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Sunwoo had never had a favorite color. There wasn’t some big meaning behind it, it wasn’t an act of rebellion or a deliberate choice he’d made. He’d just never quite understood what made anyone think a particular color was special. Eventually, after years of people questioning why he didn’t have one, Sunwoo defaulted to saying it was black. After all, he wore that color more often than not, so nobody would think otherwise.
Haknyeon lay star fished beside Sunwoo, arm thrown carelessly over his waist. Sunwoo didn’t mind, he never had. Haknyeon was bold, bright and always took up more space than Sunwoo could ever have expected. He lifts his hand, plays with the ring on his index finger. Eric had got them all matching rings, a symbol of their everlasting friendship. A promise that no matter how far across the world they all travelled, they’d come back home to each other.
The four of them had become a group in the first week of college. Sunwoo had shared a room with Eric and Haknyeon shared with Hyunjoon across the hall. Eric and Haknyeon had become fast friends, due to their similar bubbly personalities, which meant Hyunjoon and Sunwoo had become fast friends in order to handle them both. Since then, they spent virtually all their time together. Hyunjoon had been the person who called Sunwoo out because his pining was "way too obvious, but Haknyeon was blind". He doesn't know where he'd be without them. He doesn't entertain the thought. He hasn't seen Eric or Hyunjoon in a while, but they still keep in touch as often as they can.
Eric was in Japan, if Sunwoo remembers correctly. Once they finished college, Eric had set off to explore the world like he’d described ever since they were kids. he missed him, of course; Eric had been Sunwoos best friend ever since they were toddlers stumbling around Eric’s living room. They’d grown up together, which is why the separation was hard, but Sunwoo understood that it was something Eric needed to do. The boy was restless and hated routine. Travelling the world gave him endless opportunities to explore and he made sure to describe every single one over the groups monthly face-times.
Hyunjoon was a professional dancer now, which had surprised absolutely no-one. He travelled the country performing with Changmin, Juyeon and his older brother Hyunjae. Sunwoo tried to watch every live stream of their performances whenever he could, but sometimes he missed them and had to wait until Hyunjae sent them the recording he took. He couldn’t wait until they were back in Seoul so he could see them perform on stage once more. Ever since they’d first met, Sunwoo had admired Hyunjoon's passion and talent for dance. It captivated him, the way the boy moved was so elegant and powerful, Sunwoo felt drawn in. He’d knew from that moment that Hyunjoon was destined for great things.
Haknyeon was a breakfast radio host on a local channel. It wasn’t as grand as the other two, but he loved it wholeheartedly. Sunwoo had never seen him happier than when he found out he’d got the job, and in the two years since that day, had never heard Haknyeon complain without immediately following it up by gushing about how much he loved it all, even the stress. Sunwoo couldn't imagine him doing anything else.
It’s part of the reason He was so smitten with him, he thinks. Haknyeon was a flood of optimism and excitement, his enthusiasm for everything he did infected everyone he came across. It was hard not to be swept up in it all; so Sunwoo stopped trying. He let himself get carried away with Haknyeon and his life was, for the most part, better because of it.
He looks over at him now, the boys cherry red hair splayed against the blue pillow. He’s scrolling through something on his phone, the blanket tucked underneath a leg, the other one thrown atop it. There’s a smile on his face, as there usually is. Sunwoo doesn’t think he’d ever met someone with such a love for life like Haknyeon. but, he considers, he might just be biased.
The thought brings a smile to his face, which causes Haknyeon to reach out and poke his finger into his cheek. “You’re being gay again, aren’t you?” he laughs and Sunwoo can’t help but revel in it, a laugh of his own erupting from him.
“I didn’t even say anything!” He protests, all the while laughing away. He knows he doesn’t need to; Haknyeon knows him as well as he knows himself, if not better. He can predict Sunwoos next move without even thinking about it. It used to be a little intimidating, how well Haknyeon knew him. Now, it provides him a comfort he never knew could be found in another person.
“So i’m right, then?” Haknyeon grins, his tongue poking out between his teeth as a taunt. He sidles closer to Sunwoo, resting his head on his shoulder and peering up at his face. “What’s your favorite color?”
Sunwoo opens his mouth to answer, truthfully, because he thinks he would understand if he said he didn’t have one, but before he can speak a word Haknyeon's already pressing his finger against Sunwoos mouth. “Wait, wait! Don’t tell me, I’ll guess!”
He shuffles, sitting up, his back resting against the headboard of their bed. The excitement radiates from him and Sunwoo feels it wash over him, warm and radiant. He is a sun in name alone, he thinks. Haknyeon is the personification of it. warm and sweet, exciting and bright. His radiance floods through Sunwoo and energises him. He’s never happier than when he’s by Haknyeons side.
Haknyeon smiles, as if he can read Sunwoos thoughts. It causes an embarrassed smile to adorn his face. He just stares at Sunwoo for a moment, with an incredible intensity that makes him glance away. He doesn’t know what to do under scrutiny - who does?
Suddenly, like a firework exploding against the dark night sky, Haknyeon bounces, prodding Sunwoo in the center of his chest. “Your favorite color is yellow, right?”
Sunwoo stares at him, at the light that pours from him in vibrant waves. He thinks about how deeply in love with this boy he is. He doesn’t think he could ever get sick of this. Of Haknyeons excitement over small things like this. He thinks of his boyfriend as the sun; he is simply the moon that watches from behind, reflects light to others. He thinks about how Haknyeon knows him so entirely, so resolutely. He lifts Haknyeons hand from his chest and links their fingers together before he nods. “how did you know?”
“Because it’s a happy color, obviously.” Haknyeon leans in closer, a small distance between their faces. “It reminds you of me, doesn’t it?” He laughs, moving to return to where he was sprawled, before Sunwoo rests his free hand on his cheek and guides him back, pressing a soft kiss to his nose.
“It does.” he whispers, as if he was sharing a secret to be kept between only the pair of them, smiling softly. “It reminds me of you.”
From then on, Sunwoo saw the color everywhere. It was in the stars, the streetlights. It was hidden within the city they lived, buried deep within his routine. Sunwoo had never had a favorite color before, but now he does. It lives within his heart now. He asks people what their favorite color is and he wonders what it means to them. He wonders what memories they have associated with it. Were they, too, given it? Is it a precious gift they carry within them, something so precious and wonderful? The world is bright and it is vibrant. he understands now. Sunwoo knows what it means to have a favorite color now, and if that means he carries something yellow with him at all times?
Well, that’s his secret.