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Published:
2019-08-15
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2021-07-11
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5/6
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i hate accidents (except when we went from friends to this)

Summary:

best friend
(noun)
a person you can trust with your whole life. someone you have fun with, who you trust and confide; the first person you call when you get good or bad news. someone who has seen the best and worst of you and still will be there whenever you need them.

Notes:

very vaguely, a FRIENDS au

warnings for mentions of sex, though nothing actually explict

Chapter 1

Notes:

As of July 12th, 2022 this work has been edited.
English is not my first language so before posting chapter 6 I went back and re-edited chapters 1 through 5.
Nothing changed plot wise.

Chapter Text

"Hypothetically," Alyssa says abruptly, startling Emma when she ungracefully drops down next to her on the loveseat at the coffeehouse. "If I asked, would you marry me?"

Emma's face goes red when she chokes on the sip of coffee she had just taken.

"Would you buy me dinner or something first?" She asks weakly, her voice sounding panicky and high pitched as she tries to recover.

Alyssa's only answer is a huff of breath; she makes it sound petulant somehow. Emma notices out of the corner of her eyes that she's crossing her arms and pouting. She thinks she looks too much like a puppy to be taken seriously.

"I was just on the phone with my mom," Alyssa finally says and Emma nods slowly as if it all makes sense now.

"Ah, that explains it," Emma relaxes back on the couch and tells her heart to stop racing. "You want to marry me to piss her off enough that she'll never speak to you again."

"What, no," Alyssa shakes her head and looks at Emma, a crease in between her brows. "You know what she is like. This time she just kept going on and on about how if I don't find someone soon and settle down and get married and have kids, I'll die alone and old. And alone." Alyssa huffs again and Emma can feel the exasperation coming from her in waves. "Not with those exact words, but you get it."

Emma watches as Alyssa takes in a couple of slow breaths, obviously trying to calm herself down, before swiftly reaching for Emma's mug and taking a long sip, immediately grimacing at the taste. "Is this black coffee?"

"Yes, it is." Emma takes her mug back and sips the coffee, exaggeratedly sighing in delight just to annoy Alyssa. "Thanks, I bought it for myself."

"Gross," Alyssa shudders dramatically. "I'm not going to die alone, right?" She jumps right back to where they were, Emma almost gets whiplash. She sounds genuinely uncertain; Emma doesn't know if it's a serious question or not, so she doesn't say anything. "I mean, I'm twenty-five. I was in a serious relationship just last year, for heaven's sake!" Alyssa scoffs loudly, waving a hand around and generally sounding a bit unhinged.

“Right?”

"The way she talks makes me feel like I'm an old lady on her deathbed whose biggest regret is that she never got kids, and now there's no one to be there for her when she dies."

Emma's lip twitches in amusement as she watches Alyssa frown in concentration. Knowing her, she’s probably picturing the scenario in her head and griefing imaginary Alyssa’s lonely death

"That's… oddly specific," Emma says, hiding her smirk behind her mug when she takes another sip of coffee.

Alyssa sighs, pursuing her lips as she looks away from Emma and down at the small coffee table, only then noticing the muffin sitting on a plate there. Her eyes flicker from Emma to the muffin, then back to Emma before she decides to pick it up anyway, immediately taking a large bite.

"So, you'll do it?" She asks around her mouthful, crumbs sticking to her chin.

"Do what?"

"Marry me, Emma."

Emma's heart skips a beat at the question, but that's understandable given the fact that someone has just proposed to her; it's not because it's Alyssa. Nope.

She opens and closes her mouth a couple of times, deciding how to best answer that.

Why was she even considering saying yes?

"Uh, like… right now?"

"Not right this second, no," Alyssa takes another bite of the muffin and stares thoughtfully at Emma as she chews. "I meant it more like if we're both single by the time we're forty, then we marry each other and have a baby together," she explains, as nonchalant as she can be after she swallows the food.

"Oh. Right. Maybe lead with that next time?" Alyssa nods but still looks like she's waiting for an answer. Emma groans. "So, I'm your backup plan then?"

"Kind of?" Alyssa shrugs.

"Did everyone else say no?"

"Actually, you're the first person I'm asking," Alyssa says, polishing off the rest of the muffin in a single bite.

"Really?" Emma is taken aback by that. That's certainly not the answer she was expecting. "Why?"

"Well," Alyssa holds one finger up for Emma to see. "You're my best friend. Why wouldn't you want to spend the rest of your life with me? Remember that time at the beach when you peed on me? That's how good friends we are."

Emma winces with embarrassment as she is forced to remember that day, quickly covering her face with a hand. "We promised to never talk about it. Ever!"

Alyssa ignores Emma. She holds a second finger up. "We're both gay, so that would make sense." Then a third finger is held up, "I can't ask Shelby because she and Kaylee are each other's back up. I'm not even going to mention Nick, so that leaves Kevin. He's sweet, but I don't know how it would work between us since I'm a lesbian and he's a guy. You were my only option, to begin with."

She finishes her speech with a smile that Emma fights to not find endearing. Finally, she lowers her hand with a flourish, her gaze expectant.

"I'm flattered.”

"Is that a yes?"

Emma nods slowly then thinks better and shakes her head, "wait, why do you assume I'm gonna be single when I'm forty?"

"Emma," Alyssa says slowly; she's using the tone of voice that implies that Emma should stop and give her a direct answer or else. Emma almost wants to laugh, but she doesn't because she feels like Alyssa is maybe just a little more serious than she had initially thought.

"Yes, Alyssa," Emma says with resignation and only a bit of amusement, plus something else she refuses to acknowledge. "If we're both single and desperate by the age of forty, then we can marry each other and have as many babies as you wish, so neither of us dies alone." She ends her sentence with a good-natured roll of her eyes, picking up her mug to finish her almost cold coffee now.

"Yes!" Alyssa pumps a fist up and bounces a little on the couch's cushions; Emma’s smile is involuntary. "Thank you. You're the best, Em," she says with soft eyes. Emma's heart flutters a little; maybe she shouldn't have had that second coffee on an empty stomach. "I'm gonna get a coffee too," Alyssa nods in the direction of the counter where Angie is chit-chatting with a patron. "Do you want anything?"

"A muffin?"

"I can do that for you."

 

"So, Kaylee and Shelby?" Emma asks when Alyssa is sitting down next to her again. A plate with some cookies and a new muffin in one hand and a mug in another. "Is it weird that I can see that happening?"

"I can see it, too," Alyssa nods, taking a sip of her own overly sweet, probably extra caramel, coffee. "It kind of makes sense. And it's better than Kaylee getting back with Nick; that's for sure."

Emma grimaces, briefly remembering the mess that had been.

"I kind of always thought that Kevin and Shelby had a thing for each other and were just too dumb to realize."

"That too," Alyssa nods, "but who knows."

"Do you ever think about the fact that it is the middle of the afternoon and we're here just like, gossiping about our friends' love lives?"

"It's the reason why we made sure they would be anywhere else while we're here."

"That and we wanted a few hours break from their nonsense."

Alyssa shakes her head, but she's smiling.

"Are you going to play something today?"

She's looking in the direction of the makeshift stage near the entrance of the coffeehouse. There's a microphone in front of a stool and a guitar on a stand. It was there for anyone that would like to play, and Alyssa would occasionally bully Emma into doing it because she wouldn't otherwise, but mainly because Alyssa liked it when she sang.

Emma always had an incredible voice for singing; she was talented enough that she could have made a career out of it if she had wanted to. Alyssa knows she had taken some music classes in college, though she ended up choosing to major in something else in an attempt to appease her parents when she came out and they stopped talking to her. It obviously didn’t work, but Emma still finished the degree anyway.

"If I feel like it.” Emma says slowly, avoiding looking in Alyssa’s direction. “ Later though," She shrugs noncommittally.

Alyssa knows that means she'll probably try and come up with an excuse not to do it.

"Now, please?"

"Alyssa."

"Emma."

"No."

A beat.

Emma takes a bite of her muffin, still looking anywhere but Alyssa to avoid seeing her pouting. It's a cheap trick; she's not falling for it this time.

"But I like it when you play the guitar," she says pitifully, watching Emma's resolve slowly crumble. Now she only has to wait until -.

"Fine," Emma says with an exaggerated sigh, caving in after only a second or two like Alyssa knew she would.

Alyssa's smile is smug as Emma shoves the last bite of the muffin into her mouth and gets up from the couch. She makes her way to the stage slowly and with one final grimace in Alyssa's direction, she's sitting down on the stool, adjusting the microphone a little before picking up the guitar from the stand.

Alyssa gives her a thumbs-up and an encouraging smile; Emma ignores what it does to her heart.

She strums a few chords before leaning slightly forward to speak on the microphone. "This song is called 'Alyssa is strong-arming me into playing again.' I hope y'all enjoy it."

The few customers scattered around the coffeehouse applaud weakly, but Emma doesn't hold it against them; it is three pm on a Sunday, after all.

Angie whistles from behind the counter, and Barry cheers her on.

"Alyssa," Emma sings in time with the melody she's probably just come up with, her voice slightly hoarse. It doesn't do anything to Alyssa. Not at all.

"No, it's not the Mona Lisa," the melody picks up slightly, "I couldn't think of any other rhyme, call the cops, that's my crime. I was going to say that your hair is soft, like a cloud, but the catchword is not allowed."

Alyssa bursts into genuine laughter at that. Head thrown back and all. Emma enjoys it a bit too much when she's the one making her laugh like that. She forgets what she had come up with for the next verse.

Chapter Text

"Guess what?" Nick asks, dropping down next to Kevin and Emma on the couch at the coffeehouse. He is almost vibrating with energy, a too-big smile on his face.

Instinctively, Kevin perks up, mirroring Nick’s smile. "What?"

"Melissa said yes." He jumps up a little on the couch cushions. "I proposed last night, and she said yes!"

Kevin’s whole face lightens up as he falls to the side to pull Nick into a hug. "Dude, nice!"

"Yeah, Nick. Congratulations." Emma leans a bit over Kevin to high-five Nick, a big smile on her face too. "Now pay up," she says, smirking at Kevin as she straightens up.

"Really?" Kevin scowls, turning from Nick to Emma. "You couldn’t have waited until we were home?"

"Nope."

Kevin grumbles something under his breath, but reluctantly he picks up a wrinkled twenty-dollar bill from his pocket and deposits it on Emma’s waiting hand.

"You were betting on whether I would propose or not?" Nick shakes his head, sounding a little annoyed. Kevin merely shrugs as Emma pockets her money.

"When," Emma says.

"What?"

"We were betting on when you were going to propose," she elaborates. Kevin nods.

"Yeah, and if you could have waited just another month, I’d have won."

Nick rolls his eyes, but then he is smiling again, apparently too happy to be bothered by their shenanigans. "I was going to wait, actually. I had a plan and everything, but then we were having dinner last night at her place and talking, and it was nice- you know? So I just asked her, and she said yes. She said yes!" He is so excited that it's kind of contagious.

"We're happy for you, Nick," Emma tells him sincerely. If it's possible, his smile widens even more as he looks at her over Kevin's head.

"Thanks, Em."

Kevin jumps up on the couch, clapping his hands together suddenly and startling them.

"You’re gonna be a married man. Dude!" And then he’s jumping on Nick and attacking his perfectly combed hair with both hands.

"No!"

Nick’s attempt to defend himself is more or less useless as Kevin somehow manages to make him disheveled.

Emma rolls her eyes, unlocking her phone to find something to pass the time as she pretends that she doesn’t know them.

One of them yelps in pain; Emma sighs.

 

"Not to be a party pooper," Emma says a while later when Nick and Kevin have mostly stopped behaving like children. "But have you told Kaylee yet?"

Nick’s face falls as he slumps back on the couch. "You two were the first ones to know, actually."

Kevin winces. "How do you think that she’ll react?"

Nick seems to think about it for a moment before he straightens up, putting on a defiant face. "It’s gonna be fine," he says almost confidently. "We broke up years ago, and we still managed to stay friends. Besides, she’s dating that guy too, the lawyer. Jack? James?"

"You know it’s Jake, and they broke up like, almost a month ago."

"Oh yeah," Kevin slaps his own forehead. "I knew I had forgotten to tell you something."

The bell at the door jingles before Nick can say anything; he pales a little when he looks over his shoulder at the entrance.

"Stop talking, now," he whisper-yells, hurriedly turning to look at Emma and Kevin with wide eyes. "They’re coming."

"Who is-" Emma doesn’t need to finish her question because the next second Alyssa is already pushing at her shoulders as she sits down next to Emma on the arm of the couch. Out of the corner of her eyes, she can see Kaylee and Shelby squeezing together in the armchair.

"What are you guys talking about?" Shelby asks, narrowing her eyes when she notices Emma and Nick exchange a look.

"Nothing," Nick says all too quickly at the same time Emma blurts out "the state of the country’s economy."

"But I thought we were talking about Nick’s wedding?" Kevin sounds genuinely confused as he asks it, turning from Emma to Nick then back again.

Emma covers her face with a hand. Nick punches Kevin on the arm.

"Hey, ouch."

"You’re getting married?" Kaylee asks, making everyone turn to her and hold their collective breath as they wait for what she’ll do next.

Nick clears his throat awkwardly. "Um, yes?" He looks at Kevin for moral support, but all he gets is a scowl. "I… erm, I proposed last night, and Melissa said yes." He smiles weakly. "So, yeah."

"Well," Kaylee says, nodding, "congratulations, Nick. I’m happy for you." Her smile looks mostly sincere, and everyone relaxes a little.

Shelby smirks as she wraps an arm around Kaylee protectively. "Yeah, Nick, we all know how much you like a wedding. Just make sure she’s not a lesbian this time."

Kaylee snickers while Kevin and Alyssa burst into laughter, and Emma rolls her eyes. She shifts a little on the couch, leaning into Alyssa and settling more comfortably against her side. "I have a question."

Nick straightens up, looking up at Emma, and ignoring everyone else. "Shoot."

"Do you get a fifty percent discount when you pay for your second wedding?" She asks it with a straight face. Nick narrows his eyes, slumping down again and crossing his arms.

Alyssa slaps her lightly. "Be nice," she says, but she’s also smiling, and Emma smirks proudly at herself.

"Har har har," Nick says unamused.

"I have a question too," Kevin says. "Do I get to be the best man this time? Because last time I couldn't, and-" His excited smile drops from his face when he turns sharply to look at Emma with wide eyes. "I’m sorry, Emma. I know I promised I’d be yours, but, like, Nick is getting married first. Again. And you know…" He trails off with a shrug.

Emma opens and closes her mouth a few times, trying to come up with an answer. "I… I never even asked you?" She says finally, but Kevin is not paying attention anymore, already back to Nick with another inane question.

"Hey." Alyssa nudges Emma with a shoulder. "I’m getting a coffee; do you want another one, too?"

Nick, Kevin, and Shelby are loudly discussing something, but Emma tunes them out, focusing on Alyssa instead. "Just some tea? It's past six already; I'm cutting myself off."

Alyssa snorts a laugh. "Look at you, turning to tea in your old age. You're becoming your grandmother already."

Emma doesn’t miss a beat. "She’s supposed to call me later tonight. I’ll tell her that you called her old." Alyssa narrows her eyes, but this time Emma catches her hand before she can slap her again.

"I didn’t say that!"

Emma shrugs, smiling sweetly at Alyssa and lacing their fingers together automatically. "You can buy my silence if you want. I accept lasagna as currency."

Alyssa huffs a small laugh. "You’re incorrigible. You know that?" Emma shrugs again, still smiling, and Alyssa rolls her eyes good-naturedly. "I think I have everything I need for a lasagna back at home, actually."

"Good."

"I’ll make one just for you when you finally convince Betsy to give me the secret recipe of her Hoosier pie."

Emma groans as Alyssa smiles lazily at her; if it makes butterflies suddenly appear on Emma’s stomach, that is nothing new.

 

It only takes Alyssa a couple of minutes to come back with their drinks. She passes Emma a mug before sitting down next to her once again and wrapping her free arm around Emma’s neck.

Emma looks around at her friends as she waits for her tea to cool down a bit. Nick is now nodding along as Kevin babbles on about his best man speech, while Kaylee and Shelby have a whispered conversation that involves a lot of hand gestures.

Life is kind of funny, Emma thinks. Years ago, back when she was still in high school, she had a grand total of zero friends. Sure, she had acquaintances; people she could ask for a pencil or pair up with when there were group projects. There were even some people in the band that she could sit with during lunch, but she never had any close friends.

She did have Betsy, though; the one person in the whole world she knew she could trust with anything, any secret. But she was her grandma, not someone close to Emma’s age, and as much as Emma loves her, it wasn’t the same thing.

Moving to New York for college, she had hoped it would be better than high school, she just didn’t anticipate how different it would be and how many people she would meet and how some of them could literally change her life.

They were all so different that it was sort of amazing how they ended up all together in one big group. It was nice, even if Emma didn’t understand how it happened. They were just a mismatched, strange little family that somehow made it work and she was glad for it.

 


 

Shelby and Alyssa’s apartment is dimly lit when Emma walks in without knocking, though she can hear the sound of the TV on as she makes a beeline to the fridge, so at least she knows someone is home.

"Hey, Alyssa?" Emma calls out, already looking through the fridge’s contents. "Do you have any eggs? Kevin thinks he can bake a cake, but we don’t have eggs. Or flour. Sugar, too."

