Archive of Our Own

If Jimin would’ve known then what he knows now . . . well fuck, he still would’ve done it. For him at least.

For Him.

365 days

It's wrong. All of it is just so fucking wrong.

'We're really sorry to inform you that you've been removed from the dance team. It was a hard decision to make for cutbacks, but we feel as if -,’

Jimin doesn't read the rest of the message from his phone that was sent just an hour ago, tears in his eyes yet he's not sure if it's from the text or because of the other shitty things that happened today. He's still in his uniform, which is covered in dirt now from being thrown down and his arm is throbbing in pain. Jimin's pretty sure he's bruising, but he doesn't bother to check - he just knows it's bruised, and there's nothing he can do about it. 

He had just gotten thrown out into the street, literally, by his boss as he was called degrading names that ranged from 'a tease' to 'low life whore'. The same man who's harassed Jimin and continued to make comments on his ass and body for the past year has decided to fire Jimin - for denying him a one night stand. Jimin tries to stand up for himself, tries to say that he doesn't date the people he works with, that he doesn't want to be with anyone. He doesn't get to because there;s a bruising grip on his arm that's simply dragging him out before harshly shoving him to the ground. Then Jimin is left there like dirt - because he really is nothing than dirt. 

Jimin had turned his phone on to order a ride or look up bus times when he sees the message. The tears of anger start to rise, and with a frustrate conscious, he decides to walk home. He doesn't care that it's ten at night, he doesn't care that it's practically freezing - he needs this walk to cool off because he's not sure how much more he can handle. 

Oh, but life likes to play cruel, sick jokes.

 Jimin had spoke too soon because when he arrives to his apartment complex, he sees a pink slip that's taped to the door, begging for attention. It's an eviction notice. What's even worse is that he doesn't even bother to get riled up, considering the fact that he's been fired from his job, and doesn't even try to talk to his landlord to negotiate more days to pay the rent. There's no point in making such a promise when he can't fulfill it. So fuck it. 

Really - fuck it.

Because once Jimin enters his tiny apartment, the smell that greets him at the front door is downright awful. He wrinkles his nose in distaste, eyes darting around his place because something's off. It's . . . It's too quiet. It then that he realizes the absence of small yapping. Where was his cute little puppy that usually ran up to him with his tiny legs and greeted him at the door every time he came back home? Why was it so quiet?

His heart drops and his stomach twists in such an unpleasant way, like it knows something bad is about to happen, and it doesn't settle well with Jimin. He decides to close the door, toeing off his shoes as he does before walking in further.

"Mocha? Baby, where are you?" He says softly before whistling. She always responds to the noise, whether its a high pitched bark or running to Jimin. But it doesn't work, not this time. He's hoping that she's just hiding because she accidentally peed on the carpet instead of using her puppy pads. Though, that's not exactly the smell that hangs in the air. 

Jimin decides to start looking. He begins to look at the most obvious places - like under the chairs and table, under the couches and his bed, even in the closet. Then he starts to look in cabinets, look under the sink and even behind the bookcase. Jimin's heart is beating fast upon not being able to find the small dog, and when he enter the living room to begin checking there his heart drops. He doesn't know how he failed to notice this before, but the T.V. . . It's -,

Well, let's just say the sight of a fallen T.V. and Jimin's puppy isn't a nice one. 

Jimin's breath gets caught in his throat, eyes widening as he tries to back away fast -way too fast apparently because he's suddenly tripping over one of Mocha's toys. Tears rise to his eyes and little by little his world is crashing down. His head feels light - too light, and his chest is tightening uncomfortably so much that it hirts.  and it feels like something is stuck in his throat. He lets out a piercing sob that racks his whole body, as if it'll relieve the pain he's feeling. 

He reaches into his pocket, hands shakey and vision blurry as he dials a certain number. It doesn't go through the first time, only because he didn't dial it correctly, but the second time it does. And one ring later, Kim Taehyung is picking up the phone. 

"Jimin? Look, it's  kinda late and I have a really big test tomorrow that - woah, hey, why are you crying? Chim what's wrong?" Taehyung already sounds worried, and Jimin can hear rustling in the background that indicates he's probably sitting up in bed now. 

"I-I, I lost my job and - Taehyung, Mocha she, she," He starts to cry hard again, body quivering as the image of his poor puppy is permanently etched into his mind. Taehyung's saying something, but for some reason Jimin can't understand him, he's overworking himself and shutting everything out.

