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The bond between a vampire and his maker is stronger than you can imagine.
Sookie found herself thinking about that line on their way to Hotel Camilla. It was her, Bill, and Jason in the car. Sookie knew she should be focusing on her brother or Bill after what they had all been through in the past couple days. But dwelling on those days made the girl think of —sweaty hands gripping her where no man but her boyfriend should touch her, vile words spewing from the sweaty man’s lips, fear, fear, fear— No, it was better to dwell on other things. Bill’s maker Lorena was a horrid woman and Sookie wanted desperately to believe that there was nothing left between them.
He’s your maker isn’t he?
Don’t use words you don’t understand.
The bond between a vampire and his maker is stronger than you can imagine.
What did that really mean? Eric, the stupid tall Viking ass, was clearly beyond loyal to Godric. Yet he claimed to not understand ‘love’. What tied them together? Since meeting Bill, Sookie had found that the supernatural went far the ‘virus’ excuse the AVL was trying to feed the public. Was there some kind of mystical tie?
Sookie couldn’t help but grip the fabric of the seats beside her, a wash of fear hitting her that some part of Bill still felt for Lorena the way Eric cared for Godric.
“Sook-eh, what’s wrong?” Her lover looked at her, concerned, and Sookie remembered that Eric would know what she was feeling now too. Ew.
Sookie glanced at Bill, but quickly looked back at her lap. She was probably being silly. Bill would laugh. But…
The bond between a vampire and his maker is stronger than you can imagine.
“A vampire’s maker…” Sookie bit her lip. “What does that really mean? Are you… connected with her?”
“No!” Bill denied emphatically, taking her hands in his. “Sook-eh, I love you. Lorena is nothing.” Jason felt awkward and determined he would stare out the window and pretend he wasn’t here. Sookie almost laughed at her silly brother’s thoughts, but was also grateful he was giving them as much privacy as they could get in this small car.
“I love you too.” She returned, but… “You didn’t answer my question. Eric implied there is some sort of bond?”
“Eric…” Bill practically growled the Viking’s name, “has an unnaturally strong attachment to his maker. Especially for a vampire over 1000 years old.” He sat back against the seat and his voice took on a lecturing tone. Sookie was reminded of the one college course she had tried. The thoughts of all students around her had been too much and the professor a condescending prick. There was some of that superiority in her boyfriend’s voice now, Sookie thought briefly before ruthlessly burying the thought. “When a vampire is turned it does initially create a type of bond, not dissimilar to the bond created when a human drinks vampire blood. Maker and childe can sense each other’s emotions but the maker can block that connection if they so choose. The maker can call their childe to their side, no matter how far away they are. Makers can also issue commands that their childe must obey.”
Sookie looked at her lover, eyes wide with shock. Bill has this kind of connection with Lorena? Bill increased his grip on Sookie hands, probably trying to reassure with the touch, but it kind of hurt. “Don’t worry Sook-eh, this bond can be and, in regards to Lorena and me, has been broken for decades. Once broken, it can never be remade.”
Oh, that’s better, Sookie thought. But then Eric…? Bill answered her question as if he could read her mind. “I am beginning to suspect that the bond between Eric and Godric was never severed. It is highly unusual. Almost unnatural. Children are normally released from the connection to their maker after they gain control on their vampiric abilities. If this was widely known, it would put doubt on Eric as a sheriff as he’s still vulnerable to being given commands from Godric, a sheriff from another kingdom. I never had a good bond with Lorena, and Jessica is troublesome, but I’ve heard that when there is a bond between two loving vampires it can be a powerful thing. However, that’s hardly a description that fits Eric. All together, I find it quite strange that it appears they’re still connected.”
They didn’t talk for the rest of the ride, but Sookie found herself wondering what it would be like to be part of a bond like Eric and Godric’s.
