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Tony wasn’t sure if he was relieved or devastated when he learned Steve got dusted. There was a lot he wanted to say to him, and saying it without him there was not quite the same, though still quite satisfying. Collapsing after might have ruined the whole dramatic effect a bit, but it felt good to just let it out.
It felt... cleansing. Like acceptance too. Like Tony was finally ready to move on.
So much has changed and yet when it all came down to it he felt almost... good. The apocalypse happened and three billion people died but the team, or what was left of it, was back together and seemed determined not to give up. It felt like the team. He had his Brucie back, and Pepper and Rhodey were still fine, and Nat, and even Thor was there. There was also his new space android friend, the glowing savior who seemed to have a lot of sexual tension going on with Rhodey while also trying to track her own wife to check if she got dusted, and there was Bucky.
Because of course just because Steve got dusted, didn’t mean Bucky did.
And Bucky was... something else.
Tony tried hard to hate Bucky Barnes when he first learned the truth about his parents but even as he looked in his eyes still in the bunker he couldn’t find it in himself. Steve was the one who was too cowardly to speak the truth and Barnes was still a shell of a man who had nothing but a fight or flight instinct on his side. And then J.A.R.V.I.S. told him that it was Barnes who alerted the meager leftovers of team Iron Man, as Rhodey used to joke before it all got out of hand, that Tony was dying in Siberia.
Barnes was... not what Tony expected.
Barnes introduced himself officially with an apology and suddenly, he was Bucky.
When the team went to find Thanos, Bucky stayed by Tony’s side, because someone had to, and because Bucky was the least willing to fight. Bucky was apparently very tired of fighting in general, Tony soon learned.
And then the team came back, without the stones, and without good news, and everything changed.
***
Morgan was Tony’s best decision, and Tony admittedly didn’t make that many of those.
After Peter and Harley, because Tony hoped at least Harley... but Mrs. Keener answered her phone, and she was crying. And just like that, Tony was alone again and he suddenly realized that he didn’t have to be. And that he deserved his happiness, he deserved his child, his dream, and to make some little kid’s future better.
Yes, he was still miserably single, and it didn’t look like he wouldn’t be anytime soon, but these days, it didn’t matter. Not like it ever did, to a man with his money and influence but after three billion people disappeared... well, quite a lot of them have been parents.
And quite a lot of them could never come back, even if what Thanos did could somehow be undone.
Because nothing could undo empty cars running over people, planes falling from the sky and every single tragedy caused by people who got dusted. Not a single body that was still there could ever come back to life the way some still hoped those dusted would.
So Tony took his chance. The world was different and maybe now the smaller things mattered. No matter how advanced, his armor wasn’t enough in the end. But Tony, the man inside it, he could help a little bit with the aftermath. Stark Industries, Maria Stark Foundation and Potts-Hogans now were working hard to put money and resources where they could change things, and Tony bought a house and decided to retire.
Not like there was much to be retiring from anyway.
Natasha was in Wakanda, because Okoye was in Wakanda, and Natasha was a smitten fool. Thor was off trying to establish New Asgardia and pretend he didn’t miss Loki. Rocket and Nebula decided to stay in the compound and Bruce decided to stay with them, tired of running and ready to face reality. The three of them still had open invitations to pop in for a visit whenever since they were the closest. Rhodey was off in Louisiana coordinating space rescue with his new... something and her surviving daughter, and they knew Clint survived but no one could find him.
Everyone was off somewhere and Tony wasn’t sure where he belonged in all of it, except maybe with Bruce and Nebula (and the genius raccoon, God, space was weird) except the Compound felt too alien and unfriendly.
So Tony went and build himself and Morgan a life.
And Bucky came with them.
Bucky technically still had a standing invitation and a hut with some goats in Wakanda, but after everything, he went through he really missed the motherland. And there wasn’t anywhere else to go, was there. Tony offered, both to buy him a place, maybe a small apartment in Brooklyn, maybe Steve’s old place, and of course his own door. Except he never thought Bucky would accept that last offer. And Bucky did.
Tony was glad.
No, he was happy.
Because the apocalypse had come but the world didn’t end and life went on and Tony finally accepted it. Thanos achieved his goal and they all had to welcome this new reality. And after five years had passed, Tony felt settled in this strange new world.
