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It’s 1991.
Aziraphale heard someone entering his bookshop. Since that day began he had a feeling that might happen. He usually doesn’t like that sound; it only means that soon he’ll have to deal with telling people off, but that one is different and he feels it. He feels the sadness, the fury, the disbelief. Hurt. It stinks of someone hurting. He isn’t really familiar with that, doesn’t know how to console a person who just lost something dear to them, but nevertheless he’s as happy as one in this situation can be, mainly because it means he chose not to be alone. Crowley walks in, his shoulders slumped, his posture just a little bit off, face framed with familiar sunglasses, shielding him from the world.
„Crowley, I’m..” started Aziraphale, but was quickly interrupted. „Did you hear the news?” There was a moment of silence, just a tiny tiny moment before Aziraphale responded „Yes. Yes dear, I’m afraid so.” Crowley sighed and took off his glasses. Aziraphale couldnt remember when was the last time he saw his eyes bare like this. As Crowley sat on the couch, his movements slow and tired, the angel managed to get his finest wine and pour it into glasses. He gave the demon one of them and quietly sat next to him and watched him drinking the wine so fast he nearly choked. He figured the glasses are useless, pouring the wine would be a simple waste of Energy so he miracled a second bottle and just gave it to Crowley.
They sat, drinking, for a long time. Or short. The passage of time was something neither of them considered worth noticing – after all they had it plenty. „Crowley, dear. You are allowed to grieve, you know that?”, Aziraphale decided to speak.
„Don’t.”, came a simple, hard answer.
„What do you need, then?”
Crowley turned to him, eyes lost. „I am not sure, angel”, his voice shook a little. Aziraphale suddenly hated the way it all works, human lives. Such fragile things yet so brave in their existense. He took Crowley’s hand that was laying on his lap and intertwined their fingers. Turns out his voice wasn’t the only thing that was shaking. Crowley squeezed harder. Aziraphale could swear he saw the demons eyes get a bit wet.
„Have you ever met him?”, he decided to ask.
„Oh yes. Once. Not counting the concerts of course”, answered Crowley. „We met at some awful, awful club. He looked lost, i was bored, so i decided to mess with him a bit. Even took him to a private room.”
„I know you want to tell me everything, but please spare me the details”, the angel was suddenly blushing. Good thing that Crowley didn’t look at him then. Seems like his eyes were reliving the past.
„Oh angel, it wasn’t like that at all.. I was shitfaced, he was lonely – we talked. All night long. Singing wasn’t the only thing he was good at, you know. He was a pretty good listener too. I mean who could sit there fully focused and listen to me rambling about almost 6000 years of stuff”, he looked at Aziraphale and added „besides you, naturally.”
„He listened to every word i said. We laughed. He cried. Demons dont give hugs, you know, i had to sent a note to hell that i tried to strangle him”, he laughed bitterly. „He gave me a note, here, I still have it”, he took a piece of paper from his jacket with his free hand and gave it to Aziraphale, who took it carefully. It was still folded, so he asked „Can i read it?” Crowley just nodded, so he finally unfolded it.
„If you ever want to pour your heart out again darling, call me. Freddie.”, it said. Underneath it was a phone number.
„When he was writing that i told him that demons don’t have hearts”, he smiled fondly. „He just said that i must be pretty bad at my job then.” The angel took his second hand, feeling something inside him breaking a little. „Oh, Crowley… It must be truly awful to..”
„Angel, before you say anything, I didn’t tempt him. At all. Never.”, said the demon without any heat in his voice. „I called from time to time. We talked for hours. He always laughed I’m that little devil on his shoulder, only nicer. Went to every concert since then. Mainly for the music, have you heard these songs? Masterpieces.”, trailed off Crowley.
„Yes I’ve heard a few. Not really a fan but I recognise a talent when i see it. Or hear, in that case. And he without a doubt was very talented.”, said the angel quietly.
„Yes..”, now the demon was looking straight into the angel’s eyes, „I was there. When he was leaving. Pretty sure his soul saw me, cause he smiled and tapped at his shoulder. I don’t know where he went, I hope It’s heaven, though I’d never talk with him again. He doesn’t deserve anything less”, his voice cracked at the last words.
Aziraphale noticed tears. He didn’t know demons could cry, but he also assumed they don’t make friends with humans, let alone angels. The world was strange. He released Crowley’s hands. „Come here, dear boy”, said and opened his arms. Crowley fell into him as if he didn’t have any air in his body left. His arms held angel’s waist tightly, hands placed on his back, face burrowed into his neck. A tiny, single sob went through his body. Aziraphale just held him like that, for a couple of minutes. That felt very human.
When they finally let go, Crowley sniffed. „It’s kinda funny, he would hate that kind of thing. Being sad.”
„I’m pretty sure he would forgive such a thing.”, Aziraphale smiled. So did Crowley. „I could check if he went to us. Maybe even could manage slipping him a little note.”
„Oh, so rebelious of you.”
„We both are a bit different from our usual appearances today, don’t you agree? Now, I want you to play me your favourite mr Mercury songs.”, said the angel, miracling another bottle of wine.
„Hmm.. i think you’re gonna love this one then.”