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The day of your 16th birthday, the name of your soulmate will appear written in your wrist, never to disappear afterwards.
Yuzuru runs his fingers through his wrist, a frown on his face.
It's the morning of his 16th birthday, the day in which he will finally discover the name of his soulmate, and yet, there's no name.
There's a slight sense of relief when he sees that, actually.
No soulmate means no distractions, no one to take him away from his beloved young master's side. Still, even if he does feel relief, the thought at the back of his mind that he doesn't deserve a soulmate tries to take over him, sinking deeper until it reaches his heart.
This is no good, he shouldn't let his emotions take over him, it will get on the way of his duties.
After a sigh to relieve the weight in his heart, he walks towards the door of his room, once he opens it and crosses it, his day will really start. He will start his duties, his thoughts won't be able to disturb him.
Or so he thought.
But as the door opens, at the other side he finds his young master, looking even more surprised to see that the door has opened right as he was reaching to open it himself.
There's a small box wrapped with a ribbon and a colourful paper in his left hand, one that ha quickly hides behind his back as he gives a few small steps back, putting distance between the butler and himself.
"Bocchama?" He blinks surprised as he speaks, not expecting to find the pink haired boy there. He tends to try to enjoy every second of sleep he can before he's forced to wake up after all. For him to willingly wake up before Yuzuru gets in his room is incredibly unusual.
"Yu-Yuzuru!? You're already awake!?" Tori was fidgeting so much that he has ended up dropping the gift that he was trying to hide behind his back, Yuzuru's eyes immediately looking at the dropped object as Tori rushes to pick it up, trying to hide it once again even though by this point it's completely useless.
Yuzuru is too confused by what's happening to laugh at the situation.
"A-anyways! Today it's your birthday right?" The young master gets closer, showing the small box again and offering it to Yuzuru. "Hmph, in a day like today, it's only normal to reward you. You are getting a present handed to you by me personally! You should feel hou--" He was looking at Yuzuru sideways, but he stops talking and blinks, getting a bit closer to have a better look at Yuzuru's face and he even cups his cheek. "Eh!? Why are you crying now!?"
Yuzuru hadn't noticed that he had started crying at all until Tori points it out, bringing one of his hands to his face to whip the tears away.
"It's nothing, Bocchama." He affirms, a smile appearing on his face. "It's simply that I never thought I would have the pleasure of seeing Bocchama handing me a present personally. This action has moved Yuzuru's heart deeply, bringing me to tears."
"Geez, you sure cry easily..." Tori seems relieved to see that it's nothing serious though and once again offers him the present. "Happy birthday, Yuzuru." He says with the brightest smile on his face.
Yuzuru can't help but feel guilt.
Guilt at the fact he has just lied to his young master and he still gets to see that smile.
Despite how happy he feels at the fact that Tori is personally handing him a present, it can't overcome the feeling of sorrow of the realization that deep down, he wishes that the name "Himemiya Tori" would have appeared on his wrist.
A little over a year later, the one running his fingers through his own wrist is Tori.
There's no name yet, as there's still one day left for his birthday, but the nervousness keeps building up.
"Bocchama, you're doing that again." Yuzuru scolds him with a soft voice.
Tori then realizes that he was frowning, that he was holding his wrist instead of just touching it, and he quickly let's go.
"It's not like it really matters, does it?" He sighs, he understands if he gets scolded for doing something like that when they are at school, for showing weakness in public, worry over what name he will get, but when he's at home there shouldn't be anything to worry about. "All that stuff about soulmates is dumb anyways~ you should know better than I do." He complains afterwards, childishly as he lets his whole body fall on the couch.
"You're just upset that you already know that president-sama's name won't appear on your wrist."
Tori blushes at that, glaring at Yuzuru.
"It's not like that! He's not the one whose name I want to appear..."
"So there's someone." Yuzuru smirks while saying that, as if he had managed to get the result he wanted.
Tori notices this and blushes even more.
"It's not like it matters, does it!?" He complains as he crosses his arms and looks away from Yuzuru, closing his eyes even.
He hears Yuzuru chuckle as he continues cleaning the living room, and after assuming that the conversation won't continue, Tori opens his eyes again, looking at the blue bracelet that hides Yuzuru's wrist.
It's not something weird for people to hide their wrists. Most people don't want to let everyone see who's their soulmate, it's like showing a part of your own soul after all.
And it's even more normal to want to hide that you don't have a soulmate.
Tori hugs one of the cushions from the couch while staring at the bracelet, remembering the day of Yuzuru's 16th birthday.
He remembers being excited for him, wanting to know who was Yuzuru's soulmate, part of him scared that perhaps that person would try to take him away from him, but also thinking that if Yuzuru is loved, if his soulmate really loves him more than he does, if they promise they will make him happy, he won't have issues with letting go.
Tori realized not too long ago that those feelings were caused by his own love even back then, probably.
Not like it really matters though.
He remembers feeling a slight stabbing feeling in his heart when he saw Yuzuru had no name. That he didn't have a soulmate.
"That means that no matter what, Bocchama will always and forever be my priority." He had said with a smile on his face and for some reason that made Tori start crying.