"Flour’s in the pantry." Alyssa’s disembodied voice comes from somewhere in the living room, but all Emma sees when she looks in that direction is the back of the couch and the faint light of the TV. Emma waits for Alyssa to say something else, frowning when she doesn’t.

Alyssa is ungracefully sprawled over the couch when Emma finds her; she looks down at her for a moment before pulling on Alyssa’s legs to make space for herself to sit down too. "Alright, tell me what’s wrong."

Alyssa avoids Emma's eyes as she slowly pulls herself upright.

"Why do you think there's something wrong?"

"Well, for one, it’s only six and you’re drinking wine and crying as you rewatch Star Wars for the hundredth time"

Alyssa scoffs. "I’m not crying," she says with a sniff. "And I'll have you know that A New Hope is an incredible movie. A masterpiece, really."

"It is," Emma concedes with a smile. "But also, I just told you that Kevin wants to bake a cake, and you didn't even try to stop me. What am I to do when he inevitably sets our apartment on fire?" Emma smirks when she catches Alyssa rolling her eyes, though she quickly becomes serious again. "Really, tell me what's wrong?"

Alyssa sighs, shimmying on the couch until she’s close enough to rest her head on Emma’s shoulder. "I just had a bad day today, that’s all."

"Okay," Emma says, wrapping an arm around Alyssa and placing a kiss on the top of her head. "Tell me about it?"

"It’s stupid," Alyssa tries to shrug, dismissive, she’s still avoiding Emma’s eyes.

Emma pulls away just a little so she can look down at her, one of her eyebrows raised. "Might be, but if you don’t tell me, then how am I supposed to fix it?"

She catches it when Alyssa’s lips tug up slightly into a barely-there smile, and Emma grins to herself. "There you are," she says, playfully poking the dimple on Alyssa’s cheek with one finger. It makes her small smile turn into a real one, just like Emma knew it would.

Alyssa shakes her head, looking away as her smile drops after a moment. "It's nothing, really." She tries to brush it aside again, though she knows Emma is not letting this one go. "It's just something this guy at work said about me being too exhaustive or something like that." Absently, she lifts a hand to her own shoulder, finding Emma’s fingers there and holding onto them. "He said that maybe I needed to calm down and be less intense, and it got me thinking…"

Emma frowns. "What?"

"What if he's right? Is that why I only have five friends, and none of my relationships ever lasts?"

Slowly, Emma turns her hand on Alyssa's shoulder, gently lacing their fingers together.

"This guy wouldn't be the one that was fighting with you for the sous chef position, would he?" Emma asks, humming when she feels Alyssa nod against her shoulder and gently squeezing her fingers in what she hopes is a reassuring manner.

"Well, first of all, I need to remind you that you’re the one that broke up with your last girlfriend, not the other way around," Emma states. Alyssa opens her mouth to maybe refute it, but Emma keeps going before she can. "You broke up with her because the two of you wanted different things. You told me that, remember?"

"Yeah, but what about everything else? There's what he said today, and then, there's what my mom said the other day. What if they’re right? What if no one else falls in love with me because I always come off as too intense and-"

"That’s bullshit, and you know it," Emma cuts her off in a gentle yet firm voice. She doesn’t like it when Alyssa sounds like that, small and insecure.

"What if it’s not?" Alyssa asks defiantly.

Emma puffs her cheeks, thinking over the words she wants to say and how she wants to say them.

"This man child that takes time off his day to say things like this; have you considered that maybe he's just bitter that you got the position he wanted?" She pulls away again to catch Alyssa's eyes, daring her to argue. "There isn't a lot we can do about your mom for now, but if you really wanted to you should have a girlfriend, Alyssa. I mean, look at you!" Emma says, then scoffs, gesturing to Alyssa with her free hand. And really, it's unfair how good she manages to look lying on the couch in sweatpants with Cheetos dust all over her t-shirt. "Who wouldn't want you?"

Alyssa rolls her eyes, even if Emma's words manage to bring another small smile from her because deep down, she knows Emma means it.

"Worse comes to worst, I'll be your girlfriend."

Alyssa shakes her head, but Emma can see the way her lips are twitching, so she keeps going before she can stop herself.

"I don’t know about being too intense," she starts again, softly, her voice serious once more. "The Alyssa Greene I know is just someone passionate about the things she loves. She knows what she wants; she goes for it, and she gets it. Because she’s awesome like that. That’s not a character flaw, you know? And if anyone says otherwise, just point me in their direction so I can punch them in the face."

That makes Alyssa huff a small laugh; out of all of them, Emma has always been the one incapable of ever hurting a fly.

Emma rolls her eyes good-naturedly. "Fine, I would just have a few choice words with them. I could easily make them cry."

"Emma," Alyssa sighs.

"I’m not done yet." Emma raises an eyebrow expectantly; Alyssa knows better than trying to interrupt her this time. "You shouldn’t ever have to feel like you have to change anything about yourself to please anyone.

"Look at me," Emma says softly, using her free hand to lift Alyssa’s chin up until they’re looking at each other. "Alyssa, you’re incredible and one of my favorite people in the whole world. You are smart, funny, and the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met in real life. Any girl that isn’t in love with you is just in denial."

Alyssa stares into Emma's eye as she registers her words, and takes her time to really listen to what Emma is telling her.

She knows she's blushing, but that's not what is causing warmth to spread from her chest to the very tip of her fingers. Alyssa’s heart is beating a little too fast while everything else is suspended in time, and in that moment, the only thing that exists it's her and Emma and Emma's words.

"You truly think all that?" Alyssa asks in a whisper, leaning forward slightly without really meaning to.

"I do," Emma says just as softly yet in a way that leaves no room for Alyssa to doubt her.

She's still looking at Emma when she lets go of her hand. The truth is that as much as Alyssa always strived to be the best, she never really saw it as enough. Her whole life, her mother had constantly pressured her to seek a kind of unachievable greatness, but slowly, as she wraps both arms around Emma’s neck, she thinks that maybe it's okay to slow down and just breathe for a moment.

She is sure of it when Emma hugs her back just as tightly.

"Thanks, Em," Alyssa murmurs, burying her face on the curve of Emma’s neck.

"Anytime."

Alyssa’s smile is hidden on Emma’s skin. It's warm and safe where she is, inside Emma’s arms. It's the most comfortable Alyssa has felt all day, and she thinks that she would like to stay right there for a while.

So that’s how they stay. Emma is somehow entertained by the movie on the screen; she knows she likes to tease Alyssa for being a nerd, but so is she. And even if she weren’t, Emma can’t deny that Princess Leia is quite the badass. And very pretty to look at, too.

When the movie is over, and the credits are rolling, Emma gently shakes her shoulder until Alyssa rolls her head to look up at her.

“The movie is over. Are you crying now? Please don't cry, or I'll cry too, and we both know I'm an ugly crier."

That gets her a small chuckle like she knew it would.

“I'm happy that we're still friends, Em. I'm glad I didn't push you away."

“Me too.” Emma hums, feeling warm.

"C’mon, let's go out and get some ice cream. My treat."

"It always is your treat."

"Do you want to pay for it this time?"

"No."

"Then zip it."

 


 

The door to Alyssa’s apartment opens right as Emma is about to open it herself. The force of it is enough to push her to take a small step back to keep herself upright as, one by one, all of her friends walk out, grimacing and hastily shrugging on their coats.

Shelby is the first to spot Emma in the hallway, her face instantly lighting up. Emma is immediately suspicious.

"Emma!" She says with a bright smile, clapping her hands together as she looks to the others. "Look who’s here, guys. It's Emma!"

The wall is on the way when Emma tries to take another step back. There's nowhere else to run. Shelby is quick to close the space between them; invading Emma’s personal space and grabbing her by the shoulders before she can find another route to escape.

"We’re so glad you’re here, Emma," she says, sickly sweet in a way Emma knows it’s entirely fake.

"And why is that?" She asks dryly.

"Well, you see, Alyssa was just inviting us to go to that new bistro with her. You know the one?" She barrages on before Emma can answer, "but unfortunately, all of us already have plans." She pouts, but it quickly turns into a predatory smile. "But now that you’re here, you can go with her, right, Em?"

Emma looks away from Shelby to find Alyssa standing in the doorway to her apartment, gazing pleadingly at Emma. Her eyes wander over to the rest of their friends crowding the hallway and nodding enthusiastically to Shelby’s words.

She crosses her arm defensively. Emma knows this is a trap because she knows her friends, and she's skeptical that there isn't more to it that none of them is warning her about.

"And where are you all going?" She asks, trying to avoid the inevitable or maybe to just give herself some time to think about how to run, too.

"Date night with Melissa," Nick says at once while Shelby says "the movies," and Kevin says "the zoo."

Emma narrows her eyes as Kaylee forces a laugh.

"Yeah, Nick has a date; Shelby and I are catching a movie and..." She trails off, looking at Shelby for support who only nods her head. "Kevin is going to find a zoo that is still open at this time?" Her eyes light up then. "That’s it! You know how Kevin is."

"Right," Emma scoffs.

Kaylee raises an eyebrow, daring Emma to question her story. Emma rolls her eyes but doesn't say anything else.

"Right. We’re gonna go… do that, now," Shelby says, grabbing one of Kaylee’s hands on her own. "You’ll go with Alyssa, right?"

Emma looks back to Alyssa who is now staring at her with imploring eyes and suppresses a sigh. It’s never easy to say no to Alyssa, but it’s downright impossible to even consider it when she’s looking at Emma like that.

Even if Emma doesn’t know what the catch is yet.

"I guess I could go?" She says to Alyssa, sounding as uncertain as she feels. When she turns back to the others, Shelby gives her a thumbs-up and a beaming smile.

"Great!" Kaylee says, already pulling Shelby in the direction of the stairs by their joined hands. "You go do that, and we’ll leave. Good luck. Bye!"

Nick hurriedly follows them.

"Yeah. Good luck, dude," Kevin throws over his shoulder with a grimace before he, too, disappears down the stairs.

"You already said yes; you can back off now." Alyssa's puppy eyes are gone already. Instead, she looks at Emma with a faux innocent smile that is just a bit impish.

"Uh… why would I want to back off?" Emma asks, looking furtively in the direction of the stairs and wondering if really it’s too late to run away.

"They may have forgotten to mention that we’re having dinner with my mom?" Alyssa says it slowly, grabbing one of Emma’s hands and immediately trying to tug her inside the apartment.

Emma groans but doesn’t budge. "Very nice of you guys to warn me!" She yells in the direction of the stairs. It's fine; the neighbors are used to their antics by now.

Shelby’s distinctive laughter coming from somewhere downstairs is the only answer she gets.

Emma draws in a deep breath, closing her eyes for a moment before grudgingly allowing herself to be pulled inside.

"It’s gonna be fine," Alyssa says in what is supposed to be a reassuring voice.

Emma is not reassured; meeting Veronica Greene is always an anxiety-inducing event that she's absolutely not prepared for.

"We can just tell her we’re getting married. That will surely shock her into silence," Alyssa jokes, but instead of laughing Emma’s frown deepens- even if the words send a pleasant shock down her spine.

"Or maybe she’ll just murder me on the spot."

"Well," Alyssa pauses, turning to Emma and fixing the collar of her shirt with her free hand, the other one still firmly holding onto Emma's. "There’s always that possibility, too."

Emma grumbles something inaudible under her breath, and Alyssa relaxes slightly. She's not looking forward to spending a whole night hearing her mom tell her everything that's wrong with her life, but she knows having Emma there will make it just a little more bearable.

She knows her relationship with her mother still needs working, but it's leagues better than it used to be when she was still in school, and she knows that even with all the nagging she does, her mom is trying and that matters too.

By the end of the night, she'll maybe even be happy that she's seen her mom. So will Emma.

Probably.

"Do you think she's going to be nice to me if I say I'm paying?"

Alyssa tilts her head, thinking about it for a second. "Eh, you could always try."

 


 

“…you believed in me before when I didn't deserve it, and every day you choose to keep on believing in me. That’s all I could ever ask. I want you to know that I know that I'm the luckiest man in the world, and I give you my word that every day I'll be better for you.

"I don’t take any moment I get to spend with you for granted, Melissa. And I promise I’ll be there as long as you’ll have me. I can’t wait to begin the rest of our lives together.”

Melissa is staring at Nick with tears in her eyes when he finishes his speech. The whole time, his eyes had been on her as if they were only the two people in this room.

Kevin looks like he’s tearing up too where he’s standing a little off to the side next to Nick, though it doesn’t take too long until one of Melissa’s friends is there hugging him in support. Emma rolls her eyes.

It's only after they have exchanged their wedding bands that Emma allows herself to scan the room for the rest of their friends. It's not hard to find where Kaylee and Shelby are; their hands are clasped together, while Shelby has one arm protectively over Kaylee's shoulders. Kaylee's smile is sincere, and Emma's own smile widens too.

If she were being honest, Emma had been a little scared that this evening would turn into a disaster. But as they all slowly migrate to the reception venue, and Melissa's dad stands up to say a few words, Emma is oddly proud of her friends.

Nick and Kaylee had such a long, complicated story together; it still amazes her how they managed to stay friends despite how their own relationship fell through.

“I loved Nick's speech,” Alyssa whispers as she stops next to Emma, pulling her from her thoughts. “It was so beautiful; I didn’t know he had it in him.”

Emma hums, wrapping an arm around Alyssa. “Is it odd that I’m proud of him?”

Alyssa leans on Emma, trusting she’ll keep her hold on her. “Weirdly, so am I.”

“They grow up so fast,” Emma says, sniffing exaggeratedly. It makes Alyssa chuckle, though she quickly tries to cover it up with a cough when a few people closer to them glare at her; Melissa’s dad is still speaking.

 

 

Alyssa leans her shoulder against the wall on the hotel hallway, watching with a lazy smile as Emma searches for the keys to her room.

Shelby and Kaylee had been one of the firsts to disappear when the party started to dwindle down. Alyssa had texted them before she and Emma left the reception, too, and was reassured they were safe and sound in their own hotel room. Kevin and Melissa's friend, whom she didn't know the name of - one of the bridesmaids - were seen taking the elevator together.

Knowing him, Alyssa hadn't been too worried about his whereabouts. Worse came to worst, Emma could always track his phone.

“I don’t think I had this much fun in a while,” Alyssa says with a grin. Watching as Emma finally unlocks the door, following her inside even if her own room was right next door. “I’m happy for Nick.”

Emma nods her agreement, smiling too as she abandons her suit jacket on a chair, loosens her tie, and immediately falls down on the bed with a dramatic grunt. “He's come a long way.”

“I think we were a good influence on him.” Alyssa kicks off her high heels as she grabs a bottle of water from the minibar before making her way to the bed and sitting down much more gracefully next to Emma.

Emma snorts a laugh. “Now that’s a funny thought.”

“Can you believe that, out of all of us, Nick is the first one to get married?” Alyssa asks after a moment, looking pensive.

Emma looks up, sitting up with a sigh and playfully knocking her shoulder against Alyssa’s. “To be fair, this is the guy’s second wedding, and he’s only twenty-five. Maybe he is trying to break some kind of record or something.”

Alyssa giggles at the joke. Emma watches her face with a fond smile.

"I don't know; I have a good feeling about this one."

Alyssa lets out a sigh as she looks back at Emma with a dreamy smile. “I think I wanna get married too.”

Emma raises an eyebrow. "You're Alyssa Greene, if you really want to, I'm pretty sure there's a line of girls just out of the door waiting to get down on one knee and propose to you."

Alyssa shakes her head with a small smile, though there's a look on her face that Emma can't really figure out.

"You have to stop saying stuff like that."

"Why would I do that when it's the truth? Alyssa, I'm pretty sure you could get any girl you want with just a snap of your fingers..."

She trails off, mesmerized, as Alyssa slowly leans closer until there's almost no space between their faces.

"What are you doing?" Emma asks in a whisper. She thinks Alyssa's eyes may have flickered down to her lips for a moment there, but she's sure that she'd imagined it. This is Alyssa, there's no way that-

And then Alyssa’s lips are on hers and Emma forgets how to think, forgets everything until all she can focus on is how Alyssa tastes.

Emma’s eyes close of their own accord as one of Alyssa’s hands touch her cheek, and instinctively, she kisses her back.

Alyssa sighs in the kiss, her lips soft and tasting like chocolate cake and champagne, and it takes a few seconds until Emma’s brain finally kickstarts back again.

Suddenly, she's aware of who exactly she is kissing, and why that's such a bad idea.

Alyssa.

Her best friend Alyssa.

Emma’s eyes shoot open as she breaks the kiss abruptly, one hand on Alyssa’s chest pushing herself back to set some distance between them.

“Did- did you just kiss me?” She stammers after a few seconds of the two of them staring wide-eyed at one another.

Alyssa nods slowly, her eyes fixed on Emma’s lips. They’re still too close.

Emma blinks. “Um, just how drunk are you?”

“Not too drunk that I don’t know what I’m doing,” Alyssa says with a shrug. Her eyes are earnest when they find Emma’s. “Honestly, I barely had anything to drink.”

Emma frowns. “Then why did you do it?”

“Because," Alyssa shrugs noncommittally, chewing on her bottom lip as she looks away, then back at Emma. "You keep saying those things, and your lips looked soft, and I wanted to!” She makes it sound so simple. Maybe it is.

Before Emma can figure out what to say, Alyssa is already grabbing the hand still on her chest and lacing their fingers together as she leans closer again. Emma doesn’t try to stop her this time.

“Are you drunk?” Alyssa asks when they're nose to nose again.

