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This was it. This was the night Bellamy finally was going to propose to her.
You couldn’t say he knew Clarke was the one he wanted to spend his life with from the moment they met. Sure, he found her extremely attractive when he first saw the best friend his sister Octavia couldn’t stop rambling about. He even flirted with her, a decision he soon regretted when Clarke not only was unimpressed by his charm, but also called on his bullshit. Yes, Octavia thought they were perfect for each other and tried hooking them up, but that also ended up in a disaster; both Clarke and Bellamy believed they were the opposite sides of a coin and were incompatible. Clarke was stubborn and challenged him at every turn. They fought, argued, and Bellamy, being the immature asshat he was at 23, never had the courage to be the man Clarke believed in him to be. Instead, he left town to join the army.
But then, her father died. Octavia told him on the phone Jake died in a car accident; Clarke was blaming herself for getting enormously drunk and calling her father to take her home. So after he served, he came back home and couldn’t leave her, not when she cried herself to sleep in his arms the first night he was back. Eventually, the comfort became much more and here they were now, Bellamy crazily, irreversibly and undeniably in love with the princess from Phoenix.
He planned it all out. He had taken her out to her favorite restaurant, a small Italian bistro near Charles River, where they had their first date. After dessert, he would take out the ring. It was nothing special, but that was partly why he loved her; she always found joy in the simplest things. He didn’t even buy a ring; he was going to give her his mother’s ring, the one she gave him when he had introduced Clarke to her. They weren’t dating then, but her mother told him the way he looked at Clarke was the same way his father looked at her before he had died. Bellamy only laughed at her comment back then, but right now, he hadn’t been more grateful.
So, here they were now. As Bellamy reached to take Clarke’s hand and held her bare hand in his, his fingers curved around hers. Her hand was warm and soft, her touch made him shiver.
“You’re cynical and cranky and just… impossible. But the truth is, fighting with you is the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I love that you get cold even when it’s 100 degrees outside. I love that you change your mind thousand times and still return to your first choice when you order. I love the dimples around your pink cheeks when you laugh. I love waking up to you in my arms. I love the smell of your perfume on my clothes. I love that you’re the last person I think about before I sleep at night. I love how you’re so stubborn that you won’t agree with me even when you know I’m right. I love how you care about people who don’t deserve it. Most of all, I love that you love someone who had been so lonely so much that he doesn’t remember life before you. Clarke, you and me, we’re family and I – ”
“Finn?” Did she really just say that?
“What?” Bellamy was confused. Why would Clarke mention Finn? Not only she knew Bellamy hated him, but in the middle of his proposal?
Before Clarke could say anything, a firm hand on his shoulder helped him understand what horrible coincidence was exactly going on. “Fuck!” was the proper word in his mind as he turned around to see Finn, Clarke’s annoyingly naïve ex-boyfriend, and Raven, who looked as cross as he felt. This was not happening. But it was.
So what he couldn’t propose to her? She still was clueless right? The fact that that he studied hours to make it perfect for her, that he sweated for days in fear of Clarke finding out the ring when going through his drawers, and that it was Finn was who ruined the whole evening didn’t mattered. He had been thinking of a new method, a more intimate one without interruptions this time, for a week now. Finally, he decided to propose on their Saturday movie night. Since they met, they made up this ritual of watching cheesy horror movies with sketchy special effects. Popcorn, blankets, Clarke snuggling up and resting her head on his chest, make out sessions on the floor… That was special enough.
“Uh, Clarke I need to talk to you.” God, how was it possible that he was even more nervous than the first time?
“Sure honey, is it I-dropped-spaghetti-on-the-cushion-and-I-cant-turn-it-around-because-it-aready-has-a-meatball-stain-on-the-other-side kind of talk? You sound on edge.” She sat by him on the rug and stared curiously. Her eyes were steady and blue; they were everything she was: true and tender, sharp and witty, loving and kind.
