted down.
“Three!”
Neil met Andrew’s gaze. There was something wonderfully alive in his brilliant blue eyes.
“Two!”
Andrew felt higher than the stars, struck by the exhilaration and terror and joy in feeling.
“One!”
They tipped forward, tilted heads, inexplicably drawn together like they always had been.
“Happy New Year!”
Andrew kissed Neil like he would never tire of it, wondering if it was even possible to tire of the feeling of Neil, warm and familiar, melted against him. He heard fireworks in the freezing, snowy night around them, felt identical fireworks in his heart. Delicate snowflakes continued to drift around them, but Andrew was oblivious to the cold, oblivious to everything but Neil. Somewhere inside him, he felt perfect, golden sunlight warm his entire being.
If life was comprised of seasons, he wanted to bask in this one forever.