"Jiminie, stay right where you are, okay? I'm coming over right now." Taehyung's voice is soft, slow, and clear as he repeats the statement a few times to let Jimin process his words. He stays on the line the whole time, either trying to comfort Jimin or decipher his words as he babbled nonsense while crying. Taehyung doesn't even has a clue of everything that's happened, but all he knows is that he needs to be by his best friends 

Taehyung hangs up on him the moment he opens the door, and his nose scrunches just like Jimin had. The only difference is when he walks towards his friend, he spots it. His eyes widen as he curses under his breath. He instantly grabs the blanket from the couch, throwing it over the scene for now because what else can he really do? He then moves to help Jimin up, holding him close as he takes him to the room and away from the sight. 

"Okay, okay Min," Taehyugn whispers as he sits Jimin down on the bed, just holding him close. Taehyung's feels so helpless, he doesn't know how to help because - well shit, the poor man's dog just died. Jimin loved her like she was his child, and his best friends heart aches seeing the other like this. 

"Taehyung I-I didn't, I can't," Jimin cries once more, shaking his head in dismay as they sit on the bed, Taehyung letting him get it all out. He can't imagine what pain Jimin might be going through, so he lets him do whatever might help relieve even a little bit of that pain. "I-I can't stay here. Taehyung I have to go, I can't be here."

"Okay, that's okay Min. You can come over to my apartment for awhile. I mean, Yoongi finally finished moving all his stuff out so you can take his room for now." Taehyung mumbles. Jimin knows Taehyung doesn't understand everything, but for now, he decides just to go with the flow. So much has happened that he doesn't even want to talk about the pain. 

They're packing in another half an hour, Jimin getting all his things as Taehyung gets on the phone. He's trying to quietly explain the incident in the living room, asking if someone can come clean it up. When Jimin's done, Taehyung gently grabs his hand, leading him out the apartment. By the time they're in the car, Jimin's no longer crying, his eyes too dry. His face is just puffy and flushed, pink eyes and stuffy nose and he feels as shitty as the day is. 

358 days

Jimin's settled into Yoongi's old room. It's bare and plain, looking a bit depressing - definitely not what Jimin needs right now considering everything that's happened. He has his laptop open, trying to get his mind off of everything and distract himself with school work. Only, there's an email that stops him from doing so, and he can feel the life draining out of him. 

He's been kicked out from one of his classes, his major of all things, due to his lack of attendance. It's utter bullshit! He turns in all of his assignments, he does well on all his tests, and he even does any type of extra credit the professors. So why was he failing? Why was his attendance being the thing that's holding him back? Jimin just screams in frustration, shoving his laptop off his lap and across the bed as hot tears come to his eyes again. He's crying. 

He's crying because he's so frustrated. He doesn't even want to cry but apparently his body doesn't really care what he wants - it's just happening. His mind is starting to realize that how fucked up his life is. He has no job, no future career to accelerate in. He has no home, and he can't even keep his fucking dog-

"Jiminie? Hey uh, I heard something. Can I come in?" Taehyung's voice is suddenly pressent from the other side of the door. Jimin sniffled, but keeps quiet as he decides to ignore his friend. He just wants to be alone. He just wants to be by himself so he can be angry at the world. "Chim? Are you awake?" the voice comes again, and after a minute of silence Taehyung's footsteps could be heard less and less until he's gone. 

Jimin can't do this. He can't do it - he can't do this anymore. He pulls his laptop up and on his lap, fingers gliding as the pain in his chest becomes more and more. It's to the point where it makes his throat tighten and causes him to feel so tired. He's done, with everything. Jimin doesn't think he can take any more pain that life wants to give him. 

Jimin knows that if he's ever wanted to kill himself, he wouldn't do it himself. No, he's honestly too scare - knows that he would back out at the last second. He's always known in some fucked up way he'd get someone to do it for him. He'd hire someone to do it for him. Like, he would hire and pay someone to kill him. Funny how it works, right?

So with some time after getting through all the suicide hotlines and other advertisements that claim they can help, Jimin finds the perfect website. It's easy, quick, and flexible for Jimin to work with. It lets him see all different type of assassins and their profiles. There's no pictures or any personal information, but Jimin can understand why.

He tries to look for someone who has experience, because if they've done it before they can do it again. He looks for someone who has a wide range of preferences, and someone who guarantees to make it look like an accident. Jimin doesn't really have high standards, but he's pretty picky. He doesn't want to mess this up - he only has one change. 

That's how he stumbles upon a user who meets his qualifications.

User : 08011990sSalinjaTokki

Qualifications : Has completed and killed over forty two people successfully. Has never been caught or suspected. Will assassinate under any circumstances with the exception of the use of electricity of any kind. Will assassinate anyone over the age of 18. Will travel to any part of Asia to complete assassinations. Will do any tasks, no questions asked. Will make the victim suffer if requested. Prolonging an assassination and torture will be charged extra. Will NOT contact after the assassination is completed. Top rated expert at killing people for others.

Preference of Assassination : Prefers to be as quick and clean as possible, but does not mind if it is not.

