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Kakashi resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He honestly hated being recognized most of the time, for exactly this reason. He hated being hit on by these sycophantic trolls, their faces caked with makeup, batting their eyes and giggling in the most obnoxious manner possible in the very deluded belief that it would make him want to sleep with them. If he were being completely honest, right now he was just really regretting the fact that shinobi weren’t allowed to use their abilities on civilians, or he would knock this bitch out.
Now, he absolutely didn’t believe in using his strength against someone who so clearly couldn’t hold their own against him, and normally, the very idea appalled him. However, he had never come across a civilian quite this persistent… or obnoxious. He had already tried everything with this girl, and nothing seemed to be working. He had tried telling her he wasn’t interested, but she had refused to believe him, insisting that ‘it’s okay to be shy’. Any attempts at convincing her he was not, in any capacity, shy had failed miserably. He had told her he was asexual, gay, hadn’t showered in a week. He had pulled the ‘I’ve killed people’ routine, which disturbingly enough had only seemed to make her more interested. He had even tried convincing her he was in the middle of a sex change. Nothing seemed to work.
He was getting desperate. All he had wanted when he came to this lonely little hole-in-the-wall bar he liked was to have a drink to wind down from an annoying mission. It hadn’t been hard in the least, just very taxing. He had been escorting a caravan of wealthy merchants, and the adult son of one of the merchants had spent the entire time trying to make Kakashi spar with him and loudly belittling him about how Kakashi ‘clearly knew he wasn’t up to par with him’ when he didn’t get his way. Fortunately for the little fucker, the people who had hired them were regular clients, so it was expected that Kakashi be on his best behavior so they would continue to hire them (which also meant he couldn’t even use his Icha Icha to distract himself). Otherwise, he would have knocked his ass out in one punch.
And now, even his attempts at winding down were thwarted by this crazy viper who wouldn’t let him go. At this point, all he wanted was to go home and sleep, and let this awful week end, but it was starting to feel like that would never happen. He felt someone else step up to the bar behind him. It was obviously a shinobi, a familiar chakra, though he couldn’t quite place it. He started to turn around, planning to beg for help and offer, but before he could, a hand was placed on his shoulder. “There you are, honey, I’ve been looking all over for you.”
He turned quickly, only to see his former subordinate from ANBU. “Tenzo,” he sighed with relief. “I’ve been waiting for you all night.”
The viper’s eyes danced between them. “Wait… you two? Really?” It was obvious from the look on her face that she didn’t believe it.
“What? You don’t think a plain man like me can get a god like this beautiful creature here?” Tenzo challenged.
Kakashi looked affronted. “Or perhaps she doesn’t believe that a small-statured man like myself is capable of satisfying a man of your bulk. Either way, one of us should be offended.” He resisted the urge to smirk, even though his mask would hide it. With Tenzo here, this was actually getting fun.
She just smirked at them. “Then prove it.”
Kakashi frowned. “And why exactly is that…” he started.
At the same time, Tenzo said, “If you insist.” Kakashi’s words were cut off as his stool was swiveled towards Tenzo, the woman’s view of his face blocked as Tenzo uncovered it and pressed his lips to Kakashi’s. His eyes widened, but he melted with a moan as a tongue quickly swept into his mouth. Tenzo’s hand supported the back of his neck, his other weaving its way around his waist to pull him to the edge of the stool. He plundered Kakashi’s mouth as the other man forgot how to breathe, pulling back to allow Kakashi air as he kissed his way down the jonin’s throat, skillfully hiding Kakashi’s face in the curve of his own neck.
A knee pressed against Kakashi’s, pushing them apart. It kept moving forward until it was pressed up right against Kakashi’s groin, and the silver-haired man moaned again at the combination of a hot tongue on his throat and the thigh pressing against his already impossibly hard erection. How long had it been since he had been intimate with anyone, he wondered. Obviously too long, judging by the way he was whimpering and writhing like a bitch in heat when Tenzo was barely even touching him.
Tenzo’s ministrations ceased, and he whined, pressing his forehead against the broad chest before him to catch his breath. When Tenzo pulled back, he caught the scents surrounding him, remembering that they were in public, and a blush rose high on his cheeks, over the top of his mask that he had no idea when it had come back up. The horrid woman had, thankfully, disappeared. Tenzo was smirking down at him, eyes taking in his body lustfully and licking his lips. “You know, all the years I spent imagining that… I never imagined it would be that amazing .”
Kakashi tried to process what he was saying. “Wait… imagined? Years?”
Tenzo chuckled. “Come now, Kakashi, you don’t expect me to believe that you weren't aware of the way I watched you? Lusted after you? I was hardly subtle.”
“Subtle enough that nothing ever happened, apparently,” Kakashi muttered, frustrated.
Tenzo laughed breathily. “Does that mean you wanted something, too?”
“Well, I… I mean, I was your superior. It would have been wrong…”
Tenzo raised his brows. “So you did want me.”
Kakashi huffed out a breath. “Fine. Ok, maybe I did want you. A little.”
Tenzo smirked, slamming the drink he’d only just gotten. “Great, glad that's settled. Now, should we see whether a man of your small stature can satisfy a man of my bulk?” he asked teasingly.
Kakashi looked around for just a moment before he took his outstretched hand, smiling. “Oh, I have no doubts that I’ll be very capable.”