Chapter Text
He was fifteen. Now, so was Eddie.
The two boys sat on the latter’s bed on the February winter evening of Eddie Kaspbrak’s fifteenth birthday, their backs up against the wall, Richie’s hand inching closer and closer to Eddie’s.
The whole Losers’ Club had their moment earlier that afternoon, the weekend date making it the perfect time for them all to pile into Bill’s backyard for a snowball fight, always Eddie’s favorite way to play outside because it didn’t involve getting dirty in any way, just cold. So cold that they had retreated into the Denbroughs’ house quickly for hot chocolate and marshmallows roasted haphazardly in the fireplace.
Richie had walked him home, because he always walked Eddie home, and just…hadn’t left. It was almost a tradition of there, mainly because Richie was always eager to spend more time with Eddie, and Eddie never wanted Richie to leave.
So Richie was currently working up the courage to hold Eddie’s hand. He’s had a crush on the boy since they were thirteen and he still hadn’t even held his fucking hand yet. Well, that was about to change because he was going to do it. He was going to do it even if it killed him. Which it wouldn’t, obviously, but it sure fucking felt like it might.
“Do you wanna’ get out of here one day?” Richie asked, even surprising himself.
Eddie scoffed. “If you’re bored you could’ve just said so, dickwad.”
“No, not like that,” Richie sighed, rolling his eyes. “I mean like...Derry. Don’t ya’ think about getting out of this shit stain of a town one day?”
Eddie was silent for a moment, staring at nothing but the photo strip on his bedside table from the Losers’ most recent trip to the arcade.
“I don’t know,” he admitted. And it was true. He really didn’t know what he wanted to do or where he wanted to go. “I guess it depends.”
“Depends on what? Look, how ‘bout this,” Richie said with a grin, turning his body to face Eddie’s, their knees bumping together. “If you could go anywhere in the world with anyone on Earth, where would you go? All expenses paid, instant travel time, all that bullshit.”
“Anywhere?” He asked, something in his eyes that made Richie’s hands twitch.
“Y-yeah,” he breathed shakily, their eyes not separating.
“Then California,” Eddie said confidently, not an ounce of uncertainty anywhere on his face. “I’d go to California...with you.”
Richie, for once in his goddamn life, was speechless. All he had planned on doing was holding Eddie’s fucking hand and now- now -his brain was practically screaming at him to just lean in and kiss him.
“Really?” He subconsciously mumbled, his heart in his throat.
But Eddie just smiled. Not his regular smile, but not a fake one either. Not the one he used when they watched his favorite movie, or even the one that graced his face when he let himself laugh at Richie’s jokes, but a different smile.
A smile that Richie never noticed until that moment, but he knew like the back of his hand.
The ‘Richie’ Smile.
The one only reserved for Richie’s eyes only.
“Alrighty then, Spaghetti,” Richie laughed lightly. “You and me on a greyhound to Los Angeles. Same day, same time, three years from now.”
Eddie rolled his eyes again, the smile not faltering for even a second. “Rich, we have to graduate first, you know that right? Because I’m not letting you drop out and I’m sure as hell not dropping out either.”
“Yeah, okay, fine,” Richie whined like it was the worst news he’d ever received in his life. “But the day after school’s out, we’re leaving this town in the dust.”
“Deal,” Eddie beamed, holding his hand out for Richie to shake.
Richie just stared at his hand for a moment, blinking at it as if it would disappear and he’d wake up with only the distant memory of a dream in his mind.
“Deal,” he whispered, slipping his hand into Eddie’s before pulling their hands towards him, effectively yanking Eddie forward enough for Richie to kiss him.
The smaller boy froze immediately, his shoulders tense and his lips unmoving, but within seconds he closed his eyes and relaxed, his other hand rising to grip the front of Richie’s sweatshirt by the drawstrings and pull himself even closer.
In the end, it was Richie who pulled away first. He was leaned back on his elbows, Eddie practically straddling his legs as his cherry red lips parted softly.