Highly  Recommended, Top Rated.

Message : Yes   No

Jimin sends a message to the person, who instantly responds and claims that he has a five star rating. He must be good at what he does if he has a perfect five, considering that the people he's killed for are rating him so highly. Especially since he's completed so many cases. Jimin wonders if he's really as good as he seems. There's obviously only one way to find out. 

Jimin goes on to thoroughly explain what he wants. He gives the man a little less than a year to kill him, adding that he can do it any time during that timeline. He makes sure to emphasize that the man can kill as he please with the exception of burning, drowning, and suffocating. He gives the area that he lives at, wanting to add the address but the city should be enough. When he's requested to send a picture, Jimin digs one up from last Christmas. He was so happy, eyes squinted because of how big his smile is while Taehyung makes a selfie sign. 

Jimin makes sure to point out which one is him, he wants the assassin to know. 

Jimin contemplates setting up a schedule for the man so he knows where he is and what he usually does, but he decides against it. the man claims to be a professional assassin, he can figure it out and make his own schedule. Plus, if he did need one, he would just ask Jimin for it. Otherwise, he just puts in his card information, and empty's out everything in his bank account. Money won't be something that matter soon, not when Jimin's no longer here to even enjoy it. 

He doesn't get a name or a face, just a username filled with numbers and letters that are a representation of his killer to conceal his identity. It doesn't bother Jimin, he really doesn't care, as long as the job gets done. When the man confirms that he'll take on the job, it all just sinks in to Jimin's mind and reality hits him hard. 

He just hired an assassin to take his life. 

344 days

Jimin doesn't realize the horrible and stupid mistake he's made until two weeks later. 

He's with Taehyung at some restaurant, waiting for a friend Taehyung had met not too long ago. Jimin begs for the lunch to just be them two, but Taehyung had kept insisting that his new friend would be a great addition to the group. Jimin doesn't really believe him, and continues to silently sulk on his own as he looks at the menu.

He doesn't realize how wrong he is and how fucked he is when Jungkook enters the door. The boy looks so soft and pure and innocent. His smile shows off the cutest bunny teeth and his eyes crunch up in such a way that makes Jimin's cold, dead heart beat. He has a shy aurora to him when he greets himself, and the way he asks if he could sit next to Jimin at the table makes said boy almost melt at how timid he is.

As they eat, Jungkooks eyes widen to express how delicious the food is, and hes not afraid to tease them and make them laugh over time as they get to know each other. He's not afraid to have a good time, not afraid to embarrass himself in order to make others smile. Not afraid to make Jimin happen despite how hard life has been for him. 

Jimin has a deep desire to protect the purity that is showcased from Jungkook. He doesn't want the cruel reality of the world to harm and corrupt Jungkook, doesn't want life to fuck Jungkook over like it did him. He wants to make sure that the cute bunny smile will never have a reason to wipe itself from Jungkook's pretty face, and he has some strange sense of determination to carry through with that wish. 

When they get ready to leave, Jungkook promises to show up more and hang out with them. Jimin slowly, and regretfully, realizes that if Jungkook truly is going to show up daily as he promised, he doesn't have that strong of a need to die. Not anymore, because he's pretty sure that the after life doesn't have Jungkook's smile and soft eyes. 

That night, he goes on his laptop and tries to find the site he was on. It's a bit hard, seeing as he found it on a private tab, but he finds it nonetheless. Though, there still is a downside. Because when he logs onto the site, he can't seem to find the assassin he requested.

He also realizes that he has no contact, at all. And Jimin realizes how fucked he truly is. 

306 days

A lot has happened. And when Jimin says a lot - he means it. 

Jungkook does keep his promise of coming around frequently. He comes on the weekends when the three sit to have movie marathons or to play video games all night. Sometimes they'll go out to eat somewhere nice, while other times they'll simply order takeout and talk about their hardships in life. 

Jungkook gets close with both Taehyung and Jimin, but Jimin thinks he's gotten way closer to the younger than Taehyung has. They hang out alone while Taehyung goes to school or work until he comes back. Jimin has yet to find a job, and he refuses to start school again, so he has plenty of time to spare with the youngest, who only attends college on select days.

Now, Jimin doesn't just sit at home though. He does try to find a job, but it's hard to when your interviewer calls your previous boss and hears lie after lie of what a horrible worker you are. Jimin has yet to find someone to pity him and take him in. It doesn't stop him though, from applying to various places. He doesn't have much hope he'll get offered a job but he has to try. He doesn't like the idea of Taehyung paying rent alone.

Jimin's old apartment is cleared of everything, it has been for awhile. A few days after the incident, he had told Taehyung of the eviction notice. That's all they brought up from that day, not wanting to risk Jimin's emotional state by brining up the damaging events from that day. And Jimin was so grateful for it - grateful enough that he told Taehyung all the basics. No dance team, no job, no home, no pets, and no school. 

