Work Text:
A House by the Ocean
Dread. It snakes, slithers up her veins to inject its venom in her heart where it pumps to the brain. Forcing her to be incapable of breath, her thoughts come to a crashing halt like a train stopping at full speed. The scent of his old cologne ensnares her sense as her throat clogs, unable to speak, unable to move. The sharp frozen air pierces through her thin sweater, yet it doesn’t seem to bother her. Not even the people shoving past her vex her. Remarks to move out of the way drown down the sink of sound and lifting a finger seems like a daunting task. The sensation of being punched repeatedly in the chest consumes her body. Like a lightning bolt thundering into her, she turns around desperately seeking the person she loves. The tang of pain sets in as she remembers what she did, what she had to do. The erasing of his memories of her, still fresh on her mind. The look of a stranger grew on his face as he had asked who she was. Defeat cultivates in her heart. A hard shove to the side tears her from her thoughts and reminds her of where she is and what she has to do. Collecting herself, she begins to get on track with her original plan.
~~~~
“Good Morning everyone!” Joon-hyeong says as he salutes formally.
“Gosh, him and his stupid formality,” Nam-hyeon grumbles as Pil-seong takes his seat next to him.
Pil-seong yawns in response and sets his assigned gun on the desk and opens the laptop lying beside it.
“Did you pull and all-nighter again?” Nam-hyeon whispers to Pil-seong.
Pil-seong ignores him and looks through the files of the string of murders.
“You look gross, take a shower every once in a while Pil-seong,” Chief Yoo states as he takes his spot at the head of the tables at his police chief desk.
Again Pil-seong ignores them, looking further into the murder case. Trying to find something, anything. The mirror, the cut fingernails, and brutal killings circle in his head.
The killings should have stopped when we killed Seon Yang-woo. Why are they still occuring? What connects the victims? How is this still happening? Why can’t I figure this out? Thoughts spin wildly in his mind the more he thinks on it.
“What are you doing?” Chief Yoo asks. Not receiving a response he raises his voice,”Pil-seong! What are you doing?”
“What?” Pil-seong is ripped from his thoughts.
“I thought I told you to get off that case, it’s out of our hands.”
“But the killer is still out there-“ Pil-seong begins, frustrated.
“Come here,” Chief Yoo drags him out of the room.
“Are we going to the bathroom again?” Pil-seong complains. “Can’t you just talk to me like a normal person?”
“Shut up.” Chief Yoo states as they enter the bathroom, pulls him into the stall, and closes the door behind them.
“Why are you still on the Seon Yang-woo case, it’s been passed into the other unit. We can’t work on it.” Chief whispers loudly to him.
“It’s the same killer.”
“We killed him! Do you not remember that? I watched him die with my own eyes! Eleven bullets were loaded into his body, there’s no way he’s alive.”
“It has to be him…” Pil-seong concentrates, but is interrupted again by the chief leaning over the toilet to whisper.
“Did you not hear anything I just told you!” Chief’s whisper echoes through the bathroom.
“But-“
“No! I forbid you to work on this case anymore, it’s driving you crazy, and you’re driving me crazy. Go see a therapist or something, the other team is handling it.” Chief whispers authoritatively to Pil-seong.
“Can we leave the stall, it’s weird.”
“Oh,” embarrassment paints Chief’s face,”yeh sorry.”
Exiting the bathroom Pil-seong thinks frustratedly, i don’t know how but he’s alive, he has to be.
~~~~~
Sticky notes litter the floors and walls. Names and places scribbled on every note, each a possible hint to the next murder, next victim, to Yang-woo. Pil-seong paces softly back and forth from the notes on the wall to the notes on the floor. Mumbling, he begins to narrow down the list. Hours pass as one after another note makes it way to the trash bin. Pil-seong sits, staring at the remaining notes like one will magically tell him what to do next. A thirst for air grows in his lungs as he tears himself away from the notes and heads out. The winter air pours into his lungs in a relieving cascade. The harsh, freezing air envelopes him, leaving goosebumps tracing up and down his skin. He makes his way down the street and around the corner. A hint of familiarity pulls at his subconscious as he passes an alleyway. A staircase leading to a resident door shines in his mind. A want to enter the house brushes the corners of his thoughts. Looking up. He realizes his feet had already led him to the bottom of those stairs.