Emma shakes her head.

Alyssa smiles. “Can I kiss you again?”

It takes a second for Emma to register what Alyssa is asking. A small part of her thinks that maybe this isn’t such a great idea, but before she can dwell on that thought, she’s already burying her free hand on Alyssa’s hair and pulling her into a kiss this time.

Alyssa’s hand comes up to hold onto Emma’s cheek. Her lips are warm and just as soft as the first time, and Alyssa can’t help but want more.

For a brief moment, it crosses her mind that maybe kissing her best friend shouldn’t feel this right, but then Emma changes the angle to kiss her harder, and her mind becomes blissfully blank.

Emma whines at the loss when Alyssa pulls back; they’re both a little breathless, but Alyssa wastes no time as she tilts her head to kiss down Emma’s neck. She bites down softly on Emma’s pulse point before sucking hard on the same spot until Emma is a whimpering mess.

Emma’s free hand grips tightly on Alyssa’s waist. It makes her feel lightheaded as she presses down open-mouthed kisses and small bites on every bit of skin she can find until she meets the collar of her shirt.

Suddenly, the hand that was on her hair just a second ago is on Alyssa’s knee, slowly bunching up her dress, though Emma stops when her hand is high on the back of Alyssa’s thigh.

"Are we- are we really doing this?" Emma sounds breathless as she stares at Alyssa with wide dark eyes, and Alyssa pulls away from her neck to suck on Emma's bottom lip instead.

“Do you want to stop?” She asks after a beat, her lips still on Emma’s, barely pulling away to look down at her.

“Fuck,” Emma says, panting. Her hand leaves Alyssa’s waist to push on her shoulder until they are both falling backward on the bed. Emma easily finding herself on top of her in one fluid motion.

Her thigh finds its way between Alyssa’s, and she presses down purposefully. Alyssa screws her eyes shut, arching her back as a desperate whimper leaves her lips.

One of Emma’s hands is on the mattress, holding her weight above Alyssa. The other one trails down her thigh, hooking it under Alyssa’s knee until it's wrapped around her waist.

Alyssa fists one hand on the short hairs at the back of Emma’s neck, dragging her into another hard kiss.

“Don’t stop,” she pants against Emma’s lips when she rolls her hips down and presses against Alyssa just right.

"Okay," Emma says, peppering open-mouthed kisses down the column of Alyssa's neck.

 

 

“Fuck,” Alyssa whispers to no one in particular as she stares at the ceiling of the hotel room and waits for her breath to calm down a little. She can hear Emma breathing just as hard next to her.

“Yeah. Holy shit," Emma agrees.

Alyssa turns to look at her just in time to watch Emma biting down on her bottom lip. She resists the urge to go and bite it herself.

It's quiet for a few moments until Emma breaks it.

“Never done that with you before,” she quips almost awkwardly; it's endearing.

“Nope.”

Alyssa’s eyes wander back up to the ceiling so she can avoid looking at Emma and picturing her very naked body under the covers.

Emma's soft and pliant body.

Emma's soft, pliant, and naked body that was just touching Alyssa's body, and she shakes her head. She needs at least a few minutes to recover, after all.

Alyssa tries to use the time to make her breath slow down instead.

“Now I know why your ex stalked you after you broke up with her,” Alyssa says amusedly after a while when she finally feels like she can talk again.

“Huh?”

“I would, too. Now that I know what you can do with your-”

“Let’s not talk about my crazy ex right now,” Emma says high pitched, the tips of her ears reddening.

What a dork.

Alyssa squashes down the part of herself that thinks she looks cute like this, blushing because of something Alyssa has said, hair tousled, lips shining with the remnants of Alyssa's lipstick.

But she just had sex with Emma – surprisingly amazing sex – Alyssa can admit that she’s hot.

When Alyssa rolls on her side to face her, Emma is already staring back at her. The look on her face makes Alyssa smirk as her thoughts are pulled in another direction.

“What would you like to talk about then?” Alyssa asks, trying to look innocent as if she didn't have a hand on Emma’s thigh, squeezing it suggestively.

“You know what,” Emma chokes out, “let’s not talk about anything.”

Alyssa hums. “Best idea you had all day.”

Emma can't help but agree.

 


 

Alyssa walks into Emma’s apartment slowly, feigning surprise when she sees her there. Emma is sitting right at the counter, hunched over and staring at the apple she's cradling in her hands as if it could tell her all the secrets of the universe.

“Oh, hey, Emma. I didn’t know you were here.” Alyssa says, which is a lie. She had just bumped into Kevin in the hall, who had told her that Emma was home not even 2.4 seconds ago.

“I… live here?” Emma looks up at Alyssa for a second before quickly shifting her gaze back to the apple.

Alyssa nods. “Yeah. I know that. It’s just that Kevin said you were out…” She trails off when Emma still doesn't look at her.

“Why would he say that?” Emma frowns. “He just saw me.”

Alyssa forces a laugh, shrugging awkwardly and quickly changing the subject. "You know how Kevin is. Anyway, I, um, I just needed to borrow some sugar." She points to the fridge for some reason, but it's not like Emma notices it because she's still not looking in her direction.

Between Kevin barging into Emma’s room while Alyssa was - luckily - in the bathroom, then the trip back home surrounded by all their friends, Emma and Alyssa didn’t exactly have a chance to talk about what had happened between them.

Distractedly, Alyssa pulls the door to the fridge open, looking through all the pizza boxes and leftover Chinese food. Sometimes, Alyssa wonders how Emma and Kevin survive like this. Then she remembers how often they stay for dinner with her and Shelby, and she’s reassured that at least they will eat some vegetables every once in a while.

Emma clears her throat after a few moments of awkward silence. “So, erm, how are you?” She chances a look at Alyssa, then immediately takes her glasses off, trying to clean them with the hem of her t-shirt.

The movement pulls the fabric down slightly, and Alyssa catches sight of a hickey on Emma’s collarbone. She’s the one averting her eyes this time. “I’m fine. Good. I’m good, yeah.” A beat. “How are- how have you been?”

Emma looks uncertain. “I’m good, too?”

Alyssa nods a few times in quick succession until she catches on to what she’s doing and stops. “Cool cool cool.”

There’s another moment of awkward silence when neither of them speaks nor look at each other, and Alyssa considers running out the door.

Maybe Emma won’t notice. It's not like she's looking at Alyssa anyway.

She turns her back to Emma and reaches for the doorknob, then immediately turns back around.

“We should probably talk about what happened, right?” She asks, before she can lose her nerve.

Emma nods. “Yeah, um, we should totally do that.” She stares at Alyssa. “What did you want to talk about exactly?”

Emma.”

“Right!” Emma sits up, abandoning her apple and waving awkwardly with one arm. “You want to talk about the fact that we had sex. That makes sense! Because, you know, I thought that maybe you wanted to talk about the reception. It was a nice reception, right? I thought it was lovely and… Maybe I should stop talking now.”

Alyssa can't help the small smile on her lips as she grows more at ease the more Emma is, well, Emma. She takes a step closer to the counter and lowers her voice even though she knows they’re alone. “How could we have let that happen?”

Seven times,” Emma says wide-eyed. Alyssa resists the urge to slap her.

Alyssa forces a laugh. “It was stupid, right?”

Emma nods. “Totally crazy stupid.”

“Totally crazy stupid surprisingly good sex.”

“I mean,” Emma clears her throat. “It was good.”

Alyssa's eyes flicker down to Emma’s lips before she can stop herself. “But we probably shouldn’t do that anymore." She waits for a beat. "Right?”

“Totally. Yes.” Emma nods twice, then shakes her head. “I meant no, as in we really shouldn’t.”

“’Cause, we’re friends. We’ve known each other since we were like, nineteen. We've been friends for six years. We wouldn't want to ruin that if this goes wrong, right?”

Emma nods again. “Right. We wouldn’t want to ruin that.”

“Absolutely not,” Alyssa shakes her head, though her eyes are already on Emma’s lips again as she leans over the counter. “But like, would it be so bad if we wanted to… again? Just one last time.”

Emma stands up. “Just one last time.”

Alyssa’s eyes lock on Emma’s as she finally steps around the counter until there’s barely any space between them. “And tomorrow we can forget this happened and go back to being just friends, and forget we know what the other looks like naked.”

“I like how you think.” Emma nods, her hands twitching on her sides as she stops herself from reaching for Alyssa.

There’s a moment when neither of them does anything, and then the next second Emma is being backed against the counter, Alyssa’s hand grasping her hips as she kisses her thoroughly.

Emma’s hands quickly find the hem of Alyssa’s top and slip under the fabric. One hand going to the small of her back to pull her closer while the other is already feeling up Alyssa.

“Bedroom,” Emma mumbles on Alyssa’s lips.

Alyssa hums, grabbing Emma’s wrist to pull it from under her shirt and tug her in the direction of Emma’s room.

 

So, maybe that wasn’t the last time.

Chapter Text

“Today sucks,” Emma announces loudly as soon as she opens the door to Alyssa and Shelby’s apartment and kicks off her shoes.

“Oh, look who is here. It’s Emma. Again,” Shelby says from somewhere on the couch, not even bothering to look up from her phone.

Alyssa looks up with a smile, closing the laptop she was working on and watching Emma sit down next to her at the table. This was routine by now, Emma stopping at their place first to complain about work before crossing the hall to go to her own place.

“Hey, Em,” she says lightly.

Emma doesn’t reply though, instead, she picks one of the magazines scattered over the table, folds it in half, and promptly bangs it against her forehead a couple of times until Alyssa manages to push her arm away before the magazine can make contact again.

“Stop it.”

Emma mumbles something under her breath that Alyssa can't hear, but puts the magazine down anyway, unfolding it and with a scowl.

“What’s wrong?” Alyssa asks, moving closer, her hand still on Emma’s arm and her thumb rubbing soothing circles on her skin.

"I got a promotion today," Emma sounds as miserable as someone who has just lost their job. Alyssa stops her hand movement for a moment to stare down at Emma in confusion.

Emma is still glaring down at the magazine she has abandoned on the table, looking as if it has personally offended her.

“Uh, and that is bad?”

Emma looks at her, not realizing Alyssa is sitting much closer than she thought and staggering a little when she finds they're almost nose to nose. She looks back down at the tabletop, cheeks red.

“I- the promotion is quite good, actually,” Emma clears her throat, still not sounding enthusiastic at all. "I'll have more responsibilities, of course, but I also get a raise and-"

"What do you need more money for? Aren't you rich or something?" Shelby cuts her off, dropping her phone on the couch and getting up to make her way over to the kitchen area, ungracefully falling down on the chair opposite Emma.

Emma sighs heavily, “I’m not rich, I’m-”

“Yada yada yada,” Shelby pretends to yawn. "We've all heard it before."

This was a semi-regular argument between them, and Alyssa rolls her eyes. Anything had the potential to become a debate between Emma and Shelby; she was still waiting for the day to come when they wouldn’t squabble over every. single. thing.

But then how would they show love and affection for each other?

Emma glares at Shelby. “Don’t you have anywhere else to be? Far away from here, preferably.”

"Stop it, you two," Alyssa intervenes before Shelby can reply, or it really would become impossible to stop them.

They could go like this for hours if no one stopped them and as entertaining as it was to watch the two of them bicker like an old married couple, Alyssa was hoping they would finish with the other subject first.

"I still don't understand what's wrong, Em," she says honestly. She knows Emma doesn't really like her job, but this seems something more than that.

Emma glares harder at the magazines on the table. “We had this huge meeting today, right? And everyone who's someone was there, which was kind of cool up until the point where my boss kept calling me Amy Logan, and everyone that knew me kept staring, but I didn't know what to do. So, I didn’t do anything.”

"Oh no," Alyssa really tries to sound sympathetic, but then Shelby snorts, and she can't help but laugh too.

“Shut up,” Emma slumps back on the chair and looks up at the ceiling. “It’s not funny,” she mumbles. Maybe she’s pouting, but just a little.

"It's a little funny," Alyssa says and Emma's glare is redirected at her. "I'm sorry, I'm stopping." She's still laughing. Emma crosses her arms. "Okay, okay." Alyssa takes a deep breath and tries to look serious. Her smile is still a bit too big, though; it unintentionally disarms Emma. "You didn't correct her? Again. Why?"

Emma uncrosses her arms and sits up a little. "Because."

“Emma’s an idiot,” Shelby says as she pats Emma's shoulder a couple of times and looks at her with mock sympathy before Emma scowls and shrugs her hand away. “But also, because her boss is hot and Emma doesn’t know how to talk to people she finds attractive.”

Emma doesn’t correct her. "You don't understand," Emma says while Shelby pokes her tongue at her. "I waited the whole day for the right moment to say something, but then everyone was already leaving when I finally got the chance to talk to her. And she's so intimidating that I got scared that if I said something, she'd think I was stupid."

"She wouldn't be wrong," Shelby points out. She keeps going before Emma can come up with a retort. "You could always change your name."

“Huh,” Emma says, looking as if she was really considering the idea.

“You’re not changing your name, Emma,” Alyssa says with a sigh.

Emma frowns. “Why not?”

Alyssa opens her mouth to try and explain why that is a dumb idea when Kevin pushes the door open and saves her. Though he is closely followed by the chick and the duck. She resists the urge to sigh or slap her own forehead with the magazine Emma was using before.

The chick and the duck were the newest addition to Emma and Kevin's weird little family. They had accidentally adopted the pets a couple of weeks ago in an incredible idiotic sequence of events that no one still quite managed to understand.

But as much as Alyssa thought they were sort of cute – even more so when she caught Emma and Kevin acting like proud co-parents to them – she really wasn’t a big fan of the number of feathers she ended up finding in her own apartment all the time now.

“Hey, Kev,” Shelby says brightly.

“Shelbs,” he winks at her with a goofy smile before averting his eyes to Emma and putting a fist up for Emma to bump. “Way to go with that promotion, dude!” He’s grinning so much that Emma doesn’t have the heart to leave him hanging, so she only half heartedly bumps her fist to his.

She had been texting him earlier when she got the news, and he had been the first person she had told. “Thanks, I-”

Whatever she’s about to say is cut off as she almost falls from the chair when Shelby lets out a loud screech that startles the three of them.

“What the-”

"Stop that, or I'm gonna sell you to KFC!" Shelby says sternly, looking down at something on the floor, and Kevin gasps out loud as Emma hurriedly gets up to see what's going on.

She watches as Shelby uselessly struggles to put her feet up on the chair while the chick hops up and down and valiantly tries to peck her toes. Emma snorts at the scene before bending down to pick the chick up before Shelby has the chance to yell any more threats.

"Don't listen to her. She's a meanie," Emma says, cooing at the chick as she cradles it protectively on her arms.

Alyssa tries to disguise her laughter behind a fake cough, while Kevin stares at Shelby in horror. She looks vaguely offended by Emma’s insult.

“You can’t say things like that. You’ll traumatize her,” Kevin says to Shelby, looking over the chick as if to check that her words hadn’t inadvertently caused it any harm. Shelby rolls her eyes.

“Who’s traumatized?” Nick asks when he walks in, having caught only that part of the conversation. Kaylee follows in right behind him.

"Do you ever notice how no one knocks anymore?" Alyssa asks no one in particular.

Kaylee simply shrugs as she takes her coat off before sitting down next to Shelby and wrapping an arm around her shoulders. “Why would we knock?”

"I don't know? Because it's polite?" Emma quips as she walks over to the door and opens it again, calling for the duck to follow her.

Shelby scoffs. “You’re one to talk. When have you ever knocked?”

Nick and Kaylee snickers, but Alyssa winks at Emma when she catches her eyes.

“Alyssa, please inform your friends that I don’t have to knock. I would do it myself, but I need to take the kids back home before auntie Shelby decides to give them a poisoned apple or something equally evil." And with that, she's gone. The chick securely under one arm as the duck follows behind dutifully.

Alyssa simply shrugs when Shelby turns to her with a raised eyebrow, but then Kaylee is already talking to her in a low voice, and she becomes distracted. Nick is showing something on his phone to Kevin, and so, no one really pays attention when Alyssa leaves with the weak excuse that she “should check in on the chick, too.”

Emma doesn’t look up when the door to her apartment opens. “They're okay Kev. I don’t think the Chick-“

"Shut up about the chicken, Emma," Alyssa says, quickly looking over her shoulder to make sure no one followed her. When she is certain that the door is also locked, she grabs Emma by the hand, pulling her in the general direction of her bedroom. "I want to properly congratulate you on your promotion."

“Congratula- oh, right yeah." Emma almost trips on her own feet as she tries to walk faster.

 


 

“God, I’m never drinking again,” Shelby groans as she sinks down on the couch, her head automatically coming to rest on Kaylee’s shoulder.

Kaylee doesn’t miss a beat before she’s wrapping an arm around Shelby, running her fingers up and down her arm, and slowly nodding her agreement. “I regret all of my life choices.”

Shelby looks at Emma and Alyssa snuggled together on the armchair. Emma has her face buried on Alyssa's neck, her eyes closed, and one arm draped over Alyssa’s waist. “How come the two of you are so hungover too? Didn’t you leave, like, before midnight?”

Alyssa opens one eye to look at her, but she doesn’t bother coming up with an answer, just shrugs one shoulder before closing her eyes again.

“Alyssa opened a bottle of champagne,” Emma lifts her head just enough so she's not mumbling the words and then promptly drops it back down, nuzzling on Alyssa’s neck.

“Emma!” Alyssa scolds.