He and Bucky became really good friends.
Especially at the beginning, when the whole situation was still new, hearts still broken and Morgan small enough she cried more than slept, they had spent a lot of sleepless nights talking, crying more often than not and coming to terms with certain things.
The disarming honesty they offered each other in those conversations cemented their relationship in a way that felt he hadn’t had since... possibly never. He wasn’t sure he was ever even that open with Rhodey. Rhodey usually tended to read what was on Tony’s mind instead of Tony telling him.
Bucky was a huge help too. Being a single father to a baby girl had proven quite a task, even if Tony had never felt better about being shit at something and having to learn how to do it. Learning how to be a parent was the most amazing journey he had ever embarked on and he was so incredibly grateful for Morgan, even if the circumstances that led him to this point were more than tragic.
“Come on, my little witch, it’s dinnertime!”
Tony went to fetch his little troublemaker while Bucky set the table inside to keep the bug out of being interested in lasagna and overly sweet peach ice tea that was Bucky’s patented recipe (he swore he learned it from his ma, but it used a lot of actual fresh peaches so Tony was skeptic) and that Morgan loved.
It was a peaceful, beautiful day. Warm and sunny, which was why Morgan was playing outside, safe in their huge garden-forest, Bucky only occasionally checking if she didn’t come to close to the lake while Tony cooked.
Tony grabbed his shrieking daughter around the waist, turning her upside down and carrying her inside while she laughed. He had no idea where she found the helmet, he was so sure he kept the armors safely hidden, but he couldn’t help the way he was both scared and proud when he saw her in it. She was his personal superhero already, that girl.
“Come on, baby girl. Sit down and dig in.”
Tony smiled as Morgan run up to take her place at the table next to Bucky who ruffled her hair. He tried to ignore the way his heart skipped a beat at the sight of the two of them, the domesticity and closeness they had built over the past five years filled with awkward tension of growing feelings for a while now.
Tony was almost sure Bucky felt the same, the gazes they shared meaningful and strange and wonderful these days, but...
Almost.
Almost was definitely not enough for Tony to say anything, and make things weird. Well, weirder than they already were, when your friend, who was taken out of time, killed your parents and had been brainwashed and tortured for seventy years, was living with you and your daughter after the apocalypse happened and forced you to retire from your life as a superhero.
“Can you pour me some tea, papa?”
Tony’s head jerked up from his plate, unsure if he was hearing things right. But there she was, his beautiful girl, looking at Bucky who chocked on his own drink, and seemed unsure how to answer before he caught himself and poured her a glass with a weak smile before turning a hesitant, confused look at Tony. Bucky seemed... happy, that for sure, but also worried as if he didn’t know if he didn’t overstep.
Tony wanted to laugh.
Except before a word could be said about everything, a knock on the door interrupted them, Bucky’s surprise immediately turning into concern. They didn’t exactly get guests often, not to mention someone coming would have to know how to unlock the gate. (It was not, actually, electronic Stark wonder. The latch was just a bit broken and you needed to know how to do it.) It meant it was probably some of their friends, except they tended to always announce themselves...
Tony grabbed the phone out of his pocket and sighed in relief.
“It’s fine. I’ll go open, it’s Nat.”
“Nat?”
Bucky’s eyes said it all. If Nat was here instead of in Wakanda, then something was happening.
“You make sure that little enchantress here makes her dinner disappear and I’ll be back in a moment.”
He winked at Morgan and sent Bucky a reassuring smile before going out to meet Nat on the porch. Her face spoke volumes about the seriousness of the situation and... Scott Lang was standing next to her. Fuck.
“You’re. Alive.”
“Yes, well, that’s the thing.”
Tony sat down and listened as Scott prattled about the quantum realm and his idea. Tony could already feel a headache coming (or growing, it had come in a black SUV about an hour ago with Tony’s Natashalie by his side) just thinking about what he was suggesting.
“Quantum fluctuation messes with the Planck scale, which then triggers the Deutsch proposition. Can we agree on that? In Layman’s terms, it means you’re not coming home.”
“I did.”
Tony bit on his fist to keep himself from punching Scott. Natasha probably wouldn’t mind but it was setting bad example for Morgan.