Jimin's really hit an all time low. The only good thing is . . Well. .  Jungkook.

Call it cheesy. Call it cliché, but the younger boy makes it better. He makes Jimin forget that his life is shit. Makes Jimin forget the degrading names his former boss used to call him and replaces it with sweet, playful pet names. Makes him forget that he can no longer dance to his passion but instead laugh to his heart's content with the boy. Makes him forget about the sweet, sweet puppy that use to fill up his heart because Jungkook has squeezed into her place. 

But fuck, it doesn't make Jimin forget about the assassin.

He's searched every night to find the man online but he's not there anymore. What's even worse is Jimin's paranoid every time they go out now, so this results with the three of them (or two when Taehyung works late) to stay in. They don't question Jimin's dislike for the outside, content with hanging out and lazing around at the apartment. As long as their together it's fine. 

Jimin wishes he could believe the same thing.

276 days

Jimin and Jungkook are remarkably closer.

The real question is if Jungkook likes Jimin as much as Jimin likes him.

Jimin has grown too fond of the younger, and he knows that he's fallen head over heels for him. He'll do anything to see his pretty smile, will bring lots of blankets and pillows so they can cuddle, will bring snacks home so they can laugh and eat all night. But Jimin . . . he doesn't really think that Jungkook feels the same. 

Sure, Jungkook will hold him super close if he has a sudden plummet in his mood or he's just had a terrible day and feels like crying, but Taehyung does that too. Jungkook will make sure to cuddle Jimin during scary movies, putting his arms around his waist to hold him still every time there's a jump scare, but Taehyung also holds him. Jungkook will even bring Jimin's favorite food every once in awhile, but that's routine for Taehyung to do.

So really, Jimins confusing Jungkook's motives of interest with friendship. He can't tell the difference when Taehyung has been treating him the same way as a friend. And it just leads Jimin to believe that Jungkook also thinks of him as a friend. Obviously he does, because its been awhile and . . . Jungkook just seems content with staying friends. 

“Jiminie? What's wrong love?" Jungkook asks in the middle of Cinderella, seeing the look on the others face. Jungkook knows Jimin really well by now, and vice versa.

“Nothing . . . Just tired is all Kookie." He mumbled, cuddling further into the other man. Jungkook holds him tighter, a deep, smooth hum rumbling his chest where Jimin lays to let him know he heard him despite his quiet voice.

“Well, you can sleep. I'll carry you back to your room when Taehyung comes." He says softly.

Jimin feels his heart melt as he nods, eyes falling close as he focuses on the deep and soothing breathing of the younger, forgetting about the conflict his feelings for Jungkook.

Jimin is still pained with the thought that even if they do like each other, he doesn't have long before the person he paid is out to kill him. He also keeps this to himself.

247 days

It's late, as usual. But it always is when Jimin gets back from work.

Someone's taken pity on him, and he now works at a mini mart. He wants to tell Taehyung and Jungkook about it, how even though his schedule makes him work late he's bringing in money - which means paying rent despite Taehyung not wanting him too. It means buying Jungkook's birthday gift and Taehyung's favorite food on days he's stressed.

It means a step to a better life.

Of course, the job isn't the only thing that helps. Jungkook is. How could he not be?

The younger basically lives with Jimin and Taehyung. He comes over right after school, keeping Yeontan company as he waits for Taehyung or Jimin or both.

It's usually Taehyung who comes home first, the both playing games for a bit before the elder retreats to his room to work on school work. Not too long after Jimin comes with snacks and he's ranting to Jungkook about his day as he puts the items away.

“And then he gave me a twenty dollar tip, can you believe that?"

“Jiminie . .  It's a little mean you gave him a fake number.” Jungkook chuckles as he snatches a cookie from Jimin's opened box without him noticing, enjoying the extra chocolate chips.

“I'm sorry, you gotta do what you gotta do for money Kookie.” He says, standing on his tippy toes to try and put Taehyung's chips on the top shelf.

Jungkook gets up, seeing him struggle. He stands behind Jimin, chest flushed against his back as he takes the bag and puts it up himself. He can hear the argument coming.

Jimin pouts, scoffing as he turns to face Jungkook who's . .  Who's really close.

“I could've done it just fine. I don't need help.” Jimin whines.

"Yeah, and stretch a small muscle of yours? I thought your toes were gonna -”

"Kookie I'm tall enough.” Jimin mumbles, and he realizes that . . . One of them is leaning in.

“I'm not saying you can't Minnie . .  I just like helping you.” He says, voice suddenly soft.

As soft as his lips.

The kiss is light and warm, making something bloom deep within Jimin's chest. Jungkooks holding his waist with so much care Jimin literally melts.

