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Published:
2019-05-26
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All or Nothing

Summary:

ENDGAME SPOILERS

What if the outcome of Vormir had been different? Natasha's POV of the final battle.

Notes:

For such a short fic, this took me practically a month to write. I'm so rusty!

Basically I don't agree that Natasha had a satisfying conclusion to her character arc, so this is my take on a much better ending for her. It's a "what if Clint had died instead" fic, but while I would have preferred this he's still my boy so please no Clint hate if you comment.

Major thanks to Ev for all her encouragement! Much love darling!

Work Text:

Her lungs burned with every breath as she pushed her way through the rubble to what had essentially become a battlefield. The air was grey with ash, but through it she could see the nightmare that awaited.  Thanos, a warship in the sky, an army at his back…all of that against so few Avengers that Natasha could count them on her fingers.  

How had this happened?  They had done everything right, they had sacrificed more than she would have ever been willing to, and they had done it, they had succeeded in reversing the snap.  And now… god, it was all for nothing.  If Thanos got that glove again, it would have all been for nothing.  Five years of pain and near solitude, pulling Tony away from his happy family, and Clint…

She could still see the last smile he had given her, burned just as permanently in her mind as the image of his broken body at the base of the cliff.  Any time they had fought in the past she had always been that little bit faster, that little bit better to edge out the win, but this time, with her life on the line, he had surprised her.  No holding his punches.  

She had lost.  Oh, how she had lost.

Clint had been the first person she could remember ever showing her kindness, the first to let her make her own choices and to treat her like a person, not a tool.  He went against his orders and took a chance on her, and she spent every day since trying to make sure she was worth the faith he put in her.  And now he was gone.  Just like that he was gone, and the world felt emptier, her heart felt hollow.  It was like a piece of her was missing, and she didn’t know how she was supposed to keep going, how she could possibly get through this hell on earth without him by her side.

But she would; she had to.  It couldn’t end this way.  Clint had given his life so they could get here, so they could fix everything; it couldn’t end like this, but what could she do?  Her batons were gone, her guns spent, and what good would they do her anyway against something like Thanos?  

A few yards away Thor was going one on one with the mad titan, but it was clear he was fading and wouldn’t last much longer.  Steve was down and struggling to get to his feet, and she could just make out the glint of Tony’s armour through all the ash, unmoving.  Everyone else was still trapped within the remnants of her home, so that left her.  

”You’re a spy, not a soldier. Now you want to wade into a war.  Why?”

She suddenly remembered Clint’s words from all those years ago, and they hit her hard, almost like a physical blow.  At the time it had been clear, but she hadn’t been able to admit it.  Loki had taken Clint, had messed with him, her family, and that had been enough.  Now Thanos did the same.  Her family had grown, and maybe she had no powers, no weapons, no fancy suit, but she was willing to wage a one woman war if it meant protecting what she had left.

Desperation gripped her heart in an iron fist as she scanned the battlefield, looking for any solution.  Then she saw it, just a few feet away, and before she could think about it, before the doubt could paralyze her, she was on her feet and running.  She reached it in seconds, fingers wrapping around the handle.

It’s lighter than I expected, was her only thought as she lifted Mjolnir high in the air.  

Power surged through her like lightening, sparking every nerve, heightening every sense. She had been raised a weapon, trained to kill without question, and the blood of so many people, guilty and innocent alike, forever stained her hands.  Since Clint had found her, though, and offered her another life, she had devoted it to atoning for those sins, to making herself better.  He had always believed in her, but she had never believed in herself, never truly thought it possible to wipe out that much red.  And now here she stood, the hammer of the gods in her hand, the weapon that could only be wielded by someone who was worthy.  Clint had been right all along.

If only she could tell him that.

With renewed strength, Natasha swung back her arm and let the hammer fly.  It surged through the air, striking Thanos hard and knocking him away from Thor.  Keeping her arm extended she called it back, elated when Mjolnir returned to her grip.  It wasn’t a fluke.  She was truly worthy.  

Thor met her eyes across the battlefield, his momentary confusion quickly replaced by surprise, then excitement and… was that pride?  He cheered as she threw it again, gathering up Stormbreaker and rejoining the fight.  Her, Thor, Tony, Steve; they fought hard and they fought valiantly, but it wasn’t enough to secure the win.  It wasn’t enough to vanquish the tyrant and his army.  They would not back down, though.  Earth’s Mightiest Heroes, they would fight to their dying breath, even if they had to do so alone. 

Luckily they weren’t alone.  

Just when it seemed they were making their last stand, all around them the air began to swirl, circles of light brightening the darkened sky.  Portals started opening all around them, an alien planet visible through one, Wakanda another, and when Sam’s voice reached Natasha’s ears, she smiled.  Relief and joy mixed with the loss and determination she had been feeling, renewed courage building with every figure who stepped through the portals to join them on the battlefield.  Sam, Wanda, T’Challa… they were all here.  All who had been dust, the 50%, were back.  We did it, Clint.  The world was whole again, and now they had to keep it that way.

From a few steps behind her Natasha heard Steve’s voice call “Avengers!” And she looked back over her shoulder at him.  Meeting her eyes he nodded and she smirked.  For five years she had been the one who tried to hold them together, the one to stay and keep fighting.  This was her team, her family.  She had earned this. Tightening her grip on Mjolnir she turned to face the enemy once more.  When she spoke her voice was confident.  Strong.

“Assemble.”