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"you're definitely not backing out this time."
moon byulyi and her worn-out beige sweater were doomed.
"hyejin's been trying to convince you for how long? weeks? months?"
honey voice, black hair. wheein.
her name's jung wheein.
fuck.
it took thirty seconds for byulyi to process why jung wheein, who supposedly lives two hours from her apartment, was barging in with a spare key and shared the look of an angry six-year-old kid.
wheein scoffed, "don't look at me all lost and innocent, byulyi-unnie. i think you'd have an idea on how low the success rates are."
the whole setup sounded ridiculous. it's three in the morning, the kitchen clock ticking louder than usual, front door open wide, and byulyi's just there, with yesterday's clothes and tangled hair.
"are you serious...?"
wheein pulled up a single eyebrow in a manner that made byulyi shudder. she can feel last night's almost inedible dinner making its way up her system.
three am jung wheein was scary, horrifying even.
"is this negotiable?" byulyi opened her mouth in a lame attempt to save whatever's left of her sanity, "i mean i washed the dishes on your place for three months last time, can't this get a discount or something?"
shaking her head, wheein strutted over to grab byulyi's bag on the floor, "no, you're going fishing to that crappy place with hyejin approximately three hours from now."
"but hyejin can't even fish! i don't even get what's even on a fishing rod!"
wheein looked byulyi dead in her eyes and shoved the bag to her arms, "and that's exactly why she chose this, you hate fish."
"they're the living epitome of hell-raised slimy monsters! their eyes-"
wheein put her index finger over byulyi's mouth, "stop whining, unnie. you know you can't stop hyejin."
"is life even fair?"
"you made the bet yourself, unnie."
byulyi groaned and stood up, making her way to pack stuff that can protect her from the devil incarnation herself. while wheein's stare pierced through her back, curious eyes and all.
her stuff's in a mess, and wheein's new life mission didn't include helping byulyi search for wallets and keys buried under last night's lone drinking party. (but it included barging in at three am for odd reasons.)
jung wheein, black hair, red sweater, three am, fishing.
byulyi groaned again, louder this time.
---
scary fish. slimy fish. disgusting fish.
hyejin looked thankful enough byulyi could just chokeslam her right there and leave her body in the water.
"it's a small pond, why do you look like i dragged you to hell?" hyejin asked byulyi while tucking a strand of light brown hair back with her eyes dead set on the fishing pole.
the rundown pond was by far, the next set candidate for some hack and slash bloody thriller movie. the small canopy on top of them was barely holding on, and the water pretty much consisted of three to one ratio of mud and water-byulyi wondered if there were even any fish inside.
"the chances of me falling into the pond and being fish bait is very high. the chance you'll drag me into the water by yourself is higher."
"i'm not that mean."
hyejin's always unconvincing.
with that light brown hair that resembles buy-one-get-one bread from the bakery down the road, with seemingly full lips that's either munching on food or on wheein's, and that flimsy fishing rod. definitely.
and oh, hyejin's nails are intimidating.
very intimidating.
byulyi poked her fishing rod lazily and leaned back.
the store-bought veggie sandwich hyejin grabbed on the way quickly became distasteful, maybe it'll be useful fish bait later.
"do fish even eat these sandwiches?" hyejin grimaced when she heard byulyi rustling the convenience store's plastic bag behind them.
"dunno," byulyi picked the sandwich up and sniffed it, "is this past the expiration date? i'm afraid you won't use this and use me as bait later on. y'know, all that piranha and stuff."
hyejin didn't answer and turned to stare at byulyi blankly as if to say there's no fucking way a piranha can be there.
"if you keep worrying you'll fall, i'm afraid you'll jinx yourself unnie-"
"OH MY GOD HYEJIN THERE'S A GHOST-"
the next thing byulyi registered was the sound of water splashing loudly, annoyed screams, and two figures looming over the water surface.
and byulyi just so happened to be an expert in drowning.
ahn hyejin. sandwiches. long nails. fishing.
water.
---
when byulyi woke up, it's blurry.
wet, sticky.
she can't breathe properly.
is she coughing up water?
oh, hyejin's panicking beside her, with someone else.
