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"Taehyungie! Tae Tae! I was told my baby is here for a visit" Jimin shouts as he opens the door to Taehyung's room. He is greeted by a loud bark and tiny steps excitedly running at the sound of his voice.
The members have been given a few days off as they prepare for their comeback. Well, technically it isn't really an "off" but more like time for them to refresh and maybe finish the things their meant to work on individually for the album.
"Tannie! My baby!" Jimin squeals as he picks up Yeontan and peppers the pup’s face with kisses.
"Ohh, you've grown so much again. What have you been eating? How did you get this big and heavy?" Jimin coos at Yeontan as the pup bounces excitedly in his arms, licking his face and neck and has Jimin giggling.
Taehyung smiles fondly at the two as he takes out a shirt to wear from his closet. He had just come out of the shower when Jimin barreled in not sparing a glance at his state of undress, all focus on the pup who is now busy playing fetch for him. Yeontan bounces back to Jimin, the toy tiger Namjoon has given Yeontan as a gift dangling from his teeth - the two now an excited mess on the floor.
"These two puppies." Taehyung mutters fondly as he picks his laptop up and carries it to his bed.
"What are you doing?" Jimin asks as he climbs up on the bed, Yeontan following him and settling in between them.
"Just searching stuff" Taehyung answers.
"What stuff?" Jimin persists and with eyebrows waggling adds, "Should I cover Tannie's eyes? I cannot let you corrupt Tannie's innocent and precious eyes!"
"Aish!" Taehyung says as he playfully pinches Jimin's left cheek "You pervert! I'm just searching about Malta. We'll be filming Bon Voyage 3 there remember?"
Jimin giggles settling in the bed, leaning his head on Taehyung's shoulder as he peeks over the tabs open in Taehyung's browser. "Hmmm, what have you searched for so far?"
"Just places I want to go to and things I want to do and food I want to eat! Ahh, I can't believe we're leaving in a couple of weeks again. It feels like it's only been a while since we came back from Saipan." Taehyung complains.
"Ha! You say that but for all I know you're very excited at all the pictures you can take there and that you are already planning for the exact time and angle to take them." Jimin quips, knowing well how excited Taehyung is about practicing his photography skills every time they travel.
Taehyung just laughs at his best friend's retort. He really can't deny that considering how he has been going over different reviews and images to create the perfect pictures he has in mind. The translations are quite off but he really can't pester Namjoon now over such mundane things especially because he knows his hyung is busy preparing for their comeback. Not that he's not busy preparing too, just that Namjoon is busier - you know, being producer and leader.
"And speaking of Saipan," Jimin pulls him out of his thoughts "we have to be teammates this time! I won't tolerate you choosing a different team again!" Jimin whines with a pout.
Yeontan follows with his own whine so attuned to Jimin's mood Taehyung is seriously doubting if Yeontan is still his pet or now Jimin's with how much his best friend dotes on the overgrown pup.
"Aish, Tannie stop that! Tannie!" Jimin squeals as Yeontan peppers his face with small licks.
Yeontan is still his pet after all, Taehyung muses, if Yeontan has the urge to wipe every pout off Jimin's face as much as he does.
===
There's only a couple of days left before they leave for Malta and Taehyung has searched all that he could about the place but he feels no excitement now. It has been a long day, they finished recording some of the songs for their new album with a few tweaks here and there. Taehyung is tired and had every intention to fall on his bed as soon as he came home but sleep is the last thing on his mind right now.
Taehyung is in the bathroom, sprawled on the floor, phone gripped tight as he stares blankly. Unbelieving, forcing the words that mock back at him into illusions.
"No! That's not true! That cannot be!" he whimpers.
"Taehyungie! Tae-Tae! Kookie, Seokjin hyung and I are going out, do you want to come with us or do you want me to get you anything?" Jimin calls from Taehyung's door.
He's met with silence. Jimin knows Taehyung is tired but he does not want his best friend to fall asleep without washing and changing his clothes (again).
"Aish, don't tell me you fell asleep without washing again. This kid!" Jimin reprimands as he opens the door only to see no one inside.
"Uhh, where is he? He did not go out without telling anyone, right?" Jimin worries.
And then he hears it - a whimper followed by a broken sob and he whips his head towards the direction of Taehyung's bathroom.
Tentatively he steps towards it "Taehyungie?"
A much louder sob this time.
"Tae Tae?"