What am I doing? Pil-seong thinks as he looks down at his own feet. Shaking his head, he turns around and exits the alley. A need to take one more glance takes over him as he rounds the corner. His head is met with a hard jolt as someone runs into him, sending them both tumbling to the ground.
“Ow!” The lady exclaims, sitting up from the cold concrete sidewalk.
Regaining his whereabouts, Pil-seong gets up quickly. He apologizes and helps the woman up.
“I’m sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going. Let me help you.”
“It’s okay, it’s okay, i’ll get it,” the lady said, her short black hair ruffled from the fall. She went to quickly gather her things back into the bag. Pil-seong bends down, picking up some of the items. He picks up a thick, white roll of string, incense, and a thin spell paper. He looks at the items for a moment, then sets them in the bag.
“Aren’t these used for rituals?”
“Ah, yes,”she looks up at him. Looking up, his eyes meet hers and her face strikes him as beautiful and familiar. Her wide, black doe eyes look at him intently, and he feels like she can really see him. It’s as if she’s looking into him, seeing every bit of who he really is. He can’t help the tang of pain as he looks over her, her eyes, her straight nose leading to her soft curved lips.
“Who are you?” He whispers involuntarily.
Blinking, she collects herself,”Seon-jeong.” She searches for any sign of recognition but finds none. He’s not my Pil-seong, I erased every part of me from him, there’s no way he could know me now. She reminds herself and realizes she’ a shaman now. He can’t call her by her real name, not like before. I have to keep him safe. This is the only way. “Sorry, I meant Hong Myojin. I just became a Shaman.”
“Congratulations, Myojin. Sorry about running into you. Let me take you to dinner to make up for this accident.”
“That’s very nice of you, but I’m afraid I can’t. I’m busy tonight, thank you though.”
“Oh okay. Well, have a good night Ms. Myojin,” he takes a quick bend.
“You too.” as Seo-jeong passes him and turns the corner, the tears slip through and she can barely hold herself together anymore.
~
Pil-seong looks back as she disappears from sight, realizing she lives there. Why is she so familiar?
~~~~~
Running his fingers through his untrimmed hair, he lets out a sigh.
“What is it?” his partner, Nam-hyeon, asks.
“Nothing,” Pil-seong answers shortly.
“Are you still working on the Seon Yang-woo case?” Jun-hyeong asks, leaning back in his chair, peeking over Nam-hyon’s shoulder to see his computer screen.
“No,” Pil-seong shuts his laptop and stands up.
“I thought I told you to leave that case alone,” Chief Yoo interjects.
“He’s still out there, he has to be.”
“It’s probably copycat murders. Some sick individual following in Seon Yang-woo’s footsteps.” Jun-hyeong suggests.
“I-” Pil-seong tries to argue.
“Why are you obsessing over a dead man?” Chief asks concerned.
Pil-seong ignores him.
“If you’re under too much mental stress, I suggest, again, that you seek professional help,” Chief gestures.
“I can’t believe you,” Pil-seong blows him off and heads out of the room.
“Hey Detective Kang, where are you going?” Jun-hyeog asks.
“Detective Kang wait!” Chief yells after him.
“Do you think, Detective Kang has developed PTSd from working on the Seon yang-woo case? He nearly died catching him, so it’s plausible.” Jun-hyeong says to the Chief concerned.
“We’ll keep an eye on him,” Chief replies while looking at the doorway Pil-seong had just left through.