“No. You accidentally survived. It’s a billion to one cosmic fluke.”
Nat looked at him and Tony really didn’t like that look.
“That’s what Bruce said.”
“See! Thank him. That’s because Bruce is a very smart man.”
“He also said if anyone can stabilize a fluke, it’s you.”
Tony cursed under his breath. Fuck you, Brucie-bear.
“Tony...”
“I’m sorry.”
***
I love you three thousand.
Tony went downstairs, marveling at this amazing girl he put to sleep, thinking hard about everything he was doing before she caught him swearing. The model was still open at the table in the living room when he entered as if mocking him.
He sat down heavily on the couch next to Bucky, accepting the mug of tea offered to him with a weak smile.
“Not that it’s a competition but she loves me three thousand. You are somewhere in the low six to nine hundred range.”
Bucky smiled.
“Does she now? It’s not a competition, Tony. You’re her dad. Of course she loves you more.”
Tony wanted to swallow his words suddenly.
“It’s not a measurable quantity anyway, you know. Love doesn’t work like that. And... And by that logic, you should be somewhere around there too, shouldn’t you be?”
Their eyes met, the memory of the dinner fresh in their mind, in some ways so much more groundbreaking event of the day than Natasha’s and Scott’s visit.
“I’m sorry about that, I don’t know why--”
“She called you papa, Buckaroo. There’s nothing to apologize for, maybe we should even wonder why it took her so long. She’s always had two parents, didn’t she? Just two... oblivious parents.”
Bucky swallowed, avoiding his gaze.
“Oblivious, hmm? Maybe.” He paused, as if not sure how to continue, before hesitantly bringing his gaze up to meet Tony’s. “Maybe we should talk about it sometime.”
“Maybe we should.” So it wasn’t just Tony’s imagination. “Maybe we should talk about it later. After...”
He stumbled over his words, the weight of everything suddenly crushing on him. He buried his face in his mug, trying to escape reality, and as he sipped the tea, it also ended on his nose. Bucky laughed at him, brushing it off, before sitting back again, ready to listen attentively.
“I figured it out.”
“You mean...”
“Time travel, yeah. Shit.”
“Hey. No swearing or we’ll run out of pops for you to bribe Morgan with. The dentist got dusted, she can’t eat too many sweets.”
Tony laughed, a bit watery and weak but doing wonder to break the tension in the room and in his muscles. He grabbed the blanket and buried himself in it as if trying to physically build barriers between himself and the world. Like he always did. Like with the armor.
“I can’t save everyone.”
He turned his pleading gaze at Bucky as if wishing his words could change the reality. Except nothing could, and Bucky certainly wouldn’t be the one to try.
“Seems to me like you can.”
Tony sighed, putting his mug on the table and leaning forward, resting his forehead on Bucky’s shoulder. He would like to get used to this. He didn’t want to fight again. To try again and risk failure again. He had his second chance, his Morgan, his Bucky, and he didn’t want to lose them.
Except...
“What about Morgan?”
“We’ll leave Morgan with Pepper and Happy and when we save the world she’ll still be there, and we’ll take Peter and Harley and Steve to meet her.” It was like Bucky could read Tony’s mind, all his darkest fears. “We won’t save the past for the price of the present. We’ll get all or nothing.”
And Tony nodded.
“All or nothing. Okay. Okay...”
***
Apparently Clint was alive and at the compound. So there was that. Tony tried to meet Natasha’s eyes all through the meeting but she avoided him and basically everyone, looking like she desperately wished Okoye was there. He didn’t blame her. They all already lost so much and he knew how close Natasha and Clint once were but the man who came back... that was not the same Clint.
He silently worked with Bruce, thankful for the way the other scientist could offer him space when he needed it like always, and trying not to think about what Nebula told him about Vormir and Natasha’s decision to go retrieve the soul stone with Clint. He tried hard to think about another solution, something other than the obvious sacrifice on Natasha’s mind.
But he couldn’t.
They split into teams. He, Bucky, Bruce and Scott to New York, in 2012, searching for the space stone, mind stone, and time stone. Thor and Rocket looking for aether in Jane in 2013. Rhodey and Nebula in 2014, trying to get the power stone before Quill or... well, Nebula, got to it. Tony really hoped nothing went wrong there because he knew Nebula and he knew she was a formidable opponent. But she had his honey bear with her and he hoped they would both be okay. He needed them both to be okay.
