Chapter Text
Kenny McCormick never woke up to an alarm on sunny days.
Sure, he was aware that most other people would find waking up from the harsh sun in their face rather annoying, but to him it felt different. It was simply something that left him in a good mood.
Maybe it was because the harsh rays held a promise of a rare sunny day in the normally so gray, cold and wast town of South Park, or maybe it was a reminder that even though something felt harsh and sudden at first, it could turn into something beautiful and warm if you gave it time.
Or maybe he just hated the sound of his alarm and therefore preferred basically anything to it, and he had just been spending so much time alone with Stan that he was turning into a deep and poetic mess like his friend.
It was probably the last one.
The lanky teen sat up slowly, yawned so hard his jaw cracked, and looked out the window, which was always a possibility considering his family couldn't (or wouldn't) afford such luxuries as curtains for the middle kid's bedroom.
Kenny sighed and shook his head, trying to wake himself up some more, making his mop of sandy blonde hair even messier than it already was, and nearly had an heart attack when the alarm on his phone, which he had forgot to turn off, suddenly set off.
Okay, he shouldn't be joking about the heart attack thing, because he really didn't feel like dying today, no matter how tired he was.
He finally rose out of bed, grabbed his trusted, old and ratty orange hoodie, gave it a quick whiff to make sure it was still good to go, and pulled it over his head, keeping the hood up to save time on not trying to fix his mess of blonde, borderline curly mess of hair.
He let his eyes sweep over the floor, trying to locate a wearable pair of jeans, but didn't see any.
He groaned and rubbed his face, but then he caught sight of a small stack of three neatly folded, and freshly washed, jeans on the floor near his door.
Karen.
He breathed a sigh of relief and reminded himself to do something to thank her in the close future.
That kid was worth her weight in gold, he swore on it.
Finally dressed, Kenny dragged his still sleepy body to the bathroom, relived to see there was no line of siblings and/or parents waiting outside the door.
He took a quick look in the mirror and childishly stuck his tongue out at his reflection, then grinned a bit to himself, showing off the pretty big gap between his front teeth.
He knew his mother felt bad for that, having spent the money set aside for his braces on drugs back in the day, but honestly, Kenny didn't mind that too much. It was just teeth, and as long as they served their purpose, he was happy enough.
He proceeded to brush said teeth, then making sure no drool from his sleep was still stuck on his freckly face.
He was a super heavy sleeper who had a bad habit on drooling on both himself and his pillowcase, and while his appearance wasn't something he bothered that much with, he drew the line at walking around with drool on his face.
When he deemed his face acceptable to meet the public, he left the bathroom to shuffle into the kitchen, being greeted by the smell of slightly burned waffles and the deep voice of his older brother, Kevin.
No parents in sight, and Kenny knew that probably meant their mother was asleep in her room, and he hoped it meant their dad was at an early shift at the garage he had started working at a while back.
He knew better than to ask, though, as he wanted the morning conversation to be as pleasant as possible.
“Mornin' Ken. Sleep well?”
Kenny tried to swallow another yawn, but failed, so he just nodded in stead.
Kevin huffed out a laugh and shook his head, while he grabbed a waffle out of the toaster and put it on a plate in front of Kenny, this one not burned at all, in comparison to the one Kevin himself was eating.
“You know I don't mind the crispier ones, right?” Kenny asked, looking up at his older brother with raised eyebrows.
“Crispy? Is that we call it know?”
Both boys turned their heads as their younger sister, Karen, quickly darted into the kitchen and grabbed another waffle for herself.
Kenny took in his siblings appearance for a second, and felt a familiar pang of affection for both of them.
The two of them actually looked pretty similar, despite the age difference, with Kevin being 20, and Karen turning 14 this year.
They shared the same thick, straight, brown hair, Kevin's swopped messily to the side, and Karen's usually hanging straight down, curtaining around her face, they also had the same grey-blue eyes and slightly round faces.
Basically, Kenny looked nothing alike them. Just another reminder that he was different from them, he supposed.
The same, but different.
“Ken? Hellooo, Earth to Kenny?”