They had arrived back at Hotel Camilla. Bill explained how vampire blood could affect sexual attraction and Sookie felt a new spike of anger at Eric. As Bill retired for the day and Sookie left their bedroom, Eric remained on the southern girl’s mind, despite her best intentions. Sookie thought back to the way Eric acted with Godric, in the church and in the nest—total submission. Was Eric trapped by such a bond? No, everything from Eric’s expression to his posture had been utterly devoted. Though Eric denied the use of the word love, Sookie could think of none better to describe what resided in Eric’s eyes when he looked at his maker. This was clearly the best part of Eric, Sookie decided. It had been strange to see the normally smirking and obnoxious Viking so submissive but it was a good look on him.
Oh no! A blush rose to her cheeks. I’m not supposed to find anything about him attractive!
She worked to quickly remind herself of all the horrible things Eric had done. The most recent was the most glaring offense currently. Tricking her into drinking his blood. The ass! Was the blood already working on her? Bill had explained that she may start feeling sexual attraction towards the Viking. More than I already did? Sookie squashed that thought. When they had first met Bill had told her V could increase libido, but specific attraction? That was new information.
Bill had fed her a very large amount of her blood the second time they saw each other.
Sookie almost stopped walking. No! I already felt for him before that. I did! Fuck Eric and his manipulative asshole-ness! I won’t let him get between Bill and I.
Think about something else, Sookie urged herself. Jason. Her stupid, hound dog brother. Who had apparently spent the last week at a crazy anti-vampire church camp. It was time they had a long talk. How did he even get into these situations?
The meeting with Nan Flanagan left Sookie with a rush of different emotions, most of them regarding Godric. She was still pissed at Eric, but when she saw Bill approach Eric in the wake of Godric leaving, all she wanted to do was pull him back.
“We have a score to settle” Bill’s deep voice rumbled. Sookie felt a burst of annoyance and hoped Bill didn’t realize it was directed at him. She was pissed at Eric, yes. Very pissed. But it was her score to settle, not Bill’s. And…
“Not now” Eric’s normally lively voice was flat.
“Yes, now” Sookie moved to grab his arm. Yes she was angry, but they way Godric had been talking… she was afraid of what those words might mean. But before she reached Bill he had already punched Eric.
“Have I made my point?” Her boyfriend asked. Sookie just wanted to sigh. Men. Always solving things with fists.
“It’s done. I’m part of her now. Get out of the way” Eric shouldered past the younger vampire and disappeared down the corridor after his maker.
Sookie bit her lip. She was still worried about Godric, and a small part of her was worried about Eric too. The way Godric said he was going to be making amends. She shivered and wrapped her arms around herself. He wouldn’t really do…that, would he?
“I’m going to find Godric.” She had to make sure.
Bill objected. “None of this has anything to do with us. Godric is not your concern.” Sookie swallowed her reflexive response. Anger would not be constructive. Of course Godric was her concern. He was a person. He was hurting. But would that matter to a vampire like Bill?
“If it weren’t for him, I wouldn’t be standing here. He’s in pain. He’s suffering. I gotta do something.” Sookie tried to appeal to him. Sookie remembered her Aunt’s pain and the conversation she had overhead so many years ago. Everyone needs someone.
“Don’t you think we’ve done enough for Dallas?” We?? Sookie bit her lip to keep the words back. She still didn’t like this vampire idea of belonging to another person. It was her who had gone into the church. Her who was almost raped. Her who tried to warn the nest about the bomb. All Bill had done was get trapped by Lorena and hit with a flatscreen. That was hardly service to Dallas. Sookie dug her fingers into her sides. That was probably uncharitable. Gran would be disappointed in her. She dug up her better self.
“You of all people should understand how he feels. What if it were you, Bill? What if in eighteen thousand years, you were Godric?” Godric may be the nicest vampire she’s met but Bill is a good one too. He is.
“All right, but I’m coming with you.”