Natasha and Clint... He hoped he would get to see them both yet. He wasn’t sure about this new Clint, had no idea what happened to him but he didn’t want him to die. Not for Clint’s sake and not for Natasha’s.
And then... then it was time.
***
Tony really hoped Bruce had more luck with the time stone because, for the three of them, everything went to shit. Starting with Loki stealing the Tesseract (though Thor would like to know that, later, maybe the timeline this created would be kinder to his brother) and ending with then-Tony and Hulk exiting the staircase and running straight into Bucky and Tony with the scepter. Tony never wanted to piss Hulk off again.
Bucky got them out in the end but they didn’t have the stones, even if Tony managed to warn himself about Pierce, desperately hoping maybe it would help uproot HYDRA and save Bucky a bit earlier. And then... Then they found a way to try and fix it, except it involved going to Camp Leigh in 1970...
But they did it. They did it, and Tony felt so grateful for getting to hug Peggy one more time and God, it was probably more messing than they were allowed but watching Bucky punch Howard and tell Jarvis to take care of baby Tony was the hottest thing Tony had ever seen.
So the moment they were back in present, Tony grabbed Bucky and pulled him into a kiss and Bucky kissed Bucky and Tony thought that this... this was good.
“Talk later?”
“Talk later and kiss more later.”
He turned around, looking at the rest, checking the headcount. Bruce, and Scott, and Thor and Rocket were also there, and Rhodey and Nebula... and Natasha... and Clint, oh God. Clint was there and they had the soul stone.
“Who did you sacrifice for that shiny rock?”
“Schmidt.”
Natasha smirked and Bucky blinked at her.
“Wait, as in--”
“Yeah, well, turns out it was soul for a soul, not necessarily someone you love.”
“God, Stevie will want to hear that.”
And Bucky laughed, and Tony laughed with him, bright and a bit manic, adrenaline leaving him, but relieved and hopeful for the first time.
“Well, then let’s go get Steve back.”
And they did get Steve back, got everyone back, as they found out when Coulson called Clint (so that was why Clint went on a murder spree, okay, Agent Agent did need to get rid of that habit of dying and coming back) except then everything went to shit, and it turned out Nebula wasn’t Tony’s Nebula and Thanos - not their Thanos, the 2014 Thanos, apparently, was there...
It was a shitshow.
But Peter was there, and Strange was there and oh God... The stones... The one chance. Hulk already barely survived wielding the gauntlet and Bruce was so weak he barely survived the collapse. There was no way Tony could wield the gauntlet and survive, was there?
14,000,605 futures.
And they could only win if Tony wielded the stones.
14,000,605 futures and Morgan would only have one if Tony didn’t.
At least she would have Bucky.
“I am... Iron Man.”
***
Their house has never been so crowded. It was a good thing that Tony, being Tony, bought a way too big space with too many guest bedrooms because they still had enough people there were a few air mattresses on the floor.
Pepper and Happy were already there, opting to take a break from the city and their busy life to stay with Morgan at home, where she would feel comfortable. Peter and Harley were there, which meant May and Mrs. Keener (who were getting along spectacularly) and Harley’s sister.
Okoye stayed, because Nat stayed, and Shuri stayed because she wanted to stick around Stark Tech and Bruce’s brain and T’Challa also wanted to stay but he had to go back to Nakia and ruling a country that was trying to adapt to sudden population change yet again. Bruce was obviously around, and Nebula who acted a bit like she planned to move in, and Bucky still wasn’t sure if she didn’t.
Clint left to return the stones and didn’t come back, a letter with his and Coulson’s honeymoon picture explaining he went to get his second chance coming back instead.
Steve stayed, and he and Sam shared a bedroom, officially because there was no space, but Bucky had some suspicions. Stephen officially stayed to talk some stuff out about science and magic but Bucky could tell he was a bit shaken by the whole ordeal and needed to stay.
And Rhodey, of course, who already had his own bedroom at the house, that was now very crowded, because Maria was back, and it was Carol, Maria, Rhodey and Monica now. Who, as Rhodey learned, was actually his biological daughter. There was a lot to unpack there.