“But I thought you left because Alyssa had a headache?” Kevin chimes in, not opening his eyes, he looks as if he’s about to fall asleep on the carpet where he laid down and refused to get up.

Shelby shifts so she’s leaning more comfortably against Kaylee’s side, though she’s still staring at Emma and Alyssa. “So, you just, what? Came here and drank a whole bottle of champagne by yourselves?”

Alyssa turns on her side as much as she can with Emma lying half on top of her and ignoring her displeased grunt when her face is dislodged from Alyssa’s neck. "It was good champagne, and by the time we got home, I was feeling better. So, yeah."

“Right. Just the two of you?”

“No, the pope was here too,” Emma quips, opening her eyes just to glare at Shelby.

“We just watched some movies,” Alyssa says before Shelby can retort.

"You left the bar, where we went specifically to celebrate the promotion Emma got, and just came home to drink champagne and watch movies together?"

Alyssa opens her mouth to say something, but Emma beats her to it. "Shelby, please, why do you have to ask so many questions? Shhh. Let’s all just take a nap.”

Shelby rolls her eyes, huffing a breath in annoyance. Kaylee pats her on the arm a couple of times to appease her.

“I want coffee,” Kaylee says, not even a minute later, looking down at Kevin snoring on the floor and frowning. “And I also want someone to smother Kevin down with a pillow.”

Shelby hums but doesn’t move.

"Shel," Kaylee says softly, poking her with a finger. "I said, I want coffee."

“Yes, I heard you the first time.”

“So. Are you gonna go get it for me?”

“But I don’t wanna move,” Shelby whines.

“I want a coffee, too.” Alyssa mumbles, cuddling closer to Emma if it were possible.

"Seriously," Shelby says, her eyes narrowing as she watches the two of them. "Why are you so tired?"

“Seriously,” Emma parrots. “Stop asking dumb questions and go pick some coffee for us.”

“Now I’m not going just because you called me dumb.”

“Oh god,” Alyssa mumbles under her breath. “Here we go.”

Shelby sits up a little, glaring at Emma. “Besides, who’s dumber? Me or the person who still hasn’t corrected their boss even though she’s been calling them by the wrong name every day?”

Kaylee snorts a laugh. “I had forgotten about that.”

Emma pouts. “Shut up.”

Alyssa sighs, patting Emma’s hand on her stomach.

“You still haven’t corrected her?” Kaylee asks. “Why?”

Emma sighs. “Because.”

“Emma’s an idiot,” Shelby says with a sigh. "I keep saying that. Why does nobody else see it, too?”

Alyssa opens her mouth, perhaps to try and come up with something that will make them stop arguing, but decides against it. If they end up killing each other, at least it'll be quiet afterwards.

Luckily she hears the front door opening and looks up to find Nick casually walking in. He looks too put together, and she suddenly remembers that he was actually the first one to leave the bar last night.

He is holding a paper bag with the coffeehouse logo in his mouth, plus six cups on a drink carrier that he’s carefully trying to balance with both hands while struggling to close the door.

Shelby stares at him over her shoulder, her eyes wide. “How did you know? You don’t have to answer that. Nick, I love you so much right now.”

Nick abandons the paper bag on the table, chuckling as he walks over and passes a coffee cup to her when he is close enough.

"I'm awesome, right?" He hands one cup to Kaylee, too, before nudging Kevin with one foot, and carefully stepping over him when he doesn't wake up. "Also, Kaylee texted me earlier, and like the nice person I am, I bought coffee for everyone.” He winks at Shelby. “Including one to an Amy Logan, whoever that may be.”

Emma groans but still accepts the cup he’s offering her.

 


 

It’s still early in the morning when Shelby takes the seat in front of Alyssa at the table, she's bleary-eyed while Alyssa looks as if she's been awake for hours already. She starts feeling more like herself as she sips from the mug of coffee Alyssa had already poured for her when she saw her leaving her bedroom.

Her eyes slowly fix over Alyssa when she puts the mug down, crossing her hands on top of the table.

“What?” Alyssa asks after a moment when Shelby still hasn’t said anything.

“I’m not dumb, you know?”

Alyssa frowns. “Yes?”

Shelby hums, picking her mug again to take another sip. “So, do you have anything to tell me?”

“I don’t think so? What are you talking about?”

The piercing way Shelby is looking at Alyssa makes her want to squirm. It's a special talent she has, this piercing glare that makes Alyssa feel as if she's fifteen again and lying through her teeth to her mom.

She's still lost on what Shelby is going on about.

“I know you’re seeing someone.”

Alyssa’s thoughts screech to a halt, and she forces a laugh to cover up the surprise on her face. “W-what? I’m not- I’m not seeing anyone.” She scoffs, somehow managing to sound entirely unconvincing. “Where did you even get that idea?”

Huh, she used to be a better liar.

She and Emma hadn't really discussed anything about keeping this new, erm, development of their friendship a secret from the others; it just happened automatically. Besides, how would they even go about telling something like this to their friends?

Hey guys, just so you all know, Emma and I have been having sex for a while now, haha, but we're not dating or anything. We're just…

Her thoughts trail off at that. What are they doing anyway?

See, this is not the kind of thing she can just casually bring up in a conversation.

Shelby narrows her eyes, nodding as she leans back on her chair. “I just can’t figure out why you’re keeping it a secret. Or why you wouldn’t at least tell me.” She puts a hand up to stop Alyssa’s protests. “You do realize that we live in the same house and that when I hear you coming home at six in the morning for the third time in so many days, I’ll know you’re doing the walk of shame, right?”

She raises an eyebrow, waiting for Alyssa to say something. She doesn’t.

“Right. So, this is also a good time to tell you that you did an awful job of covering this hickey on your collarbone then. I’m still wondering why you didn’t just put on a shirt that covered it.”

Alyssa can feel her face flushing as one of her hands shoots up to cover the spot Shelby is talking about, cursing Emma in her head.

“Fine,” Alyssa says with a sigh after a moment, accepting that there was no way around it. “I’m not seeing anyone, we're just, um. It’s nothing serious.” She shrugs.

“Good for you,” Shelby smiles proudly at Alyssa, looking a little smug. “You really needed to unwind a little.”

“Are you saying I’m uptight?”

“Your words, not mine. But I actually meant it like you haven’t really put yourself out there lately, so this is good.” Shelby’s smile softens. “Tell me about her?”

Alyssa furrows her brow in confusion. “Who?”

Shelby rolls her eyes. “Your lover,” she says dryly.

“Right,” Alyssa says, faking a smile. There is no way she could describe Emma to Shelby and not expect her to put two and two together. And if she couldn’t talk about Emma, then what would she talk about?

Shelby raises an eyebrow expectantly.

“She has a really nice ass?” Alyssa says after a few seconds of racking her brain.

“That’s it?” Shelby asks, sounding entirely unimpressed.

Alyssa chews on her bottom lip. Shelby’s gaze on her face doesn’t waver. “You know what?” Alyssa straightens on her chair, smirking. “It’s the best sex I’ve ever had.”

“Really?” Shelby grins, leaning forward a little, her coffee forgotten.

“Yes, really,” Alyssa says with an indecent smile. “Shelbs, you have no idea. She's so attentive, you know? And she always seems to know exactly what I want, but she still asks anyway, and that's so nice and hot at the same time." Alyssa's smile is a bit dreamy and Shelby arches an eyebrow. "And then the way she touches me just makes me go crazy." She sighs, her eyes glazing over. "She also does this thing with her-”

Shelby lets out a squeaking noise, dramatically scrambling to cover her ears. “Whoa! Stop! Too much information!”

Alyssa stares at her, her face turning impassive as she waits for Shelby to put her hands down. "You're the one that was prying, now you don't want to know?"

“I wanted to know about this girl you’re dating, not the explicit details of your lesbian sex life.”

“First, we’re not dating. Second, that’s really homophobic of you.”

Shelby looks at Alyssa with mock-offense, a hand on her chest theatrically. "How dare you? Some of my best friends are homosexuals." She says dryly.

Alyssa flicks a piece of toast at her.

“So, do you like her?” Shelby asks more seriously now, brushing crumbs from her blouse before picking her mug back again and taking a sip.

“Wha- huh?” Alyssa sputters. “Do I like Em- her? No. I don- I don’t like her. I mean, of course I like her, but not like like her." Alyssa scoffs. "I told you, it’s just sex.”

Shelby nods thoughtfully before standing up and grabbing her purse. “They all say that.” A pause. “At first.”

Alyssa just stares dumbly. “Who?”

But then Shelby is already making her way to the door, throwing a see you later over her shoulder, before she's gone. Alyssa is left alone to wonder just what the hell Shelby had been talking about.

 


 

The sound of keys jingling is what pulls Emma's mind out of the haze she was in. With a start, she takes her hand out from Alyssa's pants, not so lightly pushing her away and fumbling to redo the buttons on her own shirt.

She tries to look casual as she leans against the wall next to her bedroom door, running a hand through her hair because she knows Alyssa likes to make her disheveled. She stares with wide eyes as Alyssa does her pants up and tries to make herself look less like she was making out with Emma in her living room. Why hadn't they just gone to the bedroom?

“And that’s why I think the Electoral College should be abolished,” Emma says when the door opens, sounding high pitched and a little out of breath.

"I can see your point," Alyssa bobbles her head. "Oh, hey, Kev. Didn't see you there."

“Hey,” Kevin says slowly as he watches them. “What’s up?”

Alyssa chuckles nervously. “Nothing is up. Right, Em?”

Emma nods. “Nope. Definitely not.”

Kevin keeps his gaze on them for a moment before shrugging and abandoning his backpack by the door, immediately moving to open the fridge. “Okay.”

There's a moment of awkward silence before Alyssa catches Emma's eyes and tries to subtly nod in the direction of the door while Kevin's attention is still on the fridge's contents.

"What?" Emma whispers. Alyssa rolls her eyes, nodding again with wide eyes.

Emma shakes her head, looking confused.

“Em?” Alyssa says with a fake smile. “Do you think you can help me with that thing? Now.” She gives Emma a pointed look, hoping she’ll take the hint.

Emma frowns. “What thing?”

“That thing you said you would help with, remember?" Alyssa says through her teeth, a little more forcefully than necessary, but Emma's eyes finally widen in realization.

“Oh, you mean that thing.” She straightens up immediately. “Yeah. Sure. Of course. Let’s go.”

Kevin keeps the fridge door open with a hand as he steps back and looks over at them again. “Why are you being weird?”

“We’re not being weird,” Alyssa says unconvincingly, grabbing Emma’s hand and tugging her in the direction of the door. "You're weird."

“You don’t have to speak in codes if you’re talking about girl things.” Kevin shrugs. “‘Because, you know, it doesn’t bother me.”

“What?”

Kevin gives them a beaming smile, looking proud of himself. “Shelby had the talk with me. Like, I know it’s totally natural; you can talk about it in front of me. Women shouldn’t have to feel embarrassed to talk about those things in front of their male friends.”

Alyssa exchanges a look with Emma. “Uh. That’s… exactly it. Sorry Kev, we didn’t want to make you uncomfortable?”

Kevin waves a hand dismissively, his attention already back in the fridge as he sniffs some leftover pizza in a box before shoving half a slice into his mouth.

“Right,” Emma says slowly, mildly disgusted. “We’re going now. Make sure to chew the food a few times so you don’t choke, okay, Kev.”

“Okay!” Kevin says around a mouthful. “But if you need someone to go, like, buy tampons or ice cream or something, I’m your man!”

“Thanks, Kev. But I think we got it,” Alyssa smiles, finally tugging Emma out the door.

Emma fondly rolls her eyes when she catches Alyssa looking at her with an amused grin. But then they're out the door and into Alyssa's apartment, and suddenly they're too preoccupied with other things to think about Kevin's antics.

It's not until a few hours later that Alyssa remembers the reason she had gone to Emma's in the first place. She thought that maybe they could talk about whatever is it they are doing, but then she got distracted by Emma's white dress shirt. The next thing she knew she was pushing Emma against the wall, and by the time Kevin had interrupted them, it had completely escaped her mind.

Well, Alyssa figures, this is as good a time as any to bring it up.

“Emma?” Alyssa calls softly, looking at the ceiling.

“Hm?” Emma rolls on her side, lazily opening one eye to look at Alyssa.

“Should we talk about this?”

“About what?”

Alyssa finally turns to Emma, staring at her for a moment. “I don’t know, Emma, we’re both naked in my bed. Shouldn’t that be enough of a hint?”

Emma chuckles. “Hey now, no need to be mean.” Her face turns serious. “So, you want to talk about, um, the fact that we’ve been having sex for a while now?”

“A few weeks, yeah. Like, what are we doing here, Em?”

“Erm, like right now?”

Alyssa rolls her eyes, waving an arm aimlessly. “Not right now. I meant it more like, what are we doing?”

“I don’t- I don’t know?” Emma frowns. “Having fun?” She suggests with a shrug.

Alyssa nods. “Okay. Are you…” She chews on her lips thoughtfully, pondering over what she wants to ask next. “Are you seeing other people?”

She’s not entirely sure why she asks it. Of course, she reasons with herself, if Emma is sleeping with someone, she should know. Safe sex and all that. But then, why does it feel like there’s more to it?

Emma gives Alyssa a skeptical smile. “Who would I be seeing? And when would I even have the time?”

Alyssa shrugs. Emma's smile turns into a frown. It's kind of cute. Alyssa has the sudden urge to kiss her, though she resists it this time.

“Are you seeing someone else?”

They're held in a staring contest that couldn't have lasted more than a few seconds, still, Alyssa can't identify what the look in Emma's eyes means before she averts her gaze.

Alyssa clears her throat. “I guess that I don’t feel like seeing anyone else right now. Not while we’re… sleeping together? Is that what we’re doing?”

Emma nods slowly. “Yeah… Like, we both haven’t dated anyone for a while, right? So, this could be a good thing. We could help each other out?" Emma chews on her bottom lip as she thinks for a second. "Just two friends that care a lot about each other and who like to spend time together and occasionally have amazing sex together.”

“So, like a no-strings-attached kind of thing?”

“If that’s what you want to call it. Sure.”

Alyssa shrugs. “Cool.”

“Cool.”

“Do you think we should tell the others?”

Emma snorts. “Why would we do that?”

“I don’t know. You want to keep it a secret?”

"It's not like that," Emma says, turning to lie on her back again. "You know what our friends are like.”

The conversation she had with Shelby that morning flashes back on Alyssa’s mind. “Yeah, you’re right.”

"Always am. You just don't recognize it enough."

"Shush it. Do you know what I'm thinking? I kind of like this sneaking-around thing we've been doing, but," Alyssa stops, catching Emma's eyes. "But if we're not telling anyone, we need to be more careful. Shelby now knows I'm seeing someone." Emma opens her mouth, but Alyssa keeps going before she can say anything. "Oh, and we should definitely pay more attention to where we leave hickeys."

Emma rolls her eyes. “You mean you should pay more attention. Do you have any idea how many hickeys there are on my body right now?”

Alyssa hums, lifting the covers just enough to be able to look up and down Emma’s body, biting her lips. “It’s a good look on you. Besides, it’s not my fault you’re so biteable. And at least no one can see them.” She arches an eyebrow, watching as Emma’s eyes find the hickey on her collarbone.

"Sorry about that," Emma says impishly.

“No, you’re not.”

"No, I'm not"

Alyssa shakes her head, smiling wickedly. Swiftly, she pushes the covers away and pulls on Emma’s arm until she rolls on top of Alyssa, holding herself up with both arms. Emma’s gaze trails down Alyssa’s chest to her stomach and back again.

“Are we done talking yet?”

“Yep.” Alyssa nods, the look in Emma’s eyes as she stares down at Alyssa making her shiver. “Glad we had this conversation.”

Emma hums, bowing her head to place small, open-mouthed kisses on Alyssa's neck.

“Me too.”

 


 

Emma shivers and tries to bury herself closer to Shelby on the bench they’re sharing. As they watch, Nick and Kaylee start sprinting after Alyssa when Kevin passes her the ball. The cold doesn't seem to be bothering them.

She’s half amused and half concerned as Kaylee unnecessarily tackles Kevin to the ground when she passes by him. She covers her eyes with a hand, wincing in sympathy when he lets out an undignified yelp of pain, though he is quick to spring up as soon as Kaylee is off him.

When Melissa sits down on her other side, Emma is more than a little happy. She cuddles closer to Shelby, shielding herself from the wind and smiling gratefully at Melissa when she passes Emma a steaming cup of coffee.

“So, what did I miss?” Melissa asks after a while, shaking her head when Nick almost slips on the grass. He manages to catch himself before he falls, sending two thumbs up and a bright smile in their general direction.

“Nothing, I guess.” Emma shrugs, not even trying to pretend like she understands whatever is going on with the game. “Alyssa scored a goal, but she also, sort of, punched Kaylee in the boob, so I don’t think it was valid?”

"It wasn't," Shelby growls from Emma's other side. She wisely decides not to question it further.

Melissa gets somewhat invested in the game alongside Shelby. They're cheering for Nick and Kaylee, occasionally yelling something at them. Emma tries to clap whenever Kevin or Alyssa has the ball, but it's half-hearted at best.

Shelby and Melissa whoop loudly when Kaylee catches the ball. Emma tries not to roll her eyes. Every time they act as if they were watching a real game, not four dumbasses who would more likely end up hurting themselves and each other with their stupidity.

