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Mark can still remember the first time he properly met Donghyuck.
"Hey, I've seen you around school, are you a freshman?" Mark asked him while handing him a cup of hot chocolate he ordered. He was downplaying the whole thing, really, but the other boy didn't really need to know that.
The boy just stared at him for a few seconds, looking confused for some reason, before he opened his mouth to reply to Mark. "Oh, yeah, I didn't think you'd recognize me. Or I didn't even think you've seen me before, there's a lot of people in our school."
The boy was right, there was a lot of people in their school, but none of them looked quite like him (it was the hair, the brightest red colour Mark has ever seen on someone's head). And Mark was sure none of them had a voice like him either.
It had been an accident, the way Mark had found himself in the music classroom when he didn't even have a music class that day. After a year of attending the school, he was sometimes still struggling to find his way around it, but that had more to do with the fact that Mark's head was in the clouds most of the time, than with anything else. As soon as he realised he was in the wrong classroom he turned to leave, but then he heard a voice. A boy with the most beautiful voice Mark's ever heard started singing and Mark couldn't move. He just couldn't. He wanted to, but he physically couldn't. Everyone turned to look at him, of course, and it was kind of embarrassing the way he just stood there. He tried to say sorry to the professor, but he just ended up mumbling incoherent words before turning around to quickly storm out of the classroom. The last thing he saw before leaving was the boy looking straight at him while still singing, like Mark's presence there did nothing to interrupt what he was born to do.
Deciding to just say it like it was, for some reason, he smiled carefully at the other boy before he started to speak. "Well, I heard you sing that one time, I don't know if you remember?" he finished awkwardly, suddenly feeling a bit shy.
The boy smiled as well. "I remember," he said simply, patiently waiting for Mark to continue. The once empty coffee shop has started to fill with people a few minutes ago and Mark knew he only had a few more moments before Taeil came to look for him.
"You were really good. Your voice has kind of been stuck in my head ever since," Mark said eventually, nodding at his own words. Then, he excused himself awkwardly and hurried towards the bar, hoping the other boy didn't think he was a complete creep (he wouldn't blame him even if he did). Mark still cringes at the memory.
Luckily, the boy seemed unfazed, because the next time he came to the coffee shop, he introduced himself as Donghyuck, told Mark pretty much everything about himself and deemed that a beautiful start of their friendship. He even called Mark cute in the first five minutes of their conversation. That didn't sit well with Mark since he was older and definitely not cute (manly, maybe?). So, he said all of that to the other boy.
"If anything, I should call you cute!" he finished lamely, which only made Donghyuck start laughing loudly.
"Oh, Mark, you're so much fun!" he managed to say between his laughing fit. It actually took him a while to completely stop laughing and Mark was starting to grow more impatient with every passing second. "Go on then!" he said eventually.
"What?" Mark asked, exasperated.
"Call me cute! Isn't that what you wanted?" Donghyuck asked innocently, tilting his head to the side a little bit.
Mark almost choked on air. "That's absolutely not what I meant! Oh my god, I need to get back to work and you need to leave!"
That only prompted Donghyuck to start laughing louder, his eyes crinkling, and that should've been the first red flag for Mark. The other boy just enjoyed teasing him too much and that was only the second conversation they ever had! All of that should've been a warning sign for Mark that the rest of their friendship was gonna be exactly like that, if not worse. But, he ignored it, too fascinated by Donghyuck's whole being, for some reason, and now, almost three years later, he's in too deep and with the biggest crush on his best friend.
It all started a few months ago. Now that Mark thinks about it, it probably started even before that, but if there's only one word to describe Mark, it would be clueless. So, it all officially started a few months ago.
Donghyuck had just gotten back from his trip to China with Sicheng and he was acting weird. Well, even weirder than usual.
"I missed you a lot these past few weeks, you know?" he said while they were hanging in Mark's bedroom, the day after his return.