“I wish you could” Sookie lied smoothly, “But it’ll be dawn in a little while.” If Eric was up there, Bill’s presence would not help the situation. This was about Godric. Not Sookie or Eric’s manipulation. Sookie could put it aside for now. Bill had proved he couldn’t.
“If we don’t stay long, I’ll heal.” Sookie found this sweet, but was still a little annoyed he wouldn’t accept her judgement. But she was standing her ground on this. Even though Eric was a world class ass, he shouldn’t have to deal with Bill right now.
“I will not let you take that chance. With Godric there, you don’t have to worry about me.” She wasn’t really worried anyway. Eric may manipulate and smirk, but he had never directly harmed her. His focus would hardly be on her this time anyway.
“You are so tender hearted, you feel obligated, I can see that. But Sookie, in all honesty, what can you do for him?” Bill’s voice was soft, but it still grated. Sookie knew she was a human who couldn’t really help. She didn’t have super strength or blood that healed, but she was a strongly feeling person. Maybe her words would help.
“I don’t know. I just gotta be there. It doesn’t make sense but you understand?”
“I do.” Bill said, but Sookie wasn’t sure he did.
But he was her boyfriend and she shouldn’t be bitter. Sookie kissed him at their door before proceeding to the roof. If there was anything Sookie could do for Godric, she would do it.
Two thousand years is enough.
It’s insanity!
The bond between a vampire and his maker is stronger than you can imagine.
Father. Brother. Son.
Don’t use words you don’t understand.
I won’t let you die alone.
I am beginning to suspect that the bond between Eric and Godric was never severed.
Yes you will. As your maker, I command you.
All these words were tangled up in Sookie’s head as she watched Eric walked back towards the entrance into the Hotel. Bill was right, Sookie thought, Eric and Godric have been bonded for over 1000 years. But not for much longer, the dark part of her mind whispered.
As Eric passed, Sookie reached out. Her previous anger at the Viking didn’t matter now. Not with this. Eric’s hand was cool in hers. Sookie had called him soul-less in her head when she was super mad, but never had the moniker seemed so heartbreakingly appropriate. The normally smug vampire looked empty inside, shoulders slumped and defeated, his eyes endless pits of agony.
“I’ll stay with him. As long as it takes.”
Sookie and Eric passed each other, the Southern belle moving towards Godric as his childe was forced to leave.
Sookie felt as if the sound of each of Eric’s steps echoed in her head and in her heart. She could still hear his pleading sobs ringing in her mind.
“It won’t take long. Not at my age.” Godric’s voice was as soft as ever. Sookie imagined when you got as old as he was, you didn’t need to raise your voice to get your point across.
“You know it wasn’t very smart. The fellowship of the sun part.” Sookie couldn’t help but mention it. Godric had prevented a bloodbath with his presence. If he had died there… the girl couldn’t help but imagine Eric’s empty eyes with a place to direct all that darkness towards. He would have destroyed every last member of the fellowship. Would he have stopped there? Sookie couldn’t help but wonder. She shivered at the thought of the destruction a distraught Viking vampire could cause.
“I know. I thought it might fix everything somehow. But I don’t think like a vampire anymore.” There was something achingly lonely in Godric’s voice. The 2000 year old vampire turned to look at her. His body looked young but you could see his age in his eyes. “Do you believe in God?”
“Yes.” Sookie replied emphatically. The turn in the conversation surprised her, but maybe it shouldn’t. Her pastor always said the thought of death often turned non-believers to God.
“If you’re right...” Godric’s skin was so pale it was nearly translucent. He looked as if a strong wind would blow him away. But she had seen his strength. She knew it wouldn’t. But the sun would. “How will he punish me?” Oh sweetie, Sookie thought.
“God doesn’t punish. God forgives.” Sookie desperately wanted to give her savior some measure of peace. No one should have to die in this much pain. He shouldn’t die at all, she couldn’t help but think.