"oh fuck, this idiot jinxed herself." it's hyejin's low voice.
"i'm so sorry! i didn't mean to scare her off or anything!"
a higher voice? a little raspy but clear. byulyi felt like she heard the skies talk.
oh, a bandana. yellow track jacket? long hair, black. darker than wheein's.
is she still coughing up water? byulyi can't feel her lungs. eyes still blurry. everything tastes like fish. scary fish. slimy fish. disgusting fish.
the two figures beside her seemed to talk frantically, panic rising in their voices. byulyi's quarter of consciousness can't help decipher whatever they're saying. all she felt is water, water, water, fish, and fish. she needs oxygen but hey something's not working properly in the system.
byulyi felt her body weakening, the sight changing from blurry to dark as time ticks.
and then there were lips on her own, oxygen pumping in into her lungs.
what?
everything seemed to stop tasting like fish. it's pink, felt pink. byulyi heard echoes of her heartbeat, marking every beat as the warning taste of salt crystals drying up on shores, high pitched laughter ringing across oceans, and sweet, sweet chocolate that reminded her of long-forgotten home.
her soul had an inkling on how warm the sun is.
last drops of water coughed up, byulyi regained her consciousness.
she blinked. once, twice.
it's hyejin, and an unknown girl.
her head feels heavy and everything darkens again.
drowning. long black hair. ahn hyejin. the ocean. sun.
---
ahn hyejin said it's a 'music major unnie i don't know the name of but goes to the same school as us'. jung wheein said 'really kind and pretty unnie who carried you back home but left as soon as i turned my back to check on you'.
none of them rang a bell.
but the yellow track jacket and bandana part were right. byulyi remembered being a pathetic fool, the warmth of the sun, and sea salt.
at least no more disgusting fish.
---
after the drowning incident, or 'byulyi unnie being an idiot part 32' as hyejin named, things went by as usual. byulyi passed midterms with "learning" half an hour before tests and so-so grades, wheein took up a small weekend part-time job to cover one of her sick friend's shift, hyejin moping around because wheein's not there to cuddle and kiss her from friday night to monday morning. everything's fine.
except maybe byulyi nearly had enough of her two best friends dancing around each other and not being official for years. but hey, it's wheein and hyejin. no labels, that's their style.
but the amount of time wheein secretly cried or threw a random tantrum when hyejin went out on yet another blind date, or the amount of midnight calls hyejin gives byulyi on days she fought with wheein might be over the limit.
they'll try someday, byulyi hoped.
there were lots of other matters byulyi could keep in her ever-revolving mind, but this had its own worth.
jung wheein. ahn hyejin. fools. stupidly in love.
maybe byulyi wanted some love too.
---
it turned out, a few weeks later, 'sporty and pretty with a bandana' unnie's name was kim yongsun. same yellow track jacket over her shoulder as she sat next to byulyi in a cramped diner, across hyejin and wheein telling a funny story animatedly in a way that makes kim yongsun laugh.
byulyi remembered oceans yet again.
it's bright, loud, and made something tingle inside her chest. funny how a mundane thing changed meaning over another human's way of interpreting it.
maybe it's the way the diner's neon lights reflected purple and blue shades over yongsun's face. (bubblegum pop playing over the speakers never sounded this nice.)
the next story wheein finished, byulyi found herself laughing along with yongsun. louder and freer than anything she had.
kim yongsun's laughter was infectious, it seemed.
"you should've seen wheein's face when byulyi unnie stuffed ten tanghulus in her mouth at once- it's really funny!"
"oh- oh- do you know this time when wheein stuffed ggomo into hyejin's bag secretly and the professor fumed cause he's allergic to cats?"
"hyejin once got into trouble for making people believe she actually had a pet lion, it's priceless really. our old dorm mother called the wildlife police, everyone was panicking!"
it's fun, with them like this. she didn't need to ask to know that hyejin and wheein found the missing link to their friendship circle. the older sister figure they always needed but never realized, it's warm.
kim yongsun is a warm person.
byulyi can tell a thousand more stories just to see yongsun's glistening white teeth and hear that laugh. her heart finally relaxed after all this time.
maybe, just maybe, the sun up in the sky was fake and the real one had been residing in kim yongsun for centuries.
moon byulyi found shelter on earth in the form of a 5"2 music major with black hair, wide smile, eyes containing the universe itself, and chin dimples.
hyejin's talking again, everyone's listening intently, and byulyi's eyes fell on yongsun's side profile.
kim yongsun. the sun. laughter. neon lights.
