Chapter Text
Peter Stark had a secret. And not his Spider-Man secret.
No, everyone important in his life knew about him being Spider-Man, especially after the recent very confusing time-wise events. His after school and occasional weekend activities wasn’t his big secret. No, his big secret was something that if his parents knew, he’d get in a lot more trouble for.
Peter wasn’t sleeping.
It wasn’t like he wasn’t tired. He had definitely nodded off in class a few times. Mr. Harrington either hadn’t noticed or trusted that Peter was smart enough to be fine without that section of notes. Mr. Dell, a new teacher who even though Peter found his presence strange he liked him well enough, had caught him dozing off in class. Unlike Mr. Harrington, he hadn’t been cool with it and made Peter stand up for the rest of the time (which Peter preferred over cold calling on him for whatever he had been lecturing the class about). Ned had had to poke him a few times in Robotics Club and Band, especially when he almost started drooling on his music one day. And MJ had resorted to chucking paper balls at him every time he dozed off in Decathlon.
So, he definitely was tired. He just didn’t want to sleep.
Every time he closed his eyes, his brain had a new horror for him. It was worse than after Homecoming. He had been dragged into space by aliens, faded out of existence in his dad’s arms, nearly died on a battlefield, and almost lost his dad. And his brain seemed only interested in reminding him of all of this. It hadn’t happened right away. He had been too busy feeling out of place and lonely in his own home. But after the vow renewal, things were fine for a few weeks. Peter had hoped that after the vow renewal after everything finally calmed down that things would be okay.
He was wrong, of course. Things were far from okay.
And then the nightmares started.
He remembered the first night he woke, shaking and gasping for air, terrified of every shadow of darkness in his room. He very quickly realized his dad had not reset FRIDAY’s alert systems as he had sat in the darkness, trying to calm himself down and no one showed up to check on him. But knowing his dad, those alerts were going to go back into place soon. And Peter had an awful feeling that his nightmares and fears weren’t just going to go away.
So, he had to get creative.
An easy solution was Morgan. She loved bedtime stories and seemed to really want Peter to tell her stories. So, Peter would happily tell Morgan stories, until she literally couldn’t keep her eyes open. But his sister was four and went to sleep relatively early. Peter would then hang around the kitchen or the living room, helping Pepper with dishes or making his lunch for school or just generally talking to his dad. But eventually, he would be sent off to his room with the expectation that he would go to sleep. From there, Peter had a list of things he could do to stay away.
The first one was leaving the light on. That one was a must; Peter couldn’t be afraid of the shadows if they weren’t there). The second was to do his homework. He even would sometimes get a head start on homework that wasn’t due for a while. The third option on the list was patrol. If he could be out on patrol, he’d stay out for as long as possible. Eventually Karen would tell him he had to go home or his dad would call him. And if all else failed, Peter would read. Peter discovered that reading could keep him up for a while. Sometimes it was a fiction book that had been lying around his room forever. Other times, he would re-read papers his dad or Bruce had written, making notes to himself on ideas or questions he had regarding their research (including Bruce’s new paper on bringing together his two halves which Peter found oddly fascinating).
He wasn’t sure how he was managing to get away with his lack of sleep. In the past, he knew his dad always made sure he was asleep, whether it was checking on him or just standing by the door. But since he had used the stones, his dad slept a lot more. He knew it was important to his recovery, but Peter found it odd that his dad was sleeping so much. This was the guy that used to stay up all night in his lab, tinkering on projects. His mom didn’t seem to mind, but then again, she had been scolding his dad about his sleep schedule since before Peter was born. Perhaps, in a different time, his dad might’ve noticed sooner. But Peter was seemingly getting away with barely sleeping on weeknights.
But he knew his luck was going to run out soon.
“Tired kiddo?” The whole family was sitting on the couch watching a movie. It was Friday night and his dad had determined Friday’s were going to be family movie night. His dad had really done a lot in the last few weeks to make sure Peter didn’t start feeling like he didn’t belong again. Peter had been fighting back a yawn when his dad had spotted it.
“Just a reflex,” Peter said. Morgan, who was squished next to him on the couch looked up at him. “I think someone else made me yawn because she did first.” He poked her stomach and Morgan stuck her tongue out at him.
