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“Jesus, Zoro, do you have any other topic besides Sanji?”
Zoro blinks at Nami in bewilderment who's pinching the bridge of her nose. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap like that. It’s just – I’m really freaking tired right now and have a banging headache and I don’t know, I just –,” she pauses and looks at Zoro, “I really don’t feel like talking about Sanji again.” Zoro frowns, clearly confused. “What do you mean, again?”
“I mean,” Nami emphasises, “that you talk about Sanji doing this wrong, saying that wrong, acting annoying or just how stupid he looks a lot.”
Zoro puffs his cheeks and thinks for a moment before slowly replying, “Well, don’t blame me. It’s that Bastard’s fault for being so goddamn irritating.”
Nami sighs. “No it’s really not, Zoro. You’re the only one who thinks that and to be honest, even if he was, why don’t you, I don’t know, just ignore him or something?” Zoro tilts his head, stunned. He didn’t even think of that. That would be a lot easier.
“Anyway, I’m gonna go and try to get some rest, alright? Can you tell the others to mind the ship for a while?” Zoro merely grunts in response and leans back comfortably, grinning. Perfect. Problem solved. If he doesn’t think about the Shitty Cook, he won’t be bothered by the Shitty Cook and he certainly won’t talk about him ever again. Zoro shudders just thinking about it, how come he never realised just how much he actually complains about him?
He wonders what Sanji would think of him outsmarting him like that, would he be annoyed at being ignored? – Wait, scratch that. It doesn’t matter what he thinks about it because Zoro does not care about neither Sanji nor his stupid opinions. Just then, Zoro spots Sanji stepping out onto the galley, untying his apron, face turned towards the sun.
Great.
How is he supposed not to think about the Shitty Cook when said Cook is obnoxiously obstructing his field of view? Does ignoring Sanji include not looking at him at all? Zoro frowns and tries looking in the opposite direction and ah yes, that’s much better. Out of sight, out of mind. As long as he can’t actually see him, he’ll have absolutely no problem not thinking about the other and his ridiculous looking spirally eyebrows, his pathetic excuse of a beard, his disgusting smoking habit or – “Oi, Zoro! Catch!”
Zoro whips his head around in surprise just in time to catch the peculiar object being flung at him. “Usopp made it!” Luffy shouts from on top the Sunny’s figurehead. “It’s some kind of… thing… actually, I don’t really know what it is. But I need both hands right now, so…” he trails off and laughs. Zoro rolls his eyes at his Captain’s antics but smiles as he puts the strange object down next to him.
A few seconds pass by until Zoro realises what exactly he is looking at. Somehow, without even noticing, he finds his gaze on the stupid Cook again. He grits his teeth and scowls. This is proving itself to be frustratingly difficult.
He’ll just have to close his eyes completely, then he definitely can’t look at the other accidentally. Zoro breathes a sigh of relief, content with his solution, closes his eyes and and leans back, enjoying the peace and quiet inside his mind. Not a trace of he-who-he-won’t-think-about anywhere, completely calm. He feels a gentle breeze tickling his face and ruffling his hair, he smells the salty air of the sea and he can hear Franky yelling something in his workshop. The mid-day sun shines on his face mercilessly, blazing hot and burning bright and yellow dots start floating on the inside of his eyelids, dancing and growing, looking suspiciously a lot like the hair of certain Cook, taunting him and – Goddamnit! Zoro groans internally and opens his eyes. Why is this so fucking hard?!
Zoro tries squinting next. When he looks around, all he sees are blurry spots and he can barely make out what they are. Perfect. Zoro concentrates very hard and thinks of everything but food, legs, the colour yellow, cigarettes, suits and wow, he actually can shut these thoughts out completely! He doesn’t even care about how ridiculous it must – “Lunch’s ready! Usopp, Franky, come on up!” Immediately, all the thoughts come rushing back in and Zoro actually groans out loud.
Why did that Shitty Cook have to call out right now? What did he ever do to deserve this?
And why can’t he fucking stop thinking about Sanji?
Zoro decides to really look at Sanji then, consciously and willingly, for the first time and he lets his mind wander freely, studying him intently. Zoro notices the way Sanji blinks whenever he exhales, how his lips are always slightly parted, the way he keeps shifting his weight from one foot to the other and maybe his eyebrows aren’t really that stupid and maybe the stupid one was actually him because holy shit, Zoro thinks, he actually might love Sanji. Like, really love him.