Jimin is nearing Taehyung's bathroom now. He is sure his best friend is inside and that something is wrong - very wrong as his Taehyung senses tingle and he feels sudden coldness wash over him.
"Tae, what's wrong?", he asks outside the bathroom door.
And like a broken dam Taehyung releases a loud sob. Jimin can hear him crying really hard now. It hurts Jimin to listen to Taehyung cry so brokenly. His instincts want him to kick the door open, to find out what has Taehyung feeling this torn. But he knows Taehyung needs this time alone, knows that he will tell Jimin when he's ready. So they stay there like that - Taehyung sobbing loudly inside the bathroom and Jimin sitting patiently by the door, silent tears streaming down his face. He vaguely sees Jungkook and Seokjin check on them and he waves them away with plea in his eyes.
After some time, Taehyung finally opens the door. He looks so broken - bloated face, red, puffy eyes and tear streaks on his cheeks. "So beautiful still", the back of Jimin's mind comments as he gathers Taehyung in his arms wordlessly and Taehyung falls pliantly into them.
Jimin waits for Taehyung to talk but Taehyung finds it hard to speak the words out loud, they'll feel more real that way and he's not sure he's ready to face that reality yet. But he knows Jimin is waiting for him to say anything, he knows Jimin will understand, will help him through this one as he has always done for him.
"Jimin..", Taehyung starts and Jimin looks at him with the same pain and anguish reflected in his eyes. It has always been like this for them - they tend to mirror what the other feels even when they do not know the reason behind the feelings.
Taehyung snuggles back into Jimin's arms. "Jimin.. my grandfather.."
Jimin instictively hugs Taehyung tighter while gently stroking his back, silently urging him to continue.
"My grandfather...it's.. it's bad.. very bad..." Taehyung cannot continue as words got caught in his throat. He thrusts his phone to Jimin instead, his father's message glaring at them.
"Oh Taehyungie" a sob escapes Jimin's lips as he reads the message. He knows Taehyung needs him to be strong now but he can't help but cry. He knows how much Taehyung loves his grandfather and recalls all the tales Taehyung told about him. Jimin has met him before. He is such a great man, has been a great influence in Taehyung's life, has taught him to appreciate the beauty in all things. "Was a great man", Jimin corrects himself as tears keep streaming down his face.
They stay there for a while seeking comfort and warmth in each other's arm. After a while Jimin says, "Let's call your father now".
Jimin sleeps in Taehyung's bed that night. Taehyung sleeps fitfully but a hand is there to soothe him every single time he wakes up.
===
"Jimin called earlier, said he wanted to come with you here but they had to fly tonight to Malta to film" Taehyung's father says when he arrives at Daegu. Jimin after all these years still has his father's number on speed dial.
He sends Jimin a message "I'm home now."
Jimin replies in an instant as if he has been waiting for Taehyung to text. He probably has been with how worried he was of Taehyung, how tightly he held him when they parted earlier.
"I really wish I could come with you, Tae" Jimin had said, eyes misty with tears. He wouldn't dare let them fall if he didn't want to have a bawling Taehyung in his arms. Now isn't the best time for that with them standing by their front door and their manager waiting just outside. They settled for hugging each other tighter a few more moments instead.
Jimin pushes his shades up his nose. It may be a bit strange to still wear shades at this time inside the airport but he supposes he can get away with it and credit it to fashion. He does not really want to have fans asking why his eyes are red and puffy. Taehyung and his family do not want to make anything public anyway. Jimin has to do his part.
"I'm home now" Taehyung's message says.
Home may never ever be the same to Taehyung now what with both his grandparents - the people he loved and who loved him so much - gone. Jimin muses.
Fighting off the tears that are threatening to fall, Jimin sniffles and pushes his shades up again.
"We're in the airport now. See you soon!"
"Give my hugs to everyone"
"Take care! I love you, Tae"
===
It's the day Taehyung is supposed to fly to Malta and catch up to the rest of the members. His phone has been going off every minute or so.
"Take care, son. Have a safe flight. Try to enjoy and come back safe" a message from his father, always wanting his son to be happy.
"Don't forget your passport and don't get lost this time!" That one from Jimin.
The other members send in their messages too. Most of which are jabs at how he got lost during their trip to Europe when he had to go on his own too. Taehyung knows the members are worried about him but they try to play it off by teasing him. It is a trip, albeit for work, that they're meant to enjoy together anyway.