Not for the first time, Emma wonders how this became a thing they do almost every other Sunday. She watches as Alyssa shoulder checks Nick and runs towards Kevin, and yet, after years of this, she still doesn’t really know what is going on.

Usually, they only stop when they're either too exhausted to keep going, or one of them gets injured. This time, it's the former, and Emma sighs in relief.

She really hates spending Sunday afternoons in the waiting room of the Emergency Department.

The walk back home is mostly nice; Emma pretends to understand what happened, nodding along to the others discussing whatever the hell happened during the game. Kaylee claims she and Nick won, and Kevin protests loudly, but Emma tunes them out when Alyssa tries to slip an arm over her shoulders.

“God, you smell," she says, screwing her face up in exaggerated disgust as she only half-heartedly pushes Alyssa away.

Alyssa chuckles, ignoring Emma's protests when she links their arms together. Kaylee is tucked on Kevin's side, her hand linked with Shelby's, swinging it distractedly between them as they all laugh at something, while Nick whispers something in Melissa's ear that makes her blush.

Alyssa shakes her head.

“What?” Emma asks, frowning.

"Nothing." Alyssa smiles softly. "You seem distracted, is all."

"Yes, well. I'm still recovering from the heart attack Kaylee almost gave me with that shit she pulled. I thought she had broken her neck.”

Alyssa laughs then. “C’mon.”

Emma huffs, trying to pull away, but Alyssa keeps her close. "It's in my right to worry. Remember that time Kevin had to get stitches in his forehead after one of those games? I'm pretty sure he got some brain damage from that. And that time you broke your wrist? And…"

“Oooh, I see,” Alyssa cuts Emma off, smirking mischievously. “So, you were just worried if my hand would retain its efficiency after this .”

Emma chokes on nothing, her face flushing. “I- that’s not. I don’t- What?”

Alyssa laughs harder.

 


 

Alyssa is still trying to catch her breath when she distractedly rolls on her side and wraps an arm around Emma's waist. In her defense, she wasn't actually thinking before she did it; her brain had pretty much been turned to mush not even a minute ago.

“Is this okay?” She asks on the skin of Emma’s neck, smiling to herself when she feels Emma shivering. She pulls Emma closer then, tightening the hold she had on her.

Emma hums contentedly, one of her hands finding Alyssa’s on her stomach and tangling their fingers together.

“Why wouldn’t it be?” Emma mumbles. “We cuddle all the time.”

“This is different.”

"Just because we're naked?" Emma asks teasingly, lifting her head just enough so that she can speak clearly. Alyssa lightly nips on the skin of her shoulder in retaliation.

“I guess so,” she says after a moment, nuzzling on the back of Emma’s neck and closing her eyes. She’s feeling too comfortable, warm, and sated to even begin to think about moving.

Emma squeezes Alyssa’s hand softly.

“I don’t mind.” She sounds as if she’s falling asleep already.

The other times they had sex mostly ended with one of them carelessly getting dressed and sneaking back to their own place, and the few times when they had fallen asleep on the same bed together was just because they had been too exhausted to move and ended up passing out each on one side of the bed.

But this, Alyssa muses, this is nice.

The thing about sex with Emma is not that it is usually mind-blowing and always leaves Alyssa feeling kind of sore in a good way. Not only that, anyway. They’ve been friends for such a long time that they already know everything there’s to know about the other; there’s no expectations or fear of disappointment. Everything between them is always so effortless.

Perhaps that’s what makes it all so different.

And so, what if after that night naked-cuddling becomes a regular thing between them too? That’s just another perk of sleeping with your best friend.

Chapter 4

Notes:

so, how y'all doing?

Chapter Text

“Hey, Emma! Guess what?” Kaylee is almost vibrating with excitement when she drops down at the armchair in the coffeehouse.

Emma arches one eyebrow but doesn't have a chance to ask as Alyssa immediately stops in front of Kaylee, shaking her head.

“Kaylee, no.” Alyssa turns to Emma. “Honestly, it’s nothing, Em.”

Kaylee rolls her eyes, leaning forward to catch Emma's eyes. "C'mon, this is good news," she says, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively.

"What news?" Emma rests back on the couch, one arm over the backrest as she smiles at Alyssa and then Kaylee.

“Alyssa totally got the number of this hot nurse at the hospital!”

"Alyssa… what?" Emma drops her arms back down, a confused frown on her face as she stares at Kaylee. Alyssa mutters something about a coffee before quickly making her way over to the counter; Emma can hear it when she loudly greets Barry.

Kaylee claps her hands once, oblivious to the shift in Emma's mood.

“So, you remember my cousin Adele, right? She finally had the baby. Which is great because it feels like she was pregnant for fifteen months. But anyway, Alyssa and I went to visit her and the baby at the hospital this morning, right? And this nurse just came into the room to do whatever, and she totally started hitting on Alyssa. Like, she wasn’t even being subtle about it, too.”

"It's not like that, Kay," Alyssa says with a sigh. Emma hadn't even noticed when she came back, but she has a coffee mug in her hands now.

"Please.” Kaylee rolls her eyes. “I saw the way she was looking at you. It was indecent, Alyssa. She also asked you out on a date. You got her number, right?"

Alyssa sighs again before sitting down next to Emma on the loveseat but doesn't say anything else. She knows Kaylee is staring expectantly at her, but, suddenly, the décor on the other side of the room is much more interesting. Has that ugly chair always been there? And what is it with the 90's style posters?

Kaylee rolls her eyes again before giving up with a huff.

“Whatever. I’m gonna get a coffee, too, save some excitement for when I come back,” she says drily, and with another sigh of annoyance, she is gone.

Alyssa waits until Kaylee is out of earshot before turning to Emma.

“I was going to talk to you about it later,” she says sincerely.

When Emma doesn't look at her, she scoots closer until she can knock her foot against Emma’s, offering her a tentative smile.

Emma nods, not looking up from the half-full mug on her hands.

“Right.”

“It’s really not like that, Em. Ashley came to talk to me when I was leaving, but I-

“Really, you don’t have to tell me the details about you and Cassidy or whatever." Emma cuts her off, her tone biting. "It's not like you owe me an explanation anyway."

Alyssa recoils a little at Emma's tone.

"I don't?" She asks again with a scowl, a warning in her voice.

“No,” Emma says firmly without meeting Alyssa’s eyes. “You’re free to do whatever you want with your life. We were just goofing around; I don’t care either way.”

Alyssa scoffs. “Just goofing around?”

“Exactly.”

"Fine, then," Alyssa says, sliding away from Emma as much as she can in the limited space of the loveseat. "I was going to say that I told Ashley I couldn't go out with her. But I guess I don't have any reasons not to since we're just goofing around.”

“Fine by me.” Emma shrugs as she leans over to put her mug down at the coffee table a bit more forcefully than necessary.

“Fine.”

“Fine.”

“What’s up?” Kaylee asks, having heard only the last part of the conversation. She raises an eyebrow, looking from Emma to Alyssa and the way they seem to be avoiding looking at each other.

“I was just telling Emma that I think I might call Ashley later,” Alyssa says pointedly at Emma, who turns to her with a scowl.

Emma gets up abruptly, grabbing her messenger bag and coat. “I’m going home.”

Kaylee raises an eyebrow at Alyssa, hoping to understand what the hell just happened, but Alyssa ignores her too.

“I thought we were waiting here for the other so we could grab lunch together?” She asks Emma, her eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“I’m not hungry.”

“But then who’s gonna pay?”

Emma is already out the door by the time she finishes her question. When Alyssa finally looks back at her, all the reply she gets is a shrug, which unsurprisingly, is not helpful at all.

 


 

There’s a melody coming from somewhere when Alyssa walks into Emma and Kevin’s place later that day. She follows the sound until she’s standing next to Emma’s bedroom, and up close, she finally recognizes the song. She can’t help it when her lips tug up in a small smile.

“With a chick-chick here

and a chick-chick there

Here a chick there a chick

everywhere a chick-"

The music stops abruptly when she finally knocks on the door.

“Come in, Kev,” Emma calls softly after a moment. Alyssa allows herself a deep breath before turning the doorknob and pushing the door open.

“I’m not Kevin,” she says sheepishly when she steps into the room, closing the door behind her and leaning against it.

She barely resists the urge to smile at the sight when she looks around the room. Emma is sitting on the floor, her back to the bed frame and her old guitar propped on one knee. The chick and the duck sat dutifully in front of her as if they had been paying attention to her as she sang.

"Were you singing for them?" She nods in the pets' direction, though it is obvious who she means anyway.

"Nope." Emma clears her throat; she steals a glance in Alyssa's direction before quickly averting her eyes and shifting her position. Awkwardly leaning up to secure the guitar on top of the mattress.

The duck quacks. It sounds distinctively like a complaint.

“Liar,” Alyssa calls out with a smile.

Emma rolls her eyes, but Alyssa can see the way her lips are tugging up slightly, too. She and Emma had always fallen into this kind of easy banter, and it’s a relief to know they hadn’t lost it, even after their fight that morning.

Emma’s eyes flit back to Alyssa, stopping at her face.

“So. How was the date?”

“Fine,” Alyssa says, shifting from one foot to another. She stares at the chick as it starts hopping around the duck, no longer sitting calmly now that Emma isn’t playing for them anymore.

“Good.”

"I was thinking about inviting her to come to the coffeehouse next time, actually." She picks on her fingers as she says it and doesn't notice the dark look that crosses Emma's face.

“That’s cool, I guess.”

Alyssa sighs, just barely resisting the urge to smack Emma upside the head this time.

Emma.”

She doesn’t get a reply; instead, all Emma does is stare straight ahead with a petulant look. It only lasts for a moment before her shoulders sag, and she bows her head with a guilty expression.

“I’m sorry,” Emma says weekly.

“Why are you sorry?” Alyssa asks with a raised eyebrow. The look on her face clearly saying that Emma is not getting out of this one so easily.

Emma chews on her bottom lip for a moment, mulling over what she wants to say.

“I’m sorry I was a dick earlier. I should have let you talk before acting like a total douche. I guess I didn’t-” Emma stops and shakes her head. “No. I really didn’t want you to go out with any stupid, hot nurse.”

Alyssa doesn’t hold back her smile this time.

"That's interesting because I thought you didn't care? We were just goofing around anyway…"

And that’s how Emma knows she is already forgiven.

“You see,” Emma starts, huffing a little under her breath before finally getting up from the floor. “I think my dictionary may be a bit different than yours.”

Alyssa quirks an eyebrow.

“Is that so?”

"Yep," Emma says, popping the p and nodding confidently. There's a lopsided smile on her face that Alyssa decidedly doesn't find attractive at all. “I mean," she starts, stepping closer to Alyssa until there are only a few inches between them. "In my dictionary, it says, right underneath ‘goofing around’ that, when you care about someone, and they care about you, too, then you get to goof together. Like, just two people, no nurses involved?"

“Really?”

"Really." Emma nods again. "It also says that those two people can kiss and do other stuff together, too." At that, she waggles her eyebrows, and Alyssa chuckles. "But not just that, you know? You can also do other things, like cuddle and go out and be silly together, hence the term goofing around.”

Alyssa stares at Emma for a beat or two before closing the small distance between them and pulling her into a kiss.

"You're an idiot," Alyssa says against Emma's lips when she pulls back. "But you're cute." She presses a kiss against the tip of Emma's nose. "I like your dictionary."

Emma hums appreciatively, her arms already wrapped against Alyssa’s waist. “Me too, we should get you one of those, too.”

“Shut up.”

“Does this mean you’re not going out with that nurse for a second date?”

“I didn’t even go on the first,” Alyssa admits with a blush.

Emma pulls back a little, a stupid smile on her face.

“You didn’t?”

“I should have. Because you’re an ass.”

“But you didn’t. Even though I was an ass?”

“I already told you this that I really don’t feel like seeing anyone else right now. You should have remembered that.”

“I know, but we also said it was a no-strings-attached kind of thing, right? And that was before stupid hot nurse Eileen asked you out.”

“I mean -” Alyssa pulls back a little, chewing on her lips as she considers her next words “- maybe, having some strings attached wouldn’t be such a bad thing?”

Emma nods a bit too eagerly before catching herself. She clears her throat awkwardly. “I mean, yeah. Just- just some strings attached then, that seems wise."

Alyssa agrees.

“Exactly. We're adults anyways; we know what we're doing."

“Yeah, totally.” Emma's eyes drop down to Alyssa's lips. If she has anything else to add to the conversation, it is immediately gone from her mind. “I really want to take your clothes off right now, but I think the chick and the duck are staring.”

“Okay.” Alyssa takes in a deep breath, nodding once. “Good thing I live right across the hall, right?”

“You’re a genius. Let’s go.”

 


 

“Emma is dating someone in secret!” Kevin announces loudly as he runs into Alyssa's apartment. Emma’s phone is held up high in one hand as if it were a trophy.

Kevin grins when he notices that everyone is over for movie night already and he has successfully gotten all eyes on him.

"What?" Shelby asks, stealing a quick glance to where Alyssa is half-sitting, half-lying sideways on the armchair, and staring at Kevin with wide eyes.

“Kevin! I swear to God-” Emma yells from somewhere in the hallway, and Kevin is quick to scamper over to the living room. Which was a good idea because Emma barges in right after him a moment later. She stops behind the couch, her eyes on Kevin as he stands triumphantly in the middle of the living room.

“Please, just tell us this one isn't crazy, too," Kaylee says, sounding almost bored as Nick snorts a laugh.

"If it's a secret, then how do you know about it?” Alyssa asks Kevin, immediately blushing when everyone turns to look at her instead.

“Well,” Kevin says proudly, waving Emma’s phone around for everyone to see as he paces back and forth in front of the TV. “I’ve noticed, for the past few weeks, that Emma has been on her phone a lot more than usual. Always texting someone.” He narrows his eyes, looking at Emma accusingly. “But when I asked, she refused to tell me who it was. Me! Her best friend. So, I had to assume it was a girl. But she would neither confirm nor deny it until just now when I caught a glimpse of a text she got.”

He sounds so smug; Emma never wanted to strangle him more.

“Has anyone ever told you how stupidly obnoxious you are, Shields?” Emma asks, quickly running around the couch and launching herself at him, making a grab for her phone. Kevin is quicker, and at the last moment, manages to jump out of the way.

“What did this text say?” Kaylee asks, suddenly looking more interested as she sits up.

“It was-” Kevin begins, but Emma lunges at him again when he’s momentarily distracted by Kaylee and slaps a hand over his mouth.

“If you dare say a word of what you read, I’ll post that video of you acting a scene from Days of Our Lives with the chick and the duck,” Emma says in a low voice, glaring at Kevin as he gulps down in fear. "I’m gonna let go now; do we have an understanding, Kev?" He nods twice, and Emma slowly lets go of him.

Kevin takes in a deep breath and holds it as he takes a small step away from Emma. Before she can react, he’s dashing away and trying to hide behind Shelby on the couch.

“It was a sext and-”

“KEVIN!”

Kevin shrieks and half jumps, half falls down the back of the couch when Emma gives chase again. He tosses the phone to Alyssa who just barely manages to catch it instinctively.

“Alright. Enough.” Nick catches Emma around the waist when she tries to run past him, holding her back as Kevin positions himself behind Alyssa for protection. Nick is quick to toss Emma on the couch, hurriedly sitting down on her lap when it looks like she’s about to get up.

"Get off me, Nicholas, or I'll-" He cuts her off with a hand on her mouth, much like she had done with Kevin moments ago.

“No one’s getting murdered today.” Nick turns his attention to Kevin. “Tell us what you saw, Kev.”

“Okay.” Kevin straightens his back and clears his throat, quickly averting his eyes when he notices the glare Emma is sending his way. “I’m not gonna say what I read word by word, but just so y'all know, it was dirty.” He arches one eyebrow suggestively as if no one would understand what he meant otherwise.

“But did you see who sent it?” Kaylee asks impatiently.

“Well, no.” He winces at the way almost everyone groans.

"C'mon, dude!"

"Calm down," he says, putting a hand up. "That's why I got her phone." Kevin points down to Alyssa. She's still clutching Emma’s phone in one hand, silently watching everything unfold in front of her.

“Then why didn't you just look at who she was texting?" Shelby asks, staring intently at Alyssa in a way that makes her want to squirm.

“Because I don't know her passcode. BUT -” he raises his voice before anyone else can say something, “Alyssa does!”

All eyes turn to Alyssa again as she looks at the phone in her hands, but before she can do or say anything, Nick yelps and snatches the hand he had on Emma’s mouth back to hold it protectively against his chest.

“Dude! Did you just bit-” His sentence is interrupted with a shriek as Emma somehow manages to push him off her lap and send him flying to the floor.

Then she’s up and making a beeline to Alyssa’s armchair before anyone can stop her. She quickly grabs her phone from Alyssa’s hand and pockets it with a scowl.

“You suck,” she says to the room. “Each and every single one of you. Just know that I’m never covering the bill when we go out again.” She turns to Kevin. “I hope the duck pees on your bed every day for the rest of your life.”

Kevin pouts.

“Aw, man,” Nick moans, still on the floor rubbing one of his knees with a pained frown. “What’s the point of having a rich friend if she's not gonna pay for things?”

“Should’ve thought of that before you sat on me, Boomer." She directs her glare at him; he cowers a little.

"Okay, everyone shut up now," Kaylee says before Nick has a chance to come up with a retort. "Now, Emma, tell us who you're dating," she sounds weirdly threatening. Emma falls down half on top of Alyssa on the armchair when she tries to take a step back.

