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“Ah Seungwannie! You are so cute!” Joohyun pulled the other girl over by the hand so she was in frame for the selca.
“Oh, really?” Seungwan patted her face gently, peering at the screen again. “But my face is all swollen!”
“Pretty!” Joohyun snapped another picture before dragging Seungwan down onto the couch with her, the drunk girls falling into each other clumsily.
The other members were asleep; Joohyun and Seungwan had gone out for an “unnie date,” visiting a wine tasting bar since neither of them had individual schedules for the next day. Seulgi and Yeri both had photoshoots while Joy had a variety show to MC. All of them whined as Joohyun and Seungwan promised a future trip with all five members.
Joohyun looked down at Seungwan. She had fallen unto her unnie’s shoulder and apparently had decided to stay there despite the discomfort. Joohyun watched as Seungwan’s eyelashes fluttered gently over sleepy eyes, her pale cheeks made pleasantly rose pink from the wine.
“So pretty. The prettiest one.” She used one hand to tuck a stray lock behind Seungwan’s ear, finding Seungwan’s hand with the other.
At this, Seungwan’s eyes shot open wide. “No, the prettiest one is you!” She sat up forcefully, wobbling a bit as she turned to face Joohyun. “You are the prettiest in the whole world! The whoooooole wooooorld! It’s a fact!”
“No.” She patted Seungwan’s face. “You look so pretty when you smile. With your whole face, like you want everyone to feel happy too.”
“No, I look like a clown. A big round-headed clown.” Seungwan pulled up the camera on her own phone, pouting at the screen. “You can’t even see my eyes when I smile.”
“No!” Joohyun didn’t consider herself very good at words, even with her members. She didn’t know how she could break through Wendy’s belief that she wasn’t as pretty as the rest of the members. So instead, she plucked the phone from Seungwan’s fist easily— Seungwan had been too busy whining to notice the gleam in her unnie’s eyes— and sat on it.
“Unnieeee, my phone!” Seungwan leaned her weight into Joohyun’s shoulder, but Joohyun leveraged her feet against the floor and pushed back.
“Not until you admit you’re cute!”
“I’m cute...”
“That doesn’t count!” Joohyun said, wagging a finger at Wendy’s mischievous grin. “You have to mean it!”
“Unnie!”
“It’s like the game ‘It’s because I’m pretty’! You have to tell me how cute, adorable, and absolutely beautiful you are and then you can have your phone!”
Seungwan pouted. “Somehow I feel like you’re making fun of me.”
“I mean it!” But Wendy wasn’t looking at her anymore, but instead was staring at her feet tracing shy circles on the ground.
“I’m.... cute...”
“Look at me and say it.”
Wendy’s eyes met hers with a grimace. ”I’m cute?”
“No look at me and say confidently, ‘I’m beautiful’.”
“Unnie!” Seungwan sighed, collapsing her upper body in on itself. “Stop playing with me!”
“I’m not! I just think you should know how pretty you really are!” She reached out and pet the top of Seungwan’s head, smiling as the younger girl sat up. The smile soon disappeared when she saw tears in the corners of Seungwan’s eyes. “It’s true it’s true it’s true!” she said quickly, slinging her arms too fast around Seungwan’s shoulders. “I just want to hear you say it.”
“But my face always swells and my weight goes up and down, and I’m...” She sighed. “The four of you all shine like the sun and sometimes I... I feel like the moon just reflecting that.”
Joohyun tried, but she was too drunk to have that level of self restraint. She laughed manically. “Wendy Son Seungwan that was far too cheesy!” She fell backwards, unwittingly dragging Seungwan with her. They fell sprawled, Wendy resting on Joohyun’s chest. Joohyun could feel the other girl’s warm breath through the fabric of her blouse. Their breaths were slow and in sync.
“There’s a saying I heard once,” she started, placing her hand on top of Seungwan’s head again and carding her fingers through her hair. “‘A way a person thinks can be beautiful’.”
“Like an artist... Like Seulgi?”
“Hmmm... I suppose that’s true. Our Seulgi-ah has a very unique way of thinking.”
“Seulgi is beautiful,” Seungwan whined. Joohyun ignored her.
“But when I think of that quote, I think of you, Wannie.”
“Me?” She moved to get up, but Joohyun kept her hand firmly on Seungwan’s head, forcing her to stay put.
“Yes, you. You are always so thoughtful and kind and generous... Even people who don’t know you well can see that beauty.”
Joohyun ran out of steam. If Sooyoung was here, she’d probably fare better, but instead it was her continuing to comb through Wendy’s hair with her fingers waiting for the other girl to finish musing over what she’d just said.
“... do you really think so?”
“I do.”
“I— uh— thank.... you?” In true Wendy fashion, she didn’t understand how to respond to a compliment. But that innate humbleness was part of what made Wendy Wendy, and Joohyun had grown accustomed to mumbled or stuttered gratitude.
That sat there for a moment more, Seungwan’s breaths evening out. Joohyun could feel herself drifting off as well. She jumped when Wendy spoke again.
“Unnie can I have my phone?”
“Fine.” She dug it out and handed it over. “But promise me you won’t forget what I said.”
“I would never forget something you’ve said to me.”
“Yah, Wannie! Too cheesy!”
“I wasn’t even trying, though!”
Seungwan carefully lifted herself up, and Joohyun instantly missed the warmth of the other girl next to her.
“Are you going to bed?”
“Yeah.”
“Don’t wake Seulgi up—“
“Of course I won’t—“
“Come stay with me.” As the words left her mouth, she could feel her soberness. If she was still drunk on anything, it was Wendy’s presence.
“Um, okay unnie.”
“Seulgi-ah needs to do well tomorrow.”
“Hey, I already said yes!” She batted at Joohyun’s outstretched arm before offering the requested help to get Joohyun on her feet.
Joohyun wrapped an arm around Wendy’s and towed her into her single room. She tossed a pair of pjs at Wendy to change into before they both removed their makeup and brushed their teeth in the tiny attached bathroom. Their elbows inevitably banged into each other but neither left to wait in the bedroom for the other to be done.
It was a single room, and so there was only the single full sized bed instead of two. But Seungwan slid in after Joohyun raised the covers without comment. They were facing each other, eyes drooping from the late hour. Already, she could feel the extra body heat and she melted into the feeling. In the morning, perhaps this was a bad idea but for right now, she felt it was one of her best.
“I think I’m going to fall off the edge, unnie.”
“Then scoot closer.”
“Isn’t that too close?”
“I’ll turn around in a second.”
Seungwan listened, scooting in close enough that their breaths mingled. If she leaned in, their noses would touch.
“Good night, Wannie.”
“Good night, Hyun-ah.”
Hyun-ah... It wasn’t a nickname she’d heard from Wendy before, but she instantly decided she loved it. She looked at Seungwan with a smile before placing a kiss right at the corner of her mouth where her cheek met the pillow. Was it a lazy cheek kiss, too tired to raise her head? Was it a shy lip kiss? Only Joohyun could know, and that was the ambiguity she had to live with even as she had the most beautiful girl lying in her bed an inch away.
Seungwan’s eyes were wide, showing the whites all the way around. The same expression as when she found a food surprisingly tasty, or a shockingly interesting fact, or something cute. She decided not to read into it too much— couldn’t read into it for her sanity’s sake— but flipped herself over onto her side to sleep. She felt an arm drape over her hip gently, then the warmth of Seungwan pressing into her back, Seungwan’s hand moving to hug her close. Joohyun couldn’t imagine a better night, almost didn’t want to sleep. But she soon drifted off, lulled by the warmth.