Mark was playing video games by himself, while Donghyuck was sitting right under the AC, still complaining about how hot he was.
It was the way he said it, loaded with something Mark couldn't understand, that made him turn around to look at the other boy, sending him a questioning glance. "Yeah? That's nice."
Donghyuck whined. "Maaaark."
"What?" He brought his attention back to the screen in front of him, sensing where this was going and hoping he managed to convey that he wasn't in the mood for Donghyuck's antics.
"Say it back!" he said loudly, in that annoying, nasally voice of his. Mark felt a headache coming. There was no way he was getting out of this, he never does. He literally never has it his way with the other boy. Sighing loudly, he turned around, only to find Donghyuck already heading his way.
"Say it back!" he said again, quieter this time, but somehow with more intent. He was standing right in front of Mark, staring him down intensely.
"Oh my god, fine! I missed you too. Are you happy now? Can I go back to my game?" Mark asked, already turning around to take his console back and start another game.
"If you want to."
Mark decided in that moment that this Donghyuck was his least favourite Donghyuck. He could deal with the loud and obnoxious one, he would take that Donghyuck in a heartbeat if that meant not dealing with this. He just couldn't understand what the other boy was trying to do. Did he want him to stop playing games and give him his undivided attention? He almost always did, but he would always demand it, being completely unapologetic about it. This, whatever it was, was new.
Deciding not to chance it any further, he put down his console, turning around to face Donghyuck. The boy was already looking at him, something unreadable in his expression, but it was gone before Mark could try to decipher it. "All right, what do you want to do? And why are you just standing there," he motioned vaguely at the other boy, "hovering over me?"
Donghyuck snorted, taking a step closer towards Mark. "Would you rather I sat on your lap?"
There it was again. The impending headache. "Go back to the bed, now!"
That only made Donghyuck laugh loudly. "Ooh, Mark, who taught you to talk like that?" he asked, effectively avoiding the pillow Mark threw at him. "But, your face when you said it, you looked so serious. It was funny, you have to admit it was funny."
"I'm not admitting anything and you're going home. I've had enough of you for today."
"But you admitted you missed me while I was gone, though," Donghyuck said innocently, which was ridiculous, because there was nothing innocent about him.
"Only because you made me," Mark spat back.
"But you did really miss me, right?"
It was getting ridiculous, this thing, and Mark slowly started to lose his patience. "Oh my god, Hyuck, why is it so important to you to know that I missed you?"
At that, Donghyuck finally moved from his spot where he was standing annoyingly close to Mark. He turned around and started walking towards the door. "I guess it's not that important. Anyway, I'll be heading home now."
Mark whipped his head around. "Wait, you're really going home?"
The other boy stopped, but still didn't turn to face Mark. "Yeah."
"But you just got here." Mark hated to admit it, even to himself, but he could feel himself starting to pout. And by Donghyuck's reaction, he knew it too. He finally turned to look at Mark again, crossed his arms and stubbornly said: "Well, you told me to leave!"
"I was joking, Hyuck." It wasn't that Mark was desperate for the other boy to stay, but he would definitely appreciate it. The truth was, Mark got pretty bored the last few weeks without Donghyuck to make his days more interesting. It was summer break and Mark's gotten used to spending his summers with the other boy for the past few years. It was like a tradition, almost. They would do their own things too, with Mark having a job at the coffee shop and Donghyuck being busy with the choir, but they would always make time for each other and spend some time together, at least a few times a week. So, understandably, the past few weeks have been kind of difficult for Mark. He did have other friends, but none of them were as funny or as interesting as Donghyuck. Because, despite how annoying and clingy the other boy could get, he was still Mark's favourite.
"So, you want me to stay?"
Okay, Mark knew what Donghyuck was doing. But, he wasn't gonna lie to him. "Yeah," he answered simply.
That made Donghyuck smile, but it was the kind of smile you don't want directed at you. It made Mark gulp. "And why would that be?"