~~~~~
The wheels in his mind finally begin to turn after starring as the sticky notes for hours. He slowly peels one after another from the wall and floor, until there’s two remaining. One on the floor and one on the wall stare blankly at him. He reads the name. ”Oh Soo-hyuk,” he whispers under his breath as he takes the sticky note into his hand.
He looks to the wall and reads an address.
“If Yang-woo really is dead, then this is the new murderer,” Pil-seong says to himself in his one room apartment.
Realization strikes as he re-reads the address. A small abandoned building flashes in his mind. Sheets of plastic hanging flutter behind his eyelids. In the center of the plastic hangs a woman, underneath he sees himself holding up. Yang-woo walks behind him, trailing a gun on the back of his head. The sounds of the gunshots echo in his mind as he watched yang-woo fall to the ground, smiling as the police emptied their bullets into him. The memory fresh on his mind, he throws his coat on, grabs his gun, and heads out into the dark towards a place he was hoping he’d never have to visit again.
~~~~~
Knees bent and legs folding under her, Seo-jeong begins to place the ritual items on the small, ground-level, table. Her ceremonial, white robes hang on her small frame. The blue, gold, and red cloth hangs around her shoulders like a towel. She sets a small ceramic bowl to the side and fills it with water. After setting the table to the precise placements, she waits for the man hired to bring Soo-hyuk to her unconcious.
A shuffle and grunt from the left startles Seo-jeongs.
“It’s just me,” the gangster says to her, with Oh Soo-hyuk slung over his shoulder. “Where would you like me to put him?”
“Just on that mat,” she points to the white rug on the dirt ground in front of her.
The gangster slings him off his shoulder, causing Soo-hyuk to land head first on the mat. The thud echoes in the garbage filled space.
After standing up, he offers his hand ut, gesturing for money.
“Here,” Seo-jeong hands him his desired amount,”good job.”
“Thanks boss,” he salutes to her, smiling as he takes the money.
“I’m not your boss, now go back to your business,” Seo-jeong says shortly.
“You don’t need any help here?” the man asks.
“No, I have to do this alone,” Seo-jeong replies solemnly.
Once she feels that the punk is gone, she lights the thun spell paper on fire. The blue sparks ignite and grow into orange licks of flame, the hot light reflecting in her deep eyes. The paper crinkles and cracks as the flames envelope it in a blaze. As the fire reaches her fingertips, she lays it in the water-filled bowl. The black ashes crumble in on itself and breaks apart as it soaks in the water. She takes the thick, white thread placing one end in the ashy water and leads the other end to rest on Soo-hyuk’s chest. She begins to whisper prayers followed by chants. Carefully placing her soft fingers and palm to settle on his forehead. As her words escalate and quicken, she begins to shake. The sensation of a burning sauna swallows her body creating drops of sweat to roll down in beads from her face. She feels the resistance the dark spirit is putting up. She recognizes it as the one that had taken over Yang-woo’s body. It cackles at her discovery, confirming her suspicion. He jumped to Soo-hyuk’s body after they killed Yang-woo, she thinks to herself. The cackling of the spirit contorts into howling and screaming as it thrashes inside his body. She feels his barriers falling and can almost reach the spirit that has hidden deep inside Yang-woo’s mind. She grasps it with the edge of her mind and grabs on. As the she begins to pull it out of the vessel, it commences to laugh. Turning to look directly at her, her parts his lips to upturn into a smile.
“You think you can really catch me?” the spirit howls.
Seo-jeong’s eyes widen in fear as she snaps back to reality.
Her eyes snap open to find Soo-hyuk’s fingers twitching.
“He’s waking up,” she says quietly, worriedly.
She hurries to the other side of the table, retrieving her knife from her bag. She grips the handle tightly as her hand begins to tremble in panic. Soo-hyuk’s eyes shoot open wildly. Bending his arm backwards and arching his back, he unnaturally springs to his feet. He tilts his head to the side as he looks her over.
“It’ll be so much fun stealing your soul, your power alone is outstanding, but combined with mine.. Now that’s something.”