“I don’t deserve it.” Sookie’s heart broke anew at Godric’s words. The raw pain and suffering was almost too much or her to stand. She knew Godric must have committed some terrible acts in his 2000 years, but all she had known him as was a figure of safety and peace. “But I hope for it.” Godric looked near tears. Sookie wanted desperately to cry herself. She couldn’t help but be reminded of Terry Belfleur, who was haunted by his actions in the Vietnam war.
“We all do.” It was clear to her that Godric desperately wanted atonement. That he had determined the only was to achieve it was to die. That’s not the only option, Sookie wanted to cry out. Godric looked so alone standing there in the pre-dawn light. But he wasn’t alone. Sookie thought again of Eric, the broken emptiness in his eyes as he walked away from the most important person in his undead life. Godric wasn’t just her savior, he was the beloved everything (father, brother,son) to another person. The bond between a vampire and his maker is stronger than you can imagine. This wasn’t just a sad weary soul passing on. This was a devoted son losing his father. “There are other ways to atone.” Sookie felt as if she was swallowing gravel. If Eric hadn’t been able to convince him, Sookie doubted she could. But she could try. “You saved a lot of lives yesterday. You saved me. You could do a lot of good.”
“It’s not enough.” Godric smiled, but it was a brittle broken thing. “Not for all I’ve done.”
“You’re immortal. You have time.” Godric was the kindest vampire she had met. How would the world be better off without him in it?
“You’ll care for him? Eric?” For the first time in this conversation, Sookie caught a glimpse of warmth in Godric’s face as he spoke his progeny‘s name. Sookie thought again of the desolation in every inch of Eric’s tall Viking frame.
“I’m not sure I can.” Eric? Who denied the idea of love until he was losing it? Who she had never seen even a hint of vulnerability until his world began crashing down before him?
Don’t use words you don’t understand. The bond between a vampire and his maker is stronger than you can imagine. Eric’s words continued to haunt her. She didn’t understand.
How could she sooth him through this? How could anything?
Godric turned towards the horizon, drawn by the light of the sun beginning to illuminate the city.
Sookie thought again of all the things Godric had said today, of the good she had seen Godric do, of the depths of agony in Eric’s eyes as he was forced to walk away.
“Are you sure this is the only option?” Sookie had to try. Not just for Godric, but for Eric as well. She had been so mad at Eric for his actions after the bomb, not even a full day ago. But she wouldn’t wish the terror and desolation she had seen in his face on her worst enemy.
“I want to burn.”
Sookie was thrown back in time to when she was but a teenager. Her aunt Linda was sick, slowly dying of cancer. Sookie had been supposed to be getting lunch from the hospital cafeteria, but had forgotten her wallet and had to turn around. But when she was outside the door to her aunt’s hospital room, Sookie didn’t dare interrupt the conversation she overheard.
“I want to just die already.” Sookie and Jason’s aunt had gotten treatment after treatment. Chemo and radiation, over and over again. Her once round face was hollowed, her full head of blonde curls gone.
“Shhh honey.” Adele Stackhouse was sitting at her daughter’s bedside, rubbing soothing circles into Linda’s shoulders.
“I mean it. I’m so tired all the time. I never stop hurting. All I do is throw up. I want to stop treatments.”
“Please don’t say that honey.”
“Why not? They only increase my life expectancy by half a year, if that. I don’t even want to live another day. Bring me my shot gun and I’ll get it over with.” Sookie couldn’t help but gasp, her hands flying to her mouth.
A slap sounded through the room.
“Don’t you ever say that Linda Stackhouse Delahoussaye. I know you’re in pain. I know it hurts. But you will not throw away the Lord’s gift of life. You will not do that to me. To your daughter.”
“Hadley.” Linda whimpered.
“Yes, your daughter. Hadley. Who is about to graduate high school in but a few months. Would you have her go though that without her mother? Life is a gift. And if it is your time is coming upon us than so be it. But you owe it to your daughter to fight for every last minute with her.”