So, yeah, Donghyuck was evil, but Mark really missed him and, at that point, there was literally no other way than letting the other boy get what he wanted. "Oh my god! You know what, fine! I want you to stay because we haven't seen each other in two weeks and I missed you. And I'm not just saying that because you clearly want to hear it, for some reason, I really did miss you. Now go sit on the bed and try not to be annoying for a while."
"I love it when you talk..."
"Not another word Donghyuck!"
It was a relief, going back to their usual banter (just Donghyuck roasting Mark, really) after Donghyuck's slightly weird behavior from earlier. It was probably nothing, Mark supposed, but he also knew the other boy really well, so much that he could pick up even the slightest of changes in the other's demeanor. Fuck, it was definitely something, but what, Mark had no idea.
It's not that Mark is jealous, that is not it, but the guy currently trying to dance with Donghyuck is bad news. Mark is sure of it. He's been trying to put his greasy hands on Donghyuck's body for a good ten minutes now and Donghyuck has been effectively avoiding him. He's still on the dance floor, though, dancing with Johnny and Ten like he doesn't have a care in the world and laughing at who knows what, but the guy is not giving up. He follows Donghyuck wherever he moves and he's clearly not intimidated by Johnny's stern looks. So, yeah, he's bad news and the way he's just sure Donghyuck is interested in him is infuriating to Mark.
Next to him, Sicheng scoffs. "That guy doesn't really know how to quit, does he?"
Mark turns his head to look at Sicheng. "Right? I'm glad I'm not the only one being bothered by this." Of course Sicheng would hate it too if someone was, very obviously, trying to get into his best friend's pants. Mark feels immensely better after hearing that. This is normal. What he feels is completely normal. But, does Sicheng want to strangle this guy too?
"Well, I'm not really bothered by it. It's mostly funny how he can't take a hint."
Right, funny. That's how Mark feels too. Well, it is kind of funny. It's funny how ugly the guy looks, that's what's funny. The way his shirt is hugging his funny looking toned arms and the way his perfectly styled, but still funny, hair is covering his funny blue eyes. His leather pants are funny too. Fuck, this guy is hot and Mark can't even pretend anymore that he isn't. So, why isn't Donghyuck all over him?
Like he could sense what Mark was thinking about, Sicheng says "He's not really Hyuck's type."
This catches Mark's attention. "And what is his type?" he blurts out and, after being met with Sicheng's raised eyebrows, he quickly adds, "I'm just curious! He never talks about it with me."
Sicheng takes a deep breath before he starts talking again. "I think he likes nerds. Like, slightly awkward guys, possibly. But like, cute ones. You know?" No, Mark doesn't know. And why does Donghyuck's ideal guy sound so lame? After he doesn't say anything for almost a minute, Sicheng looks at him again, probably to check if Mark even heard him. Of course Mark heard him, he just doesn't know what to say.
"That's cool, I guess. But, sounds a bit lame, if you ask me," he blurts out in the end, and it's fine, he's not even mad at himself for saying stupid things anymore. He's tipsy and too tired to care about such trivial things now. But then Sicheng laughs, properly and very loudly, and Mark has no idea what's so funny all of a sudden.
"Oh, you think? You would say that guy is lame?" he asks, barely managing to hold himself together after that sudden outburst a few seconds ago. Mark doesn't know what this is about, but he doesn't like it. And he doesn't appreciate Sicheng talking to him in this weird, patronizing way.
"What's so funny?" he asks almost angrily, almost desperate to know what's going on. When Sicheng doesn't answer him and only starts laughing harder, Mark scoffs, defeated. "I hate being out of the loop."
"Mark, just stop talking, you're gonna make me piss my pants. You're literally always out of the loop, what are you talking about?"
Okay, first of all, gross. Second of all, "No, I'm not, I just- "
"I need a drink right about now!" It's Donghyuck, stumbling slightly, all sweaty and hot from all the dancing he did. He looks between them curiously. "What, did I miss something?"