“Uh uh,” Morgan said. “I’m not sleepy.” Peter just scooped her up, so she was sitting on his lap and Morgan giggled. Tony just smiled watching the two of them. He was in awe of his two kids every day, even more so now that he actually got to see them together. Morgan adored Peter and hung onto his every word. And Peter was clearly made to be an older brother with how he took care of Morgan. It was truly incredible watching the two of them together.
“Well I think we all should get some shut eye,” Tony said, reaching for his cane. He had decided against a brace similar to Rhodey’s and opting for using a cane instead. “Because someone has a training session with the head spider in the morning. And, we need to do some routine maintenance on the Iron Spider suit.” They were spending the weekend at the Tower, instead of the cabin, because of Nat’s training schedule. She wanted to train Peter as she hadn’t truly had the chance before. Wanda was tagging along as well, because she stuck close to Nat. Tony wondered if it was her way of coping with losing Vision, but he felt wrong in asking.
“Can Petey tuck me in and read me a story?” Morgan asked.
“You, little miss,” Pepper said. “Are up way past your bedtime. So, it’s right to bed with you.” Morgan pouted but Pepper stuck to her guns and scooped the child up.
“Night mom,” Peter said as Pepper carried Morgan off to her room.
“You need to get to bed as well,” Tony said. Peter nodded, even though he didn’t want to go to sleep, and got up. He helped his dad up, even though his dad was needing less and less help every day. He spent most of his days in physical therapy. He was going to need the cane for the rest of his life, but so long as that was a very long time, Tony would willingly take that over the alternative.
“You okay kiddo?” Tony asked as they made their way towards Peter’s room. “You’ve just been…what’s the right word here…quiet I suppose.”
“Just a lot on my mind,” Peter said. “School, decathlon, band, robotics. It’s a lot.”
“You can talk to me about all of it, you know that, right?” Peter smiled a little and nodded. They reached Peter’s door and Tony sighed a little. “I love you bambino, don’t you ever forget that.”
“I know dad,” Peter said, before gently hugging his dad. Tony tugged him closer with the arm that wasn’t balanced on the cane. He pressed a kiss to the side of his son’s hair. “I love you too.”
“Good,” Tony said, letting him go. “Now get some rest. You know how Nat is when people are sleepy during her training sessions.” Peter nodded and then headed into his room. He sighed and leaned against the closed door. He listened carefully as he heard his dad head down the hallway. Once he reached his own room and the door shut, Peter let out another sigh.
There was no way he was going to sleep.
Peter looked around in fright, searching for someone, anyone to help him. But all he saw was darkness.
“Hello?” He called out, hoping someone could hear him. “Hello!” But there was nothing. He felt his chest tighten and the hairs stand up on his arm. He slowly turned around, feeling like something was there.
And then the gauntlet with the stones was in his hands.
He could see the ships above him, aiming down at him. He let out a yelp as he dove away and cowered in fear. He couldn’t fight down the frightened shouts this time as he prayed that none of the blasts would hit him.
He was going to die here. He wasn’t going to make it.
“Peter!” Peter woke with a start, feeling the panic clawing up his chest as his dream still held onto him. “Breathe bambino, breathe.” He sucked in deep breaths as he regained his bearings. He wasn’t on the battlefield being rained down by gunfire from alien ships. He was in his room, sitting in his bed. He looked around and spotted Pepper by the door. Her hand was by her knee, and through the darkness, he could see Morgan poking her head past their mother’s hand. His dad was sitting on his, trying to calm him down.
“Wha…What happened?” He asked, wondering why they were all there.
“Lights FRI,” Tony said. The lights came on gently and Peter could better see the look of concern on his dad’s face. “Morgan got out of bed and heard you screaming. She came and got us.” Peter looked down at his lap, embarrassed. “Kiddo, what’s wrong?” Peter didn’t say anything and Tony sighed.
“Morgan no,” Peter looked up as Morgan somehow got around Pepper and into the room. She ignored Pepper and ran over to the bed, pulling herself up quickly. And then she was squished against Peter’s side, hugging him.
“Do you want Platy back?” Morgan asked, her voice small and innocent. Peter looked down at Morgan and smiled sadly.