Emma scoffs. “I’m not telling any of you.” She sounds almost like a petulant child. Kaylee drags a hand down her face with a sigh.

“Just tell us this one isn't crazy, so at least we can sleep in peace and not worry that some girl will break into your place and try to steal all of your underwear again or murder you or whatever."

"That was one time!" Emma frowns though it quickly morphs into a shit-eating grin. “Aw, I didn’t know you cared that much, Kay.”

“Emma,” Kaylee says slowly and a bit menacingly.

“First, she’s not my girlfriend. But, Fine.” Emma concedes. “No, she’s not crazy." She pauses for a beat. "I mean, I’m like, ninety-nine percent? Ninety-eight percent sure she won’t attempt to murder me, though I’m not sure about the underwear thing...”

She tries not to wince when Alyssa subtly pinches her.

“Aw, Emma is in love, guys,” Shelby says mockingly, one hand on her chest and a look of mock affection on her face. “Never thought I’d see the day.”

“Wha-uh,” Emma squeaks, her voice suddenly catching on her throat. “Who – who said anything about love?” She forces out a chuckle, slipping a little where she had settled beside Alyssa and stealing a quick glance in her direction. “Me? In love? Pfft, are you – are you crazy? I’m, no. Me, not,” she snaps her mouth shut then, shaking her head and fiddling with her glasses.

“That’s cute,” Kaylee fawns.

“I told you guys,” Kevin says smugly. “You should’ve seen the look on her face as she texted this girl. All soft and mush, and ugh.”

“Has anyone noticed how quiet Alyssa has been?” Shelby asks abruptly, pulling all the attention from Emma and to Alyssa, who’s doing a bad job of pretending to watch whatever is on the TV.”

“Oh my God,” Kaylee yells suddenly, pointing a finger at Alyssa. “You!”

Alyssa turns sharply to Kaylee, blushing from the tips of her ears down to her neck. “What-? Me? I’m not sleeping with Emma!”

“What?” Kaylee falters slightly.

"No, of course, you're not," Shelby says, sickly sweet and condescending, a glint in her eyes as they flicker between Emma and Alyssa.

“You know who Emma is seeing. That’s why you haven’t said anything,” Kaylee glares at her.

Alyssa exhales slowly, her heart beating a samba inside her chest. “Oh.”

"So?" Kaylee leans forward a little, and so do Kevin and Nick.

“So what?” Alyssa shrugs, looking anywhere but at her friends.

“Tell us!”

“Erm,” she chances a quick glance at Emma. She looks just as lost as Alyssa feels. “I-”

“Alyssa, If you open your mouth I’ll – I will…”

“You’ll what, Emma? You can’t even finish a sentence. C’mon, Alyssa, spill!” Kaylee waves an arm around in a get-on-with-it motion.

“Sorry guys, I promised.”

Kaylee falls back on the cushions with a groan. “Why does she know, and we don’t?”

“Because she isn’t annoying,” Emma says to Kaylee with a smirk, poking her tongue out when she rolls her eyes.

Nick chooses that moment to finally pick himself off from the floor. “Fine, whatever. When are you introducing her to us?”

“Let me see,” Emma pretends to think about it for a moment. “How about never?”

“Why not?” Nick frowns. “I got married, like, two months ago. Maybe some of my good luck will rub off on you." He winks at her. Emma pulls a face.

"No offense, but gross. I don't want anything from you rubbing off on me."

“Oh yeah.” Kaylee nods, a shit-eating grin on her face. “We know what you want rubbing off on you.”

Alyssa at least has the decency to pretend like she isn't laughing; the others don't.

“I hate every single one of you.”

“We love you too, Ems,” Kevin says, judging that it’s safe enough for him to come around and sit down on the couch too.

Emma grumbles something under her breath that, unsurprisingly, doesn’t sound anything like an I love you too.

 

 

“I’m hungry,” Shelby complains a while later when everyone is quietly watching the movie Nick had chosen earlier.

Instantly, Alyssa can feel all eyes turning to her. “I told you, I’m not cooking today.”

“I’m not paying for the pizza, too,” Emma says right after.

“Fine,” Nick says with a roll of his eyes. “I’ll get the pizza today,” he pauses for a moment, his eyes on Emma and an insufferable smirk on his face, “but only because I’m proud that Emma finally got out of her dry spell.”

The sound of the TV is drowned out by Kevin’s boisterous laughter while Kaylee and Shelby chuckle. Even Alyssa is smiling, though she tries to look like she isn’t when Emma glares at her.

“Okay, I’m coming with you.” Shelby pushes herself up from the couch, a hand extended to Kaylee with a raised eyebrow.

“Why not?” Kaylee shrugs and allows herself to be pulled up by Shelby while Nick gets up from the floor.

“I’m going too,” Kevin says. The four of them turn to stare down at Emma and Alyssa; they're still sharing the armchair and haven't made a move to follow them. "You two coming?"

Emma grumbles something that sounds like a no, and Alyssa shakes her head, too.

Kevin shrugs. “We’ll be back in a little. Alyssa,” he starts, trying to sound serious, "we all know you are capable of extracting information from Emma. Do your best. We'll catch up once she isn't near." He gives her a mock salute, then winks before turning on his heel to follow the others out.

"Do you think they know that they can just call the pizza place, and someone will bring the pizza to our door?" Emma asks though she's glad for this small moment of peace.

Alyssa shrugs in answer. They wait in silence until they can't hear the others anymore.

“The text Kevin read,” Alyssa whispers, staring intently at the scene paused on the TV, “was it the last one I sent? About –”

“Yep.”

Alyssa hides her face in one hand with a groan. “Oh my God.”

Emma lifts a hand to rub soothing circles on Alyssa’s back, “I know.”

“Why do our friends suck?”

“You know, it's all your fault; I didn't even wanna be their friend in the first place.”

“Please, Shelby and Kevin were your friends first.”

“I meant Nick and Kaylee; they're obviously the most annoying.”

Alyssa laughs a little as she disentangles herself from Emma and climbs over her to get up from the armchair. Emma tries to settle more comfortably on the seat, only managing to get more or less upright against the backrest. Alyssa stares down at her for a second before nudging Emma’s legs open with one of her own until there’s enough space for her as she bends over to steal a kiss.

“How was work today?”

Emma hums. "Not bad," she says with a smile. "I'm gonna quit it one of these days."

Alyssa shakes her head. “You say that every day.”

“Just watch me. One day I will!”

With one last kiss, Alyssa straightens herself, pulling Emma up with one hand as she does so and steers them in the kitchen’s direction. “I saved some leftover lasagna for you. You can’t tell the others, though.”

“Oh God, I might just kiss you.”

Alyssa stops in her tracks, turning around to sneak one hand around Emma’s neck and pull her closer. “You should definitely do that, too."

 


 

Alyssa can hear the sound of TV playing low in the living room as soon as she pushes the door to Emma and Kevin’s apartment open.

“Em?” She calls softly as she walks in, taking a moment until her eyes can adjust to the soft lighting. She follows the noise, being careful to look where she’s stepping in case the chick or the duck tries to sneak up on her – or in case she tripped on them. It happened before. Shut up.

She finds Emma easily enough, raising an eyebrow as she watches the shape of her burrowed deep under the mountain of covers she has on top of herself. For some reason, the chick is perched on top of the pile.

“Kevin told me you were feeling sick, but this is just pathetic,” Alyssa says to the lump on the couch.

“I’m dying, Alyssa,” comes the reply. Emma’s voice is so hoarse that she can barely hear her.

“Well, don’t say I didn’t warn you,” Alyssa says sternly even as she steps closer to the couch, disregarding the way she can see the duck standing next to the couch, posing as a security guard. She has the distinct feeling he’s glaring at her.

She hums a little when the palm of her hand makes contact with Emma’s forehead and feels how warm she is. “You have a fever. Have you taken something to get it down already?”

Emma sighs as she leans on Alyssa's touch, feeling comforted by the way her thumb rubs soothingly on her skin. "I don't need medicine, 'm totally fine," Emma mumbles.

Alyssa snorts a small laugh. "You just told me you were dying."

“I was being dramatic, I’m feeling a lot better now. Thanks for stopping by.” A coughing fit immediately disproves her words.

"Right," Alyssa rolls her eyes, leaning back but not going too far away. She takes a moment to stare down at Emma and then at the chick, weighing on her options before making a decision and moving closer again to, very carefully, pick it up and quickly set it down next to the duck on the floor.

She chooses to ignore Emma’s frown and the way the chicken clucks indignantly at her, too.

“Don’t be a baby,” Alyssa says. Emma isn’t sure if she’s talking to her or the chicken.

Emma pouts. “Yasmine was keeping me company.”

"Yasmine, really?" Alyssa barely resists the urge to roll her eyes this time, she busies herself instead with peeling off each layer of blanket and bed covers until she can finally see Emma on the couch, not just her eyes and the top of her head. "You and Kevin wait months to name it, and then you settle for Yasmine?"

“Why are you being so mean right now?”

Alyssa scoffs. “I’m not mean.”

“But it’s cold and you’re taking away my blankets.”

“It’s not that cold. I told you, you have a fever.”

"I don't get sick," Emma says stubbornly, but she doesn't fight as Alyssa pulls on one of her arms until she's in a sitting position.

“Obviously,” Alyssa snarks. “Come on, you need to get out of these clothes.”

“That’s what she said,” Emma says mockingly, making no effort to get up even as Alyssa keeps pulling on her arms.

Alyssa chuckles, deciding on a new tact and starting to tug on Emma's shirt sleeve until she relents and grudgingly stands up from the couch.

“You need a shower,” Alyssa says, still not letting go of Emma’s sleeve as she maneuvers them around the chick and the duck and in the direction of the bathroom.

"But do I really have to?" Emma whines, stopping just outside the bathroom and refusing to go in. Her pout is ineffective against Alyssa's resolve.

Alyssa shakes her head with a sigh. "You don't have to." Her eyes narrow as she lets go of Emma and crosses her arms over her chest. "Of course, it would be good for you since you have a fever. But if you really gonna be a baby about this, then I can just call Betsy and let her deal with you."

Emma’s mouth hangs open as she stares at Alyssa for a beat. Wordlessly, she turns around, grudgingly marching into the bathroom.

“Gee, okay. Fine, I’m going. No need to threaten me, woman.”

Alyssa chuckles, watching Emma with a raised eyebrow.

“It’s funny how scared you get of your grandma every time you get sick.”

"Well, yes. Of course I am, Alyssa," Emma begins slowly, her words muffled and barely understandable. "You know her, and I just know she'll take the red-eye and be here in the morning to fuss over me. And once she's here, she'll make me eat chicken noodle soup. And you know I hate chicken noodle soup, but I could never tell her that because Gran thinks I love it, so she makes it special for me."

Alyssa stares nonplussed at Emma for a beat before she closes her eyes, taking a deep breath. "I don't know how to answer that. Shower, now."

Emma grumbles something under her breath; it sounds suspiciously like "bossy."

Alyssa chooses to let this one go. Instead, she closes the bathroom door behind herself and leaves Emma to her shower.

 

 

From outside the bathroom door, Alyssa can faintly hear the sound of the water running, and she smiles. She was half-convinced Emma wouldn't actually get into the shower without further prompting. She knocks twice before unceremoniously pushing the door open and walking in, a small pile of Emma’s clothes under one arm.

“'Lyssa?” Emma asks as she pokes her head out of the shower curtain. Alyssa thinks she might be feeling a little better already as she watches Emma’s hair flop to the side in a shampoo mohawk.

It’s kind of adorable.

"Who else would it be?" Alyssa asks, amused, and watches as Emma shrugs once before pulling the curtain back. She settles on top of the closed toilet lid, still holding onto Emma's clothes. It takes a moment until she realizes she could have just as well waited outside.

The shower is turned off before she can leave. Again, Emma pulls the curtain just enough to stretch her arm in Alyssa’s direction, her fingers wiggling.

“Can you pass me the towel?”

Alyssa shakes her head amusedly but stands up to pick it up anyway.

Emma's face is flushed with the heat when she steps out of the shower, her short hair sticking in every direction after she tries to towel dry it.

Alyssa is suddenly struck by affection for this idiot.

“Um –” Emma squints awkwardly at Alyssa for a few seconds, “could you turn around? Please”

With a small laugh, Alyssa hands Emma the clothes she had picked for her and then does as asked. “You do realize I’ve seen you naked before, right?” She asks teasingly.

“Shut up,” is all Emma manages to grumble in reply.

Alyssa laughs harder.

 

 

Emma plops down on the couch, grabbing the closest blanket to wrap around herself. She won't admit it, but she does feel a lot better now that Alyssa has made her eat something and then pushed some cold medicine in her direction.

Grudgingly, she swallows it with some cool water that immediately makes her sore throat feel better for a few moments. Not that she'll ever admit it.

“Your bedroom is literally seven feet away,” Alyssa says as she stops in front of the TV.

She makes sure to block her view, staring Emma down until she takes the mug from Alyssa’s hand.

Emma had hoped if she pretended to not see it, then Alyssa would put it away.

“I’m comfy here.” She takes one sniff at the tea and purses her lips. “Is this really supposed to smell like dirty socks?”

“Yes.” Alyssa crosses her arms over her chest, one eyebrow raised until Emma finally takes a sip, immediately pulling a disgusted face at the taste. She takes another sip anyway, knowing better than to question Alyssa at this point. “It will make your throat feel better. And maybe it’ll also make you rethink your choices next time you decide to walk home under the pouring rain.”

Emma pouts.

“But it was only one block, and-”

“And would it have killed you to wait twenty minutes until it stopped? Or, I don’t know, get an umbrella, like a sensible person?"

“Stop being mean to me. I’m sick.”

With a raised eyebrow, Alyssa motions for Emma to take another sip.

"I thought you said you never get sick," she says with an amused smile. Maybe she is enjoying watching all the faces Emma pulls as she slowly sips the tea. Sometimes she was too much like a child, honestly.

Emma sticks her tongue out in defiance, further proving Alyssa's point, but she doesn't argue further. Alyssa takes that as a win.

"Where are your glasses?"

“Dunno. Don't care. Don't want them right now."

With a long-suffering sigh, Emma takes one last sip and is finally done with the tea, passing the mug back to Alyssa and promptly falling back down on the couch with a groan.

"Okay," Alyssa nods, though she still takes a look around the room until she can find said glasses because she knows Emma will wake up tomorrow with no idea of where they are and be very grumpy when she can't find them.

She finally spots Emm's glasses half-hidden behind a picture frame next to the TV and makes a mental note of it.

“Do you want me to stay?” She asks softly, coming closer and watching Emma’s eyes flutter closed as exhaustion takes over.

“Please?”

Alyssa hums, stifling a yawn. She takes one last look at Emma before making her way to her bedroom to find some clothes for herself to sleep in. She ignores the chick and the duck huddling together on top of the bed.

Emma opens her eyes when she hears Alyssa walking back into the living room wearing a pair of boxers and one of Emma's old flannels. She pretends that the sight of Alyssa wearing her clothes doesn't make her chest do acrobatics inside her chest.

Wordlessly, Emma moves until her back is pressed to the backrest, making enough space for Alyssa to lie down next to her. Alyssa sighs contentedly when she settles down next to Emma; feeling one arm wrap around her waist in a position that has become so familiar to them.

They wriggle a little until they are both comfortable in the small space, Emma pulling a blanket over them when they have settled.

“Thank you,” she murmurs, her words tickling the back of Alyssa’s neck, “for taking care of me.”

"Anytime," Alyssa replies, her eyes already fluttering closed.

It's warm under the blanket, even in the limited space they're sharing Alyssa feels comfortable. She listens closely until Emma's breathing slows down. Only then does she allow herself to drift off, too.

It’s a bit later when Alyssa wakes up to the sound of the door to the apartment opening. She can hear it when Kevin swears under his breath as he tries to make his way in the dark without bumping into anything; she's grateful he doesn't turn on the lights even though she hears him tripping into something or another.

Alyssa is almost falling asleep again when she feels the blanket being carefully adjusted so it's covering her arms and Emma's shoulders too.

 

 

It’s not morning yet when Alyssa wakes up again from what she knows was a pleasant dream, though she doesn’t actually remember what it was about. She smiles a little, rolling on her side and stretching her arms above her head before realizing she wasn’t supposed to be alone on the couch.

Slowly, Alyssa opens one eye and then another, watching as Emma walks away.

“Where are you going?” She mumbles sleepily, snuggling further on the blanket, failing to hold back a yawn.

“Sorry,” Emma says, turning around to look at Alyssa. “I didn’t mean to wake you up; I just needed a cup of water. I'll be right back."

“Mmkay,” Alyssa hums, her eyes already falling shut again.

When Emma walks back into the living room, Alyssa is sprawled out on the couch, taking up all the space. Emma bites her lip to keep herself from laughing. Carefully, she kneels down next to her, one hand running through Alyssa's hair until she stirs and her eyes flutter open again.

“Hey,” Emma calls softly, “let’s go to bed.”

Alyssa blinks at her, confused for a moment; she still sits up and takes the hand Emma is offering, allowing herself to be guided to Emma's bedroom. She can hear Kevin snoring as they pass by the half-open door of his room.

Alyssa shivers a bit when she falls down on top of the mattress. Unlike the warmth of the couch, the sheets feel cool against the bare skin of her legs. Belatedly, she notices that the chick and the duck are nowhere to be seen.