Mark really hopes Sicheng is not one of those drunk types who think it's hilarious to expose their friends. "Don't you worry about that," he says casually, like he wasn't dying of laughter just a few seconds ago. Then, he throws his right arm around Donghyuck and grabs his drink with his other hand. "So, what about that guy?"
Donghyuck glances at Mark quickly, before throwing Sicheng's arm off his shoulder rather harshly. "What about him? He's just some annoying guy that I didn't want to spend time with. And I told him that right away! It's not my fault he can't take a hint!"
He's looking at Mark again and Mark just wants to hug him and tell him that he's perfect. So he does the next best thing. "It's okay, Hyuck," he says, patting his shoulder awkwardly. "What do you want to drink? Sicheng and I ordered some fruity cocktails earlier, do you wanna try mine?"
Donghyuck doesn't just try it, he drinks half of the glass in two big gulps, smiling apologetically at Mark afterwards. "It was really good. Here, let me buy you another one," he says then, signalizing bartender to come over.
"No, I was gonna buy you one," Mark protests, taking out his own money.
Donghyuck shakes his head. "No, but I nearly finished your glass, I should - "
"Oh my fucking god! This is ridiculous!" Sicheng shouts from where he's standing next to Donghyuck. If Mark's being honest, he forgot Sicheng was still there. "Yuta just texted me he's here, so I'm gonna go find him. And I'm buying the drinks, it's my birthday after all." He grabs his wallet and hands the money to the unimpressed looking bartender. "He'll have what the other one is having." Then, he turns to look at them again. "So you two just relax and talk like normal people. Okay, bye," and with that he leaves.
Donghyuck turns around to finally take his drink, smiling shyly at the bartender. Mark scoffs. "What's his deal?"
"He's just trying to look after me, I guess."
And if that doesn't sound vague and confusing to Mark right now. "Okay," he says carefully. "So, what do you wanna do right now? Do you wanna dance?"
Donghyuck shakes his head. "No, I'm fine." Then, his eyes become large. "Did you want to dance? I can definitely dance if you want to, I'm not that tired."
Mark chuckles. Why is Donghyuck so cute? "No, I'm fine here. Or, actually, I could use some air. Do you wanna go outside?"
Donghyuck quickly nods and takes Mark's hand in his. It feels nice, but that's not exactly new. They start walking towards the exit and Mark turns around to take a look at Johnny and Ten who are still on the dance floor. It doesn't look like they need any company if the position they're currently in is any indication, so Mark's not worried. There's a lot of people in the club, but they still manage to catch a glimpse of Sicheng and Yuta in the corner, holding hands while Yuta's whispering something in Sicheng's ear, standing awfully close to him. And then it's Mark's fault for mistaking their weird friendship for a relationship. Right.
It's cold outside, which is not a problem for Mark since he remembered to bring his jacket with him. Donghyuck wasn't so smart.
"I'm not that cold," Donghyuck defends himself, but he's clearly lying since he's practically shaking.
Mark rolls his eyes. "Don't lie, it's obvious that you're freezing."
"Well, I'm not gonna take your jacket, if that's what you meant!"
Mark scoffs. "That's absolutely not what I meant. Then I'd be freezing. It's your fault you didn't bring a jacket with you."
It's Donghyuck who scoffs this time. "What a gentleman, Mark." He crouches and leans on the wall behind him and Mark follows suit. It's actually a beautiful night, cold weather aside, or maybe Mark's just in a good company. He's not sure anymore, he's not sure about anything these days. Well, there's one thing he's pretty sure he's sure about.
"How drunk are you?" he asks and it must've been sudden because Donghyuck jumps a little. Maybe he was busy thinking about things, too.
He considers it for a few seconds. "Not really drunk. Tipsy at best. I only had a couple of shots and half of that cocktail. Well, actually two halves, I did drink half of yours as well. So I guess I had one whole cocktail," he says, chuckling a bit. It's all too careful and unlike Donghyuck to act like this. They've never been awkward around each other before. Maybe awkward isn't the right word, but he is acting strange, and he has been for a while now.