It is a long flight but Taehyung decides to sleep through it. The transfer from Turkey to Malta is also done uneventfully. There have been a few fans who recognized him but he's grateful they kept their distance. He spends his layover going over all the videos Jimin has sent and replays that one particular video where all the members are saying “I love you” to him. Jimin has sent him a couple of selcas too. Taehyung smiles and coos at Jimin showing one picture to the camera that’s been filming him and commenting at how cute the other is.
As soon as he gets off the plane in Malta, he receives a barrage of messages.
"Tae, have you landed already?"
"Your flight is supposed to land 20 minutes ago. Are you here now?"
"Hey! Why are you not responding?"
"Aish! Don't you dare get lost again!"
The last message earns a chuckle from him. "Jimin, ever the worrier", he thinks as he presses the call button.
Jimin predictably answers on the first ring.
"Tae! Where are you? Why haven't you responded to my messages? A van is there to pick you up. Have you seen it?"
"Jimin, calm down. I had to pick up my luggage and it took some time" Taehyung assures Jimin as he walks out of the arrival area to look for the said van. "Oh I see the van now."
"Is it - " Jimin answers only to be cut off by Taehyung.
"And yes, before you go off about me riding a different van, I recognize our staff, in fact they are waving at me now", Taehyung adds as he waves back.
"Alright" Jimin concedes. " I'll wait for you. Come fast! We'll eat together."
===
"How was your trip today? Did you and Kookie have fun?" Jimin asks as they settle on the rooftop of their hotel, overlooking the sea.
Taehyung has been in Malta for a full day now. He arrived to the members setting up a group dinner for them to eat together. They talked about the places they've been to so far and recommended for Taehyung to visit too. Conversations were easy and light, no one mentioned his loss. Aside from the tight hugs he received from all the members and even their managers when he arrived, Taehyung is glad no one has asked him anything so far. Even Jimin has kept quiet save for the few glances he keeps giving Taehyung.
Now they're sitting together on the rooftop lazily sipping on their cocktails. The moon is bright as it reflects on the calm sea. The night's mood a stark contrast to the chaos of the day.
Today, after their schedule, Taehyung went on a side trip with their youngest, Jungkook. Taehyung wanted to go with Jimin but the latter fell flat on the bed as soon as they got home and he did not have the heart to wake him up. Besides Jungkook is the more adventurous one and he definitely enjoyed their time together.
"Uh yeah. We went to this place uphill with rocky terrain."
"Oh, really? What did you do there?" Jimin inquires.
"Well, first there was a couple of guys on a jeep and they handed us cans of energy drink. They asked us where we're from and we said Korea.. uhmm, I think they were actually filming us too -" Taehyung recounts.
"Filming?" Jimin interrupts eyes laced with worry.
"Oh no nothing like that paparazzi kind of thing you might be thinking.. they're just filming. I think they do that every time they give out the cans. They uploaded it on Instagram. I saw some fans sharing it on Twitter. I'll show you. " Taehyung explains as he pulls out his phone to show the said video to Jimin.
"Uhh.. okay if you say so..", Jimin concedes uncertainly. "So energy drink huh? Is that why you're being all giddy and buzzing today?"
"No! Not really. Well, Kookie and I rode this giant jeep. It's so big and tall. It's similar to what we rode in Dubai but it feels a little bit more scary? First we went up to the highest part of the hill and speeded down the rocky terrain. It was so bumpy I thought I would fall off. There was even a time when it got too rough I almost lost my grip on the bar." Taehyung animatedly recounts his adventure with large gestures and sound effects.
"I was thinking that if you were there with us, you would probably be holding tight to me with your eyes closed screaming at us to let you get off.. Hahahaha.. Please! Please! Let me get off! Please! Ahhhh..." Taehyung imitates Jimin's higher-pitched voice as he doubles over laughing and clapping excitedly at the thought.
"Aish! This brat! You really won't let me live that down, huh?" Jimin playfully hits Taehyung as the latter continues to cackle shamelessly at the image of his best friend holding on for dear life. He doesn't mind though as he smiles at how Taehyung is finally laughing freely again, even if it is at his expense.
They talk until around midnight sharing about the little things from their day but not once do they address the elephant in the room. Jimin is itching to know but he supposes Taehyung is not yet ready. He hugs him a little tighter and lets his touch linger a moment longer as they bid each other good night. A silent promise that he understands and that he is here whenever Taehyung is ready. Taehyung returns the gesture with a soft smile.
===
"Jiminie! Chim Chim!" Taehyung calls loudly as he skips over to Jimin in the kitchen.