Suddenly Sanji catches Zoro staring at him and glares at Zoro. “What you looking at, Marimo?”
“Just thinking about how your presence ruins my nap,” he snaps back and scowls. This sure as hell doesn't make it any easier, though.
I think I’m in love with you and I don’t know what to do.
—
“Oi, Usopp. Where’d Marimo go?” Sanji is sure Zoro had just been here a few minutes ago.
“Oh, Zoro? He just left, wanted to get some stuff from the market,” Usopp answers and pauses. “Why? You miss him already?” he adds with a smirk. Sanji frowns and ignores the question. “He went alone?” The thought of Zoro and his horrible sense of direction wandering through the city on his own makes him feel kind of uncomfortable.
“Yeah. He said it’d be a hassle for more people to go and that it won’t take long anyways,” Usopp explains. “Why? You worried?” he tries again, still smirking. Sanji gives the sniper his most menacing glare and Usopp actually has the audacity to laugh right in his face.
A few hours later, the blond Cook, standing at the railing of the Sunny, takes a drag of his cigarette and lets the smoke fill up his lungs, contemplating. He looks at the time and furrows his brows. Perhaps, that Oaf’s sense of time is as dreadful as his sense of direction. Or maybe, he really did get lost again. Or even injured. Who knows what dangers could be waiting in the city? What kind of city was it anyway and did they even do a background check first? Honestly, does anybody even know where Zoro was headed to? What it actually was that he needed?
“Usopp! Did he say where he was going?” Sanji asks and tries not to let his thoughts show on his face. Usopp thinks for a moment before shrugging, “Nah, don’t think so. Something to do with his training, I think.” Sanji huffs, of course that Dumbass is going to buy something for his training, it’s not like he has much else going for him. Sanji gives it another hour because by then, he will surely have returned.
Another hour passes and still no sign of Zoro. That stupid, brainless Idiot, he can’t just up and leave like that without telling anybody anything, making the whole crew worry! He seriously needs to have a talk with that Mosshead about common decency, when he gets back. Sanji turns around, prepared to reassure the others, only to find them all minding their own business. Usopp and Franky are casually working away at the back of the ship, Chopper is sitting next to Robin, going through some books from what it looks like, and Luffy is nowhere to be seen, though Sanji can hear him argue with Brook downstairs. Sanji frowns and spots Nami who just walked past him.
“Nami-San~,” he calls out, “I was just wondering… Marimo’s been gone for hours now. Alone.” Nami looks at him with a confused expression and Sanji clears his throat. “I mean… I was just – to be honest –“, he pauses, "why doesn’t anybody give a shit?!”
“Eh?”, Nami asks, bewilderment lacing her voice, “Are you feeling alright, Sanji-Kun? It hasn’t even been very long yet, it's not unusual, especially for Zoro.” She laughs, clearly not worried at all. “And even if it had, you know Zoro’s gonna be fine! You do know that… right?”
She eyes him apprehensively and it slowly dawns on Sanji that he might indeed have overreacted, a blush creeping up his cheeks. Hell, they are pirates, Zoro is a grown man, this is just some random city, it’s not like they’re being attacked by Marines or anything and there is absolutely no reason at all for him to behave like that. And even if there was, he shouldn’t care that much. Worrying is fine, to some extent, but not about a dumbass like him. He’s acting like it’s Nami-San that’s gone missing, for God’s sake!
Suddenly a shiver runs down Sanji's spine and his mind goes blank. Could it actually be that…? No. No way. Abso-fucking-lutely not.
That’s… Zoro and he’s Sanji. He loves women, he adores them, he always has, that’s who he is! There is no way in hell that he’d ever think about a man like that, much less the least elegant and charming man he’s ever known, he could never love a rude, brainless and insensitive man like Zoro.
Sanji is trembling, rooted to the spot and his throat feels tight. He wants to swallow but he’s struggling to breathe. He feels like fainting and grabs onto Nami for support. “Sanji-Kun! What’s wrong, what happened?”, she exclaims worriedly, keeping him on his feet. “Nami-San, I – I think I am –“
I think I’m in love with you and that scares me half to death.