“Hey . .," Jimin mumbles, pulling back a little, Jungkook suddenly looking very nervous. “You ate my cookies didn't you?” He smiles, making Jungkook break out in a grin.

“You wanna find out again?" He asks, and then they're kissing again, the feeling of it very addicting.

They don't register that Jungkooks crowding Jimin to the counter until Jimin hand slips, and before he can stumble Jungkook reaches out. When he leans forward though, Jungkook's head hits the open cupboard, the corner scratching his forehead.

They spend the night with Jimin pressing a bandaid, and kiss, to the cut and cuddling on Jimin's bed, falling asleep within their arms.

Jimin doesn't know it, but if these are his last days, well fuck, he's glad he's spending it like this.

213 days

The first time it happens Jimin's heart stops.

They're in Jimins room, the elder looking through his laptop for the Marvel movie marathon he wants.

“Love, you really don't have to. I mean, I'm fine with -,”

"We're doing Marvel and that's final.” He says as the laptop connects to the tv, the first movie popping up being Spiderman. Jimin let's it play as he pushes his laptop to the side before cuddling into Jungkook.

“Man, you really know how to please your boyfriend." Jungkook laughs as the movie starts.

"Yeah, I please the people I love." Jimin doesn't notice the comment he made nonchalantly.

“I . . . Park Jimin you love me?" He asks, voice barey above a whisper.

Jimins silent, cheeks heating up. He fucked up one again, like he does everything else. Whoever this assassin is they need to hurry up and -

“Because I love you too. So fucking much it's, it's surreal. You're so perfect Jiminie.” Jungkook finishes.

They spend the first half of the movie exchanging sweet kisses and small 'I love you's, Jimins heart and body feeling so, so warm and full and complete with Jungkook right by his side.

185 days

“Jiminie baby, c'mon. I've already made reservations and -,”

"Jungkook I'm not feeling up to it. Can't we stay in?"

“No! No, baby, that's all you ever want to do.” Jungkook says, exasperated.

They've been arguing for thirty minutes. Jungkook wants to take Jimin out on a real date, claiming that 'cuddling and making out and watching movies and cooking’ isn't the real idea of a date no matter how nice it is.

“Because I'm tired Kook. I just got back from work and - I'm not up for going out to eat. I already had something to eat and -,”

"Ramen doesn't count dear. Seriously Jimin, I looked for a restaurant that would stay open late to take-,”

"And I'm flattered by it, thanks for going through that. But I'm just tired Kookie. Please, let's stay in tonight.” Jimin says, voice soft. He hates the face Jungkook makes, not liking the idea.

“Jiminie . . Jagi please? Just, just dinner is all I'm asking.” Jungkook says softly, looking desperate for the answer he wants..

Jimin wants to say yes, so fucking bad. He just, he can't take any risks. No. He wants to spend as much time as he can with Jungkook and he won't take that risk. Let Jungkook be pissed, at least he'll still be with him.

“I'm sorry, but I'm gonna shower and sleep. It was a hard day Jungkook.” He mumbled, feeling guilty.

It's silent, and then the unexpected happens.

“Okay . . . Okay fine. Goodnight then Jimin." Jungkook says, and he storms out the apartment.

It's times like these when Jimin lays alone at night that he doesn't. . . He doesn't feel regret for hiring the assassin.

153 days

Jimin and Jungkook have yet to go on a real date. They'll argue about it some times, about how Jimin can't stay cooped up in the apartment. Other times, Jungkook will storm out or Jimin will retreat by himself to his room. It never ends well.

Today's no different. Okay, well it is. Because Taehyung is in the middle of it.

“Chim, when was the last time you went out that wasn't for work? C'mon, you're acting like you're gonna die stepping out there.” He says softly.

It's true. Very much true. And Jimin almost cracks.

“I just don't like going out. Why can't -,”

" I swear if you say we should stay in again I'm gonna be pissed! That's all you ever say Jimin, I'm tired of staying in. You have no valid excuse for being cramped up in here. You didn't work today either, you can't possibly be tired. Why can't we leave?” Jungkook's voice is strained, and it makes Jimin's heart hurt.

It's silent after that, tears pricking Jimins eyes like they usually do with these arguments. Only this time, he doesn't argue back.

“Okay," he mumbled.

Taehyungs eyes widen and Jungkook has to shake his head.

“Okay?"

“Let's go." Jimin mumbles, sniffling as he wipes his face.

If he died today . . . It'd be worth it because he's never seen Jungkooks face light up so fast. The younger one smiles so widely and hugs Jimin and kisses him with such love that . .  That Jimin won't mind getting stabbed or ambushed or whatever his assassin may have in mind.

