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Mike would be lying if he said he didn’t internally cringe whenever Claire Matthews was brought up in conversation. The Bureau was surprisingly quiet without Ryan there to stir things up. Actually, it’s probably because Ryan was gone that his co-workers even mentioned Claire anymore.
After their attack, Claire was once again put into protective custody. This time it was both her and Joey who got complete identity makeovers. As if they hadn’t been through enough, now they had to move halfway across the country. Mike didn’t even know where they had ended up this time, though part of him was grateful for that. He didn’t want to end up in another Fight Club re-enactment.
Claire was still a touchy subject between him and Ryan. They almost never mentioned her, and even if they did it was in passing. Still, Mike knew that her leaving had hit Ryan hard. And he’d be lying if he said he didn’t think about them together. The idea of Ryan leaving him for Claire made him nervous.
Nervous enough that he actually (for some incredibly stupid reason) mentioned it to Ryan late one night while they were curled up together in bed.
“I know you still love her.” He could have bitten his tongue off and bled to death at that point. It probably would have been less painful than watching Ryan’s face twist. Mike wanted to hide and never come out again. Why did he have to bring that up after sex? Why nowof all times? He braced himself for the inevitable, unable to look directly at Ryan.
“I do,” Ryan admitted, voice gruff. “But it’s in the past now. She needs to move on. So do I.”
“So this is just you moving on?” Mike couldn’t help that he sounded worried. All his anxieties about their relationship were resurfacing after being buried deep for so long. With a sigh, Ryan wrapped an arm around Mike’s waist. He winced as the movement stretched his scar, but pulled Mike flush against him.
“I still love her, but I love you too, Mike. Whatever I had with Claire…I’ve accepted that it’s over. I need to move on.” He nuzzled into Mike’s neck, lips brushing over the sensitive spot under his jaw. “I wouldn’t trade a single day with you to get it back.” Ryan was nothing if not loyal to the people he cared about. And he cared about Mike now, more than anything.
Mike pulled away, turning to face Ryan. “But…”
“No buts. I’m here now.” He cupped Mike’s face in one hand, thumb tracing over Mike’s lower lip. “I’m not going to leave you, Mike. Yesterday is in the past.” Ryan knew he had a tendency to dwell on all of his mistakes. Claire was probably the worst one, and part of him would never be able to get past what he had done to her. But he didn’t want to be stuck in the past forever. And Mike was certainly a peek of what his future could be like.