Kenny blinked and gave his head a quick shake as Karen's voice knocked him back to reality.
“Yes, Karen, That's what we call them now,” he retorted and raised his eyebrows at her, before he added:
“Because we're very thankful of Kevins amazing cooking skills, remember?”
Kevin rolled his eyes and Karen grinned, before taking a bite of her waffle.
“Well, see you later, have a nice day guys.” Karen was already out of the kitchen door when Kenny yelled after her.
“Hey, where are you going so early?”
Karen stuck her head back in through the doorframe and her hair swayed slightly.
“I'm meeting Trisha and Ike, we're gonna go through some homework before school,” she answered with a shrug and Kenny rolled his eyes.
“And by that I guess you mean Ike letting you guys copy his homework, because he actually did them?”
Karen grinned innocently and shrugged, before waving and darting out the door with a quick “bye!” over her shoulder.
Kenny shook his head again, but Kevin gave him a knowing look.
“Speaking from experience I guess?” he asked slyly, and brushed his hands off over the sink.
“What?” Kenny asked, not following.
Kevin grinned.
“Coping homework from Broflovskis are kind of a tradition now, isn't it?”
Kenny grinned and shrugged.
“Well, Karen actually has a head on her shoulders, she just need to use it.”
He got up himself, put his plate in the sink and grabbed his old ratty shoulder-bag.
“Me, on the other hand?” Kenny shrugged.
“There was never any hope.”
Kevins face suddenly got a serious as he looked at his younger brother.
“You know that's not true, right?” he asked, with a rare serious expression.
Kenny shrugged.
“Does it even matter? We both know we only have hope of sending one person from this family to college, and we both know it should be Karen,” he said and tried his best to smile like he didn't care about it at all.
“Well, gotta get moving if I don't wanna be late,” he mumbled when Kevin didn't stop looking at him with that serious expression on his face.
“Yeah, have a nice day...”
Kevin's voice still sounded strange, but Kenny didn't let himself think about it too much.
He knew his was right about the college discussion, and that was that.
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Kenny hated Thursdays.
At least, Kenny hated Thursdays in school.
He was aware that Junior year was supposed to be though, but honestly, a day with double classes of geometry right before lunch was borderlining on human torture.
It didn't help that the only two friends he had in this class was Token Black, who had an ridiculously easy time with all types of math, and Butters Stotch, who didn't seem to understand anything more than Kenny, was all but unbothered by this, and continued doodling away his answers with his pastel gel pens and smiling and thanking the teacher every time she told him he did something wrong.
When the bell finally rang after what felt like at least three eternities, Kenny shoved his books and paper sheets right into his bag without even trying to keep it somewhat organized, and hurried towards the door without looking back, trusting that at least Butters was following him, as usual.
As he came to a halt by his locker, he looked over his shoulder to see that he was right, because Butters was standing behind him, looking at his phone with a far off expression on his face.
Kenny brutally stuffed as many books as possible into his locker, before he quickly slammed it shut before anything had a chance to fall out.
He gently grabbed Butters arm and started steering him towards the cafeteria to find the rest of their friends.
“What'cha watching, Butters?” Kenny asked his shorter friend, slightly fascinated by the way he managed to keep his eyes on the tiny screen at the same time as he didn't bump into anyone or anything.
Butters tapped his screen to pause whatever it was he was watching, and locked his phone and put it in his pocket, before he smiled up at Kenny.
“Oh, sorry Ken, I didn't mean to ignore you, I'm just really into this new game I found...” he explained with an apologetic smile and a shrug.
Kenny quickly reassured his friend that he hadn't felt ignored, but didn't add on that Butters being engrossed with some show, youtube video or a game on his phone was pretty standard at this point.
He knew too well that the boy felt guilty way too easily, and he really didn't have a problem with Butters' slight phone addiction.
Kenny has an annoying habit of spacing out himself, without that reflecting anything on the people around him, so he kind of understood Butters.
Kenny let out a sigh as the boys entered the big, noisy cafeteria, trying to spot their other friends, who all had classes closer to the cafeteria and therefore usually was there before himself and Butters.
