Chapter Text
Unbound fate
“Amicia? Your mother wishes to talk to you.”
The addressed young woman, of age 17 since a few weeks, lowered her sling and turned her head around with a confused look to face the one approaching her. It was Lucas, her dear friend since two years and her mother’s new apprentice after Laurentius’ death and the family’s reunion. At first Amicia wanted to greet him with a smile, but the slightly worried look in his face let her upcoming smile fade away and the confusion in her eyes got replaced with concern; and if she thinks back to how he approached her, then his voice already gave something worrying off.
“She does…?” It was her first reaction out of surprise, having to blink at first before she could form a clearer response in her head: “Do you perhaps know what she wants to talk to me about?”
“Wish I knew- But sadly she didn’t tell me anything, only that she wishes to immediately talk to you,” Lucas shrugged his shoulders when he answered, mumbling still audibly when Amicia nodded slowly, “Though it does have to be something urgent by the way she said it… how she looked- almost heartbroken.”
“That indeed sounds very worrying...” The young brunette let out a soft sigh as she looked up to a window on the 2 nd floor of their (much smaller than their former) estate, which they had gotten as a gift by a generous old friend of Beatrice; the room of her mother’s study, or rather a small library with simple alchemistic devices.
“And not like her either,” Lucas chimed in with agreement, “Not that she is as heartbroken as she was after the bastion… that was a whole different and cruel story after all. But she usually at least greets someone before she requests something. But now she straight up asked me to go and fetch you the moment I opened the door.”
“Another reason why I should hurry then and find out what is on mother’s heart,” Amicia nodded once more, but this time with determination in her eyes as she took a few steps forward, only to turn around to face Lucas once more, “I won’t guarantee that I’ll hurry… but I’ll let you know what it was about, alright?”
The smaller boy nodded confidently as well and showed her a soft smile: “Mhm, I think I’ll go see if I find Hugo somewhere in the garden while you find out what is wrong. See you later?”
“Yeah, see you later,” With a wave and a not she left Lucas behind, making sure to hurry to her mother’s study room. Even if she was concerned about what request her mother had, and deep down even feared the worst, the uprising curiosity helped her to walk faster than she would have done if she was full of only concern.
Even though Amicia hurried to her mother’s room to find out what was wrong in a fast manner, she now stood still in front of the closed door since almost a minute. Her hand lowered itself for the 3 rd time in this minute; at first raised, ready to knock on the door, only to let anxiety struck Amicia and let all her confidence of finding out fade away. But she knew that she’ll have to push her nervousness away and knock sooner or later, rather later for her nerves.
After another few moments she took a deep breath, gathering all her confidence once more and hastily knocked on the door before the new found confidence could leave her again. A heartbeat later the soft voice of her mother chimed through the door to Amicia’s ears, allowing her to enter the small library. So with one last, deep breath she carefully opened the door to face her mother; and why she was urging to talk to her.
“Ah, Amicia! I’m glad to see that Lucas found you so fast,” Beatrice immediately stood up from the small chair she was sitting on the moment she turned around and saw her daughter to greet her with a soft smile and warm hug. Her daughter returned the hug lightly as she thought back to what Lucas said about a certain sadness in her mother’s eyes; and she knew what exactly he meant the moment she saw Beatrice’s smile, how its warming appearance did not reach her eyes, which seemed rather dull in comparison.
“You wished to see me, mother?” Amicia was the one who stepped back first as she asked, her voice full of concern about what could have happened. Not only did she worry because of the circumstances, the way her mother asked Lucas to search for her, but because of her mother’s face. This sad, almost sorry look, was similar to the one she had years ago, whenever Beatrice had to deny a request of her daughter to spend some time with her, as she had to work hard for a possible cure for Hugo. That certain look, the warm smile while Beatrice’s eyes were dull of sadness and unspoken apologies, was branded into the younger brunette’s mind and made Amicia’s heart beat faster as anxiety slowly began to rise up together with the wildest worries and imaginations about what could cause the reappearance of this smile.
The smile on her mother’s face began to fade and allowed the dull sadness of her eyes to invade the rest of her face as she let out a soft smile and nodded slowly: “Yes, my dear… I indeed wishes to speak with you about something.”
“About what, mother? What is concerning you?” The younger De Rune quizzed with even more concern in her voice than before; her anxiety increasing as well when she saw how her mother sighed deeply before answering:
“My dear daughter...” Beatrice’s voice broke and she had to stop to take a deep breath, another one when she saw the anxiety in her daughter’s eyes, which made her heart grow heavy, “You know… that certain duties of society are expected from everyone, yes?”
Her daughter only nodded silently and so she took it as a sign to continue with a soft sigh: “My dear, how old are you now?”
“I’m 17, mother… but you know that,” Amicia faltered with a tilted head, thousands of guesses and worries crossed her mind at that exact moment about what her mother was about to bring up; yet the most obvious was not among them, “So why are you asking…?”