"Why are you so loud this morning?" Jimin asks as he pours his cereals on a bowl.
"I want burgers! Let's eat burgers. Let's grab some at McDonald's!" Taehyung whines while pulling on Jimin's arm causing the latter to spill some of the cereals on the table.
Jimin puts down the cereal box and stares incredulously at his best friend. "Seriously Tae, we go to practically the other side of the world and you ask me to eat at McDonald's with you? Didn't you say you searched for things you want to eat here? McDonald's burger? Seriously?"
"But Jimin.. please..please.. I really want some McDonald's burger" Taehyung continues to whine a full pout now on display.
They try to stare each other down - Taehyung puts on his most adorable puppy eyes and Jimin tries his best to pull out his deadly stage stare that has fans squealing but promptly loses because he can never resist a Taehyung who looks like that. (The same as how Taehyung can never resist Jimin's puppy eyes. Maybe if Jimin pulled out that look instead he would have had better chances.)
"Fine! Fine! We'll get them later!" Jimin succumbs and Taehyung does a happy dance chanting "Burgers! Burgers!" around the kitchen.
Jimin shakes his head as he looks at his best friend. He's happy to see Taehyung in a bright mood. He knows Taehyung is still grieving but if these little things help him cope, Jimin is more than willing to indulge him.
===
The day has been filled with many activities, most of which Jimin and Taehyung spent together and yes, they did get the burgers Taehyung adamantly whined about that morning. Now they're gathered with the rest of the members to eat dinner together just like the other night. Conversations are loud and easy, each one trying to tell how his adventures are better than the other members'. They laugh and eat together, enjoying the last couple of days left in the island.
Amidst the cacophony, Jimin catches Taehyung looking at him across the table. They stare at each other for awhile seemingly conversing in silence.
After dinner, Jimin walks up to Taehyung. "Do you want to go for a walk?"
They walk around the area for a while, looking at trinkets store and listening to street musicians. At one time, Taehyung even goes up the microphone to sing a song while Jimin dutifully whips out his phone to capture this moment of his best friend.
After wandering around for some time, they arrive at the viewing deck overlooking the sea. They look on lost at its dark vastness, the distant lights of buildings and ferries mirroring the stars in the night sky. The moon is red and full. Jimin was about to point it out to Taehyung when -
"You know my grandfather once told me that the best way to know if the strawberry is sweet is by its stem, right? I've never picked a sour strawberry again ever since he told me that." Taehyung suddenly speaks.
Jimin turns to Taehyung but finds that his friend is staring straight ahead seemingly lost to the memories.
"You remember that one time you came over to visit and we picked strawberries and he taught us how to make jams? We brought back so many bottles to the dorm that we put strawberrry jams in almost everything the members joked about how they felt like their farts smelled like strawberries." Taehyung chuckles.
Jimin does not dare interrupt.
"He was one of the people who encouraged me to become an idol. He and grandmother both had so much faith in me even when I did not believe I could be one. They were the first people to celebrate when I told them I was recruited. They pulled me in and hugged me tight and told me how excited they were to see me on TV. That I have to tell them of all my shows so they could tell the neighbors too."
"Remember that time when I was having a hard time dealing with all the rumors and negative comments I had to go back to Daegu for a while? He pulled me aside one night and told me that he didn't know that celebrity life could be that harsh. He said that if he knew I'd be that hurt he wouldn't have encouraged me to become an idol. He never wanted to see me hurt. He never told me if he knew about the comments but there was pain in his eyes."
Tears start to well up Jimin's eyes and he tries to steel himself. Taehyung on the other hand shows no emotions as he continues to stare straight ahead, unseeing and still lost in his memories. It feels like they are in their own bubble, the world outside a mere backdrop as Taehyung recounts the memories he has of his grandfather.
"He told me that no matter what the world may think, I would always be the Taehyung he loved and if it gets too tough out there I could always come home."
They stay there for a while as Taehyung continues to go through the moments he shared with his grandfather. Jimin listens and makes occasional small comments not wanting to pull Taehyung out of his reverie. He knows Taehyung needs to go through them to accept this new reality in his life.
As the night deepens and the buzz of Malta dwindles, Jimin reaches for Taehyung’s and they make their way back.
===
They're back in the place they rented. Jimin is lying on his bed, playing some mindless game on his phone. Their Seokjin hyung he’s sharing the room with is already fast asleep on his own bed - he probably had a little bit too much to drink when he went out on his own tonight.
A soft knock interrupts the quiet of the room.