“Oh no… I just wanted say that, um, okay look. When I met you, I was alone. I have protected Octavia and my mom for so long that I had never tasted the feeling of wishing something, someone, for yourself. I was afraid of hurting you, letting you down and not being able to live up to your expectation. You deserve so much better, Clarke, someone who’s less damaged and more emotionally available than I. But I can tell you; no one will love you more than me. Even when things get hard and you feel like giving up, you have to hang on to that decision, that choice to love each other. Even if it's only by a thread. I let that thread break once. This time, it won –.”
The phone rang. Bellamy closed his eyes in exasperation. Seriously? Was the universe screwing with him? Clarke looked at him expectantly, but he waved his hand, “Just answer it.” She looked confused, but still got up and went over to the desk.
“Oh hi, mom. How are you?” And here thought Bellamy that Miss Griffin actually liked him. He knew this was going to take long, ever since her dad died, Clarke held onto every opportunity to talk to her mother. They would be on the phone for hours whenever her hopefully-soon-to-be-mother-in-law called. So he went to the kitchen and busied himself with the dishes.
After what seemed like an eternity, Clarke came to the kitchen, wrapped her arms around his waist, and rested her head on his back. “So, what were you saying?” Bellamy let go of the soap, turned around, and hugged her back. She listened to his heartbeat as he kissed her forehead. Her hair smelled like roses. “Nothing important. It’s just… I love you, Clarke. You’re my best friend, and an incredible lover in the bed.” She laughed and hit him slightly on the back. He loved it when he made her laugh. “I know I said and done a lot of things, that I hurt you, but I promise, I'll never do that again. I’m just a boy, standing in front of a girl, asking her to love him back for the rest of days to –
For the third time, he was interrupted. By a doorbell. He didn’t care which idiot was banging furiously at the door, but he was a dead man walking. Clarke lifted her chin and looked sheepishly at Bellamy. “Hold that thought.” Then she left to answer the door. He was getting irritated by the second. Would he ever get the chance to propose to her? He ran his fingers through his hair, a nervous habit, and waited for Clarke to return. It was probably the pizza delivery guy anyway. He saw Clarke coming back and felt relieved for about half a second, before he saw the two smirking young adults walking through the door behind her.
“Jasper… Octavia… What a pleasant surprise. I realize you came to visit in the middle of the evening. Unannounced. But if you just excuse me,” then without giving them a chance to answer, he walked past the three baffled people and threw himself out the door into the yard. The cold October breeze helped him cool of, but he still was trying to calm down when he heard light footsteps behind him.
“Bell, what’s going on? You’re acting wei –”
“WILL YOU FUCKING MARRY ME ALREADY?” He turned around and could see Clarke was startled by his outburst, but he was too done to care.
“Now, I've tried asking you forty different ways and it's about damn time you come up with an answer. I'm asking you to marry me. I love you, Clarke Griffin. All I know is that I want to keep talking to you. Everyday until my last fucking breath. I want to know how your day was, what you ate. I want to argue with you, even if I know you will win every damn time. And it’s not because I’m lonely, but when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.” He let out a deep breath he hadn’t know he had been holding. He was about to loosen when Clarke started laughing. What?
“What the hell Clarke?” He opened his arms widely, hoping for an explanation. Her laughing her ass of before him was not the reaction he expected, and certainly not wished for.
“I’m sorry… I’m so sorry. I don’t mean to,” she said between her laughs and finally stopped. By now, he hoped for a hole to form in the ground beneath him so it’d swallow him up and the embarrassment would be over. “It’s just… Okay don’t get mad at me, well madder, but I kind of overheard you and Miller last week.”
Bellamy’s face dropped. Did she know all this time? “I was going to say something, to help you, but it was just so fun to watch you cringe.”
“Oh I apologize. I didn’t know my pain entertained you so much. I hope you’re pleased with the show and happy w–” Before he could continue, she pressed her lips to his. It was soft at first, but she deepened it and as Bellamy slid his tongue between her parted lips, he truly believed he would never get tired of kissing her. They stopped to breathe, and Clarke rested her forehead on his. “Yes, I’m very happy, Bellamy Blake. And yes, to answer your question, there’s nothing I’d like than being your wife. But you do realize your proposal involves swearing, right?
“Shut up, princess,” he said as he kissed her again in relief.