Beatrice nodded silently but did not answer Amicia’s question immediately. Instead she started to slowly walk across the cramped library to look out of a small, a little bit dusty, window before she slowly started to speak once more: “Yes, you are 17 now… and are slowly reaching an age… which is considered too old for certain things-”
Once more Beatrice’s voice broke down; the few moments she needed to regain her voice passed painfully slow for Amicia, who was able to guess now what her mother was hinting at. Her suspicions only got confirmed when her mother turned around and spoke again, her voice drenched with regret and sadness: “We needed two years… to regain a stable status. We have managed to achieve peace with the Church as Vitalis was post mortum declared as a blasphemer and we therefore did not fight against them… And we have our noble status back. So it is time to fulfill duties again, which we were not able to take care of before. My dear… I see in your eyes that you know what I’m talking about.”
The younger De Rune nodded slowly and silently, as she let a few seconds pass to fully grasp every word her mother has said before she shakily whispered: “I… I think I know.”
It broke Beatrice’s heart to think about what she had to tell her beloved daughter now; the way Amicia’s head sunk to face the floor, her shoulders falling in dejection, only broke her heart more. But she knew, it had to come eventually. If she wanted to build a stable life for her children, one in wealth again, then this duty would have been inevitable. As a noble, especially as a noble family like the De Rune’s, who have risen out of the ashed, one automatically gets certain attention from the other part of gentry; it’s a noble spider’s web which awaits being weaved further. And now her family didn’t have to hide anymore, they could live a normal life… which had its price one must pay. If one did not, then that person sooner or later became socially dead; fatal nowadays, where your social status halfway guaranteed your mean of survival.
With one last, deep sigh, Beatrice took a step towards her daughter as she lamented slowly: “I’m so sorry, dear- But we both know that we do not have a choice when it comes to what is expected of us. I got a letter of the church… in which they inquired about why you have not been married off yet, my dear daughter. They understood that we needed time to rebuild our life- but I was… politely asked to take care of that matter.”
Her nose wrinkled in a displeased manner when she thought back to how she was obliged to find a suitor for Amicia before she continued: “I managed to still get a little bit of time left for us though. So a suitor will visit us in one or two weeks, rather two. Please do not panic, my dear, nothing is set yet. I was allowed to at first let one visit us so that we can at first see and even think about if an engagement shall happen or not. But I do not want to give you dead hope in rejecting him… so please prepare yourself for that an engagement will happen.”
Amicia did not respond, instead she silently looked on the floor as her mother’s words crossed her mind once more; an, most likely, inevitable engagement. Internally the younger De Rune let out a bitter sigh, she should have known that it had to come sooner or later. They were almost fully reintegrated in society, of course the usual business had to be picked up if they truly wanted to live a normal live. But on the outside she did not let out a single sound; minutes silently passed where Amicia processed what has been said and her mother was watching her anxiously, her arms halfway stretched out in an attempt to hug and comfort her while her eyes were overflowing with silent apologies.
It were a few, endlessly long minutes later when Amicia finally nodded slowly and let out a whispered “I understand...” before she basically fell into her mother’s arm and a frustrated huff escaped her lips: “It could really not have been postponed any longer…?”
Beatrice hugged her daughter tightly, almost clinging onto her in hopes of letting her comfort reach the younger De Rune, as she shook her head and sighed: “Sadly not… I promise you, I tried my best, but this was the longest time span I could get for you. Even though I wish it had not to happen… that I would not have to let go of you, I know that it has to be. And I know that you know too. We can only hope that you will still find your joy in life with how it’ll turn out- I know how much you love your freedom after all, my dear Amicia.”
The young brunette leaned against her mother’s shoulder as she gratefully listened to her soft voice and tried to calm a bit down through doing so. She only murmured quietly as a response a few moments after Beatrice finished talking: “Yes I know, of course… If only it wasn’t so soon-”
Her mother nodded as she fully understood what her daughter meant before she carefully stroke her hair, something she used to do every evening when Amicia was still small and didn’t want to sleep just yet, or whenever her little daughter started crying when she tripped again in the forest and needed comfort: “If only… But Amicia, dear, you surely still need a bit of time to get used to what will await you. You should get some rest for what is left of the day, I think you will need it to think clearly about it.”
“That would probably be the best… But I promised that I’ll join Lucas with Hugo before he’ll come back to you,” Amicia’s mind may has been clouded by dullness and sadness from thinking about what she will lose, yet she could not help but to let out a small smile at imagining her little brother happily picking flowers (the siblings never stopped their favorite tradition of putting various flowers in Amicia’s hair) while Lucas sat next to him, excitedly waiting for her to come back and tell him what Beatrice wanted to tell her.
“I see,” Her mother seemed to have a similar image in mind as she let out a soft giggle and nodded, “Then you should better not keep the two waiting. But please don’t forget to rest a lot, alright?”
“I won’t, mother,” The younger De Rune’s smile increased a bit as she announced her leaving with a stern nod of her head, “Thank you- for worrying. But I’ll be alright, I promise.”
“Of course I worry, dear. Just be careful please,” Her mother nodded equally stern even though her voice sounded as soft as silk, before her daughter left.