Butters found them first, lightly nudging Kenny and waving at their small group of friends as they started to make their way over to the table.
The only person to wave back was Stan, mostly because he was the only one who sat facing them, and Kenny rolled his eyes slightly as he saw that Cartman and Kyle, who both sat with their back to them, were clearly in some sort of heated discussion, based on the way Cartman was waving his hands and the way Kyle shaking his head angrily.
Great.
“Hey Fellas!” Butters said loudly and happily, blissfully ignoring Kyle and Cartman's obvious glares at each other.
People who didn't know him might think that Butters was simply gullible, and even kind of stupid, but Kenny knew him well enough to know that the constant positive attitude and kindness was a choice, and that he could stand his ground when needed.
Kenny really respected that about him.
Stan smiled genuinely up at Butters and greeted them, and Kenny felt a wave of appreciation for his friend, and sat down next to the dark haired boy and simply looked over at Cartman and Kyle, then back at Stan, and raised his eyebrows in question.
“Dude, I don't even know,” Stan said and rolled his eyes, and Kenny did the same, before he dug around in his bag, trying to locate his lunch.
When he finally succeeded in locating his lunch and sat back up, Butters and Stan was chatting about some recent drama happening with a couple in their year, but Kenny had long ago decided to stay out of any type of relationship related drama, so he just kind of tuned out.
The conversations and bickering happening around him made Kenny think about his own lack of involvement in the life of most of his peers, which was pretty much a choice he made back in Freshman year.
He had his close friends, which basically included the people he currently sat with, and he felt like he got a long well with Tweek, Craig, Token, Clyde and Jimmy, as well as Wendy and Bebe, but besides that, he rarely socialized with the other students and people his age unless he had to for school or something like that.
He liked other people, he really did, but his life was chaotic and uncertain enough as it was, with his parents being in and out of jobs and still both struggling heavily trying to beat addiction, him wanting to see his sister get into college, trying to do well at his job over at Tweak Bro's, making sure his friends didn't kill each other, never mind that he didn't have any idea what his own future held, on top of that he tried not to die every other day, and he didn't really see any way to fit any type of relationship or the likes into that mix.
If that were to ever happen realistically, it had to be with someone he already knew and trusted, he guessed, or someone he could learn to trust easily, which wasn't really an easy thing for him to do.
No, finding someone he could have fun with, trust with all the darker and more serious part of his life, and you know, actually have him... ehrm, or her, you know, who ever, love him back?
It all sounded too far fetched for him to even consider at this point.
Kenny was suddenly brought back out of his train of thoughts by a gentle nudging on his shoulder, and he blinked rapidly and turned his head to stare right into stormy blue eyes smiling warmly, if not a tad worriedly, at him.
“Uhm, sorry, what?” Kenny heard himself stammer out, taken aback by the way Stan tilted his head slightly and smiled a little softer at him.
“I said, are you finished?” Stan asked carefully, looking between Kenny and his now empty lunch bag.
“Class is starting in five, and we have history together now.”
Kenny hurriedly cleared his throat and nodded, going back to his default lopsided grin.
“Yeah, I know dude!” he said as he got up and slung his bag over his shoulder and pulled his hood back up over his hair.
“I was just... you know. Thinking. About school and stuff.”
Stan didn't really look like he believed that, but he shrugged a little as they started walking towards class.
“I guess,” he sighed, and grinned childishly.
“I generally try not to think much about school, but you do you, Ken.”
Kenny rolled his eyes and laughed, before they fell into a comfortable silence, shuffling off to class together.
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“Get off my chair Kahl, I'm fucking telling you!”
“No deal, fatso, I got here first, you can sit your fat ass over at the couch for once!”
“This is MY BASEMENT Kahl, and MY CHAIR!”
Kyle opened his mouth to yell something back, but Stan sent him a knowing look.
“Dude, just let him have the fucking chair,” Stan started, before raising his hands defensively as Kyle was about to argue.
“No, seriously,” Stan continued, looking uncharacteristically strict and serious. “You know he's not gonna give up, and I really just want to play some Smash Bro's and chill, please?”