Emma takes a moment to join her, but as soon as she does, Alyssa finds herself scooting closer until they are almost nose to nose. She hums, shifting even closer and pulling on Emma’s arm until she takes the hint and wraps it around her middle.

“Night, Em,” Alyssa whispers against Emma’s skin.

“Nigh, Lys," Emma whispers right back, her voice not as hoarse as it was earlier.

Alyssa lets out a small sigh of contentment when Emma tightens the hold she has on her. She's silent for long enough that Emma's pretty sure she has fallen asleep again, though, for some reason, she can't seem to do the same.

Even with how tired she feels her eyes won't close, so instead, she keeps them trained on Alyssa. She is hoping that maybe if she keeps looking then the sudden weird mix of feelings swirling through her mind will start to make sense.

“You’re staring,” Alyssa mumbles after a few moments.

“Sorry,” Emma says, though she doesn’t avert her eyes.

Alyssa shakes her head, opening one single eye to stare back at Emma. The strange look on her face makes her lips tug up.

“Whatcha thinking about?” Through a gap in the blinds, Alyssa can see as some light starts to stream in. She's distracted for a moment until she hears Emma clear her throat.

"You're my best friend, you know," Emma says softly, a weird intonation to her voice as she says it.

Alyssa's small smile widens anyway. She leans up to press a kiss to Emma's lips.

“Good." She waits until Emma's eyes are closed before calling her. "Hey, Em."

"Hm?"

"You're my best friend, too."

Alyssa settles against her again, drifting off almost instantly. Emma tries to do the same.

Out of nowhere, there's this annoying movie playing in her head of all their moments together – before and after they started sleeping together. When Emma closes her eyes, her mind wanders back to when she first met Alyssa.

Shelby had been the one to introduce them, actually. She remembers that day vividly because for some reason she couldn't figure out it had felt life-changing at the time.

They had quickly become friends. Or perhaps it would be more accurate to say that friendship came easily because even after only having met for a few hours, it really felt as if they had known each other for years.

Emma smiles, remembering the first months of their friendships and how taken she had been with Alyssa back then.

There was this one time after she had gotten slightly drunk at a party when she had admitted to Kevin that maybe – just a possibility, really – she had a crush on Alyssa.

It's almost funny to remember this now because those feelings had gone away with time as they got closer to each other and their friendship became stronger. Emma hadn't thought about this in years, actually.

It had made sense back then. Emma hand’t know many lesbians and Alyssa had always been a very touchy person, she wasn’t used to that. Surely it would’ve been easy to confuse a close friendship with something else.

It’s not like it -

Emma’s eyes snap open all of sudden.

For a moment, it feels as if she can't breathe as realization slowly dawns on her.

Oh.

Oh.

Fuck.

Chapter 5

Notes:

if this chapter had a title it’d be something along the lines of "the one where they almost finally find half a braincell"

stay safe y'all!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

When Kevin finally gets home that night after work, he is solely thinking about the sandwich he is gonna ask Alyssa to make him because today was a good day. This new assistant director realys said he has potential and he deserves to celebrate it with good food. He knows that’s not going to happen when the first thing he sees as he steps into their apartment is Emma.

More specifically, he sees Emma pacing the length of their living floor, so absorbed in whatever is it that is going on in her head that she doesn’t even notice when he walks in. It’s kind of amusing because the chick is trying to follow but isn’t quick enough to get to Emma when she turns around. The duck doesn’t seem to care.

He is not so amused when he notices the worried crinkle in between her eyes and he’s suddenly worried too.

“Em?” Kevin asks softly so as not to spook her too much. It doesn’t really work because Emma still turns to him with a startled jump and wide eyes. “What’s up?”

He abandons his bag by the door, taking small steps in her direction and trying to remember what he learned from the documentary on feral kittens he watched the other day with Shelby. It might come in handy.

“I screwed up, Kevin,” Emma tells him when she stops pacing long enough to look at him before resuming it again, which is honestly making him feel a little dizzy.

Kevin hums low in his throat, one hand coming up to his chin to stroke the day-old stubble, his eyes still following Emma.

“Like eat-a-five-day-old-leftover-that-may-or-may-not-have-been-left-out-of-the-fridge-overnight screwed-up or like laundering-money-for-the-mafia-screwed-up screwed up?”

“I-” Emma gapes at him for a moment. He takes the opportunity to mentally pat himself on the back because she has finally stopped walking to stare at him as if he just grew a second head. “What?”

The only answer she gets is a shrug, which Kevin immediately regrets because a second later Emma starts her pacing again.

“I’m sorry!” He says, stepping closer to block Emma’s path. His hands quickly reach for her shoulders before she can turn around. “I was thinking about work,” Kevin shakes his head. “Just tell me what’s wrong and I’ll help you. You know you can talk to me about anything, right?”

Emma nods, calming slightly as she finally takes her first deep breath since she started this journey along the length of their living room. Kevin sounds so caring and worried, and she’s suddenly reminded of why they became such good friends in the first place, despite him being sort of an asshole when they met.

“Okay,” Emma says after she takes another deep breath, nodding again when Kevin bobs his head encouragingly at her. “Okay,” she repeats, and then instead of continuing she purses her lips and no words come out.

“Em-”

AlyssaandIhavebeensleepingtogetherandnowIthinkImlovewithher.” Emma whisper-yells, sounding a bit winded by the time she closes her mouth because she really didn’t stop to breathe once in between words.

“What?” Kevin stumbles back as Emma’s words hit him like a brick wall, trying to make sense of that.

“Alyssa and I have been sleeping together,” she repeats slower, eyes wide and a bit frantic. “That’s exactly what you heard, Kevin. Alyssa, my best friend Alyssa, your best friend Alyssa, and I. We’ve been bonking. Getting it on. Banging. F-”

“Okay, I get it!” Kevin squeaks high-pitched before Emma can keep going. “For how-”

“Since Nick’s wedding.”

“But that was-”

“Four months ago. Yes, I know.”

“And you’re only now freaking out?” Kevin is almost impressed that he managed to get a complete sentence out this time.

“No! Yes. I mean - I’m not. Maybe?”

Kevin nods sagely. “Yeah, that makes sense.”

Emma shakes her head, looking frantic again when she grabs onto Kevin’s shoulders and pulls him closer. “No, Kevin. It does not.”

Kevin sighs, grabbing Emma's hands from his shoulders and using the opportunity to steer them both to the couch lest she starts pacing again.

“I don’t get it,” he says when Emma sags against the cushions.

Emma scoffs, half annoyed. “Well, Kevin. When two women t-”

“No,” he sends a glare in her direction. “The sleeping together I get. Why are you freaking out?”

“Because!” Emma says as she throws her hands up in frustration, missing Kevin’s nose by a miracle. “Did you even hear what I said?” She doesn’t give him a chance to answer. “Because I’m dumb. I'm so dumb that I had to go and fall in love with her when everything was going so well. Now I have to break things off with her, and then I’m going to lose her and probablyy have to move to Canada because I’m just so dumb.”

His jaw drops comically at her rambling. Emma has the sudden urge to slap him.

“I’m so dumb, Kev,” she repeats with less heat this time, souding almost defeated.

With a shake of his head Kevin manages to half snap himself out of it because that’s a lot to process. He tells her as much.

“C’mon, Emma. You’re not dumb,” he says weakly when she glares at him again.

“Really?” She challenges, an eyebrow quirked. “How many people have you slept with? - Rhetorical question, don’t answer that.- The point is, I don’t see you falling in love with any of them.”

“Well,” Kevins manages to say after a moment, “I’ve never slept with any of my best friends. Maybe that’s the difference.”

“I… Fuck.” Emma sighs again, her head dropping for a second before she looks up to stare at the ceiling and wishes for some divine intervention or some stroke of sudden inspiration to help her figure out what she should do. She frowns. There’s also a really big cobweb in the corner; they should get Nick to deal with that.

“You're really in love with Alyssa, huh?” Kevin asks when it’s clear Emma isn’t going to say anything else.

“Yes.” It’s the simple answer, the short version of it because Emma doesn’t feel like telling him how much she misses Alyssa when they don’t see each other. She doesn't want to say how much time she spends just thinking of her, or explain how a simple text from her can make Emma’s day suddenly brighter.

He'll probably call her an idiot if she mentions how she spends half an hour staring at this painting in the meeting room at work instead of paying attention because the hues of brown reminds her of Alyssa’s eyes and shit, she’s in so deep. How did it take her this long to realize how bad it was?

“Maybe you should just tell her,” Kevin offers gently.

Emma snorts a burst of humorless laughter. “As if. Even I am not that stupid.”

He shrugs again. “I don’t know then. Have you thought that maybe you’re not really in love with her? Maybe you’re just confused.”

The noise she makes when she chokes on nothing is worrisome. “Wow,” Emma says when she finally feels like she can breathe again, pushing Kevin’s hand where he’s slapping her back weakly. “You sound just like my father. It feels like I’m fourteen all over again. Are you going to kick me out, too?”

“No!” Kevin gasps, looking aghast. It’s enough to almost make Emma smile. “You know I didn’t mean it like that. More like, the two of you are very close friends that are having sex, and since you’re having sex you just maybe started seeing your friendly interactions as romantic, too?”

“Huh,” Emma turns to him with a pensive look. “You just said something very smart, Kev.”

He perks up. “Thanks, I just came with it on the spot.”

Emma nods, still looking at him. “Yeah, so what you’re saying is that if I avoid Alyssa for a little while then it’ll go away and I’ll see that I was just confused."

Kevin frowns. “That is absolutely not what I said.”

“What would you do?” Emma asks, going back to looking frustrated.

“I don’t think that’s the advice you want.”

“You would just sleep around, wouldn’t you?”

“Yep,” Kevin nods, popping the p.

Emma’s eyes find the cobweb in the corner of their ceiling again. “I don’t wanna do that.”

“I know.”

Kevin takes pity at the small defeated sigh Emma lets out then, scooting closer on the couch until he can hug her with one arm, her head resting on his shoulder without her really thinking about it.

“Thanks, Kev. For being a good friend.” She says after a few minutes of comfortable silence.

“You’re welcome,” Kevin places a gentle kiss on the top of her head. “I do have a question, though.”

“Shoot.”

“All those times Alyssa was here cleaning your room, the two of you were…?”

“Yep.”

“And that time with the-”

“Yep,” Emma hides her face further in his shoulder.

“And -”

“Okay, no more questions, Kevin.”

 


 

So, yes. Emma tries to avoid Alyssa.

It doesn’t work out, but even Kevin could have told her that it wouldn’t. In fact, he did. Several times.

But yeah, it doesn’t work. Firstly, because they literally live five feet from each other, have the same friends, and frequent the same places. But also because Emma doesn’t really want to, doesn’t even put any effort in it, to be honest. So yes, she doesn’t last a whole day.

“Hey,” Alyssa says, looking up from her laptop at the dining table when Emma walks in with a sheepish smile.

“Hi,” Emma says timidly, her hand rubbing the back of her neck embarrassedly and not moving from where she’s still standing at the door, half a foot in.

Alyssa’s eyes glint with amusement at the scene. Emma has never had any qualms in barging into her place before.

“Are you going to come on in or are you going to stay blocking the door the whole night?”

“Right,” Emma nods, taking a stiff step in and closing the door behind herself. She seems to consider it for a moment before slowly making her way over and taking a seat in front of Alyssa. “Um, how have you been?”

“Good,” Alyssa says with a smile. “Are you done avoiding me now?”

She watches with an arched eyebrow as Emma’s face goes through several emotions at once, mostly panic and embarrassment at being caught, insecurity and anxiety. There's something else on her face that Alyssa can’t quite identify, which is weird. Alyssa had become a professional at reading Emma Nolan a long time ago.

Emma scoffs unconvincingly. “I- I wasn’t - I wasn’t avoiding you,” she manages to sputter. Alyssa’s arched eyebrow doesn’t come down, waiting until Emma deflates and rolls her eyes. “Yeah, even I don’t believe that.”

Maybe she also shouldn’t have jumped behind the couch when Alyssa stopped by the apartment earlier that day. And she definitely shouldn’t have asked Kevin to tell Alyssa she wasn’t home, too.

Alyssa’s eyes soften then, as they often do when she’s with Emma, and she reaches for one of her hands on top of the table, grasping it lightly in case Emma wants to pull away.

“Are you okay?”

“I am now,” Emma smiles, and Alyssa believes it when their eyes meet.

“Are we?”

“We are.”

“Are you going to tell me what happened?”

And that’s the question, huh. Emma hadn’t decided, or better yet, she hadn’t found out how to do that. Between spending the whole day yesterday panicking and then avoiding Alyssa today, she still didn’t know just what to say. She doesn’t want to tell the truth and lose her, but then again, she never managed to successfully tell a lie to Alyssa, and this was a big secret she wasn’t too willing to keep.

There’s also that small part of her that she keeps trying to stifle, that's saying maybe this won’t end in disaster if she tries.

Emma sighs, closing her eyes and for once deciding to shut her brain off. She takes a deep breath, holding it in for a moment and feeling herself calm down as the smell of Alyssa’s shampoo fills her lungs.

“Okay,” she says finally, standing up from her chair and walking over to where Alyssa’s still seated. “Can I try something?” She looks down at Alyssa, vulnerable and unsure.

Alyssa’s smile is reassuring in contrast as she takes Emma’s hand and lets herself be pulled up.

“Whatever you need.”

She can see it when the confusion in Emma’s eyes softens into something else more certain, her gaze dropping down to her lips. She can feel her heartbeat quickening when one of Emma's hands comes up to gently cup her cheek.

Slowly, so very slowly, Emma tilts her head until her forehead is resting against Alyssa’s for a brief moment before their lips finally meet in a kiss.

Emma’s lips are warm and soft as she kisses Alyssa without a rush. Her eyes drift closed of their own accord, her hand finding its place on the back of Emma’s neck before she even registers the action. She pulls her impossibly closer then, neither of them trying to hurry the kiss, content with how their mouths slowly move together.

Over the past few months, Alyssa had shared countless kisses with Emma. Some incredibly hot and eager that she could feel all the way down to her toes; could make her burn with want and heat pool low on the pit of her stomach.

Other kisses were softer, tender, like in the mornings when they would wake up pressed together and she couldn’t help but kiss Emma even if it didn’t lead nowhere else.

Some were rushed and sweet, like when one of them had to leave to their own place but not before stealing one last kiss, but none of them had ever felt like this one.

Not in the way it mutes all of Alyssa’s thoughts or how it makes her whole body shiver with a different kind of want, not the tear-each-other’s-clothes kind of way.

It’s all about Emma, and how she leans forward and tries to press closer closer closer as if she would just stop breathing if she didn’t. How it tugs at something in the back of her mind like if she just thought a bit harder she could unlock all the secrets of the universe.

It’s that kind of kiss.

“Wow,” Alyssa whispers against Emma’s lips when she pulls away. Though she keeps her eyes closed because this feels like a dream, and if it is, then maybe she can make it last a little longer if she doesn’t open them.

“Yeah,” Emma agrees breathlessly.

Alyssa hums, sympathizing with the feeling but unable to form the words.

She can feel it when their feet start moving, though she’s unsure if she’s pulling Emma with her as she goes or if she’s purposefully being pushed. It doesn’t really matter.

Emma’s arms flail around for a moment when Alyssa pushes her against the closed bedroom door. When she’s steady though, she doesn’t waste a moment before wrapping her arms around Alyssa and pulling her closer until there’s no space between them, the butterflies are running rampant in her stomach.

When they pull away to breathe again, Emma is breathing hard as she looks down at Alyssa, keeping her close with both arms still around her. There’s a strange look in her eyes that stirs something vaguely familiar inside Alyssa; she doesn’t have the time to decipher what that is right now. She kisses Emma instead.

Emma takes a harsh breath when Alyssa abruptly breaks the kiss again to take a step back and survey the disheveled state she has left Emma in.

“God,” Emma says when she opens her eyes to find Alyssa already staring at her. She has her bottom lip between her teeth, looking at Emma up and down in a way that makes her feel like there’s electricity coursing through her body.

Emma closes her eyes again.

 


 

“Alyssa,” Emma murmurs in her ear later when they’re both tangled together in a mess of limbs and too spent to even think about moving.

Alyssa hums in answer, too warm and cozy to try and come up with something else that requires words.

“Can we talk?”

She doesn’t really register Emma’s words or the tone of her voice, humming again instead of answering her. It feels hazy, like a dream, and in the back of her mind, she thinks about asking Emma to repeat what she has said. A small part of her is aware that it feels like this is important, but before she knows it, she’s already drifting off to sleep, too spent and comfortable to even think about fighting it.

 


 

Alyssa wakes up to soft morning light streaming in, bathing the room in a yellowish glow where she forgot to pull the blinds close last night. There’s the warm feeling of a hand running through her hair, Alyssa smiles lazily, finally opening her eyes to find Emma’s, snuggling further in their shared warmth.

Emma smiles. “Morning.”

“Hi,” Alyssa rasps, one hand coming up to take Emma’s and lace their fingers together.

“I have to go, but you can go back to sleep. I-” she pauses for a second, and Alyssa takes a moment to just look at her. Emma isn’t wearing her glasses and her hair is sticking up in various directions on one side, while the other is flat. It’s kind of adorable.

“Okay,” Alyssa mumbles, already falling asleep again though she still catches Emma’s small grin when she bows her head to press a kiss on her forehead.

“I’ll see you later?” Emma disentangles their fingers as she finds her glasses on the nightstand.