Sookie’s aunt sobbed and sobbed. But the topic of stopping treatment never came up again.
Sookie stared at Godric and wondered. He wanted atonement but didn’t believe he’d ever get it in life. That avenue of attack had been shut down. But Aunt Linda had been convinced to continue with life a little longer for Hadley, could Godric be convinced with Eric?
“If you believe dying is what you must do…” Sookie took in a shaky breath. “Does it have to be now?”
Godric looked back at her, a soft pitying smile on his face. “Two thousand years is enough”.
Sookie took a fortifying breath. Did she really want to argue this with an ancient being? Surely he knew what was best for himself. Eric’s face flashed through her mind again. Yes. “It’s not for Eric.”
The smile faded from Godric’s face. “Do not speak of what you do not understand.” Sookie almost laughed at the similarly to Eric’s words. He seemed a little angry. His face was blank but his voice was curt. That was good. It was working. Maybe. Angry is better than sad and accepting death, right? Even if the though of Godric angry was more than a little bit terrifying.
“You asked me to look after Eric. How can I? How could I, a human he’s known for a couple weeks, comfort him over loosing his most important person, one he’s known for centuries! I’m not like you. I don’t understand what the two of you have been through. But if you meet the sun, no one will. Eric will carry that alone forever. How can I take of him after that?”
Godric narrowed his eyes. His posture was still in a way humans could never achieve. It looked distinctly unworldly and Sookie was struck again with the sense of ‘other’ that vampires had. “Eric is strong. The strongest I have ever known. He is ten times the vampire I am. He will be fine.”
“Fine?” Sookie’s voice shook. “Were you looking at the same Eric I was? He’s devastated! He’s terrified! It doesn’t matter how strong he is! He still needs you!”
“Eric is over one thousand years old. He was Viking king in life and a thousand other things in death. He is a sheriff with his own area and subjects. He has his own progeny with whom he thrives. He doesn’t need me. Eric doesn’t need anyone.”
“I didn’t know someone so old could be do dumb.” OH my god I’m going to die, Sookie thought, if not at his hand than of sheer embarrassment at my own audacity. “As a human, at 25 I’m an adult and I have been for a while. I’m a strong woman, just as strong as Eric, thank you very much. I didn’t need my gran but when she died it tore a hole straight through me. I would have given anything to have more time with her.”
Sookie felt tears finally break loose and slide down her cheeks. Godric looked frozen in front of her.
“Even if I was getting married and having my own kids I’d want her there. Thinking of her still hurts me. I hate that she was murdered! I wanted her to die of old age in her own bed! But at least I have the comfort of knowing she didn’t choose to leave me! You really think Eric will be fine?” Bill’s explanation of what a maker is came back to her. “Then open your bond with Eric. You still have it don’t you? Feel how he feels right now and tell me he’ll be fine.”
“It won’t make a difference. My childe is strong. He is the best thing I have ever done.” Godric said the words simply as if it was the truest thing he had ever said. “He will survive.”
The sky was getting far too bright. She was running out of time. “Open the bond. If you have to die, at least let him know you suffered no pain or regret during it. Or can you not say it will be that way for sure?”
Godric closed his eyes. Sookie held her breath… and then almost screamed in surprise when Godric suddenly dropped. His knees crashed upon the ground and Sookie could see him gasping. She knew it was Eric’s pain reflected in his face.
As the roof door shut behind him, Eric let the silence swallow him. The expensive soundproofing of the hotel doing it’s job. The lack of sound felt appropriate for there was nothing left within him. Godric… Godric was… He fell to the floor, his pitiful sobs echoing in the empty corridor. He was weak. Eric knew this. Godric had tried to instill emotional control in Eric and for the most part he had succeeded. But Godric… Eric had never had emotional control where his maker was concerned. He never thought he would need it.
