Chapter Text
"Oh god fucking damn it."
Emi glowered at Shikyou's unusual blushing expression, a pinkish red color almost covering the entirety of her face. Her eyes tried to focus on the doll, who thought of the Amanojaku herself as an unearthly being, but she only dragged out to coming in contact with the floor.
"Why do you always have to get drunk when you visit. Is this some kind of joke that you play just to make my life more of a Hell?" Emi uttered, and found that Shikyou wasn't listening to her for even a single second. She snapped her fingers in resentment. Finally picking herself off the floor, Shikyou recollected her appearance near her the time that she was wasting herself, and finally managed to get the choked down words out.
"H-hey bitch! Don't a-act like a s-s-smartass to a god like me! I'll tear your head off!" Shikyou replied with a stutter. Emi snatched the glass out of her hand and held it as far away as possible. "I'm already losing braincells to your bullshit. If you wanna decapitate me, then go ahead."
The Amanojaku scoffed at her ruthless response. "Give me back my b-beer. Without it I-I'm no longer a sexy banana!" Emi contemplated Shikyou's actions as she was crawling closer to reach the drink. She clinged onto her leg and hung onto it, begging for her to return her precious beverage.
"You really, REALLY have a big problem." Emi lectured the whining goddess as if she were a small child. Or more fittingly, a bratty teenager.
"So what if I d-do?" Shikyou raised her head and shakily swung it back in forth like a pendulum. Emi wasn't convinced by her supposed "hypnotizing", as a matter of fact, her attitude got worse.
"Why can't you be normal for once while on dates?! I'd love it if you could've showed up without a bottle of beer in your hands and already DRUNK!" The violet haired woman scolded harshly, pressing her index finger into Shikyou's face to get her point across. But as usually expected of the other girl, she rather wouldn't listen.
"Oh, I don't know, maybe this is normal for me?" Shikyou giggled with a smug grin, and unable to control her laughter or her sudden movements, she wrapped her arms around Emi and brought herself close to her face to kiss.
"Why you little!-" Emi's hand formed a claw and was aiming to scratch the Amanojaku's eyeballs out. However, in an instant, Shikyou flew out of her arms and spun around to show off her so-called "impressive deity powers." The doll clutched her fists and groaned, her wrath already reaching the limits.
"God! No matter how hard I try, you always ruin everything! What the hell is fucking wrong with you!?" Emi barked and banged her clenched hands on the wooden table. She threw herself out of her seat and promptly sprinted out the door, her getas loudly resounding in the silent room as it was striking the hard floor. Shikyou perceived her own actions and what it did to affect her dear lover. She sighed melancholy and flumped back down in her seat, staring at the half empty glass of alcohol that reflected her saddened state.
"That really sucks to have that happen to someone you care about, huh?" An abrupt voice exclaimed from afar. Shikyou, startled by the unforeseen occurrence, rose to her feet and turned her head in the direction toward the owner of the voice.
"Long time no see, Shikyou Amanojaku." Akari grinned and brushed her scarlet red dyed pigtails.
"The mistress from the Oborodzuka clan..." Shikyou paused and blatantly scowled at the visitor. "More like... the mistake that was born into the Oborodzuka clan."
"Don't bring my shitty relatives into this." Akari grumbled with unease, then approached the divine being and held her hand out to her vaguely. "Akari, I'd love to hold your hand, but I'm already in a meaningful relationship with a wonderful woman." Shikyou teased and shooed her open palm away from her sight. This was going to be a lot harder to do than I thought... Akari's mind pondered.
"You call what just happened 'meaningful?' Looks like you two have too many issues than there is to count." Akari declared, and also slightly holding in her laughter, since the situations the couple had gotten into in the past were truly unrealistic and idiotic. Shikyou shook her head and glared at the wall to stop focusing her attention on her life problems being brought up and forced in her face to be solved.
"So... you're here because you want to help me fix my relationship with Emi, correct?" Shikyou questioned, raising an eyebrow in response to hearing her previous claims.
"Yeah, guess so. Hopefully that departure Emi made earlier wasn't her last straw. Because with all my advice and knowledge I'm going to have to train you to be a better girlfriend." Akari proposed her goal, with her little lesbian in training already half asleep at this point. "What? I only heard the 'yeah' part." When Shikyou and Akari had first engaged in a conversation the few minutes earlier, she sounded entirely sober. Despite how far she had gotten to keep clinging to reality, she sluggishly fell back to square one.
"Listen Shikyou, you're a sad, sad person. Executing innocent people, setting fire to inhabitant's houses, not sharing your Jeresy Mike's sandwich... you get the idea." Akari complained about the goddess's insulting behavior, during which Shikyou was still struggling to get off of the floor and stand up properly. "But! I know you at least have some charm to be a humorous, caring, and sweet partner to your girl, and not being afraid of commitment!" The Kitsune lady encouraged and jumped in her place with excitement to start already.
"That last sentence is the absolute opposite of me, especially the 'humorous' part, but I'll take it." Shikyou rejoiced with an untruthful smirk, but one that made Akari still see the passion in that crumbling, broken soul of hers. "Alright! Now are you ready to be the best and gayest girl in the whole castle town?" Akari shouted eagerly, prying her off the ground and bringing her back to her feet.
"H-Hell f-fu-ucking y-yeah~!!" Shikyou's words slurred together and she almost collapsed onto the other woman on accident. Yet, Akari smiled brightly. She would teach her everything she knew, making Shikyou something like... her little student. She wasn't the most enjoyable or morally right person in the whole world... but Akari knew that there was something about her that could show a bit of improvement. Or a lot. Most likely a lot.
"That's the spirit Shikyou." Akari chimed softly in a whisper, skipping out of the exit while carrying her dear student over her shoulder.