"Come in" he calls out.
Taehyung opens the door and wordlessly pads over to Jimin. Jimin pulls back the blanket in silent invitation and Taehyung climbs on the bed and snuggles up to Jimin's side burying his face on the latter's chest.
They stay that way for a while with Taehyung's arm curled around Jimin's waist and Jimin gently stroking Taehyung's back.
A sniffle. "They're both gone now, Jimin" Taehyung says.
"I feel so lost right now. I know nobody's meant to live forever but I guess I was never prepared to lose them both."
"Nobody is ever prepared to lose our loved ones, Tae" Jimin softly answers.
"They... they have been so much a part of who I am that I feel like I lost a part of myself too..I know I haven't been with them in the last years.. I..I haven't been with them Jimin and that makes it worse." Taehyung sobs as guilt slowly eats at him.
"Hush Tae. Yes, you haven't been with them physically but you have always been together here" Jimin gently lays his hand over Taehyung's heart. "Even though you were physically apart, you were never truly apart because you never stopped loving them and they loved you just as much too. You showed them that love in every possible way you could. You were the best grandson you could ever be for them and they were most proud of you. Remember the times you told me about how they would just pull you to the side and tell you that you're doing well and that they're very proud of you?"
"But home will never be the same, Jimin."
"Yes, Tae. It seems that way but it doesn't have to be that way."
"What do you mean?" Taehyung asks as he lifts his head off Jimin's chest.
"Home doesn't have to be anywhere specific, you know. Wouldn't it be better if we had our home with us everywhere we go?
Taehyung furrows his brows at that as he continues to stare at his best friend "Like a turtle?"
"Silly", Jimin lets out a small chuckle as he looks fondly at Taehyung "if you want to think that way...I'd like to think of home as that feeling that blooms in my heart and makes it full - that warmth that tells me no matter what, I am accepted and loved.. that I can simply be myself, an assurance that I can be at my most vulnerable and still be welcomed and loved. A feeling that I can take anywhere with me and indulge in anytime. That is home for me."
"Your grandparents loved you unconditionally Tae, you loved them too, love them still. That feeling doesn't have to end now that they're gone. Take their love with you, let their love fill your home, Tae."
Silent tears stream down Taehyung's face as he listens to Jimin. He feels like the weight is lifted off his chest as it is slowly filled by a warmth that soothes and comforts. Once again, he is thankful to have Jimin - his best friend, his soulmate. Jimin seems to always know the right words to say, the right way to dig into Taehyung's heart. Taehyung is overwhelmed with gratefulness and love for the one person he allows himself to be this vulnerable, to the person he knows he will have no matter what.
Taehyung seeks Jimin's eyes and holds his gaze.
"I love you, Jimin"
"I love you too, Tae"
===
They are back in Korea now and are busy preparing for their comeback. There's a lot of buzz around the Love Yourself:Answer album what with the world looking more keenly on them and with the albun wrapping up the whole Love Yourself series that they have worked on for more than two years. The members are equally excited about how different this title track is from their previous ones. It's totally dope if Yoongi were asked to describe it.
The studio is teeming with life as sets are arranged and the members' make up are retouched. They are currently shooting for the album jacket. The concepts are diverse and the members love how they get to wear different outfits. They have been shooting for hours but the atmosphere is light, the members playfully teasing each other, scrutinizing each other's outfits, taking silly pictures and laughing with each other.
It's the sunshine line's turn now. Jhope, Jimin and Taehyung are posed sitting together. Jimin has one arm wrapped around Taehyung's shoulder, solid and firm. His other arm dangling casually and a thigh on top of Taehyung's own. The two of them are no strangers to this kind of intimacy and thus there's no awkwardness in how easily their body parts fall into place. Still Taehyung thinks that if Hoseok isn't part of this shoot, their pose seem a bit too.. intimate for the cameras, so couple-like if he must say so. But no one seems to think the same. Everyone - the members, the staff, the production team - moves around like normal, probably used to seeing Jimin and Taehyung in each other's spaces.
Taehyung lifts his head off of Jimin's chest to steal him a glance while the director is tinkering with the setting. Jimin feeling Taehyung's gaze looks fondly down at him with a small smile on his face. They stared at each other for only a couple of seconds but a certain warmth blooms in Taehyung's heart - a sense of assurance, a bind firmly founded in everything that is both Taehyung and Jimin.
As Taehyung leans his head back on Jimin's chest and closes his eyes, there's a still, small voice that says, "Home".