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How to Raise a Cactus: A Guide by Sylvain José Gautier

Summary:

Cacti are fickle things to take care of, but with enough care and attention you can raise one into a very handsome and loving boyfriend.

Notes:

I was booboo the fool…. I didn't even realize this was a ship at first and now I've fallen deep. I thought my first Three Houses fic would be M!Byleth/Dimitri, but that looks like it's going to be another long ass fic because I don't know how to shut the fuck up. This is going to be some vaguely connecting one shot drabble things about a growing relationship because I'm soft for soft things if it goes as planned. Might be a little ooc since I feel I never capture characters right. Also I'm slow in the game so some things might be wrong from cannon I just want to explore the church for 6 hours and drink tea with linhardt each month ok listen.

characters and tags will be added and updated once more chapters are uploaded

T rating currently for: Language, small mention blood

Chapter 1: Step 1

Chapter Text

Step 1: If harvesting seeds from cactus pods, gather the pods.

Dedue was a man of few words, but that just made him interesting to talk to whenever he did speak more than one sentence that didn't include something about Dimitri. Cooking was one of the topics they shared a couple of conversations on, mostly consisting of the taller man begrudgingly teaching him some recipes that he boasted about showing off to some babes, but in the end he could tell the man from Duscar was having fun in his own way too. No, he hasn't gotten to show off his cooking skills yet, but that was okay with Sylvain. He'll get there eventually. It was good to have the experience under his belt. 

He's learned another hobby of Dedue’s in almost the same vain he did cooking: Girls loved flowers so he was going to give some to his new interests. He's heard from Byleth that he likes to assign him weeding duty since he has such an interest in gardening and it makes him happy. It didn't take long for him to conclude that it also translated to flowers. 

Just his luck he was able to find the man, the myth, the legend himself in the greenhouse and immediately he put on a charming smile. 

Dedue heard his footsteps approaching from behind and stood from where he was, turning around with a flower pot in hand to see who was coming forward. 

“Hey De- woah what is that?” Sylvain asked, dropping his smile to replace his expression with wonder as he looked down at the potted plant. “Looks like a chub-”

“Please, do not touch it.” Dedue took a small step back to prevent him from getting poked. “It has spines.”

“Huh?” He did pull his hand back to himself, but Sylvain still stepped forward and crouched down to get a better look at the little hairs coming from the small green ball. “It looks more like fuzz to me.” But if Dedue didn't want him to touch it in the first place, who was he to argue? “Anyway, what is it?”

“It's a plant native to Brigid: A cactus. I am taking care of it with the help of Petra. She came across a few seeds a while ago and asked me for gardening help.”

Sylvain gave a chuckle, arms going behind his head as he watched him stare down fondly at the cactus. “I can't expect any less.” Helping others and gardening is what he does best- somehow put cooking and Dimitri in there too and he'd become the happiest person alive he bet. 

"What do you mean?” Dedue asked, a slight tilt of his head, but all he got in response to that question was a shake of Sylvain's own before he moved on. 

“Well, I was going to ask you what flowers have the meaning of love to give to cute girls, but I want to learn more about this little guy.” He couldn't believe a little ball like that could be so dangerous. It looked so cute and innocent, and maybe a little phallic, but protective of itself. Besides, maybe having an interest in this plant could give him another chance to talk with Petra. “Is it just a cactus or like… a special kind of cactus?” Maybe there were different species like fish?

Dedue looked back at the red haired student, noticing the sincerity in his eyes which convinced him to start the little lesson. “This is called a prickly pear. Right now it needs more sunlight…” 

Together they spent all day in the greenhouse, Dedue teaching Sylvain all he learned about the cactus from Petra and his own research. The lesson had to come to an end when Sylvain noticed the time and had to get going. He was a few minutes late to his promised dinner with Felix, but he was able to curb his huffy, prickly attitude with a good meal and some fun facts about the plant. He didn't seem too interested, but that was probably because he missed the faint smile Felix had whenever he looked away.