Bucky himself ended up staying with Morgan because his bedroom was the one Steve and Sam shared (and oh God, if Bucky was right, he may tell them to keep the bed) and Tony’s bedroom was not an option.
Because Tony was still recovering.
Wielding the gauntlet... Took a lot out of him. He shouldn’t have survived, Strange saw him die after saving the world, but somehow, against everything, against the very fate, Tony held on. Never let it be said that Tony Stark didn’t defy all expectations. He survived, even if he lost the arm, even if he was weak and in a coma for the first week, he was still beautifully, gloriously alive.
And Bucky has never been more grateful for anything.
Their house was full of people who cared, who needed to see Tony wake up and get back to himself, needed reassurance that everything would be okay, but they would get it. It would take some time but eventually, Tony would sit at the table with them.
They all didn’t need hope anymore. They had an amazing, tangible reality.
***
His left hand didn’t tremble.
Tony stared at it long and hard after he dropped the screwdriver but it stayed still, perfectly fine. Maybe, after all, it was psychosomatic. God, only he would finally feel better after losing an arm in the apocalypse. It was ridiculous. He didn’t mind.
He leaned down and retrieved the offending tool, happy to not have lost a balance. Turns out, suddenly being without a limb took some adjusting. The first few days were hell. Not just because he was suddenly dumped into a new reality of the difficulty that came with being disabled, but because he had to do it with his house full.
But he got it. He could see people needed to see for himself that he came out fine. Stephen Strange hugged him. It was alright. But when most of them finally cleared out to go home (Rhodey had a daughter. Biologically. Oh, honey bear, Tony would be getting the full story someday.) Tony couldn’t pretend he didn’t breath a sigh of relief.
Nebula stayed. They didn’t talk about it, she just sort of moved in without asking, at least for the time being and Tony was secretly glad. Bruce wanted to hang around but then Betty Ross contacted him, freshly undusted, and that was all they saw of him. Mrs. Keener took her daughter back home but allowed Harley to stay, along with Peter and May. And the rest was mostly close by in New York or just a few hours by a Stark jet away.
It was good. Having just enough people around to feel safe but not enough to feel crowded.
Having Bucky’s warm body in his own bed.
Oh, they talked. There weren’t too many words involved, but just enough. Not much needs to be said after you lived and raised a daughter together for five years. Tony wondered, sometimes, if they shouldn’t have realized earlier. If they could have shared everything for months, if not years. Except the way it happened, maybe it had to be that way. They had a solid basis for a relationship already. And slipping into more was so incredibly natural. And now, now they knew not to waste a second.
“Hey, handsome.”
Tony smiled, turning around in the chair and accepting a kiss Bucky offered him.
“I told you to come get me or someone if you need help.”
“I don’t need help. I’m just adding finishing touches. Pete mounted it securely on the table for me, one arm is enough.”
Bucky raised an eyebrow but nodded at him. And it was, true, mostly. It was not exactly easy and would take time getting used to... but Tony finished it. On the table lay a prosthetic not unlike Bucky’s, a project he, Peter, Harley and Shuri worked on together, except his was in dark red because Tony was a dramatic bitch and not afraid to say it.
“Now I can say I’m Iron Man even out of the armour.” He smiled. “There’s even some actually iron bits, not only gold-titanium.”
Bucky laughed and kissed him again.
“When will you install it?”
“Bruce, Betty, Stephen and Helen are coming tomorrow. Say, don’t you ever miss the days it was just the three of us here? It seems a bit crowded ever since our friends got this weird protective streak, I have no idea why...”
Because you almost died. Hung unsaid between them.
“You know you secretly love it.”
***
Getting used to not having an arm was a bitch. Turns out getting used to having a robot arm though, was apparently also a bitch.
It was good that he had Bucky though. Bucky was a lot of help. The three of them made it work, making even more of a home than before. Morgan calling Bucky papa was an everyday occurrence rather than a life-changing event and Tony running metal fingers through her hair had become as natural as running his normal fingers was before.
He and Bucky matched now, he liked to joke, Tony missing his right arm and Bucky his left.
And eventually, they even got matching rings to complete the arms.
Morgan, of course, was the flower girl.
And they all lived happily ever after.