"Yeah, me neither." He chances a glance at Donghyuck and finds him already looking back at him. He looks really nice, he always does, but he looks particularly nice tonight.
Mark looks away before asking, "So, do you like anyone?" He doesn't know why he's feeling as nervous as he does, it's just a simple question, though it is unusual for them to be talking about this. But, Mark hates it, hates that Donghyuck doesn't feel like he can tell him stuff like that, because he can. And Mark will listen, even if it makes him feel weird.
There's a lack of emotions on Donghyuck's face, so Mark can't tell what he's thinking about or how he's feeling. It's very frustrating. "Why do you ask?"
"I'm just curious. We never talk about it, which - I get it, you have Sicheng, of course you'll wanna talk about it with him, he's your best friend. But, you can also talk to me about it." It's weird, speaking so seriously to Donghyuck. Not that they're never serious, but they do prefer to keep their conversations light and Donghyuck prefers to tease Mark above anything else. It's nice, though, when Donghyuck shares something with Mark, something he didn't even talk to Sicheng about. It makes Mark feel special.
It's easier to read him now, because Donghyuck has his serious and determined face on. Mark knows that face really well. "You're my best friend too. And I'm sorry for making you think I don't trust you."
Mark shakes his head. "I didn't think you didn't trust me, it just looks like you're not comfortable with talking to me about it."
"Well, you don't talk about that stuff with me either. I had to find out from Sicheng that you're into guys." And Mark shouldn't be surprised by this, of course Sicheng would tell Donghyuck. But the fact that he himself talked to Sicheng about it first, without telling Donghyuck anything at all, not even later, is still terrifying to him. What is he so scared of? It's just Donghyuck. But, that's exactly it, isn't it? It's Donghyuck. And how is he supposed to feel about that?
Donghyuck is still looking at him, worry in his eyes as he puts his hand on Mark's shoulder. "I'm sorry, it's okay. You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to. And Sicheng only recently told me about it, don't be mad at him."
Mark sighs tiredly, dropping his head low. "I'm not mad. And I'm sorry for not telling you and telling Sicheng instead." He lifts his head then to look at Donghyuck, hoping the other boy will magically know how he feels just by looking at him. And Donghyuck, well, he always knew how to read and understand Mark, but the next thing he says only makes Mark more nervous.
"About that. Was there maybe a reason you didn't tell me? I mean, I'm your only best friend, you basically don't have an excuse."
"Hey, Jeno exist!" Mark protests, thankful for the chance to avoid talking about what Donghyuck wants to talk about a little longer.
Donghyuck rolls his eyes. "Jeno has Jaemin. You'll never be his number one and you know it!"
Mark shrugs. Well, he isn't wrong about that. "But, can he talk to Jaemin about basketball?" he asks, cleverly remembering that he and Jeno are also teammates. There's a special bond between people who train and play together, Donghyuck just doesn't get it. And, apparently, he's not impressed.
"Nobody cares about sports, Mark," he says, like that's the most obvious thing in the world and Mark is being ridiculous for even mentioning it. "Anyways, back to what's important. When did you even tell Sicheng? Where was I?"
There's no way he's getting out of this. This conversation is happening, because Donghyuck wants it to happen, so Mark can might as well be honest about it. "Remember when we were all at his place while he was getting ready for a date with that kid, I forgot his name? When I actually told Sicheng I thought he and Yuta were together? It was while we were alone in his room, while I was helping him decide what to wear."
Donghyuck is listening to him intently and he doesn't speak until Mark is finished, even though Mark can tell he already has a lot to say. "Okay, first of all, how dare you forget Renjun's name?" Donghyuck fakes a gasp, but Mark knows he's probably being serious. He hit it off with Renjun as soon as Sicheng introduced the two, announcing he would probably take Renjun's side if they ever broke up. Mark knows all of this and he still managed to forget Renjun's name. He's kind of disappointed in himself. Renjun definitely deserves better. "He was the best thing that ever happened to Sicheng," Donghyuck continues and then he gives Mark a serious look. "Second of all, that was almost a year ago!"