“Stay away from me,” Seo-jeong’s voice shakes.
“What? Are you scared of me?” Soo-hyuk jumps towards her, causing her to jerk back,”You should be.”
As he walks towards her, filling the space between them to mere inches, she raises the blade. His movements blur in a fluid motion, too quick to stop as he grabs her wrist, attaining the blade before she can blink. He pulls her to him.
“Don’t worry,I’ll make it quick,” he whispers to her, lips pressed against her ear.
Seo-jeong squirms and fights against him, but he’s too strong to get away.
“No…” tears form in the corners of her eyes as she comprehends that she failed. Everything, erasing Pil-seong’s memories of me to save him, dedicating my life to be a shaman, it’s all for nothing.
She inhales as she stops fighting, accepting her fate. He pulls the blade back and drives it forward.
A gunshot rings in the silence, taking Soo-hyuk to the ground.
But it was too late.
“I should’ve killed you a long time ago,” Soo-hyuk says through gritted teeth as he holds his leg from the gunshot wound.
“Pil-seong..” Seo-jeong says faintly as she sees him, gun in hand, eyes blazing.
“Ms. Hong...” Pil-seong racks his brain to remember her name.
“Seo-jeong,” she sasy, smiling.
An ache spreading from her torso prompts her to look down. The hilt of the blade sticks harshly out of her. She looks back up at him,”I’m sorry.”
A deep chuckle sounds from the ground as Soo-hyuk sees the blade embedded inside her. It erupts into a hysterical laugh. Pil-seong raises his gun to aim at his head.
“No! I have to finish the ritual or the killings will never stop.” Seo-jeong pleads as she sways.
Hesitantly, he lowers the gun. Passing Soo-hyuk, he rams the butt of the gun into the side of his head, knocking him out cold.
As she slowly sinks, he gently catches her, each hand on the sides of her arms keeping her up.
“I have to, I have-”
“Shh you don’t talk, it’s okay.”
“I have to finish the ritual, I just need to remove the spirit to dissipate the spirit and the vessel's soul,” she says quickly, desperately.
“It’s okay, we’ll arrest him. He won’t be getting out of jail for a long time,” Pil-seong says not fully understanding.
“Pil-seong listen, just… let me do this. Don’t let me die for nothing,” she pleads.
“Okay,” he says softly, not knowing why he agreed, but he feels something in his heart begging him to let her.
He helps her over to the table and drags Soo-hyuk’s body back to the now blood-stained mat.
She takes up a small bell in her hand and rings it slowly. The tempo picks up as she places the thread back on his chest while chanting breathily. She shakes vigorously as she rings the bell and calls out to the gods for their blessing and strength. The ringing bell blurs into one constant sound as she opens her eyes to see the spirit slowly being pulled from his body. Still ringing the bell, se gestures to Pil-seong to come closer. With the last bit of her strength, she places her hand on his head. He needs to see, to know. I don’t want to die alone, with him as a stranger. She opens her third eye to the spiritual world as she takes her hand from him. His eyes widen s he sees her, really sees her, as his Seo-jeong.
The look in his eyes is one of waking up from a dream. Looking over to Soo-hyuk’s unconscious body, he sees the spirit rising up from him. With her last drop of effort, she pulls the spirit completely out and casts a quick spell to dissipate the being. It burns and dissipates in the air, returning to the hell it came from.
Seo-jeong falls back, exhausted. The blood, having spread down the front of her robe, stains the material in a gruesome picture.
“I did it Pil-seong,” she whispers as he keeps her head from contacting the ground; lying her head to rest softly on his lap.
“What happened,” a look of bewilderment paints his face. “ i was just on the sand with you, but here you are, in my arms but not like before. How did we get here?”
“Don’t be angry with me,” she whispers as more tear roll down the side of her face. “I had to. I did it to protect you. I- I erased your memories of me.”