---
being a four-person group is nice, now byulyi had someone to cheer her on when playing air hockey. and someone to be with when wheein and hyejin started to forget their surroundings and made out.
they pretty much decided kim yongsun's more than nice and kept her into the circle of trust. movie nights are better now since yongsun apparently knew the stupidest movies known to man, and knew just what playlist to put on their impulse-based road trips.
byulyi's apartment was livelier with actual food inside her fridge, every single room tidied up, a worn-out squirtle mug next to byulyi's hamster mug, a new yellow toothbrush in the bathroom, and the occasional extra laundry. (byulyi safeguarded cereal boxes in hyejin and wheein's shared apartment since yongsun threw one to her head.)
byulyi didn't mind.
yongsun sleeping over since byulyi's apartment is nearer to campus was a good reason. the extra company was always welcome.
she finally looked happier when looking into the mirror every morning anyways.
"byul-ah, is tteokbokki a better choice than pizza for tonight?" yongsun asked from the couch, laptop draped over the coffee table with music scores showing.
the way yongsun's messy bed hair fell over her face is a sight.
"um? yeah." byulyi nodded vaguely, too distracted for a proper response.
"okay, good." yongsun picked her phone and starts typing, "should we get fish sticks from the usual place too?"
"for what?"
"for us, dummy."
"oh."
byulyi's heart was trying hard not to say the d-word.
but seeing yongsun, clad only in a blue sweater, with glasses hunched over her nose, was making her really wanna say it. the whole setup of ordering dinner for 'us' and later sleeping in one bed—since the couch is as hard as pavement—made it complex.
waking up next to kim yongsun with the said girl's black flocks invading byulyi's face, brushing their teeth together in the bathroom, watching yongsun make breakfast on sundays, ironing yongsun's favourite white shirt for the nth time every week. it's hard.
"byul? stop dozing off and help me with this part, i can't seem to find the right lyrics."
in the end, byulyi's heart gave in.
kim yongsun. couch. home. domestic.
the d-word didn't feel that weird anymore.
being a domestic couple with kim yongsun, the centre of the universe herself, didn't sound bad.
---
in a way, kim yongsun is simple yet complicated.
maybe it's the way yongsun kissed her under the blankets after saying good night every day.
(byulyi didn't say anything.)
maybe it's the way yongsun held her hand firm, fingers intertwined just the way byulyi likes it.
(hyejin noticed first, byulyi still didn't say anything.)
maybe it's the way yongsun pressed her against the bedroom wall, tongue and hands finding all the right place.
(wheein noticed later when byulyi wore scarfs in the middle of summer, still not saying anything.)
maybe it's the way yongsun looked at her and tells her everything will be okay when she cried in the middle of the night.
maybe it's the way yongsun embraced her ugly side, her labels.
maybe it's the way yongsun opens up about her past, telling byulyi about her exes honestly.
maybe it's the way yongsun fastened her walking pace to be on par with byulyi.
maybe it's the way the moonlight falls over yongsun's sleeping figure, ethereal underneath the blue light.
maybe it's the way yongsun forgot, the fact that moon byulyi took in falling for the sun faster than how she fell for kim yongsun.
---
in a certain way, kim yongsun had a nagging feeling on the back of her head that she's doomed. it twisted, pulled, tangled. her heartstrings unravelled like the seams of knitted yarn, ten-foot deep in moon byulyi's beige sweater.
the whole ordeal was a lot more ridiculous than what it showed on the surface. desperation led to more stuff circling way above yongsun's anticipation. and so, losing to yet another one if hyejin's stupid bets didn't work, being ggomo's sudden godmother and taking the cat to places didn't work, drowning in the crowd of a rock concert didn't work, talking to stupid, stupid moon byulyi's picture in the middle of the night didn't work.