“Yeah,” Alyssa nods, watching as Emma chews thoughtfully on her bottom lip, finally shaking her head and making her way to the bedroom door. She peeks outside once before leaving to check that she isn’t going to run into Shelby.

Emma’s pillow still smells like her, and Alyssa finds herself burying her nose in it as she hugs it tightly to her chest before even noticing what she’s doing.

 


 

Shelby watches Alyssa’s eyes narrow as she keeps stealing glances at Emma on the other side of the coffeehouse. She follows her line of sight to find Emma leaning casually against the counter, waiting as Trent fusses around to get their orders ready.

It’s a familiar sight because let’s face it, they spent too much of their free time here anyway. The difference, however, is the woman mimicking Emma’s position against the counter, leaning just a bit too close to her for it to be casual while chatting animatedly.

“Do you think that’s her?” Kaylee asks in a loud whisper, and Shelby finally takes her eyes off the scene to look at her instead.

“Who?”

“The secret girlfriend.” The duh is left unspoken.

Shelby hums, looking from Emma to Alyssa, whose eyes are still glaring at Emma and not paying attention to their conversation. “I don't know. What do you think, Alyssa?”

It takes a moment for her to grudgingly turn her attention away from Emma and look at Shelby. “What?”

“Kaylee asked if you think that’s Emma's secret girlfriend.”

Alyssa scoffs, “as if.”

Shelby arches an eyebrow, smirking smugly, and only then does Alyssa catch what she just said.

“Ooh, I’m sorry. I forgot you already know all about Emma’s love life.”

There’s something in the tone of her voice as she says it that almost makes Alyssa want to confront Shelby and make her say what she means because Alyssa honestly has no clue.

“Emma has game,” Kaylee says distractedly, pulling Alyssa and Shelby from their staring match and making them both look back over to the counter.

Emma and the girl are still talking, though the stranger has gotten bolder now, leaning even closer while one hand lazily runs twirls her own hair.

Alyssa can admit this woman is pretty. Sort of. She looks like she’s one of those people that are always a little annoying anyway. Emma doesn’t seem to be thinking so, however, as she smiles broadly at whatever they're talking about.

A second later the woman is throwing her head back in laughter, grabbing one of Emma’s arms to keep herself upright. Alyssa scoffs under her breath; Emma is not even that funny. And she would know, she is usually the only one that laughs at Emma’s cheesy jokes.

Okay, that’s unfair. Alyssa actually loves all of Emma’s jokes.

She narrows her eyes again.

Emma has a weird look on her face as the woman grabs a napkin and steals one of Trent’s pens to write something down before handing it to her. She says something else, squeezing Emma’s arms one last time and honest to God winking at her before grabbing her cup of coffee and making her way out. Alyssa watches Emma stare down at the napkin in her hand, though she quickly avoids her gaze when Emma looks in her direction.

Shelby hums, that stupid smirk still on her lips. “Interesting.”

Alyssa wants to smack her.

It would surely be easier than dealing with how she’s feeling right now because it looks like maybe she's jealous, and that doesn’t even make sense!

She’s distracted from her line of thought when Emma sits down next to her again, pressing a plate onto her hands and Alyssa looks up to find Shelby already staring at them, grinning infuriatingly.

“So…” Shelby starts slowly. Alyssa knows nothing good is coming when she gets that tone of voice. “Emma, tell us. What was that?”

“Huh?” Emma asks distractedly. As if she doesn’t know what Shelby is getting at.

“I was just telling Alyssa that I thought that girl was really pretty.”

Emma steals a quick glance in Alyssa’s direction before shifting her attention back to Shelby and then to the coffee in her hands. “What?”

“Oh, c’mon,” Kaylee snaps, exasperatedly sitting up in the armchair and leaning forward slightly. “We all just saw what just happened.”

“You mean at the counter?”

Shelby rolls her eyes. “What else would we be talking about?”

Emma shrugs. “That was nothing.” She holds out the napkin for Shelby to see, not caring that it’s almost crumpled into a small ball by this point. Alyssa can feel something loosening in her chest, finally allowing herself to relax again.

“You’re not going to call her?” Kaylee actually sounds a little impressed. “Wow, things with your mystery girlfriend must be getting serious.”

Alyssa leans forward then, curious about how Emma will answer that.

Emma just rolls her eyes. “Nope. I’m just not interested.”

“Interesting,” Shelby repeats, picking up the napkin and looking it over for a moment. Emma doesn’t care, just fishes her phone from her pocket as she gets up from her seat.

“Yeah. I'm sure my love life is incredibly interesting to you, Gonzales, but unfortunately, I have to go. So.”

Shelby perks up again. “Oh, gonna go meet your secret girlfriend?”

Emma snorts a laugh. “Seriously, why are you so invested in this? Don’t tell me you got a crush on me? I thought we were past that phase.”

Shelby scoffs. “As much as I know you love me, I’ve already told you you’re not my type, Nolan.”

Kaylee snickers at that, and Alyssa briefly wonders why her friends are like this.

“Right,” Emma says, walking past Shelby to get to the front door. “If you must know, I simply have dinner plans with Barry and Angie. Not a hot date, sorry to disappoint.”

Kaylee puts one arm out to block Emma’s way when she gets closer to her. "Wait, before you go, can you take a look at this?” She doesn’t wait for an answer as she shoves her phone on Emma’s face without warning. “How about this one?”

It takes a few moments until Emma can focus on the picture Kaylee is showing her. It’s an Instagram profile picture, a beautiful brunette smiling at the camera that Emma has, without a doubt, never seen in her life. She lets the confusion show on her face.

“What?”

Kaylee arches an eyebrow, exchanging a look with Shelby. “Tell me if I’m mistaken, but I’m pretty sure this is your secret girlfriend.”

Alyssa can see it when Emma screws her eyes shut, probably asking God for patience.

“This is getting out of hand,” she says at last. Kaylee hums in acknowledgment.

“I’ll take that as a no.” And then she’s back to vigorously scrolling through her phone.

Emma growls, head tilted to one side like a dog as she stares curiously. “Where did you even find this girl anyway?”

Her phone is abandoned when Kaylee looks back at Emma, smirk still firmly in place. “Wouldn’t you like to know?”

“No?”

The grin on Kaylee’s face stretches. “Is that because you’re so in love with this girl that you don’t even wanna look at other girls?”

Emma blushes a bright red, forcing her eyes to stay on Kaylee instead of Alyssa like she wants to.

“Wha - hm - I... This doesn't - I mean- what?”

Shelby doesn’t bother to hide her laughter as she stretches forward to pat Emma on the back. “I think you broke her, Kay.”

“I found her on your Instagram, by the way,” Kaylee says, ignoring them both. “She started following you about two months ago and has liked all of the videos you posted and the picture of the chick wearing that tux. I really thought she was a strong candidate.”

“Did you stalk all of my followers?”

It’s not like that would be hard. Emma doesn't have that many followers anyway. Though every once in a while, when she posted a new video playing something or singing, she would get some new followers from out of nowhere. That reminds her that she has a new song she wants to post.

Kaylee looks at her as if she’s gone crazy. “Of course not. Only the ones that look like they might be into girls. To be fair that's quite a lot, there are you have a lot of lesbians and bisexual girls following you. ”

Emma shrugs, defeated. That’s better than last week when she was looking for “potential candidates” on her Linkedin page. Pam from accounting was kind of cute but also married with two children and about fifteen years older than Emma.

“Don’t you have anything else to do with your free time? A hobby maybe?”

Kaylee shrugs. “I took Shelby to the aquarium just last week.”

Emma huffs in annoyance, trying to get away once again, but Shelby stops her this time.

“Wait,” she says, waving the napkin with the woman’s name and number for Emma to see. “Are you sure you don’t want this?”

This time, Emma doesn’t stop herself from stealing a quick look at Alyssa. “I’m pretty sure. You can keep it for yourself if you really want to.”

“Maybe I will. She was cute.”

Emma shrugs, and with a hand wave in their general direction she’s gone and Alyssa is left to glare at Shelby.

“What was that for?”

“Yeah,” Kaylee agrees with a scowl, snatching the paper from Shelby’s hand and crumpling it in her hand. “What the hell was that?”

Shelby shrugs, smiling placatingly at Kaylee. “I was curious.”

“Emma already said she didn’t want it.”

“Yeah,” Shelby smirks, scooting closer to Alyssa and lowering her voice so that only she can hear it when she says “careful there, or it might sound like you’re jealous.”

Alyssa scoffs even as she feels her cheeks heating up at being caught. “You’re delirious.”

“Right,” Shelby says, pushing herself up from her seat and walking over to Kaylee to offer her a hand. She hums an unfamiliar melody under her breath as she passes her and Alyssa narrows her eyes. “... eso es amor…” she sings distractedly, eyes glinting with amusement.

“What?”

“Nothing. We have to go too. Make good use of the peace and quiet. It looks like you might need to think about it.”

“What?” Alyssa repeats to no one in particular. The guy walking past her to take the seat Kaylee vacated shrugs.

 


 

Alyssa doesn’t get a chance to talk about it with Emma. Not until a few days later.

She’s a bit weirded out when she walks home after work to find all the lights off, though she can hear the muffled sounds of the TV as she quietly closes the door behind herself. She stops in her tracks when she reaches the living room and stares at the scene.

Emma is sandwiched on the couch between Kaylee and Kevin, with Kaylee resting her head on Emma’s shoulder and their hands laced together and Kevin’s arms around them. On the floor, Shelby is leaning against Kaylee’s legs with Nick lying down on the floor with his head on Shelby’s lap.

Her friends might be idiots, but at times like these, they look almost cute.

Alyssa is not really paying attention to what they’re watching, but she’s pretty sure this is more for Nick’s sake than anything else. She knows he has been a little needier than usual these past few days since Melissa has been visiting her parents and he couldn’t go too because of work, but this is just ridiculous.

“Hey guys,” she says in the silence of the room. Several things happen at once.

Shelby's startled yelp dislodges Nick from his position as she slaps him hard once in the face in her panic. Kaylee’s frightened shriek sets off Kevin, who instinctively jumps up from the couch, forgetting he is holding the popcorn bowl and letting it go on top of Shelby and Nick on the floor.

Emma, looking paler than usual, has a hand on her chest as if physically holding herself back from a heart attack.

Alyssa, for once, is glad she never got around to learning Spanish because the words Shelby is throwing at her don’t sound like compliments.

“What the actual fuck, Alyssa,” she says in English.

“Shit,” Kaylee and Emma say at the same time before Kaylee turns around to glare at Alyssa.

Everyone is suddenly set in motion then, as they talk over each other making it impossible for Alyssa to even begin to understand what is happening.

“Stop!” She yells, holding one hand up while the other rubs at her temple. “What is going on?”

“What happened is that you almost gave us a heart attack while we're watching this scary as hell show Nick insisted on.” Shelby is the one to speak, her glare enough to make Alyssa want to take a step back.

Emma snorts a laugh, “c’mon. It’s not even that scary.”

Kaylee doesn't waste a moment before she's scoffing and shoving Emma away. “Really, because I distinctly remember you almost breaking my fingers when that ghost showed up.

“I was just annoyed that Kevin wouldn’t stop crying.”

Kevin looks offended but barely tries to defend himself. “The ghost wasn’t even bad; he was just sad and trapped and-” He cuts himself off, sounding two seconds away from crying. He takes a deep breath, looking at Alyssa with eyes full of tears. “He didn’t deserve that.”

Alyssa sighs.

In the end, this is how she ends up occupying Kevin’s place on the couch, pressed against Emma as they restart the show from the first episode so she can catch up. Kevin takes the space next to Nick on the floor; Alyssa can see them holding hands.

 


 

Kevin had a point. That ghost really didn’t deserve that.

 


 

Later, before everyone leaves, Emma offers to stay and help Alyssa clean. She knows her, and Alyssa would never leave the mess to be dealt with in the morning even if tomorrow is Saturday and she has the day off.

No one complains because yeah, they weren’t about to offer to help (note to self, find better friends.) Shelby sends Alyssa a pointed look before closing the door on her way out; she still has no idea what it means.

The kitchen is the worse, especially since Nick had been in charge of the snacks tonight and Emma stares at it unfocused and unsure of where to even begin. Her eyes land on the box of orange juice on top of the table reminding her of the bottle Alyssa keeps hidden on the fridge for "special occasions" and it’s like a lightbulb is going off in her head.

“So,” she starts, turning on her heels to find where Alyssa is trying to free popcorn from the rug. “We could clean it all up right now or-” she stops until Alyssa’s attention is on her, with the way she’s half-smiling Emma knows she has a good chance of winning this one. “We could just let it be for a little longer while I make us some mimosas?”

She smiles as she waits, watching Alyssa debate it for a moment before pushing herself up and grabbing her phone.

“I like how you think,” she says. With a few flicks of her finger on the phone, she has music filling the apartment, Emma pumping one hand up in celebration.

She, like the others, doesn’t like the cleaning part as much as the having fun part. Though she at least would feel bad if she didn’t offer to help. Even if Alyssa does like the cleaning part. “Yes!” Task put off successfully.

She gets a little derailed on the task of making the mimosas, however. A carefree Alyssa dancing around the living room is far more attractive than the promise of alcohol, and it’s hard for Emma to hold back the smile on her face as she watches. Before long their arms are wrapping around each other as they move together to the sound of some pop song Emma vaguely recognizes. She playfully twirls Alyssa every once in a while, holding her close every time they’re face to face again, grinning at each other just because.

And yeah, maybe Emma’s work sucked more than usual today. There’s a reminder on Alyssa’s phone to call her mom that she’s been ignoring for a few days at least. Still, in this moment, it’s easy to ignore everything else and only focus on this.

 


 

Kaylee and Shelby watch as Nick climbs into his Lyft, eager to go back to his empty home and hug Melissa’s pillow or something equally sappy. He’s dumb like that, refusing Kevin’s offer to stay over and mentioning something about picking Melissa from the airport, which they all know is just an excuse.

They wait until he waves goodbye before Kaylee unlocks her door. He was nice enough to walk the few blocks with them to her place, but as much as he and Kaylee talked during their walk, Shelby hadn’t been able to really pay attention to them. Something else burning in the back of her mind.

She likes the comfortable silence she and Kaylee settle into as soon as they make their way inside and wander into the bedroom to change into their pajamas, though it doesn’t last as long as she wishes it would because soon enough Kevin is calling one of their phones, probably to make sure they made it back safely.

“Kevin,” Shelby starts slowly before he can even say something, taking the phone from Kaylee’s hand and quickly switching the call to facetime.

“Yes?”

“You live with Emma.”

“Huh?”

“I know you know who Emma’s girlfriend is,” she tells him, putting on a glare just because she knows she can scare him like that.

The silence that follows is as telling as if Kevin had confirmed it out loud. Shelby's grin is evil, like a Disney villain.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he says too fast.

He's an incredibly bad liar for someone that supposedly earns their livelihood acting.

“There’s no point denying it, I know you know. You live with Emma.”

Kevin scoffs. “Yeah, well. You live with Alyssa.”

Shelby can see it on Kevin’s face when his words sink in. He drops the phone, but she can still hear it when he slaps a hand over his mouth and his whispered “oh no.”

“I knew it!” She jumps triumphantly, quickly calming down when Kaylee levels her with a look.

“What?” She asks, tugging on Shelby’s sleeves until she’s sitting beside her again so she can press their faces closer until they both fit on the camera.

“Kevin knows!”

“No!” Kevin yells on the other side of the line. “Kevin doesn’t know anything! Who’s a Kevin? I don’t know any Kevin. My name is Keith.”

Shelby smirks at Kaylee then, before holding the phone closer to her face and lowering her voice, making her words sound almost like a threat. “Kevin.”

She can hear it when he gulps and watches as he picks the phone from the floor, looking almost constipated as he stares at them. “I can’t say anything. I promised Emma!” He’s whining, which Shelby takes as a good sign; it means he’ll cave soon.

"Just tell me what you know. I promise I won't be mad at you, Kev."

He hangs up.

It takes only three tries before he picks up the call again.

“It’s okay, Kev. I already know,” she says as soon as Kevin’s face shows up on the screen.

“Did Alyssa tell you?”

“Eh, something like that.”

Kevin sighs. "Okay."

“So, you know, and I know, and now Kaylee knows, too. That’s three of us. We can make them pay for thinking they could keep boldly lying to our faces every day!”

“I don't get it,” Kaylee stops Shelby's villain monologue, pulling back to stare at her in confusion and then Kevin.

“Have you not- Nevermind. Alyssa and Emma are banging. They’re each other’s secret girlfriends.”

Kaylee furrows her brow, her lips pursing as she thinks it over, “I didn’t know Alyssa had a secret girlfriend, too.”

Shelby’s eyes widen, “did I forget to tell you about it?” She pouts when Kaylee slaps her on the shoulder.

“Those sneaky little-”

“I know!” Shelby grins manically. “And they don’t even know we know, they think they’re so clever, but we’re cleverer.” She frowns “We’re smarter?”

“Wait,” Kavin interrupts again, his eyes narrowed. “What do you mean they don’t know we know? I thought Alyssa had told you.”

Shelby waves a dismissive hand. “Don’t worry about it, Kev. Now add Nick to the call, we’re gonna need his help too.”

Kevin sighs again. He still does as told anyway.

Notes:

by now it's pretty obvious i had no idea where i was going with this story when i started it.

also, i realized it’s been almost two years since i started this fic and i just wanted to thank anyone that might still be reading it <3. next chapter is probably going to be the last one and hopefully won’t take as long to get done.