A few people passing turn around to look at them and Mark gives them an apologetic smile. Then, he turns around to look at Donghyuck and gives him, what he hopes, is a stern look. "It's 1am Hyuck, don't shout!"
Donghyuck only rolls his eyes. "Whatever. So?"
"I knooow," Mark whines, "I was stupid. But, it's different with you. It was easy to tell him or Jeno, but it's different with you." It's scary talking about this, especially with Donghyuck, but Mark knows it's too late to back out now.
"And why is that, Mark?"
"I don't know," he answers, which is only a half truth.
Donghyuck looks disappointed. "Okay," he says eventually.
"You definitely played a role there, you know? You're always so sure of yourself and you already knew - when we met you already knew you were gay, so that definitely helped me realize some things. And how close we were, from the beginning, that was also helpful." He's stepping into the dangerous territory now, but he can't seem to stop himself.
Donghyuck is looking at him, huge eyes paying so much attention to everything Mark's saying, trying to process and understand his thoughts and Mark knows it's a lot, even he doesn't understand himself most of the time.
Eventually, Donghyuck speaks and he's using his gentle voice, clearly trying to sound as careful as possible. Maybe he's worried he'll scare Mark off if he says the wrong thing. Mark doesn't think that's necessary anymore. What could be scarier than talking to your best friend, turned crush, about your complicated feelings for them? Oh right, if said crush doesn't feel the same way, that would definitely make the whole thing scarier.
"I'm glad I helped you realize things, I really am. But, Mark, this is so vague, I honestly don't know what you're trying to say." He then looks away and takes a deep breath. "I don't know, maybe this is just me reading too much into it. I don't know."
Here's the thing about Donghyuck - he's almost never nervous. There's just not much that can make him lose his cool. But, on the rare occasions when it happens, he becomes a mess. Mark's seen it a few times, it's not pretty. This, though - Mark has never seen Donghyuck like this. "This is so uncomfortable, I hate it. I feel like I'm gonna throw up."
Mark starts to panic a little at that, sending Donghyuck a worrying glance. The other boy doesn't look so good, he's breathing heavily and Mark is scared, both for him and of what he previously said.
"Are you really feeling sick? Do you want some water? Do you want to go home?"
"I don't want water, Mark, water is not gonna solve anything! I just want everything to be clear for once and to finally see if we're on the same page."
He's not shouting, he looks too tired for that, but his tone is not gentle anymore. He's lost his patience, Mark knows, and he feels so bad. Mark feels so bad, but he doesn't know if he can fix this tonight. There's a lot to unpack here and he's not ready, doesn't know what to say or how to make things better. Donghyuck deserves only the best in the world and Mark is definitely not it. Fuck, he can't even express his feelings properly, can't even understand them himself. But Donghyuck is braver than him. He knows what he wants and Mark's now pretty sure Donghyuck wants him. And that is the scariest thing of all. Goddammit, he's the nerd Sicheng was talking about, isn't he?
"I'm sorry." He doesn't look at Donghyuck, can't bear to see his inevitably disappointed face, but it doesn't matter, because there's disappointment in his voice too and Mark can't escape that.
"Is that it? You're sorry? There's nothing else you want to say?" he asks, not even waiting for Mark's confirmation before he continues, "Okay, I'll talk then. I love you. I've been in love with you since forever and I have to say it, Mark, I can't keep pretending anymore. I'm so tired of pretending, you have no idea, it's literally impossible for me anymore not to show it somehow every time we're together. I know it sounds dramatic, but it's the truth. And I know this is probably a lot to hear all of a sudden, and I'm sorry, but I just can't hide it anymore." It's almost like he said it all in one huge breath and when it's over, Mark is both relieved and terrified. Donghyuck is staring at him, unrelenting and beautiful and Mark has to look away. Everything is too much. The other boy sighs tiredly, abandoning his crouching position to properly sit on the ground. "I'm not trying to pressure you or anything, but can you just please tell me how you feel? I need to know. Please."