124 days

Things are remarkably better now. They go out frequently, though Jimin needs reassurance every once in awhile. Jungkook never fails to do so though.

“Don't worry baby, I'm always gonna protect you.” Jungkook whispers into his ear as they stand in line to get into the club.

“I know . . . I know. I just still get scared.” He mumbled, hands resting on top of Jungkook's since his arms are around his waist, making him feel so secure and warm.

“Well no asshole is gonna even look at you the wrong way. If anything baby, you give me the word and we'll be out the club and at home so I can make pancakes that stick to ceilings and cuddle on Taehyung's bed to piss him off” Jungkook kisses his cheek, and Jimin smiles softly.

“Thank you Jagi. Really."

“Anytime Minnie. I'd do anything for you.”

“I'm sure you would."

Jimin doesn't know how true Jungkook's words are.

52 days

Its close. A little less than two months. Jimin knows because he's marked his calendar. He gets more anxious the more days that pass by.

He hasn't told anyone of what he's done, and honestly, right now he's just hoping the man forgot his face or was searching him in a different part of the country. He hopes the man forgets overall, because Jimin doesn't want to die anymore.

Not when Jungkook's been the best thing that's happened to him. The same boy who holds him when he's had a bad day at work and kisses him with such love and care it makes Jimin realize how lucky he is to have him. The one who holds him close at night, arms wrapped so tightly and firm that Jimin feels safe, falling asleep without a worry or care in the world.

Okay well, not exactly.

“Are you sure you wanna stay in for our anniversary? I thought you wanted to go on a picnic tonight. That's why I called off work early.” Jimin says softly.

Jungkook shakes his head. He's been a little gloom today. “Can . . Mind if we stay here?"

It's like they switched roles. Jimin wanted to go out today, make it memorable. Jungkook doesn't feel like it.

“I just," Jimin sighs. He can't deny Jungkooks face when he already looks hurt. “okay. Okay baby. I'll order food." He says, sitting next to Jungkook. His arms wrap around him, pulling him close and letting his fingers run through his smooth, brown hair.

“I'm sorry. I just wanna be here with you." Jungkook mumbles.

" It's okay Jagi, no need to apologise. You wanna talk about it?”

The firm shake of his head makes Jimin drop the subject, talking about his day and how some kids tried to fake their age by getting beer.

“They were scared shitless when I called them out on it. Should've seen them kookie, it was quite funny.”

"I bet it was.” Jungkook says softly, tracing patterns onto Jimin's thighs.

Jimin wishes he pushed the subject and had Jungkook talk to him.

21 days

They don't go out anymore. Jungkook isn't in the mood and well, it was always Jungkook pushing for them to go out.

They do change their places to hangout. It's not wide though. It's either Jimins apartment or Jungkook's dorm room when his roommate is gone for the day or weekend.

They spend their time cuddling and cooking, watching TV series since movie marathons weren't doing it anymore.

“So you're telling me that . . . That he's supposed to be so smart he solved NASA's problem of the crashing of shuttles when landing but NASA couldn't execute it all while being like, thirteen while in junior year? Bullshit. “ Jungkook throws popcorn at his tv, making Jimin laugh.

"Baby, it's called a TV show for a reason." Jimin teases from his spot on Jungkook's lap.

“Yeah but, it's not even good. Let's start a new series. I heard that new horror show came out and -,”

"Like hell we are, we're almost done with this one. Plus, I hate horror shows.” Jimin whines, cuddling deeper into Jungkook when the younger gently rubs his sides.

“I recall that it's my time to pick. Sorry not sorry." He teases, peppering kisses on his neck, making Jimin scoff in disagreement but that's it.

“Hey . . . What are you doing in two weeks for spring break?” Jimin suddenly asks.

"Nothing . .  Why?”

“Because Taehyungie told me he'd be going on a work trip for a week and a half in Busan and . .  Well, im gonna have the apartment all to myself.” He says softly, hoping for Jungkook to get the innuendo.

He does. But maybe not the way Jimin wants him to.

“Tell me the dates baby and I'll be sure to be there. Don't worry, we'll have fun.”

Jimin smiles, nodding as he turns to kiss Jungkook, shutting him up about bashing the show that's on. It doesn't stop the giggles Jimin let's out every once in awhile at his accusations.

He's so whipped in love.

He doesn't realize how horrible wrong Jungkook is about spring break.

13 days

It's so wrong.

Being under Jungkook like this on the couch, soft pants being heard throughout the apartment. His eyes are fluttered closed, enjoying the kisses Jungkook plants on his thighs, keening at the fresh marks he's made.

Jungkooks only doing it because he found Jimin crying.

Jimins so, so scared. He's so fucking scared of dying. He's so scared of leaving Jungkook, of leaving Taehyung, of leaving his life. He still hasn't told anyone, and when he cries from the immense fear, they don't talk about it. His boyfriend or friend hold him and reassure him and tell him that everything is going to be okay.