“California’s a good place to keep doing that shit,” Richie spoke breathily, still staring at Eddie like he couldn’t believe he was real. “If you’re still interested.”
Eddie couldn’t help but laugh, turning his hand in Richie’s to link their fingers together.
“Yeah, Rich,” he spoke exasperatedly, the fondest look of frustration on his face. “I’d say this is a pretty obvious sign I’m still interested.”
That seemed to be the right answer based on the look on Richie’s face.
“Good,” he grinned, grabbing Eddie’s hand tightly, rubbing his thumb over the other boy’s knuckles. “Good, we can…we can go to the same college! And we can share a dorm, or maybe even an apartment. We can be out in California too because they’re super fuckin’ chill over there apparently, and…we can be happy.”
Eddie leaned up and kissed him again, a smile threatening to break their lips apart, but they didn’t mind.
“As long as we’re both there. Or anywhere, it doesn’t even have to be California,” Eddie laughed, cupping Richie’s face in his hands. “I’d go anywhere with you. Even if we had to stay here in Derry, I’d stay with you.”
And maybe that was the reality check they needed.
That they weren’t really on the sunny shores of southern California, but instead in Derry, Maine.
Richie deflated a little, leaning a little into Eddie’s hands on his cheeks.
“Yeah…,” he said like it hurt him physically to even say it. “But what do we do for three years until then?”
Eddie just rolled his eyes and quickly kissed him again.
“This. Lots of this,” he answered cheekily. “Just because we can’t make out in the hallway at school like Greta Bowie and that guy on the wrestling team, doesn’t mean we can’t still be together. We’ll just be like Ben and Bev. Keep it private and only tell people we trust.”
“Do you think they’ll hate us? The other losers, I mean,” Richie asked, biting the inside of his cheek the way he always did when he was nervous. Eddie brushed his thumbs across the boy’s sharp cheekbones.
“I think they love us and we love them. And I think I can say for certain that they could never hate us for something like this,” Eddie promised him, scooting himself closer to Richie so he could lean his head on the taller boy’s shoulder. “Honestly, I feel like they won’t even be surprised.”
Richie snorted, wrapping an arm around Eddie’s shoulders.
“Oh, Stan definitely thinks we’re hooking up already. That time you fell asleep on your desk and bruised your neck with an eraser, he spent twenty minutes lecturing me for giving you a hickey,” Richie explained, Eddie mortified but laughing. “I was so confused, but I just made a joke about your mom and told him it wasn’t me.” He reached over to grab Eddie’s hand again. “He knows about me though. I told him when we were thirteen, I think. He knows I’m gay and he’s known about my…my crush on you ever since.”
Eddie sat up straighter, his eyes locking onto Richie’s.
“He doesn’t care?” He asked incredulously. “Even…even though…”
“That’s why he’s the best,” Richie answered, ruffling Eddie’s hair, much to the other’s fake annoyance. “After you, of course. Even if he did listen to me complain about how whipped I was for you throughout the past two years. Or at least pretended to listen.”
Eddie relaxed back into Richie’s side.
“I think we should tell them then,” Eddie spoke softly, wrapping his arms around Richie’s waist. “We’re all losers already, right? We’ve got nothing to lose.”
Richie kissed the crown of his head.
“Ain’t that the truth, Eddie Spaghetti,” Richie answered and Eddie immediately groaned.
“I don’t know why I thought kissing you would make you stop with the names, but I should’ve known,” he complained exasperatedly.
“You love it,” Richie countered, a knowing smirk on his face. “I always knew you didn’t hate it, but now I’m really sure.”
Eddie smacked his chest but didn’t stop cuddling him.
“I definitely don’t love it.”
“You do. Trust me, I can feel it in my bones.”
“Ew, Richie, that’s fucking gross. Stop talking about bones.”
“How ‘bout boners?”
Eddie grabbed a pillow from his bed and promptly smacked Richie in the face with it, the tall boy falling back against the mattress.
“I hate you,” he spoke with no malice.
“But you kissed me,” Richie refuted with a teasing look in his eyes, even as Eddie rolled his eyes and laid down beside the trashmouth, curling around him.