Amicia did not exactly rest like she had promised her mother earlier, everything she planned had stretched out longer than she thought: She did not hurry back to Lucas but instead slowly went through the hallways and the garden, head sunken as she was lost in thoughts, until the happy screech of Hugo and the following hug attack threw her back into reality. Even though she showed the two boys a cheerful smile, Lucas still saw behind it and immediately inquired her once Hugo was away to collect a certain flower he saw somewhere yesterday.
“So… an arranged engagement, huh?” The young apprentice stared at his feet, unsure of how to answer Amicia, who sat next to him on the ground.
“Yeah… I mean- I know it of course had to come… but still. It’s not fair,” Amicia sighed deeply and shook her head, aware of how childish she may sounded, but then again bluntly wording it helped her in dealing with it. It was one of the few things she learned from Mélie during their time together; to just bluntly let things out whenever they bug or frustrate you so that you’ll get rid of them in the most effective way. Realizing from who she learned it suddenly made her miss the red-haired thief and wonder where she had gone to. And even more importantly; if… and when they’ll meet again.
But before Amicia could wonder why she was missing Mélie when other things, the upcoming engagement, were by far more urgent, Lucas interrupted her train of thoughts with patting her shoulder as he searched for the right words: “Life never seems to be… whether you’re poor with no shelter from the rain, or a noble who is supposed to look good in social gatherings and is forced to live a caged life with pressuring standards… we all have our burdens to take. But don’t worry, you weren’t the only one who hoped for you being able to keep the freedom you got.”
“So you were hoping for me too? How kind of you,” The brunette woman let out a hoarse laugh and almost was able to answer in her playful tone she got whenever she was joking with one of her friends.
“Seeing you cheerful and laughing definitely is better and more calming to watch then remembering your almost constantly worried and stern face when we still were on the run from the inquisition. Of course I hoped you could keep your newly found joy,” Lucas started to laugh as he quickly nodded, but it quickly faded again when he remembered their original topic, “And so I of course wish that there somehow was a way that you could stay joyful… And that you could keep your freedom.”
“If there was a way… would you take it?” Amicia had no idea why that question slipped through her lips, she did not even have an idea of how such a way could possibly look like, but she already asked before she could think about what to answer to him.
Lucas seemed to be as irritated as her, whether it was because of how the answer was obvious to him, or because he noticed how confused Amicia was from asking that and so he let himself get influenced by that irritation. And so it took him a few moments before he shook his head in an irritated manner before he could finally answer with a nod: “Yes. After all it should always be about what makes you the happiest. And if I’d get the chance to escape from society’s forced fate and instead follow my happiness… then I’d take that chance.”
Amicia listened closely to his explanation and nodded her head slowly from time to time, wondering if there would open a new way up for her. And deciding that she’d follow Lucas’ advice if such a way should appear in front of her eyes. Yet she was not able to properly answer or even thank him, as Hugo ran towards them in a cheerful manner and both could not help but to get infatuated by that joyfulness and drop that topic. But the young apprentice’s advice never left her mind for the rest of the day.
Dinner passed by without much inconvenience; the concerned and apologetic looks that Beatrice gave her daughter of course went not unnoticed by both boys, but Hugo was easily consoled with that it was nothing, and Lucas already knew the reason behind it.
That was over two hours ago and Amicia was now laying on the side of her bed, ready to sleep with her nightgown on, but she did not want to move to lie properly and under a blanket, nor did she want to stand up to blow out the candle in her room or even think about sleeping in general. Today had been tough for her, even though nothing much or a lot of different things happened which needed to be worked out; just one big thought always crossing her mind: the upcoming and most likely to happen engagement.
Amicia let out a frustrated sigh and covered her eyes with her hands as she tried to work her thoughts around it out. She knew very well that she did not want to let herself get caged in a noble, golden cage or live a dull life behind the prosperous facade.
‘Nobody wants that after all, right…?’ was what she thought to herself as she let out a quiet but bitter laugh, but she had to correct herself in that statement when she thought back to some nobles she used to see whenever her parents and her attended a gathering or simply met up with her parent’s friends, who couldn’t wait for such a life as it was seen as a privilege.
As hard as she tried to imagine herself in such a role, in proper and wealthy clothes, being forced to attend all kinds of gathering while keeping a fake smile up wherever she was going, she could not grow fond of what will await her with the plan fate had in mind for her. And so she found herself letting out a soft sob as she buried her face more in her hands and silently prayed: ‘Oh dear God… please show me a way to escape. If you still love me, even after what I had done to protect Hugo… then please, please show me a new path…! Please…! Don’t let me end like this-’
As if fate itself had decided to chime in, a soft knocking was heard on Amicia’s window, which interrupted her inner praying and made her jump up. With tensed shoulders and an anxious look on her face, she quickly looked around the room in hopes of finding her sling; without a success.
Again someone or something knocked against her window, this time more hesitating than the first time; and Amicia found herself slowly walking to the window despite arguing with herself about what dangers she could face like this. But suddenly her inner discussion stopped and the young De Rune let out a soft gasp at what she saw. Without further hesitation, she hurried towards her window and threw it open, still in shock at the sight in front of her.
Fast heartbeats passed while Amicia stood there silently, not being able to fully process what she was seeing with her own two eyes until she was able to whisper: “M...Mélie…?”
~To be continued~