That was probably caused by his desire of wanting to see his own name on Yuzuru's wrist, even if he hadn't realized it back then. And even if Yuzuru promises to stay always by his side, there's nothing he can do about the fact that in less than one day, a name will appear on his wrist, as if destiny itself was telling him that even if Yuzuru will never pay attention to someone else, he has to devote his heart and soul to someone else.
He believes that's too cruel, specially since he isn't getting a saying in this.
"Yuzuru." He calls, still hugging the cushion, nervous. The butler turns around to look at him, tilting his head and awaiting for his young master to continue talking.
But now that he's looking at Yuzuru's face he can't bring himself to say what he was thinking.
You don't have to stay forever by my side. You should get a hold of your own happiness as well. I'm sure your soulmate is waiting for you, somewhere.
He can't bring himself to say those words because he's too scared that Yuzuru will really leave his side if he does.
How dumb, even though he himself is aware that there's no way Yuzuru would leave so easily.
"I don't need a soulmate. I need you." He says instead, not realizing that the words have left his mouth.
Yuzuru is surprised by those words, his heart skipping a beat. He wonders if he has heard right or if he's simply delusional.
But looking at Tori's earnest expression, he can't deny that those words have been real.
Then it must be that he has misunderstood the meaning.
He smiles softly at him.
"Bocchama, it's normal to be afraid of change. But worry not, there's nothing to be afraid of. Whoever becomes your soulmate must be a wonderful person if they are destined to fall in love with you."
Tori's heart sinks hearing that, such sweet words accompanied by such a gentle smile, they were supposed to ease any trouble in his mind and heart, and yet he feels like he has been stabbed.
He has been rejected.
He tries his best to not start crying. He holds tighter to the cushion, pressing his face against it. How is he supposed to fall in love with his soulmate when he's already in love? He was sure that Yuzuru felt the same way, he wouldn't be surprised if he said that if it's for him, he would defy destiny itself, only so they could be together.
But apparently such a thing only happens in fairy tales.
A few hours until the clock hits midnight. Tori isn't sure at what time is the name supposed to appear, but he doesn't mind. It would be better for him if it never appeared.
Yuzuru can't help but remember his own 16th birthday as he walks towards Tori's room the next morning.
Each step he walks hurts him a bit more, the inevitable moment in which he will have to face reality will finally happen.
It felt like a pleasant dream. One that lasted long and yet felt too short.
To be able to serve his young master, to be able to be by his side, to be able to see him grow… He isn't ready to let go of all that, and even if he knows it won't be an immediate change, he knows that starting today nothing will be the same.
Yuzuru stands in front of the door trying to find the courage to open it, wondering what will the best reaction be for when he sees whichever name has appeared on Tori's wrist.
He wonders if it's someone they already know. If it's someone they have heard about, perhaps a kid from another rich family. If it's someone they don't know, he wonders if he will have to be the one finding a way to get in touch with them.
That would be way too painful, not only he has to put his own feelings aside, he will have to be the one handing his precious young master to someone else, making that meeting possible.
He tells himself that if it's for his young master's happiness, there isn't any big enough sacrifice.
The butler finally opens the door, walking directly to the window and opening the curtains to let the light inside.
Tori groans and tries to hide behind the blankets of his bed. As always, and even in a day like this, he still has a hard time waking up.
"Bocchama, happy birthday." Yuzuru says softly as he gets closer to his bed and continues speaking as he takes the blankets away. "However, even in a day like today, I won't have mer-" He stops speaking as soon as his eyes fall on Tori's wrist.
He was wondering what kind of name would appear, how he would react. He had gotten ready for as many situations as he could think, but none of them included this possibility.
He lets go of the blankets and holds Tori's wrist instead, reading the name properly and then… Rubs his thumb against Tori's wrist, as if he was trying to erase it.
If this is some kind of joke, it's truly one with very bad taste.
"Ouch, ouch, ouch!" Tori complains and finally wakes up, opening his eyes. "That hurts! Are you trying to snap my wrist!?" He continues complaining, quite angrily until he realizes what's happening.
There's a name.
He shakes his wrist away from Yuzuru's grip and looks at it. He reads it once, twice, thrice, and understands why Yuzuru was trying to make sure that it's real.
The name Fushimi Yuzuru is written there.
"Show me yours." Tori demands, still looking at his own wrist,as if he needs even more proof that this is real.
Yuzuru doesn't know what does Tori mean at first, but it quickly clicks on his mind and he takes away the blue bracelet from his wrist.
He stares at it for a short while, petrified.
He had never heard a case in which the name appeared so much time after the 16th birthday and yet, there it was.
Yuzuru shows Tori his wrist, the name Himemiya Tori written there, not being able to say a single word as he's sure that if he opens his mouth, he will start crying.
Ah, it really does feel like a dream, a dream he never wants to wake up from.
Thankfully, when Tori wraps his arms around him for a hug and he feels his tears falling down his cheeks, he knows that this is real. Not even in his dreams he can manage to feel such a pleasant warmth as he does when Tori hugs him.
"I lied, I'm sorry." Tori starts saying, and even without seeing his face, Yuzuru can practically
hear
his smile. "I did need a soulmate, but only if it was you."