It's not.

When Taehyung left Jungkook had came, and he's spent the night for the week, and plans to until Taehyung comes back. It's no surprise Jungkook asks why Jimin is crying more frequently when the days count down. And Jimin can only do so much before he says the truth.

“I-I . . . Kookie I'm scared." He mumbles as he sits on his lap.

“Of what baby? You know Taehyungie and I would never let anything hurt you.” He says and god . . Jungkook is so innocent.

Right?

“I know but, I-I, Kookie I," his throat tightens and his heart aches, pounding heart in his chest. “I love you, so much."

He can't tell his boyfriend.

"Jiminie.” Jungkook sighs, holding him close. “If you're scared of losing me, don't worry. I'm not going to leave. You're stuck with me love.” He whispers into Jimin's skin.

It makes him cry harder, and pretty soon, Jungkooks kissing him all over, reassuring how much he loves Jimin, how much he cherishes him amd would do anything, how he plans to stay with the elder as long as he'll let him.

And the small kisses ends up with Jungkook kissing him on the lips with such fragility, such care and love, that Jimin feels safe.

For now.

And that's how they spend the night, Jungkook cherishing Jimin and his whole body, mumbling sweet nothings after each kiss on every inch of his skin.

Jimin wouldn't have it any other way, at least not right now.

8 days

It's four in the morning when he gets the call.

Jungkooks things are packed to go since Taehyung arrives today, but there's a change of plans.

“Is this Park Jimin?" Someone says over the phone.

Jimin replies, and slips out of Jungkooks embrace to go to the living room, letting him sleep a little longer.

“This is the Busan Police Department. We're sorry to inform you of this so early in the morning but we've just come to find out that Kim Taehyung has been involved in an accident.”

Jimin's heart drops to his stomach and he feels nauseous.

“W-What? What kind? Is he okay? Where is he? I'll come over as soon as -,”

" Mr. Park . . . We regret to say this but, he," the officer hesitates. " He was working on machinery in a local factory when he seemed to have fell and . . . The machinery tipped. He was crushed. I'm sorry but he didn't make it.”

Jimin doesn't think the pain that he feels now can compare to anything he's ever felt before. His knees go weak and he stumbles until he's suddenly sitting on the floor. His face is pale, a sheet of sweat starting to cover his body as he grips the phone, trying to ground himself into the harsh reality. He doesn't realize how fast tears pour out and how the sob that rips out his chest is so painful.

“H-He can't be, I just talked to him two nights ago, please, this must be some kind of mistake.” Jimin cries. There's footsteps behind him he doesn't register.

“We're sorry Mr. Park. We intend to update you with more information when we have it.” The officer says solemnly.

Jimin just cries, and suddenly the phone is being yanked from his hand.

“Thank you for telling us. Please call us back when you know more about what will happen with him.” Jungkook says, then he's hanging up.

Jungkook sits behind Jimin, pulling him close into a hug as he cries.

Jungkook doesn't shed a tear.

3 days

Jimin and Jungkook went to Busan together. They needed someone to identify the body. Jungkook had volunteered to do it, but Jimin insists that he wants to. He has to.

He needs to say the goodbye he never got the chance to say. The goodbye he shouldn’t be saying.

Taehyungs body is . . . It's not pretty.

Jimin takes one look at it and starts to cry. They pull back the blanket and -

It's really him.

He's almost unrecognizable, hard to explain so Jimin won't try. The only words that come to his mind is how unbelievable this all is. How surreal.

He spends a while crying, mumbling apologies and things that represent a goodbye. He talks about how thankful and how grateful he was for the man, and how sorry he is.

Jimin hesitates for a second, but he's unclipping the necklace from Taehyung's neck.

He notices the jacket that covers Taehyung’s body . . . it’s not his. Taehyung doesn’t like leather jackets.

1 day

Jimin's no detective. Really, he's not. But he's not fucking stupid either.

He's alone today, packing up his things as Jungkook finds him a new apartment. He doesn't know why he's packing. His life has gone to shit and, if Jungkook wasn't around as much as he was, he . . .  Jimin wouldn't be standing here right now.

The sight of Taehyung won't leave his mind. What's even more disturbing is the jacket won't either.

Jimin knows that fucking jacket. He's worn it many times himself, he fucking knows.

So how is it that the jacket Jungkook was wearing days before Taehyung's death is on his body?

Jungkook had worn the jacket when Taehyung left. Jimin knows because he has a picture he took of the younger the next day when they had a movie night.

So how? How the fuck is it on his best friends body?

And so Jimin tried to think of any outcome possible. Is Jungkook cheating on him? Did he go out to see Taehyung?

