Chapter Text
Eddie waited impatiently for fucking trash boi to return.
Where the frick are you asshat. Me hoi hunger
He heard the front door open.
“Honey, I'm home!” called Richie. As Eddie turned into the hallway, he saw that Richie’s arms were filled with boxes of Chinese food.
“Where were you, bitchboy?” Eddie screeched.
“I was getting food, my spagetti-dicked darling,” Richie spoke in his fuckin annoying little voice.
Eddie blushed at such a statement about his genitals. “Gimme china food now my pussy of a boyfriend. Me hunger.” he said,walking back to the kitchen.
After the food had been laid out on the table, Richard began impersonating felatio on an egg roll. Eddie looked up and fuckin gay gasped as he thought richie would die of auto asphyxiation. Then he fuckin choked on his sticky ass rice. He just made a big fucking mess what a noodle head.
Rochie leaprded up and fuclin heimliched his lover, knocking over his fuckin food in the process. “Don't you die on me Eddie Spaghetti! HWAH!!!”” he yelled as he thrust.In his panic
Eddie spat out the food he choke on and panted as if he just had erotic intercourse. “R-Richie that was… so gooooood.” he whisper.
Richie rested his chin on eddies shoulder and kissy his neck because he looove a bitchboy. “Youre safe now bbyboy.” he whispered softly in his ear canal.
“Gosh darn it, I've made a mess!! I'm a stinky boy :(.” Said ed
Richie yell, “Eds, it's okay. We’'ll clean it up.”
“How?” Asked Eddie.
Richie smirked deviously. “Oh Daddy will show you how Baby boy!” he chuckled pushing him onto the table and eddies clothes dissappesred!. Richie grabbed soy and duck sauce and lathered eddies anal hole to such an extent that his butthole was dripping!
Eddie let out a sound of a wounded animal. Richie grabbed a chopstick and circled edwards hole making the boy giggle UwU “Daddy Rich that tickles!” just then richard thrusted the stick deep inside is butt! Eddie screech in pain “owowoOWOWOOWOWOWOWOWO THATS GOOD” he moaned vigorusly as his tiny 2 inch dinker lifted in excitment! And then, rchie shoved in a second stick and started to do the motion one would use when picking up food like a normal hetero human being.
Richie removed the sticks and instead inserted his little Chihuahua. Richie grabbed a handful of chicken and sticky rice and smeared it through eddies hair. Eddie moaned loudly.
After Richie came, Eddie turned around. “That was deliscus, my turn,” Eddie say all gay n shit.
He filled his hands with chinken and began rubbing it on Richie’s nipples. Richie groaned like a bear or smth.
“Are you hungry babe?” Eddie asked.
“yeah, and horny” he winked
Eddie smirked as he go on his wittle knees and covered richards 90 incher cock in rice “Its like sushi!” he giggiled as he ate haappily and made wittle num num sounds!!!
When they finished, then laid on the table, covered in several types of sticky goo ;) soy,duck,teriyaki,secret, and seamen sauce to be exact!
“Ready for a fortune cookie, eds” asked richi÷.
“only if you are, my hunny bunny,” reply spag boy.
As he cracked the cookie, he squeezed his bfs lil d. Bill and lil jew boy the rapper stan the man walk in wearing matching acid washedripped jeans and have a bagfrom h&m with friendship acid washed ripped jeans in hand so Eddie and Richie can match. stan gasped, appalled by such a mess “My valentino white table!” he weeped and then bill smirked “ill have what reddies having” he said smoooching his mans face hole
*laugh track*
*credits role*