Kyle clearly didn't agree, but after a few more seconds of glaring between Stan and Cartman he got up and moved over to the couch where Stan already was sitting, grumbling about how Cartman's fat ass would probably tip the couch over, anyways.
Off all the ways to spend his one afternoon off work, this was not what Kenny had imagined.
Based on how these nights usually went, it probably should have been exactly what he imagined, but he was coming to realize that he was an eternal, hopeless optimist when it came to his friends.
He should really know better, but what the hell.
One day maybe Cartman and Kyle would manage to spend an hour together without yelling at each other.
That day was certainly not today, and probably not in the foreseeable future, but there was always hoping.
Kyle and Cartman had each grabbed a controller without asking Stan or Kenny if they wanted to start, but Kenny figured that was probably for the best, them beating each other in Smash Bro's were a better option than them beating each other up in real life.
Kenny, who was currently seated on the floor in front of Stan's legs, leaned his head on Stan's denim clad knee and yawned, feeling the familiar drowsiness of lazy afternoons overtake him.
He found himself wishing it was just him and Stan there, because he had a feeling Stan might would have taken to playing with his hair or something like that if they were alone, but with both Kyle and Cartman there he knew that wasn't really a plausible option.
Stan always got so bothered and blushy (and cute) when Cartman made comments about him and Kenny being gay for each other, and therefore usually didn't engage in much physical contact when they were around.
Which was a shame.
Kenny heaved a sigh as he watched Cartman as Bowser basically slaughtering Kyle's Link, which just seemed to fire them both up more and more.
When Kyle demanded rematch, Kenny gave up on ever getting to play, at least for that night, and climbed up on the couch between Kyle and Stan, before he slung his lanky legs over Kyle's lap, and placed his head in Stan's lap.
Kyle, being used to Kenny taking this position, just calmly lifted his hans holding the controller so Kenny could make himself comfortable, not taking his eyes off the screen, where he was doing a slightly better job keeping Cartman in check.
Kenny figured there was probably some kind of metaphor in there somewhere, about Kyle and Cartman's natural talent for fighting each other no matter what was happening around them, but he really wasn't in a mood to figure it out.
Instead, he made himself comfortable in Stan's lap, sneaking small glances up at his friend's face through the strands of his bangs that were partly covering his face as he was laying down.
Stan's face had taken a slightly pink tone, as it always did when Kenny got a little physical with him, and his eyes were fixated at the screen, while he occasionally grinned or even laughed when one of their friends got their asses beat in the game.
Cute.
Kenny almost shook his head as a tic when the thought flew through his head.
He really needed to get those thoughts under control, or else he might say something out loud again, and had a feeling Cartman wasn't gonna let too many more of those slip ups fly by without making a big fuss about it, and Kenny was not even remotely ready to deal with the consequences of that.
Kenny sighed softly, and closed his eyes instead, tuning out the sound of his friends' bantering, feeling himself slowly slip out of consciousness, letting sleep overtake his mind.
Just for five minutes, he told himself as he fell asleep.
…
Kenny woke to the feeling of someone poking his cheek repeatedly, harder and harder each time.
“Ugh, dude, no...” he mumbled and tried to push the hand away without opening his eyes.
“Kinny, I'm not having you gaying it up in my fucking basement any longer, wake up!”
The familiar, annoying as hell, voice only made the blonde groan harder, as he tried to turn away and put his arm protectively over his face.
“Dude, stop being such a pain in the ass,” Stan said tiredly, and Kenny smiled to himself.
Such a sweetheart. Kind of.
Cartman huffed.
“Pain in the ass, huh? I bet you know all about that, huh Stan?”
Kenny opened one eye and peeked between Stans reddening face and Cartman's smug one.
Kyle wasn't anywhere to be seen, which meant he either left after fighting with Cartman, or was simply in the bathroom.
Great.
“Why do you assume Stan would bottom, Eric?” Kenny asked with a innocent grin.
“Think a lot about these things, do you?” he added and enjoyed the way Cartman's face went from smug and self assured, to red and spluttering.