Father. Brother. Son. Eric was haunted by Godric, and he knew he would be from now on. Forever wondering if there was something he could have said or done. But there was nothing. A dark voice in his head whispered If you had been good enough he would have stayed. Part of Eric knew that wasn’t true, but the larger part accepted it as fact. Eric was a failure and he had failed his maker in the worst of ways.
From where he slumped against the wall he tried to strain his hearing to the roof, but there was nothing. The tall vampire knew he should get up and move to his room, but he couldn’t find the strength. He could feel Sookie’s sadness and desperation. A small part of his heart was wormed at the thought she might be trying to talk Godric out of it. She wouldn’t succeed, he knew, but he clung to small bit of warmth as everything else was hell.
Could you be a companion to death? His maker’s voice whispered within him, from a time long gone. Yes, yes. Eric wanted to call out. Let me be your companion one last time. Let me die too. Eric fell into his despair. Could you walk with me though the world? Through the dark? His emotions and memories swirled in a dark whirlwind within him. I did! Maker, I did. Let me walk with you into the light. Please, he begged, but there was no one there to hear.
Eric didn’t know how much time passed when he suddenly was his by a blast of horror and sadness from Godric. The bond…Godric had opened it again. Eric bolted to his feet, staring desperately at the door to the roof. Hope surged within him, piercing the darkness Eric was drowning in. Godric please. Eric sent everything he was feeling at his maker in one last desperate attempt. Please please please. Don’t do it. Please.
Sookie stared wide-eyed at Godric, hoping beyond hope that her desperate gamble had worked. Time seemed suspended as Sookie watched Godric. His rapid breaths seemed too loud. Blood collected on his lashes, and suddenly time came rushing back in. Godric’s tears streamed down his face. And his back began to smoke.
“Godric!” Sookie rushed forwards, trying to get between the sun and the ancient vampire. “Godric please. Let’s go inside. Please.”
Godric looked up at her and for once looked his physical age. He looked lost. Lost and afraid. “Eric,” he whispered.
“Yes, Eric,” Sookie urged. “Eric is downstairs. Let’s go!”
Godric continued to stare at her. Sookie grabbed at his arms, but her human strength was not up for the task. Sookie felt fresh tears fall down her own face.
“Human tears.” Godric still seemed to be in a daze.
“You asked me to take care of Eric. The best way I can do that is to bring you to him. Godric! Please!” She tugged on him again. Oh my god is that a wisp of flame? “Let’s go to Eric!”
Sookie felt strong arms around her along with sudden movement and then the arms were gone and she stumbled on the interior carpet of Hotel Camilla. Sookie barely heard Godric’s voice. “My child”
“Godric!” Eric’s voice was wrecked, and Sookie watched as the two ancient vampires clung to each other, both of their faces messy with bloody tears and whispering ferociously to each other in what she assumed was Swedish or something similar. Sookie let herself fall back against the wall, the rush of exhaustion hitting her all at once.
Eric curled around his maker, Godric looking even smaller when swallowed up by his child’s impressive. Yet Sookie could tell it was Godric holding the two of them up, Eric a giant limpet across his maker. Sookie smiled. She had done it. She closed her eyes. All is well in the world, Sookie thought, now I can rest. She was just about to let herself slide to the floor and sit down, when strong hands pulled her forward.
“Sookie” Eric’s voice cracked halfway through and she let out a small squeeze of surprise when she felt herself being surrounding by his hulking frame. “I don’t know what you did but thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.”
Later Sookie would tell the Viking that it was speaking of him that had convinced Godric. But for now she simply returned the hug before pushing away. “If it’s alright with y’all, I’m just gonna head to bed.” Sookie turned to the ancient vampire, and in an impulse that she would be embarrassed about later, darted forward and gave Godric a quick but powerful hug before walking swiftly off to her rooms.
The soft exchange in Swedish behind her reassured Sookie and she knew she’d be able to sleep with a smile.