“But then who will keep you safe when you’re scared?” Peter asked. Morgan shrugged and Peter hugged her, kissing the top of her head. “You keep him, Mor. What’s going to help me is saying what’s wrong.” He looked up at his dad and then at Pepper. Pepper walked into the room and sat down next to Tony.
“Go ahead sweetie.”
“I don’t want to sleep,” Peter said. “Because every time I try to, I just keep seeing something so horrible and frightening that I just don’t know how to deal with.”
“What was tonight’s?” Tony asked gently.
“D-During the battle,” Peter said. “I-I got the gauntlet from T’Challa and I j-just needed to protect it. And I-I was fine at first. Mom helped me and Thor’s friend on the Pegasus helped me. But then, all the ships started firing at me. A-and t-there was nothing I could do.” He felt tears bubble out of his eyes. “I-I t-thought I was going to d-die.” Tony just pulled Peter closer to him. Pepper reached out and gently brushed a few tears off his cheek as Morgan continued to hug him.
“But you didn’t,” Tony said gently. “Danvers got the gauntlet and you were okay. You are okay. We all are.” Peter just nodded.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you what was wrong,” Peter said. “I just…I thought I could handle it.”
“By not sleeping?” Tony asked. “God, you really are my son.”
“What your father means,” Pepper said. “Is that keeping yourself up to avoid your problems, isn’t healthy.”
“I know,” Peter said, a sadness to his voice.
“Kid we’re all here for you,” Tony said. “We’re never too busy or tired or injured to be here for you, okay?” Peter nodded. “And how come FRIDAY didn’t tell me about this sooner?”
“I don’t think you put your old protocols back in place,” Peter said. Tony sighed.
“FRIDAY,” Tony said. “New Protocol; alert me anytime either of my children wake up in the middle of the night. Call it the Worried Parent Protocol.” Peter chuckled a little, earning a smirk from Tony.
“Done boss.”
“Good,” Tony said. “Because it’s our job to help you through something like this. To help both of you.” Peter nodded and glanced at Morgan who was staring at him.
“Are you feeling better now Petey?” Peter smiled at her and then looked at his parents. He felt bad for not telling them the truth sooner, but it was clear they were more concerned than upset. He smiled a little and nodded.
“Yeah Morgan,” Peter said. “I am.” Maybe he’d still have the nightmares. And maybe he’d need to sleep with the light on for a while. But he had his family there to help him. And to him, that mean everything was going to be okay.
“Good,” Morgan said, hugging him.
“Alright little miss,” Pepper said. “Back to your own bed.” Peter leaned down and kissed the top of his sister’s head, earning a big smile from her. Then she got out of the bed and took Pepper’s hand. “Get some rest if you can sweetie.” Peter nodded and then Pepper left the room with Morgan.
“I’m going to call Nat,” Tony said.
“No dad,” Peter said. “Don’t cancel. I need the training.”
“I know that,” Tony said, moving so he was sitting next to Peter. “But it’s a little after three and you need more than six hours of sleep. So, I’m just going to tell her to push her training time back. She’ll understand.” Peter nodded, a hint of embarrassment creeping up. “We’ve all been where you are kiddo. It’s okay.”
“Okay,” Peter said. “Are you going to stay here until I fall asleep?”
“You know me so well, bambino,” Peter smiled a little and rested his head on his dad’s shoulder. “Lights on?”
“Yes please.” Tony nodded and kissed the top of his son’s head. “Thanks dad.”
“Anytime bambino.” And he meant it. Living five years without Peter, it had been an unending hell. But he had his son back and he would so anything to protect him and make him feel safe. And if that meant waking up at 3 AM to check on him, Tony would do that. Anything along those lines was worth it; Peter was worth that and more to him. He stayed there for a while, even after Peter’s breath evened out and it was clear his son was asleep.
“Tony.” He heard Pepper’s gentle voice and looked up. Tony slowly got up, taking care to not disturb Peter. He then made his way over to the door. He glanced back at Peter as Pepper gently leaned against him.
“He’s going to be okay,” She whispered.
“I know.” He then nodded to the hallway and they left the room. Tony closed the door, making sure to leave the lights on and then followed Pepper down the hallway.
Peter was going to be okay. They all were. Of that Tony was certain.