Chapter Text
It’s good that Bucky’s back. It really is. It’s put a smile on Steve’s face and unknotted all the tension that’s left Tony at a loss since the downfall of SHIELD, since Steve fought his best friend. Well. Ex-lover, really. So yeah, it’s good that Bucky’s back, because Steve has an arm around him and he’s laughing and Tony, Tony hasn’t got that reaction from him in weeks.
It’s bad that Bucky’s back. It really is. Because he put Steve in the hospital, and Tony sat by him wondering how he’s supposed to love anyone if everyone, even Cap, is so fragile. Because Tony’s selfish, okay? He knows it. He wants Steve to be his (maybe even “to have and to hold until”, etc, but it’s too soon for that even if Tony wants everyone to know that Steve’s off-limits now) and he doesn’t want any chance of being left alone now that he seems to have got Steve to himself.
More than the hurting him, though, it’s that selfishness that makes it hard. Because there’s Steve laughing, Steve who talked about having multiple partners to fill different needs, Steve who doesn’t laugh like that with Tony. Steve with his arm around Bucky. Who maybe had sex with Bucky, is maybe even capable of wanting Bucky in a way he doesn’t want Tony, because if Tony’s learned anything from his research it’s that asexuality doesn’t necessarily mean that nobody can ever push Steve’s buttons.
So Tony thinks he knows what’s coming next, and it makes him feel sick.