There's so much going on in Mark's head, so many things he wants to say and even more things he wants to keep to himself, never share them with anyone. Mark is a private person, always has been. He would always protect himself by not oversharing and not revealing too much, but that just doesn't seem that important anymore. Why would he want to protect himself from something this good, something this beautiful? Why would he want to protect himself from Donghyuck?
Mark is still Mark, though, so in the end, out of all the things he could've said, he chooses to go with: "You shouldn't be sitting on the ground, it's too cold."
There's a moment of complete silence, where Mark is both scared for his life and thinks he deserves whatever's coming, but after giving him the most incredulous look, Donghyuck gets up to finally leave and Mark can't have that.
"No, no, no, come back please, I'm an idiot, please come back!"
"Stop shouting Mark, it's too late!" Donghyuck says mockingly and Mark notes that his impressions of Mark are continuously getting better. "And it's too cold, how am I supposed to stay out?"
The good thing is that Donghyuck is still there, he's still standing in front of Mark, waiting to hear what he has to say. The bad things is, he looks like he might flee any second, like he's just waiting for another stupid thing to come out of Mark's mouth so that he could leave for good.
"Okay, okay, I get it! Just, please, don't go!" Mark pleads, aware that he sounds almost desperate now, but he doesn't even care anymore, only cares about fixing this.
Donghyuck fixes him with a strong gaze, lifting his eyebrow questioningly before he snorts and says: "Why, do you have something to say?"
"Yes. I do, just give me a second, okay?" That's what he needs, a second or two to sort his messy thoughts and come up with something smart to say. Doesn't sound so difficult. Okay, it doesn't have to be that smart, he just needs to say something acceptable before Donghyuck gets away for real this time. Shit, why isn't his brain working? "Okay, so. Okay. One more second, okay?"
"Mark!"
"Okay, okay. Wow, this is really hard. Like, how do you even confess to someone?" he blurts out without thinking, starting to panic the second the words are out of his mouth, but then he sees Donghyuck's furiously blushing face and he feels slightly better.
"Oh my god, you're literally the worst. I can't believe this!" Donghyuck says incredulously, but there's a tiny smile threatening to spread over his face and Mark manages to catch it before the other boy turns his head around, obviously trying to hide it. And if that's not the cutest shit Mark's seen all night.
"Okay, I got it! So, you know how you always say you're really funny and smart and how you look really good when you wear those black skinny jeans?" he asks, hoping Donghyuck will bear with him just a little bit longer until he hopefully gets to the point.
"Yeah?"
"Well, I think that too. Actually, I think you always look good. Like tonight, you look really good right now. Anyways, it's more than that. You get me and you're patient with me, like right now. You're still here after all of the stupid shit I said. And, I don't know, I kind of always want to be with you. Like, with my other friends, even with Jeno, I like to spend time with them, but it gets boring pretty easily. It's never boring with you, I think I would have fun even if we were just sitting and talking. And your voice, oh my god, you literally sound like an angel, I don't even know how it's possible for someone to have a voice like that. And it took me a long time to realize this, I guess, because I could never be sure if I just liked you as a person or if there was something else there. Even after realizing I liked guys, I told myself that had nothing to do with you and how I'm just confused because we're really close."
"And what about now? Are you sure now?" Donghyuck asks carefully, eyes huge and so hopeful, and Mark notes that he's close, so much closer than before and Mark wonders if he was the one who subconsciously reduced the distance between them. It makes sense, he's the one always gravitating towards Donghyuck without much of a choice of his own. Mark doesn't think he minds it one bit, not anymore.
