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“Ed?” Jim asked as he froze in the doorway. He had been rushing in from the melee in the GCPD lobby to place files on Captain Essen’s desk when he noticed the young forensic scientist was sitting on the floor in the corner of the empty captain’s office.
“Oh,” came a quiet reply, before Ed scrambled to his feet, clearing his throat to speak at a normal volume, “Detective Gordon. Hello.”
Jim trailed his eyes over the man’s frame before meeting his gaze. Ed always looked so put together, but currently...he looked like he had just escaped the clutches of Hell itself. His dark hair, usually neatly gelled back, was ruffled and loose, his glasses were halfway off of his face, revealing red eyes with deep, dark bags beneath them, his lab coat was on the floor beside him, his tie was undone, and his whole body was shaking slightly. He seemed to be trying desperately to regain his composure, but the best he was managing was a weak, unconvincing smile.
“Are you alright, Ed?” he inquired carefully.
It took far longer than it typically would for him to respond, his eyes vacantly darting from side to side as he tried to decode the words he heard.
“Right as rain,” Ed replied in a hoarse voice.
“Why don’t you sit down?” Jim offered, pulling out the captain’s chair and gesturing for Ed to take a seat. Essen wouldn’t mind; she had a soft spot for the kid.
Ed hesitated before curtly nodding and taking a seat in the chair.
“Thank you,” he whispered as he sat down. Jim took the seat across from him, doing his best to portray a comforting demeanor. He didn’t think Ed really picked up on that stuff, but he thought it would be best to at least try to seem friendly in case he did.
“What’s wrong?”
“...Nothing….important,” he mumbled, glancing down at the floor.
“Ed, you know you can tell me if something is upsetting you, right?” When Ed met Jim’s gaze, his eyes were vacant, as if he did not see the detective in front of him. “...Ed?”
“Sorry. I—” Ed shook his head and met Jim’s eyes again. This time they seemed to be focused. “What did you say?”
“I said you can tell me if there is something wrong. I won’t judge you,” he offered. Jim knew he wasn’t great at the whole comforting thing, but Ed seemed so out of it. He didn’t seem like Ed.
“Thank you.”
Jim looked at the scientist expectantly.
“Oh,” he murmured, noticing Jim’s anticipatory gaze, “It got loud out there.”
“...Yes. It did…” Jim had no clue how that was related to Ed’s current state.
“I—Sometimes I—” Ed stuttered, hitting his thigh with his fist absentmindedly. He took a breath and started over, “I don’t like loud noises.”
“...Ah,” the detective replied, hoping he sounded like he was following Ed’s reasoning. He wasn’t.
“I—My brain doesn’t...process that stuff normally,” he said, averting his gaze to study a spot on the floor.
“I didn’t know that, Ed. Is there anything I can do to help?” he offered. It made sense. Ed was always quick to hide from loud noises, tense up at the sudden brightening of lights, always noticed when Jim switched his soap. Gordon had always found it strange that Ed paid attention to those details, but he was beginning to wonder if Ed was just unable to block out those details.
“No...It just gets...overwhelming, you know? It’s like being stuck in the middle of a crosswalk on a busy street. There are people pushing past you—a million different conversations at once, and you hear all of them, all as loudly as if they were speaking to you...but you can’t understand any of them. And their footsteps—it’s like someone took a recording of those footsteps and turned up the volume to one hundred. They echo and pulsate and you hear them like the people are walking around inside of your ear, and it jostles your brain around until it’s too jumbled to make sense of anything. And then all the cars start honking their horns at once, and it’s only then that you realize that you are in the middle of the street, alone. Everyone else finished walking across, and now there are cars rushing past you every which way, and there’s no escape. You’re just…”
“Stuck?” Jim offered.
“Yeah. Stuck.”
The two men sat in an awkward silence for several moments before Jim opted to break it, reaching out and putting a hand on Ed’s shoulder. “Does Essen know?”
“No, I have not alerted Captain Essen to this issue.”
“Why?”
“I don’t want to be…” Ed seemed to be fighting back tears, and Gordon felt more sympathy for the poor, awkward kid than he ever had. “...a burden,” Ed finished, tearfully.
“Ed, you are not a burden. There are a lot of people who just do things differently. They think differently, feel differently. They make adjustments to help them get through life more easily. If you tell Captain Essen about this, we could help make sure your job is any more difficult than it needs to be...or at least, not in this area. If you are uncomfortable talking to her yourself, I can talk to her for you.”
“You would do that?”
“Yes,” Jim replied with a genuine smile, “Ed, there is no good reason for you to suffer unnecessarily. We would be happy to help you.”
“Thank you, Detective,” Ed replied, abruptly standing up and wrapping Jim in an awkward hug. He pulled away quickly and offered his hand to the detective instead. “You’re pretty good at this whole comforting thing, aren’t you?”
“Lee’s rubbing off on me,” Gordon admitted fondly.