“That’s so stupid. I’m supposed to be the one protecting you,” he says ,fighting back tears.
“I’m sorry,” she brings her fingertips to his cheek, wiping the salty water from his face.
“You can be sorry later, after we get you to a hospital and healed,” Pil-seong says reassuringly.
“Pil-seong.” She says softly. He raises his face, unable to keep the tidal wave of tears at bay. “ I’m not going to get better, I won’t even make it to the hospital.”
“Don’t say that, you’ll make it. It’s gonna be okay,” he shakes his head.
“Pil-seong. I’m not even in pain anymore, I can’t feel it.”
His eyes widen, understanding the seriousness of what she just said.
“It’s fine, it’s going to be fine,” he says in denial.
“ I love you,” Seo-jeong says looking him in the eyes.
“Don’t, Don’t say goodbye, don’t,” Pil-seong trembles.
“I’ve always loved you.”
“I love you too.” he manages out in between breaths.
“Promise me, promise me,” she softly pulls his head back down to look at her. “You’ll take care of yourself. Eat something healthy every once in a while, get some sleep, and be happy. Don’t let his, don’t let me ruin your life. Keep living, keep going.” Seo-jeong reminds him, her voice fading to a raspy croak.
“But you are my life, how am I supposed to live without my life?”
“You’ve done it before.”
“No,” he shakes his head.
“Find someone to love with by the ocean, be happy.”
“There is no such thing as happiness without you.”
“Yes…” Seo-jeong trails off as her eyes glaze over. Her fingertips slip from his face. Her chest falls one last time as air fails enters her body. A remaining tear trails down into the pool of her jet-black hair. Her lips part as the color drains from her face.
“No,” Pil-seong begs as he bring sher face to his chest, cradling her body in his arms. Sobs rack his body in a fit of despair. A scream erupts from his throat in protest of her unmoving body. “Don’t leave me,” he cries quietly into her hair.
~~~~~
( One month later)
Small memories fin their ways through the cracks of the remaining veil of her spell. He remembers the dates she forced him to take nad the numerous times they ate at the convenience store. The moment she had lifted it, he know who she was, felt wat she meant to him, but didn’t fully remember everything. He just felt, knew that she was his life and his heart ached more than his brain fully understood.
Sitting at the same table of the convenience store, ramen steaming in an instant cup in front of him, evoking countless memories.
~
“Wanna know something?” Seo-jeong had asked as she placed her ramen on the table and took her seat across from him.
“Sure,” he answered casually.
“Ever since I was little, I’ve always wanted a house by the ocean. The house would be on a hill, with the ocean at the bottom of it. Maybe the house would be blue, not bright, but a faint skye blue. And the man I loved would sit lazily on a rocking chair, outside in the breeze. The man would crack jokes and I would laugh, even at the bad ones. Then I would force htat lazy, lovely man to get up and dance with me down by the ocean. He would let out his complaints and protests, bu secretly he would love it,” Seo-jeong pauses, looking out the window at nothing in particular. “But now, I can't have it. I can’t even be with the man I’m in love with,” she says as she looks at him, defeated.
“Why does it have to be like this?” Pil-seong whines, but he already knows the answer.
“You already know. Shamans can’t be in love, it distracts them from their purpose and prevents them from being a full servant of their duty. But here I am, fully and totally in love with a man I can never be with,” she lets out a short, sarcastic laugh.
Pil-seong breaks her gaze, looking down, fighting back tears. “After all of this is over, I’ll get you that house, and stay with you. I’ll tell you awful jokes, and I’ll dance with you on the beach until I can’t stand anymore.”
“Pil-seong you know-”
“Just let me believe that, even if that dream is already gone. Let’s hold onto it for just one more second.” Pil-seong said sadly, knowing she’ll never get that house, and he’ll never get to the chance to be that man.
~
The sound of the store bell ringing takes him from his memory.
I’m sorry Seo-jeong. I’m going to join you sooner than you wanted.