"I think I just need to do something first, just to make sure." This close, with hardly any distance between them, it only makes sense that Mark ends up looking at Donghyuck's lips. But now he can't look away and he would normally feel extremely embarrassed about this, only if he wasn't completely entranced by the other boy, to the point where he didn't care about anything else.
"Are you talking about kissing me?"
"Yeah. If that's okay with you."
"I'm gonna kill you if you don't like it, Mark, I swear! And Sicheng's gonna kill you for breaking my heart." Donghyuck says softly, his voice lacking any bite and not at all fitting with the threatening words he just used. Mark distantly wonders if there are other people around them, outside of the club or somewhere across the street. Surely, there has to be someone else that also stepped out, needing some air or smoke in their lungs. They couldn't be completely alone.
It feels like it, though. Mark can only see one person right now and when he feels Donghyuck clinging to his jacket loosely, he doesn't think he wants to waste any more time. "Okay, I'll take that chance."
It's like something pulled him towards the other boy, without him deciding when or how to do it. He doesn't remember thinking "I'm going in, I'll do it now", he just knows he's kissing Donghyuck all of a sudden and, for once, his mind is blank. He can only feel the fire Donghyuck ignited once their lips touched, deep inside his being. He feels lightheaded and overwhelmed way too soon and when he pulls away for air, Donghyuck is staring at him, wide eyed and so, so beautiful.
"So?" he asks quietly, his voice barely a whisper. Mark can see he's scared, but still so hopeful and he wants to laugh at the absurdity of his question.
"I think we might be soulmates."
That seems to pull Donghyuck together, his previously concerned expression getting replaced with disbelief, his voice getting that usual teasing tone back. "What, just from that one kiss? Didn't know you were that easy, Mark." And then, after a few moments of Mark just staring at him dumbly, he adds: "Soulmates are not real, you know that, right?"
Mark doesn't exactly appreciate a tone like that, not even from his soulmate, who's suddenly acting like that is the stupidest thing Mark has ever said, which - it definitely isn't, Mark's said a lot of stupid shit in his life, hell, he even said worse things than this tonight. "Well, I don't know, maybe they're not, but -"
Donghyuck is quick to butt in, "They most certainly are not."
"But," Mark continues loudly, sending Donghyuck a disapproving glance, not thankful for the interruption, "It feels like that. I don't think there's anyone else for me."
There's a few seconds of silence, where Donghyuck looks like he's deep in thought and Mark is about to take it all back and laugh it off when the other boy finally speaks: "So this is how it's gonna be? I'll have to get used to you saying shit like that?" There's a pause, but not long enough for Mark to try to defend himself. "I kinda hate myself for this, but I love it," Donghyuck says, finally smiling after what felt like forever and Mark is so relieved.
"Yeah, I figured you would," he says proudly.
Donghyuck snorts. "You didn't figure shit, you didn't even know I liked you. I've liked you for years without you noticing anything."
Mark pouts, but then he remembers something. "I did notice you were acting a bit weird lately," he cleverly points out.
"Good job, you're really perceptive," Donghyuck says sarcastically, patting him on the shoulder, but then his hand just stays there, stroking Mark's arm, like he can't get enough of touching him, and Mark gets it. He feels the same way.
"Okay, I'm gonna kiss you again, this argument is going nowhere," he says, pulling Donghyuck even closer to him, all the way until their noses are touching. Mark can't help but smile. He can't remember a single moment where he was happier than now. And when he looks at Donghyuck, he thinks the other boy feels the same.
"Yeah, that would be the best thing to do right now," he says, glancing at Mark's lips.
Mark smirks. "You think?"
Donghyuck rolls his eyes impatiently. "Just do it!"
"Okay," he says, closing his eyes and the distance between them.
Suddenly, there's a loud noise somewhere behind them and it startles Mark enough that he jumps a little bit, turning around quickly, only to see Sicheng standing there, a look of pure joy on his face. "Fucking finally!"