Was . . .Was Jungkook the reason of Taehyung’s death?

And so Jimin goes through every scenario possible in his head. He tries not to let his feelings get in the way because - well fuck, he’s dying soon. There’s no point in trying to keep his relationship afloat.

So Jimin decides to throw his life away. He really doesn't have much longer anyway.

0 days

“So how did you do it?” Jimin asks, voice cold.

They're standing in the middle of the living room of Taehyung's apartment, Jungkook holding his luggage. He has a confused look on his face and it pisses him off more.

How can he look so fucking innocent and pure?

“Uh, I grabbed the handle and pulled up?" Jungkook says, even showing him how he grabbed the luggage and Jimin has the urge to slap him.

"No, you dumbass. How'd you see Taehyung when you're with me? I kept thinking about it last night, and the day before. You were here with me the whole fucking time but, but how? How were you with Taehyung?”

Jungkooks quiet, and Jimin thinks he got him.

"Baby, what are you talking about? I was here, I was literally with you the whole time. You just said I was.” He says softly, putting down the luggage and stepping closer to Jimin. “Are you okay? You wanna -,"

“Stop acting like you care! Stop it! How did you do it? I-I deserve to know, I deserve that much at least!” Jimin cries out, and he's shoving Jungkook back. There's a small click in his pocket.

Jungkook sighs, jaw tight as he looks away, Jimin eyeing his pocket. He’s no expert but-

Those aren’t just car keys.

“Jiminie I . . . You don't know what you're saying huh?" He says softly.

"For fuck sake, what?” Jimins heart is pumping so, so fast.

“Love, you’re stressed out. Really. Cmon, lets get your stuff in the -,”

“Did you cheat on me Jungkook? Stop avoiding the fucking topic - I have a right to know.” Jimin says again, and there are tears in his eyes. Jungkook visibly softens

“No . . .No Jimin, I could never cheat on you. I love you so-,”

“Why did Taehyung have your jacket then? Why was he wearing it when we went to go see him?” Jimin blurts out.

Everything’s frozen. Jungkook is still, eyes wide as he stares at Jimin. Jimin’s arms are crossed, looking conflicted.

Another click. Jimin is starting to get an idea of what is in his pocket.

“Jimin, baby-,”

“Answer the question Jungkook!”

“I just, you should know. For fuck sake you put in the request, are you asking to test me or do you really want to know?” Jungkook looks stressed, and Jimin doesn't think it's fair. Because -, he should be the one slowly breaking down, not Jungkook.

“I, what are you talking about?” Jimin's head hurts as it painfully connects more dots that he didn't think was there.

“You hired me to kill him damn it. You . . . You sent in pictures and - you hired me for this. So what are you doing? Are you really curious how I did it or are you playing some kind of game to make sure it was me? What do you want?”

Jimin feels like throwing up. The person he had been so scared of the past year was his own fucking boyfriend.

He hired Jungkook as an assasin. It makes sense.

“I-I . . . You weren't supposed to kill him!" Jimin shoves Jungkook, who stumbles back. “The request was for me asshole, it was for me! I sent in a picture, i put my name and -,”

"You sent a picture of both of you, and I just, you didn't say it was for yourself, you didn't put any details, you just forwarded the money and qualifications.” Jungkook talks fast, like he can make up for what he did.

For what Jimin made him do.

“I'm specialized in killing others for people, that's what my bio says.” And Jimin remembers reading it. " Jimin I - you can't be serious right now.”

It's silent, and Jimin's face is sickly pale at the reality of the mess he's caused.

He doesn't hesitate to move closer to Jungkook, and his hand grips the gun he feels in there.

“And this? What's it for?" Jimin says, feeling Jungkook tense.

" I . . . I had another assignment. I was going to do it today and get it out of the way.” He mumbled lowly. Jimin clenches his jaw when he feels Jungkook shift. 

He's not fast enough. Jimins suddenly holding the gun.

“You said you'd do anything for me right? Can you pull it? I don't think-,”

"Holy fuck, Jimin put that down.” Jungkook hisses, and when he takes a step closer Jimin cocks the gun.

“Don't you fucking dare!" Jimins mouth is bitter, and he comes to terms with everything, with the distorted reality he caused. "Answer me!"

Like he said before -

Jimin doesn't know how true Jungkook's words are.

“Jimin stop, put it-, don't do this. We can fix this, it'll get better.” Jungkook sounds frantic, eyes darting around as if he's trying to find something to make everything better. 

"So you won't.” Jimin scoffs, and the bitter laugh that follows isn't at all reassuring.

The sound of a gunshot rings out through the apartment is horrifying.

The only thing worse than that is the sound of the next gunshot that follows.

At least Jimin was right to believe one thing. Jungkook would never leave him.