"maybe you should actually try to talk it out, none of those 'effort' inside your head actually work, yongsun unnie."
wheein's right, the two youngest talked it out over impromptu after-sex talk and became the world's grossest and most adorable couple.
yongsun sighed and plopped down on wheein's spanking new and comfy couch, mumbling ineligible words.
"i can't hear you unnie."
"i hate waking up next to byulyi and realizing she's still not mine."
"ugh, gross."
yongsun glared at the short black-haired girl.
"you're sounding more and more like byulyi unnie."
yongsun groaned.
wheein exclaimed as if she proved a point, "see? you're even copying her sigh!"
---
meeting moon byulyi was a once in a lifetime chance kim yongsun didn't believe could happen.
the first meeting was bad, with byulyi drowning and all. (yongsun remembered byulyi talking about sea salt on her lips vaguely.)
stumbling upon jung wheein during a joint art event and getting invited to hangout was even better, she came in the diner with a half-shattered heart and went out with three new nice people in her life. (byulyi's shoulder brushing against her the whole time was kind of distracting but she appreciates it.)
having the world's most unique dorks as her best friends was good.
coming home to byulyi's apartment was good.
(no more coming home to empty space and broken promises. post-breakup remedy never felt this good.)
but moon byulyi was always something else.
there were literal stars in byulyi's eyes. platinum blonde hair cascading perfectly across her back, making her look prettier than the moon. the way her nose crinkled when she's happy made yongsun feel at peace as if the ten deadlines and student loan looming over her didn't exist.
moon byulyi might be the messenger of the moon.
yongsun would think while looking over byulyi staring intently at the corgis in the pet shop.
moon byulyi might be the personification of the moon.
yongsun would think while byulyi reached for the top kitchen shelf with a struggle, her pride of towering over three dwarfs long gone.
even better, moon byulyi might be the moon herself.
yongsun thought as byulyi bit her lips, holding back a moan while yongsun's busy fucking her senseless.
either way, yongsun wouldn't trade byulyi for anything.
anything.
---
yongsun decided she'll go with the cliché trope of candlelit dinners and flowers, just the way byulyi does it. the greasiness definitely wasn't getting into her.
and now she's sitting here, with two plates of steak on the dining table, classic wine, roses spelling out 'would you be mine, moon byulyi', and every single cliché yongsun could thought of.
yongsun's nervous, scared shitless.
what if she messed it up? what if byulyi actually liked someone else and was just toying with her? what if it's all a dream? what if-
this is not the time to panic, remember kim yongsun.
she heard the front door open, senses automatically going on overdrive.
breathe in, breathe out.
"i'm home!"
it's byulyi's husky voice.
breathe in, breathe out.
"yongddunie? where are you?"
the footsteps inched closer.
"what the-"
yongsun snapped her head to look at byul hard enough she heard a crack.
"what the hell moon byulyi-" yongsun's eyes widened twice the actual size.
there stood moon byulyi, platinum blonde hair tied back, white shirt and blue sweater vest. in her arms resided about four different bouquets, with papers spelling out the last thing yongsun expected.
byulyi flushed red.
yongsun became a boiled tomato.
"okay..." byulyi croaked out a response that sounds way too high pitched, "so you wanna date me?"
yongsun looked at byulyi's bouquet and replied with even a higher pitch that's the equivalent of a squeaking frog, "and you wanna marry me?"
byulyi's sudden laughter was beautiful.
yongsun also felt laughter bubbling up her throat.
they're beautiful.
"d-do you even know what the flowers mean? oh my god, i'm laughing so hard-"
"no i didn't, grabbed whatever suits me," byulyi smiled widely and took the seat across yongsun, "but i'm betting you don't know either."
time finally stopped, with this moment.
yongsun waited long enough, byulyi waited long enough. waiting that much was enough.
yongsun said fuck the romantic dinner and yanked byulyi's collar, kissing her like she's the person who mattered the most in the whole world. (she was.)
the way yongsun's lips move against her own made byulyi feel like they were made for each other. (they were.)
maybe, just maybe, byulyi's feeling like the moon, and yongsun's the sun that illuminates her.
kim yongsun. moon byulyi. love.
(byulyi wanted some love, luckily yongsun's ready to give)