“Yeah, ‘cause I also kinda’ love you.”
“And now we’re together,” Richie finished, squeezing Eddie’s hand in his so tightly that he could probably break it if he squeezed even a little bit harder.
The clubhouse was full of losers, all of them spread around the room, but listening carefully, waiting for the boy to share his piece.
“This is new?” Beverly spoke up after a respectful pause of silence. Richie looked at Eddie for a moment before nodding.
“Yeah,” he answered awkwardly. “Like a week.”
“Shit,” Bill spoke, chuckling a little. He ran a hand through his hair, a smile on his face. “I th-th-thought you just m-meant you were t-t-telling us f-f-for the first t-time. This is a-a-actually new?”
Richie just stared at Bill and Beverly for a moment, trying to place the emotions going through his head in that moment. “You thought we were already dating? And you didn’t have a problem with it?”
The other losers all shared a collective awkward laugh. Except for Stan, who actually knew what was going on and was actually, not that he would admit it in front of everyone, very proud of his best friend.
“Richie, of course not,” Mike assured him, his trademark smile lighting up the room and making everyone know just how much he meant it. “We’re all losers, right? We ‘gotta stick together, no matter what.”
Despite his best judgment, Eddie couldn’t help himself any longer and grabbed Richie’s face, crashing their lips together in a way that could only be described as barely kissing, mostly smiling.
“Thanks guys,” Eddie spoke to all of his friends, not sure how to find the words to express how overjoyed he felt. “Seriously, you guys are the best.”
But Richie just loved to talk. He, apparently, couldn’t leave it at that.
“Can you guys even believe I scored our very own Eddie Spaghetti Kaspbrak? Me?” He laughed, wrapping his arms around Eddie’s shoulder and kissing his cheek so loudly even the other boy grimaced. “Our Eds with his tiny shorts and his fluffy hair and his eyes, likes me.” Even the others couldn’t help but laugh at that one, Stan even giving him a “beep beep Richie,” which he promptly ignored.
“Dickwad, my eyes are just brown,” Eddie laughed, blush covering his face and neck.
“Yeah, but they’re not just brown eyes,” Richie mused, the most dramatically love-struck look on his face as he squished Eddie’s cheeks in his hands. “They’re your brown eyes.”
“Oh my god,” Beverly groaned, sticking a cigarette in her mouth and pulling out a lighter. “Somebody please tell me why this is somehow worse than watching you two flirting while you were still in denial?”
“Yeah, but it was fun being in denial though,” Richie chuckled, ruffling Eddie’s hair. “‘Cause I got to have the cutest friend with benefits in the whole world.” Eddie flipped him off. “And ‘cause I just got to look at’cha. I just got to look at’cha until I realized I loved you.”
A heavy silence fell around the room. Everyone looked terrified. Except for Eddie, that is.
“You love him?” Ben spoke up nervously, hoping that shit wasn’t about to hit the fan.
“‘Course I do,” Richie answered like it was nothing.
“How…H-how do you know?” Bill asked.
Richie just looked over at Eddie with the most genuine look in his eyes and dramatically flopped his hand out into Eddie’s lap for the other boy to hold.
“Cause he’s the worst. And I’m probably even worse than that, but leaving myself out of the equation, he’s also the best thing in the whole goddamn world.” Richie’s eyes sparkled like he was looking at the most beautiful thing in the world which, to most people, wouldn’t be a small asthmatic boy with a Thundercats shirt and a fading scowl on his face, but it was to him. “And even if he decided he hated me tomorrow and dumped my ass on sight, I’d be okay as long as we’re always best friends. Seeing him smile is the only thing I ever want to see, even if it’s not because of me.”
"Damn," Mike smirked, holding up his hand for Richie to high-five. The latter reciprocated it enthusiastically. "I never thought you had it in ya', Trashmouth."
"Yeah, but you all knew I had it in your mo-"
"Beep beep Richie."
Nothing had changed.
Yet everything was somehow different.
Better.