“What does Fatass think about a lot?” Kyle, who just emerged from the bathroom, asked with raised eyebrows.
“Didn't think he could even do that,” he added.
“Think a lot about something, you know?”
Kenny laughed, and to his relief, Stan's face had gone from deep red, to a cute pink tint, and he was laughing too.
“Shut the fuck up Kahl, I'm smart and I think about stuff all the time and you fucking know it!”
Cartman's voice had gone up a pitch which meant he was getting angrier, and Kenny couldn't help to feel encouraged by this.
Cartman was the one who started, after all.
“So,” Kenny started, and all eyes where on him again, “you do think a lot about who tops and who bottoms then, is that what you're saying?”
Cartman went back to spluttering angrily for a while, before he furiously told them all that they could all go fuck themselves, and screw them, they were going home!
The three boys each got up and collected their things in a rather calm manner, as they were pretty used to being thrown out of their friends' house like this by now.
They calmly shuffled up the stairs, making sure to say their thanks and good-byes to Liane, who was watching TV in the living room, and then came to a halt when they were at the sidewalk outside Cartman's house.
Kyle blew on his hands and shivered a bit.
“Want me to borrow dad's car and drive you home, Ken?” he asked as he rubbed his hands together.
Kenny appreciated the gesture, but shook his head.
“Nah dude, it's okay, I don't mind walking.”
He made sure to smile reassuringly to both his friends as he said it and Kyle seemed pleased with that answer.
Stan, on the other hand, looked more uncertain.
“You sure?” He asked and raised his arm to scratch the back of his neck, which he always did when he was insecure or nervous.
“Yep!” Kenny said and flashed him a grin, before starting to back away slowly.
“Totally sure!” he said, as he raised his hand as a final wave and pulled his hood a little further down his face.
“See you tomorrow!” Kyle half-yelled over his shoulder, and Stan nodded slowly, still looking some-what nervous.
“Yeah, see you tomorrow Ken...” he said and gave him a small smile that made Kenny feel a flutter in his chest, and he gave Stan a final wave, before he turned around and started on the fifteen minute walk home.
He realized it was pretty cold, considering how his breath clouded around him, but as the years went by, he didn't really feel temperatures the same way anymore.
Probably another side-effect of dying and resurrecting all the time, it was bound to mess up some physical things after all these years, especially since no scars or marks ever stayed on his body when he came back.
Kenny sighed, and stuck his hands further down his pockets.
After a few minutes he walked past his place of employment and peeked inside, seeing the warm lights and low number of customers almost made him go inside to chat, but then he saw Craig sitting on one of the stools by the counter, talking to his blonde, twitchy boyfriend with uncharacteristically soft eyes and a small smile, and decided against it.
Tweek often told Kenny about how hard it was getting time alone with Craig between working and school and their parents, so he decided to let them be.
Kenny continued walking past Tweak Bro's and smiled to himself.
The place was technically a Harbucks now, but the Tweaks were still operating it, just with stricter rules for what to not put in their brews, and not working their son to actual death.
Kenny had applied for a part time job there just as Harbucks bought the place, heavily encouraged by Tweek, and had now worked there a little over a year, gaining both a little extra money for him and his family, and a closer friendship with Tweek himself, both of which he was very grateful for.
After a few more minutes of walking, Kenny could finally spot his family's house in the distance, the small, run down house seeming uncharacteristically warm and welcoming in the dark night.
Yes, he thought, his family was still far from perfect, but at least his parents had started trying to sober up, and their dad had even held down a job at a garage in town for almost a year now, which was easily a new record, and his siblings were both wonderful in their own ways.
Just as a feeling of familiarity and warmth was spreading through his chest, he heard the a strange, creaking sound above him, and he came to a halt.
He barley lifted his head to see the old telephone pole next to his house tilting, finally giving out from the rot that filled it, and falling towards him at a rapid speed.
He knew what was coming, and he felt a huge surge of annoyance, as he had really looked forward to going to bed tonight, getting a full nights sleep.
“Fucking shit.” he muttered, just as the old, tall and heavy pole fell right on top of his lanky body, crushing him like a bug.